FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Anyone else...?
Anyone else...?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I hear you. Women get alot of messages and the guys are kind enough to send face pics.. but if you do reply they want to chat with you so I prefer to say right away that they are not what I am looking for.
Honesty is the best policy.
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"No need to feel guilty. You don't owe anyone a response "
If only all men felt this way!
OP yes I do feel guilty deleting if the guy has obviously read my profile. I have recently started replying to them with 'thank you for your message but no thanks' and rarely get them trying their luck.
I don't feel any guilt in deleting a message from someone who couldn't be bothered reading my profile. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here! "
No as I have my filters set high as Im a grumpy bastard |
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yep. same. sometimes when people are far away I get carried away and start a chat and am really stuck when then then offer to travel. feels like you are horrible andas if you thought you were something better although it simply is as it is- you are attracted or you are not... |
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"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here! " If you are more specific with filters maybe you won't get so many messages. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes, I feel bad. But I'd be doing them a greater disservice by engaging. I tend to solely 'friend-only chat' with people on the forum that I've become friendlier with, so anyone else approaching who I'm not attracted to, I would delete. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a bit like going out on the pull so to speak . You don't talk to everyone in the pub or club, just the ones you feel attracted to."
Yes, but the question was about 'replying' to an initial question/conversation.
In a pub, if a guy tried to talk to you, would you honestly not even say anything at all - not even a 'no' of 'piss off'??
To OP:
It'd be nice if everyone could be honest and politely say "I'm not interested, sorry", however, I do appreciate when single women get hundreds of messages, there just isn't time to reply to everyone!
People with at least half a brain and respect for others soon learn how it works on here, and don't take it too personally when getting no response or deleted/blocked.
Summary; in an ideal world you'd give everyone a reply, but don't feel bad for not doing so |
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By *aggersMan
over a year ago
portsmouth |
"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here! "
No need to apologise?!? If your Nat attracted then your not attracted most guys get the no replying thing |
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"No need to feel guilty. You don't owe anyone a response
If only all men felt this way!
OP yes I do feel guilty deleting if the guy has obviously read my profile. I have recently started replying to them with 'thank you for your message but no thanks' "
We appreciate this over just being ignored |
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By *aggersMan
over a year ago
portsmouth |
"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here!
No need to apologise?!? If your Nat attracted then your not attracted most guys get the no replying thing "
*not* bloody auto correct |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Same here, especially when they sound pleasant and have taken the trouble to send an interesting, well written message.
In the same vein I often don't Fab pics because I know the guy will then try and engage me in conversation |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No need to feel guilty. You don't owe anyone a response
If only all men felt this way!
OP yes I do feel guilty deleting if the guy has obviously read my profile. I have recently started replying to them with 'thank you for your message but no thanks'
We appreciate this over just being ignored "
in an ideal world,most women,i imagine, would reply with a polite no thank you....but once you've had a few abusive ones back, or after trying to be polite, follow up 'why nots?'..it beomes clear its easier to just delete i'm afraid..even though,yes,sometimes,if its a nice message,i do feel bad...but once bitten... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here! "
Well speaking Personaly,i really appreciate your situation and that sometimes you might feel a twinge of guilt
It's a given that no reply means not interested, but as you said in the op,some guys have made a real effort with their message, and aren't unpleasant in any way, there just not for you
Ive experienced the, delete /unread so many times and wondered if the person i contacted even looked, or did and thought about before acting
I really like the fact that its something you think about, and wish others might do as well, yes i get the its members privilege to do whatever they want with an unsolicited approach, but out of hand rejection still hurts no matter what
Thank you for being considerate of others feelings,you seem like a lovely person, i wish you well on here |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Don't feel guilty OP, I do it all the time; in fact I'm sure I've delete a few of yours - thought you would've got the hint by now!"
Damn! It's ok I'm not offended (runs off proverbial tail between legs) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Pah, I'm currently having a wank over obscure jazz-funk .zip files and Gilad Atzmon tour dates...I take what I can get!"
Haha! You wait I've got some good funk soul in store! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here!
No as I have my filters set high as Im a grumpy bastard "
I thought Jesus loved everyone? Illusions shattered. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No need to feel guilty. You don't owe anyone a response
If only all men felt this way!
OP yes I do feel guilty deleting if the guy has obviously read my profile. I have recently started replying to them with 'thank you for your message but no thanks' and rarely get them trying their luck.
I don't feel any guilt in deleting a message from someone who couldn't be bothered reading my profile."
Oh yes I'm with you, the copy and paste stands out a mile! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"yep. same. sometimes when people are far away I get carried away and start a chat and am really stuck when then then offer to travel. feels like you are horrible andas if you thought you were something better although it simply is as it is- you are attracted or you are not..."
Sometimes when in a boring situation like waiting for a train or something I've conversed with guys I had no attraction to just though boredom. Awful isn't it! |
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I always reply to messages it's only polite when someone has taken the trouble to send one. However it's content dictates the type of response and the level of sarcasm used. If the initial message is appropriate I'll send a friendly no and we would invariably then have a brief chat. Even say hi every now and again, works for me I like a chat lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yes, I feel bad. But I'd be doing them a greater disservice by engaging. I tend to solely 'friend-only chat' with people on the forum that I've become friendlier with, so anyone else approaching who I'm not attracted to, I would delete. "
You're right - it is a waste of their time too. |
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When I send a rejection email then I don't feel guilty but I can feel a bit hard or unfriendly.
When I receive one (if they haven't blocked me) I tend to reply with a 'thanks for the reply, all the best' type email. If they then engage further with chit chat that's up to them and I will follow suit, but if not then that's the end of it.
I don't have any ill feeling towards people who don't reply (they have no requirement to), but I guess I do feel that those who mail to reject are a bit more 'human' as I try to do that myself. I do accept though that I get many many fewer messages than the ladies so it's easier for me to do so. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Pah, I'm currently having a wank over obscure jazz-funk .zip files and Gilad Atzmon tour dates...I take what I can get!
Haha! You wait I've got some good funk soul in store! "
Ration it, I'll get a sore cock! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's a bit like going out on the pull so to speak . You don't talk to everyone in the pub or club, just the ones you feel attracted to.
Yes, but the question was about 'replying' to an initial question/conversation.
In a pub, if a guy tried to talk to you, would you honestly not even say anything at all - not even a 'no' of 'piss off'??
To OP:
It'd be nice if everyone could be honest and politely say "I'm not interested, sorry", however, I do appreciate when single women get hundreds of messages, there just isn't time to reply to everyone!
People with at least half a brain and respect for others soon learn how it works on here, and don't take it too personally when getting no response or deleted/blocked.
Summary; in an ideal world you'd give everyone a reply, but don't feel bad for not doing so "
thanks! Good to be reassured I'm not perceived as a total bitch by the whole of Fab! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Same here, especially when they sound pleasant and have taken the trouble to send an interesting, well written message.
In the same vein I often don't Fab pics because I know the guy will then try and engage me in conversation "
Another good call! Only fab pics when I'm interested in the guy. |
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Instead of having to type out lots of responses; maybe Fab could add a "sorry not interested" option. There is such a facility on a certain BDSM site about collars and space.
No I'm not naming it; I made a silly mistake and got a ban for mentioning a site for retro lingerie - in a thread on that exact topic last week.
Anyway, I do have a profile on that certain unnamed BDSM site too. If you're interested, and you'd like to know more; drop me a message. |
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"Yes, I feel bad. But I'd be doing them a greater disservice by engaging. I tend to solely 'friend-only chat' with people on the forum that I've become friendlier with, so anyone else approaching who I'm not attracted to, I would delete.
You're right - it is a waste of their time too. "
They don't all consider it a waste of time, providing they know you're not wanting to meet they sometimes still like to have a chat |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here!
Well speaking Personaly,i really appreciate your situation and that sometimes you might feel a twinge of guilt
It's a given that no reply means not interested, but as you said in the op,some guys have made a real effort with their message, and aren't unpleasant in any way, there just not for you
Ive experienced the, delete /unread so many times and wondered if the person i contacted even looked, or did and thought about before acting
I really like the fact that its something you think about, and wish others might do as well, yes i get the its members privilege to do whatever they want with an unsolicited approach, but out of hand rejection still hurts no matter what
Thank you for being considerate of others feelings,you seem like a lovely person, i wish you well on here "
Thank you for your well wishes and I'm sure others are the same in their twinges of guilt! |
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"
Sometimes when in a boring situation like waiting for a train or something I've conversed with guys I had no attraction to just though boredom. Awful isn't it!"
It is awful I agree, guys are just the same...... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Instead of having to type out lots of responses; maybe Fab could add a "sorry not interested" option. There is such a facility on a certain BDSM site about collars and space.
No I'm not naming it; I made a silly mistake and got a ban for mentioning a site for retro lingerie - in a thread on that exact topic last week.
Anyway, I do have a profile on that certain unnamed BDSM site too. If you're interested, and you'd like to know more; drop me a message. "
I've posted the idea of a not interested option before, know it's not ideal, but it might be a happy medium for some who don't want to go straight to the delete option? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here! "
You were polite to me and said you were not attracted, a quick response was very much appreciated and unfortunately you won't get to find out how amazing I am... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I always reply to messages it's only polite when someone has taken the trouble to send one. However it's content dictates the type of response and the level of sarcasm used. If the initial message is appropriate I'll send a friendly no and we would invariably then have a brief chat. Even say hi every now and again, works for me I like a chat lol " I have a standard 'no' reply to send to most, others it's just not appropriate to send it to, as they may not have even asked me directly if I'm interested in them, seems presumptuous of me to assume they are, even though they probably wouldn't message if they weren't - ha! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yes, I feel bad. But I'd be doing them a greater disservice by engaging. I tend to solely 'friend-only chat' with people on the forum that I've become friendlier with, so anyone else approaching who I'm not attracted to, I would delete.
You're right - it is a waste of their time too.
They don't all consider it a waste of time, providing they know you're not wanting to meet they sometimes still like to have a chat "
Yes there's a few I chat to with no intentions, nice that not all guys on here immediately think with their cocks |
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"I always reply to messages it's only polite when someone has taken the trouble to send one. However it's content dictates the type of response and the level of sarcasm used. If the initial message is appropriate I'll send a friendly no and we would invariably then have a brief chat. Even say hi every now and again, works for me I like a chat lol I have a standard 'no' reply to send to most, others it's just not appropriate to send it to, as they may not have even asked me directly if I'm interested in them, seems presumptuous of me to assume they are, even though they probably wouldn't message if they weren't - ha!"
I'm no expert here but it's a pretty safe bet an unsolicited message means he's interested lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I always reply to messages it's only polite when someone has taken the trouble to send one. However it's content dictates the type of response and the level of sarcasm used. If the initial message is appropriate I'll send a friendly no and we would invariably then have a brief chat. Even say hi every now and again, works for me I like a chat lol I have a standard 'no' reply to send to most, others it's just not appropriate to send it to, as they may not have even asked me directly if I'm interested in them, seems presumptuous of me to assume they are, even though they probably wouldn't message if they weren't - ha!
I'm no expert here but it's a pretty safe bet an unsolicited message means he's interested lol "
I got messages when I first joined, before my first pics were even approved, seems to devalue that 'interested' factor slightly. You're female? He's interested! Haha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Great thread and good to see we are all wrestling with our own small parts of this lifestyle, (not that I've got a small part, just saying )and based on another thread I was on yesterday that auto-corrected to "smell-part" gets worse!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Great thread and good to see we are all wrestling with our own small parts of this lifestyle, (not that I've got a small part, just saying )and based on another thread I was on yesterday that auto-corrected to "smell-part" gets worse!
"
Sniffs the air... takes out tape measure... |
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"I always reply to messages it's only polite when someone has taken the trouble to send one. However it's content dictates the type of response and the level of sarcasm used. If the initial message is appropriate I'll send a friendly no and we would invariably then have a brief chat. Even say hi every now and again, works for me I like a chat lol I have a standard 'no' reply to send to most, others it's just not appropriate to send it to, as they may not have even asked me directly if I'm interested in them, seems presumptuous of me to assume they are, even though they probably wouldn't message if they weren't - ha!
I'm no expert here but it's a pretty safe bet an unsolicited message means he's interested lol
I got messages when I first joined, before my first pics were even approved, seems to devalue that 'interested' factor slightly. You're female? He's interested! Haha"
So you think guys only message just because you're a woman if you don't have pics? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I always reply to messages it's only polite when someone has taken the trouble to send one. However it's content dictates the type of response and the level of sarcasm used. If the initial message is appropriate I'll send a friendly no and we would invariably then have a brief chat. Even say hi every now and again, works for me I like a chat lol I have a standard 'no' reply to send to most, others it's just not appropriate to send it to, as they may not have even asked me directly if I'm interested in them, seems presumptuous of me to assume they are, even though they probably wouldn't message if they weren't - ha!
I'm no expert here but it's a pretty safe bet an unsolicited message means he's interested lol
I got messages when I first joined, before my first pics were even approved, seems to devalue that 'interested' factor slightly. You're female? He's interested! Haha
So you think guys only message just because you're a woman if you don't have pics? "
I think there are one or two gamblers on here yep definitely! |
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"Instead of having to type out lots of responses; maybe Fab could add a "sorry not interested" option. There is such a facility on a certain BDSM site about collars and space.
No I'm not naming it; I made a silly mistake and got a ban for mentioning a site for retro lingerie - in a thread on that exact topic last week.
Anyway, I do have a profile on that certain unnamed BDSM site too. If you're interested, and you'd like to know more; drop me a message.
I've posted the idea of a not interested option before, know it's not ideal, but it might be a happy medium for some who don't want to go straight to the delete option? "
Yep. That's what I thought Dave. Aw well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would reply to a woman profile if it enticed me even without pics, pics are only one part of the make-up
You do need to know if the physicality is there as well but not always straight away ! |
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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago
.. |
I do feel bad if I don't manage to reply so I do try to reply to them all but sometimes that's just not possible.
The only ones I delete quite happily are rude, crude, meet me now type of messages. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I would reply to a woman profile if it enticed me even without pics, pics are only one part of the make-up
You do need to know if the physicality is there as well but not always straight away !"
True! Sometimes words can really entice. |
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"I always reply to messages it's only polite when someone has taken the trouble to send one. However it's content dictates the type of response and the level of sarcasm used. If the initial message is appropriate I'll send a friendly no and we would invariably then have a brief chat. Even say hi every now and again, works for me I like a chat lol I have a standard 'no' reply to send to most, others it's just not appropriate to send it to, as they may not have even asked me directly if I'm interested in them, seems presumptuous of me to assume they are, even though they probably wouldn't message if they weren't - ha!
I'm no expert here but it's a pretty safe bet an unsolicited message means he's interested lol
I got messages when I first joined, before my first pics were even approved, seems to devalue that 'interested' factor slightly. You're female? He's interested! Haha
So you think guys only message just because you're a woman if you don't have pics?
I think there are one or two gamblers on here yep definitely! "
Of course there are that's the nature of the site but they will find you regardless of pics and so will the ones you want to attract! I know men are visual creatures but some are also gifted with an imagination and can be intrigued enough by your profile to message |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No you shouldn't feel guilty about not replying. The choice of who you speak to on here and you who you meet is completely your choice and nobody else's
Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If someone's sent me a lovely message, I do try and respond. Even just to say that I don't feel we're right for each other. It's the short and not-so-sweet ones that I straight out delete. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have been a couple and a single and the one liners, not even text in main body, are just lazy and a waste of keyboard time by the sender.
Saying that I have crafted what I believe are works of art only to see them dumped in the delete bin, we are all different that's what makes the lifestyle so enjoyable ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not in the slightest, no matter how much effort I put into a message if my pictures don't appeal why should I expect her to waste her time replying. Especially as the forums abound with stories of guys becoming abusive if rejected.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I get a 'No thanks' reply, I have to admit I'm guilty of replying, but purely with a "No worries, thanks for the reply, happy fabbing" kind of response.
I'm not everyone's cup of tea, and I know even that is wasting a woman's time, but I guess I'm just polite |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Always take the time to say I'm interested or not. Only takes a few seconds to reply with a sorry your not my type x"
Yeah but then it takes another god knows how long explaining why theyre not your type, declining their offer to prove they have skills, getting abuse and further attempts to get your attention.
I totally understand not all guys do it but there are some who do and it makes me wary because I dont want to find out! |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
OP you should never feel guilty for not replying to messages no matter how "un-nice" that might seem, someone said to me recently that she'd had to toughen up a little on here and I can understand why having seen/heard about the volume of messages and content that solo ladies accounts can get.
It's your profile and you should run it how you want and if that means resorting to the site standard of "no reply means no thanks" (as laid out in FAQs) then you shouldn't feel bad about it. |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
I used to feel like that OP. Now I occasionally put 'if it's obvious you haven't read my profile your message will be deleted' or something. Just because it's so time consuming and like you say if you reply some guys see that as a green light to chat! |
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"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
"
Haha, me too - nice enough, but nothing to COMPEL me to reply, which is what it takes on here most of the time nowadays!! Evidence of wit is the most likely successful 'bait' I have to say lol! |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
Sorry, i did not want to reply to your request for sex because my inbox has hundreds of similar requests.
But here i am, sending this message to you on the hope that;
1) You will not message me back asking why or why not.
2) You are not an entitled prick who will give me abuse for being polite and letting you know you are not attractive to me in any form whatsoever.
3) You will not take my reply as some invitation to chat with you just because you are
3i) bored,
3ii) deperate,
3iii) oblivious to my reluctance to interact with you because i have manners.
Please do not reply to me, especially not with abuse.
Hope someone else wets your dick for you coz i couldn't give 2 shits.
Bye. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here! "
Don't feel guilty. ...apparently it's fab rules. It's not nice but it's how is played on here. I use that same rule but on its head. If i don't get a reply after 2 days or ive seen its been read I block them. Saves wasting each other's time in the future.
So don't feel guilty. It's annoying if time is spent on a nice personal message but it's how fab plays it....possibly why alot only a quick short message to get the initial attention to look at your profile. If not interested it's all the same result at the end. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
Haha, me too - nice enough, but nothing to COMPEL me to reply, which is what it takes on here most of the time nowadays!! Evidence of wit is the most likely successful 'bait' I have to say lol! "
Yes! This is my feeling exactly, being compelled to reply!! That's what gets me interested. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Sorry, i did not want to reply to your request for sex because my inbox has hundreds of similar requests.
But here i am, sending this message to you on the hope that;
1) You will not message me back asking why or why not.
2) You are not an entitled prick who will give me abuse for being polite and letting you know you are not attractive to me in any form whatsoever.
3) You will not take my reply as some invitation to chat with you just because you are
3i) bored,
3ii) deperate,
3iii) oblivious to my reluctance to interact with you because i have manners.
Please do not reply to me, especially not with abuse.
Hope someone else wets your dick for you coz i couldn't give 2 shits.
Bye."
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sorry, i did not want to reply to your request for sex because my inbox has hundreds of similar requests.
But here i am, sending this message to you on the hope that;
1) You will not message me back asking why or why not.
2) You are not an entitled prick who will give me abuse for being polite and letting you know you are not attractive to me in any form whatsoever.
3) You will not take my reply as some invitation to chat with you just because you are
3i) bored,
3ii) deperate,
3iii) oblivious to my reluctance to interact with you because i have manners.
Please do not reply to me, especially not with abuse.
Hope someone else wets your dick for you coz i couldn't give 2 shits.
Bye."
But you clearly state you don't meet single guys....so no need to reply lol. |
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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago
in the eye of the storm |
"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here! "
yes oh god yes the hardest thing about this internet fuckery is having to turn people down because anyone with half a brain cell knows it can cause others to question there self worth and cause a negative feeling where none is intended .
but what is one to do but try to be nice when one has to say no thanks and to not ignore those one has turned is another good way of helping them to realise it wasn't personal just lack a of sexual chemistry not a slight on them as a human being . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
110% if there was such a thing! Thats why I always try and reply and be honest. Spoke to a lovely couple who ticked wvery box the other day. We swapped pictures and I just was not attracted. I explained and was promptly blocked. I hope they wasnt offended as attraction is very personal.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here! " |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"Sorry, i did not want to reply to your request for sex because my inbox has hundreds of similar requests.
But here i am, sending this message to you on the hope that;
1) You will not message me back asking why or why not.
2) You are not an entitled prick who will give me abuse for being polite and letting you know you are not attractive to me in any form whatsoever.
3) You will not take my reply as some invitation to chat with you just because you are
3i) bored,
3ii) deperate,
3iii) oblivious to my reluctance to interact with you because i have manners.
Please do not reply to me, especially not with abuse.
Hope someone else wets your dick for you coz i couldn't give 2 shits.
Bye.
But you clearly state you don't meet single guys....so no need to reply lol."
blocked them so they can't even message. |
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I don't feel guilty for deleting messages where the persons made zero effort, why should I if they don't? If they've made an effort then I would reply even if a no. If they want to get into why or try to persuade me I just ignore any responses back as I've said no and it means no. |
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"
yes oh god yes the hardest thing about this internet fuckery is having to turn people down because anyone with half a brain cell knows it can cause others to question there self worth and cause a negative feeling where none is intended .
"
Tricky one, but you would hope that people using this site have twigged onto how it works.
If even the mildest form of rejection (being ignored), upsets someone or has them questioning their worth. They probably should not be hanging around here!
Personally as a bloke I get so few messages I do try to reply to all. But I have time on my hands, and only 1 or 2 (new people) messages a month! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"And anyone who writes (c&p's) me a story - instant block. I could pop down the library for a copy of Mills and Boon."
Ha I agree! Usually the story pretty soon gets round to the woman being on her knees sucking his cock. Ha. These guys do NOT get the 'What's In It For Me' rule!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sorry, i did not want to reply to your request for sex because my inbox has hundreds of similar requests.
But here i am, sending this message to you on the hope that;
1) You will not message me back a
sking why or why not.
2) You are not an entitled prick who will give me abuse for being polite and letting you know you are not attractive to me in any form whatsoever.
3) You will not take my reply as some invitation to chat with you just because you are
3i) bored,
3ii) deperate,
3iii) oblivious to my reluctance to interact with you because i have manners.
Please do not reply to me, especially not with abuse.
Hope someone else wets your dick for you coz i couldn't give 2 shits.
Bye.
But you clearly state you don't meet single guys....so no need to reply lol.
blocked them so they can't even message. "
Why respond if there's no interest...isn't that what this post is say or have I missed something? Blocking is partly to save time for both parties that are not interested who clearly state that in the profile or do not respond to a message. |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"Sorry, i did not want to reply to your request for sex because my inbox has hundreds of similar requests.
But here i am, sending this message to you on the hope that;
1) You will not message me back a
sking why or why not.
2) You are not an entitled prick who will give me abuse for being polite and letting you know you are not attractive to me in any form whatsoever.
3) You will not take my reply as some invitation to chat with you just because you are
3i) bored,
3ii) deperate,
3iii) oblivious to my reluctance to interact with you because i have manners.
Please do not reply to me, especially not with abuse.
Hope someone else wets your dick for you coz i couldn't give 2 shits.
Bye.
But you clearly state you don't meet single guys....so no need to reply lol.
blocked them so they can't even message.
Why respond if there's no interest...isn't that what this post is say or have I missed something? Blocking is partly to save time for both parties that are not interested who clearly state that in the profile or do not respond to a message."
i did want to meet single guys, so at one time i was rejecting them by not replying. now i cba, don't really find NSA sex anything of interest now. |
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"Sorry, i did not want to reply to your request for sex because my inbox has hundreds of similar requests.
But here i am, sending this message to you on the hope that;
1) You will not message me back asking why or why not.
2) You are not an entitled prick who will give me abuse for being polite and letting you know you are not attractive to me in any form whatsoever.
3) You will not take my reply as some invitation to chat with you just because you are
3i) bored,
3ii) deperate,
3iii) oblivious to my reluctance to interact with you because i have manners.
Please do not reply to me, especially not with abuse.
Hope someone else wets your dick for you coz i couldn't give 2 shits.
Bye."
Was that a "Thanks but no" then? |
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"And anyone who writes (c&p's) me a story - instant block. I could pop down the library for a copy of Mills and Boon.
Ha I agree! Usually the story pretty soon gets round to the woman being on her knees sucking his cock. Ha. These guys do NOT get the 'What's In It For Me' rule!! "
Oh boy! Let's not get started on the blowjob tip....... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sorry, i did not want to reply to your request for sex because my inbox has hundreds of similar requests.
But here i am, sending this message to you on the hope that;
1) You will not message me back a
sking why or why not.
2) You are not an entitled prick who will give me abuse for being polite and letting you know you are not attractive to me in any form whatsoever.
3) You will not take my reply as some invitation to chat with you just because you are
3i) bored,
3ii) deperate,
3iii) oblivious to my reluctance to interact with you because i have manners.
Please do not reply to me, especially not with abuse.
Hope someone else wets your dick for you coz i couldn't give 2 shits.
Bye.
But you clearly state you don't meet single guys....so no need to reply lol.
blocked them so they can't even message.
Why respond if there's no interest...isn't that what this post is say or have I missed something? Blocking is partly to save time for both parties that are not interested who clearly state that in the profile or do not respond to a message.
i did want to meet single guys, so at one time i was rejecting them by not replying. now i cba, don't really find NSA sex anything of interest now."
I've never found nsa of much interest....closest I'd come to it is if it's a fb....even then I like to chat about life and what's going on. All those I meet end up being friends and stay friends even when they move on from fab life. Polyamorous may describe it better what I'm about.... |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"i did want to meet single guys, so at one time i was rejecting them by not replying. now i cba, don't really find NSA sex anything of interest now.
I've never found nsa of much interest....closest I'd come to it is if it's a fb....even then I like to chat about life and what's going on. All those I meet end up being friends and stay friends even when they move on from fab life. Polyamorous may describe it better what I'm about...."
more guys need to be like that. |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"i did want to meet single guys, so at one time i was rejecting them by not replying. now i cba, don't really find NSA sex anything of interest now.
I've never found nsa of much interest....closest I'd come to it is if it's a fb....even then I like to chat about life and what's going on. All those I meet end up being friends and stay friends even when they move on from fab life. Polyamorous may describe it better what I'm about....
more guys need to be like that. "
and...taking a guess here but it makes logical sense...if more guys humanised women and themselves then maybe more of us would reply to messages because we would see people as people and not just another penis trying to enter our sexual space. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i did want to meet single guys, so at one time i was rejecting them by not replying. now i cba, don't really find NSA sex anything of interest now.
I've never found nsa of much interest....closest I'd come to it is if it's a fb....even then I like to chat about life and what's going on. All those I meet end up being friends and stay friends even when they move on from fab life. Polyamorous may describe it better what I'm about....
more guys need to be like that.
and...taking a guess here but it makes logical sense...if more guys humanised women and themselves then maybe more of us would reply to messages because we would see people as people and not just another penis trying to enter our sexual space."
I'd say your guess isn't far off the mark. In context is important as well....fab for many is a sex site, nsa, a quickie when im horny approach (just read a lot of womans stauses too) and not about getting to know the other for better sex. Think many accept...ok sex is better than no sex or infrequently very good sex. |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"i did want to meet single guys, so at one time i was rejecting them by not replying. now i cba, don't really find NSA sex anything of interest now.
I've never found nsa of much interest....closest I'd come to it is if it's a fb....even then I like to chat about life and what's going on. All those I meet end up being friends and stay friends even when they move on from fab life. Polyamorous may describe it better what I'm about....
more guys need to be like that.
and...taking a guess here but it makes logical sense...if more guys humanised women and themselves then maybe more of us would reply to messages because we would see people as people and not just another penis trying to enter our sexual space.
I'd say your guess isn't far off the mark. In context is important as well....fab for many is a sex site, nsa, a quickie when im horny approach (just read a lot of womans stauses too) and not about getting to know the other for better sex. Think many accept...ok sex is better than no sex or infrequently very good sex. "
it suited me at the time, the NSA and not much else, mentally i was getting what i wanted as i was processing a lot of stuff.
now this type of approach will damage me coz i have other things to work on that don't involve being NSA with people.
i'd rather have no sex now. well i want sex but not gonna go for meeting guys who will mess me up. |
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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago
Bristol |
"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here! "
Yes. I feel even worse if I have what I think is an innocuous forum related conversation and they just keep messaging. Over and over. Never asking me if I want to meet so there's never an opportunity to tell them I'm not interested. It doesn't happen often but jeez, it is painful! |
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Well...I try and reply to every message I get, apart from the ones where they can't spell, haven't read my profile or are monosyllabic.
I might be controversial but I have found that chatting with men even where I feel no initial attraction can be worthwhile, if they then go on to show personality...
Mind you it could also be that because the ones I am attracted to from their profile never message me or reply to my messages, if I didn't allow people to 'grow' on me, I'd get nowhere. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"...feel guilty deleting or not replying to messages where the person seems nice but you're just not attracted to them?
I always really feel like I want to reply, to be nice, as they have taken the time to send me a (usually personally written) message, but you know that a reply is that exciting to them they'll take it wrong and try and engage in conversation with you when it's a no-no from the start.
Any guys reading this whom I've deleted messages of, sorry it's not personal!!
Phew.
I get soooo many like that, and don't want to be horrible but it can't be helped on here!
Yes. I feel even worse if I have what I think is an innocuous forum related conversation and they just keep messaging. Over and over. Never asking me if I want to meet so there's never an opportunity to tell them I'm not interested. It doesn't happen often but jeez, it is painful!"
Oh that does my nut in! Feel that pain |
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