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Me and my affair, channel 5
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Just seems like people will find opportunity in every circumstance, that young dude said it was due to his father dying when he was young and left him emotionally detached. The main one is life after children and the guy feeling like the partner had no time for him anymore. No sex.
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"Just seems like people will find opportunity in every circumstance, that young dude said it was due to his father dying when he was young and left him emotionally detached. The main one is life after children and the guy feeling like the partner had no time for him anymore. No sex.
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People will use any excuse they think will give them sympathy...My father died when I was six and my childhood wasn't nice at all but it hasn't made me ignore or forget that you should 'do the right thing'. I'm not saying I've never done anything wrong but I've never betrayed a loved one. |
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Watching it on +1.
As always, it's interesting to see it from everyone's perspective, but sad that so many of the people who were cheated on feel that they were in no way responsible for keeping the love alive.
Mr ddc |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Watching it on +1.
As always, it's interesting to see it from everyone's perspective, but sad that so many of the people who were cheated on feel that they were in no way responsible for keeping the love alive.
Mr ddc"
I haven't watched it (but maybe I will now) but I have come across this out in the real world.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Watching it on +1.
As always, it's interesting to see it from everyone's perspective, but sad that so many of the people who were cheated on feel that they were in no way responsible for keeping the love alive.
Mr ddc"
That's not an unusual, just reading the comments on these type of threads will show you that.
And yes I agree with you, it is sad  |
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"Watching it on +1.
As always, it's interesting to see it from everyone's perspective, but sad that so many of the people who were cheated on feel that they were in no way responsible for keeping the love alive.
Mr ddc
That's not an unusual, just reading the comments on these type of threads will show you that.
And yes I agree with you, it is sad "
I sometimes wonder how society put so much pressure on couples to have perfection. So much so that when one falters, the other feels the need to write off everything they have ever had? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Watching it on +1.
As always, it's interesting to see it from everyone's perspective, but sad that so many of the people who were cheated on feel that they were in no way responsible for keeping the love alive.
Mr ddc
That's not an unusual, just reading the comments on these type of threads will show you that.
And yes I agree with you, it is sad
I sometimes wonder how society put so much pressure on couples to have perfection. So much so that when one falters, the other feels the need to write off everything they have ever had? "
There's a brilliant TED talk which covers that very well.
She makes a point in saying that nowadays staying is the new 'shame' where years ago divorce was. It's commonplace to advise someone to throw him / her out as opposed too how can you salvage & work through it. |
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"Watching it on +1.
As always, it's interesting to see it from everyone's perspective, but sad that so many of the people who were cheated on feel that they were in no way responsible for keeping the love alive.
Mr ddc
That's not an unusual, just reading the comments on these type of threads will show you that.
And yes I agree with you, it is sad
I sometimes wonder how society put so much pressure on couples to have perfection. So much so that when one falters, the other feels the need to write off everything they have ever had?
There's a brilliant TED talk which covers that very well.
She makes a point in saying that nowadays staying is the new 'shame' where years ago divorce was. It's commonplace to advise someone to throw him / her out as opposed too how can you salvage & work through it."
I could understand that if Fab was full of loads of happy exes, but too often the 'cheater' threads show something else. It seemed the two who stuck with it seemed the happiest.
I know it's probably something very serious, but I can't help thinking a TED talk involves Mark Wahlberg and a cartoon bear 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was married for 23 years and never cheated nor had an affair,
but the last 3 years of my marriage was sexless,it wasn't until I relaised how important sex was in a marriage,that I even thought about having an affair (I didn't)but I totally got where people were coming from.
the want need and desire to be desired is so important in any relationship no matter how long you are together. |
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"Watching it on +1.
As always, it's interesting to see it from everyone's perspective, but sad that so many of the people who were cheated on feel that they were in no way responsible for keeping the love alive.
Mr ddc
I haven't watched it (but maybe I will now) but I have come across this out in the real world.
"
Yep!  |
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"It's on catch up, will give it a watch. Seems like people are too easy to blame things on there up bringing. "
I may be muddled (I came in midway so missed any introductions) but I think the person who had sat down and tried to understand why he felt the need to do it, was the only one whose marriage survived.
There was a woman at work who went through a very similar process (interestingly for an identical reason). My Dad too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Didn't manage to watch it but this reminds me of what I was taught about relationships...
Always take 100% responsiblity for making your relationship work, if you only put in 50% each, when it all goes wrong you can guarantee it will never be your 50% that caused the problem.
Sounds like the cheaters in this show were only taking their 50% and blaming the failure on others |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If the trust goes in a relationship , the relationship will be doomed . The questions will always be there , and rationality goes out of the window .
So the cheater will always be doubted , and the one who was betrayed will always wonder ...
The reasons for the cheating are irelevent , it's what's left afterwards that matters .
So in my opinion , despite the programme and the couple who ' made it work ' succeeding , it's always going to be an uphill battle to restore the most important part of the relationship - trust .
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"If the trust goes in a relationship , the relationship will be doomed . The questions will always be there , and rationality goes out of the window .
So the cheater will always be doubted , and the one who was betrayed will always wonder ...
The reasons for the cheating are irelevent , it's what's left afterwards that matters .
So in my opinion , despite the programme and the couple who ' made it work ' succeeding , it's always going to be an uphill battle to restore the most important part of the relationship - trust .
"
Agree!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Watching it on +1.
As always, it's interesting to see it from everyone's perspective, but sad that so many of the people who were cheated on feel that they were in no way responsible for keeping the love alive.
Mr ddc
That's not an unusual, just reading the comments on these type of threads will show you that.
And yes I agree with you, it is sad
I sometimes wonder how society put so much pressure on couples to have perfection. So much so that when one falters, the other feels the need to write off everything they have ever had?
There's a brilliant TED talk which covers that very well.
She makes a point in saying that nowadays staying is the new 'shame' where years ago divorce was. It's commonplace to advise someone to throw him / her out as opposed too how can you salvage & work through it.
I could understand that if Fab was full of loads of happy exes, but too often the 'cheater' threads show something else. It seemed the two who stuck with it seemed the happiest.
I know it's probably something very serious, but I can't help thinking a TED talk involves Mark Wahlberg and a cartoon bear
"
Ha! I know what you mean re TED 
The cheater threads on here generally show long term underlying bitterness. Which I suppose isn't unusual if the person who was cheated on absolved themselves of any blame whatsoever.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have met many guys on here who have confessed during the meet that they were married. It reinforces my belief that well over half of the guys in the age group o am meeting are married and pretending to be single. |
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"I have met many guys on here who have confessed during the meet that they were married. It reinforces my belief that well over half of the guys in the age group o am meeting are married and pretending to be single."
That's why we assume most people above a certain age who can't accommodate are not really single. There are other signs too but this is the easiest to spot. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Watching it on +1.
As always, it's interesting to see it from everyone's perspective, but sad that so many of the people who were cheated on feel that they were in no way responsible for keeping the love alive.
Mr ddc"
While I agree that both parties are responsible for the state of the relationship, only the cheater is responsible for cheating. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have met many guys on here who have confessed during the meet that they were married. It reinforces my belief that well over half of the guys in the age group o am meeting are married and pretending to be single."
Half? Our guess is 75% at the least. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"that's the problem with people who have affairs.. they will blame everyone except themselves
This "
Not always. I've cheated on both my husband's and admited that I was a fault hence the fact that I'm staying single now. I'm not an easy person to live with. Saying that tho some of my faults I have now discovered is down to illness. Xxx |
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"Watching it on +1.
As always, it's interesting to see it from everyone's perspective, but sad that so many of the people who were cheated on feel that they were in no way responsible for keeping the love alive.
Mr ddc
While I agree that both parties are responsible for the state of the relationship, only the cheater is responsible for cheating."
Whilst I agree to some extent that only the person involved can decide whether or not to cheat, the underlying causes can arise for a variety of reasons, and the ultimate outcome depends more on the person who was cheated on. My point was that it was sad how many seemed to regret the position in which they found themselves, as if they had had no say in the final outcome.
I remember a headline once saying "Nearly half of marriages end in failure" and thinking "Wow, more than half of marriages last forever, isn't that something to celebrate?"
(and aim for?) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it's very easy for swinging couples to judge people that play away. Some couples swing because they can't stay faithful. Some don't. And I'm sure a few still stray in relationships from what single females have told me when Mr contacts them behind Mrs back  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Watching it on +1.
As always, it's interesting to see it from everyone's perspective, but sad that so many of the people who were cheated on feel that they were in no way responsible for keeping the love alive.
Mr ddc
While I agree that both parties are responsible for the state of the relationship, only the cheater is responsible for cheating.
Whilst I agree to some extent that only the person involved can decide whether or not to cheat, the underlying causes can arise for a variety of reasons, and the ultimate outcome depends more on the person who was cheated on. My point was that it was sad how many seemed to regret the position in which they found themselves, as if they had had no say in the final outcome.
I remember a headline once saying "Nearly half of marriages end in failure" and thinking "Wow, more than half of marriages last forever, isn't that something to celebrate?"
(and aim for?)"
I remember reading articles saying that only 11% of marriages have two happy partners in them, simply staying married is no indicator of "success" |
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"
I remember reading articles saying that only 11% of marriages have two happy partners in them, simply staying married is no indicator of "success""
Pfft, statistics.
83% of us know that we only pay heed to the 17% of statistics that support our pre-existing views
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I remember reading articles saying that only 11% of marriages have two happy partners in them, simply staying married is no indicator of "success"
Pfft, statistics.
83% of us know that we only pay heed to the 17% of statistics that support our pre-existing views
"
Married people live longer according to statistics too,or does it just feel that way? |
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"
I remember reading articles saying that only 11% of marriages have two happy partners in them, simply staying married is no indicator of "success"
Pfft, statistics.
83% of us know that we only pay heed to the 17% of statistics that support our pre-existing views
Married people live longer according to statistics too,or does it just feel that way? "
Married and those with pets!! All i need is a good man, a good horse and a cat - sorted!   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think it's very easy for swinging couples to judge people that play away. Some couples swing because they can't stay faithful. Some don't. And I'm sure a few still stray in relationships from what single females have told me when Mr contacts them behind Mrs back "
This has happened more than a few times to me with swinging couples but obviously that's not to say all swinging couples are doing that.
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