FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Rude people

Rude people

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Why are there so many rude people on here? When you go to the trouble of taking time to message people after you have read the profiles and constructed a message that fits with what they're looking for... they just delete it. Not even a no thank you your not type etc etc?

Any thoughts anyone?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Thank you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Wow you can tell it's Thursday

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

It must be frustrating and tiresome to have messages ignored but it's going to happen. All I can suggest is that you expect it and try and accept it will happen, it'll make your time here less stressful.

Good luck

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By *rincess peachWoman over a year ago

shits creek

Personally I wouldn't reply because I don't like your profile pic. It may seem rude or shallow, but unfortunately that's the way it is, and I think a lot of people are the same.

It's not actually considered rude on here, it's just a way of saying no thanks, without getting into backwards and forwards messages of how many times you can say no thanks.

There are plenty of genuinely rude people in the outside world. Those who can't be bothered to say please or thank you when you're right in front of them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Read the FAQ's ~ no reply means a no thank you.

It must get frustrating but it is what it is.

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple over a year ago

Halifax

Its not rude not to reply op,just take it as a no thanks.

Even with what you think is a well written message,it doesnt mean you you are their type etc,

Some women are innundated with mail and replying to all,would take too long.

Miss

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I get fed up of people who think they "deserve" a reply. You don't. Read the faq's and the millions of other threads like this.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hi OP, just a Handy High Heels Hint; many women will click on a profile and check the photo and/or profile text before deciding whether or not to respond. Furthermore, lots if not most have experienced offensive, abusive and obnoxious responses to a polite no thank you. This is why, as per site advice, a delete can be taken as a no thank you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Here's a 'Fuck' from the couldn't give a fuck field. Such a shame for you, bless.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why are there so many rude people on here? When you go to the trouble of taking time to message people after you have read the profiles and constructed a message that fits with what they're looking for... they just delete it. Not even a no thank you your not type etc etc?

Any thoughts anyone? "

You aren't owed a reply. And inbox full of rejection would be no better.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/01/17 12:09:55]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Personally, I don't because I can't be arsed. But I've got filters on so not many get through anyway.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Maybe they looked at your profile first decided not for them and deleted without opening.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There's that many guys on here and women can only chat to a certain number at a time. It's luck and a numbers game. Keep trying

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There's currently 196 messages in my inbox... why should I have to send 196 replies saying no thank you?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why are there so many people on here who don't bother researching the threads and FAQ's? When you go to the trouble of taking time to write FAQ's and a million threads on the subject, after you have read the threads and FAQ's and still constructed a message that fits with what they're looking for... they just delete it. People still raise threads on it. Not even a thought to previous threads and FAQ's.

Any thoughts anyone? "

I adjusted your original thread OP, hope that helps

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Or just suck it up maybe your not to everyone's taste. Your not the first and certainly not the last seriously get over yourself.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I replied with a no this morning I got back "but why"

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By *sGivesWoodWoman over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Any thoughts anyone? "

OP.... I have copied and pasted directly from the FAQ section which will also help with any other questions you may have... Mrs

There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!

It's not rude not to reply.

Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?

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By *ilary and DonaldCouple over a year ago

chingford

We scan our inbox for the profile pics.

Any we don't like we delete without reading.

It's another filter for us.

Shallow ? Perhaps but it makes our time on here less arduous and means we can concentrate on the things we enjoy.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"I replied with a no this morning I got back "but why"

And then it begins...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any thoughts anyone? "

Pointless opening into dialogue with someone who you feel isn't your type physically or you feel you wouldnt have much in common with.

I personally think its a waste of both parties time.

Also by replying or not replying if that person isnt for you can still leave you open to abusive messages as some people just are not good at handling rejection.

You are damned if you reply with a polite thanks but no thanks and damned if you don't.

So its often better to just ignore and concentrate on the messages from those people who do interest you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

No one here is owed a reply, simple really. I'm sure it is frustrating but thats just how things are.

Miss T

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I had reply after 4 Weeks yesterday. No thanks.

I think I gathered that love

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because it's the start of a pointless conversation

easier to delete once I've looked at the profile and seen that they don't interest me

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By *ucyfur77Woman over a year ago

Pleasuretown

"Or just suck it up maybe your not to everyone's taste. Your not the first and certainly not the last seriously get over yourself.

OP, I suggest you look at the FAQs as other posters have indicated

Good luck

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By *inaryGuyMan over a year ago

Near the River

Unfortunately guys outnumber gals by a zillion to one and likely to get overwhelmed with offers, luck plays a part

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By *sGivesWoodWoman over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Any thoughts anyone?

Pointless opening into dialogue with someone who you feel isn't your type physically or you feel you wouldnt have much in common with.

I personally think its a waste of both parties time.

Also by replying or not replying if that person isnt for you can still leave you open to abusive messages as some people just are not good at handling rejection.

You are damned if you reply with a polite thanks but no thanks and damned if you don't.

So its often better to just ignore and concentrate on the messages from those people who do interest you.

And this is why I got rid of my single profile damned if you do damned if you don't lol

Mrs

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By *a Fee VerteWoman over a year ago

Limbo

I used to try and reply to what appeared to be considered messages but sometimes it can be overwhelming and I'm not going to put Fab above real life ...

... in any case, I've had abuse for rejecting people who *claimed* to have read my profile, when the contents of their message clearly proved they hadn't, and/or was a generic cut and paste mail that could have been sent to anyone. Starting a message 'great profile' doesn't mean the sender has read it and doesn't entitle them to a reply.

Other times, people may well have read my profile and made an 'effort' to compose a message but actually, their own profile is offensive in some way and/or I've seen offensive stuff from them on the forums. Why would I waste my time responding to someone like that?

Messages can be deleted for all sorts of reasons - it's a risk we all take when we send one. Disappointing maybe, frustrating maybe but it is what it is. All any of us can do is make our profile and pics as appealing as possible so we stand a better chance of being noticed .... and move on, or get out if we don't like it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It must be frustrating and tiresome to have messages ignored but it's going to happen. All I can suggest is that you expect it and try and accept it will happen, it'll make your time here less stressful.

Good luck "

This! I can imagine it's really difficult for single guys on here...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think some on here have been let down so much in the past by liars chancers and dreamers!! They are extremely cautious with some!! ALso if you get a 100 messages a day it's hard to reply to every message. I don't blame people for being rude at times. This site has become far to big for it's boots. It was great site at the beginning but now it's over run with fake profiles and time wasters. The real genuine people have to be extremely selective in who they meet.

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By *oxy_minxWoman over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

Every bloody day this thread is posted, why god why!!!

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By *inaryGuyMan over a year ago

Near the River

"I think some on here have been let down so much in the past by liars chancers and dreamers!! They are extremely cautious with some!! ALso if you get a 100 messages a day it's hard to reply to every message. I don't blame people for being rude at times. This site has become far to big for it's boots. It was great site at the beginning but now it's over run with fake profiles and time wasters. The real genuine people have to be extremely selective in who they meet."

Maybe time to restrict usage eg for non-site supporters...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any thoughts anyone? "

you seriously need to read the FAQ's

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By *heRealMccoyMan over a year ago

london

It happens !

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By *osieWoman over a year ago

Wembley

"Thank you for your interest but since you do not meet all my requirements, I will be polite and ask you to f**k orf and next time, RTFP"

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By *inkySlinkyCouple over a year ago

Leeds

Any thoughts anyone? "

I think people delete your message because you haven't taken the time or trouble to put some decent pics on your profile.

Sally

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By *heRealMccoyMan over a year ago

london

""Thank you for your interest but since you do not meet all my requirements, I will be polite and ask you to f**k orf and next time, RTFP""

Hahah

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By *osieWoman over a year ago

Wembley

"Unfortunately guys outnumber gals by a zillion to one and likely to get overwhelmed with offers, luck plays a part "

No, they don't (zillion to one); just that most loosers like to think so to give them an excuse

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Maybe some guys in here would appreciate a "Cull"

Where the numbers of male members are reduced so hopefully enhancing their chances of getting a shag ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Unfortunately guys outnumber gals by a zillion to one and likely to get overwhelmed with offers, luck plays a part

No, they don't (zillion to one); just that most loosers like to think so to give them an excuse"

Guys certainly do out number the women on here. Fact. And no I'm not a loser btw

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe some guys in here would appreciate a "Cull"

Where the numbers of male members are reduced so hopefully enhancing their chances of getting a shag ?

Might be able to get a message read then instead of being bulk deleted because of the stampede

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Every bloody day this thread is posted, why god why!!!

Because some honestly don't understand it's this guys first post, I think he'll get it after this.

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By *eeBee67Man over a year ago

Masked and Distant

I have resigned myself to not getting any replies. Except from people I already know.

Mind you I dont send any messages either..... does that make me rude for not asking "Gizza shag"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Take everything with a big pinch of salt. Grow some thick skin. Move on.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Take everything with a big pinch of salt. Grow some thick skin. Move on. "

I'd apply that advice to life in general too

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By *mmmMaybeCouple over a year ago

West Wales

""Thank you for your interest but since you do not meet all my requirements, I will be polite and ask you to f**k orf and next time, RTFP""

And then you get

"I read the profile but as i'm young & fit with a bigger cock I thought you might change your mind?"..

Seriously? To us? F**k off you imbecile, Block

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any thoughts anyone? "

Your post mirrors the FAQ. Maybe a good idea to read these first.

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By *osieWoman over a year ago

Wembley

"Unfortunately guys outnumber gals by a zillion to one and likely to get overwhelmed with offers, luck plays a part

No, they don't (zillion to one); just that most loosers like to think so to give them an excuse

Guys certainly do out number the women on here. Fact. And no I'm not a loser btw "

But not by any great number

Fact is that those who cannot get a woman interested in them on this site (where women are actively looking for sex with men) don’t stand a snowball’s chance in hell getting a woman interested in them in the big-wide world

Fact is that here I am only looking at mainly his physical characteristics

In the world outside, I will be judging him on his intelligence, personality, education, career, family background, social standing, financial standing and a whole host of other attributes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/01/17 14:12:34]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

you're just here for NSA sex. why should we reply?

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

Why do people with little or no pics and barely any profile text expect others with well constructed profiles to get excited about theirs.

It's a mystery to me

Next !!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

if you click the try new look mail box you can pretty much read a sent message, so i guess if there not interested they dont reply, no big deal.

if they actually reply with a rude message youd have something to worry about ..

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By *loria JamesTV/TS over a year ago

Durham

Personally I normally try to answer all msgs except the " can I Cum on your stockings" variety.

It's amazing how you can go from being "absolutely gorgeous" to " just a bloke in a frock" after one simple no thanks.

I don't really think there is a right answer to this it's down to personal choice.

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman over a year ago
Forum Mod

My Own Little World

I shall assume OP, that in the year+ that you have been on here that you never bothered to read the site FAQs.

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By *innamon!Woman over a year ago

no matter

Any thoughts anyone? "

It is not rude not to reply to messages.

If someone messages me that I dont already interact with I would not reply as clearly they have not read the profile. Doesnt matter how well thought out you think messages are. Not interested means just that.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

No reply means no intrest

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A no reply is par for course

Single chaps an inexhaustible source

Don't take it personal or to heart

Just go back to the start

Be polite and move on with life

There is no place for trouble and strife

It's a fact of life that there is no doubt

No place to scream and shout

Just be cool and keep calm

As we singletons have considerable charm

It's happened to me that dreaded block

Even though I have an incredible cock!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

No thank you. Feel better now?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/01/17 15:34:49]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any thoughts anyone? "

Where do flies go at night?

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By *uzy444Woman over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

Any thoughts anyone? "

why are there so many people who dont read the FAQ, why do so many complain, whinge, argue, complain, waste time, get meets, dont get meets. like cock, like pussy, dont like anyone anything..something, anything..

cos its life and you are dealing with humans..simple..next question...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I replied with a no this morning I got back "but why"

And if you say too far, they dispute it or say they will come to you. XXX

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any thoughts anyone?

Where do flies go at night? "

Into your food if you leave it out at night uncovered! Lol xxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

thats life on this site people do not care who they hurt or insult online just go with the flow..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Op it's matter of choice if your not what people are looking for why would they engage in a conversation that's going nowhere thus giving you false hope so easier to delete and hope you get the message it's nothing personal I personally would say sorry not my type and if you kept persisting block you

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By *rightonsteveMan over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Any thoughts anyone? "

I had this yesterday and I said "steve, (ya sexy beast) this is why you don't send messages. Live and learn, matey" and then about 10 minutes later is forgotten who they were.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hi OP, just a Handy High Heels Hint; many women will click on a profile and check the photo and/or profile text before deciding whether or not to respond. Furthermore, lots if not most have experienced offensive, abusive and obnoxious responses to a polite no thank you. This is why, as per site advice, a delete can be taken as a no thank you. "

Oh yes....THIS! OP, if you think deleting your message without replying is rude, try being a female who declines some guys advances on here. You'll soon learn what rude is. Wish I had a pound for every abusive/rude/whiney/pleading message I have received after sending a polite, well-thought out refusal of taking things further.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Personally, I don't because I can't be arsed. But I've got filters on so not many get through anyway."

I've seen your filters and I'm determined that I'll find a way through one day.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any thoughts anyone? "

I think it's rude of you to expect people to reply, when they're obviously not interested.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

OP, no profile pic. Only one public pic (cock pic) so you have to expect deletes on that basis alone.

No reply just means "no thank you"

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By *iss_tressWoman over a year ago

London

"Every bloody day this thread is posted, why god why!!!

exactly what I thought, yet I've read down to this!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Personally I wouldn't reply because I don't like your profile pic. It may seem rude or shallow, but unfortunately that's the way it is, and I think a lot of people are the same.

It's not actually considered rude on here, it's just a way of saying no thanks, without getting into backwards and forwards messages of how many times you can say no thanks.

There are plenty of genuinely rude people in the outside world. Those who can't be bothered to say please or thank you when you're right in front of them. "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

OP has to reply to everyone in this topic now. it'd be rude of him not to.

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By *eliWoman over a year ago

"OP has to reply to everyone in this topic now. it'd be rude of him not to.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any thoughts anyone? "

I don't know if you can define that as rude. What possibly is rude is posing a question on a forum and having people taking the time to reply to your question and then not thanking them for their trouble...... or even replying...

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By *osieWoman over a year ago

Wembley

"OP has to reply to everyone in this topic now. it'd be rude of him not to.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any thoughts anyone?

Well said

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any thoughts anyone? "

You need to familiarise yourself with the site FAQ's OP. It will make your whole experience of FAB that much more enjoyable

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By *rightonsteveMan over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"OP has to reply to everyone in this topic now. it'd be rude of him not to.

Haha all these threads and then this. I want a reply as well!

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By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Sometimes I would love to give constructive advice to men who message me - didn't read my profile, pics are off-putting/scary, profile is rubbish, message is borderline illegal etc etc, but the moment I do so that man can get through any filters I've put up. Not worth it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We replied today and got hassle. From a single guy that wanted to meet the wife.

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By *ire_thornMan over a year ago

no comment

I get tired of motherfuckers getting butt hurt about a no thanks... I heave heard of it and it makes no damn sense, I have gotten a few no thank you's

My response has always been

Okay thank you for your time have a good day

No need to get nasty. It will not make them say Oh my God you just treated me like shit, take me now

You're not owed a response.

That being said

Have a nice day

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

if I reply no thanks 50% of the time I get grief back so why should I reply ?

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By *ire_thornMan over a year ago

no comment

"if I reply no thanks 50% of the time I get grief back so why should I reply ?"

And there is really no need for it

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By *elma and ShaggyCouple over a year ago

Bedworth

Op when you get junk mail and take away leaflets through the post do you sit down and write a reply to the senders saying thanks but no thanks?

The mail coming into our inbox is no different to junk mail, it is unsolicited and as such we often just throw it in the bin

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any thoughts anyone? "

I think it is worse when someone originates a message with you, a few fly back and forth and then they simply don't reply to your last message to them.

That really boils my piss!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Personally I wouldn't reply because I don't like your profile pic. It may seem rude or shallow, but unfortunately that's the way it is, and I think a lot of people are the same.

It's not actually considered rude on here, it's just a way of saying no thanks, without getting into backwards and forwards messages of how many times you can say no thanks.

There are plenty of genuinely rude people in the outside world. Those who can't be bothered to say please or thank you when you're right in front of them. "

Not replying is probably not rude but some women reply back with something harsh, I understand there are many single guys on fab and the women are probably tired of being prestered by them all but absolutely no need to treat others in that way. After all it is a swingers site and most people join here 'initially' for one thing, to try their luck.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes I would love to give constructive advice to men who message me - didn't read my profile, pics are off-putting/scary, profile is rubbish, message is borderline illegal etc etc, but the moment I do so that man can get through any filters I've put up. Not worth it."

To be fair I wouldn't mind constructive criticism,

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can't agree enough with your sentiments

I think it is rude

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any thoughts anyone?

And this is exactly what I mean, condescending attitudes,

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By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

To be fair I wouldn't mind constructive criticism, "

That wasn't my point.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

To be fair I wouldn't mind constructive criticism,

That wasn't my point."

Ok, but maybe constructive criticism is good, people can understand where they are going wrong

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By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

To be fair I wouldn't mind constructive criticism,

That wasn't my point.

Ok, but maybe constructive criticism is good, people can understand where they are going wrong "

Indeed, and I'm happy to give it on the forum. But the moment I reply to a bloke via message, even to say no, or tell him his face pic makes him look like a murderer, he can circumvent all future filters.

That is one of the many reasons why women don't reply to people they don't want to meet.

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