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Military men away from home
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This is a genuine question to see if what I'm thinking might be the case.
It's not prompted by anyone on this site but I thought here would be a good place to ask.
So my question is are military men out in dangerous places more likely to think they love a woman they chat with because they are in such an unpleasant place and need to feel as if there is someone there for them?
Or if they think they are in love very quickly is it just a good old red flag? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can only speak for myself when I say no. We don't fall in love any quicker when we're away. I personally didn't have time to think on much else. It's nice to know someone is waiting back home but it doesn't mean I'm going to fall for someone any quicker |
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"I can only speak for myself when I say no. We don't fall in love any quicker when we're away. I personally didn't have time to think on much else. It's nice to know someone is waiting back home but it doesn't mean I'm going to fall for someone any quicker "
Thank you, red flag it is then  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think any sane military man will not think he's in love with someone he chats to. Regardless of where they are. That goes for non military too. I also think many are good at manipulation....they aren't all bonkers  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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for me it is red flag. i knew a young soldier who was bomb disposal and was in those dangerous places overseas. He played hard to relieve stress but no way would he jump into love or think he was in love because he knew he would not be able to think oh her and safely do his job. When he did fall in love it was gradual and certain
hope this makes sense |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hi Kinky!
I think that being away on service must be incredibly difficult, and someone they have a personal connection with from home would be comforting. Being in such an environment must encore stronger feelings. However, some people do tend to have a personality where they fall quickly and for me, those situations have never worked out. |
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Thanks everyone, this is what I was thinking then I wondered if it was a reaction to the stressful situation they are in.
So now I don't know what to do because he says he's feels so much better now he's chatting to me. So I'd feel bad to 'dump' him 
I sure do seem to attract them  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you enjoy chatting to him then there's no need to dump him. Just be wary. Like you would with anyone that falls that quickly.
I've had a couple of "dear johns" when I've been away, mainly because they couldn't handle the time being apart.
Again any sane man military or not will get over that wether home or away
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You need to remember a lot of people in the military are very young and join young. Are in a group of likeminded people for long periods of time. Often they have peers as in cpl, sgt who are fairly emotionally backwards, for lack of a better way of putting it.
They also have really long boring periods to dwell on build up and fantasise about dates or meetings.
If you think he met you a couple of times then went back to the big green fuck around, he may not see many females who don't outrank or are not completely unobtainable.
I joined at 16 left at 22 and couldn't write a check or have a mature emotional relationship for ages. It's not all service people but a bigish group. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You need to remember a lot of people in the military are very young and join young. Are in a group of likeminded people for long periods of time. Often they have peers as in cpl, sgt who are fairly emotionally backwards, for lack of a better way of putting it.
They also have really long boring periods to dwell on build up and fantasise about dates or meetings.
If you think he met you a couple of times then went back to the big green fuck around, he may not see many females who don't outrank or are not completely unobtainable.
I joined at 16 left at 22 and couldn't write a check or have a mature emotional relationship for ages. It's not all service people but a bigish group. "
 Totally agree with this. Particularly the long boring periods with lots of time to think/fantasize and dwell.
Perhaps he is having one of those moments? Extreme highs and lows are quite common in forces men I find xx |
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He's not from this site so I can say that we've only chatted for 2 days and never met.
I appreciate all the replies and I think I shall proceed with caution but not upset him.
He is out saving the world  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You need to remember a lot of people in the military are very young and join young. Are in a group of likeminded people for long periods of time. Often they have peers as in cpl, sgt who are fairly emotionally backwards, for lack of a better way of putting it.
They also have really long boring periods to dwell on build up and fantasise about dates or meetings.
If you think he met you a couple of times then went back to the big green fuck around, he may not see many females who don't outrank or are not completely unobtainable.
I joined at 16 left at 22 and couldn't write a check or have a mature emotional relationship for ages. It's not all service people but a bigish group. Totally agree with this. Particularly the long boring periods with lots of time to think/fantasize and dwell.
Perhaps he is having one of those moments? Extreme highs and lows are quite common in forces men I find xx"
I spent quite a lot of time gazing across Belfast thinking that a guy at home, well near where our battalion were uk based, wouldn't be wanting to touch me with how rancid, dirty and generally grubby I often was for that 4 months. Also for fairly obvious reasons I couldn't talk to people about missing him either. Or call or write.
He was with someone else by the time I got home.
So I had revenge sex with his best freind.  |
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"If you enjoy chatting to him then there's no need to dump him. Just be wary. Like you would with anyone that falls that quickly.
I've had a couple of "dear johns" when I've been away, mainly because they couldn't handle the time being apart.
Again any sane man military or not will get over that wether home or away
"
You're right |
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"You need to remember a lot of people in the military are very young and join young. Are in a group of likeminded people for long periods of time. Often they have peers as in cpl, sgt who are fairly emotionally backwards, for lack of a better way of putting it.
They also have really long boring periods to dwell on build up and fantasise about dates or meetings.
If you think he met you a couple of times then went back to the big green fuck around, he may not see many females who don't outrank or are not completely unobtainable.
I joined at 16 left at 22 and couldn't write a check or have a mature emotional relationship for ages. It's not all service people but a bigish group. "
He's not as young as that but you could be right. |
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"I spent quite a lot of time gazing across Belfast thinking that a guy at home, well near where our battalion were uk based, wouldn't be wanting to touch me with how rancid, dirty and generally grubby I often was for that 4 months. Also for fairly obvious reasons I couldn't talk to people about missing him either. Or call or write.
He was with someone else by the time I got home.
So I had revenge sex with his best freind. "
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"I spent quite a lot of time gazing across Belfast thinking that a guy at home, well near where our battalion were uk based, wouldn't be wanting to touch me with how rancid, dirty and generally grubby I often was for that 4 months. Also for fairly obvious reasons I couldn't talk to people about missing him either. Or call or write.
He was with someone else by the time I got home.
So I had revenge sex with his best freind. "
Pressed the button too soon, was going to say that's actually a very sad tale  |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
Having worked for the Army and met (and played with) a lot of soldiers I can say they are the best fun ever, but don't seem the type to fall in love on a whim. Maybe he's saying what he thinks you want to hear. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I spent quite a lot of time gazing across Belfast thinking that a guy at home, well near where our battalion were uk based, wouldn't be wanting to touch me with how rancid, dirty and generally grubby I often was for that 4 months. Also for fairly obvious reasons I couldn't talk to people about missing him either. Or call or write.
He was with someone else by the time I got home.
So I had revenge sex with his best freind.
Pressed the button too soon, was going to say that's actually a very sad tale "
She loved it, so that was good 
I wouldn't feel that sad to be honest I had a relationship every leave and most weekends, in loads of towns across the UK.
And the rotter missed me all toned and tanned after our next job .... Kenya for 10 weeks. |
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"Having worked for the Army and met (and played with) a lot of soldiers I can say they are the best fun ever, but don't seem the type to fall in love on a whim. Maybe he's saying what he thinks you want to hear."
I'd think that but it's not the usual hey babe stuff, he seems genuine. I don't fall for romantic stuff and I've tried to put him off.
There's no doubt he's lonely and probably would like female company. |
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"Pressed the button too soon, was going to say that's actually a very sad tale
She loved it, so that was good
I wouldn't feel that sad to be honest I had a relationship every leave and most weekends, in loads of towns across the UK.
And the rotter missed me all toned and tanned after our next job .... Kenya for 10 weeks. "
That's ok then |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You need to remember a lot of people in the military are very young and join young. Are in a group of likeminded people for long periods of time. Often they have peers as in cpl, sgt who are fairly emotionally backwards, for lack of a better way of putting it.
They also have really long boring periods to dwell on build up and fantasise about dates or meetings.
If you think he met you a couple of times then went back to the big green fuck around, he may not see many females who don't outrank or are not completely unobtainable.
I joined at 16 left at 22 and couldn't write a check or have a mature emotional relationship for ages. It's not all service people but a bigish group. "
I find that first paragraph extremely insulting. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He's not from this site so I can say that we've only chatted for 2 days and never met.
I appreciate all the replies and I think I shall proceed with caution but not upset him.
He is out saving the world "
Allegedly.
I agree with most of the above- if anything they are less likely to want deep emotional bonds in a short space of time x |
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"Allegedly.
I agree with most of the above- if anything they are less likely to want deep emotional bonds in a short space of time x"
I agree, I wondered maybe they would think they did rather than actually do. If that makes sense? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Having worked for the Army and met (and played with) a lot of soldiers I can say they are the best fun ever, but don't seem the type to fall in love on a whim. Maybe he's saying what he thinks you want to hear.
I'd think that but it's not the usual hey babe stuff, he seems genuine. I don't fall for romantic stuff and I've tried to put him off.
There's no doubt he's lonely and probably would like female company."
Is there any chance your getting wooed online by half a platoon giving him advice? He may have half an MT section or all the cooks on camp telling him what to say?
We used to get all the contact magazines and pen pall things and lonley hearts ads, I've known guys write and later on text service loads of ladies at once. Can't win the lottery if you don't buy a ticket.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Allegedly.
I agree with most of the above- if anything they are less likely to want deep emotional bonds in a short space of time x
I agree, I wondered maybe they would think they did rather than actually do. If that makes sense?"
In love with the idea of being in love? |
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"Is there any chance your getting wooed online by half a platoon giving him advice? He may have half an MT section or all the cooks on camp telling him what to say?
We used to get all the contact magazines and pen pall things and lonley hearts ads, I've known guys write and later on text service loads of ladies at once. Can't win the lottery if you don't buy a ticket.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You need to remember a lot of people in the military are very young and join young. Are in a group of likeminded people for long periods of time. Often they have peers as in cpl, sgt who are fairly emotionally backwards, for lack of a better way of putting it.
They also have really long boring periods to dwell on build up and fantasise about dates or meetings.
If you think he met you a couple of times then went back to the big green fuck around, he may not see many females who don't outrank or are not completely unobtainable.
I joined at 16 left at 22 and couldn't write a check or have a mature emotional relationship for ages. It's not all service people but a bigish group.
I find that first paragraph extremely insulting. "
You can be as insulted as you like mate. I was an infantry junior leader, then I was a squaddy. My sections 2ic when I joined battalion was an idiot my section commander was a bully and my Sargent was a manipulative bully.
I was chuffed when I went to support company
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"Is there any chance your getting wooed online by half a platoon giving him advice? He may have half an MT section or all the cooks on camp telling him what to say?
We used to get all the contact magazines and pen pall things and lonley hearts ads, I've known guys write and later on text service loads of ladies at once. Can't win the lottery if you don't buy a ticket.
"
Keep pressing the wrong button 
I don't think so, I'm wise to that sort of thing. It's the way he talks that seems like it's not made up.
And I'm not into being wooed as such. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Men are just like us women, complicated.
Some men say anything to get in a gals pants, but often you find a romantic sod who just yearns for the love of a good/bad woman.
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"People sometimes say what they think you want to hear to get what they want.
Some people like playing a game with people on the net.
Some people are not in the services but say they are.
"
You're very right of course.
He seems to be in the military if his pics are anything to go by.
He's not on this site but I'm still not going to say what he's said. It's not the usual stuff these guys come out with.
I'm going to treat is as a red flag if he gets any worse but in the meantime keep him company if it helps.
If it's all bollocks I won't lose anything. If it's true I'm not averse to cheering up someone in tough times |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is there any chance your getting wooed online by half a platoon giving him advice? He may have half an MT section or all the cooks on camp telling him what to say?
We used to get all the contact magazines and pen pall things and lonley hearts ads, I've known guys write and later on text service loads of ladies at once. Can't win the lottery if you don't buy a ticket.
Keep pressing the wrong button
I don't think so, I'm wise to that sort of thing. It's the way he talks that seems like it's not made up.
And I'm not into being wooed as such."
Depending on what he actually does (don't say if you do know) he might actually be quite lonley and just want a freind.
You know one with a brain. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just take it with a pinch of salt for now Kinky and enjoy yourself. If he comes on a bit strong tell him, he might not realise.
And trust your gut instinct. |
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"Depending on what he actually does (don't say if you do know) he might actually be quite lonley and just want a freind.
You know one with a brain. "
I wouldn't say but I don't know other than a location.
I'm sure it is loneliness if he's not a scammer |
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"Just take it with a pinch of salt for now Kinky and enjoy yourself. If he comes on a bit strong tell him, he might not realise.
And trust your gut instinct."
Yes you're right, I have been telling him.
Always, and my instinct was red flags. But then I thought maybe it was 'normal' for military guys away in dodgy places.
Seems it's not so I'm back to flag waving |
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"One word. Nigeria.
These scammers love being a fake military man
Maybe
If he needs £1,000 to get home you know what to do.  "
Tell him I'll put it in his Nigerian back account
He's said he's not back till April. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hats off to you op. I wouldn't be even entertaining discussion about this guy. ..let alone chatting with him. Chatting can't hurt if you have the time and inclination, but that is all I'd treat it as. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not military but when conversing via text there is a much larger % of a person you make up in your mind as an ideal.
As such you end up with the person on a pedestal and feelings for the imagined person they are in your head not the person they are in reality. |
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"Hats off to you op. I wouldn't be even entertaining discussion about this guy. ..let alone chatting with him. Chatting can't hurt if you have the time and inclination, but that is all I'd treat it as."
I'm just chatting, nothing else. |
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"Not military but when conversing via text there is a much larger % of a person you make up in your mind as an ideal.
As such you end up with the person on a pedestal and feelings for the imagined person they are in your head not the person they are in reality."
That's what I thought it might be. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a British student email me from Nigeria once, she said bandits had murdered her whole family and she needed cash to get back to England.
I told her to nip and see the bandits as they are quiding it in. |
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"Thanks everyone, this is what I was thinking then I wondered if it was a reaction to the stressful situation they are in.
So now I don't know what to do because he says he's feels so much better now he's chatting to me. So I'd feel bad to 'dump' him
I sure do seem to attract them "
I think it's important to do what is right for you, even of you're respecting him completely.
I'd perhaps lead him to it gradually, if I was concerned. But having had something similar, I think that clear incompatibility is helpful for us, as a call to action. |
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"I think it's important to do what is right for you, even of you're respecting him completely.
I'd perhaps lead him to it gradually, if I was concerned. But having had something similar, I think that clear incompatibility is helpful for us, as a call to action. "
You're right |
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"Blimey, that's complicated
I don't know how military stuff works so if he can message that means he might not be in Iraq?"
He could be. Its not impossible. Does he have a dead wife/kid? Or has he slipped up in his chat as to where he is/is from? |
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"Blimey, that's complicated
I don't know how military stuff works so if he can message that means he might not be in Iraq?
He could be. Its not impossible. Does he have a dead wife/kid? Or has he slipped up in his chat as to where he is/is from?"
No dead people mentioned, we've not really talked abut that but on the app he is localish to me.
I can't fathom it out but I've learned that his behaviour is not the 'norm' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Blimey, that's complicated
I don't know how military stuff works so if he can message that means he might not be in Iraq?"
You read my comment? Thought I better delete it cos he hasn't even told me exactly what he does and I've known him almost 3 years.
I don't know about military guys either but the one I knew told me a few things when we were face to face talking like he told me once where he was going but would never write it in a text or even talk about it on the phone. |
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"Blimey, that's complicated
I don't know how military stuff works so if he can message that means he might not be in Iraq?
He could be. Its not impossible. Does he have a dead wife/kid? Or has he slipped up in his chat as to where he is/is from?"
Oh yeah - I feel sorry for the guys who really DO have a dead wife or child, because that's an instant block from me I've heard it from so many fakes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I spent just over 22 years in the army. At 18 I did my basic training near Birmingham. Now I was a shy lad but that soon disappeared. The local girls who used the naafi help me over come that. At 21 I met my ex wife and we stayed together for 20 years. I spent quite long periods away and can honestly say that I never really missed my home life. At times my ex would cross my mind but I was married to the army and as time went on my military responsibilities grew. I missed the birth of both my children. That is my only regret. I'm a very good father and grandfather but my children needed me to be around more than I was. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I spent just over 22 years in the army. At 18 I did my basic training near Birmingham. Now I was a shy lad but that soon disappeared. The local girls who used the naafi help me over come that. At 21 I met my ex wife and we stayed together for 20 years. I spent quite long periods away and can honestly say that I never really missed my home life. At times my ex would cross my mind but I was married to the army and as time went on my military responsibilities grew. I missed the birth of both my children. That is my only regret. I'm a very good father and grandfather but my children needed me to be around more than I was. "
I find this response so endearing. Refreshingly honest and open. The only thing I'd say is this; Your children are still your children, they are adults longer than they are "kids".. so you have the rest of your life to be there for them and make it count. Yes you have missed things, but you now have the opportunity to be there |
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My first tour was twenty years ago.
We didn't have Internet and phone calls were a luxury.
So lots of blueys (free airmail) and a popular pastime was writing to pen pals from soldier magazine.
Certainly most of the lads were quite manipulative in trying to set up 'dates' for Rnr.
So possible telling you what he thinks you want to hear.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My first tour was twenty years ago.
We didn't have Internet and phone calls were a luxury.
So lots of blueys (free airmail) and a popular pastime was writing to pen pals from soldier magazine.
Certainly most of the lads were quite manipulative in trying to set up 'dates' for Rnr.
So possible telling you what he thinks you want to hear.
Don't forget the phone cards !
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think most will tell you what they think you want to hear. I've chatted to and met guys who are in the forces on this site and from dating sites. And most give you the same bs. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My first tour was twenty years ago.
We didn't have Internet and phone calls were a luxury.
So lots of blueys (free airmail) and a popular pastime was writing to pen pals from soldier magazine.
Certainly most of the lads were quite manipulative in trying to set up 'dates' for Rnr.
So possible telling you what he thinks you want to hear.
Don't forget the phone cards !
"
I used to swap my blueys for fags.
Things really picked up for the single squadie with mobile phones, free phone chat and date lines (telefun and the velvet underground spring to mind) and Zed the text messaging service.
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Hmmmm, this is a toughie,
Although I'm no longer serving I still work overseas in hostile environments for extended periods of time. Some of this time in fact a great deal is spent in almost solitary confinement for one of a better word. Although I'm not locked in a cage 24/7 I am majorly restricted on my movements and for the majority of the time I'm the only English speaker there.
I do however speak the local language to an extent. The internet is my only real link to "Real life" shall we say and really my only life line that keeps me sane.
For those that I chat too or become close to I do feel a lot more of a bond with and I suppose it would be quite easy to fall for someone very quickly in these conditions.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The fun one was prc320 - dipole antenna - 'hello portishead, hello portishead this is defender, this is deffender...connect to landline ***********'
'Hello defender, this is portishead this is portishead, connecting you now'
'Hi mum, happy birthday'
I had an interview without coffee for that. |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
Do not use the forum to try and contact people who have BLOCKED you
The above is a forum rule so if someone has you blocked be that an out and out block or filters that mean you can't mail them then you can't use the forum to ask people to unblock you.
Thanks all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do not use the forum to try and contact people who have BLOCKED you
The above is a forum rule so if someone has you blocked be that an out and out block or filters that mean you can't mail them then you can't use the forum to ask people to unblock you.
Thanks all"
I think this was directed at me as comments have been removed. It was inadvertent and I was trying to assist the OP who has merely chosen not to receive private mail from other ladies. There is no axe to grind here. |
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"I spent just over 22 years in the army. At 18 I did my basic training near Birmingham. Now I was a shy lad but that soon disappeared. The local girls who used the naafi help me over come that. At 21 I met my ex wife and we stayed together for 20 years. I spent quite long periods away and can honestly say that I never really missed my home life. At times my ex would cross my mind but I was married to the army and as time went on my military responsibilities grew. I missed the birth of both my children. That is my only regret. I'm a very good father and grandfather but my children needed me to be around more than I was. I find this response so endearing. Refreshingly honest and open. The only thing I'd say is this; Your children are still your children, they are adults longer than they are "kids".. so you have the rest of your life to be there for them and make it count. Yes you have missed things, but you now have the opportunity to be there "
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"I think most will tell you what they think you want to hear. I've chatted to and met guys who are in the forces on this site and from dating sites. And most give you the same bs. "
As do some civilians  |
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"Hmmmm, this is a toughie,
Although I'm no longer serving I still work overseas in hostile environments for extended periods of time. Some of this time in fact a great deal is spent in almost solitary confinement for one of a better word. Although I'm not locked in a cage 24/7 I am majorly restricted on my movements and for the majority of the time I'm the only English speaker there.
I do however speak the local language to an extent. The internet is my only real link to "Real life" shall we say and really my only life line that keeps me sane.
For those that I chat too or become close to I do feel a lot more of a bond with and I suppose it would be quite easy to fall for someone very quickly in these conditions.
"
That's what I was thinking, though it doesn't seem to be 'normal' so I'm now treating him as not for real |
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Scam, scam, scam, scam, scam would be going through my mind. Either give him enough rope to hang himself with and pass all the information onto the police via action fraud, or block and move on.
XxX |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been viewing it all with suspicion since last night.
He's got pics of him in uniform but I've not noticed there's a US flag on the arm.
It's now become a bit of a detective game "
hahaha I love playing dectective when an idiot is playing me like a fool!!
Give him enough rope and he will hang himself |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
" I was trying to assist the OP who has merely chosen not to receive private mail from other ladies. There is no axe to grind here.
Agree "
The rule still applies. Maybe it is best for mods not to give a reminder next time if it isn't taken very well. Of course that means a straight ban instead.
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"I've been viewing it all with suspicion since last night.
He's got pics of him in uniform but I've not noticed there's a US flag on the arm.
It's now become a bit of a detective game hahaha I love playing dectective when an idiot is playing me like a fool!!
Give him enough rope and he will hang himself "
I'm sure he will |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I was trying to assist the OP who has merely chosen not to receive private mail from other ladies. There is no axe to grind here.
Agree
The rule still applies. Maybe it is best for mods not to give a reminder next time if it isn't taken very well. Of course that means a straight ban instead.
"
I do like Rugby when she's all assertive |
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"I've been viewing it all with suspicion since last night.
He's got pics of him in uniform but I've not noticed there's a US flag on the arm.
It's now become a bit of a detective game "
It may even be a fake pic of a dead soldier I am afraid. The fakes often reveal themselves by quoting US references too - talk of going to Westpoint or Berkeley for instance. Their military terms are often incorrect and they say things like 'I will like to get t know you' - that's a classic. They often pretend to be abroad to they can entrap people without actually meeting them. Caveat emptor. |
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"It may even be a fake pic of a dead soldier I am afraid. The fakes often reveal themselves by quoting US references too - talk of going to Westpoint or Berkeley for instance. Their military terms are often incorrect and they say things like 'I will like to get t know you' - that's a classic. They often pretend to be abroad to they can entrap people without actually meeting them. Caveat emptor."
Oh
He's not mentioned anything like that so far. |
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"It may even be a fake pic of a dead soldier I am afraid. The fakes often reveal themselves by quoting US references too - talk of going to Westpoint or Berkeley for instance. Their military terms are often incorrect and they say things like 'I will like to get t know you' - that's a classic. They often pretend to be abroad to they can entrap people without actually meeting them. Caveat emptor.
Oh
He's not mentioned anything like that so far."
Good, well I hope he's just a lonely soldier then lol, but at least you have your eyes wide open! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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He could be genuine.
I've chatted to a fair few soldiers over the years and the only thing dodgy about them was that they wanted me to watch them wank on cam.
Keep an open mind OP. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He could be genuine.
I've chatted to a fair few soldiers over the years and the only thing dodgy about them was that they wanted me to watch them wank on cam.
Keep an open mind OP."
Couldn't do that sort of thing in my day the internet hadn't been invented |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He could be genuine.
I've chatted to a fair few soldiers over the years and the only thing dodgy about them was that they wanted me to watch them wank on cam.
Keep an open mind OP.
Couldn't do that sort of thing in my day the internet hadn't been invented "
Good job, i'd have watched you  |
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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago
secret town |
"This is a genuine question to see if what I'm thinking might be the case.
It's not prompted by anyone on this site but I thought here would be a good place to ask.
So my question is are military men out in dangerous places more likely to think they love a woman they chat with because they are in such an unpleasant place and need to feel as if there is someone there for them?
Or if they think they are in love very quickly is it just a good old red flag?"
No
Majority of the forces men rather be single when they go on tour
I was on forces penpals site for 10yrs, use to send packages to these men for a morale boost
Heard many a story and none were about love or gf's back home! |
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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago
secret town |
"Blimey, that's complicated
I don't know how military stuff works so if he can message that means he might not be in Iraq?"
They not allowed to text by phone
They can only email or write letters
90% of the military are not in Iraq anymore only a handful are out there training the police |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think any sane military man will not think he's in love with someone he chats to. Regardless of where they are. That goes for non military too. I also think many are good at manipulation....they aren't all bonkers "
This would match more closely with my experience of living on base.
There are many military men that aren't very bright. There are also quite a few military men who are manipulative shits who will use nasty tactics to get what they want.
I'd say 'just like the rest of the population', however I don't think it is. I think the environment and the training can intensify it. (Which is why I refuse to meet military men.) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Military or not, I don't think any sane person imagines themselves "in love" with someone they have only communicated with online. Far too much of the reality is hidden, the entire persona may be a fabrication. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think most will tell you what they think you want to hear. I've chatted to and met guys who are in the forces on this site and from dating sites. And most give you the same bs.
As do some civilians "
Haha yes they do as we both have experienced |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you think someone's pictures of them in uniform are fake, or they are using pictures of themselves dressed up in a uniform they are got online, go to the MOD website, look through the different regiments and you can easily tell
1 if they are actually wearing a British uniform
2 if they have the right badges and other regimental items (look at belt and beret combo) also berets, we spent hours shaping them, if they have a big cowpat or frisbee on their head, it screems fake.
3 if it even looks like it fits them, if they look like they just got slung through silvermans front display while dipped in glue or look like a fat waster who can't iron a shirt. They will be fake.
I had a guy on another site, tell me his dog tags were a souvineer from his time in the SBS, and they were square American ones. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think any sane military man will not think he's in love with someone he chats to. Regardless of where they are. That goes for non military too. I also think many are good at manipulation....they aren't all bonkers
This would match more closely with my experience of living on base.
There are many military men that aren't very bright. There are also quite a few military men who are manipulative shits who will use nasty tactics to get what they want.
I'd say 'just like the rest of the population', however I don't think it is. I think the environment and the training can intensify it. (Which is why I refuse to meet military men.)"
There are also some very intelligent people who sign on the dotted line. Some leave the military and lead good decent lives. I spent 22 years in the forces and met people from all walks of life. Some highly intelligent with the most awful manners and some with a low IQ but with the kindness of saints.
At the end of the day I love our forces. Especially the infantry. They do the most unimaginable dirty job and they do it so we the civilian population can sleep at night. |
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"He could be genuine.
I've chatted to a fair few soldiers over the years and the only thing dodgy about them was that they wanted me to watch them wank on cam.
Keep an open mind OP."
I don't get the attraction myself.......  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think any sane military man will not think he's in love with someone he chats to. Regardless of where they are. That goes for non military too. I also think many are good at manipulation....they aren't all bonkers
This would match more closely with my experience of living on base.
There are many military men that aren't very bright. There are also quite a few military men who are manipulative shits who will use nasty tactics to get what they want.
I'd say 'just like the rest of the population', however I don't think it is. I think the environment and the training can intensify it. (Which is why I refuse to meet military men.)
There are also some very intelligent people who sign on the dotted line. Some leave the military and lead good decent lives. I spent 22 years in the forces and met people from all walks of life. Some highly intelligent with the most awful manners and some with a low IQ but with the kindness of saints.
At the end of the day I love our forces. Especially the infantry. They do the most unimaginable dirty job and they do it so we the civilian population can sleep at night."
Oh... I think the manipulative ones are *very* intelligent. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"He could be genuine.
I've chatted to a fair few soldiers over the years and the only thing dodgy about them was that they wanted me to watch them wank on cam.
Keep an open mind OP.
I don't get the attraction
myself....... "
One man and his wanger, rubbing, moaning, cum, what's not to love? |
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"He could be genuine.
I've chatted to a fair few soldiers over the years and the only thing dodgy about them was that they wanted me to watch them wank on cam.
Keep an open mind OP.
I don't get the attraction
myself.......
One man and his wanger, rubbing, moaning, cum, what's not to love? "
PMSL - not my thang....but loving the outlook |
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I was with my Ex wife 3 weeks before my first tour of Afghanistan. In all honesty I could say if being deployed had any bearing on my falling more in love with her. We had fallen in love very fast in the 3 weeks before I went away. So I guess the seed was already sown. But I did get a real buzz of her letters and a weekly phone call (when I could). Also that fact that she stood by me for all that time made realise how serious she was for me; so maybe subconsciously I reciprocated this seriousness.
Personally I would say be very wary of anyone's perception of love until you have spent some real time around them. That is just a general rule for any situation I would say.
Interrupted85 - You'll find all sorts of intelligence levels in the Forces. There are plenty of intelligent people in the Forces. The nature of many of the jobs require a fair degree of intelligence. Plus there are different types of intelligence. And just like everyone else in the world you'll find some descent people and some dicks. People in the Forces are normal people with normal backgrounds too. Being a dick is not part of the recruiting criteria (except for Snowdrops, its mandatory). Sorry your experiences have left you with such a wrapt view. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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With regards to the location query on most sites if you turn off location in settings or go out of the country to an area where the service is not available then you get your location set as your home area
M |
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Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him "
Give it to me I'm being sent on the same mission |
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"Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him
Give it to me I'm being sent on the same mission "
Ha ha, I'm currently trying to find a Western Union |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him
Give it to me I'm being sent on the same mission
Ha ha, I'm currently trying to find a Western Union "
Safer bet I'd say I may spend it on stuff |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him "
|
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"Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him
Give it to me I'm being sent on the same mission
Ha ha, I'm currently trying to find a Western Union
Safer bet I'd say I may spend it on stuff "
I'm going to tell him I've sent it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him
Give it to me I'm being sent on the same mission
Ha ha, I'm currently trying to find a Western Union
Safer bet I'd say I may spend it on stuff
I'm going to tell him I've sent it "
You are a nice lady |
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"Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him
Give it to me I'm being sent on the same mission
Ha ha, I'm currently trying to find a Western Union
Safer bet I'd say I may spend it on stuff
I'm going to tell him I've sent it
You are a nice lady "
Because he's a nice man |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him
Give it to me I'm being sent on the same mission
Ha ha, I'm currently trying to find a Western Union
Safer bet I'd say I may spend it on stuff
I'm going to tell him I've sent it
You are a nice lady
Because he's a nice man "
That's good to hear worth the wait I'd say |
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"Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him "
I knew it - felt it in my water lol! |
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Do you think he is getting 240v AC frequently applied to his testicals and a pineapple rammed up his anus right now by bad guys because the woman who he trusted did not send him the $500?
How do you sleep at night? You must drink a bucket of horlicks? |
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"Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him
I knew it - felt it in my water lol! "
|
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"Do you think he is getting 240v AC frequently applied to his testicals and a pineapple rammed up his anus right now by bad guys because the woman who he trusted did not send him the $500?
How do you sleep at night? You must drink a bucket of horlicks?"
I don't drink any horlicks |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I was in 42 unit Royal Marines for 15 years and when I was away especially in the gulf to be honest all you thought about was your next mission and staying alive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was in 42 unit Royal Marines for 15 years and when I was away especially in the gulf to be honest all you thought about was your next mission and staying alive
Which makes total sense."
Depends how far back and if they have to send washing forward I guess Hun. I met a chap once we met a few times before he got sent on tour. While he was away I sent him loads of mail and boxes to cheer him up even sent him a friends valentine card as knew the othe rlads would get stuff of there gfs. We got really close in those few months, we used to face time most days when he wasn't out on patrol. We had a bit of a fling when he got home but he moved on. We still chat and funnily enough he's on here but not seen him since he moved on .
I've got mates away on tour now, miss them like crazy but text everyday. Kinda get used to the 5 am text lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was in the first gulf war bumblebea things have changed I'll admit but if you was on that front line in the first gulf war you just tried to come back alive |
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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago
secret town |
"I was in 42 unit Royal Marines for 15 years and when I was away especially in the gulf to be honest all you thought about was your next mission and staying alive
Which makes total sense.
Depends how far back and if they have to send washing forward I guess Hun. I met a chap once we met a few times before he got sent on tour. While he was away I sent him loads of mail and boxes to cheer him up even sent him a friends valentine card as knew the othe rlads would get stuff of there gfs. We got really close in those few months, we used to face time most days when he wasn't out on patrol. We had a bit of a fling when he got home but he moved on. We still chat and funnily enough he's on here but not seen him since he moved on .
I've got mates away on tour now, miss them like crazy but text everyday. Kinda get used to the 5 am text lol. "
Didn't think the military were allowed to use mobile phones while on tour?
Or do you mean they gone on exercise abroad then yes they allowed to use mobile phones. |
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"I was in 42 unit Royal Marines for 15 years and when I was away especially in the gulf to be honest all you thought about was your next mission and staying alive
Which makes total sense.
Depends how far back and if they have to send washing forward I guess Hun. I met a chap once we met a few times before he got sent on tour. While he was away I sent him loads of mail and boxes to cheer him up even sent him a friends valentine card as knew the othe rlads would get stuff of there gfs. We got really close in those few months, we used to face time most days when he wasn't out on patrol. We had a bit of a fling when he got home but he moved on. We still chat and funnily enough he's on here but not seen him since he moved on .
I've got mates away on tour now, miss them like crazy but text everyday. Kinda get used to the 5 am text lol.
Didn't think the military were allowed to use mobile phones while on tour?
Or do you mean they gone on exercise abroad then yes they allowed to use mobile phones. "
Can you do face time on a laptop/tablet? If so most operating bases out in Afghanistan have free Internet access provided by Paradigm on behalf of the MOD.
I agree the focus of the ops and its tempo would generally push out all things at home. But when you find down time I would always think of the woman (who was first my girlfriend, then my pregnant wife, then my wife and child) over my four tours of Afghanistan and other little escapades. But everyone is different emotionally and maybe the role can affect things too. |
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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago
secret town |
"I was in 42 unit Royal Marines for 15 years and when I was away especially in the gulf to be honest all you thought about was your next mission and staying alive
Which makes total sense.
Depends how far back and if they have to send washing forward I guess Hun. I met a chap once we met a few times before he got sent on tour. While he was away I sent him loads of mail and boxes to cheer him up even sent him a friends valentine card as knew the othe rlads would get stuff of there gfs. We got really close in those few months, we used to face time most days when he wasn't out on patrol. We had a bit of a fling when he got home but he moved on. We still chat and funnily enough he's on here but not seen him since he moved on .
I've got mates away on tour now, miss them like crazy but text everyday. Kinda get used to the 5 am text lol.
Didn't think the military were allowed to use mobile phones while on tour?
Or do you mean they gone on exercise abroad then yes they allowed to use mobile phones.
Can you do face time on a laptop/tablet? If so most operating bases out in Afghanistan have free Internet access provided by Paradigm on behalf of the MOD.
I agree the focus of the ops and its tempo would generally push out all things at home. But when you find down time I would always think of the woman (who was first my girlfriend, then my pregnant wife, then my wife and child) over my four tours of Afghanistan and other little escapades. But everyone is different emotionally and maybe the role can affect things too."
When I supported the troops on tour they did have Internet but could only send emails.
No Skype or face time etc they were on the front line, they couldn't have mobile phones
Another one of my friends is in America away on exercise he is allowed to use his phone and face time me. He is only away for two months |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I was in 42 unit Royal Marines for 15 years and when I was away especially in the gulf to be honest all you thought about was your next mission and staying alive
Which makes total sense.
Depends how far back and if they have to send washing forward I guess Hun. I met a chap once we met a few times before he got sent on tour. While he was away I sent him loads of mail and boxes to cheer him up even sent him a friends valentine card as knew the othe rlads would get stuff of there gfs. We got really close in those few months, we used to face time most days when he wasn't out on patrol. We had a bit of a fling when he got home but he moved on. We still chat and funnily enough he's on here but not seen him since he moved on .
I've got mates away on tour now, miss them like crazy but text everyday. Kinda get used to the 5 am text lol.
Didn't think the military were allowed to use mobile phones while on tour?
Or do you mean they gone on exercise abroad then yes they allowed to use mobile phones. "
Obviously I'm making it all up!!!
He was out in Basra and he had wifi and a iphone I spoke to him every day he was at base. The only time I didn't hear from him was in ops which was a week at the most.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I was in 42 unit Royal Marines for 15 years and when I was away especially in the gulf to be honest all you thought about was your next mission and staying alive
Which makes total sense.
Depends how far back and if they have to send washing forward I guess Hun. I met a chap once we met a few times before he got sent on tour. While he was away I sent him loads of mail and boxes to cheer him up even sent him a friends valentine card as knew the othe rlads would get stuff of there gfs. We got really close in those few months, we used to face time most days when he wasn't out on patrol. We had a bit of a fling when he got home but he moved on. We still chat and funnily enough he's on here but not seen him since he moved on .
I've got mates away on tour now, miss them like crazy but text everyday. Kinda get used to the 5 am text lol.
Didn't think the military were allowed to use mobile phones while on tour?
Or do you mean they gone on exercise abroad then yes they allowed to use mobile phones.
Can you do face time on a laptop/tablet? If so most operating bases out in Afghanistan have free Internet access provided by Paradigm on behalf of the MOD.
I agree the focus of the ops and its tempo would generally push out all things at home. But when you find down time I would always think of the woman (who was first my girlfriend, then my pregnant wife, then my wife and child) over my four tours of Afghanistan and other little escapades. But everyone is different emotionally and maybe the role can affect things too."
All my calls were really bizarre times from 10pm till the crack of dawn. Was really funny getting the fits of giggles and having to try be quiet as the other lads were gonking ha ha. |
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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago
secret town |
"I was in 42 unit Royal Marines for 15 years and when I was away especially in the gulf to be honest all you thought about was your next mission and staying alive
Which makes total sense.
Depends how far back and if they have to send washing forward I guess Hun. I met a chap once we met a few times before he got sent on tour. While he was away I sent him loads of mail and boxes to cheer him up even sent him a friends valentine card as knew the othe rlads would get stuff of there gfs. We got really close in those few months, we used to face time most days when he wasn't out on patrol. We had a bit of a fling when he got home but he moved on. We still chat and funnily enough he's on here but not seen him since he moved on .
I've got mates away on tour now, miss them like crazy but text everyday. Kinda get used to the 5 am text lol.
Didn't think the military were allowed to use mobile phones while on tour?
Or do you mean they gone on exercise abroad then yes they allowed to use mobile phones.
Obviously I'm making it all up!!!
He was out in Basra and he had wifi and a iphone I spoke to him every day he was at base. The only time I didn't hear from him was in ops which was a week at the most.
"
Where do I say your making it up? |
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Ive got friends in army and navy who text me all the time at all hours its nice to know they are safe ,but very lonely ......there are scammers out there and plenty on facebook saying they are in army and looking for friends and more ,you can tell by there spelling and grammar they are fake ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is a genuine question to see if what I'm thinking might be the case.
It's not prompted by anyone on this site but I thought here would be a good place to ask.
So my question is are military men out in dangerous places more likely to think they love a woman they chat with because they are in such an unpleasant place and need to feel as if there is someone there for them?
Or if they think they are in love very quickly is it just a good old red flag?"
can only speak for myself , we used to be constantly thinking where we could ge our hands on as much alcohol as possible and where we could ge a shag , love never came into the equation |
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"Well, I kept chatting a little and then got the message that something terrible had happened....
On a secret mission to West Africa the money his mother sent him has been stolen.
After this thread I was expecting something like this and sure enough he needs $500.
I've asked him how I can send it to him
Give it to me I'm being sent on the same mission
Ha ha, I'm currently trying to find a Western Union
Safer bet I'd say I may spend it on stuff
I'm going to tell him I've sent it "
Any further news |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Move about from place to place, sometimes hard to get into relationships, had some in past but never worked out as was never around apart from weekends unless deployed for weeks or months at a time |
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I've been messaging a guy for over a year, we'll never intend to meet as he's rarely in the UK. He suffers with a form of PTSD and has no links with family, never been married etc. He's in his 40s and has worn many uniforms not all British. He doesn't put a uniform on any longer but he's never safe, still protecting others in some hellish places. He'll die at some point never having loved or had a family. He regularly says he needs to stop it's getting harder but he can't. A "normal life" he'll never have, just a long list of one night stands and no one who cares about him. He feels like a monster and it's hard reading his messages sometimes but I'm there as his only contact to the outside world. He does say that it helps knowing I'm there but he just wants someone who doesn't judge him and to be there after a bad day, when he's able to message that is. So no they don't fall in love easily and some are incapable of loving at all, but invariably they look for comfort as it can be a very lonely life. Servicemen and women sacrifice a lot to keep us safe . Sorry OP a bit off track |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Question 1-is he with NATO Forces. Possible scammer
Question 2- is he a widower from the US with a young child. Possible scammer.
Question 3 - is he wanting ur email address after a couple messages. Possible scammer
Question 4 - is he saying he want to speak to u but only via a stat phone .
RUN FOR THE HILLS
If your thinking RED FLAG. Stick with ur gut.
Unless you wana play 'i no your game' and play along.
X
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