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Bars open!!
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"Whoop whoop yes please A baileys " on the rocks madam  | |||
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"Please. Bubbles for me" coming up gorgeous | |||
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"Vodka and lemonade please x" there you go madam enjoy   | |||
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"Blue bols with ice please And a drink for yourself" coming up!well thankyou sir I will have a twisted nippel if that's ok | |||
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"Single malt. Chop chop!" on the rocks !! Coming up | |||
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"Bit early so small Highland Park please." there you go sir enjoy | |||
"Single malt. Chop chop!on the rocks !! Coming up "Bollocks to rocks! Bloody savage. Straight up and get a wriggle on. Oh and one for yourself sexy. | |||
"Whiskey sour please x" as sour or salty as you like madam | |||
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"Single malt. Chop chop!on the rocks !! Coming up
Bollocks to rocks! Bloody savage. Straight up and get a wriggle on. Oh and one for yourself sexy. "coming up thankyou gorgeous | |||
"Whiskey sour please xas sour or salty as you like madam "I happen to like salty stuff!! Lol xx | |||
"Champers for me please " a bottle coming up save a glass for me I will be over in a min | |||
"Pint of creme De menthe please" have this on me,sorry for the delay | |||
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"I have a glass of rosé Prosecco thank you "with pleasure madam | |||
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"I wouldn't mind something salty to go with my Prosecco "salty nuts madam? | |||
"I wouldn't mind something salty to go with my Prosecco salty nuts madam? "No, but my vagina is a bit sticky
Got any crisps? | |||
"Champers for me please a bottle coming up save a glass for me I will be over in a min "You better be quick... | |||
"I wouldn't mind something salty to go with my Prosecco salty nuts madam?
No, but my vagina is a bit sticky
Got any crisps?"prawn cocktail? | |||
"Pint of creme De menthe pleasehave this on me,sorry for the delay "About time service in here is atrocious | |||
"Champers for me please a bottle coming up save a glass for me I will be over in a min
You better be quick... "have another on me,won't be long!keeps her quiet and trots off to his other fancy bit at the other end of the pub | |||
"I wouldn't mind something salty to go with my Prosecco salty nuts madam?
No, but my vagina is a bit sticky
Got any crisps?prawn cocktail? "sorry madam had to resolve a little issue with the bubbly | |||
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"I wouldn't mind something salty to go with my Prosecco salty nuts madam?
No, but my vagina is a bit sticky
Got any crisps?prawn cocktail? "More like Scampi. Cheese and onion crisps please | |||
"Do you have any steak flavoured McCoys ?" steak and Stilton!! | |||
"I wouldn't mind something salty to go with my Prosecco salty nuts madam?
No, but my vagina is a bit sticky
Got any crisps?prawn cocktail? sorry madam had to resolve a little issue with the bubbly "Was it off? Cheap stuff  | |||
"I wouldn't mind something salty to go with my Prosecco salty nuts madam?
No, but my vagina is a bit sticky
Got any crisps?prawn cocktail?
More like Scampi. Cheese and onion crisps please "here you go madam have a slippery nippy on me | |||
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"I wouldn't mind something salty to go with my Prosecco salty nuts madam?
No, but my vagina is a bit sticky
Got any crisps?prawn cocktail? sorry madam had to resolve a little issue with the bubbly
Was it off? Cheap stuff "nah just needed spicing up a little | |||
"Champers for me please a bottle coming up save a glass for me I will be over in a min
You better be quick... have another on me,won't be long!keeps her quiet and trots off to his other fancy bit at the other end of the pub "Oh, you hussy! | |||
"I'll have a nice cold Pinot Grigio please x " a nice cold one on its way up my lovely | |||
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"Bourbon straight please.. " of course have this bottle on me and a little nibble for you guys to enjoy,if there is anything else I can do for you just ask | |||
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grabs a bottle of brandy on his way down | |||
"Something very strong with a kick.. Moscow mule please " here you go my sweetheart I will be back in a sec | |||
"I'll have a nice cold Pinot Grigio please x a nice cold one on its way up my lovely "Ooo, hello handsome | |||
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"Just popping down the cellar to show my new barmaid the rope,if someone doesn't mind stepping in for a sec I will sort you out on my return grabs a bottle of brandy on his way down "You did ask for someone to look after the bar
Buxom barmaid here to help | |||
"Just popping down the cellar to show my new barmaid the rope,if someone doesn't mind stepping in for a sec I will sort you out on my return grabs a bottle of brandy on his way down
You did ask for someone to look after the bar
Buxom barmaid here to help "ok I will give you four hours trial but if you don't meet my punters needs your on cellar duty!! | |||
"Just popping down the cellar to show my new barmaid the rope,if someone doesn't mind stepping in for a sec I will sort you out on my return grabs a bottle of brandy on his way down
You did ask for someone to look after the bar
Buxom barmaid here to help ok I will give you four hours trial but if you don't meet my punters needs your on cellar duty!! " | |||
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"Bloody Mary Please! "With plenty of Tabasco..... hot & spicy | |||
"Bloody Mary Please!
With plenty of Tabasco..... hot & spicy "Absolutely Risqué!  | |||
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"Martin millers with rose lemonade please "On its way enjoy | |||
"Bloody Mary Please! "One bloody Mary | |||
"A pint of Harp be very welcome at this moment "A pint of harp. Straight or handled glass? | |||
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"Diet Coke please, I'm back to work tomorrow "Diet Ice and slice? | |||
"vodka please barman "Vodka ice? And I'm a lady  | |||
ohhhh that's a nice new girl behind the bar | |||
"After doing what I just done I need a very large stiff one, double Highland Park please!" Sorry for your wait I had to find the Highland Park | |||
"vodka please barman
Vodka ice? And I'm a lady "My apologies! Just neat thanks! | |||
"vodka please barman
Vodka ice? And I'm a lady
My apologies! Just neat thanks! "here you go sir enjoy | |||
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"vodka please barman
Vodka ice? And I'm a lady
My apologies! Just neat thanks! "I thought the boobs we a giveaway | |||
"I'm on the Anciano Crianza and Tempranillo I was given by my sister-in-law for Xmas. It's actually rather pleasant "you can't bring your own drinks in here madam without my approval,please step into my office and bring your bottle and we can have a little chat | |||
"I'm on the Anciano Crianza and Tempranillo I was given by my sister-in-law for Xmas. It's actually rather pleasant you can't bring your own drinks in here madam without my approval,please step into my office and bring your bottle and we can have a little chat "Ooh err - first time I've been mistaken for a woman. | |||
"I'm on the Anciano Crianza and Tempranillo I was given by my sister-in-law for Xmas. It's actually rather pleasant you can't bring your own drinks in here madam without my approval,please step into my office and bring your bottle and we can have a little chat
Ooh err - first time I've been mistaken for a woman. "ive just noticed that lmfao  | |||
"I'm on the Anciano Crianza and Tempranillo I was given by my sister-in-law for Xmas. It's actually rather pleasant you can't bring your own drinks in here madam without my approval,please step into my office and bring your bottle and we can have a little chat
Ooh err - first time I've been mistaken for a woman. "He's been helping himself to the optics | |||
"I'm on the Anciano Crianza and Tempranillo I was given by my sister-in-law for Xmas. It's actually rather pleasant you can't bring your own drinks in here madam without my approval,please step into my office and bring your bottle and we can have a little chat
Ooh err - first time I've been mistaken for a woman. ive just noticed that lmfao "You're ok gorgeous Mwahh | |||
"After doing what I just done I need a very large stiff one, double Highland Park please! Sorry for your wait I had to find the Highland Park " You're a woman! | |||
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"I'm on the Anciano Crianza and Tempranillo I was given by my sister-in-law for Xmas. It's actually rather pleasant you can't bring your own drinks in here madam without my approval,please step into my office and bring your bottle and we can have a little chat
Ooh err - first time I've been mistaken for a woman. ive just noticed that lmfao
You're ok gorgeous Mwahh" | |||
"Diet Coke please, I'm back to work tomorrow
Diet Ice and slice? "Yes please | |||
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"Fed up with Champers, drambuie for me please " of course madam,I've just got to pick a bottle up from the cellar I won't be long | |||
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"After doing what I just done I need a very large stiff one, double Highland Park please! Sorry for your wait I had to find the Highland Park You're a woman!" Well I was last time I looked | |||
"G&T please, slice no ice x" G and t no ice x | |||
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"Something cold and Pink please?" just out of the cellar madam,your wish is my command | |||
"Get off the f.....g pool table!!! "You told me to get ON it last night... make your effin mind up!! | |||
"G&T please, slice no ice x G and t no ice x" Heavy on the G, not so much on the T | |||
"G&T please, slice no ice x G and t no ice x Heavy on the G, not so much on the T "As you wish | |||
"Something cold and Pink please?just out of the cellar madam,your wish is my command "Or you can get back on the cellar while I grab Honey and dance on the tables!! | |||
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"Something cold and Pink please?" Raspberry mojoti? | |||
"I have a gin and elderflower please" Would you like a large one? | |||
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"Southern comfort on the rocks " my pleasure,nuts with that madam | |||
"I have a gin and elderflower please Would you like a large one? " Yep...large bowl glass | |||
"Southern comfort on the rocks my pleasure,nuts with that madam "Oh yes please love nuts | |||
"I have a gin and elderflower please Would you like a large one? Yep...large bowl glass" here you go my lovely,have it on me | |||
"Barmaid step into my office please "What have I done? | |||
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"Southern comfort on the rocks my pleasure,nuts with that madam
Oh yes please love nuts "salted or roasted | |||
"Southern comfort on the rocks my pleasure,nuts with that madam
Oh yes please love nuts salted or roasted "Salted | |||
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"Barmaid step into my office please
What have I done? "can someone hold the fort for an age please ,just got to show one of my staff the rope in the cellar | |||
"Barmaid step into my office please
What have I done? can someone hold the fort for an age please ,just got to show one of my staff the rope in the cellar " | |||
"Bit girly for a guy but been on rhubarb gin and fever tree tonic tonight, absolutely loved it. Had a few blue moon beers to start of with (which is beer with orange slices in it) ever so slightly pissed but both drinks contained fruit so deffo part or my five a day! "have a grape on me | |||
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"Hello.... Still waiting for wine here!! "Terribly sorry for the delay a bottle of red for the lady | |||
"Hello.... Still waiting for wine here!!
Terribly sorry for the delay a bottle of red for the lady "I was somewhat tied up  | |||
"Hello.... Still waiting for wine here!! "walking past and gets this complaint im really sorry madam,I've got a private bar with a lovely inviting hot tub up stairs would you like a little bit more privacy up there? | |||
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"Thank you.... It's just been one of those days... Goes off to sit in usual corner.... "are you ready to go upstairs madam | |||
"may I have a refill please... " One g&t heavy on the gin coming up | |||
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"may I have a refill please... " of course madam,would you like a tour of my pub? | |||
"Yes total today lol" I'm sorry sir didn't quiet catch what you wanted. | |||
"Yes total today lol I'm sorry sir didn't quiet catch what you wanted. " | |||
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"may I have a refill please... One g&t heavy on the gin coming up " I see the "manager" is leaving you to do all the work. Hope you will be heavily recompensed | |||
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"may I have a refill please... One g&t heavy on the gin coming up I see the "manager" is leaving you to do all the work. Hope you will be heavily recompensed " | |||
"may I have a refill please... One g&t heavy on the gin coming up I see the "manager" is leaving you to do all the work. Hope you will be heavily recompensed "I think my trial shift is over now. | |||
"may I have a refill please... of course madam,would you like a tour of my pub? "only if you can carry me upstairs.... fireman's lift will do | |||
"southern comfort please" Would you like ice? | |||
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"yes please" Southern comfort and ice for you | |||
"may I have a refill please... of course madam,would you like a tour of my pub?
only if you can carry me upstairs.... fireman's lift will do "gets her on my balaster and pulls her with my rope | |||
"A Baileys and fanta for me please." One baileys with ice? One Fanta ice with that? | |||
"may I have a refill please... of course madam,would you like a tour of my pub?
only if you can carry me upstairs.... fireman's lift will do gets her on my balaster and pulls her with my rope "whitt? you've no got a Stenna?? Exactly what type of establishment is this? | |||
"Thank you.... It's just been one of those days... Goes off to sit in usual corner.... "hot tub is ready for you now madam | |||
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"Good night ladies and gentlemen my trial shift is over. Enjoy your Evening " your hired xxx | |||
"Yes total today lol I'm sorry sir didn't quiet catch what you wanted. " tea totaly tea please .... | |||
"Yes total today lol I'm sorry sir didn't quiet catch what you wanted. tea totaly tea please .... "here you go sir.would you like a scone with that? | |||
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"LAST ORDERS PLEASE "Drinks all round you gave me the job | |||
"LAST ORDERS PLEASE
Drinks all round you gave me the job " | |||
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"Strawberry daiquiri please Sir" only drinks in my private quarters now madam | |||
"Yes total today lol I'm sorry sir didn't quiet catch what you wanted. tea totaly tea please .... here you go sir.would you like a scone with that? "cake!! I do like to have my cake and eat it... | |||
pours a swift one and staggers up to the hot tub | |||
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