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date no pay
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"id never go on a date unless i knew i had the funds to cover it. i would never in my life presume he was paying "
 me too! Wouldn't want to be left with the whole bill though if it was somewhere expensive I hadn't picked! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"id never go on a date unless i knew i had the funds to cover it. i would never in my life presume he was paying
me too! Wouldn't want to be left with the whole bill though if it was somewhere expensive I hadn't picked!"
agree'd id not be happy if he presumed i was footing the entire bill especially id he asked me out and chose the venue.. i doubt it would lead to date 2.
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
It's a funny story, but can you imagine how ashamed you would feel if you got left in a restaurant? The embarrassment would be much worse than having to sit there, wondering where he had gone before finally asking and paying for the bill and leaving alone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a gentleman I would never expect the lady to pay, whatever the night was to bring. I find chivalry is dead on many. Such a pain being nice lol 
You are a breath of fresh air xx"
Thank-you, it's the way I have always done things. Shame ladies like bad men mostly lol x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a gentleman I would never expect the lady to pay, whatever the night was to bring. I find chivalry is dead on many. Such a pain being nice lol
You are a breath of fresh air xx
Thank-you, it's the way I have always done things. Shame ladies like bad men mostly lol x"
Just to be clear - are you talking about a first date or ALL dates? So if you start regularly dating someone you will continue to always pay for everything, whatever the situation?
If so I wouldn't necessarily call that chivalry. I'd call that exploitation.
If you mean just the first few dates then I agree with you and I also like to pay for the initial date. But if and when we start going steady there's a limit to how far my generosity can extend! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"id never go on a date unless i knew i had the funds to cover it. i would never in my life presume he was paying "
Ditto. In fact I've paid more than half a few times. |
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As a gentleman, if I were to go on a date I'd of course choose the restaurant, the wine and the best food available I can get a groupon for. There is absolutely no way I'd expect a woman to drive herself to the place, if I'm going by bus so can she.
The advantage of a groupon in this situation (and I'm sure you ladies can see the romance in this), is that actually when the bill comes, even if she refuses to pay the whole thing, you've both saved money. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a gentleman I would never expect the lady to pay, whatever the night was to bring. I find chivalry is dead on many. Such a pain being nice lol
You are a breath of fresh air xx
Thank-you, it's the way I have always done things. Shame ladies like bad men mostly lol x
Just to be clear - are you talking about a first date or ALL dates? So if you start regularly dating someone you will continue to always pay for everything, whatever the situation?
If so I wouldn't necessarily call that chivalry. I'd call that exploitation.
If you mean just the first few dates then I agree with you and I also like to pay for the initial date. But if and when we start going steady there's a limit to how far my generosity can extend!"
It's not exploitation, it's my choice to pay. Meals, drinks whatever. It's how I was brought up |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"As a gentleman, if I were to go on a date I'd of course choose the restaurant, the wine and the best food available I can get a groupon for. There is absolutely no way I'd expect a woman to drive herself to the place, if I'm going by bus so can she.
The advantage of a groupon in this situation (and I'm sure you ladies can see the romance in this), is that actually when the bill comes, even if she refuses to pay the whole thing, you've both saved money."
Also if you order a third meal, but get it to take away, you can have it tomorrow, but you still split the bill 50-50 and you'll be quids in |
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By *iver2015Woman
over a year ago
middlesbrough |
"As a gentleman, if I were to go on a date I'd of course choose the restaurant, the wine and the best food available I can get a groupon for. There is absolutely no way I'd expect a woman to drive herself to the place, if I'm going by bus so can she.
The advantage of a groupon in this situation (and I'm sure you ladies can see the romance in this), is that actually when the bill comes, even if she refuses to pay the whole thing, you've both saved money."
Everyone loves a groupon and if the date was shite at least it wasn't expensive.
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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago
secret town |
"A woman in the usa got asked out for a date in a very expensive restaurant when the bill arrived she realised he had left her to pay ever happened to you?
No
Don't do dates "
But if a man did take me out I would expect him to pay |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a gentleman I would never expect the lady to pay, whatever the night was to bring. I find chivalry is dead on many. Such a pain being nice lol
You are a breath of fresh air xx
Thank-you, it's the way I have always done things. Shame ladies like bad men mostly lol x
Just to be clear - are you talking about a first date or ALL dates? So if you start regularly dating someone you will continue to always pay for everything, whatever the situation?
If so I wouldn't necessarily call that chivalry. I'd call that exploitation.
If you mean just the first few dates then I agree with you and I also like to pay for the initial date. But if and when we start going steady there's a limit to how far my generosity can extend!
It's not exploitation, it's my choice to pay. Meals, drinks whatever. It's how I was brought up "
Good for you and if it makes you happy so be it. You said in your original post that chivalry is dead on many. I respectfully disagree with you that not paying for every date and not absorbing 100% of all costs over time with a regular date is un-chivalrous. On this I think we will need to agree to disagree.
I believe chivalry is alive and well and not demonstrated by the depth of a wallet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Surely we should be doing the 50 50 thing . All being equal ?
I'm sure when women finally get equal pay we might do. Might be some years yet though  "
Lots of women earn as much as men, where I work 4 out of 5 of my colleagues wives earn more than they do. It's not like we earn minimum wage either, they will be comfortably above the national average |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a gentleman, if I were to go on a date I'd of course choose the restaurant, the wine and the best food available I can get a groupon for. There is absolutely no way I'd expect a woman to drive herself to the place, if I'm going by bus so can she.
The advantage of a groupon in this situation (and I'm sure you ladies can see the romance in this), is that actually when the bill comes, even if she refuses to pay the whole thing, you've both saved money.
Everyone loves a groupon and if the date was shite at least it wasn't expensive.
"
What's a Groupon ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A woman in the usa got asked out for a date in a very expensive restaurant when the bill arrived she realised he had left her to pay ever happened to you?
No
Don't do dates
But if a man did take me out I would expect him to pay "
 |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"As a gentleman, if I were to go on a date I'd of course choose the restaurant, the wine and the best food available I can get a groupon for. There is absolutely no way I'd expect a woman to drive herself to the place, if I'm going by bus so can she.
The advantage of a groupon in this situation (and I'm sure you ladies can see the romance in this), is that actually when the bill comes, even if she refuses to pay the whole thing, you've both saved money.
Everyone loves a groupon and if the date was shite at least it wasn't expensive.
"
I used to have a Taste card. If we went somewhere on the Taste list then me 'paying' my 'share' was always a funny negotiation. One friend would always refuse me contributing cash to the bill and he always called the card the (insert real name) discount.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a gentleman I would never expect the lady to pay, whatever the night was to bring. I find chivalry is dead on many. Such a pain being nice lol
You are a breath of fresh air xx
Thank-you, it's the way I have always done things. Shame ladies like bad men mostly lol x
Just to be clear - are you talking about a first date or ALL dates? So if you start regularly dating someone you will continue to always pay for everything, whatever the situation?
If so I wouldn't necessarily call that chivalry. I'd call that exploitation.
If you mean just the first few dates then I agree with you and I also like to pay for the initial date. But if and when we start going steady there's a limit to how far my generosity can extend!
It's not exploitation, it's my choice to pay. Meals, drinks whatever. It's how I was brought up
Good for you and if it makes you happy so be it. You said in your original post that chivalry is dead on many. I respectfully disagree with you that not paying for every date and not absorbing 100% of all costs over time with a regular date is un-chivalrous. On this I think we will need to agree to disagree.
I believe chivalry is alive and well and not demonstrated by the depth of a wallet."
It's not about my wallet or ability to pay, I think it's more about doing the right thing
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
It's not about my wallet or ability to pay, I think it's more about doing the right thing
"
So do you think that any guy who doesn't pay all of the costs all of the time is un-chivalrous? I'm not trying to he deliberately argumentative, just intrigued by your opening statement that "chivalry is dead on many".
Does chivalry mean paying for everything in perpetuity? What if the lady feels uncomfortable with this and wants to pay her own way for once? Would you feel less of a man?
As I say not being deliberately cantankerous just curious as to the reasoning behind you thinking its 'doing the right thing' to always pay for everything. Some ladies might find that patronising wouldn't they? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are those women who don't want to pay and never offer, that says a lot about them.
There are those women who insist on paying their way and refuse any compromise on that principal, that also says a bit about them.
There are those women who genuinely want to pay their way, sincerely offer to do so but then concede in a conscious attempt to allow you to massage your male ego whilst taking it as a compliment. |
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"
It's not about my wallet or ability to pay, I think it's more about doing the right thing
So do you think that any guy who doesn't pay all of the costs all of the time is un-chivalrous? I'm not trying to he deliberately argumentative, just intrigued by your opening statement that "chivalry is dead on many".
Does chivalry mean paying for everything in perpetuity? What if the lady feels uncomfortable with this and wants to pay her own way for once? Would you feel less of a man?
As I say not being deliberately cantankerous just curious as to the reasoning behind you thinking its 'doing the right thing' to always pay for everything. Some ladies might find that patronising wouldn't they? "
This ain't what they threw themselves in front of the king's horse for.. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"
It's not about my wallet or ability to pay, I think it's more about doing the right thing
So do you think that any guy who doesn't pay all of the costs all of the time is un-chivalrous? I'm not trying to he deliberately argumentative, just intrigued by your opening statement that "chivalry is dead on many".
Does chivalry mean paying for everything in perpetuity? What if the lady feels uncomfortable with this and wants to pay her own way for once? Would you feel less of a man?
As I say not being deliberately cantankerous just curious as to the reasoning behind you thinking its 'doing the right thing' to always pay for everything. Some ladies might find that patronising wouldn't they? "
I would. I also find it annoying being the one to pay for everything. Balance in all things. Accepting a gift should be gracious.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A woman in the usa got asked out for a date in a very expensive restaurant when the bill arrived she realised he had left her to pay ever happened to you?"
No. nobody asks me on a date  |
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I always remember my 'long gone' parents bless them, before they were married my dad took a 6 mile walk to walk my mam's home, then a six mile walk back to his home.....Its lovely to know your parents really loved each other..
.
.
.
.
He must be turning in his grave, seeing me, meet for dates in a restaurant, climbing out of toilet window and leaving the lady to pay, before texting 'Are we still on for a shag!'
This is a jocular message!
Honest!
Or is it?
Da da da! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
It's not about my wallet or ability to pay, I think it's more about doing the right thing
So do you think that any guy who doesn't pay all of the costs all of the time is un-chivalrous? I'm not trying to he deliberately argumentative, just intrigued by your opening statement that "chivalry is dead on many".
Does chivalry mean paying for everything in perpetuity? What if the lady feels uncomfortable with this and wants to pay her own way for once? Would you feel less of a man?
As I say not being deliberately cantankerous just curious as to the reasoning behind you thinking its 'doing the right thing' to always pay for everything. Some ladies might find that patronising wouldn't they? "
Your right and I have always got round that situation when the other person has felt uncomfortable by it. I was brought up a certain way and that was to always look after the lady you are out with. It is something that is definitely a lost art these days |
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I've cut it to a quick end before now normally because they've lied about something or other but couldn't ever do that to someone although I possibly should of the further information cast my mind back....
I'd never let a lady pay or even half. I expect the offer to go half's and appreciate the it but I will have asked them out so I will pay |
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"A woman in the usa got asked out for a date in a very expensive restaurant when the bill arrived she realised he had left her to pay ever happened to you?
No. nobody asks me on a date "
Fancy a date |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I saw a lady customer come out of a posh restaurant and walk past the bar u was doing the door at looking unhappy..
Turned out she was on a date ,the dickhead started rowing after getting arseholes and decided to fuck off...thus leaving her with the bill
Ahhhh the joys of dating |
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"
It's not about my wallet or ability to pay, I think it's more about doing the right thing
So do you think that any guy who doesn't pay all of the costs all of the time is un-chivalrous? I'm not trying to he deliberately argumentative, just intrigued by your opening statement that "chivalry is dead on many".
Does chivalry mean paying for everything in perpetuity? What if the lady feels uncomfortable with this and wants to pay her own way for once? Would you feel less of a man?
As I say not being deliberately cantankerous just curious as to the reasoning behind you thinking its 'doing the right thing' to always pay for everything. Some ladies might find that patronising wouldn't they? "
Typical tight brummie
*runs away quickly .. lol * x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
It's not about my wallet or ability to pay, I think it's more about doing the right thing
So do you think that any guy who doesn't pay all of the costs all of the time is un-chivalrous? I'm not trying to he deliberately argumentative, just intrigued by your opening statement that "chivalry is dead on many".
Does chivalry mean paying for everything in perpetuity? What if the lady feels uncomfortable with this and wants to pay her own way for once? Would you feel less of a man?
As I say not being deliberately cantankerous just curious as to the reasoning behind you thinking its 'doing the right thing' to always pay for everything. Some ladies might find that patronising wouldn't they?
Typical tight brummie
*runs away quickly .. lol * x
"
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By *eesideMan
over a year ago
margate sumwear by the sea |
"A woman in the usa got asked out for a date in a very expensive restaurant when the bill arrived she realised he had left her to pay ever happened to you?"
Wot a £#*&!%@ jark.............
It's cos of people like this that the nice guys like me ect don't get givvon a chance  .....
If anything makes my blud boil its crap people hoo doo things like this and making it hard for the rest of us.......
Rant over |
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"As a gentleman I would never expect the lady to pay, whatever the night was to bring. I find chivalry is dead on many. Such a pain being nice lol
You are a breath of fresh air xx
Thank-you, it's the way I have always done things. Shame ladies like bad men mostly lol x
Just to be clear - are you talking about a first date or ALL dates? So if you start regularly dating someone you will continue to always pay for everything, whatever the situation?
If so I wouldn't necessarily call that chivalry. I'd call that exploitation.
If you mean just the first few dates then I agree with you and I also like to pay for the initial date. But if and when we start going steady there's a limit to how far my generosity can extend!
It's not exploitation, it's my choice to pay. Meals, drinks whatever. It's how I was brought up
Good for you and if it makes you happy so be it. You said in your original post that chivalry is dead on many. I respectfully disagree with you that not paying for every date and not absorbing 100% of all costs over time with a regular date is un-chivalrous. On this I think we will need to agree to disagree.
I believe chivalry is alive and well and not demonstrated by the depth of a wallet."
Have to agree!
Even if a guy was a genuine friend and loaded (sadly I'm not) I'd at least want to fork out for a bottle of wine or coffee and cake on occasion - otherwise I'd feel that I was using him - and that's not something I do! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A woman in the usa got asked out for a date in a very expensive restaurant when the bill arrived she realised he had left her to pay ever happened to you?
No. nobody asks me on a date
Fancy a date "
Only if you're paying |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a gentleman I would never expect the lady to pay, whatever the night was to bring. I find chivalry is dead on many. Such a pain being nice lol
good for you too."
Thank-you very much |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
It's not about my wallet or ability to pay, I think it's more about doing the right thing
So do you think that any guy who doesn't pay all of the costs all of the time is un-chivalrous? I'm not trying to he deliberately argumentative, just intrigued by your opening statement that "chivalry is dead on many".
Does chivalry mean paying for everything in perpetuity? What if the lady feels uncomfortable with this and wants to pay her own way for once? Would you feel less of a man?
As I say not being deliberately cantankerous just curious as to the reasoning behind you thinking its 'doing the right thing' to always pay for everything. Some ladies might find that patronising wouldn't they?
Typical tight brummie
*runs away quickly .. lol * x
"
ha I'm not tight, just careful! 
In a seriousness I seek a relationship of equals not one where man is the breadwinner and pays for everything and the woman is dutiful at home baking cakes and looking pretty. Seems all very 1950s to me.
I will pay for a date when I ask someone out. Probably the first few to be honest. But assuming we start dating regularly and we are both earning a similar full time salary as each other, I would think I was being exploited or used if I was always expected to pay all of the time. But if it makes anyone feel chivalrous and they're happy to do it, good for them
I think chivalry comes in many different forms than simply paying the bill all the time!
And I'm originally from Smethwick! lol
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Was on a double date once, and left mid main, after chucking a tenner at my mate, I stormed out, you know a date is over, when she says Africans should be castrated, to stop them having more kids, good job we weren't on a single date, that would have been harder to storm out of |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Never left a woman to pay the bill..have asked for the bill before deserts and said I'm sorry but got to go and won't be in touch....but always picked the bill up...maybe old fashioned but never expet a lady to pay when I've asked her out or even if she has asked me out... |
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"As a gentleman, if I were to go on a date I'd of course choose the restaurant, the wine and the best food available I can get a groupon for. There is absolutely no way I'd expect a woman to drive herself to the place, if I'm going by bus so can she.
The advantage of a groupon in this situation (and I'm sure you ladies can see the romance in this), is that actually when the bill comes, even if she refuses to pay the whole thing, you've both saved money."
This is hilarious .
I love voucher cloud .. but not sure how I would feel if a fella said they had a code on a first date ... |
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"There are those women who don't want to pay and never offer, that says a lot about them.
There are those women who insist on paying their way and refuse any compromise on that principal, that also says a bit about them.
There are those women who genuinely want to pay their way, sincerely offer to do so but then concede in a conscious attempt to allow you to massage your male ego whilst taking it as a compliment."
I always offer to pay and graciously accept however if it's more than one date I'm a believer in treating the man to a meal...it doesn't even have to be in a restaurant but cooking a man a meal and often or not that task doesn't come cheap in terms shopping for it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are those women who don't want to pay and never offer, that says a lot about them.
There are those women who insist on paying their way and refuse any compromise on that principal, that also says a bit about them.
There are those women who genuinely want to pay their way, sincerely offer to do so but then concede in a conscious attempt to allow you to massage your male ego whilst taking it as a compliment.
I always offer to pay and graciously accept however if it's more than one date I'm a believer in treating the man to a meal...it doesn't even have to be in a restaurant but cooking a man a meal and often or not that task doesn't come cheap in terms shopping for it "
Exactly this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are those women who don't want to pay and never offer, that says a lot about them.
There are those women who insist on paying their way and refuse any compromise on that principal, that also says a bit about them.
There are those women who genuinely want to pay their way, sincerely offer to do so but then concede in a conscious attempt to allow you to massage your male ego whilst taking it as a compliment.
I always offer to pay and graciously accept however if it's more than one date I'm a believer in treating the man to a meal...it doesn't even have to be in a restaurant but cooking a man a meal and often or not that task doesn't come cheap in terms shopping for it
Exactly this "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not happened.
I always offer to pay my half and on occasion, when I have asked him out, I have paid the bill and not allowed the man to pay unless he insisted. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not happened.
I always offer to pay my half and on occasion, when I have asked him out, I have paid the bill and not allowed the man to pay unless he insisted. "
when we going out then my lass lol ime only joking I've never let a women pay for a meal or a drink when I've been out with them x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not happened.
I always offer to pay my half and on occasion, when I have asked him out, I have paid the bill and not allowed the man to pay unless he insisted. when we going out then my lass lol ime only joking I've never let a women pay for a meal or a drink when I've been out with them x"
I have been single four years now and after the first few dates, that didn't work out, I just felt wrong because all I got out of it was a free meal. Started to feel like I was only going on dates for a free meal or drink. Couldn't live with the feeling, so I now offer to pay my way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If he pays for dinner then I'd pay for something else such as an activity but I would offer to pay for half the meal at least  but being honest it is nice to treated to a meal and feel pampered  "
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"A woman in the usa got asked out for a date in a very expensive restaurant when the bill arrived she realised he had left her to pay ever happened to you?"
this is why my first dates are at mcdonalds.....
okay.. that was a joke.. i like a classy burger joint like five guys!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I always give much more respect to those ladies who offer to pay. In the end I never let them pay but I hate it when a woman feels that she doesn't even have to offer to pay."
I always share and hotels as well |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A woman in the usa got asked out for a date in a very expensive restaurant when the bill arrived she realised he had left her to pay ever happened to you?"
nope. but i know how to wangle me a free meal now. cheers |
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