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Cheesy one liners

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I'll start em off.

Are you from Ireland by any chance?

Cos my penis is Dublin.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If i said you had a beautiful penis would you put it inside me?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

How much does a polar bear weigh?...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Excuse me.

Do you think these napkins smell like chloroform?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Would you like to come back to mine for some cheese?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Are you a school because I want to shoot kids inside you"

Thats terrible :/

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

That rohipnol taste nice?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Turns pockets out]

Hello! Want to see my elephant?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Are you a school because I want to shoot kids inside you

Thats terrible :/ "

Lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I hope you got pet insurance?tonight im gonna destroy that pussy

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By * Kiwis and a BananaMan over a year ago

Part of your 5 a day

Does your friend like apples? Cause I want to be in cider (inside her)

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By *iamondjoeMan over a year ago

Glastonbury

I just shit my pants - can I get in yours?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you istead?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Does your friend like apples? Cause I want to be in cider (inside her) "

Oh dear oh dear

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I just shit my pants - can I get in yours?

Um..no thanks

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you istead? "

...possib-lee.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Roses are red violets are blue I have a knife get in the van

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There are 8 planets in the universe, tonight there will be 7 after i destroy uranus

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Your like my little toe, im gonna bang you on every piece of furniture at home

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you istead? "

Love it lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hope you like the taste of chicken, because my cock tastes fowl...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Hope you like the taste of chicken, because my cock tastes fowl...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Your like my little toe, im gonna bang you on every piece of furniture at home"

that made me chuckle

L x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Imma treat yo ass like a plate at a Greek wedding

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Roses are red violets are blue I have a knife get in the van"

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Imma treat yo ass like a plate at a Greek wedding

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Someone once said to me

"You got any Jewish in you?"

Me "no"

"You want some?"

L x

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Someone once said to me

"You got any Jewish in you?"

Me "no"

"You want some?"

L x"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is your dad a thief? Because he stole the stars from the skies and put them in your eyes"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If i said you had a beautiful penis would you put it inside me?"

Read this 20 mins ago and cant get the Dr Hook song out of my head now lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Lovely dress, can i talk you out of it?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Your like my little toe, im gonna bang you on every piece of furniture at home"

That one would work on me!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How much does a polar bear weigh?..."

13 and a half stone

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"How much does a polar bear weigh?...

13 and a half stone

Brilliant

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How much does a polar bear weigh?..."

Enough to break the ice

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you were a drug I'd overdose

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My face will be leaving in half an hour, I'd like you to be on it..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Your like my little toe, im gonna bang you on every piece of furniture at home

that made me chuckle

L x"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I feel like a squirrel, cos I want to bury my nutts on you!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Are you a school because I want to shoot kids inside you"

Eweèewwwwwww

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Are you a school because I want to shoot kids inside you

Eweèewwwwwww

Lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"How much does a polar bear weigh?...

Enough to break the ice

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I feel like a squirrel, cos I want to bury my nutts on you!"

This made me chuckle

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By *evaquitCouple over a year ago

Catthorpe

Do you live on a chicken farm? Cause you sure know how to raise a cock!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Do you live on a chicken farm? Cause you sure know how to raise a cock!"

Some might say my mum raised a cock.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You know the way you curl your index finger up and back as a visual way of saying come here?

You do that with your little finger. When the woman comes over say "If I can make you come with my little finger just imagine what I can do with the rest of my body" lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Excuse me.

Do you think these napkins smell like chloroform?

My favourite haha

H x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not exactly a one liner, but...

Do you want a fuck?

No?

Then do you mind lying still while I have one?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Excuse me.

Do you think these napkins smell like chloroform?

My favourite haha

H x"

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By *yldstyleWoman over a year ago

A world of my own

I can't taste my lips, can I try yours?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Your eyes are like wrenches ...

Every time I look into them I feel my nuts tighten

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't use one liners.

Lately I'm gonna start with getting my cock out. Hopefully it will start some kind of small talk.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Drop em blossom, your mother did

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By *ubSirVient-DefinitionCouple over a year ago

dukinfield

Don't worry about the funny taste, just drink your fucking wine!

Works every time!

**disclaimer this is acctually a joke, I never mention the funny taste**

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By *ubSirVient-DefinitionCouple over a year ago

dukinfield

"My face will be leaving in half an hour, I'd like you to be on it.."

Kevin Bloody Wilson, do you fuck on first dates. Awesome song lol

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By *vadownMan over a year ago

Wickham

Word of the day is legs. Come on baby let's go spread the word.

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By *edgeend6Couple over a year ago

Southampton

Are you a Taxidermist? OK, wanna try stuffing my pussy anyway?

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By *tticusFMan over a year ago

Newark

Want to come and watch porn on my 60 inch flat screen mirror?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Want to come and watch porn on my 60 inch flat screen mirror? "

Clever

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