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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Two cannibals are eating a clown,
"'Ere," says on t'other, "Does this taste funny to you?""
Is this the level we are at already? Excellent
Two old ladies are sitting at a bus stop when a man walked passed and flashed at them.
One had a stroke, the other couldn't reach |
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"I'm buying the wife an artificial leg this year. It's not her main present, just a stocking filler."
Oh, you're good at these!
Spent the last three days alone trying to learn escapology. I need to get out more. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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2 blondes in a travel agents, 1st blonde says to the 2nd 'Wheres furthest, the moon or Florida?' the 2nd blonde replied 'Hello...can u see Florida from here? |
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"I used to play the triangle in a Jamaican Reggae Orchestra, it was good fun, I just had to stand at the back and ting. "
LOOOOOOL
Sex education at my school was a muttered warning about the janitor. |
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"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur...?
A Lickolotofpuss
What do you call a gay dinosaur?
A megasorearse"
What do you call a dinosaur who has only one boss eye, a severe nervous blink and a squint?
Doyouthinkesaurus |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Three blondes were celebrating, chanting 6 months 6 months yay, when asked what they were so happy about, they said they'ed just finished a jig-saw puzzle that said 2-3 years"
Lol
That one tickled me a bit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whats brown and sticky
A stick"
What's green and smells like yellow paint?
Green paint.
__________________________________
What's pink and fluffy?
Pink fluff. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What do you call a man with a plank of wood on his head?
Edward.
What do you call a man with two planks of wood on his head.
Edward woodward
What do you call a man with 3 planks of wood on his head?
I don't know either but Edward woodward would |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A man goes to the dentist. As the dentist approaches with the drill the man puts his hand between the dentists trouser legs and cups his balls saying "we're not going to hurt each other, are we?!" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A man goes to the doctors for some test results. The doctor says "I have some really bad news. You have cancer and alzheimers". The man says "Thank goodness for that I thought I had cancer!" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was sweeping the floor when Jenson Button walked by. I took the handle off the broom and shoved it down his trouser leg and said "how's that for pole position!" |
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