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Dukes sex party sabotaged by a feminist
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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The Duke would like it known he values and enjoys all pussy. However, he will not tolerate certain individuals who disrupt his lifestyle and put a downer on his vaginal banquets.
Here at Duke Towers a February sware took place. A number of first timers were on the list. Upon arrival, one supposed swinger was singled out as a potential trouble maker by my assistant. She wore sensible shoes and carried a hand bag. Female guests always arrive barefoot at the request of Duke.
During his pre hairy axe wound massacre speech, this individual huffed and puffed whilst hoping from one swollen foot to the other. The warning signs were there.
Now The Duke understands his tastes are not to everybody's liking, this is why the Duke Towers guest list is so exclusive and shrouded in secrecy. However, on occasion when the assistant is having her time of the month or something, the odd wet drip can slip through the net and penetrate the inner circle. Nothing sets the Dukes mighty serpent into slumber quicker than a shrill menopausal voice complaining as he pounds the cock cave of a willing fertile hotty. It is unforgivable to ask a guest if they are comfortable as Dule drills her a new sin slit. How is one supposed to feast on the bearded clam when a lose cannon is waddling around babbling about gender equality?
The final insult came when said offender was told to serve Duke a ginger ale then present herself on all fours. This simple command was met with a flurry of incoherent objections and historical references that upset my willing hotties.
Thankfully my security team removed the pretend swinger and she was last seen being collected by her middle aged depressed husband no doubt on route to browse the local garden center.
Let this be a lesson to my fellow party hosts, double check your guest lists for the sulky resentful Debbie downers whom hinder our lifestyle and haunt these forums.
Duke has spoken
#Duke |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm beginning to wonder how heavily medicated 'The Duke' is or if he should be on a higher dose.
 "
As a nurse if he was in my unit he would most definitely be given a higher dose  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wish I had remembered you at the end of last year. You're a definite contender for funniest forumite."
 is it wrong that I giggle whilst reading his posts? 
Jane x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i got a pm off the op about this thread, a very odd fellow indeed
Us also haha x"
trying to drum up folk for his thread maybe? popularity bid perhaps?
it worked |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i got a pm off the op about this thread, a very odd fellow indeed
Us also haha x
trying to drum up folk for his thread maybe? popularity bid perhaps?
it worked "
Or it could be his way of inviting us to his party    haha
Bet he used copy and paste too, how rude haha x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i got a pm off the op about this thread, a very odd fellow indeed
Us also haha x
trying to drum up folk for his thread maybe? popularity bid perhaps?
it worked
Or it could be his way of inviting us to his party haha
Bet he used copy and paste too, how rude haha x"
i forget the precise wording, i just looked at it, was confused as i didn't recognise the sender or have a clue what he was talking about and deleted it, then i saw this thread and the penny dropped!
very odd behaviour |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i got a pm off the op about this thread, a very odd fellow indeed
Us also haha x
trying to drum up folk for his thread maybe? popularity bid perhaps?
it worked
Or it could be his way of inviting us to his party haha
Bet he used copy and paste too, how rude haha x
i forget the precise wording, i just looked at it, was confused as i didn't recognise the sender or have a clue what he was talking about and deleted it, then i saw this thread and the penny dropped!
very odd behaviour "
Either very odd or very clever  x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i got a pm off the op about this thread, a very odd fellow indeed
Us also haha x
trying to drum up folk for his thread maybe? popularity bid perhaps?
it worked
Or it could be his way of inviting us to his party haha
Bet he used copy and paste too, how rude haha x
i forget the precise wording, i just looked at it, was confused as i didn't recognise the sender or have a clue what he was talking about and deleted it, then i saw this thread and the penny dropped!
very odd behaviour
Either very odd or very clever x"
i think it's a drive to get folk onto the thread, that with the odd thread style makes me think it's a bid to become known or memorable, a bit of a popularity drive.
it's an angle i suppose 
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i got a pm off the op about this thread, a very odd fellow indeed
Us also haha x
trying to drum up folk for his thread maybe? popularity bid perhaps?
it worked
Or it could be his way of inviting us to his party haha
Bet he used copy and paste too, how rude haha x
i forget the precise wording, i just looked at it, was confused as i didn't recognise the sender or have a clue what he was talking about and deleted it, then i saw this thread and the penny dropped!
very odd behaviour
Either very odd or very clever x
i think it's a drive to get folk onto the thread, that with the odd thread style makes me think it's a bid to become known or memorable, a bit of a popularity drive.
it's an angle i suppose
"
Well love him or hate him he's definitely achieved (as far as I can tell) his subjective if that's the case
I'd not heard nor noticed him before these strange but *imo* funny threads he keeps posting, and I'm just a forum passer by
Jane x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i got a pm off the op about this thread, a very odd fellow indeed
Us also haha x
trying to drum up folk for his thread maybe? popularity bid perhaps?
it worked
Or it could be his way of inviting us to his party haha
Bet he used copy and paste too, how rude haha x
i forget the precise wording, i just looked at it, was confused as i didn't recognise the sender or have a clue what he was talking about and deleted it, then i saw this thread and the penny dropped!
very odd behaviour
Either very odd or very clever x
i think it's a drive to get folk onto the thread, that with the odd thread style makes me think it's a bid to become known or memorable, a bit of a popularity drive.
it's an angle i suppose
Well love him or hate him he's definitely achieved (as far as I can tell) his subjective if that's the case
I'd not heard nor noticed him before these strange but *imo* funny threads he keeps posting, and I'm just a forum passer by
Jane x"
neither love nor hate, they're both way to strong feelings to apply to someone off the back of a forum thread
i'd agree that it seems to have worked though, the chap's found and angle and is going with it, fair play |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Very odd spelling for a 'toff'
I can only guess that a sware is a soiree.
Unforgivable "
I thought that too, and gave up reading the OP after that little faux pas
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By *im_66Woman
over a year ago
Bradford |
"I'm beginning to wonder how heavily medicated 'The Duke' is or if he should be on a higher dose.
As a nurse if he was in my unit he would most definitely be given a higher dose "
Btw - *soiree* |
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"I wish I had remembered you at the end of last year. You're a definite contender for funniest forumite.
"
I don't find the threads funny. I read them. I want to. They are different to the inherent drivel that appears most of the time.
A little cheeky, like a naughty boy but not highly intellectual nor side splitting.
I'd like more though.
Time will tell. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"The Duke actually sent me a message... I don't know if I should be flattered or terrified. I didn't reply"
Terrified, definitely.
Are his messages like his forum posts? Did he ask to inspect your axe wound? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wish I had remembered you at the end of last year. You're a definite contender for funniest forumite.
I don't find the threads funny. I read them. I want to. They are different to the inherent drivel that appears most of the time.
A little cheeky, like a naughty boy but not highly intellectual nor side splitting.
I'd like more though.
Time will tell."
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm always wary of people who refer to themselves in the third person...
Also people whose threads should clearly be posted in 'stories and fantasies' "
Story and fantasy... no way? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wish I had remembered you at the end of last year. You're a definite contender for funniest forumite.
I don't find the threads funny. I read them. I want to. They are different to the inherent drivel that appears most of the time.
A little cheeky, like a naughty boy but not highly intellectual nor side splitting.
I'd like more though.
Time will tell."
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I can only guess that a sware is a soiree"
Either that or his evenings are spent muttering profanities to his guests because they won't do what he wants... |
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I love it 
his posts 
#dukeless 