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Dating disasters?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm a genuine single guy age 45. Have been using pof on and off for a while.
My worst vanilla date, she turned up d*unk and driving her car, drank a bottle of wine with our meal, fell over leaving the pub, offered me a lift home?
I got a taxi.
What's your worst first date? |
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"I'm a genuine single guy age 45. Have been using pof on and off for a while.
My worst vanilla date, she turned up d*unk and driving her car, drank a bottle of wine with our meal, fell over leaving the pub, offered me a lift home?
I got a taxi.
What's your worst first date?"
So you didn't do the gentlemanly thing and throw her car key miles away and get her a cab??  |
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By *horltzMan
over a year ago
heysham |
I had a date many moons ago , she turned up late , dilated pupils and she ended up getting arrested for criminal damage , wasn't what I had hoped for but the entertainment level was second to non |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I had a date many moons ago , she turned up late , dilated pupils and she ended up getting arrested for criminal damage , wasn't what I had hoped for but the entertainment level was second to non"
At least it's not just me? Mine didn't get arrested  |
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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago
hiding from cock pics. |
I had a date where the guy took me for one of my favourite things, a massive ice cream. We sat upstairs overlooking the sea right at the window.... everything was lovely.
After delicately finishing my ice cream I managed to fall the whole way, sitcom style down the flight of stairs....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had a date many moons ago , she turned up late , dilated pupils and she ended up getting arrested for criminal damage , wasn't what I had hoped for but the entertainment level was second to non"
Meets like that can be so funny! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I had a date where the guy took me for one of my favourite things, a massive ice cream. We sat upstairs overlooking the sea right at the window.... everything was lovely.
After delicately finishing my ice cream I managed to fall the whole way, sitcom style down the flight of stairs....
"
We're you ok? Did you get a second date? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
My worst vanilla date, she turned up d*unk and driving her car, drank a bottle of wine with our meal, fell over leaving the pub, offered me a lift home?
Think I know her  "
Much of that sounds like me but what's a date? |
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I had meet once turn up d*unk at mine met him before social meet though ok he d*unk falling asleep try pinch my door keys told him go but good job I had friends on here son block report no need of it..mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a date with a guy that was the polar opposite of me (strange given we got on so well over email) he bought the first round so I offered to buy the second even though it was clear it wasn't going too well but I felt I should... he told me (much to my relief) he had to go home and do his ironing!!!  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
My worst vanilla date, she turned up d*unk and driving her car, drank a bottle of wine with our meal, fell over leaving the pub, offered me a lift home?
Think I know her
Much of that sounds like me but what's a date? "
Pm me and I will take you on a date |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I met a guy off pof and he was just really rude..wasn't listening to me when I was talking, making derogatory comments about other ladies in the pub...then as we walked outside he slapped my ass out of nowhere!
Another time I drove a fair way to meet a guy halfway between where we lived..he should have left home same time as I did but when I text him to see where he was he was still in bed! He said oh I'll get up now and come. WHEN he arrived he clearly hadn't bothered to shower or make any kind of effort. .he stank! and then tried to kiss me! I text my friend to ring me with a pretend emergency so I could leave!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had a date with a guy that was the polar opposite of me (strange given we got on so well over email) he bought the first round so I offered to buy the second even though it was clear it wasn't going too well but I felt I should... he told me (much to my relief) he had to go home and do his ironing!!! "
I like his style, honesty is the best if not sometimes cutting policy |
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By *idan31Man
over a year ago
ashby |
I met a girl from pof for a coffee... when I walked in I looked around and couldn't see her. Then this woman that was sat down started waving at me.
She looked nothing like her profile pictures, it was quite embarrassing. Had a coffee, politely made my excuses and left. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
My worst vanilla date, she turned up d*unk and driving her car, drank a bottle of wine with our meal, fell over leaving the pub, offered me a lift home?
Think I know her
Much of that sounds like me but what's a date? "
It's what you go on when you are on a dating site .. that's what the op was on about anyway |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had a date with a guy that was the polar opposite of me (strange given we got on so well over email) he bought the first round so I offered to buy the second even though it was clear it wasn't going too well but I felt I should... he told me (much to my relief) he had to go home and do his ironing!!!
I like his style, honesty is the best if not sometimes cutting policy "
This is true.... I did feel like I was being filmed as part of the undatables! He sent me a very nice message afterwards telling me how to improve my profile which was also brilliant, he was a very sweet man  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had a date with a guy that was the polar opposite of me (strange given we got on so well over email) he bought the first round so I offered to buy the second even though it was clear it wasn't going too well but I felt I should... he told me (much to my relief) he had to go home and do his ironing!!!
I like his style, honesty is the best if not sometimes cutting policy
This is true.... I did feel like I was being filmed as part of the undatables! He sent me a very nice message afterwards telling me how to improve my profile which was also brilliant, he was a very sweet man "
Well, I think that was a bit much
My friends tell me I'm undateable.
I think they're just mean bastards myself, I can be quite charming when I want to be |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My list is endless for terrible first dates ( mostly form my pof days way back when) but at least they give me something to laugh about when our with the girls. My very first first date from pof still a winner. Lasted under a minute! |
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Well apart from the one where i met someone and actually went into shock. The going on a date with the wrong person
Ive been ok. I wonder if ive ever been anyones worst date. Cant remember doing anything really bad
But because i dont remember doesnt mean it didnt hppen |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The worst one - we were chatting about our respective work lives and he mentioned he used to be a doorman in bars and clubs. He mentioned that he once found a young lad taking in the toilets. Then proceeded to describe to me how he smashed the young man's face into the cistern, knocking his two front teeth out and had a good laugh as if sharing a hilarious anecdote. Seemed genuinely shocked that I wasn't laughing too.
Different guy - met up two towns away in the middle of winter. Had a nice evening and I thought it might lead to a second date. Upon getting ready to leave we realised it had started snowing torrentially. He was driving but left me to walk to the bus stop, didn't even offer a lift home, despite he fact he was going that way. When he messaged me the next day to organise the second date, I suggested it might have been gentlemanly to offer a lift given the weather, to which he replied 'it was a first date, I knew I wasn't going to get any'.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Had a really boring date with a guy and at the end he tries to go in for a kiss - had to practically do a ninja roll to get out of it
But on a positive note - that's where I met Mr A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The worst one - we were chatting about our respective work lives and he mentioned he used to be a doorman in bars and clubs. He mentioned that he once found a young lad taking in the toilets. Then proceeded to describe to me how he smashed the young man's face into the cistern, knocking his two front teeth out and had a good laugh as if sharing a hilarious anecdote. Seemed genuinely shocked that I wasn't laughing too.
Different guy - met up two towns away in the middle of winter. Had a nice evening and I thought it might lead to a second date. Upon getting ready to leave we realised it had started snowing torrentially. He was driving but left me to walk to the bus stop, didn't even offer a lift home, despite he fact he was going that way. When he messaged me the next day to organise the second date, I suggested it might have been gentlemanly to offer a lift given the weather, to which he replied 'it was a first date, I knew I wasn't going to get any'. "
What a wanker. Hope he's still not getting any! |
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"I had a date with a guy that was the polar opposite of me (strange given we got on so well over email) he bought the first round so I offered to buy the second even though it was clear it wasn't going too well but I felt I should... he told me (much to my relief) he had to go home and do his ironing!!!
I like his style, honesty is the best if not sometimes cutting policy
This is true.... I did feel like I was being filmed as part of the undatables! He sent me a very nice message afterwards telling me how to improve my profile which was also brilliant, he was a very sweet man
Well, I think that was a bit much
My friends tell me I'm undateable.
I think they're just mean bastards myself, I can be quite charming when I want to be "
i think youd make a lovely person to date |
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By *ilfy85Woman
over a year ago
Beckwithshaw |
I met a bloke from POF who took me to a bar and started throwing £20 notes around and insulting the bar staff because he could his exact words all because he was d*unk. He was nice on the phone too, this is why any first date I insist no alcohol and it be a coffee.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The worst one - we were chatting about our respective work lives and he mentioned he used to be a doorman in bars and clubs. He mentioned that he once found a young lad taking in the toilets. Then proceeded to describe to me how he smashed the young man's face into the cistern, knocking his two front teeth out and had a good laugh as if sharing a hilarious anecdote. Seemed genuinely shocked that I wasn't laughing too.
Different guy - met up two towns away in the middle of winter. Had a nice evening and I thought it might lead to a second date. Upon getting ready to leave we realised it had started snowing torrentially. He was driving but left me to walk to the bus stop, didn't even offer a lift home, despite he fact he was going that way. When he messaged me the next day to organise the second date, I suggested it might have been gentlemanly to offer a lift given the weather, to which he replied 'it was a first date, I knew I wasn't going to get any'.
What a wanker. Hope he's still not getting any! "
Yep the term selfish prick sprang to mind! |
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By *idan31Man
over a year ago
ashby |
"I could write a book but one springs to mind that I gave him some money to go to the bar to get us a drink while I go to the toilet...he legged it with the money "
Sorry .. I just laughed out loud at that !!  |
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"I could write a book but one springs to mind that I gave him some money to go to the bar to get us a drink while I go to the toilet...he legged it with the money
Sorry .. I just laughed out loud at that !! "
You can laugh |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I could write a book but one springs to mind that I gave him some money to go to the bar to get us a drink while I go to the toilet...he legged it with the money
Sorry .. I just laughed out loud at that !!
You can laugh "
Sorry but that's hilarious what a clown |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's been that long I've forgotten what a date is 
*hopes somebody shows some sympathy and offers to let me wine and dine them*  "
Nope. I'm too independent for that |
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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago
Bristol |
I have never been on a traditional date but I did once go to a gig with a guy I'd just started seeing to meet his friends for the first time (including his ex), got boxed in on the way by taking a wrong shortcut, climbed over an iron fence rather than walk round and managed to rip my top totally open on the dismount when it got caught on a spike at the top of the fence. I had to wear my jacket done up all that night. And it was a new top |
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By *eesideMan
over a year ago
margate sumwear by the sea |
"I'm a genuine single guy age 45. Have been using pof on and off for a while.
My worst vanilla date, she turned up d*unk and driving her car, drank a bottle of wine with our meal, fell over leaving the pub, offered me a lift home?
I got a taxi.
What's your worst first date?"
Like on fab with no meets yet I've not had a date ever. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My friends used to set me up on blind dates.
Never ever again!"
Haha a few of my friends said they were going to go on that date my friend site and put me on it. I made it clear that it wasn't to happen! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"My friends used to set me up on blind dates.
Never ever again!
Haha a few of my friends said they were going to go on that date my friend site and put me on it. I made it clear that it wasn't to happen!"
Haha from what I've read from yourself that would be a bad idea...sounds like you don't take no s**t |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's been that long I've forgotten what a date is
*hopes somebody shows some sympathy and offers to let me wine and dine them*
Nope. I'm too independent for that "
Nothing wrong with letting your guard down for a night I mean come on what's the worst that could happen...you may actually enjoy my company a little bit  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My friends used to set me up on blind dates.
Never ever again!
Haha a few of my friends said they were going to go on that date my friend site and put me on it. I made it clear that it wasn't to happen!
Haha from what I've read from yourself that would be a bad idea...sounds like you don't take no s**t "
No that's just the accent  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My friends used to set me up on blind dates.
Never ever again!
Haha a few of my friends said they were going to go on that date my friend site and put me on it. I made it clear that it wasn't to happen!
Haha from what I've read from yourself that would be a bad idea...sounds like you don't take no s**t
No that's just the accent "
Which midlands accent is that? Please don't say your a yam yam |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My friends used to set me up on blind dates.
Never ever again!
Haha a few of my friends said they were going to go on that date my friend site and put me on it. I made it clear that it wasn't to happen!
Haha from what I've read from yourself that would be a bad idea...sounds like you don't take no s**t
No that's just the accent
Which midlands accent is that? Please don't say your a yam yam "
No I've never picked the accent up, still have my accent I brought with me, one from Colchester |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My friends used to set me up on blind dates.
Never ever again!
Your brave for even considering
I'm not one to say no "
Is that depending on the offer though  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My friends used to set me up on blind dates.
Never ever again!
Haha a few of my friends said they were going to go on that date my friend site and put me on it. I made it clear that it wasn't to happen!
Haha from what I've read from yourself that would be a bad idea...sounds like you don't take no s**t
No that's just the accent
Which midlands accent is that? Please don't say your a yam yam
No I've never picked the accent up, still have my accent I brought with me, one from Colchester "
I just wiped my forrid with relief...not that I'm assuming I'll ever get to hear that voice from the other side of a restaurant table or anything like that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My worst date ever was with this girl from pof, came to pick her up and her mum stuck her head in my window and gave me a long warning about her safety, then the girl told me at least 4 stories about how people had recently been killed in car accidents or other ways throughout the date, but the worst part, when I knew i couldnt push through, her favourite movies...not saying their bad but favourite movies......
Jason statham movies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My worst date ever was with this girl from pof, came to pick her up and her mum stuck her head in my window and gave me a long warning about her safety, then the girl told me at least 4 stories about how people had recently been killed in car accidents or other ways throughout the date, but the worst part, when I knew i couldnt push through, her favourite movies...not saying their bad but favourite movies......
Jason statham movies "
I take it back they are bad, theyre all so lame im ready to debate this |
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By *ilacWoman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
First date was hiking.. sounded quite a cute idea. Total awkward silences and us just power walking round a hill. We went to a cafe and I walked in, fell over a Labrador and knocked a vase off the counter and it smashed. More awkward silence while we drank tea. Then I went to the toilet and got locked inside. Had to phone him to come with staff and release me.
He didn't want a second date. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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He was about 20 years older than he had said on the dating site, dressed very oddly and I sat drinking coffee looking around as he talked about his ex for 20 minutes. Then he asked if he could see me again.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He was about 20 years older than he had said on the dating site, dressed very oddly and I sat drinking coffee looking around as he talked about his ex for 20 minutes. Then he asked if he could see me again. "
So did the second date go any better |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"First date was hiking.. sounded quite a cute idea. Total awkward silences and us just power walking round a hill. We went to a cafe and I walked in, fell over a Labrador and knocked a vase off the counter and it smashed. More awkward silence while we drank tea. Then I went to the toilet and got locked inside. Had to phone him to come with staff and release me.
He didn't want a second date. "
That's epic that is you couldn't make that up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He was about 20 years older than he had said on the dating site, dressed very oddly and I sat drinking coffee looking around as he talked about his ex for 20 minutes. Then he asked if he could see me again.
So did the second date go any better "
Surprisingly I was never available. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"My friends used to set me up on blind dates.
Never ever again!
Haha a few of my friends said they were going to go on that date my friend site and put me on it. I made it clear that it wasn't to happen!
Haha from what I've read from yourself that would be a bad idea...sounds like you don't take no s**t
No that's just the accent
Which midlands accent is that? Please don't say your a yam yam
No I've never picked the accent up, still have my accent I brought with me, one from Colchester
I just wiped my forrid with relief...not that I'm assuming I'll ever get to hear that voice from the other side of a restaurant table or anything like that "
I'm telling you now, that program "the undateables" is more suited for me
You never know you might get to chat across the bar at chams one day. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I haven't dated much, but in college a guy from the track team asked me out. The whole time he could only talk about his buddies on the track team and their poker nights along with how Ann Coulter was his hero. 
He took me to a really unromatic movie (Letters from Iwo Jima) and bought me dinner from a pizza place in the mall food court. It wasn't particularly date-like... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"He was about 20 years older than he had said on the dating site, dressed very oddly and I sat drinking coffee looking around as he talked about his ex for 20 minutes. Then he asked if he could see me again.
So did the second date go any better
Surprisingly I was never available. "
Now why doesn't that surprise me  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"My friends used to set me up on blind dates.
Never ever again!
Haha a few of my friends said they were going to go on that date my friend site and put me on it. I made it clear that it wasn't to happen!
Haha from what I've read from yourself that would be a bad idea...sounds like you don't take no s**t
No that's just the accent
Which midlands accent is that? Please don't say your a yam yam
No I've never picked the accent up, still have my accent I brought with me, one from Colchester
I just wiped my forrid with relief...not that I'm assuming I'll ever get to hear that voice from the other side of a restaurant table or anything like that
I'm telling you now, that program "the undateables" is more suited for me
You never know you might get to chat across the bar at chams one day."
I've actually never watched it lol, hey the bar at chams is a start though, we all gotta start somewhere after all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"My friends used to set me up on blind dates.
Never ever again!
Your brave for even considering
I'm not one to say no
Is that depending on the offer though
I've learned from my mistakes "
Haha I wish I could say the same |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Got talking to a girl on pof, everything was great, lots of messaging, phone calls and first date was the best date I'd been on, until we got back to her flat. So much stuff behind the door you had to squeeze through whatever gap you could make. Walk down the hallway concentrating so haRd on not falling over that you walk into walls. Then sit yourself down on the edge of a chair (because it is already occupied by boxes of junk) while she makes you a drink. To be safe I chose a bottle of water from the fridge, then made my excuses and left. |
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"My friends used to set me up on blind dates.
Never ever again!"
Ours was an asked for blind date ive had 2 of them as both our friends knew we was looking for someone.
The second one we have a wonderful loverly daughter |
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My first girlfriend from school. We went to Alton towers with school trip and ended up on the roller coaster. When we got off we sneaked off for a kiss only for her to puke just as we kissed. I can laugh about it now. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a date a few years back with a guy who seemed pretty perfect until he told me in detail about his trip to the go go bars in Thailand with his chums, after that I tried to excuse myself in a polite but obvious way so he knew I was far from impressed and he proceeded to argue with me how I had no right to take offence  |
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"I met a girl from pof for a coffee... when I walked in I looked around and couldn't see her. Then this woman that was sat down started waving at me.
She looked nothing like her profile pictures, it was quite embarrassing. Had a coffee, politely made my excuses and left. "
Something similiar happened to me.....she ( date from pof) was 10 years younger in her pics.
Had coffee, chat and left and 30 mins... |
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Years ago me and my best mate took two sisters to Blackpool pleasure beach went on a spinny ride in separate carriages. When we got of my friends date was looking disgusted and upset. He had been sick all over her and she rang parents up to collect them both. |
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By *adyDangerWoman
over a year ago
land of debauchery and kink |
"I had a date a few years back with a guy who seemed pretty perfect until he told me in detail about his trip to the go go bars in Thailand with his chums, after that I tried to excuse myself in a polite but obvious way so he knew I was far from impressed and he proceeded to argue with me how I had no right to take offence "
Just curious why you did take offence? Loads do it when in Thailand I assume |
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"There's not enough hours in the day to list even just a few of mine.
So much so, I have now began to think it actually must be me?! "
It ain't you mate. Its very likely that any attractive woman who isn't attached is a head case. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There's not enough hours in the day to list even just a few of mine.
So much so, I have now began to think it actually must be me?!
It ain't you mate. Its very likely that any attractive woman who isn't attached is a head case."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There's not enough hours in the day to list even just a few of mine.
So much so, I have now began to think it actually must be me?!
It ain't you mate. Its very likely that any attractive woman who isn't attached is a head case."
Haha really? |
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Most of my dates off POF were crap.
One was younger than me, no job, couldn't drive, no hobbies, nothing to talk about, just kept saying "ahh you're sooo nice" and that was about it.
Another where I got to the pub and text to say I was there and he said "oh I'll leave home now" then when he got there looked me up and down in disgust and said "you look nothing like your pictures".
The worst though was when I drove 20 miles to a dive of a pub (his choice) 2 mins from his house. He again only left his house once I asked where he was. Bought himself a drink as I already had one, spent 30 mins moaning about work then when I said I best get going he said "yeh I'm gonna see if anyone's about who I know".. no goodbye or nice to meet you, he just walked off leaving me stood there like |
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"There's not enough hours in the day to list even just a few of mine.
So much so, I have now began to think it actually must be me?!
It ain't you mate. Its very likely that any attractive woman who isn't attached is a head case."
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
A guy picked me up for a date. He went to get petrol. Took me me back home coz he said he had to go pick up a mate. Last I heard of him
I haven't dated for a while. Im not quite dating material |
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By *idan31Man
over a year ago
ashby |
"Most of my dates off POF were crap.
One was younger than me, no job, couldn't drive, no hobbies, nothing to talk about, just kept saying "ahh you're sooo nice" and that was about it.
Another where I got to the pub and text to say I was there and he said "oh I'll leave home now" then when he got there looked me up and down in disgust and said "you look nothing like your pictures".
The worst though was when I drove 20 miles to a dive of a pub (his choice) 2 mins from his house. He again only left his house once I asked where he was. Bought himself a drink as I already had one, spent 30 mins moaning about work then when I said I best get going he said "yeh I'm gonna see if anyone's about who I know".. no goodbye or nice to meet you, he just walked off leaving me stood there like "
Was he blind, mad or stupid? Or a mixture of all three? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
What a great thread ... lovely to remember some disaster dates and realise the "not alone pack" is here...
I usually have lovely dates (and not a head case as suggested above if a woman is single/widowed/divorced and chooses to be so etc)
- had one or two not grand dates
He turned up in his JAG,
door open kind of guy,
suited -
off to cocktail bar before dinner -
so tick tick tick ......
then over two cocktails and twenty minutes......
....... he proceeded to tell me about his two divorces and started crying ...
as he missed his last wife .....
not the one tear I'm brave type of tear BTW -
the OMG he needs tissues STAT type
another bad date .....
Policeman pulls me over for breath test
Asks for my number as well
Takes me for drinks
Pizza at night at the beach
I had never had a one night stand ... 32 years old so I went with it .....(good catholic girl upbringing)
So about to have "the first one night stand shag" which I wasn't prepared for - he said - he didn't have any condoms... so I said "NOT HAPPENING THEN"
He said his mate has some - WTF - WHO?
He has a mate living with him - goes to mates room... trips over gym equipment ... walks back in ... turns off light.... very quick play .... makes noise like scrunching condom packet
TWO STROKE WONDER ......grrrrr
WTF - NO CONDOM - he couldn't find any so he pretended - thus Man of the LAW..... and wanted a second date - FLIP!
Anyway - most are lovely gentleman
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I don't think him laughing his head off and telling me in graphic detail about him and his friends gang banging a poverty stricken girl for money is considering wooing ... Call be old fashioned... I prefer men who have some respect for women |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What a great thread ... lovely to remember some disaster dates and realise the "not alone pack" is here...
I usually have lovely dates (and not a head case as suggested above if a woman is single/widowed/divorced and chooses to be so etc)
- had one or two not grand dates
He turned up in his JAG,
door open kind of guy,
suited -
off to cocktail bar before dinner -
so tick tick tick ......
then over two cocktails and twenty minutes......
....... he proceeded to tell me about his two divorces and started crying ...
as he missed his last wife .....
not the one tear I'm brave type of tear BTW -
the OMG he needs tissues STAT type
another bad date .....
Policeman pulls me over for breath test
Asks for my number as well
Takes me for drinks
Pizza at night at the beach
I had never had a one night stand ... 32 years old so I went with it .....(good catholic girl upbringing)
So about to have "the first one night stand shag" which I wasn't prepared for - he said - he didn't have any condoms... so I said "NOT HAPPENING THEN"
He said his mate has some - WTF - WHO?
He has a mate living with him - goes to mates room... trips over gym equipment ... walks back in ... turns off light.... very quick play .... makes noise like scrunching condom packet
TWO STROKE WONDER ......grrrrr
WTF - NO CONDOM - he couldn't find any so he pretended - thus Man of the LAW..... and wanted a second date - FLIP!
Anyway - most are lovely gentleman
"
Oh my days no wonder we have such a bad rep...I'd have left it at foreplay and oral and hoped to meet you again when I did have a condom |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's not enough hours in the day to list even just a few of mine.
So much so, I have now began to think it actually must be me?!
It ain't you mate. Its very likely that any attractive woman who isn't attached is a head case."
To be fair mate, it probably is me.
My sense of humour is quite dry and sarcastic, I like to be cheeky and piss take all the time. Not many women get it, especially on text where I don't litter my replies with a shit load of smiles or a ton of xxxxxxx's so people have no idea how to gauge my reply. It's probably my downfall but I'm not going to change and someone will get it eventually or not |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Also my mates don't help!
I've been threatened with an application for that "First Dates" show on Chanel 4
Just so they can publicly humiliate me with televised dating disasters just to top it off! |
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"My date cuming in his boxers after a fully clothed cuddle on the bed in premier inn after just 20 seconds! He bolted with embarrassment....
"
Haha that happened to me once at a party when I was at college. .... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A box of tampons exploded all over the floor in a restaurant (I'd knocked my bag off the chair and they tumbled all over the floor) to which all I could say is, "Yeah I'm still fertile!" "
Loool oh my god that's hilarious |
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