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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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is it just me or are things getting a bit too agressive and defensive and people becoming very fussy , guys getting annoyed about not getting meets , women about their mail , couples about not finding the right people for them , i thoought this was all meant to be fun ???? seen so many profiles recently with things on them , if you cant do this or wont do that , if you dont have this job or you dont have this on your profile, if you cant accomm , if you are this if you are that , if your into this if your into that , if you type like this , if you shout if you are single list goes on and on and on and on , seems everything has got so negative recently and iv noticed a few people leaving for various reasons , what happened to the friendly place this was before ??? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You think that's all new then?
It's part and parcel of swinging. When people are looking to do the most intimate thing human beings can do they have a right to be choosy over who they do it with. Some people won't take no for an answer though and that's when tempers get freyed. You learn to ignore all that over time and focus on those you feel a connection with. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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it seems to me that most of these problems are caused by ppl on here not actually being honest........ i think if profiles were written with more openly and honestly most of these probelms would be resolved. we are such a cpl who have had to add more and more info on our profile in order to attract the right ppl, and not those who endeavour to try and change our boundaries......... more fun and less selflessness is required by quite a number from what i can see...... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ahhh, so theres been a bit of this and that in the forums. The rest of it is just how it is....
Personally I'm finding I'm in quite a nice place here at the moment, you get out what you put in... (and no I don't mean put in 100 messages, get 100 back, lol). |
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ive known it much worse on here, thought things were quite calm on here recently, i hate aggressive profiles tho and that stupid anty institutions warning, (actually we do have an any institution warning on our profile which is far more usefull, have a look) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"it seems to me that most of these problems are caused by ppl on here not actually being honest........ i think if profiles were written with more openly and honestly most of these probelms would be resolved. we are such a cpl who have had to add more and more info on our profile in order to attract the right ppl, and not those who endeavour to try and change our boundaries......... more fun and less selflessness is required by quite a number from what i can see......"
Did you update your profile out of sequence?
John can meet on his own....
We only play as a couple... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To the OP ..
There's nothing new about the scanrio mentioned in your post, but we agree and have said this before -.....
Too many people take swinging far to seriously.
For heavens sake it's supposed to be a bit of fun not a matter of life or death, although some people seem to think it is.
So what if you don't get a reply, so what if you don't get a meet - the world won't come to an end, there is always another day.
If we have 2 meets a year we consider that we've done well out of it. if we have no meets then so be it ..
I think folks need to take a step back, gather up their thoughts, climb out of the bogged down rut into which they have fallen and take a fresh new look at swinging and live for the moment - take it as it comes  |
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Well im fussy and im going to stay that way, because by being fussy it means i get fabulous meets. Quantity over quality for me every time. Id be more bothered by the people that would just settle for anything to get a shag |
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By *edhot4blkCouple
over a year ago
York/London/Crantock |
we started off in this scene to have fun and fun only, weve made it clear as to what we are looking for and what we arent looking for..and if guys keep to that then its fun fun fun all the way and we all have a gr8 time..its when peeps mail us wanting to play who have read our profile and can see they arent what we are wanting but still try anyway..alot of the guys say "" ok thank u for replying "" then move onto the next fem/cpl and chance their luck and good luck to them, but there is a small amount of fools that know they are not what we are looking for and we tell them so and all we recieve is abuse such as "" im a fat bitch, they hope i catch aids, im ugly, and so on and so forth...i think the main reason some guys are like this is because they see a femal on a swing site and think that fem will go with anything, well this fem wont..lol..xxx stella |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well im fussy and im going to stay that way, because by being fussy it means i get fabulous meets. Quantity over quality for me every time. Id be more bothered by the people that would just settle for anything to get a shag"
I'm with you on this one! Think if you get your profile right hopefully it will put off the people that you don't particularly want to meet! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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problem is lots either dont read profiles or think they are somehow.... entitled to ignore the bits that dont fit them....... we have met some nice ppl, but some strange ones as well, even a guy who beat his wife up in our bathroom..... and yes before you say it we did meet before hand in a pub lol..... so very weary now as to what ppl actually say and mean. john would meet alone as i have met alone myself but only after john has met the guy with me |
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By *edhot4blkCouple
over a year ago
York/London/Crantock |
GreyEyes...
how i wish u were right...weve been on the site for well over a yr now and have re-typed our profile more times than i can remember, i think the problem is alot of guys just go thru the profiles till they see female/cpl and try their luck..we recieve on average 50 mails a day and if im lucky 2 of the e-mails might be from guys we are looking for, the rest seem to be to old/young, bi or married |
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By *edhot4blkCouple
over a year ago
York/London/Crantock |
we met a cpl from this site and yes we had been for a drink with them a few times and up to that point they were gr8 and we all got on really well, anyway a long story cut short we were at it on our bed and her hubby couldnt get it hard so tony and i and his wife were playing and having a gr8 time till her hubby got pissed off and started getting nasty...tony threw them both out and their clothes as well..lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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lol....excellent thats the way........ we met one cpl who wanted same room but when we started having fun , they said they had to be touching all the time. each other i mean. not sure thats actually possible lol........... so i stopped play........ |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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hmm ok my geberal feeling is that if this was a bar or a club wouldnt be like this , seems because people are not face to face there is a lot more abuse or agression going around , if it was a club seems to me would be constant bikering and an atmosphere you could cut with a knife . I know i not been around long on this site and people say its been worse , maybe its just me and the way i see things , yes sometimes certain people spoil the fun for the genuine people and i am by no means having a go at anyone , just seems a really odd way for things to be in a place where everyone is pretty open about what they here for and what they are after . |
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By *edhot4blkCouple
over a year ago
York/London/Crantock |
we find cpls are very complicated at the best of times, if u cant cam, or both phone straight away alot of cpls seem to call u a timewaster even though i have to add we dont cam and wont phone till weve chatted mail/room first for a while...theres nothing like meeting a cpl of single straight vvvwe guys to join the hubby and myself for a good old fashioned shag...cant beat it...xxxx |
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By *edhot4blkCouple
over a year ago
York/London/Crantock |
brokensailor...
i'll tell u what to do...make a female profile for a while and see how many freaks etc mail u, alot of guys cant seem to work out why us fems complain so manytimes but u were a fem u would soon see, the bad thing is u make it as plain as poss in ur profile what u are not wanting and the freaks still mail u anyway..lol |
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"is it just me or are things getting a bit too agressive and defensive and people becoming very fussy , guys getting annoyed about not getting meets , women about their mail , couples about not finding the right people for them , i thoought this was all meant to be fun ???? seen so many profiles recently with things on them , if you cant do this or wont do that , if you dont have this job or you dont have this on your profile, if you cant accomm , if you are this if you are that , if your into this if your into that , if you type like this , if you shout if you are single list goes on and on and on and on , seems everything has got so negative recently and iv noticed a few people leaving for various reasons , what happened to the friendly place this was before ???"
There's more members and therefore more competition. Some folks just can't handle rejection in any aspect of their life and especially in such an intimate area as sex. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"problem is lots either dont read profiles or think they are somehow.... entitled to ignore the bits that dont fit them....... we have met some nice ppl, but some strange ones as well, even a guy who beat his wife up in our bathroom..... and yes before you say it we did meet before hand in a pub lol..... so very weary now as to what ppl actually say and mean. john would meet alone as i have met alone myself but only after john has met the guy with me "
Bloody hell, guess it's all down to jealousy. He though she was having a better time than him, or enjoying it too much...Clearly swapping is not for them. |
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By *edhot4blkCouple
over a year ago
York/London/Crantock |
When we first started swinging we did so with cpls and cpls only and on the whole alot of the meets were fine and we are still good friends with those cpls even though a gr8 amount of yrs have passed..but a few of the meets with cpls havent been gr8 and i have to add most of the time when the trouble started on the few occasions it did it was always the male of the cpl..if the wife was doing something she wouldnt do with her hubby, or enjoying herself far to much etc the male of the cpl seemed not to be a happy bunny...
Alot of the cpls we have met over the yrs have all said the same thing, they all think its the male of the cpl who always wants to start swinging and talks his wife/partner into it and when his wife/partner seems to like it to much the hubby isnt happy...so yes i think "" Jealousy "" has alot to do with it..
We on the other hand decided many yrs ago to start swinging but only when the kids had grown up and fled the nest so to speak...so we are fairly lucky as in being married for over 30yrs we dont need it to spice our marriage up as a lot do, some peeps when their marriage is failing they seem to think "" i know we'll start swinging to make it strong again "", thats a big mistake and will not work..i think with us being lovers, and best mates first and swingers second there isnt a problem..xxxx stella.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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brokensailor...
thats the problem, even though some appear to be open, in fact they are far from it, and im not saying all are thats for sure. lots of genuine, nice ppl on here, but as always the few sad ones who intend on getting what they want without a seond thought about others always put a dampner on things..... but as long as you know your nice dont go worrying about it, i certainly dont any more, and would never lower our standards just to get another notch on the bedpost..... have fun and stay safe thats the most imptortant thing to remember.... |
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