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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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What's all your views on not being interested in someone on here...?
I'm a very understanding guy, but I find after a certain amount of back and forth, then suddenly silence in a conversation or deleted message after a picture is sent...(which it's usually guys go first) gets really under my skin.
I'll never hassle a person or give them crap for it, but a lot of women, not just on here, ask to be respected in their decision if they aren't interested and/or don't find the other person are what they are looking for.
My problem is, it isn't a "sorry you're not what I'm looking for" it's nothing, silence or deleted messages. Which to me is just as rude as being insulted.
I get you ladies have a LOT of mail to sift through. But the ones that actually make an effort I feel are being painted with the same "piss off you're done" brush, don't we get any respect for who we are either?
Just a thought.....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is a lot that I don't respond to because of many reasons, but the main one is if I were to respond to every message even to say I am not interested, then I would have literally no time for myself.
What annoys me is when people get angry at me for not responding to them and then make bitchy comments in the forums |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is in my eyes ban manners.. but if you have been chatting etc for a while, their circumstances might have changed.. something has cropped up etc? Stone cold silence isn't nice and you do wonder if you've said something out of turn. I try and reply with a 'something's cropped up' message at least.  |
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"What's all your views on not being interested in someone on here...?
I'm a very understanding guy, but I find after a certain amount of back and forth, then suddenly silence in a conversation or deleted message after a picture is sent...(which it's usually guys go first) gets really under my skin.
I'll never hassle a person or give them crap for it, but a lot of women, not just on here, ask to be respected in their decision if they aren't interested and/or don't find the other person are what they are looking for.
My problem is, it isn't a "sorry you're not what I'm looking for" it's nothing, silence or deleted messages. Which to me is just as rude as being insulted.
I get you ladies have a LOT of mail to sift through. But the ones that actually make an effort I feel are being painted with the same "piss off you're done" brush, don't we get any respect for who we are either?
Just a thought..... "
glad you bought this up I was talking to a girl through yes! It's going well. 10 minutes down the line stop talking a drink checked message deleted  heartless cunts some girls are |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Theoretically if an average female receives 150 messages a day and takes 25 seconds to respond to each one, it would take them over an hour of their time to just reply to messages.
God forbid she hits page 1 of hot pics, gets 1000+ messages and then has to dedicate over 7 hours of her day responding to messages...
Do you see how a delete or a no reply is just a smart thing to do now? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If you read the site FAQ's, you will see that it is not considered rude, on fab, to not reply, and non replies should be taken as a 'no thank you'"
Yes I did note that, I'm more so leaning towards someone you've had a convo with and all of a sudden...*poof* you've been disregarded. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Theoretically if an average female receives 150 messages a day and takes 25 seconds to respond to each one, it would take them over an hour of their time to just reply to messages.
God forbid she hits page 1 of hot pics, gets 1000+ messages and then has to dedicate over 7 hours of her day responding to messages...
Do you see how a delete or a no reply is just a smart thing to do now?"
^^^
This is so on point! By the time we've responded to them, we already have responses. It's an endless cycle. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It is in my eyes ban manners.. but if you have been chatting etc for a while, their circumstances might have changed.. something has cropped up etc? Stone cold silence isn't nice and you do wonder if you've said something out of turn. I try and reply with a 'something's cropped up' message at least. "
Unfortunately emotions can't be read through any platform, which I find is one of the hardest things to recover from if you do cock up! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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That I'm completely sympathetic towards, it can be pretty overwhelming I'm sure for you ladies, but as said before it's more so the actual conversations that have been going on for say a week. Then you get deleted out of the blue.
Yes something could have come up sure, but take the 20 secs to let them know they didn't say something out of turn |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think ignoring messages is rude at all. They are complete strangers so having no more contact with a stranger wouldn't affect me in the slightest.
Sometimes Im just not feeling it and fall out of interest. I shouldn't need to give a reason.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Theoretically if an average female receives 150 messages a day and takes 25 seconds to respond to each one, it would take them over an hour of their time to just reply to messages.
God forbid she hits page 1 of hot pics, gets 1000+ messages and then has to dedicate over 7 hours of her day responding to messages...
Do you see how a delete or a no reply is just a smart thing to do now?"
Maybe the average female should learn how to use filters to minimise the amount of messages then |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Common sense you know how many messages woman get more than likely your not the only 1 shes having a conversation with.
Telling you next meet you get tell her to stick her fabswingers on. |
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By *acLe0dMan
over a year ago
Preston |
Of course it is nie to get a thanks but no thanks message. But 99.9% of the time if they aren't interested in you the other party wont reply.
But what about the reverse do the ladies get a reply from every single man they message? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What's all your views on not being interested in someone on here...?
I'm a very understanding guy, but I find after a certain amount of back and forth, then suddenly silence in a conversation or deleted message after a picture is sent...(which it's usually guys go first) gets really under my skin.
I'll never hassle a person or give them crap for it, but a lot of women, not just on here, ask to be respected in their decision if they aren't interested and/or don't find the other person are what they are looking for.
My problem is, it isn't a "sorry you're not what I'm looking for" it's nothing, silence or deleted messages. Which to me is just as rude as being insulted.
I get you ladies have a LOT of mail to sift through. But the ones that actually make an effort I feel are being painted with the same "piss off you're done" brush, don't we get any respect for who we are either?
Just a thought..... "
It's casual sex, who you are is irrelevant, don't expect any respect for whatever you think you are. |
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"That I'm completely sympathetic towards, it can be pretty overwhelming I'm sure for you ladies, but as said before it's more so the actual conversations that have been going on for say a week. Then you get deleted out of the blue.
Yes something could have come up sure, but take the 20 secs to let them know they didn't say something out of turn "
They got bored or you did say something wrong,probably someone else better came along. |
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"Of course it is nie to get a thanks but no thanks message. But 99.9% of the time if they aren't interested in you the other party wont reply.
But what about the reverse do the ladies get a reply from every single man they message?"
I don't generally message men on here,but I do on a dating site and yes I've not alway's had a reply back. It's a shame they don't have a forum in there to have a good old moan once in a while. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This thread will get slaughtered by the usual suspects, re "no one replies" / "just deleted" / or the "we messaged then zero" / forum assassins!
It's harsh, coming from vanilla world.
Polite "knockback" niceties, are rare on here.
They do happen, but the ratio of men to women, means it's far easier for online fab females, to act, just how they like.
Being on fabs, isn't an automatic "yes" to any interest, which is the obvious response, you'll likely cop to this thread!
People behave far differently online than they'd expect to be treated in the real world.
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By *AA123Couple
over a year ago
Lichfield |
Just had the same guy on a new account getting arsey about us not replying. His conversations on his first account were complete gibberish and he was demanding we reply. He also seemed to get confused and suggested not replying to him was a reportable offence.
His second account recently opened was no different.
And you wonder why people don't reply? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was taught if you have nothing nice to say dont say anything at all.. so thats why i dont reply "
This ^^ if we've been conversing and I don't reply it's generally because the previous message didn't warrant a reply or because if I say what I'm thinking someone is going to end up properly offended so I keep my mouth shut  |
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By *wcwCouple
over a year ago
cheshire |
Does it matter if ya get a reply or not. If not. Ya move on. Its so obvious they dont want awt to do with you. Does it realy matter. Why shud someone go out of there way to txt back anything. They didnt ask for it. Just move on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have found that sometimes after a few messages exchanged, they might say something that puts me off, or It might just feel a bit 'flat' and not something which I might want to take further.
As harsh as it may feel, sometimes it's better to just let it die off.
In my experience on here, it is difficult to explain that and most guys, not all, would then start questioning why, and possibly even throwing the 'time waster' label about.
Sometimes things just tail off and don't go anywhere.
It is important to remember that for every message you are sending her, she is probably getting another 5 or 10 at roughly the same time too. If you end up not being what she wants there is sadly nothing you can do. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just had the same guy on a new account getting arsey about us not replying. His conversations on his first account were complete gibberish and he was demanding we reply. He also seemed to get confused and suggested not replying to him was a reportable offence.
His second account recently opened was no different.
And you wonder why people don't reply?"
Seriously?!
There really are some brain dead fukwits on here |
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By *AA123Couple
over a year ago
Lichfield |
"I was taught if you have nothing nice to say dont say anything at all.. so thats why i dont reply
This ^^ if we've been conversing and I don't reply it's generally because the previous message didn't warrant a reply or because if I say what I'm thinking someone is going to end up properly offended so I keep my mouth shut "
Agreed. There's not much to reply to when you just get 'Lol' |
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"What's all your views on not being interested in someone on here...?
I'm a very understanding guy, but I find after a certain amount of back and forth, then suddenly silence in a conversation or deleted message after a picture is sent...(which it's usually guys go first) gets really under my skin.
I'll never hassle a person or give them crap for it, but a lot of women, not just on here, ask to be respected in their decision if they aren't interested and/or don't find the other person are what they are looking for.
My problem is, it isn't a "sorry you're not what I'm looking for" it's nothing, silence or deleted messages. Which to me is just as rude as being insulted.
I get you ladies have a LOT of mail to sift through. But the ones that actually make an effort I feel are being painted with the same "piss off you're done" brush, don't we get any respect for who we are either?
Just a thought..... "
After being hassled with 200 or more "but why not" messages you come to the conclusion not to message people back! Its a problem for men created by the actions of other men simple as that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't want the humiliation of someone I've been chatting to to say 'sorry you're not for me'. I'd rather they quietly slip away and leave me with my dignity.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it's easy to be too sensitive on here, it's natural you'll be rejected and possibly quite brutally...I wouldn't treat someone like that, but it is par for the course |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's just one of those things that you have to deal with. It happens to us all. I don't get it so much on here, but when I was on dating sites, it'd happen constantly. Breathe, smile and move on! |
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By *vetteBondTV/TS
over a year ago
English Riviera |
Most guys can't be bothered to read my profile in the first place so I don't see why I should be bothered to reply.
Guys that do peek my interest and strike up a covo with usually end up putting their foot in their mouth over summit and I just think meh delete on to the next!
Could well be considered a bit rude from the other party but I don't know them or asked them to contact me so I just don't care!
But in the interest of parity there are some lovely engaging guys here too and you make it all worth while x
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