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about to blow this shit up
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advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now. |
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Walk away!! If you blab, you'll be vilified yourself as you continued to see his cheating arse.
I've been in your position before, it's why I now don't see cheaters. You're hurting, it'll hurt for a while but you'll eventually let go and find other cocks to play with  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Find a pal who has herpes and send her in then he will have to tell his wife
If the friend new then f#ck her if she didn't warn her
If not just walk away he will do the same thing
But face it you joined a swinging site with him wtf did you expect |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now."
Why do you feel it was acceptable for him to chest on his wife with you but unacceptable for him to "cheat" on you with another woman? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now.
Why do you feel it was acceptable for him to chest on his wife with you but unacceptable for him to "cheat" on you with another woman?"
Exactly what he said!!!
Sx |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
why tell the wife? you was happy enough to deceive her before this.
this is between you and him, and you're not even with him now. dunno if your friend promised to stay away as well but if she did then have it out with her too, otherwise leave her out of it. but let her know what he's like might be a good idea.
i'd have a go at him, let him know what you think of him and his lies and how he treated you. get it all out but vent your feelings at him, even if he doesn't care at least you get to say what you wanna say. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now.
Why do you feel it was acceptable for him to chest on his wife with you but unacceptable for him to "cheat" on you with another woman?
Exactly what he said!!!
Sx"
I'm afraid that I also agree with this.
Eve. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now."
Oh lord... why did I have to see this at 3:40am...
You sound like you are fuming and smoke is coming out...
Your thread title:
'About to blow this shit up'
We will never know the full story/dynamics, but you have explained your version.
OP I have a request...
Don't rush into any quick decision. Because there is no rush... right?
Get some sleep and then go through this thread later to see what opinions you get.
Please read this:
You knew he was married, but you was hooked. He got you into swinging and looking at your verifications you are having more fun then most on here...
You knew he was a player, swinger and cheater... and yet you 'asked him' not to do your best friend. You must realise there is a high chance he has done a lot more then you currently think. It is possible he is 'hooked' ...
You didn't walk away when you had the chance after 4 months into your relationship... so look what happend.
You now have a second chance to walk away... ask yourself do you want to be the person to have that pressure hanging over you knowing the wife will feel soo much worse then you are right now...
Your anger and hurt will bring much more pain and hurt to the wife.
All you have to do is walk away... less headache...
Less stress... less drama...
Focus your time to move on and start the next chapter. Prehaps continue as you are on here because you seem to be getting what you want. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Did you feel sorry for his wife when u was banging and swinging with him. No, so why break her heart just because yours is. Walk away. What happens on fab should stay on fab. We all know what everyone is on here for so deal with it and move on and find another swinging partner, and enjoy yourself  |
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By *ay19720Man
over a year ago
Ashford kent |
Its a hard situation when feelings start getting involved if u are the" other "...
U new what u were getting into..
And in honesty it sounds like yr more pissed off he banging ya."mate".
His wife may suspect he plays away but happy that.she aint got him over her..
He trying to get under yr skin buy doing ya mate....and has buy sound of it...
Just get yr own back and fuck his mate and fuck yr mates ex......hey simple.
But don't tell the wife to hurt him.........just hurt him..fuck his mates ..do his head in...let them tell him how u fucked them...lol
I once had a woman suck me off while her screaming ex was shouting down phone all angry...it was funny..  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
His wife has done nothing to you, so why destroy her life because you have found out his true colours? Your friend is a different matter. She has betrayed you (that's if she was a real friend) I'd leave karma to deal with that bitch. I've had someone like that in my life and doing nothing was the thing to do. The fella she professed was sooo in love with her has been banging half of the site behind her back and she's just seen as a total joke amongst people who were close friends. Karma - the bitch with high heels, red nails and a shit hot memory. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now.
Oh lord... why did I have to see this at 3:40am...
You sound like you are fuming and smoke is coming out...
Your thread title:
'About to blow this shit up'
We will never know the full story/dynamics, but you have explained your version.
OP I have a request...
Don't rush into any quick decision. Because there is no rush... right?
Get some sleep and then go through this thread later to see what opinions you get.
Please read this:
You knew he was married, but you was hooked. He got you into swinging and looking at your verifications you are having more fun then most on here...
You knew he was a player, swinger and cheater... and yet you 'asked him' not to do your best friend. You must realise there is a high chance he has done a lot more then you currently think. It is possible he is 'hooked' ...
You didn't walk away when you had the chance after 4 months into your relationship... so look what happend.
You now have a second chance to walk away... ask yourself do you want to be the person to have that pressure hanging over you knowing the wife will feel soo much worse then you are right now...
Your anger and hurt will bring much more pain and hurt to the wife.
All you have to do is walk away... less headache...
Less stress... less drama...
Focus your time to move on and start the next chapter. Prehaps continue as you are on here because you seem to be getting what you want."
Such good sensible advice. Sometimes you just have to pull your big girl pants up and walk away |
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So disappointed...
I thought this was the first site thread for bomb techs...
Not a single mention of how to dems an ied or ww2 bomb...
Oh well, while I'm here, I may as well comment...
Op, you have the chance to walk away with your head held high, don't fuck that up cos if you do tell the wife, it's likely to blow up in your face and cause you even more upset to you and drag you deep into a world of shit..
Let it go... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So to make you feel better you want to hurt someone else?
No. You had the chance to get out and you didn't. That is down to you. Asking a man who is cheating to not cheat on you? Well that's like telling the sun not to shine in a desert.
Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and get over him. Pronto. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It sounds to me the only reason you want to tell the wife is to try and stop him and your friend because your hurting , not due to any concern for her. Walk away |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You were quite happy to be "the other woman" and not give a fuck about his wife's feelings when he was shagging you behind her back. And then because he treated you in the same way you are suddenly the victim. Poor you.
And because you are hurting you want to hurt his wife even more."Hey you don't know me but I was your husband's bit on the side, do you know he's such a bastard he was sagging my mate behind both our backs". Maybe you can bond over your shared hurt...
Are you really that vile? Have some self respect and more importantly don't be the spiteful bitch that ruins someone else's life just because you feel hard done by. You are no way at all the innocent victim in this story |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Honesty?? No sure that's what you want but looks like your getting it.
You played with fire and you got burnt, simple. You only have yourself to blame, not his wife, not him or your friend!
What made you think that he wouldn't cheat on you? If he can't stay loyal to the woman he married, the one he goes home to after fucking you and probably makes love to. What makes you think your that special?
Take it from me, I'm a cheater and I know!!!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just walk away however I quite like the idea of ripping your so called friends head off!! But you don't want to deal with the mess that causes!  "
So presumably the wife of the guy shes been shsgging for 2 whole years should really rip the ops head off? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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From reading the opening post, it strikes me that there's a whole mess of wrongs here, and very little that's right.
Your hurt OP, and you want to lash out and share that hurt around. But that's just feeding all the wrongs in this situation, and ultimately it won't make you feel right again.
And if you 'blow this shit up, it won't heal you. More likely it will hurt you more. You need to heal yourself, and the best way to do that is to leave this toxic mess behind, not to feed it.
Walk away, because you're just as covered in the shit as everyone else. |
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He was cheating on the wife what made you think he was telling you the truth 
Your the one who won't come out of this well if you speak up it speaks of bitterness
He'll do the same to your friends live with that satisfaction
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By *aura66Woman
over a year ago
Belfast |
The only merit that I can see in the wife having knowledge of any of this , is that her health is being compromised because of her cheating hubbys multiple sexual partners with no ability to protect herself .
Although as you're coming at this from a position of vindictiveness & getting your own back. I don't think that you're the person to do it
Whats that old saying
If they cheat with you , they'll cheat on you . |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
i can get why you feel hurt though, as well as betrayed. it's sad your friend did that to you, never mind him.
only other advice i have for you is don't give your love or care to people who don't deserve that, and work on loving yourself for a while.
even though you did some 'wrong' things yourself, and everyone isn't impressed with that (i'm not either) i don't think we should have a go at you for having feelings and falling for a liar.
i hope you can see him for what he truly is coz it'll help you get over him more easily. |
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By *aminxMan
over a year ago
North Lakes |
"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now."
See if you can set it up for the wife to catch him cheating with out actually directly telling her!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i can get why you feel hurt though, as well as betrayed. it's sad your friend did that to you, never mind him.
only other advice i have for you is don't give your love or care to people who don't deserve that, and work on loving yourself for a while.
even though you did some 'wrong' things yourself, and everyone isn't impressed with that (i'm not either) i don't think we should have a go at you for having feelings and falling for a liar.
i hope you can see him for what he truly is coz it'll help you get over him more easily."
What did the friend fo wrong here though?
Rhe friend met a known swinger for a swinging meet both friend and the man are on fabs from the ops ranty profile heading.
|
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"i can get why you feel hurt though, as well as betrayed. it's sad your friend did that to you, never mind him.
only other advice i have for you is don't give your love or care to people who don't deserve that, and work on loving yourself for a while.
even though you did some 'wrong' things yourself, and everyone isn't impressed with that (i'm not either) i don't think we should have a go at you for having feelings and falling for a liar.
i hope you can see him for what he truly is coz it'll help you get over him more easily.
What did the friend fo wrong here though?
Rhe friend met a known swinger for a swinging meet both friend and the man are on fabs from the ops ranty profile heading.
"
she is hurting over this guy and her friend is fucking him.
there's other reasons i can think of but OP hasn't mentioned them so i won't say either. i don't think she has to justify anything either, although explaining might help people understand i doubt most people even want to understand. |
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By *ola.Woman
over a year ago
Just where I need to be. |
Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned.Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned.Seems this quote is quite apt. Don't do anything until you have calmed down. The most sensible answer is walk away. You had fun but now it's time to close that chapter in your life. |
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By *wo4FemCouple
over a year ago
Birmingham |
What a picture option A would be. Can you imagine it.
Excuse me your husband is cheating on you. We have been seeing each other for 2 years and now i'm pissed off because he is cheating on me with my friend. What do you think I should do about it?
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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id rag the head off ur so called mate ,and seek revenge on ur ex fella but wudnt tell the wife as she hasnt done anything to u  failing this just walk away
good luck x |
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"The only merit that I can see in the wife having knowledge of any of this , is that her health is being compromised because of her cheating hubbys multiple sexual partners with no ability to protect herself .
Although as you're coming at this from a position of vindictiveness & getting your own back. I don't think that you're the person to do it
Whats that old saying
If they cheat with you , they'll cheat on you . "
I like that saying |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
This is the downside of going with attached people and personally I hope you chalk it down to experience and walk away with your head held relatively high.
Strikes me that option a is your preferred course (or the one you've already taken) and you simply wanted validation.
Your 'friend' and your lover have both shown their true colours and will get what is coming to them. You don't need to be the one to serve it up.
I'm sure you'll receive some advice privately from people who have been in similar situations.
Do keep us updated |
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I like how the op is seeking the moral high ground on this
She willingly perpetuated a cheating relationship and was fine with that and seeking multiple partners in a swinging context.
Then she has the temerity to be surprised and upset that the man she was cheating with, cheated again.
What goes around ....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I like how the op is seeking the moral high ground on this
She willingly perpetuated a cheating relationship and was fine with that and seeking multiple partners in a swinging context.
Then she has the temerity to be surprised and upset that the man she was cheating with, cheated again.
What goes around .... "
Although she did say he wasn't honest at the outset. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"why tell the wife? you was happy enough to deceive her before this.
this is between you and him, and you're not even with him now. dunno if your friend promised to stay away as well but if she did then have it out with her too, otherwise leave her out of it. but let her know what he's like might be a good idea.
i'd have a go at him, let him know what you think of him and his lies and how he treated you. get it all out but vent your feelings at him, even if he doesn't care at least you get to say what you wanna say."
If you just want to vent this is the way to go
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Walk away, start looking forward, distance yourself from them all.
Living well and enjoying life is the best revenge,
laugh when it all falls apart for them but let it be by someone else's hand and you can smile from the side lines.
X |
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"'Close friend'?
Where's the girl code?
Horrid cow."
but it's ok to be a complete dickhead to the guys wife because she is a stranger to her.why not just treat people how you would like to be treated yourself and she wouldn't be in this situation . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I like how the op is seeking the moral high ground on this
She willingly perpetuated a cheating relationship and was fine with that and seeking multiple partners in a swinging context.
Then she has the temerity to be surprised and upset that the man she was cheating with, cheated again.
What goes around .... "
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned comes to mind..... |
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"I like how the op is seeking the moral high ground on this
She willingly perpetuated a cheating relationship and was fine with that and seeking multiple partners in a swinging context.
Then she has the temerity to be surprised and upset that the man she was cheating with, cheated again.
What goes around .... "
Ay,it's quite amusing isn't it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Be the better person in this situation and walk away from it
His wife is the innocent party in all this
I know your feeling hurt in all this which is natural
But is it fair to inflict you hurt, pain and misery on his wife
Has he got children? Just think of the damage you can cause if he has, just to make you feel better
You went into this with your eyes wide open
You knew he was already married
So in all fairness he was never really yours in the first place to take
Listen to the advice given
Walk away and let them get on with it
And as for your friend
Well she wasn't really a friend was she to do that to you if she knew how much you really liked him
Trust me he will do the same to her as what he has done to you
What's that saying a leopard never changes its spots
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now."
From my point of view, after reading the OP post, surely the initial mistake was carrying on with a relationship after you found out he was married.
I would have bolted at that point.
I know you say you were 'hooked' after 4 months when you found out, but surely that was your choice to carry on, knowing who he was.
It was your decision.
You could have chosen a different path so I'm sorry but to me, you are as much to blame.
Please move on. He has and there's nothing but pain, anger, resentment left. It's not worth wasting life on feeling that way. |
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By *ild-1Woman
over a year ago
york |
I might be wrong but think the op only found out he was married after they had been together a while. So she didn't intentionally set out to be with a married man.
I know how you feel as I am in your situation op and at one point I wanted to tell his wife but then I realised that not only would I look a twat but it's not her or the kids fault. When I had calmed down I realised I would have caused innocent people a lot of grief and not achieved anything!! |
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By *abe1200Couple
over a year ago
belfast |
What if the wife knew n they r in n open relationship or had some sort of agreement that he can do this n was just making out like he was cheating with you.I think two yrs is too long for not getting caught n still manage to go swinging.Whatever decision you take think hard before you act. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Should have walked when you found he lied about being single.
Telling his wife might not have the desired effect and is spiteful.
You could end up being cited in a divorce case. |
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"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now.
Oh lord... why did I have to see this at 3:40am...
You sound like you are fuming and smoke is coming out...
Your thread title:
'About to blow this shit up'
We will never know the full story/dynamics, but you have explained your version.
OP I have a request...
Don't rush into any quick decision. Because there is no rush... right?
Get some sleep and then go through this thread later to see what opinions you get.
Please read this:
You knew he was married, but you was hooked. He got you into swinging and looking at your verifications you are having more fun then most on here...
You knew he was a player, swinger and cheater... and yet you 'asked him' not to do your best friend. You must realise there is a high chance he has done a lot more then you currently think. It is possible he is 'hooked' ...
You didn't walk away when you had the chance after 4 months into your relationship... so look what happend.
You now have a second chance to walk away... ask yourself do you want to be the person to have that pressure hanging over you knowing the wife will feel soo much worse then you are right now...
Your anger and hurt will bring much more pain and hurt to the wife.
All you have to do is walk away... less headache...
Less stress... less drama...
Focus your time to move on and start the next chapter. Prehaps continue as you are on here because you seem to be getting what you want."
Just this....dust yourself down and move on.....plenty of men on here....fill your boots. |
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"From reading the opening post, it strikes me that there's a whole mess of wrongs here, and very little that's right.
Your hurt OP, and you want to lash out and share that hurt around. But that's just feeding all the wrongs in this situation, and ultimately it won't make you feel right again.
And if you 'blow this shit up, it won't heal you. More likely it will hurt you more. You need to heal yourself, and the best way to do that is to leave this toxic mess behind, not to feed it.
Walk away, because you're just as covered in the shit as everyone else. "
Pretty much this..
Creating a shit storm may seem a good idea when your angry and hurt but later on with the mess it will cause it will reflect badly upon mainly yourself..
Self respect is all. Walk away and be the bigger person..
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now."
I haven't read the thread so some of these may have been asked..
For over 2 years you saw him every day or every other day and was in constant contact? You spent time at his house and saw him every weekend? You went on holidays together and went out to restaurants and pubs? He introduced you to his friends and if he didn't you didn't think it odd?
Someone cheating for that amount of time is going to have to be pretty good to get away with not doing any of the above. Maybe own up to a lesson learned instead of trying to act like you never knew anything about a gf or wife in the first place? |
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"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now.
I haven't read the thread so some of these may have been asked..
For over 2 years you saw him every day or every other day and was in constant contact? You spent time at his house and saw him every weekend? You went on holidays together and went out to restaurants and pubs? He introduced you to his friends and if he didn't you didn't think it odd?
Someone cheating for that amount of time is going to have to be pretty good to get away with not doing any of the above. Maybe own up to a lesson learned instead of trying to act like you never knew anything about a gf or wife in the first place?"
I think she found out after 4 month's,I may be wrong though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now."
Why tell the wife?
You was fucking her husband for two years and that was fine? But now he's fucking somebody else you feel she needs to know  sounds very selfish to me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now.
Why do you feel it was acceptable for him to chest on his wife with you but unacceptable for him to "cheat" on you with another woman?"
Exactly this
He has made a commitment to his wife by marrying her you was just a fuck in the side, if he can't be true to his wife surely you didn't expect him to be true to you
And now you want to break his wife heart because things didn't go your way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now.
Why do you feel it was acceptable for him to chest on his wife with you but unacceptable for him to "cheat" on you with another woman?"
This guy...asking the real questions |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i can get why you feel hurt though, as well as betrayed. it's sad your friend did that to you, never mind him.
only other advice i have for you is don't give your love or care to people who don't deserve that, and work on loving yourself for a while.
even though you did some 'wrong' things yourself, and everyone isn't impressed with that (i'm not either) i don't think we should have a go at you for having feelings and falling for a liar.
i hope you can see him for what he truly is coz it'll help you get over him more easily.
What did the friend fo wrong here though?
Rhe friend met a known swinger for a swinging meet both friend and the man are on fabs from the ops ranty profile heading.
she is hurting over this guy and her friend is fucking him.
there's other reasons i can think of but OP hasn't mentioned them so i won't say either. i don't think she has to justify anything either, although explaining might help people understand i doubt most people even want to understand."
Friend was swinging with him before she was "hurting".
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"i can get why you feel hurt though, as well as betrayed. it's sad your friend did that to you, never mind him.
only other advice i have for you is don't give your love or care to people who don't deserve that, and work on loving yourself for a while.
even though you did some 'wrong' things yourself, and everyone isn't impressed with that (i'm not either) i don't think we should have a go at you for having feelings and falling for a liar.
i hope you can see him for what he truly is coz it'll help you get over him more easily.
What did the friend fo wrong here though?
Rhe friend met a known swinger for a swinging meet both friend and the man are on fabs from the ops ranty profile heading.
she is hurting over this guy and her friend is fucking him.
there's other reasons i can think of but OP hasn't mentioned them so i won't say either. i don't think she has to justify anything either, although explaining might help people understand i doubt most people even want to understand."
Understand what
That the OP thought she was something special and deserved different treatment and loyalty, but found out she’s not
So now wants to stir shit up.
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At the end of the day you can't change what has happened, so your anger will not be resolved. Yes, you may feel better at first because you've turned his world upside down (and his potentially innocent family's) however when all this kicks off... it is him with the shoulder to cry on. You may end up strengthening what you loathe so much. |
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Karma.... it's a bitch
He fucks you behind his wife's back and you're ok with it.
He fucks someone else behind his wife's back and your back and you want to tell her?!
News flash: All three of you doing the fucking are as bad as each other and Karma has come to visit.
The only innocent one in all this is the wife and you want to hurt her too?!
Take a long look in the mirror and have a word with yourself.
Oh and your 'friend' is no friend, he's a prick that doesn't deserve a faithful wife. I hope she's not. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What goes around comes around I guess. My sympathy lies with his wife. "
What goes around does come around. I was going to say this in my previous post.
The keyword is karma ...
However...
The way the OP was coming across I thought this may not have been appropriate to help in calming the situation:
'Blowing shit up'
Nobody else needs to get hurt. What is done is done.
Enough opinions in here now for OP to make a choice... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having said all of that...
It appears the OP has moved on and recovered in record time.
Her verifications are coming in thick and fast!
That is interesting |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Karma.... it's a bitch
He fucks you behind his wife's back and you're ok with it.
He fucks someone else behind his wife's back and your back and you want to tell her?!
News flash: All three of you doing the fucking are as bad as each other and Karma has come to visit.
The only innocent one in all this is the wife and you want to hurt her too?!
Take a long look in the mirror and have a word with yourself.
Oh and your 'friend' is no friend, he's a prick that doesn't deserve a faithful wife. I hope she's not."
Would like to borrow my tweezers? |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"i can get why you feel hurt though, as well as betrayed. it's sad your friend did that to you, never mind him.
only other advice i have for you is don't give your love or care to people who don't deserve that, and work on loving yourself for a while.
even though you did some 'wrong' things yourself, and everyone isn't impressed with that (i'm not either) i don't think we should have a go at you for having feelings and falling for a liar.
i hope you can see him for what he truly is coz it'll help you get over him more easily.
What did the friend fo wrong here though?
Rhe friend met a known swinger for a swinging meet both friend and the man are on fabs from the ops ranty profile heading.
she is hurting over this guy and her friend is fucking him.
there's other reasons i can think of but OP hasn't mentioned them so i won't say either. i don't think she has to justify anything either, although explaining might help people understand i doubt most people even want to understand.
Friend was swinging with him before she was "hurting".
"
but now she knows her friend is hurting, and if it was my friend i would be comforting them and not adding to that pain.
would you really participate in something that hurt your friend just for a fuck that you could get off someone else? |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
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"i can get why you feel hurt though, as well as betrayed. it's sad your friend did that to you, never mind him.
only other advice i have for you is don't give your love or care to people who don't deserve that, and work on loving yourself for a while.
even though you did some 'wrong' things yourself, and everyone isn't impressed with that (i'm not either) i don't think we should have a go at you for having feelings and falling for a liar.
i hope you can see him for what he truly is coz it'll help you get over him more easily.
What did the friend fo wrong here though?
Rhe friend met a known swinger for a swinging meet both friend and the man are on fabs from the ops ranty profile heading.
she is hurting over this guy and her friend is fucking him.
there's other reasons i can think of but OP hasn't mentioned them so i won't say either. i don't think she has to justify anything either, although explaining might help people understand i doubt most people even want to understand.
Understand what
That the OP thought she was something special and deserved different treatment and loyalty, but found out she’s not
So now wants to stir shit up.
"
that doesn't matter, if those are her feelings who are we to invalidate them? i don't agree with the revenge bit, i think it'll just cause more problems, all the rest you cannot invalidate coz you're feelings are you and what make you, you.
my point is her friend is adding to her pain and doesn't seem to care. that's sad.
if you're a friend you should support them and not add to her pain.
bet it was great finding out you mean nothing to a guy (who lied to you so is probably manipulative to get what he wants) and then you find out your friend doesn't give a shit about you either. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i can get why you feel hurt though, as well as betrayed. it's sad your friend did that to you, never mind him.
only other advice i have for you is don't give your love or care to people who don't deserve that, and work on loving yourself for a while.
even though you did some 'wrong' things yourself, and everyone isn't impressed with that (i'm not either) i don't think we should have a go at you for having feelings and falling for a liar.
i hope you can see him for what he truly is coz it'll help you get over him more easily.
What did the friend fo wrong here though?
Rhe friend met a known swinger for a swinging meet both friend and the man are on fabs from the ops ranty profile heading.
she is hurting over this guy and her friend is fucking him.
there's other reasons i can think of but OP hasn't mentioned them so i won't say either. i don't think she has to justify anything either, although explaining might help people understand i doubt most people even want to understand.
Friend was swinging with him before she was "hurting".
but now she knows her friend is hurting, and if it was my friend i would be comforting them and not adding to that pain.
would you really participate in something that hurt your friend just for a fuck that you could get off someone else?"
Given that he was married, having an affair and actively swinging, maybe the friend didn't realise that he was off limit? She only said she told him to keep away from the friend |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
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"i can get why you feel hurt though, as well as betrayed. it's sad your friend did that to you, never mind him.
only other advice i have for you is don't give your love or care to people who don't deserve that, and work on loving yourself for a while.
even though you did some 'wrong' things yourself, and everyone isn't impressed with that (i'm not either) i don't think we should have a go at you for having feelings and falling for a liar.
i hope you can see him for what he truly is coz it'll help you get over him more easily.
What did the friend fo wrong here though?
Rhe friend met a known swinger for a swinging meet both friend and the man are on fabs from the ops ranty profile heading.
she is hurting over this guy and her friend is fucking him.
there's other reasons i can think of but OP hasn't mentioned them so i won't say either. i don't think she has to justify anything either, although explaining might help people understand i doubt most people even want to understand.
Friend was swinging with him before she was "hurting".
but now she knows her friend is hurting, and if it was my friend i would be comforting them and not adding to that pain.
would you really participate in something that hurt your friend just for a fuck that you could get off someone else?
Given that he was married, having an affair and actively swinging, maybe the friend didn't realise that he was off limit? She only said she told him to keep away from the friend "
if the friend knows she's hurting right now then she should class him as off limits for now.
it's all a fucked up situation, and i can see why people stay away from married men just down to this mess alone but, still just coz the OP did something bad doesn't mean she deserves to be put through more shit.
men you're fucking should never be a priority over someone you genuinely care for, is my point. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm just scoffing chinese and a piece of meat went down the wrong hole, nearly suffocated myself, in fact to make matters worse my right chopstick is now wedged up my nose.
The reason I nearly suffocated was,I can't actually believe the OP has been cheating with a married man for 2 years and she's feeling all betrayed?... 
Swap the OP for a man and if a man had posted this threa, it would be lit up like Moses and the burning bush. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm just scoffing chinese and a piece of meat went down the wrong hole, nearly suffocated myself, in fact to make matters worse my right chopstick is now wedged up my nose.
The reason I nearly suffocated was,I can't actually believe the OP has been cheating with a married man for 2 years and she's feeling all betrayed?...
Swap the OP for a man and if a man had posted this threa, it would be lit up like Moses and the burning bush. "
Thank fuck someone else sees the difference in reactions between men & women posting |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"I'm just scoffing chinese and a piece of meat went down the wrong hole, nearly suffocated myself, in fact to make matters worse my right chopstick is now wedged up my nose.
The reason I nearly suffocated was,I can't actually believe the OP has been cheating with a married man for 2 years and she's feeling all betrayed?...
Swap the OP for a man and if a man had posted this threa, it would be lit up like Moses and the burning bush. "
With any luck it was late night stupidity and she rethought in the morning.
However I agree - this is one of those times where she really should have had the same responses as a man posting the same. I've never heard of anything so selfish in all my life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"advice please from a swingers point of view.
had a relationship for 2yrs after 4 mths found out he was married. it was to late I was already hooked. about 9 mths in he introduced me to swinging. I loved it still do. we finished 3mths ago got to difficult yada yada. find out today a very good friend is banging him and was before it finished. the only thing j ever really asked was that he didn't do her. so now I feel betrayed and hurt so do I a) tell the wife who has no idea and tear the so called friend a new one. or do I b) just walk away. I'll be honest option a is sounding really good right now."
Dnt do it. She's done nothing. What will you gain from it. I've been hurt but rise above that kind of shit. Also if you send photos uou can be prosecuted. Think yourself lucky to be rid of him |
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"i can get why you feel hurt though, as well as betrayed. it's sad your friend did that to you, never mind him.
only other advice i have for you is don't give your love or care to people who don't deserve that, and work on loving yourself for a while.
even though you did some 'wrong' things yourself, and everyone isn't impressed with that (i'm not either) i don't think we should have a go at you for having feelings and falling for a liar.
i hope you can see him for what he truly is coz it'll help you get over him more easily.
What did the friend fo wrong here though?
Rhe friend met a known swinger for a swinging meet both friend and the man are on fabs from the ops ranty profile heading.
she is hurting over this guy and her friend is fucking him.
there's other reasons i can think of but OP hasn't mentioned them so i won't say either. i don't think she has to justify anything either, although explaining might help people understand i doubt most people even want to understand.
Friend was swinging with him before she was "hurting".
but now she knows her friend is hurting, and if it was my friend i would be comforting them and not adding to that pain.
would you really participate in something that hurt your friend just for a fuck that you could get off someone else?
Given that he was married, having an affair and actively swinging, maybe the friend didn't realise that he was off limit? She only said she told him to keep away from the friend
if the friend knows she's hurting right now then she should class him as off limits for now.
it's all a fucked up situation, and i can see why people stay away from married men just down to this mess alone but, still just coz the OP did something bad doesn't mean she deserves to be put through more shit.
men you're fucking should never be a priority over someone you genuinely care for, is my point."
That's it though there is only one side of the story so assumptions are being made.
It's obviously a double whammy it's sad that she's feeling hurt and found out it's not fun when someone out for sex lies to the people they are with. Oh but now its happened to her it's okay to want have a go at people.
To me that smacks of someone believing they are so special the person wouldn't do it to them.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm just scoffing chinese and a piece of meat went down the wrong hole, nearly suffocated myself, in fact to make matters worse my right chopstick is now wedged up my nose.
The reason I nearly suffocated was,I can't actually believe the OP has been cheating with a married man for 2 years and she's feeling all betrayed?...
Swap the OP for a man and if a man had posted this threa, it would be lit up like Moses and the burning bush. "
This would make it a killer thread
Makes a change from thread killer  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm just scoffing chinese and a piece of meat went down the wrong hole, nearly suffocated myself, in fact to make matters worse my right chopstick is now wedged up my nose.
The reason I nearly suffocated was,I can't actually believe the OP has been cheating with a married man for 2 years and she's feeling all betrayed?...
Swap the OP for a man and if a man had posted this threa, it would be lit up like Moses and the burning bush. "
For sure |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm just scoffing chinese and a piece of meat went down the wrong hole, nearly suffocated myself, in fact to make matters worse my right chopstick is now wedged up my nose.
The reason I nearly suffocated was,I can't actually believe the OP has been cheating with a married man for 2 years and she's feeling all betrayed?...
Swap the OP for a man and if a man had posted this threa, it would be lit up like Moses and the burning bush.
Thank fuck someone else sees the difference in reactions between men & women posting "
We all see the difference we just can't be arsed to comment. It's clearly bollocks. If the op was remotely interested she'd be back to check responses. |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
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"i can get why you feel hurt though, as well as betrayed. it's sad your friend did that to you, never mind him.
only other advice i have for you is don't give your love or care to people who don't deserve that, and work on loving yourself for a while.
even though you did some 'wrong' things yourself, and everyone isn't impressed with that (i'm not either) i don't think we should have a go at you for having feelings and falling for a liar.
i hope you can see him for what he truly is coz it'll help you get over him more easily.
What did the friend fo wrong here though?
Rhe friend met a known swinger for a swinging meet both friend and the man are on fabs from the ops ranty profile heading.
she is hurting over this guy and her friend is fucking him.
there's other reasons i can think of but OP hasn't mentioned them so i won't say either. i don't think she has to justify anything either, although explaining might help people understand i doubt most people even want to understand.
Friend was swinging with him before she was "hurting".
but now she knows her friend is hurting, and if it was my friend i would be comforting them and not adding to that pain.
would you really participate in something that hurt your friend just for a fuck that you could get off someone else?
Given that he was married, having an affair and actively swinging, maybe the friend didn't realise that he was off limit? She only said she told him to keep away from the friend
if the friend knows she's hurting right now then she should class him as off limits for now.
it's all a fucked up situation, and i can see why people stay away from married men just down to this mess alone but, still just coz the OP did something bad doesn't mean she deserves to be put through more shit.
men you're fucking should never be a priority over someone you genuinely care for, is my point.
That's it though there is only one side of the story so assumptions are being made.
It's obviously a double whammy it's sad that she's feeling hurt and found out it's not fun when someone out for sex lies to the people they are with. Oh but now its happened to her it's okay to want have a go at people.
To me that smacks of someone believing they are so special the person wouldn't do it to them.
"
he probably made her feel like she was special tbh. but like you say, assumptions.
i don't condone the cheating. i just feel a bit bad just because she has done something wrong now people are trying to invalidate how she feels.
if she has empathy for others then i'm sure once her feelings aren't as strong she will realise how the wife feels. or (more likely) she probably knows already and just wants him to feel the pain she is feeling.
i just felt like she was being demonised for doing something wrong, which i also don't condone, and we sort of forgot she is a person too.
and i'd treat a guy the same way also, seeing as i notice the comments about that (and you didn't say them) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't understand why everyone keeps posting the OP asked a question and hasn't even been on to reply . I bet she will tell the wife regardless of help from this thread, as what's already been said she was ok to fuck him behind his wife's back but now she's got the hump |
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