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Cringiest unsexy message you have had
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I encounte_ed the profile of a guy on FLife last night who had commented on a friends picture. I looked at his wall and the stuff he posted on womens pictures were just vile. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got told today my ass was so hot hed let me fart on him  "
If you tell everyone on the forums what I've been sending you one more time, you're going to get a smacked bottom |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got told today my ass was so hot hed let me fart on him
If you tell everyone on the forums what I've been sending you one more time, you're going to get a smacked bottom"
That's what im hoping for  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Messages from total strangers saying they're wanking and want to spunk over my arse.
Wasn't very impressed with the one that asked if I fancied a shag in the back of his van, either. |
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"peng"
The over-exaggerated description of a person with good looks or a nice body or both.
Look at her, she's well peng!!
Sorry I had to google it and find out what it meant - lol!
I'm not sure what;s wrong with 'gorgeous' call me old fashion and that  |
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"I got told today my ass was so hot hed let me fart on him
If you tell everyone on the forums what I've been sending you one more time, you're going to get a smacked bottom
That's what im hoping for "
Your ass is defo spankable though babe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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""peng"
The over-exaggerated description of a person with good looks or a nice body or both.
Look at her, she's well peng!!
Sorry I had to google it and find out what it meant - lol!
I'm not sure what;s wrong with 'gorgeous' call me old fashion and that "
 Id much rather I understood the message! |
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By *yz666Woman
over a year ago
Clacton on sea |
HERE'S SOME FOR YOU:
horny guy wants a gf or wife. msg me if let me Fuck you
Wana hear me wanking?
Fancy some dirty chat? I'm horny as fk with a massive hard on for you x
So you genuine, up for meets, dirty weekends away being explo_ed, used, fucked hard rough and brutal in all your holes?
Same author as above: message header:BRUTAL ROUGH SEX. (WTF?!?)
I don't mind your not experienced, as long as your honest, genuine, and looking to experiment, and adventurous sexually then I am willing to guide you, train you into the sub lifestyle. As your inexperienced and you mentioned your shy I would expect you to be open, I usually have a 5 strikes rule, meaning I expect you to try things 5 times before telling me if you dislike it and want that set as one of your sexual limits.
If you are genuine then message me if you want to take the next step? (I have never spoken to him and any man that needs to be told 'no' five times is a rapist!)
Fancy some dirty bare back sex I can cum in you in the back of my van x
Hi sexy how are your
Fancy letting me fuck you onver the bonnet of my car then lick your pussy while I play with your tits x
I will make you squirt then fuck you hard and deep then cum deep in side you bare back and hold it in till it goes soft while I lick and duck your nipples
Just wanking my horsecock...,U?
i want licking ur pussy
Are you a mother?x (creepy)
you're beautiful! No photo?
I would love to fuck you Bareback and cum inside your pussy...
James xxx (0750 *** 5442)
How are you doing, would you like to meet i would love to fuck and cum multiple times inside your pussy and impregnating you wile kissing and sucking your tongue grabbing your boobs sucking and licking your tits x. Seriously?!? Grabbing boobs and sucking tongues? Impregnating? Why?!?
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By *s_macWoman
over a year ago
Traffic land |
"HERE'S SOME FOR YOU:
horny guy wants a gf or wife. msg me if let me Fuck you
Wana hear me wanking?
Fancy some dirty chat? I'm horny as fk with a massive hard on for you x
So you genuine, up for meets, dirty weekends away being explo_ed, used, fucked hard rough and brutal in all your holes?
Same author as above: message header:BRUTAL ROUGH SEX. (WTF?!?)
I don't mind your not experienced, as long as your honest, genuine, and looking to experiment, and adventurous sexually then I am willing to guide you, train you into the sub lifestyle. As your inexperienced and you mentioned your shy I would expect you to be open, I usually have a 5 strikes rule, meaning I expect you to try things 5 times before telling me if you dislike it and want that set as one of your sexual limits.
If you are genuine then message me if you want to take the next step? (I have never spoken to him and any man that needs to be told 'no' five times is a rapist!)
Fancy some dirty bare back sex I can cum in you in the back of my van x
Hi sexy how are your
Fancy letting me fuck you onver the bonnet of my car then lick your pussy while I play with your tits x
I will make you squirt then fuck you hard and deep then cum deep in side you bare back and hold it in till it goes soft while I lick and duck your nipples
Just wanking my horsecock...,U?
i want licking ur pussy
Are you a mother?x (creepy)
you're beautiful! No photo?
I would love to fuck you Bareback and cum inside your pussy...
James xxx (0750 *** 5442)
How are you doing, would you like to meet i would love to fuck and cum multiple times inside your pussy and impregnating you wile kissing and sucking your tongue grabbing your boobs sucking and licking your tits x. Seriously?!? Grabbing boobs and sucking tongues? Impregnating? Why?!?
"
Ooh, there's some good ones there. The 5 strike rule is horrifying.
Horsecock  |
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"I had one today 'oh you'll squirt when I've done with you'!! Yuk.
Anyone else had a cringey message from a Fabber?
 "
Out of the blue random message:
"I want to see your arse fart."
My, I could barely contain myself. |
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By *rrol.BMan
over a year ago
Wrexham |
"I'm going to make you moist.
Really?
Is that the best you have?
Moist? Really?"
Never set yourself unachievable goals.
If the worst comes to the worst he could always just spritz you with a water spray bottle. |
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By *andDeeCouple
over a year ago
Ashford |
Lol I love this... We have soooo many messages telling me what they'd love to do to me.... And my lovely Husband has great fun answering them all..... Then when he says... What you want my arse and balls sitting on your face they strangely.. Disappear lmao xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had one today 'oh you'll squirt when I've done with you'!! Yuk.
Anyone else had a cringey message from a Fabber?
"
nope although I had a message from a guy who suggested a mobile gloryhole toilet which I wasnt enamo_ed with |
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Referring to a deleted pic... "I would delete that pic if was you mate! Do you really want people to see you fuck a girl with a hairy pussy" sent him a polite reply of "well at least I'm getting some you virgin" |
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It's hard to get half decent messages from the guys here. There are themes that are recurrent, usually involving much of the above, including the aggressive abuse of every hole and inch of my body and soul. That's when they're intelligible.
The late night ones usually entail visiting them as a just about shag - always leave me feeling so grateful for the attention.  |
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By *kmanMan
over a year ago
Letterkenny |
"Feel like ive missed out on some cringe worthy messages
Worst ive had was "i want you to sit on my dick and spin"... Like a helicopter??? "
It did make me burst out laughing at work as I read it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got one the other day that just said:
'Morning Isabella'
(think it was meant for someone else) "
Oh yes! And followed by a full essay on how wonderful I am, how much they want to meet me, date me, marry me. Methinks they forgot to adjust the copy and paste |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"I'd be here all day if I if I backtracked some of the messages I have received over the years "
Oh just thought of a classic corker I received the other day:
have you ever thought about having your nice bum filled with a liquid, like water or milk for example? Have the pleasure to hold it in and when being able to release it squirt it out of your bum like a little fountain?
(Mods, I have tried to change it) But I bet you understand my natural reaction of  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd be here all day if I if I backtracked some of the messages I have received over the years
Oh just thought of a classic corker I received the other day:
have you ever thought about having your nice bum filled with a liquid, like water or milk for example? Have the pleasure to hold it in and when being able to release it squirt it out of your bum like a little fountain?
(Mods, I have tried to change it) But I bet you understand my natural reaction of "
Laughing!
Just a little fountain, mind |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"I'd be here all day if I if I backtracked some of the messages I have received over the years
Oh just thought of a classic corker I received the other day:
have you ever thought about having your nice bum filled with a liquid, like water or milk for example? Have the pleasure to hold it in and when being able to release it squirt it out of your bum like a little fountain?
(Mods, I have tried to change it) But I bet you understand my natural reaction of
Laughing!
Just a little fountain, mind "
Bugger off you
That was strange even by my standards in the 8 years I've been here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am constantly swamped with crude unsexy messages from the fairer sex.
I weaker man would have gave in, but I am a man of unbreakable will and will not give up the goods to the first woman that shows an interest In using me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Before I learnt about filters on here I would often get this from one or two couples.
"I'll let you fuck my wife/gf if I can suck you and make you cum before, she'll be upstairs and you can go up after."
Two things:
A.) I'm not Bi.
B). Do I look like I was born yesterday. |
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""peng"
The over-exaggerated description of a person with good looks or a nice body or both.
Look at her, she's well peng!!
Sorry I had to google it and find out what it meant - lol!
I'm not sure what;s wrong with 'gorgeous' call me old fashion and that "
One syllable too many for todays youth! Let's ignore the fact I fall into that demographic |
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