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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I've just started dating a girl, however from speaking with some of my attached girl friends I'm receiving so many mixed etiquette views, ranging from I should be paying for everything on a night out and treat her like a princess, through to let her make contributions to the evening as we're living in the 21st Century, however do fully pamper her on special occasions.
Any views / opinions are gladly welcome. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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treat her as you will the rest of the relationship.
if you wanna pay then do that, if you wanna be financial equals go halves, if you wanna get her to pay then do it.
there are no rules. |
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I'd go more with....how do you want the future to look? (as in....start out paying for everything and you may be doing that forever).
I for one insist on paying at least part of everything I do on a date though two things play into this: 1-who earns more and by how much? If he brings me out somewhere expensive and can afford it, I let him pay all or most as I earn next to nothing and 2-I DO love to have everything paid for every once in a while just as a reminder that I'm really worth it.
Still---it's the 21st Century and assuming she has a job, she can pay for at least part. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Can't you get a sense from the lady herself of how she would like to be treated? And take that into consideration along with what you want to do yourself?
Personally I fucking hate all that "treat her like a princess" bollocks and it would probably put a hasty end to a burgeoning relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Very true there isn't any hard and fast rules, I've no issues with fully paying for everything on the occasional night out, however like most people I have financial limits and don't want to limit our nights out to once or twice a month. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it depends on the woman you're with. Talk to her about it.
When I was first dating Marc he would pay for dinner and stuff. He had a job and I was a lowly student. The longer we were together the more we shared the costs for things, though. It worked for us and he wouldn't have let me pay anyway. But each person and relationship is different. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Manners & respect, but don't be taken for a mug.
As said previously ,treat them the way you would like to be treated yourself, a lot to be said about being a gentleman.
Good luck  |
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My partner asked me. He told me how many times he could afford to take us out and then asked what I'd like to do - go halves, in which case we could go out more, or allow him to pay in which case we'd be limited.
Seemed reasonable to me. Now we're a couple it's more free and easy. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Have you asked her how she feels?"
Not yet, although from every bodies feedback, its a question I will be asking just working on a positive slant for the topic, so I don't appear negative when asking |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Manners & respect, but don't be taken for a mug.
As said previously ,treat them the way you would like to be treated yourself, a lot to be said about being a gentleman.
Good luck "
And its being taken for a mug is in the back of my mind. As I have my financial and family (daughter) commitments too. |
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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago
in the eye of the storm |
"just be you....how do you want to treat her"
I have to agree with this op . are you really so new to dating that you need advice from a bunch of fuck dating that cost money cant we just fuck in the cheapest way possible swingers .
do as you feel comfortable with op if she doesn't like it she will piss off and date someone else which is the correct way of being because for dating to work you have to be yourself not what you think someone thinks you should be . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"just be you....how do you want to treat her"
I'll probably will end up treating her more than not, however I'm just don't want to put myself in position where every time we go out, she's expecting me to pay for everything, which is what a close girl friend, whose an ex says I should be doing as that's what she expects from your current partner and gets. |
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By *erminxWoman
over a year ago
Quinton |
I'm a funny mix of traditional and independent, for example on if we have met for the first time I will probably pay for first drinks, if it's not working out I can walk away with a clear conscience
If the guy offers to pay he gets brownie points, but I'll pay the next time (or if a second is unlikely offer to split the first)
I think the offer is gentlemanly, what the girl then does with that will speak volumes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I was dating someone and they asked how I felt about them paying for a meal i'd probably laugh and tell them to fuck off....i would let you pay for the meal but buy my fair share of drinks and I would pay for the next meal....it's nice to be nice but it's 2016 x |
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