FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > When a guy sends a "polite" message
When a guy sends a "polite" message
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I'm coming across a few guys who think that because they aren't sending a fancy a fuk message and are polite, that I am going to meet them?
I get a lot of fancy a fuk type messages. But I get a lot of the polite ones too. It's not an automatic guarantee I will reply, let alone meet.
Weirdly the fancy a fuk guys seem to take rejection better than some of the "polite" ones?
I suspect if I met all the polite ones, they'd be some of the same guys who then would refuse to meet me because I've got too many veris. You can't win.
(NOTE: Not all polite guys and not all guys, it's just a trend that seems to be more common at the moment.) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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personally speaking I think a polite message is best,to simply message a total stranger and say fancy a fuck,just is,nt me
I at least try and message a polite way of saying it?? |
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Genuinely polite is fine. Loke I said this isn't aimed at all polite guys, just a few.
It's the "polite so I know I'm different to all the other guys so why won't you meet me?" that is happening quite a lot.
Which is basically someone telling me over and over that they are polite, when really they aren't.
To reiterate, guys are fabulous and I like them a lot. This is only a handful that are being like this. |
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I guess a lot of the "fancy a fuck" guys just shotgun out multiple messages , so get less pissed off if the get a no thanks; they are just waiting for the 1/100 "yes" or " maybe" responses .
Whereas some of the " polite" guys think that if the have spend a bit of time, then they are more entitled?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a nice polite guy. Fancy a fuck?
*I'm trying to hit somewhere in the middle with this one.
Fancy a fuck, please, maybe?"
ha ha ha love it bottleman ha ha
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh those polite guys can turn pretty quickly. I had one yesterday. Few nice messages. Pushed for a meet so I politely explained I'm not meeting off here but hoped he found what he was looking for. I then turned into aold, fat, sad, ugly slag. Strange cos up to then I was a goddess personified. With most if them it's just an act until they get what they want or you reject them. |
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By *reykiwi500Man
over a year ago
West Kent (near Tonbridge) |
"I guess a lot of the "fancy a fuck" guys just shotgun out multiple messages , so get less pissed off if the get a no thanks; they are just waiting for the 1/100 "yes" or " maybe" responses .
Whereas some of the " polite" guys think that if the have spend a bit of time, then they are more entitled?
"
I suspect you've hit the nail on the head. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You are one of the rare few who actually have a nice body (yes i know- its my opinion).
Even id love to have sex with you. If you fancy having sex some time lol.
Seriously i think that as you have good photo style along with a good body its not suprising you get messages from both types. Your photos seem quite inviting. Both in a polite and a naughty way. You aim at all sectors as it were lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I guess a lot of the "fancy a fuck" guys just shotgun out multiple messages , so get less pissed off if the get a no thanks; they are just waiting for the 1/100 "yes" or " maybe" responses .
Whereas some of the " polite" guys think that if the have spend a bit of time, then they are more entitled?
" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Had a msg from a 28 yr old at start of week. I deleted. He sent another 'fat c**t' to which I responded 'is that the best you can do?'. Another tirade of insults followed. Apparently he despises rude people who don't reply to polite msgs. His opener was ' hi, how are you?'. Had he read my profile first this could all have been avoided. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh those polite guys can turn pretty quickly. I had one yesterday. Few nice messages. Pushed for a meet so I politely explained I'm not meeting off here but hoped he found what he was looking for. I then turned into aold, fat, sad, ugly slag. Strange cos up to then I was a goddess personified. With most if them it's just an act until they get what they want or you reject them. "
that's not nice at all,he should of respected your statement and moved on,whats wrong with some people ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a nice polite guy. Fancy a fuck?
*I'm trying to hit somewhere in the middle with this one.
Fancy a fuck, please, maybe?"
I was waiting until my follow up message. I'm not playing all my cards on the first go.
Thank you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't understand why anyone wouldn't be polite here. I guess the ones who expect special treatment for displaying normal human behaviour are the ones who turn nasty. I'm even polite when long chats go nowhere or the lady sees a face pic and says no thanks. No point in being rude... shitting in someone else's sugar won't make yours any sweeter
P.S. wanna fuk? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men will send any old shit to get a meet, not all men, but some "
mmmm??? I'm not so sure there are some genuine gentlemen on here,and yes it would be nice to arrange a meet with someone you find attractive,but if you have a brain between your ears and they say no,then that's the end for most guys I hope xx |
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"Is this the thread where all of us guys rush on to say how *genuinely* lovely we all are and how we're different to all the other guys?
If so, hey I'm *genuinely* lovely and different to all the other guys "
lol how can you be genuinely lovely AND different to all the other guys?
It's like that thing where there's a superhero and lots of evil clones pretending to be him. How can we find the real one?!
Umm umm a genuinely lovely guy will have a place in Geneva? Wait, that was done yesterday. Is it something about heffalumps or other mythical animals? |
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"Men will send any old shit to get a meet, not all men, but some
mmmm??? I'm not so sure there are some genuine gentlemen on here,and yes it would be nice to arrange a meet with someone you find attractive,but if you have a brain between your ears and they say no,then that's the end for most guys I hope xx"
When we say no it kills them?!
No wonder they get pissed off! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is this the thread where all of us guys rush on to say how *genuinely* lovely we all are and how we're different to all the other guys?
If so, hey I'm *genuinely* lovely and different to all the other guys
lol how can you be genuinely lovely AND different to all the other guys?
It's like that thing where there's a superhero and lots of evil clones pretending to be him. How can we find the real one?!
Umm umm a genuinely lovely guy will have a place in Geneva? Wait, that was done yesterday. Is it something about heffalumps or other mythical animals?"
lol. I was only joking anyway - first sign of rejection and my mouth turns into a sewer |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Good morning
My name is Polite Peter and I love just outside Doncaster.
I have been brought up to treat people how you want to be treated yourself.
Manners and been polite and courteous cost nothing.
I also admire and respect ladies but also adore them.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men will send any old shit to get a meet, not all men, but some
mmmm??? I'm not so sure there are some genuine gentlemen on here,and yes it would be nice to arrange a meet with someone you find attractive,but if you have a brain between your ears and they say no,then that's the end for most guys I hope xx
When we say no it kills them?!
No wonder they get pissed off!"
well they are not true men then,a true man will realise that there has to be mutual attraction,if the lady does,nt fancy you then move on,nothing worse to hear of a man begging for a meet,haway lifes to short for that surely? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Politeness is always nice, but it's when they use the 'I'm polite, not like most of the guys on here' line that it pisses me off.
Very much a turn off when they put down other guys to make themselves good. |
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"Men will send any old shit to get a meet, not all men, but some
mmmm??? I'm not so sure there are some genuine gentlemen on here,and yes it would be nice to arrange a meet with someone you find attractive,but if you have a brain between your ears and they say no,then that's the end for most guys I hope xx
When we say no it kills them?!
No wonder they get pissed off!
well they are not true men then,a true man will realise that there has to be mutual attraction,if the lady does,nt fancy you then move on,nothing worse to hear of a man begging for a meet,haway lifes to short for that surely?"
I was joking. You said it's the end for most guys when a woman says no. You made it sound like they die!
(well I thought it was funny...) |
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"Politeness is always nice, but it's when they use the 'I'm polite, not like most of the guys on here' line that it pisses me off.
Very much a turn off when they put down other guys to make themselves good. "
Yep, that. Do the guys who send that message meet many other guys on here? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men will send any old shit to get a meet, not all men, but some
mmmm??? I'm not so sure there are some genuine gentlemen on here,and yes it would be nice to arrange a meet with someone you find attractive,but if you have a brain between your ears and they say no,then that's the end for most guys I hope xx"
I know there are genuinely polite men on here, as I have met a couple of them, but most think that we will respond to a bit of schmooze better than a 'fancy a fuck' message that they usually send, and try that approach instead... and when that doesn't work either, they get nasty |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men will send any old shit to get a meet, not all men, but some
mmmm??? I'm not so sure there are some genuine gentlemen on here,and yes it would be nice to arrange a meet with someone you find attractive,but if you have a brain between your ears and they say no,then that's the end for most guys I hope xx
I know there are genuinely polite men on here, as I have met a couple of them, but most think that we will respond to a bit of schmooze better than a 'fancy a fuck' message that they usually send, and try that approach instead... and when that doesn't work either, they get nasty "
I don't. Because I'm too polite for that.
*You know, I feel like I'm in a catch 22 on this thread. |
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Us there a polite way if saying fancy a fuck. As you could then combine the two if them together.
"Hello there how are you doing?? , Was looking at your profile and thought please would you fancy a fuk. Thank you for your time"
Shit did I just type that out loud.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men will send any old shit to get a meet, not all men, but some
mmmm??? I'm not so sure there are some genuine gentlemen on here,and yes it would be nice to arrange a meet with someone you find attractive,but if you have a brain between your ears and they say no,then that's the end for most guys I hope xx
I know there are genuinely polite men on here, as I have met a couple of them, but most think that we will respond to a bit of schmooze better than a 'fancy a fuck' message that they usually send, and try that approach instead... and when that doesn't work either, they get nasty "
well again I say they are not true gentlemen and so rightly deserved to be ignored?o
out of curiosity as a male,do you prefer fancy a fuck as an open liner?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Us there a polite way if saying fancy a fuck. As you could then combine the two if them together.
"Hello there how are you doing?? , Was looking at your profile and thought please would you fancy a fuk. Thank you for your time"
Shit did I just type that out loud.
"
ha ha ha pissing myself,what a great way to message someone,im going to try that,polite,yet direct,ill see if it works ha ha ha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's a massive sense of entitlement that some guys have.
It's the same theory, basically, as 'friendzoning'. Guys that complain that the've put friendship or politeness into your slot, so therefore sex should fall out for them. They see women as nothing more than transactions.
Give me honesty and 'fancy a fuk' over faux-politeness any day. |
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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago
not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds) |
And the award for Saturday's ..single guy knocking thread ...the winner is..
Block those genders that cause you grief... Then select those that interest you and message them yourself ..
This tip was brought to you by today's awards sponsor...sodelitedtomeetyou .., other top tip providers are available. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a 'polite message' and replied saying thank you but no thanks... I've had the identical message now from the same poster 6 times - every fortnight. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm all for equal opportunities. ..I'll happily ignore the polite messages as well as the fancy a fuck messages so I've no idea how they handle rejection |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had a 'polite message' and replied saying thank you but no thanks... I've had the identical message now from the same poster 6 times - every fortnight. "
he obviously likes you and is trying the persistence route??? |
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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago
in the eye of the storm |
"I'm coming across a few guys who think that because they aren't sending a fancy a fuk message and are polite, that I am going to meet them?
I get a lot of fancy a fuk type messages. But I get a lot of the polite ones too. It's not an automatic guarantee I will reply, let alone meet.
Weirdly the fancy a fuk guys seem to take rejection better than some of the "polite" ones?
I suspect if I met all the polite ones, they'd be some of the same guys who then would refuse to meet me because I've got too many veris. You can't win.
(NOTE: Not all polite guys and not all guys, it's just a trend that seems to be more common at the moment.)"
to many weri you only have two so what's that all about new profile because the other one run out of space |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Suppose it's a case for some
Men your are damd if you do and damd if you don't . Just some Men are bulletproof and move quickly on to the next one.. the gents, I find from meeting at socials and clubs always stay a gent . As in most dating sites the men sometimes lack basic interaction skills .. hence that's why they are on dating sites in the first place (I'm on three before any one throws that in the
Mix )
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"Oh those polite guys can turn pretty quickly. I had one yesterday. Few nice messages. Pushed for a meet so I politely explained I'm not meeting off here but hoped he found what he was looking for. I then turned into aold, fat, sad, ugly slag. Strange cos up to then I was a goddess personified. With most if them it's just an act until they get what they want or you reject them. "
People have anger issues... |
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"I'm coming across a few guys who think that because they aren't sending a fancy a fuk message and are polite, that I am going to meet them?
I get a lot of fancy a fuk type messages. But I get a lot of the polite ones too. It's not an automatic guarantee I will reply, let alone meet.
Weirdly the fancy a fuk guys seem to take rejection better than some of the "polite" ones?
I suspect if I met all the polite ones, they'd be some of the same guys who then would refuse to meet me because I've got too many veris. You can't win.
(NOTE: Not all polite guys and not all guys, it's just a trend that seems to be more common at the moment.)"
I always send a polite message but I've no idea if blunter fancy a fuck messages would have more success
Either way I'm a polite guy so won't change just because I think it would get me a meet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm coming across a few guys who think that because they aren't sending a fancy a fuk message and are polite, that I am going to meet them?
I get a lot of fancy a fuk type messages. But I get a lot of the polite ones too. It's not an automatic guarantee I will reply, let alone meet.
Weirdly the fancy a fuk guys seem to take rejection better than some of the "polite" ones?
I suspect if I met all the polite ones, they'd be some of the same guys who then would refuse to meet me because I've got too many veris. You can't win.
(NOTE: Not all polite guys and not all guys, it's just a trend that seems to be more common at the moment.)"
Got to say your arse is hot xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We find some of these "polite" messages are from guys that either haven't read our profile or choose to ignore certain aspects,in which case they get deleted with no reply.then the moaning starts |
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"I'm coming across a few guys who think that because they aren't sending a fancy a fuk message and are polite, that I am going to meet them?
I get a lot of fancy a fuk type messages. But I get a lot of the polite ones too. It's not an automatic guarantee I will reply, let alone meet.
Weirdly the fancy a fuk guys seem to take rejection better than some of the "polite" ones?
I suspect if I met all the polite ones, they'd be some of the same guys who then would refuse to meet me because I've got too many veris. You can't win.
(NOTE: Not all polite guys and not all guys, it's just a trend that seems to be more common at the moment.)"
Much as I would never send a "fancy a fuck" message, I never write essays as an introductions. I always write like I would speak to you the 1st time I saw you in the street, pub, supermarket, train. A wink, or a short intro, with a comment about what drew me to your profile. If people think that is too short, lack imagination, delete without replying, I move on, possibly we would not have got on anyway... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm coming across a few guys who think that because they aren't sending a fancy a fuk message and are polite, that I am going to meet them?
I get a lot of fancy a fuk type messages. But I get a lot of the polite ones too. It's not an automatic guarantee I will reply, let alone meet.
Weirdly the fancy a fuk guys seem to take rejection better than some of the "polite" ones?
I suspect if I met all the polite ones, they'd be some of the same guys who then would refuse to meet me because I've got too many veris. You can't win.
(NOTE: Not all polite guys and not all guys, it's just a trend that seems to be more common at the moment.)"
F.A.F, please thankyou?
Thought I'd try mixing it up a bit. |
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"Suppose it's a case for some
Men your are damd if you do and damd if you don't . Just some Men are bulletproof and move quickly on to the next one.. the gents, I find from meeting at socials and clubs always stay a gent . As in most dating sites the men sometimes lack basic interaction skills .. hence that's why they are on dating sites in the first place. .."
Sadly that is true for many lol! I think the main problem is false expectation. Men, particularly young men, come here under the misapprehension that the site is full of easy women who will fuck anyone, and when they have no success their ego takes a hammering, they become increasingly desperate to succeed, but also frustrated and resentful, and sooner or later some poor woman gets it in the neck for saying no, the straw that broke the camels back.
I believe there's some really misleading hype about this site somewhere. |
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"I'm coming across a few guys who think that because they aren't sending a fancy a fuk message and are polite, that I am going to meet them?
I get a lot of fancy a fuk type messages. But I get a lot of the polite ones too. It's not an automatic guarantee I will reply, let alone meet.
Weirdly the fancy a fuk guys seem to take rejection better than some of the "polite" ones?
I suspect if I met all the polite ones, they'd be some of the same guys who then would refuse to meet me because I've got too many veris. You can't win.
(NOTE: Not all polite guys and not all guys, it's just a trend that seems to be more common at the moment.)
Much as I would never send a "fancy a fuck" message, I never write essays as an introductions. I always write like I would speak to you the 1st time I saw you in the street, pub, supermarket, train...
"
Yes, those short off the cuff comments work best - like a comment on a status update or a pic - instantly engaging, and also 'non-threatening' as it were. If someone engages my mind, no telling who I will end up desiring lol!! |
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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago
in the eye of the storm |
"Suppose it's a case for some
Men your are damd if you do and damd if you don't . Just some Men are bulletproof and move quickly on to the next one.. the gents, I find from meeting at socials and clubs always stay a gent . As in most dating sites the men sometimes lack basic interaction skills .. hence that's why they are on dating sites in the first place. ..
Sadly that is true for many lol! I think the main problem is false expectation. Men, particularly young men, come here under the misapprehension that the site is full of easy women who will fuck anyone, and when they have no success their ego takes a hammering, they become increasingly desperate to succeed, but also frustrated and resentful, and sooner or later some poor woman gets it in the neck for saying no, the straw that broke the camels back.
I believe there's some really misleading hype about this site somewhere. "
I have to disagree its not the site that's the problem or the woman couples using it in your example its the ignorance of the guys .
fuck wits will be fuck wits no matter what they here about the site for the simple reason they lack a fucking brain in my opinion |
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"Suppose it's a case for some
Men your are damd if you do and damd if you don't . Just some Men are bulletproof and move quickly on to the next one.. the gents, I find from meeting at socials and clubs always stay a gent . As in most dating sites the men sometimes lack basic interaction skills .. hence that's why they are on dating sites in the first place. ..
Sadly that is true for many lol! I think the main problem is false expectation. Men, particularly young men, come here under the misapprehension that the site is full of easy women who will fuck anyone, and when they have no success their ego takes a hammering, they become increasingly desperate to succeed, but also frustrated and resentful, and sooner or later some poor woman gets it in the neck for saying no, the straw that broke the camels back.
I believe there's some really misleading hype about this site somewhere.
I have to disagree its not the site that's the problem...
"
But I never said it was? |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
"Is this the thread where all of us guys rush on to say how *genuinely* lovely we all are and how we're different to all the other guys?
If so, hey I'm *genuinely* lovely and different to all the other guys
lol how can you be genuinely lovely AND different to all the other guys?
It's like that thing where there's a superhero and lots of evil clones pretending to be him. How can we find the real one?!
Umm umm a genuinely lovely guy will have a place in Geneva? Wait, that was done yesterday. Is it something about heffalumps or other mythical animals?"
Perhaps a genuinely nice guy will have a partner already? Just saying like Anyway I send out the odd very polite message, Not short usually maybe a paragraph or two, put in a bit of humour, light smut, leave an open end...
Delete..That grates a little due to the effort & thought involved but you just mark up a personal message on them and move on..
S |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This won't go down well but I think 95% of the time the content of the message doesn't matter its the profile and how the guy looks. I bet if Tom Hardy was on here with a just pics profile and sent either "Hey, how are you?" Or "Fancy a fuck" messages he would still get a decent amount of replies. If you don't do well with women in the real world you will struggle even more on here than out there. |
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Well, I'm not really offensive in my messages and no woman has ever really been offensive to me.
In the past, I'd send polite messages out... I'd say half were ignored. Being ignored can make you feel a bit frustrated and ofcourse rejected. I think that if this happens time after time, the man can feel worthless and angry.
This is why you get vicious messages back.
There are some things to know on here though... Not only are women a hard find on here, a lot of them actually have no intentions of meeting! They come on for the attention and to feel better about themselves. I've known a few in the past! This can make it even more frustrating for men! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This won't go down well but I think 95% of the time the content of the message doesn't matter its the profile and how the guy looks. I bet if Tom Hardy was on here with a just pics profile and sent either "Hey, how are you?" Or "Fancy a fuck" messages he would still get a decent amount of replies. If you don't do well with women in the real world you will struggle even more on here than out there." nail hit on the head my friend.. |
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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago
in the eye of the storm |
"Is this the thread where all of us guys rush on to say how *genuinely* lovely we all are and how we're different to all the other guys?
If so, hey I'm *genuinely* lovely and different to all the other guys
lol how can you be genuinely lovely AND different to all the other guys?
It's like that thing where there's a superhero and lots of evil clones pretending to be him. How can we find the real one?!
Umm umm a genuinely lovely guy will have a place in Geneva? Wait, that was done yesterday. Is it something about heffalumps or other mythical animals?
Perhaps a genuinely nice guy will have a partner already? Just saying like Anyway I send out the odd very polite message, Not short usually maybe a paragraph or two, put in a bit of humour, light smut, leave an open end...
Delete..That grates a little due to the effort & thought involved but you just mark up a personal message on them and move on..
S"
don't message out of the blue trust me you do far better by responding to those who are brave enough to message you or by only replying to forums post status updates or the odd super hot picture that pops up on your local time line .
most of this game is dependent on timing more than anything else in my opinion get the timing of your message wrong and you will be passed over with out so much as a second look . |
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"I guess a lot of the "fancy a fuck" guys just shotgun out multiple messages , so get less pissed off if the get a no thanks; they are just waiting for the 1/100 "yes" or " maybe" responses .
Whereas some of the " polite" guys think that if the have spend a bit of time, then they are more entitled?
"
That's what I think too. |
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"I'm coming across a few guys who think that because they aren't sending a fancy a fuk message and are polite, that I am going to meet them?
I get a lot of fancy a fuk type messages. But I get a lot of the polite ones too. It's not an automatic guarantee I will reply, let alone meet.
Weirdly the fancy a fuk guys seem to take rejection better than some of the "polite" ones?
I suspect if I met all the polite ones, they'd be some of the same guys who then would refuse to meet me because I've got too many veris. You can't win.
(NOTE: Not all polite guys and not all guys, it's just a trend that seems to be more common at the moment.)
Much as I would never send a "fancy a fuck" message, I never write essays as an introductions. I always write like I would speak to you the 1st time I saw you in the street, pub, supermarket, train. A wink, or a short intro, with a comment about what drew me to your profile. If people think that is too short, lack imagination, delete without replying, I move on, possibly we would not have got on anyway... "
The exception to the rule...if you sent a "fancy a fuck" message I wouldn't ignore it! |
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The faf guys probably have limited recollection upon who they've messaged.
If I ever politely write back that I'm ironing my hair or in the middle of a funeral etc, they don't notice the hindrance and start popping Viagra and buying condoms. One track minds. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We know men have to make an effort with messages, but do women do it as they know they are holding all the cards? lol.
Nah, when we're on a meet, we just lie there. " That is good as well lol |
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By *arrasicMan
over a year ago
birmingham |
Most of the men on here have better body's than the women on here.but just pointing out a fact and always get abused by the women if you dont get one move on till you find a polite one there are nice ones to |
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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago
not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds) |
"We know men have to make an effort with messages, but do women do it as they know they are holding all the cards? lol."
It's a two way street shag...the guys who know their worth know this ,
ladies hold some cards , guys have the same cards .. depends if they wish to play them.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This won't go down well but I think 95% of the time the content of the message doesn't matter its the profile and how the guy looks. I bet if Tom Hardy was on here with a just pics profile and sent either "Hey, how are you?" Or "Fancy a fuck" messages he would still get a decent amount of replies. If you don't do well with women in the real world you will struggle even more on here than out there."
Completely and utterly this. If i don't like the look of someone the message content is irrelevant and my response will normally be no response. It's the easiest way to deal with things and avoid conversations i don't want to have with strangers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We know men have to make an effort with messages, but do women do it as they know they are holding all the cards? lol.
It's a two way street shag...the guys who know their worth know this ,
ladies hold some cards , guys have the same cards .. depends if they wish to play them.. " I like your new name there and you are right there too, half the card each |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh those polite guys can turn pretty quickly. I had one yesterday. Few nice messages. Pushed for a meet so I politely explained I'm not meeting off here but hoped he found what he was looking for. I then turned into aold, fat, sad, ugly slag. Strange cos up to then I was a goddess personified. With most if them it's just an act until they get what they want or you reject them. " oh that sounds so familiar....
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"This won't go down well but I think 95% of the time the content of the message doesn't matter its the profile and how the guy looks. I bet if Tom Hardy was on here with a just pics profile and sent either "Hey, how are you?" Or "Fancy a fuck" messages he would still get a decent amount of replies. If you don't do well with women in the real world you will struggle even more on here than out there.
nail hit on the head my friend.. "
Yep totally agree with this
I've always taken the time to send a "nice" message, some get replies, some deleted and some unread. It happens.
The unread ones are frustrating if you've put in some time and read their profile and you think that you may be their type. They're usually the ones that state "no one liners or fancy a fuck". But like this guy said, if Tom Hardy sent "fancy a fuck" his pants would be off with several ladies waiting to ride him before Roadrunner said beep for a second time! |
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Think there way to many who don't understand the meaning of fun let alone the meaning of swigging your hear for fun or none commitment fun not marrage and the buzz of fucking others you normally wouldn't go with |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Much as I would never send a "fancy a fuck" message, I never write essays as an introductions. I always write like I would speak to you the 1st time I saw you in the street, pub, supermarket, train. A wink, or a short intro, with a comment about what drew me to your profile. If people think that is too short, lack imagination, delete without replying, I move on, possibly we would not have got on anyway... "
That's a good approach. That's why we try to put a bit of personality/character into our profile. It gives an opportunity for people messaging us to have some sort of hook to catch our attention. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This won't go down well but I think 95% of the time the content of the message doesn't matter its the profile and how the guy looks. I bet if Tom Hardy was on here with a just pics profile and sent either "Hey, how are you?" Or "Fancy a fuck" messages he would still get a decent amount of replies. If you don't do well with women in the real world you will struggle even more on here than out there.
nail hit on the head my friend..
Yep totally agree with this
I've always taken the time to send a "nice" message, some get replies, some deleted and some unread. It happens.
The unread ones are frustrating if you've put in some time and read their profile and you think that you may be their type. They're usually the ones that state "no one liners or fancy a fuck". But like this guy said, if Tom Hardy sent "fancy a fuck" his pants would be off with several ladies waiting to ride him before Roadrunner said beep for a second time! "
Yeah that's what I meant even the so called "Sapiosexuals" would be replying to his one liners.
My advice to guys though is never look at your sent box though its as bad as checking the double ticks and last online on whatsapp |
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"This won't go down well but I think 95% of the time the content of the message doesn't matter its the profile and how the guy looks. I bet if Tom Hardy was on here with a just pics profile and sent either "Hey, how are you?" Or "Fancy a fuck" messages he would still get a decent amount of replies. If you don't do well with women in the real world you will struggle even more on here than out there.
nail hit on the head my friend..
Yep totally agree with this
I've always taken the time to send a "nice" message, some get replies, some deleted and some unread. It happens.
The unread ones are frustrating if you've put in some time and read their profile and you think that you may be their type. They're usually the ones that state "no one liners or fancy a fuck". But like this guy said, if Tom Hardy sent "fancy a fuck" his pants would be off with several ladies waiting to ride him before Roadrunner said beep for a second time! "
I think you're right to a degree. However I have met a guy for a social who I didn't think I'd be attracted to based on his photo. His message was pretty awesome so I met him. He ended up being a long term fuck buddy and I haven't found a good replacement for him yet.
But mostly now I want to change my username to roadrunner and my status can be "beep beep". |
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"This won't go down well but I think 95% of the time the content of the message doesn't matter its the profile and how the guy looks. I bet if Tom Hardy was on here with a just pics profile and sent either "Hey, how are you?" Or "Fancy a fuck" messages he would still get a decent amount of replies. If you don't do well with women in the real world you will struggle even more on here than out there.
nail hit on the head my friend..
Yep totally agree with this
I've always taken the time to send a "nice" message, some get replies, some deleted and some unread. It happens.
The unread ones are frustrating if you've put in some time and read their profile and you think that you may be their type. They're usually the ones that state "no one liners or fancy a fuck". But like this guy said, if Tom Hardy sent "fancy a fuck" his pants would be off with several ladies waiting to ride him before Roadrunner said beep for a second time!
I think you're right to a degree. However I have met a guy for a social who I didn't think I'd be attracted to based on his photo. His message was pretty awesome so I met him. He ended up being a long term fuck buddy and I haven't found a good replacement for him yet.
But mostly now I want to change my username to roadrunner and my status can be "beep beep". "
You just never know someone from just a profile or a message. Sounds like you've found an ideal playmate.
If you were roadrunner I guess you'd have several coyotes sending you "fancy a fuck" messages! |
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"This won't go down well but I think 95% of the time the content of the message doesn't matter its the profile and how the guy looks. I bet if Tom Hardy was on here with a just pics profile and sent either "Hey, how are you?" Or "Fancy a fuck" messages he would still get a decent amount of replies. If you don't do well with women in the real world you will struggle even more on here than out there.
nail hit on the head my friend..
Yep totally agree with this
I've always taken the time to send a "nice" message, some get replies, some deleted and some unread. It happens.
The unread ones are frustrating if you've put in some time and read their profile and you think that you may be their type. They're usually the ones that state "no one liners or fancy a fuck". But like this guy said, if Tom Hardy sent "fancy a fuck" his pants would be off with several ladies waiting to ride him before Roadrunner said beep for a second time!
I think you're right to a degree. However I have met a guy for a social who I didn't think I'd be attracted to based on his photo. His message was pretty awesome so I met him. He ended up being a long term fuck buddy and I haven't found a good replacement for him yet.
But mostly now I want to change my username to roadrunner and my status can be "beep beep". " what happened to him |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We know men have to make an effort with messages, but do women do it as they know they are holding all the cards? lol.
Nah, when we're on a meet, we just lie there. That is good as well lol "
No it's not shag...don't encourage them...A wank would be better than a sack of spuds |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think as a single fella my response is this, Your dammed if you do dammed if you don't. I have never been knocked back because I'm a chap and cheeky at that to buy not abusive and I don't beg. Its the same if your in a bar if your a mug you treated like one if your chap it's all good. Well it's been that way for me. Anyway i must be that good. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's like the guys with "nice guy" worked into the username so far in my experience they're the biggest dickheads of them all "
on POF i'm finding that yeah. |
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"You are one of the rare few who actually have a nice body (yes i know- its my opinion).
Even id love to have sex with you. If you fancy having sex some time lol.
Seriously i think that as you have good photo style along with a good body its not suprising you get messages from both types. Your photos seem quite inviting. Both in a polite and a naughty way. You aim at all sectors as it were lol. "
Even us mere mortals get these types of messages from men |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Personally I find there are more timewaster on here than not,not matter what how you put it nice or sleazy,most will mess about,I answer all messages/winks if I'm interested I say so,if I'm not I say so,I treat people as I would in a face to face situation |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Personally I find there are more timewaster on here than not,not matter what how you put it nice or sleazy,most will mess about,I answer all messages/winks if I'm interested I say so,if I'm not I say so,I treat people as I would in a face to face situation"
If you saw how many messages women got in a day, you would have a different opinion. We would need an admin assistant to reply to all messages. |
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"Personally I find there are more timewaster on here than not,not matter what how you put it nice or sleazy,most will mess about,I answer all messages/winks if I'm interested I say so,if I'm not I say so,I treat people as I would in a face to face situation
If you saw how many messages women got in a day, you would have a different opinion. We would need an admin assistant to reply to all messages. "
Now that would be a great profile.....single woman needs admin assistant.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Personally I find there are more timewaster on here than not,not matter what how you put it nice or sleazy,most will mess about,I answer all messages/winks if I'm interested I say so,if I'm not I say so,I treat people as I would in a face to face situation
If you saw how many messages women got in a day, you would have a different opinion. We would need an admin assistant to reply to all messages. "
But manners cost nowt and they won't keep bothering you
|
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I don't see the need for the ladies to reply to every message when the answers no.
If i don't get a reply I assume it's a no and wouldn't then send further messages
However if a lady does send a polite thanks for the message but you're not for me that's all good
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don't see the need for the ladies to reply to every message when the answers no.
If i don't get a reply I assume it's a no and wouldn't then send further messages
However if a lady does send a polite thanks for the message but you're not for me that's all good
"
the later would be better |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'm always polite when I message & wouldn't even consider send
" fancy a fuck luv?"
As a message....
Much prefer....
" would you be interested in taking part in some consensual fornication?"
Much more polite n friendly....lol
|
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"Personally I find there are more timewaster on here than not,not matter what how you put it nice or sleazy,most will mess about,I answer all messages/winks if I'm interested I say so,if I'm not I say so,I treat people as I would in a face to face situation
If you saw how many messages women got in a day, you would have a different opinion. We would need an admin assistant to reply to all messages.
But manners cost nowt and they won't keep bothering you
"
In this case manners would cost the salary of the admin assistant needed to answer all the messages...
|
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"I'm coming across a few guys who think that because they aren't sending a fancy a fuk message and are polite, that I am going to meet them?
I get a lot of fancy a fuk type messages. But I get a lot of the polite ones too. It's not an automatic guarantee I will reply, let alone meet.
Weirdly the fancy a fuk guys seem to take rejection better than some of the "polite" ones?
I suspect if I met all the polite ones, they'd be some of the same guys who then would refuse to meet me because I've got too many veris. You can't win.
(NOTE: Not all polite guys and not all guys, it's just a trend that seems to be more common at the moment.)
Much as I would never send a "fancy a fuck" message, I never write essays as an introductions. I always write like I would speak to you the 1st time I saw you in the street, pub, supermarket, train. A wink, or a short intro, with a comment about what drew me to your profile. If people think that is too short, lack imagination, delete without replying, I move on, possibly we would not have got on anyway...
The exception to the rule...if you sent a "fancy a fuck" message I wouldn't ignore it! "
Tease... I would jump at the chance... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
But manners cost nowt and they won't keep bothering you
"
But they dooooo! They do keep bothering you! They reply, they ask why, they try and carry on the conversation with 'a friendly chat' and then they ask you to meet again and act wounded when you say no - again! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I always send a polite message. If I do get a "no thanks" then I continue the politeness by thanking them for at least having the decency to reply.
If I was to meet a lady from here. I wouldn't care if she had 100+ verifications, if anything, higher numbers of verifications prove that the lady is genuine!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I always send a polite message. If I do get a "no thanks" then I continue the politeness by thanking them for at least having the decency to reply.
"
God, that's one of my absolute pet hates on this site...
If you get a 'no thank you' just delete and move on. No more contact is needed. Nada. Zip. Zilch. |
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My messages are always polite but I don't expect anything from it.
Its just my style- I would never expect anything whether you liked polite messages or not.
Guys that think otherwise are a bit silly and not doing themselves or tue ladies on here any favours. |
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"I always send a polite message. If I do get a "no thanks" then I continue the politeness by thanking them for at least having the decency to reply.
God, that's one of my absolute pet hates on this site...
If you get a 'no thank you' just delete and move on. No more contact is needed. Nada. Zip. Zilch."
|
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"
But manners cost nowt and they won't keep bothering you
But they dooooo! They do keep bothering you! They reply, they ask why, they try and carry on the conversation with 'a friendly chat' and then they ask you to meet again and act wounded when you say no - again!" .
Or months or even years down the line they message you again as they've forgotten they messaged you and you said no and because you replied there's no "you've already messaged this person and got no reply" warning message to prevent them from remessagjng |
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"Personally I find there are more timewaster on here than not,not matter what how you put it nice or sleazy,most will mess about,I answer all messages/winks if I'm interested I say so,if I'm not I say so,I treat people as I would in a face to face situation"
Ah but you don't because in person people immediately know what you look like in order to judge their attraction to you and you've got no public pics so they can't do that. |
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By *iver2015Woman
over a year ago
middlesbrough |
"This won't go down well but I think 95% of the time the content of the message doesn't matter its the profile and how the guy looks. I bet if Tom Hardy was on here with a just pics profile and sent either "Hey, how are you?" Or "Fancy a fuck" messages he would still get a decent amount of replies. If you don't do well with women in the real world you will struggle even more on here than out there."
I politely disagree I've had a few where their pictures have looked great to me personally but they've said things like "I want to fuck your ass" or "I want to impregnate you" as openers and any good looks go out of the window. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I had a message from a guy this morning. One word. " Slag". I read his profile and apparently he was a polite, respectful and decent guy. And so on. Go figure that out... |
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"
But manners cost nowt and they won't keep bothering you
But they dooooo! They do keep bothering you! They reply, they ask why, they try and carry on the conversation with 'a friendly chat' and then they ask you to meet again and act wounded when you say no - again!"
Some people don't understand the word no thanks though..Some think that if you are in here then you should be meeting and if you say no they brand you a time waster. Then they come in here and complain lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I had a message from a guy this morning. One word. " Slag". I read his profile and apparently he was a polite, respectful and decent guy. And so on. Go figure that out... "
A silver tongued charmer too. I take it that didn't get your motor running? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I always send a polite message. If I do get a "no thanks" then I continue the politeness by thanking them for at least having the decency to reply.
God, that's one of my absolute pet hates on this site...
If you get a 'no thank you' just delete and move on. No more contact is needed. Nada. Zip. Zilch."
I do that sometimes..just a quick thanks for the reply.
I leave it as that though,..it's not an attempt at wheedling more conversation..just a cheers. But I'd do that in real life anyhow..If someone tells me no over anything they always get a 'thanks anyway' just the way I am I suppose. |
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By *ezzelsMan
over a year ago
cheshire and north wales |
No one has ever been offended by someone with good manners. I place a high moral value on the way people behave. I find it repellent to have a lot, and to behave with anything other than courtesy in the old sense of the word - politeness of the heart, a gentleness of the heart..the fancy a fuck men see no value in your reply, their scattergun approach ..a true genuine man may feel hurt, as their values which they have invested in you are worthy of a similar investment. . |
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""a true genuine man may feel hurt, as their values which they have invested in you are worthy of a similar investment. .""
So basically because they sent us a personally crafted message essentially asking for attention and said please at the end, and we said no thanks, that gives them the right to be abusive and nasty? |
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I personally always send a polite message. Don't always get a reply, but when I do get one it's usually a no thanks. That's fine by me. If people are being rude to you just block them and move on. I know everyone is different , but I also know I'm not going to be shagging every lady on here. Sometimes when a person doesn't reply and just deletes your message it is rude but slanging them off won't sort it out.x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I always send polite messages and always get a reply.
I believe its because usually its clear my messages are not trying to meet for a fuck.
Im usually sending a message to compliment someones profile information, a very well artistic photo, or a stupid/attempted-witty response to a status update they posted. Yeah, i use fab more for social connections with people with same mind than the actual sex its self. Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I had a message from a guy this morning. One word. " Slag". I read his profile and apparently he was a polite, respectful and decent guy. And so on. Go figure that out...
A silver tongued charmer too. I take it that didn't get your motor running? "
Nope. I sent him a message implying his behaviour and profile were contradictory and he then blocked me. Lucky lucky me. |
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"I tried the polite way but no response. Maybe I was there wrong polite lol. What do you deem a polite message? "
In most cases where you don't get a reply, it's not down to the message as much as the profile. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I prefer to send friend invites.
They're not lazy.
They're not insulting.
They are a gesture of friendliness.
If someone accepts then I'll take that as it's OK to chat.
If not, C'est la vie. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I prefer to send friend invites.
They're not lazy.
They're not insulting.
They are a gesture of friendliness.
If someone accepts then I'll take that as it's OK to chat.
If not, C'est la vie. "
it doesn't matter if the sender thinks they're not lazy and a gesture of friendliness. What gets them accepted or declined is the recipient's view on them. Sent even with the friendliest of intentions a friend request alone will still be binned as lazy if the recipient sees them as lazy.
you wouldn't in real life walk up to a stranger and ask them to be your friend before talking to them. I don't get why being on line changes that? It's still ultimately a person your interacting with. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm coming across a few guys who think that because they aren't sending a fancy a fuk message and are polite, that I am going to meet them?
I get a lot of fancy a fuk type messages. But I get a lot of the polite ones too. It's not an automatic guarantee I will reply, let alone meet.
Weirdly the fancy a fuk guys seem to take rejection better than some of the "polite" ones?
I suspect if I met all the polite ones, they'd be some of the same guys who then would refuse to meet me because I've got too many veris. You can't win.
(NOTE: Not all polite guys and not all guys, it's just a trend that seems to be more common at the moment.)"
Glad you put the note comment on I was polite you didn't reply and I took the hint lol |
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By *ercuryMan
over a year ago
Grantham |
I always send polite messages, because that's the way that I was brought up. To respect women and to respect the word NO.
I hope for a reply, but if I don't get one, even if it's a TBNT, then that probably says more about them than me.
And if it is TBNT, then it's respected and left at that. |
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"I prefer to send friend invites.
They're not lazy.
They're not insulting.
They are a gesture of friendliness.
If someone accepts then I'll take that as it's OK to chat.
If not, C'est la vie. "
No one gets to be my friend without interacting with me first both on here and in the real world. You honestly think someone you'd be able to walk up to a stranger on the street and say we're friends now, without saying anything else to them or do you think they might get a "excuse me but who the fuck are you?" Type response for trying it. Same basic principles apply online to publicly meeting someone, why so many people think otherwise truly baffles me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always send polite messages, sadly I rarely get replies. Either I'm taking the wrong entry into conversations
.....or.....I'm.....just.....too.....ugly..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Polite messages always, usually with my attempt at humour and never about fancy a fuck.
I'm here for a chat and if it works out and we meet then thats a bonus.
Mixed success (mostly no reply) but im not bothered, certainly wouldn't change to try and get sex...
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By *reykiwi500Man
over a year ago
West Kent (near Tonbridge) |
"I prefer to send friend invites.
They're not lazy.
They're not insulting.
They are a gesture of friendliness.
If someone accepts then I'll take that as it's OK to chat.
If not, C'est la vie.
it doesn't matter if the sender thinks they're not lazy and a gesture of friendliness. What gets them accepted or declined is the recipient's view on them. Sent even with the friendliest of intentions a friend request alone will still be binned as lazy if the recipient sees them as lazy.
you wouldn't in real life walk up to a stranger and ask them to be your friend before talking to them. I don't get why being on line changes that? It's still ultimately a person your interacting with."
I'd never dream of sending a friend invite unless I'd interacted with the intended recipient or they'd made it clear it was OK. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As many have already said in here we can't win really,I always try to be polite,will send a few pics,always compliment but hardly ever get replies,seems if your not "gym fit" you stand hardly any chance of even being spoken to let alone a meet,I've somehow had a couple of meets so I do count myself lucky lol.
However there's no need to kick off after rejection I wouldn't start with the verbal if I got turned down in person so I'm not gunna turn into the keyboard warrior because a woman wants a six pack over a good laugh |
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"I prefer to send friend invites.
They're not lazy.
They're not insulting.
They are a gesture of friendliness.
If someone accepts then I'll take that as it's OK to chat.
If not, C'est la vie. "
A lot of people have much more revealing photos in their friends gallery. So you're often essentially asking to see those more private photos without even having asked.
I think that's how a fair few see it? |
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