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Passed... present appreciation
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
I've derailed the other thread enough.
There seems to be a need (small, maybe) for people to have somewhere to share their appreciation for their deceased parents. For some of us this is very recent, for others it has been a while, but we have our parents who are no more on our minds.
On this day of appreciation threads please use this one to share the memories of what you appreciated about your parents.
If you want to complain please do it on the other thread (sorry OP of the other thread).
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"The buggers are still alive and spending like it's going out of fashion  "
Good for them. It's their money.
One of the things I appreciate about my Mum is that she used her retirement to go everywhere. She had four or five holidays a year and saw more of the world than I have managed.
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"The buggers are still alive and spending like it's going out of fashion
Good for them. It's their money.
One of the things I appreciate about my Mum is that she used her retirement to go everywhere. She had four or five holidays a year and saw more of the world than I have managed.
"
My mum keeps saying, "When we've got money we'll do X,Y and Z..."
Well stop bloody spending it 
As you point out, it's theirs to spend. Personally, I'd just keep it in a coal scuttle by the fire marked 'Money to burn.'
Nut jobs.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"The buggers are still alive and spending like it's going out of fashion
Good for them. It's their money.
One of the things I appreciate about my Mum is that she used her retirement to go everywhere. She had four or five holidays a year and saw more of the world than I have managed.
My mum keeps saying, "When we've got money we'll do X,Y and Z..."
Well stop bloody spending it
As you point out, it's theirs to spend. Personally, I'd just keep it in a coal scuttle by the fire marked 'Money to burn.'
Nut jobs.
"
But they are YOUR nut jobs. One day your offspring will be saying the same of you.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've derailed the other thread enough.
There seems to be a need (small, maybe) for people to have somewhere to share their appreciation for their deceased parents. For some of us this is very recent, for others it has been a while, but we have our parents who are no more on our minds.
On this day of appreciation threads please use this one to share the memories of what you appreciated about your parents.
If you want to complain please do it on the other thread (sorry OP of the other thread).
"
What a beautiful idea lickety.
For my late mother and father. Troubled in their early years, finding each other in their middle years and losing each other in their later years thanks to the twin hells of dementia and parkinsons disease.
And my beautiful daughter, lost to leukemia.
To anyone who's lost someone they care about, sorry for your loss. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I've derailed the other thread enough.
There seems to be a need (small, maybe) for people to have somewhere to share their appreciation for their deceased parents. For some of us this is very recent, for others it has been a while, but we have our parents who are no more on our minds.
On this day of appreciation threads please use this one to share the memories of what you appreciated about your parents.
If you want to complain please do it on the other thread (sorry OP of the other thread).
What a beautiful idea lickety.
For my late mother and father. Troubled in their early years, finding each other in their middle years and losing each other in their later years thanks to the twin hells of dementia and parkinsons disease.
And my beautiful daughter, lost to leukemia.
To anyone who's lost someone they care about, sorry for your loss."
They are only lost if we forget them. I know that your parents and daughter live on in your heart.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've derailed the other thread enough.
There seems to be a need (small, maybe) for people to have somewhere to share their appreciation for their deceased parents. For some of us this is very recent, for others it has been a while, but we have our parents who are no more on our minds.
On this day of appreciation threads please use this one to share the memories of what you appreciated about your parents.
If you want to complain please do it on the other thread (sorry OP of the other thread).
What a beautiful idea lickety.
For my late mother and father. Troubled in their early years, finding each other in their middle years and losing each other in their later years thanks to the twin hells of dementia and parkinsons disease.
And my beautiful daughter, lost to leukemia.
To anyone who's lost someone they care about, sorry for your loss.
They are only lost if we forget them. I know that your parents and daughter live on in your heart.
"
That they do.....
One my tattoos is an angel drawn by my daughter, I take her everywhere...... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Lovely thread OP... have lost both my parents, Dad will be 5 years next week and Mum 9 years in Jan....both stupidly young, and both to stupid cancer.
Love & light to anyone who is missing loved ones at xmas & throughout the year xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lovely thread OP... have lost both my parents, Dad will be 5 years next week and Mum 9 years in Jan....both stupidly young, and both to stupid cancer.
Love & light to anyone who is missing loved ones at xmas & throughout the year xxx"
So have I but I have more respect for them than to pay them respects on the Net not to mind a forum like this... my tuppence worth |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Lovely thread OP... have lost both my parents, Dad will be 5 years next week and Mum 9 years in Jan....both stupidly young, and both to stupid cancer.
Love & light to anyone who is missing loved ones at xmas & throughout the year xxx"
December and January to book-end the year.  Peace and love to you.
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"The buggers are still alive and spending like it's going out of fashion
Good for them. It's their money.
One of the things I appreciate about my Mum is that she used her retirement to go everywhere. She had four or five holidays a year and saw more of the world than I have managed.
My mum keeps saying, "When we've got money we'll do X,Y and Z..."
Well stop bloody spending it
As you point out, it's theirs to spend. Personally, I'd just keep it in a coal scuttle by the fire marked 'Money to burn.'
Nut jobs.
But they are YOUR nut jobs. One day your offspring will be saying the same of you.
"
In all likelihood, yes.
But we're going for a bold (and possibly futile but I think it worth a shot what the heck!) move to break the cycle of intergenerational madness.
Wish us luck.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Lovely thread OP... have lost both my parents, Dad will be 5 years next week and Mum 9 years in Jan....both stupidly young, and both to stupid cancer.
Love & light to anyone who is missing loved ones at xmas & throughout the year xxx
So have I but I have more respect for them than to pay them respects on the Net not to mind a forum like this... my tuppence worth "
And you're entitled to it. We all have different ways of expressing our love. Over the years I have been on here I have found many find care and comfort from sharing their stories on the forum.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lovely thread OP... have lost both my parents, Dad will be 5 years next week and Mum 9 years in Jan....both stupidly young, and both to stupid cancer.
Love & light to anyone who is missing loved ones at xmas & throughout the year xxx
So have I but I have more respect for them than to pay them respects on the Net not to mind a forum like this... my tuppence worth "
Just to be clear following a comment, I have no issue with anyone paying respects in anyway they wish to. It's just not my thing to do it on the Net be it here or Fakebook or any other social media platform. It's my opinion and no slur on anyone that chooses to do otherwise.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've derailed the other thread enough.
There seems to be a need (small, maybe) for people to have somewhere to share their appreciation for their deceased parents. For some of us this is very recent, for others it has been a while, but we have our parents who are no more on our minds.
On this day of appreciation threads please use this one to share the memories of what you appreciated about your parents.
If you want to complain please do it on the other thread (sorry OP of the other thread).
What a beautiful idea lickety.
For my late mother and father. Troubled in their early years, finding each other in their middle years and losing each other in their later years thanks to the twin hells of dementia and parkinsons disease.
And my beautiful daughter, lost to leukemia.
To anyone who's lost someone they care about, sorry for your loss."
Oh, Markoh!
I can't even...
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"Lovely thread OP... have lost both my parents, Dad will be 5 years next week and Mum 9 years in Jan....both stupidly young, and both to stupid cancer.
Love & light to anyone who is missing loved ones at xmas & throughout the year xxx
So have I but I have more respect for them than to pay them respects on the Net not to mind a forum like this... my tuppence worth
Just to be clear following a comment, I have no issue with anyone paying respects in anyway they wish to. It's just not my thing to do it on the Net be it here or Fakebook or any other social media platform. It's my opinion and no slur on anyone that chooses to do otherwise.. "
Reading your post above I think perhaps you could have worded it better, it does read as if you at implying that the poster above is disrespectful for choosing to share her story. You don't want to and that is your right of course but have some compassion for those who do.
It's rubbish to lose anyone and we all deal in different ways. It is indeed a sore subject no matter how much time passes and when someone makes a comment, even without meaning to offend, it can of trigger those emotions.
Just my tuppence worth.
Love and hugs to all who have lost someone. Deal with it how you chose xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I lost my mum to cancer almost 3 years ago, and still think of her every day.. and of course I always miss her more at this time of year..
also a lady I knew only very briefly but she was very helpful to me, committed suicide a couple of months ago and to be honest it's hit me harder than I first realised... |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I lost my mum to cancer almost 3 years ago, and still think of her every day.. and of course I always miss her more at this time of year..
also a lady I knew only very briefly but she was very helpful to me, committed suicide a couple of months ago and to be honest it's hit me harder than I first realised... "
I hope you find a way to work through it. Loss through suicide leaves such conflicted emotions.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lovely thread OP... have lost both my parents, Dad will be 5 years next week and Mum 9 years in Jan....both stupidly young, and both to stupid cancer.
Love & light to anyone who is missing loved ones at xmas & throughout the year xxx
So have I but I have more respect for them than to pay them respects on the Net not to mind a forum like this... my tuppence worth
Just to be clear following a comment, I have no issue with anyone paying respects in anyway they wish to. It's just not my thing to do it on the Net be it here or Fakebook or any other social media platform. It's my opinion and no slur on anyone that chooses to do otherwise..
Reading your post above I think perhaps you could have worded it better, it does read as if you at implying that the poster above is disrespectful for choosing to share her story. You don't want to and that is your right of course but have some compassion for those who do.
It's rubbish to lose anyone and we all deal in different ways. It is indeed a sore subject no matter how much time passes and when someone makes a comment, even without meaning to offend, it can of trigger those emotions.
Just my tuppence worth.
Love and hugs to all who have lost someone. Deal with it how you chose xx"
Yes I agree and think u are correct.. I'm a few years down the line now having lost both parents. It's still very raw with me so god knows how others feel...
I understand and tried to rectify immediately once told how it might read to others.
I won't be so quick to comment in the future.. again apologies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dad still alive.
Mum died about 5 years ago. 58 years old. An alcoholic most of her life. We hadn't spoken for 10 years after falling out. Her autopsy showed she was clean of booze and drugs when she died. I'm quite proud of her for that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My mum collected jars ....and used to put everything and anything in them...
She had the most irreverent humour as did her mother and me I suppose .....
She championed the cause of acceptance for people suggeringvwith agoraphobia....
She was an individual, artistic strong woman
What a lovely thread ... nice to say out loud at Xmas - as she is no longer here to counsel me or for me to say I love you x
Thank you OP X |
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Having lost my Mum in September it will be the first Christmas without her and it's the little things that have been hard....such as spending ages earlier this week finding a card suitable for my Dad that wasn't dripping with the joys of what a wonderful time of year it is. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dad at 49.hart attack.
Mum 52 cancer in her bones.
But she died of kidney failure.
She was given 3 hrs then 3 days then maybe 3 months funny how things go she died 3 year's later.
When I really think about it she was 49 when she got it.
Am 49 in February so it's on my mind a lot. That i be older than my dad got to soon |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've derailed the other thread enough.
There seems to be a need (small, maybe) for people to have somewhere to share their appreciation for their deceased parents. For some of us this is very recent, for others it has been a while, but we have our parents who are no more on our minds.
On this day of appreciation threads please use this one to share the memories of what you appreciated about your parents.
If you want to complain please do it on the other thread (sorry OP of the other thread).
What a beautiful idea lickety.
For my late mother and father. Troubled in their early years, finding each other in their middle years and losing each other in their later years thanks to the twin hells of dementia and parkinsons disease.
And my beautiful daughter, lost to leukemia.
To anyone who's lost someone they care about, sorry for your loss.
Oh, Markoh!
I can't even...
"
TY.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I lost my father in law to skin cancer five weeks ago. The most amazing caring generous self less man I had the pleasure to know. In all the years I knew him I never heard him say a bad word against anyone. Even though his illness he was helping others by doing clinical trials for groundbreaking cancer drug treatments.
I miss him. He was my dad. RIP |
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My dad died 14 years ago heart attack he had been poorly for a long time. my brother died 3 months after he was 40 had no health issues he just went to sleep and never woke up mum found him we never got an explanation why he died it was an open verdict . Another brother died last year in his sleep he had a heart attack my poor mum found him also
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
Both of my parents died many years ago, prematurely from heart attacks.
I remember my dad once made a wooden sledge for us. Trouble was, it was so heavy, it just sank in the snow! I loved it!
My mum used to make great cakes, and I loved her mince pies. To this day, I love baking mince pies, listening to Christmas carols.
Hugs to anyone missing people from their lives xxx
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Having lost my Mum in September it will be the first Christmas without her ..
Same here - I only missed one Christmas at home my entire life, it will seem wrong without her. "
The "firsts" of everything are particularly hard x
My mum passed away after end of life care just before Christmas a few years ago.
I now have a love / hate feeling for the season because everyday in December I recal the horrors of that time whilst still trying to 'enjoy' Christmas with the family.
The longer I'm without mum the more I miss her, time can't heal all. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Having lost my Mum in September it will be the first Christmas without her and it's the little things that have been hard....such as spending ages earlier this week finding a card suitable for my Dad that wasn't dripping with the joys of what a wonderful time of year it is. "
We had a similar problem recently. Blank cards and few words seemed right to us at the time.
Thank you for sharing and I hope you find some peace. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Dad at 49.hart attack.
Mum 52 cancer in her bones.
But she died of kidney failure.
She was given 3 hrs then 3 days then maybe 3 months funny how things go she died 3 year's later.
When I really think about it she was 49 when she got it.
Am 49 in February so it's on my mind a lot. That i be older than my dad got to soon"
Keep taking every day one at a time. A dear friend of mine became the first woman ever in her family to reach 51. At the time she was given a prognosis of 3 years to live. 10 years on she is still enjoying each day, one at a time.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I lost my father in law to skin cancer five weeks ago. The most amazing caring generous self less man I had the pleasure to know. In all the years I knew him I never heard him say a bad word against anyone. Even though his illness he was helping others by doing clinical trials for groundbreaking cancer drug treatments.
I miss him. He was my dad. RIP "
Honour him by living by his example. Sorry for you loss.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Having lost my Mum in September it will be the first Christmas without her ..
Same here - I only missed one Christmas at home my entire life, it will seem wrong without her. "
She's in your heart. Keep her there at the Christmas events. We're very good at not including our deceased loved ones for fear of upsetting or offending others but there is nothing wrong with acknowledging that you want them there, remembering what they would have enjoyed, knowing it is different and difficult and building new traditions.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My parents are in a bad way at the moment. I'm hoping my dad will see this Christmas. And my mum needs 2 new hips plus is having a spinal operation a week before Christmas. She's 80. It's not a good time for me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My parents are in a bad way at the moment. I'm hoping my dad will see this Christmas. And my mum needs 2 new hips plus is having a spinal operation a week before Christmas. She's 80. It's not a good time for me. "
Oh and last week was the anniversary of my sister's loss to cancer. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
As said on other post, lost Mum in April. Dreading Christmas without her, she was Christmas! But now have Dad to look after, he misses her desperately.Will spend Christmas period talking about the lovely times we had as a family and looking at old photos of us all together. Life goes on, but it doesn't get any easier. Hugs to you all |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"My parents are in a bad way at the moment. I'm hoping my dad will see this Christmas. And my mum needs 2 new hips plus is having a spinal operation a week before Christmas. She's 80. It's not a good time for me.
Oh and last week was the anniversary of my sister's loss to cancer. "
A virtual hug xxx |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"My parents are in a bad way at the moment. I'm hoping my dad will see this Christmas. And my mum needs 2 new hips plus is having a spinal operation a week before Christmas. She's 80. It's not a good time for me.
Oh and last week was the anniversary of my sister's loss to cancer. "
Bless you Clem, very difficult time for you, everyone on here know what you are going through. Hugs. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My parents are in a bad way at the moment. I'm hoping my dad will see this Christmas. And my mum needs 2 new hips plus is having a spinal operation a week before Christmas. She's 80. It's not a good time for me.
Oh and last week was the anniversary of my sister's loss to cancer. "
That's a toughie fella. Man hugs xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" My apologies for being a cunt on the forums. But I'm not feeling particularly keen to stroke egos at the moment. You're not a c**t, you're entitled to feel that way.  "
I am, but thanks x |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
" My apologies for being a cunt on the forums. But I'm not feeling particularly keen to stroke egos at the moment. You're not a c**t, you're entitled to feel that way.
I am, but thanks x "
x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm also really worried about funerals etc, organising finances and property etc all when my heads not right. All I want to do is curl up in the corner and cry. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Id like to remember 3 people if im allowed. My Mom who passed last year losing her fight with the big C also my dad who will have been past 4 years in Feb who also lost his fight with cancer and also my Wife who passed in her sleep 6 days before my Dad. I think about them all alot and miss them all dearly. R.I.P. xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Id like to remember 3 people if im allowed. My Mom who passed last year losing her fight with the big C also my dad who will have been past 4 years in Feb who also lost his fight with cancer and also my Wife who passed in her sleep 6 days before my Dad. I think about them all alot and miss them all dearly. R.I.P. xxx "
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
" I'm also really worried about funerals etc, organising finances and property etc all when my heads not right. All I want to do is curl up in the corner and cry. "
We all worry about that. There is help and dealing with it all now us easier than waiting. Trust me on this. |
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"Having lost my Mum in September it will be the first Christmas without her ..
Same here - I only missed one Christmas at home my entire life, it will seem wrong without her.
She's in your heart. Keep her there at the Christmas events. We're very good at not including our deceased loved ones for fear of upsetting or offending others but there is nothing wrong with acknowledging that you want them there, remembering what they would have enjoyed, knowing it is different and difficult and building new traditions.
"
Yeah, the naughty chair on the corner will be vacant for her and her cryptic comments about the turkey having no personality this year....
I might be forced to play scrabble though!  |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Id like to remember 3 people if im allowed. My Mom who passed last year losing her fight with the big C also my dad who will have been past 4 years in Feb who also lost his fight with cancer and also my Wife who passed in her sleep 6 days before my Dad. I think about them all alot and miss them all dearly. R.I.P. xxx "
No permission needed. You've experienced a lot in a short time.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Having lost my Mum in September it will be the first Christmas without her ..
Same here - I only missed one Christmas at home my entire life, it will seem wrong without her.
She's in your heart. Keep her there at the Christmas events. We're very good at not including our deceased loved ones for fear of upsetting or offending others but there is nothing wrong with acknowledging that you want them there, remembering what they would have enjoyed, knowing it is different and difficult and building new traditions.
Yeah, the naughty chair on the corner will be vacant for her and her cryptic comments about the turkey having no personality this year....
I might be forced to play scrabble though! "
Make Mum Scrabble - only words she would use. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most. "
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"Id like to remember 3 people if im allowed. My Mom who passed last year losing her fight with the big C also my dad who will have been past 4 years in Feb who also lost his fight with cancer and also my Wife who passed in her sleep 6 days before my Dad. I think about them all alot and miss them all dearly. R.I.P. xxx "
Hugs to you. x |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
" I'm also really worried about funerals etc, organising finances and property etc all when my heads not right. All I want to do is curl up in the corner and cry. "
Try not to worry too much. Funeral directors are very good at guiding you through the arrangements. Don't rush the financial/property side of things, until you are ready. All organisations, I dealt with, for mum, were excellent and made things relatively easy for me. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess. "
You are so right. My mum knew she had had enough and we had to accept her decision when she opted for a DNR(do not resuscitate). |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most. "
Enjoy them. Dreading it won't change the one other certainty we have in life but building memories and enjoyable times helps to ensure you don't just feel guilty when that certain day arrives.
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
Enjoy them. Dreading it won't change the one other certainty we have in life but building memories and enjoyable times helps to ensure you don't just feel guilty when that certain day arrives.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess. "
I have mixed feelings on this because my mum always said she wouldn't want to live without quality of life, when that time came she fought until the last breath to stay alive.
I've been through a lot with elderly parents, I'll always help via a PM if anyone wants a chat. |
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"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess. "
This is where my sometimes death is kinder comment comes in. Big hugs to you x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Id like to remember 3 people if im allowed. My Mom who passed last year losing her fight with the big C also my dad who will have been past 4 years in Feb who also lost his fight with cancer and also my Wife who passed in her sleep 6 days before my Dad. I think about them all alot and miss them all dearly. R.I.P. xxx
No permission needed. You've experienced a lot in a short time.
"
Thankyou Lickety. Always good to talk about them |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
I lost both of my parents at a young age (14 & 23) which was tough. Mum from bowel cancer and dad took his own life, that would of been slightly easier to deal with had he left us a note.
I remember them every day. Mum for the kind hearted lady she was and dad for doing his best for us in her absence.
In a way I'm glad I don't have to deal with the old age thing but of course I'd do anything to have them back. Just so they could meet my children because they've missed out massively.
Gtg.....I'm welling up (it still hurts)
(((((Hugs)))) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I'm also really worried about funerals etc, organising finances and property etc all when my heads not right. All I want to do is curl up in the corner and cry. "
I guess that's where wives come in handy xx |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I lost both of my parents at a young age (14 & 23) which was tough. Mum from bowel cancer and dad took his own life, that would of been slightly easier to deal with had he left us a note.
I remember them every day. Mum for the kind hearted lady she was and dad for doing his best for us in her absence.
In a way I'm glad I don't have to deal with the old age thing but of course I'd do anything to have them back. Just so they could meet my children because they've missed out massively.
Gtg.....I'm welling up (it still hurts)
(((((Hugs))))"
Tears help.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
" I'm also really worried about funerals etc, organising finances and property etc all when my heads not right. All I want to do is curl up in the corner and cry.
I guess that's where wives come in handy xx"
It is indeed. Take care of each other. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess.
I have mixed feelings on this because my mum always said she wouldn't want to live without quality of life, when that time came she fought until the last breath to stay alive.
I've been through a lot with elderly parents, I'll always help via a PM if anyone wants a chat."
Hmmmm I know what you mean, I saw that with my sister who didn't see 40. I think she had cancer to fight against. Whereas old age seems to be completely debilitating. If you can't talk because you can't breathe properly or moving or touching anything gives you more pain than your painkillers can cope with then I think you begin to welcome the rainbow. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I lost both of my parents at a young age (14 & 23) which was tough. Mum from bowel cancer and dad took his own life, that would of been slightly easier to deal with had he left us a note.
I remember them every day. Mum for the kind hearted lady she was and dad for doing his best for us in her absence.
In a way I'm glad I don't have to deal with the old age thing but of course I'd do anything to have them back. Just so they could meet my children because they've missed out massively.
Gtg.....I'm welling up (it still hurts)
(((((Hugs))))"
Gosh..Bless you darling..and big hugs.xx |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess.
I have mixed feelings on this because my mum always said she wouldn't want to live without quality of life, when that time came she fought until the last breath to stay alive.
I've been through a lot with elderly parents, I'll always help via a PM if anyone wants a chat.
Hmmmm I know what you mean, I saw that with my sister who didn't see 40. I think she had cancer to fight against. Whereas old age seems to be completely debilitating. If you can't talk because you can't breathe properly or moving or touching anything gives you more pain than your painkillers can cope with then I think you begin to welcome the rainbow. "
Hey, I think you are right. My mum was always positive throughout her illnesses, but it seemed like she picked her time to go.maybe sounds silly, but we all felt that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess.
I have mixed feelings on this because my mum always said she wouldn't want to live without quality of life, when that time came she fought until the last breath to stay alive.
I've been through a lot with elderly parents, I'll always help via a PM if anyone wants a chat.
Hmmmm I know what you mean, I saw that with my sister who didn't see 40. I think she had cancer to fight against. Whereas old age seems to be completely debilitating. If you can't talk because you can't breathe properly or moving or touching anything gives you more pain than your painkillers can cope with then I think you begin to welcome the rainbow. "
Yeah I get what you mean, I think it sometimes can come down to the pain management & the length of time one has to endure it for...
x |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess.
I have mixed feelings on this because my mum always said she wouldn't want to live without quality of life, when that time came she fought until the last breath to stay alive.
I've been through a lot with elderly parents, I'll always help via a PM if anyone wants a chat.
Hmmmm I know what you mean, I saw that with my sister who didn't see 40. I think she had cancer to fight against. Whereas old age seems to be completely debilitating. If you can't talk because you can't breathe properly or moving or touching anything gives you more pain than your painkillers can cope with then I think you begin to welcome the rainbow. "
I think you come to really know the person at that point. My mother was a dedicated, practicing Christian but when things became too difficult she contemplated suicide. She begged to die. That passed and, in the end, it was another five years before she just died. No drama, which is strangely difficult after so much drama. |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
For all the strong women who I've been lucky enough to have in my life.
My grandma who raised 6 children and gave birth to my dad under a Bellstaff sink during an air raid.
My mum for putting up with me
And June the best mother in law you could ask for.. She welcomed me with open arms and an open mind. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I'm also really worried about funerals etc, organising finances and property etc all when my heads not right. All I want to do is curl up in the corner and cry. "
I felt the same when we lost my father, very unexpectedly.
Because he wasn't terminally Ill hi's death came as a huge surprise, so we hadn't planned anything.
Everything was a shock and a huge learning curve.
What we did find was their coroner and the funeral directors were a massive help.
You know what, you just muddle through it and everything seems to work itself out.
For me, the grief came much later.
If my experience is of benefit to anyone, my filters are open. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
" I'm also really worried about funerals etc, organising finances and property etc all when my heads not right. All I want to do is curl up in the corner and cry.
I felt the same when we lost my father, very unexpectedly.
Because he wasn't terminally Ill hi's death came as a huge surprise, so we hadn't planned anything.
Everything was a shock and a huge learning curve.
What we did find was their coroner and the funeral directors were a massive help.
You know what, you just muddle through it and everything seems to work itself out.
For me, the grief came much later.
If my experience is of benefit to anyone, my filters are open."
Well said |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess.
You are so right. My mum knew she had had enough and we had to accept her decision when she opted for a DNR(do not resuscitate). "
Unfortunately my mother's dementia left her unable to make that decision, so we had to.
Fuck me that was a tough choice to make..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am very lucky still to have mine, my mum is 71 but has been feeling 'old' for a number of years now, partly because her parents were so old when they had her, for the past ten years she has been in and out of the doctors and developed breathing problems, I initially thought it was because she was overweight and didn't get much excercise, when in fact it was copd. My mum was never much of a go getter but she would always take pride in her appearance and would go places on the bus and go on holidays abroad. Sadly now she doesn't do any of those things and I am sure she is waiting for the day the fight is over BUT if one good thing that has happened in the past two years, since I broke up with my ex, I have seen her more in the past year than I ever did in fifteen years of marriage, I talk to her at least three times a week and she adores ads, I love her to pieces and it's going to break my heart when she does go.
My dad, well my dad is a man that survives on four hours sleep an evening, gets up for his milkround at 10.30pm and goes off and comes home and does it all again, instead of making my adult brother find his own way home from work he breaks his sleep up to go and get him, how the hell he is still here I have no idea, I very often check my phone in the middle of the night expecting a call from my mum to say he has fallen asleep at the wheel of his milk float (has happened a few times) but again, if I hadn't of split from my ex, I have spoken to my dad again more times that I ever did in my marriage in the last year, we've actually had conversations (not a big talker my dad),
He has spoken more to ads then he ever did to my ex and I do feel very blessed that I seemed to have repaired a cracked relationship that I never really knew I had with them, this Christmas they are coming to us on Boxing Day and again, we've been here three months and this will be the third time they have been over for lunch, they only ever did once in fifteen years before.
So I am greatful that I have been able to fix things before it was too late xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am very lucky still to have mine, my mum is 71 but has been feeling 'old' for a number of years now, partly because her parents were so old when they had her, for the past ten years she has been in and out of the doctors and developed breathing problems, I initially thought it was because she was overweight and didn't get much excercise, when in fact it was copd. My mum was never much of a go getter but she would always take pride in her appearance and would go places on the bus and go on holidays abroad. Sadly now she doesn't do any of those things and I am sure she is waiting for the day the fight is over BUT if one good thing that has happened in the past two years, since I broke up with my ex, I have seen her more in the past year than I ever did in fifteen years of marriage, I talk to her at least three times a week and she adores ads, I love her to pieces and it's going to break my heart when she does go.
My dad, well my dad is a man that survives on four hours sleep an evening, gets up for his milkround at 10.30pm and goes off and comes home and does it all again, instead of making my adult brother find his own way home from work he breaks his sleep up to go and get him, how the hell he is still here I have no idea, I very often check my phone in the middle of the night expecting a call from my mum to say he has fallen asleep at the wheel of his milk float (has happened a few times) but again, if I hadn't of split from my ex, I have spoken to my dad again more times that I ever did in my marriage in the last year, we've actually had conversations (not a big talker my dad),
He has spoken more to ads then he ever did to my ex and I do feel very blessed that I seemed to have repaired a cracked relationship that I never really knew I had with them, this Christmas they are coming to us on Boxing Day and again, we've been here three months and this will be the third time they have been over for lunch, they only ever did once in fifteen years before.
So I am greatful that I have been able to fix things before it was too late xx"
Inspiring.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"... I have spoken to my dad again more times that I ever did in my marriage in the last year, we've actually had conversations (not a big talker my dad),
He has spoken more to ads then he ever did to my ex and I do feel very blessed that I seemed to have repaired a cracked relationship that I never really knew I had with them, this Christmas they are coming to us on Boxing Day and again, we've been here three months and this will be the third time they have been over for lunch, they only ever did once in fifteen years before.
So I am greatful that I have been able to fix things before it was too late xx"
This is the important bit.
People make time to attend funerals but not to ensure the relationships are strong when the person is alive. Just tell the people you love that you love them.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Both parents gone but I am thankful to be at the stage where I can replace the sadness of losing them with happy memories
It's the significant events...my son's great exam results this year where I wanted to pick up the phone and tell my Mum but instead I focused on imagining her reaction and that gets me past the 'intake of breath' moment of how much I miss them both.
Hard but I also think that they would be sad if I didn't live my life as happy as I can be
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Both parents gone but I am thankful to be at the stage where I can replace the sadness of losing them with happy memories
It's the significant events...my son's great exam results this year where I wanted to pick up the phone and tell my Mum but instead I focused on imagining her reaction and that gets me past the 'intake of breath' moment of how much I miss them both.
Hard but I also think that they would be sad if I didn't live my life as happy as I can be
"
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess.
You are so right. My mum knew she had had enough and we had to accept her decision when she opted for a DNR(do not resuscitate).
Unfortunately my mother's dementia left her unable to make that decision, so we had to.
Fuck me that was a tough choice to make..... "
Gosh..it must have been, so sorry you had to make that choice.x |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I am very lucky still to have mine, my mum is 71 but has been feeling 'old' for a number of years now, partly because her parents were so old when they had her, for the past ten years she has been in and out of the doctors and developed breathing problems, I initially thought it was because she was overweight and didn't get much excercise, when in fact it was copd. My mum was never much of a go getter but she would always take pride in her appearance and would go places on the bus and go on holidays abroad. Sadly now she doesn't do any of those things and I am sure she is waiting for the day the fight is over BUT if one good thing that has happened in the past two years, since I broke up with my ex, I have seen her more in the past year than I ever did in fifteen years of marriage, I talk to her at least three times a week and she adores ads, I love her to pieces and it's going to break my heart when she does go.
My dad, well my dad is a man that survives on four hours sleep an evening, gets up for his milkround at 10.30pm and goes off and comes home and does it all again, instead of making my adult brother find his own way home from work he breaks his sleep up to go and get him, how the hell he is still here I have no idea, I very often check my phone in the middle of the night expecting a call from my mum to say he has fallen asleep at the wheel of his milk float (has happened a few times) but again, if I hadn't of split from my ex, I have spoken to my dad again more times that I ever did in my marriage in the last year, we've actually had conversations (not a big talker my dad),
He has spoken more to ads then he ever did to my ex and I do feel very blessed that I seemed to have repaired a cracked relationship that I never really knew I had with them, this Christmas they are coming to us on Boxing Day and again, we've been here three months and this will be the third time they have been over for lunch, they only ever did once in fifteen years before.
So I am greatful that I have been able to fix things before it was too late xx"
That's a lovely story. Make the most of your parents while you still have them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess.
You are so right. My mum knew she had had enough and we had to accept her decision when she opted for a DNR(do not resuscitate).
Unfortunately my mother's dementia left her unable to make that decision, so we had to.
Fuck me that was a tough choice to make.....
Gosh..it must have been, so sorry you had to make that choice.x"
One or two tearful chats with my sister that's for sure.
In the end, she passed and it was out of our hands.
Silent prayers said that night.... |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess.
You are so right. My mum knew she had had enough and we had to accept her decision when she opted for a DNR(do not resuscitate).
Unfortunately my mother's dementia left her unable to make that decision, so we had to.
Fuck me that was a tough choice to make.....
Gosh..it must have been, so sorry you had to make that choice.x
One or two tearful chats with my sister that's for sure.
In the end, she passed and it was out of our hands.
Silent prayers said that night...."
Aha, so sad..but happy release, as they say.x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" My apologies for being a cunt on the forums. But I'm not feeling particularly keen to stroke egos at the moment. "
You never ever have to be sorry, never really spoken to you but you always seem like a strong person and even the strongest people have times of struggle, that's one of the weirdest but yet nicest things about here, it's a community and yet we have the strange 'hobby' we are all still people at the end of the day, we all have feelings, you are never alone here, you always have someone to speak to or rant at.
Keep being you and you will get through this.
X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm still lucky enough to have mine but it's one of the things I'm dreading the most.
What I'm finding hard to deal with is that I want them both to live forever, however I'm getting the feeling that they have both had enough and would welcome the end. There's only so much loss of life quality a person can stand I guess.
You are so right. My mum knew she had had enough and we had to accept her decision when she opted for a DNR(do not resuscitate).
Unfortunately my mother's dementia left her unable to make that decision, so we had to.
Fuck me that was a tough choice to make.....
Gosh..it must have been, so sorry you had to make that choice.x
One or two tearful chats with my sister that's for sure.
In the end, she passed and it was out of our hands.
Silent prayers said that night....
Aha, so sad..but happy release, as they say.x"
Indeed.....
In the end it was almost farcical. She'd been barely alive for months.
In the early hours of the morning we got the "come now" call.
She rallied, improved and we went home. 180 mile round trip.
Rinse and repeat for the next 4 nights.
By day five we were shattered.
Night six, nothing. She faught and faught to stay with us.
I woke up at 8am day 7 to a message saying she'd gone in the night.
I still think she was paying me back for all the trouble I'd caused her growing up.
Miss her like crazy....
My tiny weeny batshit crazy mum.
*she was shorter than Lickety.
Do not tell Lickety this. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"
Silent prayers said that night....
Aha, so sad..but happy release, as they say.x
Indeed.....
In the end it was almost farcical. She'd been barely alive for months.
In the early hours of the morning we got the "come now" call.
She rallied, improved and we went home. 180 mile round trip.
Rinse and repeat for the next 4 nights.
By day five we were shattered.
Night six, nothing. She faught and faught to stay with us.
I woke up at 8am day 7 to a message saying she'd gone in the night.
I still think she was paying me back for all the trouble I'd caused her growing up.
Miss her like crazy....
My tiny weeny batshit crazy mum.
*she was shorter than Lickety.
Do not tell Lickety this. "
Lickety... also batshit crazy. 
The number of deaths I have been at, or rather missed, as they all seem to wait until we leave them in peace to get on with it.
Mum did the same to us (just two nights, though) and she waited until we went home to bed.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Held my sister's hand as she slipped away. One of my happiest and most sorrowful memories. The way she stroked my young daughters hair just a few hours before will stay with me forever. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Held my sister's hand as she slipped away. One of my happiest and most sorrowful memories. The way she stroked my young daughters hair just a few hours before will stay with me forever. "
That is a very special privilege.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Silent prayers said that night....
Aha, so sad..but happy release, as they say.x
Indeed.....
In the end it was almost farcical. She'd been barely alive for months.
In the early hours of the morning we got the "come now" call.
She rallied, improved and we went home. 180 mile round trip.
Rinse and repeat for the next 4 nights.
By day five we were shattered.
Night six, nothing. She faught and faught to stay with us.
I woke up at 8am day 7 to a message saying she'd gone in the night.
I still think she was paying me back for all the trouble I'd caused her growing up.
Miss her like crazy....
My tiny weeny batshit crazy mum.
*she was shorter than Lickety.
Do not tell Lickety this.
Lickety... also batshit crazy.
The number of deaths I have been at, or rather missed, as they all seem to wait until we leave them in peace to get on with it.
Mum did the same to us (just two nights, though) and she waited until we went home to bed.
"
Mums eh? |
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What a lovely Idea...
My mums birthday on 17th and as always I'll shed a tear for her.
She was hospitalised for 22 years after a cerebral hemorrhage... blind and paralysed, with some brain damage but she was my mum and I loved her...and I love her still..I was holding her hand when she died...I told her if she was ready and wanted to go it was alright..and she went. I still dont know if that was right or wrong..all I know is that even now I still miss her.
Love to all of you who have lost someone they love, but as long as you remember them a part of them lives on in you.x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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".... This site gets more like Facebook every day ...
."
The thread is in the aptly named *The Lounge* so yes some conversations will be non sexual, maybe a hard concept for some to figure out.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What a lovely Idea...
My mums birthday on 17th and as always I'll shed a tear for her.
She was hospitalised for 22 years after a cerebral hemorrhage... blind and paralysed, with some brain damage but she was my mum and I loved her...and I love her still..I was holding her hand when she died...I told her if she was ready and wanted to go it was alright..and she went. I still dont know if that was right or wrong..all I know is that even now I still miss her.
Love to all of you who have lost someone they love, but as long as you remember them a part of them lives on in you.x"
I don't think there is a right or a wrong it's just in the moment. x |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"
Silent prayers said that night....
Aha, so sad..but happy release, as they say.x
Indeed.....
In the end it was almost farcical. She'd been barely alive for months.
In the early hours of the morning we got the "come now" call.
She rallied, improved and we went home. 180 mile round trip.
Rinse and repeat for the next 4 nights.
By day five we were shattered.
Night six, nothing. She faught and faught to stay with us.
I woke up at 8am day 7 to a message saying she'd gone in the night.
I still think she was paying me back for all the trouble I'd caused her growing up.
Miss her like crazy....
My tiny weeny batshit crazy mum.
*she was shorter than Lickety.
Do not tell Lickety this.
Lickety... also batshit crazy.
The number of deaths I have been at, or rather missed, as they all seem to wait until we leave them in peace to get on with it.
Mum did the same to us (just two nights, though) and she waited until we went home to bed.
This happened to us too..we had been with her most of the day, we got a call at 11pm, phoned round family and another call at 11.20pm, to say she had gone. This seems to happen a lot, but we all had our conversations with her, so she knew how much we loved he
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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".... This site gets more like Facebook every day ...
.
The thread is in the aptly named *The Lounge* so yes some conversations will be non sexual, maybe a hard concept for some to figure out.
"
Check out the sass on you! |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"What a lovely Idea...
My mums birthday on 17th and as always I'll shed a tear for her.
She was hospitalised for 22 years after a cerebral hemorrhage... blind and paralysed, with some brain damage but she was my mum and I loved her...and I love her still..I was holding her hand when she died...I told her if she was ready and wanted to go it was alright..and she went. I still dont know if that was right or wrong..all I know is that even now I still miss her.
Love to all of you who have lost someone they love, but as long as you remember them a part of them lives on in you.x"
You are right. Hugs!x |
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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago
.. |
I have lost both of my parents to cancer. I have learnt to live without them but when key events happen in my life I miss them terribly. This is particularly the case when it's anything to do with my children. They would be so proud of them and what they have achieved.
I had a wonderful upbringing and fantastic parents so I feel very lucky.
When I'm ill I still only want my Mum, yes, even at my age! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Memories of my mother... Her silliness. She was never afraid to act the clown when we were feeling a bit low. Her soft hearted nature. Her strength of character, despite a terrible childhood. Her fierce loyalty... Her cuddles, and her laugh. She was loved by most who met her. At least I have the privilege of calling this wonderful woman my mum.... Even if the pain of no longer having her in my life, from quite a young age feels like a physical pain sometimes. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
Thank you all for your continuing posts. It has been very moving to read.
Today has been a funny one for me as it's the first time I have been back to my usual routine, except it didn't include dropping into the home to see Mum. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"Thank you all for your continuing posts. It has been very moving to read.
Today has been a funny one for me as it's the first time I have been back to my usual routine, except it didn't include dropping into the home to see Mum."
Bless you lovely, know how you are feeling. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Thank you all for your continuing posts. It has been very moving to read.
Today has been a funny one for me as it's the first time I have been back to my usual routine, except it didn't include dropping into the home to see Mum."
Kisses and hugs to you lovely. And so sorry for your loss xx |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Thank you all for your continuing posts. It has been very moving to read.
Today has been a funny one for me as it's the first time I have been back to my usual routine, except it didn't include dropping into the home to see Mum.
Kisses and hugs to you lovely. And so sorry for your loss xx"
Thank you, and Samiss.
The World keeps turning and it's back to work tomorrow. A new routine will start and I'll adjust.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you all for your continuing posts. It has been very moving to read.
Today has been a funny one for me as it's the first time I have been back to my usual routine, except it didn't include dropping into the home to see Mum."
Best thread in a long time.
Thank you for starting it Lickety. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"Thank you all for your continuing posts. It has been very moving to read.
Today has been a funny one for me as it's the first time I have been back to my usual routine, except it didn't include dropping into the home to see Mum.
Kisses and hugs to you lovely. And so sorry for your loss xx
Thank you, and Samiss.
The World keeps turning and it's back to work tomorrow. A new routine will start and I'll adjust.
"
You will adjust and I know this will be controversial for some, but I have had little signs from my mum, so I know she is around me. Bit scary at first, but very comfortingx |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"Thank you all for your continuing posts. It has been very moving to read.
Today has been a funny one for me as it's the first time I have been back to my usual routine, except it didn't include dropping into the home to see Mum.
Best thread in a long time.
Thank you for starting it Lickety. "
Agree with you Markoh xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I miss my parents a lot and my step dad, as I lost my Dad in my teens. My Mum always had everyone round Christmas Eve for fantastic home made food. A proper cooked ham, sausage rolls, mince pies and lots of treats. We all had a pre Christmas present to open. I wouldn't swap though, I'd rather have had the relatively short time with my lovely parents and step rather than longer with ones that weren't so great.
My sis and I have carried on the traditions they taught us.
Enjoy your parents whilst they're alive, you don't realise what you'll miss about them until they're gone.
Sarah x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I miss my parents a lot and my step dad, as I lost my Dad in my teens. My Mum always had everyone round Christmas Eve for fantastic home made food. A proper cooked ham, sausage rolls, mince pies and lots of treats. We all had a pre Christmas present to open. I wouldn't swap though, I'd rather have had the relatively short time with my lovely parents and step rather than longer with ones that weren't so great.
My sis and I have carried on the traditions they taught us.
Enjoy your parents whilst they're alive, you don't realise what you'll miss about them until they're gone.
Sarah x "
So true......... |
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I've been incredibly lucky as I've got to my age without having lost anyone I love. I know it's probably just a matter of time now as my parents are late 70's early 80's,I wished I lived closer to home. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dad passed away 22 years ago after a car crash.
We always waited for him to come home from abroad to have Christmas together,I can remember we celebrated Christmas on the 8th of January once.
This is one of the main reasons I don't celebrate Christmas anymore,not the same without the big guy.
His humour and daftness still live on in me though.
Huge hugs&loving peace to anyone who lost loved ones at this time of year. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Dad passed away 22 years ago after a car crash.
We always waited for him to come home from abroad to have Christmas together,I can remember we celebrated Christmas on the 8th of January once.
This is one of the main reasons I don't celebrate Christmas anymore,not the same without the big guy.
His humour and daftness still live on in me though.
Huge hugs&loving peace to anyone who lost loved ones at this time of year."
Your brief description sounds like your father would want you to celebrate Christmas... but you're still waiting for him to come back. I wish you peace.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Your brief description sounds like your father would want you to celebrate Christmas... but you're still waiting for him to come back. I wish you peace.
"
All this time I never thought of it like that.many thanks OP,i might just put up a tree this year.bless you hun x |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"
Your brief description sounds like your father would want you to celebrate Christmas... but you're still waiting for him to come back. I wish you peace.
All this time I never thought of it like that.many thanks OP,i might just put up a tree this year.bless you hun x"
Hey, go for it and put your tree up, your dad may have loved that! hugs. Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I miss my mum it has been 5 years and in that time my whole family has fallen apart my dad does not even speak to me any more, despite me leaving him a message every week asking for him to spend time with me and his grandson I did nothing wrong he just does not care. I could really use her advice and just talk to her again she was the strongest bravest woman I know and I miss her every day.
Mrs |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I miss my mum it has been 5 years and in that time my whole family has fallen apart my dad does not even speak to me any more, despite me leaving him a message every week asking for him to spend time with me and his grandson I did nothing wrong he just does not care. I could really use her advice and just talk to her again she was the strongest bravest woman I know and I miss her every day.
Mrs "
Bless you , maybe dad is struggling too, but that is no excuse. I miss talking to my mum too, this is my first Christmas without her and I am struggling to get in the Christmas mood |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I miss my mum it has been 5 years and in that time my whole family has fallen apart my dad does not even speak to me any more, despite me leaving him a message every week asking for him to spend time with me and his grandson I did nothing wrong he just does not care. I could really use her advice and just talk to her again she was the strongest bravest woman I know and I miss her every day.
Mrs
Bless you , maybe dad is struggling too, but that is no excuse. I miss talking to my mum too, this is my first Christmas without her and I am struggling to get in the Christmas mood "
He has a new girlfriend (well i say new they got together about 5 months after mum died) and she takes up all his time with her kids and what she wants to do (vile woman!).
The first Christmas is always the hardest but it does get easier over time. We light a candle on christmas day and it stays lit till the last person goes to bed, we do it for the loved ones who are with us in spirit. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I miss my mum it has been 5 years and in that time my whole family has fallen apart my dad does not even speak to me any more, despite me leaving him a message every week asking for him to spend time with me and his grandson I did nothing wrong he just does not care. I could really use her advice and just talk to her again she was the strongest bravest woman I know and I miss her every day.
Mrs
Bless you , maybe dad is struggling too, but that is no excuse. I miss talking to my mum too, this is my first Christmas without her and I am struggling to get in the Christmas mood
He has a new girlfriend (well i say new they got together about 5 months after mum died) and she takes up all his time with her kids and what she wants to do (vile woman!).
The first Christmas is always the hardest but it does get easier over time. We light a candle on christmas day and it stays lit till the last person goes to bed, we do it for the loved ones who are with us in spirit. "
I like the idea of the candle I'm going to do that!x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I lost my Dad two years ago gone October i miss him every day and hes always in my heart he was a loving Dad Grandad and great Grandad quick witted smart and a very proud man i just thank God i had him for my Dad and his spirit lives on in all who loved him |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I lost my Dad two years ago gone October i miss him every day and hes always in my heart he was a loving Dad Grandad and great Grandad quick witted smart and a very proud man i just thank God i had him for my Dad and his spirit lives on in all who loved him"
I think that's the lovely thing, the spirit does live on x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I miss my mum it has been 5 years and in that time my whole family has fallen apart my dad does not even speak to me any more, despite me leaving him a message every week asking for him to spend time with me and his grandson I did nothing wrong he just does not care. I could really use her advice and just talk to her again she was the strongest bravest woman I know and I miss her every day.
Mrs "
It might be that you remind him of her and he finds that hard?
Everyone grieves differently xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On Monday we lost ads cousin, it's heartbreaking this time of year and even more so for everyone the way he went, not just for us family and friends but the people involved when it happened, we feel so sad for everyone.
Although one good thing has happened through this, ads and his cousins all agreed that they don't spend enough time together anymore, they used to be like brothers at one stage, so if any good has come of this, then that's bringing family together again and hopefully we've raised some awareness this week and if we have helped saved a life, even though we couldn't save his cousin then he won't have died for nothing.
Much love
G x |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"On Monday we lost ads cousin, it's heartbreaking this time of year and even more so for everyone the way he went, not just for us family and friends but the people involved when it happened, we feel so sad for everyone.
Although one good thing has happened through this, ads and his cousins all agreed that they don't spend enough time together anymore, they used to be like brothers at one stage, so if any good has come of this, then that's bringing family together again and hopefully we've raised some awareness this week and if we have helped saved a life, even though we couldn't save his cousin then he won't have died for nothing.
Much love
G x"
Oh, bless you, lovely people. So some good has come from his passing, but it is still hard for you all. Hugs xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I lost my Dad two years ago gone October i miss him every day and hes always in my heart he was a loving Dad Grandad and great Grandad quick witted smart and a very proud man i just thank God i had him for my Dad and his spirit lives on in all who loved him
I think that's the lovely thing, the spirit does live on x"
I lost my partner suddenly six months after my Dad and what gives me a little comfort is knowing that the two of them are watching over me x |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I lost my Dad two years ago gone October i miss him every day and hes always in my heart he was a loving Dad Grandad and great Grandad quick witted smart and a very proud man i just thank God i had him for my Dad and his spirit lives on in all who loved him
I think that's the lovely thing, the spirit does live on x
I lost my partner suddenly six months after my Dad and what gives me a little comfort is knowing that the two of them are watching over me x"
Yes, that is a lovely thought. x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
The first Christmas is always the hardest but it does get easier over time. We light a candle on christmas day and it stays lit till the last person goes to bed, we do it for the loved ones who are with us in spirit. "
Ah I really like this idea, I've got the perfect candle in mind for it too |
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