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What Driver...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Usually a middle aged man in a 320d who thinks it's the fastest car on the road 
Let's just spare a thought for the person who's job it is to instal indicators at the BMW factory...... |
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"Usually a middle aged man in a 320d who thinks it's the fastest car on the road
Let's just spare a thought for the person who's job it is to instal indicators at the BMW factory......"
I didn't think they put indicators on BMW's |
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"Usually a middle aged man in a 320d who thinks it's the fastest car on the road
Let's just spare a thought for the person who's job it is to instal indicators at the BMW factory......
I didn't think they put indicators on BMW's"
They don't, nor Mercs, Audis and Volvos  |
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Not driven for about 6 years now as I have no need to, but when I was a dispatch rider on ma bike, it was generally the boy racer types who had no regard for anyone else on the road 
I've only ever had 3 cars in ma life, but 26 bikes and a Transit van. Passed ma bike & car test first time within 10 days of each other in 1981  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's probably me doing the cutting up, tbh I've calmed down lately. My bug bear is drivers in middle lane on motorways. I've seen so many near misses cos of it."
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"Drivers of any car who wear hats behind the wheel.
There's one particular roundabout near here that I have never navigated without being cut up despite the lanes being clearly marked."
completely agree on the hat thing....it's like it sucks out their brain or something |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate dam cyclists. I mean why are they even allowed on the road when they cant match the acceleration or speed of a car. "
They beat them at rush hour.
That's why drivers really hate them. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Bikers. They hate me and keep trying to kill themselves under the wheels of my white van 
Bitch "
No not really.
I'm always tempted to open my door.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bikers. They hate me and keep trying to kill themselves under the wheels of my white van
Oi, I've had both and it's the driver, not the vehicle  "
I'm probably the slowest white van bird around. I actually do drive under 60 on dual carriageways and less than 50 on national speed limit roads. |
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"Bikers. They hate me and keep trying to kill themselves under the wheels of my white van
Bitch
No not really.
I'm always tempted to open my door.... "
Would that be when your wearing your cap stuck in traffic and we are filtering by..... suckers  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm going to apologise now for doing this frequently.
But I do often blow a kiss after "
Well I would chase you down make you pull over ....
To claim my kiss x  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Bikers. They hate me and keep trying to kill themselves under the wheels of my white van
Bitch
No not really.
I'm always tempted to open my door....
Would that be when your wearing your cap stuck in traffic and we are filtering by..... suckers "
It really pisses me off when I'm stuck in traffic and you twats just blow through.
**shakes fist at you** |
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"Bikers. They hate me and keep trying to kill themselves under the wheels of my white van
Bitch
No not really.
I'm always tempted to open my door....
Would that be when your wearing your cap stuck in traffic and we are filtering by..... suckers
It really pisses me off when I'm stuck in traffic and you twats just blow through.
**shakes fist at you** "
Fantastic isn't it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When I borrow my mates tractor ,,, Nobody
I'll see your tractor farmer boi, and raise you a.....
Tank - The Stranglers 
www.youtube.com/watch?v=k43z8_JjtR0"
Aww man I now want a tank |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bikers. They hate me and keep trying to kill themselves under the wheels of my white van
Bitch
Miss Bitch
Oops 
Good boy. Now hold still
Your going to need to soup up that van of yours 1st"
I could drop a V8 in it. Strap on a supercharger and nitrous and I'd still just pootle along |
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"Bikers. They hate me and keep trying to kill themselves under the wheels of my white van
Bitch
Miss Bitch
Oops
Good boy. Now hold still
Your going to need to soup up that van of yours 1st
I could drop a V8 in it. Strap on a supercharger and nitrous and I'd still just pootle along "
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"When I borrow my mates tractor ,,, Nobody
I'll see your tractor farmer boi, and raise you a.....
Tank - The Stranglers
www.youtube.com/watch?v=k43z8_JjtR0
Aww man I now want a tank "
You have to know how to make the turret erect though, and explode in a predestined place, or are you looking at a liberal scattering and blaming it on friendly fire |
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If I am ever cut up..
It is usually by some alien craft hovering overhead...
My electrics cut out and a strange beam lifts me to the spacecraft, followed by an anal probe...
Its a pain in the ass!
No! Really! Its an absolute pain in the ass! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If Mini counts as BMW, I tailgated the last one. He even brake checked me but I stuck on him for a good 10 minutes as he liked obviously liked it whisker close."
How big and clever of you  |
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"Usually a middle aged man in a 320d who thinks it's the fastest car on the road
Let's just spare a thought for the person who's job it is to instal indicators at the BMW factory......"
The most pointless job in the world. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find the worst drivers tend to be 4X4 / MPV who can't seem to judge the width of their vehicle, probably 'cos 1/2 the time they can't see over the steering wheel |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I find the worst drivers tend to be 4X4 / MPV who can't seem to judge the width of their vehicle, probably 'cos 1/2 the time they can't see over the steering wheel "
Do short men often buy these cars? |
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"I find the worst drivers tend to be 4X4 / MPV who can't seem to judge the width of their vehicle, probably 'cos 1/2 the time they can't see over the steering wheel "
Or the timid women in Micras thinking they are driving a tank and can't fit through a space that 3 normal cars could pass through |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If Mini counts as BMW, I tailgated the last one. He even brake checked me but I stuck on him for a good 10 minutes as he liked obviously liked it whisker close.
How big and clever of you "
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By *ficouldMan
over a year ago
a quandary, could you change my mind? |
Most cut up by, I believe that statement to mean on purpose, that would be 4x4 drivers.
However the people who make me brake most often to avoid a collision
Foreign Drivers
The Green cars (hybrid electric)
Followed by the Nissan micra type of cars. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I find the worst drivers tend to be 4X4 / MPV who can't seem to judge the width of their vehicle, probably 'cos 1/2 the time they can't see over the steering wheel
Or the timid women in Micras thinking they are driving a tank and can't fit through a space that 3 normal cars could pass through "
Yeah that's both hilarious & cringe making at the same time. They're also the ones that probably can't park either & hog the middle lane on the motorway.
and breathe... |
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"Audi's, usually someone who thinks his 2.0t is a "fast car" lol
That's burst my bubble "
Some, obviously not all ... 2.0t audi's have over 300ps, that's pretty fast by most standards. PS, I don't have an Audi, I work in the trade and most Audi types are looked down on. They seem to come into a dealer with an air of arrogance (again, obviously not all) Audi wankers |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Bmw audi an saxo drivers walkers oh an talking about drivers national speed on motorway 70 not 45 middle lane m20 saturday 14th January south bound 920ish |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Audi's, usually someone who thinks his 2.0t is a "fast car" lol
That's burst my bubble
Some, obviously not all ... 2.0t audi's have over 300ps, that's pretty fast by most standards. PS, I don't have an Audi, I work in the trade and most Audi types are looked down on. They seem to come into a dealer with an air of arrogance (again, obviously not all) Audi wankers "
Uncanny Iam a bit of a wanker.
Think it's time for that new jag. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I find the worst drivers tend to be 4X4 / MPV who can't seem to judge the width of their vehicle, probably 'cos 1/2 the time they can't see over the steering wheel
Or the timid women in Micras thinking they are driving a tank and can't fit through a space that 3 normal cars could pass through
Yeah that's both hilarious & cringe making at the same time. They're also the ones that probably can't park either & hog the middle lane on the motorway.
and breathe... "
My first car was a brand new Micra; which I drove to Southend the day after I passed my driving test (first time, two minor ticks). I thought I was James Hunt; I was probably more Jeremy Hunt. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not forgetting the humble pedestrian. I always stop n look both ways (I have to stop when looking backwards or u fall over) not the amount of plonkers who don't indicate yet swear at me for stepping into the road.
Don't forget folks pedestrians need to know your intentions too. Xxx |
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"Not forgetting the humble pedestrian. I always stop n look both ways (I have to stop when looking backwards or u fall over) not the amount of plonkers who don't indicate yet swear at me for stepping into the road.
Don't forget folks pedestrians need to know your intentions too. Xxx"
Ah yes, the peeps that indicate to go right when they leave their junction, then suddenly turn left without managing to show any obvious change of direction |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men.
Are you Sabine Schmitdz in disguise 
I could Google her and pretend I know who she is.
But I wont...who?
She's a woman. The one that can drive. "
The only one? |
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By *ty31Man
over a year ago
NW London |
"Usually a middle aged man in a 320d who thinks it's the fastest car on the road
Let's just spare a thought for the person who's job it is to instal indicators at the BMW factory......"
#sorry. Not sorry |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men.
Are you Sabine Schmitdz in disguise
I could Google her and pretend I know who she is.
But I wont...who?
She's a woman. The one that can drive.
The only one?"
Fraid so. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men.
Are you Sabine Schmitdz in disguise
I could Google her and pretend I know who she is.
But I wont...who?
She's a woman. The one that can drive.
The only one?
Fraid so."
I'm not her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's either van drivers or taxis where I live."
The audi and Merc drivers etc don't bother me. I always look at their car and think naaah!! They love their car too much to risk hitting mine and I carry on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Try driving in London! All these new bike lanes for the cyclists but they still decide to use the FUCKING road!
Your lane is empty mate. Why on earth are you in front of me at the traffic lights when you can be on your cycle lane pedalling along already?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I drive a 4x4 Audi, and I can see beyond the steering wheel so zip it!! I'm only 5'4 as well. Think it helps that I have my chair raised all the way to the top.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm an HGV driver, you're all a bunch of cunts to me.. Doing 40mph in 50mph roadworks but you hog the inside lanes so I can't overtake as I'm not allowed on outside lane.
I'm constantly cut up by cars entering motorway, but can't decide to slow down or speed up.
And don't get me started on the fools who try and sneak behind me... As I'm reversing my 22ton truck.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...are you most frequently cut up by?...
Me: BMW drivers.
C___ts.
Taxi drivers, all the time. For ever pulling out on me !"
The taxi drivers round here are lovely. We have two so we know their names and where they live. No driving like c__ts and getting away with it here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...are you most frequently cut up by?...
Me: BMW drivers.
C___ts.
Taxi drivers, all the time. For ever pulling out on me !
The taxi drivers round here are lovely. We have two so we know their names and where they live. No driving like c__ts and getting away with it here "
Ditto here too. We would be totally stuck without our taxis, the lads are all great and always drive safely. |
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By *eavenNhellCouple
over a year ago
carrbrook stalybridge |
as a hgv driver wold say usualy anything large black and german and for the purposes of this statement lexus are german
and to balance most of the appaling hgv driving seems to be tippers loons the lot of them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nissan Qashqai/Juke drivers are a particularly awful bunch of fukwits. I'd have them all slaughtered at birth Herod style.
Most Beemer drivers should be shot the second they purchase the car let alone when they sit behind the wheel and turn the ignition on.
All Audi drivers are c__ts. Full stop.
Mercedes are usually driven by the old, senile and infirm. Apart from the A class series which are really good, especially the AMG line models.
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"Just to confirm the BMW I drove home last night has been serviced and motd and is back with its owner. Can I now take the shameful look off my face
and the mask so no one knew who it was?
"
You saying I'm a minger |
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By *ewrocksWoman
over a year ago
button moon |
"Just to confirm the BMW I drove home last night has been serviced and motd and is back with its owner. Can I now take the shameful look off my face
and the mask so no one knew who it was?
You saying I'm a minger "
I'm suggesting you wore a disguise so you weren't recognised driving a beemer! |
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