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What is love?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Inspired by the lovely Estella's thread, how do you know when its love not lust?
My first love was as a teen. I was shy and a bit naive and he was a handsome older guy. Everyone said it was just a crush but I knew it was more because he changed me. He gave me the confidence I was missing and completed me as a person.
I knew it wasn't lust because the hard times made me want to be with him more. We had great sex but even when that stopped my feelings were the same. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Inspired by the lovely Estella's thread, how do you know when its love not lust?
My first love was as a teen. I was shy and a bit naive and he was a handsome older guy. Everyone said it was just a crush but I knew it was more because he changed me. He gave me the confidence I was missing and completed me as a person.
I knew it wasn't lust because the hard times made me want to be with him more. We had great sex but even when that stopped my feelings were the same. "
I think I lust you, Bunny.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When everything that should force you apart just makes you want to be together more. Feeling complete when with them, and letting them see the vulnerable side of you feels right and no longer scary.
It's hard to explain, just nice to feel x  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Goodness.
It's actions over words. It's trying your hardest to understand someone even if you haven't been through what they have. It's the little things like making sure they've eaten. Making them smile. Listening. Taking care of them when they're ill. Understanding when they just need company and offering it instead of waiting for them to ask. Knowing what their favourite drink is. Offering a comfortable safe environment.
Actually all the above reminds me of someone I almost thought I loved once. Now I think I did.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm in love. I don't know how I know, I just do. He's just my absolute everything..he completes me and I am not me without him. However there is lust there too as I am always lusting over him. I couldn't imagine being with anyone else and i wouldn't want to be either
I think one reason I know i am is because I thought I was with someone else before but now I know I wasn't. I couldn't have been.
What is this crazy, stupid, amazing thing we call love? |
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By *at3232Woman
over a year ago
the moon |
"When everything that should force you apart just makes you want to be together more. Feeling complete when with them, and letting them see the vulnerable side of you feels right and no longer scary.
It's hard to explain, just nice to feel x "
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When everything that should force you apart just makes you want to be together more. Feeling complete when with them, and letting them see the vulnerable side of you feels right and no longer scary.
It's hard to explain, just nice to feel x "
I like this |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Inspired by the lovely Estella's thread, how do you know when its love not lust?
My first love was as a teen. I was shy and a bit naive and he was a handsome older guy. Everyone said it was just a crush but I knew it was more because he changed me. He gave me the confidence I was missing and completed me as a person.
I knew it wasn't lust because the hard times made me want to be with him more. We had great sex but even when that stopped my feelings were the same.
I think I lust you, Bunny. "
Ditto |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Goodness.
It's actions over words. It's trying your hardest to understand someone even if you haven't been through what they have. It's the little things like making sure they've eaten. Making them smile. Listening. Taking care of them when they're ill. Understanding when they just need company and offering it instead of waiting for them to ask. Knowing what their favourite drink is. Offering a comfortable safe environment.
Actually all the above reminds me of someone I almost thought I loved once. Now I think I did. "
I always think if its right you'll know. Youd have known x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"when i feel cared for, with actions not contradictory words.
i'll give up my time and wants for people i love also and put myself last. right now i'm really enjoying loving myself more.  "
A bit of self love never hurt anyone |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"when i feel cared for, with actions not contradictory words.
i'll give up my time and wants for people i love also and put myself last. right now i'm really enjoying loving myself more.
A bit of self love never hurt anyone "
can't love yourself on a sex site without someone taking that the wrong way, haha. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"when i feel cared for, with actions not contradictory words.
i'll give up my time and wants for people i love also and put myself last. right now i'm really enjoying loving myself more.
A bit of self love never hurt anyone
can't love yourself on a sex site without someone taking that the wrong way, haha."
Or asking to watch |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's an emotion that smacks you in the face and throws you into a world of confusion."
I like that, when its unexpected but feels so right even though you cant explain why. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When they get your last rolo obviously! 
I don't even like rolos but Id take it for the sentiment "
Could be replaced with maltesers or jelly tots too, just not a curly wurly...thats deep love  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Love is.....
Unconditional.
Being there no matter what.
In sickness.
In health.
The little things that make you go tingly.
The silly nicknames you give each other.
The silly stupid smiles .
The stupid fights.
The make up sex.
This is love.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think love is when you can't stop thinking about someone.. no matter how much time has passed between the time you last spoke. When nearly every thought you have takes that other person into consideration before you act. When you begin to place their needs in equal importance to your own.
When it hurts to not be with them and that pain doesn't fade in time.
When the sight of them, or sound of their voice lifts you up, no matter how bedraggled they may look or how low you may be feeling.
Those feelings need time to bloom though. Too many confuse lust for love.
Lust is excitement, joy, passion, pain, confusion and chaos.. electric. In my humble opinion. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think love is when you can't stop thinking about someone.. no matter how much time has passed between the time you last spoke. When nearly every thought you have takes that other person into consideration before you act. When you begin to place their needs in equal importance to your own.
When it hurts to not be with them and that pain doesn't fade in time.
When the sight of them, or sound of their voice lifts you up, no matter how bedraggled they may look or how low you may be feeling.
Those feelings need time to bloom though. Too many confuse lust for love.
Lust is excitement, joy, passion, pain, confusion and chaos.. electric. In my humble opinion."
That's all in relation to a partner obviously.. lots of other loves are available from participating retail outlets.. children, parental, sibling, friend, neighbour, nation (bizarre), pets, interests and the rest of humanity. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think love is when you can't stop thinking about someone.. no matter how much time has passed between the time you last spoke. When nearly every thought you have takes that other person into consideration before you act. When you begin to place their needs in equal importance to your own.
When it hurts to not be with them and that pain doesn't fade in time.
When the sight of them, or sound of their voice lifts you up, no matter how bedraggled they may look or how low you may be feeling.
Those feelings need time to bloom though. Too many confuse lust for love.
Lust is excitement, joy, passion, pain, confusion and chaos.. electric. In my humble opinion."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think love is when you can't stop thinking about someone.. no matter how much time has passed between the time you last spoke. When nearly every thought you have takes that other person into consideration before you act. When you begin to place their needs in equal importance to your own.
When it hurts to not be with them and that pain doesn't fade in time.
When the sight of them, or sound of their voice lifts you up, no matter how bedraggled they may look or how low you may be feeling.
Those feelings need time to bloom though. Too many confuse lust for love.
Lust is excitement, joy, passion, pain, confusion and chaos.. electric. In my humble opinion.
"
You like? Lol. That's just the way I see it. I've confused lust for love way too many times in the past. I hope I don't make the same mistake again. Not likely as I hardly ever see anyone these days it seems. Too busy working and being a dad. And no local single women I'm attracted to seem to give me the time of day on here or dating sites. I am pretty fussy though - when it comes to emotional commitments  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think love is when you can't stop thinking about someone.. no matter how much time has passed between the time you last spoke. When nearly every thought you have takes that other person into consideration before you act. When you begin to place their needs in equal importance to your own.
When it hurts to not be with them and that pain doesn't fade in time.
When the sight of them, or sound of their voice lifts you up, no matter how bedraggled they may look or how low you may be feeling.
Those feelings need time to bloom though. Too many confuse lust for love.
Lust is excitement, joy, passion, pain, confusion and chaos.. electric. In my humble opinion.
You like? Lol. That's just the way I see it. I've confused lust for love way too many times in the past. I hope I don't make the same mistake again. Not likely as I hardly ever see anyone these days it seems. Too busy working and being a dad. And no local single women I'm attracted to seem to give me the time of day on here or dating sites. I am pretty fussy though - when it comes to emotional commitments "
That's the thing though, I don't think love happens when you look for it. If you really want something you see it when it isn't there, you convince yourself it is because you want it to be.
You'll meet someone who will blow your mind without trying x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are different kind of love, the love you have have for a partner is one thing to truly love is to love your children, that feeling of you would do anything and everything for them, you put them before all else
But then your partner can't deal with that level of love you show for someone else even if it's their child and they love is half because of them
The sad realisation Is can you love anyone else enough so that they don't feel neglected
Passion and lust are amazing but I think love is a hard one
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Love is a unique connection between two individuals. It doesn't have to be two humans and it can include an inanimate object for the strange few. We live in a bizarre world.
Love for a partner is something which takes over our thoughts and makes our heart skip a best whenever we see them and the strongest is when we put their needs and desires way ahead of our own. We accept them for their faults and bad habits and grow as a person with the strength they give, just by being there and accepting us for who we are, warts and all.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think love is when you can't stop thinking about someone.. no matter how much time has passed between the time you last spoke. When nearly every thought you have takes that other person into consideration before you act. When you begin to place their needs in equal importance to your own.
When it hurts to not be with them and that pain doesn't fade in time.
When the sight of them, or sound of their voice lifts you up, no matter how bedraggled they may look or how low you may be feeling.
Those feelings need time to bloom though. Too many confuse lust for love.
Lust is excitement, joy, passion, pain, confusion and chaos.. electric. In my humble opinion.
You like? Lol. That's just the way I see it. I've confused lust for love way too many times in the past. I hope I don't make the same mistake again. Not likely as I hardly ever see anyone these days it seems. Too busy working and being a dad. And no local single women I'm attracted to seem to give me the time of day on here or dating sites. I am pretty fussy though - when it comes to emotional commitments
That's the thing though, I don't think love happens when you look for it. If you really want something you see it when it isn't there, you convince yourself it is because you want it to be.
You'll meet someone who will blow your mind without trying x"
Oh I know that too, couldn't agree more. I'm pretty laid back. I'm not searching for anything in particular. It just seems to be the case that I'm in a job that eats up masses of my time.. driving away then stopping overnight.. have my children when I get home.. hand them back and go to bed happy.. but alone. Alone in the truck, alone in the bed, alone all the time.. except with my kids.. whom I really love. But there doesn't seem to be much time to meet people, let alone fall in lust, let alone love.
Smallest violin is chirping up somewhere about now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think love is when you can't stop thinking about someone.. no matter how much time has passed between the time you last spoke. When nearly every thought you have takes that other person into consideration before you act. When you begin to place their needs in equal importance to your own.
When it hurts to not be with them and that pain doesn't fade in time.
When the sight of them, or sound of their voice lifts you up, no matter how bedraggled they may look or how low you may be feeling.
Those feelings need time to bloom though. Too many confuse lust for love.
Lust is excitement, joy, passion, pain, confusion and chaos.. electric. In my humble opinion.
You like? Lol. That's just the way I see it. I've confused lust for love way too many times in the past. I hope I don't make the same mistake again. Not likely as I hardly ever see anyone these days it seems. Too busy working and being a dad. And no local single women I'm attracted to seem to give me the time of day on here or dating sites. I am pretty fussy though - when it comes to emotional commitments
That's the thing though, I don't think love happens when you look for it. If you really want something you see it when it isn't there, you convince yourself it is because you want it to be.
You'll meet someone who will blow your mind without trying x
Oh I know that too, couldn't agree more. I'm pretty laid back. I'm not searching for anything in particular. It just seems to be the case that I'm in a job that eats up masses of my time.. driving away then stopping overnight.. have my children when I get home.. hand them back and go to bed happy.. but alone. Alone in the truck, alone in the bed, alone all the time.. except with my kids.. whom I really love. But there doesn't seem to be much time to meet people, let alone fall in lust, let alone love.
Smallest violin is chirping up somewhere about now "
And before you say.. change jobs.. I can't afford to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Tis a many splendoured thing...
Elusive but worth the search
Or perhaps just waking up next to someone whose life means more than your own...
And knowing that there is no better place in the world to be..
But then the most elusive things are those worth searching for... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Being in love is magical yet totally scary once you've had your heart broke. It's handing over your trust your feelings and your total being to another person , allowing them an insight to your soul letting them see how you think feel and believe, you give that person your soul and that to me is the most special thing ever.
Yet brake that trust and bond then it's very hard to mend |
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2 people who can be 100% themselves with each other. Act silly, talk in their own language. Can show vulnerabilities. Are interested in each other. Safe,comfortable and reliable and the realisation this is the person you want to be with for the rest of your life |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Im loving (no pun intended) all the replies.
A certain Scotsman who is on holiday says
"What is love?
Love is life, it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.
True Love is the most beautiful thing in the world.
Unfortunately the heartache of love concludes me to say, love doesn't live here anymore more fs."
Id tell him that hes only stopping himself from experiencing "the most beautiful thing in the world" and whats the point in that? Surely its better to see the color for a while than to live in the Grey forever? |
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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago
A world of my own |
Love is giving someone the ability to completely break your heart, but hoping and trusting them when they say they won't.
Sadly for me both times they did.
Despite that I still believe that one of the greatest achievements in life is to love someone and be loved in return.
I'm a hopeless romantic. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Love is giving someone the ability to completely break your heart, but hoping and trusting them when they say they won't.
Sadly for me both times they did.
Despite that I still believe that one of the greatest achievements in life is to love someone and be loved in return.
I'm a hopeless romantic. "
Same here |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Love is giving someone the ability to completely break your heart, but hoping and trusting them when they say they won't.
Sadly for me both times they did.
Despite that I still believe that one of the greatest achievements in life is to love someone and be loved in return.
I'm a hopeless romantic. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Love...Changes everything..I was in love with an Irish traveler years ago..Havent seen him in thirty years ,and never will again,but i still love him,and always will. |
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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago
Wakefield |
"Inspired by the lovely Estella's thread, how do you know when its love not lust?
"
That is easy love is about giving and doing the best you can for the person/people you love.
Lust is taking and sating your own feelings and desires.
The more complicated question is to differentiate between love and infatuation.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Inspired by the lovely Estella's thread, how do you know when its love not lust?
That is easy love is about giving and doing the best you can for the person/people you love.
Lust is taking and sating your own feelings and desires.
The more complicated question is to differentiate between love and infatuation.
"
Ain't that the truth. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Inspired by the lovely Estella's thread, how do you know when its love not lust?
My first love was as a teen. I was shy and a bit naive and he was a handsome older guy. Everyone said it was just a crush but I knew it was more because he changed me. He gave me the confidence I was missing and completed me as a person.
I knew it wasn't lust because the hard times made me want to be with him more. We had great sex but even when that stopped my feelings were the same. "
love is never having to say youre sorry ,love is waking up in an embrace ,love is all consuming or just there ,love is knowing what they are thinking before they do ,love is knowing how to make your partner feel great even when you dont feel great ,love is communicating, love is trust and loyalty |
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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago
Filthy Fuckeryville |
It's something you don't look for, it's something that just happens, you can't manufacture it.
Whatsmore it has to be genuinely felt on both sides or it's kinda awful.
Shocks shit out of you at times when you suddenly realise that you are in it!  |
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Love is giving a piece of yourself to someone and when it's over you lose that piece and rebuild
Meeting and loving someone else you give another piece. Love is never the same. You grow as people together when you love. Love is crazy, scary, messy, brilliant, uncontrollable and butterflies in your stomach when you know your going to see them.
Hope this makes sense, it's so much more than words
Buttons |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Love is giving a piece of yourself to someone and when it's over you lose that piece and rebuild
Meeting and loving someone else you give another piece. Love is never the same. You grow as people together when you love. Love is crazy, scary, messy, brilliant, uncontrollable and butterflies in your stomach when you know your going to see them.
Hope this makes sense, it's so much more than words
Buttons "
Its really hard to explain. Like no matter what you say it'll never be enough. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A choice and an action. awwwww a good choice and a good reaction?"
Not always. I think love between partners is a choice you have to keep making to stay together. Sometimes we make poor choices. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Inspired by the lovely Estella's thread, how do you know when its love not lust?
My first love was as a teen. I was shy and a bit naive and he was a handsome older guy. Everyone said it was just a crush but I knew it was more because he changed me. He gave me the confidence I was missing and completed me as a person.
I knew it wasn't lust because the hard times made me want to be with him more. We had great sex but even when that stopped my feelings were the same. love is never having to say youre sorry ,love is waking up in an embrace ,love is all consuming or just there ,love is knowing what they are thinking before they do ,love is knowing how to make your partner feel great even when you dont feel great ,love is communicating, love is trust and loyalty"
This , the butterflies every time you hear their voice or see them come through the door. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I thought I'd answer this in a song I just recorded - it's a bit raw, rough and ready but hey it's different
The Rose - https://youtu.be/Mbip2zdPb1M"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Love is like:
A Red, Red Rose
By Robert Burns
O my Luve is like a red, red rose
That’s newly sprung in June;
O my Luve is like the melody
That’s sweetly played in tune.
So fair art thou, my bonnie lass,
So deep in luve am I;
And I will luve thee still, my dear,
Till a’ the seas gang dry.
Till a’ the seas gang dry, my dear,
And the rocks melt wi’ the sun;
I will love thee still, my dear,
While the sands o’ life shall run.
And fare thee weel, my only luve!
And fare thee weel awhile!
And I will come again, my luve,
Though it were ten thousand mile.
But the heartache and pain is simply not worth it, once bitten, twice shy fs. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So bunnyhop.. do you have the best answer yet?"
I already know the answer because Ive been in love. I still dont know how to put it into words though  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A choice and an action. awwwww a good choice and a good reaction?
Not always. I think love between partners is a choice you have to keep making to stay together. Sometimes we make poor choices. "
no I think its a sign of the times unfortunately people used to try harder before |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"So bunnyhop.. do you have the best answer yet?"
There isn't a best answer as such, only one that the OP feels she connects more strongly with.
Love is such an abstract yet powerful term and everyone brings their own feelings and memories and experiences to try and help them define it in a way that's easily accessible for another. But our language is limited; there's only so much of a clichéd saying you can put that fits how you feel.
You can't say one definition is 'best' but you can say one resonates more strongly with you. Love is whatever a person feels it to be. Whether or not the lexicon is there to describe it is another matter.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So bunnyhop.. do you have the best answer yet?
I already know the answer because Ive been in love. I still dont know how to put it into words though "
youre only young you will be in love again and for different reasons |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So bunnyhop.. do you have the best answer yet?
There isn't a best answer as such, only one that the OP feels she connects more strongly with.
Love is such an abstract yet powerful term and everyone brings their own feelings and memories and experiences to try and help them define it in a way that's easily accessible for another. But our language is limited; there's only so much of a clichéd saying you can put that fits how you feel.
You can't say one definition is 'best' but you can say one resonates more strongly with you. Love is whatever a person feels it to be. Whether or not the lexicon is there to describe it is another matter.
"
I'm heart-busting over this answer. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ive bever been in love with a woman but i love my family think the old endorphines kick in start acting like an idiot.
Def an buzz when your in thier company |
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"Goodness.
It's actions over words. It's trying your hardest to understand someone even if you haven't been through what they have. It's the little things like making sure they've eaten. Making them smile. Listening. Taking care of them when they're ill. Understanding when they just need company and offering it instead of waiting for them to ask. Knowing what their favourite drink is. Offering a comfortable safe environment.
Actually all the above reminds me of someone I almost thought I loved once. Now I think I did. "
That should be done for any human being. You'd do that if you were a carer of any description. Or should.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So bunnyhop.. do you have the best answer yet?
I already know the answer because Ive been in love. I still dont know how to put it into words though youre only young you will be in love again and for different reasons "
I hope so. Id go through pain and heartache a million times over just to feel love again. When my husband died I didnt think id ever want to let anyone in but if someone makes me feel loved like he did then Im up for it. Until then Im happy with what I have x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So bunnyhop.. do you have the best answer yet?
I already know the answer because Ive been in love. I still dont know how to put it into words though youre only young you will be in love again and for different reasons
I hope so. Id go through pain and heartache a million times over just to feel love again. When my husband died I didnt think id ever want to let anyone in but if someone makes me feel loved like he did then Im up for it. Until then Im happy with what I have x"
awwww I hope you find it and sorry for your loss |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So bunnyhop.. do you have the best answer yet?
I already know the answer because Ive been in love. I still dont know how to put it into words though youre only young you will be in love again and for different reasons
I hope so. Id go through pain and heartache a million times over just to feel love again. When my husband died I didnt think id ever want to let anyone in but if someone makes me feel loved like he did then Im up for it. Until then Im happy with what I have xawwww I hope you find it and sorry for your loss "
Thank you x |
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By *irceWoman
over a year ago
Gloucester |
Love is the captive heart, a purgatory of self awareness for a while when first encountered,maybe the first time we get to share ourselves deeply and want to explore anothers deepest desires/needs if you are lucky a soulmate you will find.
Love is a force, beautiful in nature as well as a cruel destroyer of mind and soul if you are unlucky.
A world without love is a bleak prospect...
Hope A.I is not void of this..
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"Love is the captive heart, a purgatory of self awareness for a while when first encountered,maybe the first time we get to share ourselves deeply and want to explore anothers deepest desires/needs if you are lucky a soulmate you will find.
Love is a force, beautiful in nature as well as a cruel destroyer of mind and soul if you are unlucky.
A world without love is a bleak prospect...
Hope A.I is not void of this..
"
Agree with that for sure xx |
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"Inspired by the lovely Estella's thread, how do you know when its love not lust?
My first love was as a teen. I was shy and a bit naive and he was a handsome older guy. Everyone said it was just a crush but I knew it was more because he changed me. He gave me the confidence I was missing and completed me as a person.
I knew it wasn't lust because the hard times made me want to be with him more. We had great sex but even when that stopped my feelings were the same. "
Love is the person you think of last thing at night and the person you think of first thing in the morning (obviously it really helps if it's the same person) |
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"Inspired by the lovely Estella's thread, how do you know when its love not lust?
My first love was as a teen. I was shy and a bit naive and he was a handsome older guy. Everyone said it was just a crush but I knew it was more because he changed me. He gave me the confidence I was missing and completed me as a person.
I knew it wasn't lust because the hard times made me want to be with him more. We had great sex but even when that stopped my feelings were the same. "
Love is the person you think of last thing at night and the person you think of first thing in the morning (obviously it really helps if it's the same person) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Inspired by the lovely Estella's thread, how do you know when its love not lust?
My first love was as a teen. I was shy and a bit naive and he was a handsome older guy. Everyone said it was just a crush but I knew it was more because he changed me. He gave me the confidence I was missing and completed me as a person.
I knew it wasn't lust because the hard times made me want to be with him more. We had great sex but even when that stopped my feelings were the same.
Love is the person you think of last thing at night and the person you think of first thing in the morning (obviously it really helps if it's the same person) "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's a temporary addiction to specifix activation of the reward centre of your brain, which isn't that dissimilar to the actions of cocaine.
After that, it's hoping that the person who caused it doesn't turn out to be a massive cockwomble |
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