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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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so other than gettin the old school pics out, what would be the 'embarrasing' story from your youth that your mum would tell me ?
mine would be when i was a toddler dropping some of grandma's stew on my nudger
1 of their dogs spotted it, went under the table and started to lick it off
to which i apparently threw my arms back and declared 'i like it mum, i like it !'  |
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My dad told me of a stunt he played as a youngster, which I decided to do on a guy who lived down the street.
I knew he went out of an evening and came home when it was dark.
I snook out of the house, with a lolly stick and a drawing pin, found some doggy doo, put the drawing pin on the latch of the back gate, then covered it in doggy doo.
guy came home, put his finger on the latch, it drew blood, he instintively put the finger in his mouth covered in SH1T.
He related this story to my Dad, trust me everyone thought I was angelic.
My Dad grabbed me and gave me a damn good hiding.
I told him that I was only doing what he had done.
He said, 'well I got a good hiding too'
I pointed out he never told me that bit  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My mum would tell you that I could be a little shit all day long and then 5 minutes before dad was due home I'd go up to her, tug her apron, look up and say 'I wuff you mummy."
Her heart used to melt and dad wouldn't hear about my antics. Well he would, but not with the venom mum had planned cos I'd driven her mad all day. Job done. Sorted. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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oh and there is 1 that she never lets me forget - she doesn't need an audience for this 1 lol
i think it's done out of duty to mortify me in the same way it mortified her at the time
i was about 6 at the time
mum had a friend who we used to go and visit. the lady had very bad skin and was apparantly extremely self concious about it
as an adult, you pass skin conditions etc off as a normal part of life, but as a kid you notice these things !
so u can imagine mums reaction when in the midst of their tea & biscuits chat session, i piped up 'Angela ? Have you always been spotty ?'  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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She would say that when I was little I saw her taking a tampon out of the bathroom cabinet. I thought it was a chewing gum and asked her if I could have one. She said no, and ushered me out of the bathroom.
I screamed, like the little diva I was, to my dad and said that Mummy wont give me a chewing gum and shes locked in the bathroom eating it herself |
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"She would say that when I was little I saw her taking a tampon out of the bathroom cabinet. I thought it was a chewing gum and asked her if I could have one. She said no, and ushered me out of the bathroom.
I screamed, like the little diva I was, to my dad and said that Mummy wont give me a chewing gum and shes locked in the bathroom eating it herself "
In the good old days of Doctor Whites (ask your mum youngsters). I used to run round the street with one over my mouth pretending I was a nurse. PLease ask mums to explain |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My mum would tell many stories about me
1) when dad painted the bannister rail and i waltzed down it with my black fur jacket on
2) when my dad had put his false teeth to soak in a mug and i put the mug in the freezer
3) hiding my friend in the garden shed when she left home, police called and I denied i had seen her. all was well until dad went into the shed to see her sitting there eating mums apple pie
many many other stories |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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me and my brother found a pack of moms sanitary towels and we thought they were pretend Santa beards 
She nearly choked on her tea when me and my brother walked into the kitchen with them hanging off our ears |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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well as a mum I can tell a story about my daughter then
as a family we had gone for a posh restaurant meal. all members there, both sets of grandparents, bearing in mind one grandfather a minster and that side very religious and anal.
daughter goes off to the toilets, only young at the time. comes back with the sanitary towel paper bags and gives everyone a bag, and insisted they all put their after eight mints in to take home |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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mymum tells everyone, i used to ride up and down the road naked on my bike and that i had a penchamnt for frilly knickers .....we always revert to type dont we ???? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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the time in church when i said very loudly during a prayer "mummy why is jesus wearing a nappy"
the time on a bus that the guy behind us farted and i insisted he said "pardon me" the poor guy went bright red and mumbled it which wasn't good enough for me and i said "i can't hear you" till he said it loudly |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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one of my gay mates says his mum used to let him stand on the kitchen table in her nightie and sing dusty springfield songs
i swear some women want a gay son ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"one of my gay mates says his mum used to let him stand on the kitchen table in her nightie and sing dusty springfield songs
i swear some women want a gay son !"
we all want a gay best friend ..... |
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"me and my brother found a pack of moms sanitary towels and we thought they were pretend Santa beards
She nearly choked on her tea when me and my brother walked into the kitchen with them hanging off our ears "
lmfao ...@ above
i remember when i was about 7 deciding it was time to learn to drive so i sat in dads seat and pulled the hand brake up and off like he does and the car rolled down the slope and through the back wall of the garage ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"one of my gay mates says his mum used to let him stand on the kitchen table in her nightie and sing dusty springfield songs
i swear some women want a gay son !
we all want a gay best friend ..... "
Not if he's Mike Tyson though. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"one of my gay mates says his mum used to let him stand on the kitchen table in her nightie and sing dusty springfield songs
i swear some women want a gay son !
we all want a gay best friend .....
Not if he's Mike Tyson though. "
Mike Tyson is gay ?
Urban Myth ?
I bagsy not asking him to confirm or deny ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"one of my gay mates says his mum used to let him stand on the kitchen table in her nightie and sing dusty springfield songs
i swear some women want a gay son !
we all want a gay best friend .....
Not if he's Mike Tyson though.
Mike Tyson is gay ?
Urban Myth ?
I bagsy not asking him to confirm or deny ! "
Well he don't like women very much does he. He beat the crap out the last one. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mike Tyson beats the crap out of EVERYONE not just women....He is a BAD man.....
I disowned my mum so she has a lot of "nice" things to say about me..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Whilst having a 'who can skid on their knees the furthest' competition at a wedding, I took out the brides grandma like a bowling pin and broke her arm. We were asked to leave.
My children were so embarrassed .... |
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