Stairs are an necessary evil, aren't they? We need them in order to gain access to things that would be otherwise unavailable. Gods bless the stairs, we'd be bloody buggered without them. Three cheers for stairs, and I won't hear a single bad word about them.
Apart from the following...
Bastards one and all of the pricks. Still smugly ignoring the 1995 Disability Discrimination Act, the cunts can all go gargle on their own faeces like the bunch of irredeemable fuckstains that they are. Admittedly, many of their most glaring failings are the fault of the gobsmashingly inconsiderate dickheads who spend all day every day sprinting up and down them for no apparent reason.
I think what I'd really like to know is: why the fuck do certain people behave this way? And yes, I'm well aware that the issue could be instantly solved by the amputation of the culprit's legs, but that feels a bit cheaty.
Suggestions please. I am in an extremely foul mood.
(and if you're one of those 2 stairs at a time cheats, or don't keep to the right don't even bother) |
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"We moved to a bungalow. Stairs? What stairs?
I feel your pain, there are certain places my mum can't access due to stairs or steep slopes."
I sold the bungalow that ma dad built about 5 years ago, there were still stairs up to it though  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Aha we have a bungalow with a grand total of 2 steps into it feels fantastic knowing we don't have to walk d*unkenly upstairs to get to bed  "
That would be too confusing, I would d*unkenly sleep in the kitchen... stairs give proper order to life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have damaged,painful knees. We have a 3 storey house with 2 flights of stairs and 1 of those is an extra long flight too. G and i sleep in the attic bedroom. At the end of a long, tiring, painful day at work i struggle to get up 1 flight of stairs let alone 2  |
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"We moved to a bungalow. Stairs? What stairs?
I feel your pain, there are certain places my mum can't access due to stairs or steep slopes.
I sold the bungalow that ma dad built about 5 years ago, there were still stairs up to it though "
Some we saw needed climbing gear to access... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Stairs will be the death of me. I've always hated stairs in my childhood home we had wooden open backed stairs n I always went down them on my bottom rite up until my teen. I also always go down stairs one at a time and always leading with my right leg. All 3 times I've broken bones it's been by falling down stairs. Xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Compliments to you OP, read your post three times back to back and still laughing, it's brilliant.
Anyone who can devote the phrase "the cunts can all go gargle on their own faeces like the bunch of irredeemable fuckstains that they are" to stairs should run for office, it's priceless.
I may consider plagiarising it as a response to the abuse I get when I decline to meet some of the men who message me! Sadly the eloquence would be wasted on them.
I dislike stairs with a vengeance but that's because I have a balance disorder which makes them anathema to me, as are "the gobsmashingly inconsiderate dickheads who spend all day every day sprinting up and down them" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My house has been adapted with 2 downstairs bedrooms for my sons as stairs we're a problem. Now it's me that has to brace the stairs and I thank god we had an extra bannister put on as I always seem to lean to the wrong side x |
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