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Should i Change!!
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By *acktilMan
over a year ago
Tewkesbury |
"Tell me please! should i stop being a gentleman when i write to ladies on here? Q  "
Never stop being a gentleman, I was raised old school, respect your elders, respect ladies, infact respect everyone. Always put ladies first, endevour to fulfill there every wish and desire. However, do not become a doormat.
I've been on here for a little over 2yrs now, in that time I have never sent a one line message or an un-requested cock pic.
Be yourself if you were raised to be respectful and polite just carry on, if it's an act you will be found out.
Happy swinging  |
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if you arent yourself your just being dishonest to youself and to others.
far too much work trying to be what your not and thats why so meny slip up and show their true colours . just be you hun! least you know people like you for exactly who you are then x
btw loving your status and profile |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tell me please! should i stop being a gentleman when i write to ladies on here? Q
Does it get you anywhere acting like a gent?"
it's wonderful to encounter a real gentleman. makes a woman feel real good. I especilly like gentlemen with no underwear so I can feel really good.  |
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"Tell me please! should i stop being a gentleman when i write to ladies on here? Q "
definatley not Gentlemen are few and far between on here is nice to know for some men that nice we touch is still there women adore to be treated like a lady by a nice gentleman .  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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yes.
being nice to people just leaves you on the subs bench and as you know, the best players like to get the boots on and play the game.
you only have to be in chat to see all the male bashing that goes on.
the fact is women like someone to be a little rough around the edges and if this wasnt true then why do good guys finish last and you see all the male bashing going on.
when you see complaints about single guys being pushy the fact is its an attention game.
like newly born birds in the nest if you do not shout loud enough you will not be heared or fed.
if your honest,polite and respectful you get nothing.
be a wanker,2 timing piece of shit and you'll be fighting them off left,right and center.
and girls. dont start posting that im some wankers for saying how it really is.
ive been there and seen it happening for years.
good guys finish last.
fact. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"yes.
being nice to people just leaves you on the subs bench and as you know, the best players like to get the boots on and play the game.
you only have to be in chat to see all the male bashing that goes on.
the fact is women like someone to be a little rough around the edges and if this wasnt true then why do good guys finish last and you see all the male bashing going on.
when you see complaints about single guys being pushy the fact is its an attention game.
like newly born birds in the nest if you do not shout loud enough you will not be heared or fed.
if your honest,polite and respectful you get nothing.
be a wanker,2 timing piece of shit and you'll be fighting them off left,right and center.
and girls. dont start posting that im some wankers for saying how it really is.
ive been there and seen it happening for years.
good guys finish last.
fact."
a gentleman who is a little rough around the edges ... mmm even better. |
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"yes.
being nice to people just leaves you on the subs bench and as you know, the best players like to get the boots on and play the game.
you only have to be in chat to see all the male bashing that goes on.
the fact is women like someone to be a little rough around the edges and if this wasnt true then why do good guys finish last and you see all the male bashing going on.
when you see complaints about single guys being pushy the fact is its an attention game.
like newly born birds in the nest if you do not shout loud enough you will not be heared or fed.
if your honest,polite and respectful you get nothing.
be a wanker,2 timing piece of shit and you'll be fighting them off left,right and center.
and girls. dont start posting that im some wankers for saying how it really is.
ive been there and seen it happening for years.
good guys finish last.
fact."
well definatley true in this girls case give me a gent any day my saying is a Gentleman is a very patient wolf waiting to be released when the time is right .  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"yes.
being nice to people just leaves you on the subs bench and as you know, the best players like to get the boots on and play the game.
you only have to be in chat to see all the male bashing that goes on.
the fact is women like someone to be a little rough around the edges and if this wasnt true then why do good guys finish last and you see all the male bashing going on.
when you see complaints about single guys being pushy the fact is its an attention game.
like newly born birds in the nest if you do not shout loud enough you will not be heared or fed.
if your honest,polite and respectful you get nothing.
be a wanker,2 timing piece of shit and you'll be fighting them off left,right and center.
and girls. dont start posting that im some wankers for saying how it really is.
ive been there and seen it happening for years.
good guys finish last.
fact.
well definatley true in this girls case give me a gent any day my saying is a Gentleman is a very patient wolf waiting to be released when the time is right . "
aren't they just, but shhhhhhhhhhh don't tell everyone, there's not that many to go round. |
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errm no the two timing peices of shite ended very quickly as ex boyfriends .the nicest ,most honest and respect guy i knew,i ended up married to for coming up to 13 years now . so nice guys dont finnish last .just a feeble excuse some guys use to try and be macho |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"errm no the two timing peices of shite ended very quickly as ex boyfriends .the nicest ,most honest and respect guy i knew,i ended up married to for coming up to 13 years now . so nice guys dont finnish last .just a feeble excuse some guys use to try and be macho "
I like a long stayer. |
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"yes.
being nice to people just leaves you on the subs bench and as you know, the best players like to get the boots on and play the game.
you only have to be in chat to see all the male bashing that goes on.
the fact is women like someone to be a little rough around the edges and if this wasnt true then why do good guys finish last and you see all the male bashing going on.
when you see complaints about single guys being pushy the fact is its an attention game.
like newly born birds in the nest if you do not shout loud enough you will not be heared or fed.
if your honest,polite and respectful you get nothing.
be a wanker,2 timing piece of shit and you'll be fighting them off left,right and center.
and girls. dont start posting that im some wankers for saying how it really is.
ive been there and seen it happening for years.
good guys finish last.
fact."
Ahhh the nice guys finish last meme.Last bastion of entitlement and male privilege. 
OP look at the men you know with successful relationships,who are content.Are they twunts? Abusive? Or happy in their own skin and with who they are?
Be yourself,anything else doesn't work in the long run. |
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"out the woodwork you all come.
god im good at this "
No your not,as trolls go u barely get a look in, but now all the women who read the forum will know who they don't want to meet...still think it was a wise post? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"out the woodwork you all come.
god im good at this
No your not,as trolls go u barely get a look in, but now all the women who read the forum will know who they don't want to meet...still think it was a wise post?"
couldnt careless anymore.
i say it as i see it. dont like it well ok. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"yes.
being nice to people just leaves you on the subs bench and as you know, the best players like to get the boots on and play the game.
you only have to be in chat to see all the male bashing that goes on.
the fact is women like someone to be a little rough around the edges and if this wasnt true then why do good guys finish last and you see all the male bashing going on.
when you see complaints about single guys being pushy the fact is its an attention game.
like newly born birds in the nest if you do not shout loud enough you will not be heared or fed.
if your honest,polite and respectful you get nothing.
be a wanker,2 timing piece of shit and you'll be fighting them off left,right and center.
and girls. dont start posting that im some wankers for saying how it really is.
ive been there and seen it happening for years.
good guys finish last.
fact."
I know you're going to get pissy about this but, sometimes, you do talk some bubbles. Any bloke that messes me around gets the boot straight off, in the vanilla world or on here. And I know I'm not the only one! You've had some crappy experiences by the sound of it but not all women behave that way. |
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"out the woodwork you all come.
god im good at this
No your not,as trolls go u barely get a look in, but now all the women who read the forum will know who they don't want to meet...still think it was a wise post?
couldnt careless anymore.
i say it as i see it. dont like it well ok."
oh well, if you dont care about getting meets,good on you for being brave,on a swinging site most people do.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would think it would be pretty difficult not to be yourself anyway, guess it would work for short term but i would soon forget who i was supposed to be and revert back to myself"
I met a man who I'd been talking to for a while. He came across as a real gentleman: he impressed (fooled?) me.
When we met he walked in front of me into the pub and didn't hold the door open. He walked straight to the bar and ordered himself a drink. When I pulled him up on it he was generally surprised and said "this isn't a date!" at which point I left.
You can pretend to be something you're not for a while, but truth will out! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think you need to be in the middle personaly. If you act like parider38 has said you run the risk of antagonising people but if your to nice then your run the risk of boring em as well!
I'm not trying to make out I'm Don one and can pull anyone. I just think from experience, reading the forums and talking to people that if your to polite woman find you boring!
It's easy to put in the posts the gentlemen will always shine through but to some extent Parider38 is right because read most profiles or talk to a lot of women and they like a cheeky fella.
I think it's one of those threads were it's open to interpretation! In my opinion you can be to much of a gentlemen ie. not being cheeky in fear of insulting someone. Which on a swinging site I think a lot of women, if truly honest, will find boring!
That said I'm not saying you disrespect people or don't be polite. That's just rude!
Come on ladies. Be honest! You all like a cheeky chappy as long as he's not arrogane, pushy or disrespectful. |
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"yes.
being nice to people just leaves you on the subs bench and as you know, the best players like to get the boots on and play the game.
you only have to be in chat to see all the male bashing that goes on.
the fact is women like someone to be a little rough around the edges and if this wasnt true then why do good guys finish last and you see all the male bashing going on.
when you see complaints about single guys being pushy the fact is its an attention game.
like newly born birds in the nest if you do not shout loud enough you will not be heared or fed.
if your honest,polite and respectful you get nothing.
be a wanker,2 timing piece of shit and you'll be fighting them off left,right and center.
and girls. dont start posting that im some wankers for saying how it really is.
ive been there and seen it happening for years.
good guys finish last.
fact."
Yet again you manage to come out with a load of old bollocks. Yes when i was young id go for the bad boys. But i can assure you ive not let one person piss me about since before i got married.
I saw a guy tonight who i have known many a year. I recommended this site to him and he did exactly what i expected. He came on, he got meets and repeat meets. I knew this would happen why? Because hes a bloody decent guy, doesnt mess people about and he is respectful. There is noway i would even begin to entertain a guy that wasnt decent and respectful.
And whoever said good guys are boring, again aload of bollocks. Anyone and everyone has the potential to be boring. Just cause someone is a gentleman doesnt mean hes not going to be a shit hot dirty bastard in bed.
Decent guys can also be cheeky and a damn good laugh its not strictly for the bad guys club
All i see from some of the guys on this thread is bitterness. Maybe someone has "stolen" their girl of them at some stage or they where "passed over"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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""yes.
being nice to people just leaves you on the subs bench and as you know, the best players like to get the boots on and play the game.
you only have to be in chat to see all the male bashing that goes on.
the fact is women like someone to be a little rough around the edges and if this wasnt true then why do good guys finish last and you see all the male bashing going on.
when you see complaints about single guys being pushy the fact is its an attention game.
like newly born birds in the nest if you do not shout loud enough you will not be heared or fed.
if your honest,polite and respectful you get nothing.
be a wanker,2 timing piece of shit and you'll be fighting them off left,right and center.
and girls. dont start posting that im some wankers for saying how it really is.
ive been there and seen it happening for years.
good guys finish last.
fact."
Yet again you manage to come out with a load of old bollocks. Yes when i was young id go for the bad boys. But i can assure you ive not let one person piss me about since before i got married.
I saw a guy tonight who i have known many a year. I recommended this site to him and he did exactly what i expected. He came on, he got meets and repeat meets. I knew this would happen why? Because hes a bloody decent guy, doesnt mess people about and he is respectful. There is noway i would even begin to entertain a guy that wasnt decent and respectful.
And whoever said good guys are boring, again aload of bollocks. Anyone and everyone has the potential to be boring. Just cause someone is a gentleman doesnt mean hes not going to be a shit hot dirty bastard in bed.
Decent guys can also be cheeky and a damn good laugh its not strictly for the bad guys club
All i see from some of the guys on this thread is bitterness. Maybe someone has "stolen" their girl of them at some stage or they where "passed over"
"
*Standing ovation for Diamond*
Couldn't have put it better myself! My other half is the kindest, nicest, shy man I've ever met, but dirty and kinky as hell to attract and keep my attention for three years!
Only bitter, low self esteem men with chips on their shoulders believe being a "bad boy" will truly get them laid! All I can say is good luck with that! |
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Well i'm totally lost now! as my question kinda got lost in amongst other links!! but i'd like to thank you all for your advice and i'm gonna just be me and stay on "the subs bench" for now & be patient. Thanks to all. S boy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You have to be yourself and not try to be something you're not. A lot of people come on here and reinvent themselves in order to make themselves sound more interesting.
I enjoy the posts on here from the forum imitators - a group of people who see a particular forum member who is interesting to them and they will try and impersonate that style. They see a witty and funny guy on here who appears popular and they will imitate that humour and those ideas and it never quite works. I also enjoy the ones where they constantly go on about how professional they are, how important their job is, how they only wear expensive clothes, yet their forum posts and the language they use suggests a different background to the one they are so desperately trying to convey.
Just be who you are. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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""
And whoever said good guys are boring, again aload of bollocks. Anyone and everyone has the potential to be boring. Just cause someone is a gentleman doesnt mean hes not going to be a shit hot dirty bastard in bed.
Decent guys can also be cheeky and a damn good laugh its not strictly for the bad guys club
All i see from some of the guys on this thread is bitterness. Maybe someone has "stolen" their girl of them at some stage or they where "passed over"
"
I didn't say good guy's are boring. You've taken what I said out of context. And of course good guy's can be cheeky I didn't say otherwise and people who are arrogant and lack manners obviously aren't going to get anywhere on the site. Not with many people anyway.
My point is women and couples have a lot of choice on here. I know I used to be on here as a couple. So my _iews don't come from any bitterness. Sometimes we were just looking for meets and weren't bothered about the friendship side.
If we found someone un attractive we wouldn't invite them! Simple
If we found someone boring we wouldn't invite them! Again simple!
The point about being boring didn't imply that good guy's are boring. I was implying that some people would tend to be a bit boring with their messages and lacked a bit of charisma! The messages were very polite but had no banter in them!
No doubt the people sending the message were nice people. But because we weren't looking for endless chat's to peel away the outer layers to get to the funny, cheeky person underneath who we maybe or could have found funny we chose to ignore them!
I know what I'm trying to get across but not sure If I'm wording it correctly.
Be a genuine, considerate and polite guy and of course you'll get meets! Be arrogant and you won't
In my opinion you can be overly polite!ie you start to overly censor your messages for fear of insulting someone. Incase they don't like your personality! The result ends up in a boring message with no character! Just be yourself!
There I think I finaly got to the point I was trying to make
After all that I managed it in one paragraph pmsl  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Definitely a big difference between cheeky and giving banter vs rudeness and being disrespectful. Pro, you're totally right - the first ones is a great thing and I'd class them as the good guys. The latter gets you a nice big ignore and them's the bad boys who behave like arrogant areses |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"no def dont change as not many men like you aboput these days, most of the guys on site think that on a first meeet they can jump down your knickers "
And I wouldn't class that as being polite. I'd class that as being rude and disrespectful!
I suppose thats the other thing to watch out for. Some people will be nice as pie in their messages to get their foot in the door but once there the real truth shines through that their only after one thing and don't give a fuck if you enjoy it 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Should you stop being a gentleman??
Short answer ta that is No
Be true ta yaself hold ya values and dont try ta run wi the rest
You will be noticed fa being different eventually xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Definitely a big difference between cheeky and giving banter vs rudeness and being disrespectful. Pro, you're totally right - the first ones is a great thing and I'd class them as the good guys. The latter gets you a nice big ignore and them's the bad boys who behave like arrogant areses "
They're usually the ones who send abusive messages when you say no as well! We had one guy who after a couple of messages replied to one of our questions and his reply seemed stroppy.
My ex and I didn't like the sound of it so messaged him back, politely, explaining that his answer sounded stroppy so we weren't going to invite him around.
He then messaged back with loads of verbal abuse
Bothered? Nope Blocked and reported? Yup
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
"no def dont change as not many men like you aboput these days, most of the guys on site think that on a first meeet they can jump down your knickers "
I should bloody hope so too!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you Iconic "
Thats Ok, I like gentlemen. Im not keen on the rushing to open doors and pulling chairs out and taking my coat (though I do like a coat thrown over a puddle, dont want to ruin my shoes do I). But I do like respectfulness, really not keen on guys who use course language or dont listen to what im saying and assume they know whats best for me sexually - usually the things they like doing.
So gentlemen all the way for me - shame about the distance and the not meeting couples really |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you Iconic
Thats Ok, I like gentlemen. Im not keen on the rushing to open doors and pulling chairs out and taking my coat (though I do like a coat thrown over a puddle, dont want to ruin my shoes do I). But I do like respectfulness, really not keen on guys who use course language or dont listen to what im saying and assume they know whats best for me sexually - usually the things they like doing.
So gentlemen all the way for me - shame about the distance and the not meeting couples really "
depends which course it is, the language we use in my yoga and dance classes is perfectly acceptable. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
depends which course it is, the language we use in my yoga and dance classes is perfectly acceptable."
Lol - course is one word that I always spell incorrectly, I know its coarse but I never spell it that way. Its a good job I don't use it very often, apart from here |
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I had a guy message me the other week with what i would describe as a crude message. Usually i ignore but i wasnt doing anything so i messaged him back and said i wish you luck on this site cause with an attitude like that your going to need it. He messaged me back and said when your as good in bed as me you dont need luck. He had been on the site 9 months with no verifications or a verified profile. I rest my case |
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