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Single forever?!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Do you think some of us are just absolute odd balls 
I do t picture the future with anyone, I genuinely think I'm gonna be single forever as that's how I envision it! I don't want anyone - surely this is normal?
People do end up spending their whole lives alone... Don't they?! I'm think me, 5 cats and yesterday's breakfast on my top.
What a grim vision lol but some people are just meant to be alone, aren't they?! BOLLOCKS to this it'll happen when you least expect it... It's been bloody years now lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have been single all my life too and I like it. I am just too busy with bodybuilding, meal prepping and going to the gym  "
Sounds great in theory but what happens on another 10 years time?! I'm seriously worried lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This. 
There's such pressure in people to find someone ...OP if you never did find someone, if you spent your life 'alone', would that be such a terrible thing? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have been single all my life too and I like it. I am just too busy with bodybuilding, meal prepping and going to the gym
Sounds great in theory but what happens on another 10 years time?! I'm seriously worried lol "
I reckon I will do the same thing, what about you? I believe in fate tho. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you think some of us are just absolute odd balls
I do t picture the future with anyone, I genuinely think I'm gonna be single forever as that's how I envision it! I don't want anyone - surely this is normal?
People do end up spending their whole lives alone... Don't they?! I'm think me, 5 cats and yesterday's breakfast on my top.
What a grim vision lol but some people are just meant to be alone, aren't they?! BOLLOCKS to this it'll happen when you least expect it... It's been bloody years now lol "
5 cats is cool, I have 4.Change your t shirt though lazybones XXX |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you think some of us are just absolute odd balls
I do t picture the future with anyone, I genuinely think I'm gonna be single forever as that's how I envision it! I don't want anyone - surely this is normal?
People do end up spending their whole lives alone... Don't they?! I'm think me, 5 cats and yesterday's breakfast on my top.
What a grim vision lol but some people are just meant to be alone, aren't they?! BOLLOCKS to this it'll happen when you least expect it... It's been bloody years now lol "
Being Single was My Life Goal having My own space No Arguing No Fighting then having to Apologise "If" I was Wrong No Waiting for Apologies when He "Is" Wrong,Me being Single was a Necessity. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have been single all my life too and I like it. I am just too busy with bodybuilding, meal prepping and going to the gym
Sounds great in theory but what happens on another 10 years time?! I'm seriously worried lol "
Im the same , never married I'm sure il be an old woman with 5 cats  |
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"Do you think some of us are just absolute odd balls
I do t picture the future with anyone, I genuinely think I'm gonna be single forever as that's how I envision it! I don't want anyone - surely this is normal?
People do end up spending their whole lives alone... Don't they?! I'm think me, 5 cats and yesterday's breakfast on my top.
What a grim vision lol but some people are just meant to be alone, aren't they?! BOLLOCKS to this it'll happen when you least expect it... It's been bloody years now lol "
You're 27 lol - anything could happen!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having been married twice and been in a few long term relationships,life just seemed to consist of making tea and washing dishes.In the times when I've been single, life has mostly seemed to consist of,,,,whatever the hell I want to do.
I really think relationships are over rated. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Do you think some of us are just absolute odd balls
I do t picture the future with anyone, I genuinely think I'm gonna be single forever as that's how I envision it! I don't want anyone - surely this is normal?
People do end up spending their whole lives alone... Don't they?! I'm think me, 5 cats and yesterday's breakfast on my top.
What a grim vision lol but some people are just meant to be alone, aren't they?! BOLLOCKS to this it'll happen when you least expect it... It's been bloody years now lol
You're 27 lol - anything could happen!! "
No, nothing is happening lol nothing! Just mulling around day in day out. It's my own fault. That fucking suicide thread started this!
IM OFF TO DIGNITAS LOL TARA! |
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"Do you think some of us are just absolute odd balls
I do t picture the future with anyone, I genuinely think I'm gonna be single forever as that's how I envision it! I don't want anyone - surely this is normal?
People do end up spending their whole lives alone... Don't they?! I'm think me, 5 cats and yesterday's breakfast on my top.
What a grim vision lol but some people are just meant to be alone, aren't they?! BOLLOCKS to this it'll happen when you least expect it... It's been bloody years now lol
You're 27 lol - anything could happen!!
No, nothing is happening lol nothing! Just mulling around day in day out. It's my own fault. That fucking suicide thread started this!
IM OFF TO DIGNITAS LOL TARA!"
Don't sweat it - you have eons of time yet ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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being single is fun,no one to answer to,do what you want and like anytime,come and go when you please??
it,s great,having said that ive came out of a 23 year marriage a year ago,so I guess im bound to say that ha ha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have only ever had one relationship in my life, we was together for five years, besides that I've been alone all my life
I've spent that many years alone I'm just used to it now, I don't think I'm relationship material
Some people just have a need to be with somebody, I know a few people who as soon as they are out of one relationship they are looking for another, not everybody has that need I genuinely do think some people do better alone
I like the ability to be able to do what I like, come and go where and when I like, walk round the house naked, watch whatever i want on the TV, go to bed when I want, fart when I want  |
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I've been single for a good few year's now,probably one of the reasons is because I've been messing about on here too much rather than dating to find someone. Dating can be a bit of a chore though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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ive been single about 6 years now .kinda gave up on meeting anyone that would want a tranny that ,due to prostrate surgery was unable to ejaculate and had trouble getting hard..
tbh i still got lonely when i was with someone ,because they didnt know the real me .. lifes better now im open and honest about what i am ,even if i am single ..i think i would find it very difficult being in a relationship after 6 years of doing what i want when i want and not having arguments with crazy girlfriends ,which when i look back, most were |
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I know quite a few people who never got married or are in a relationship.
I admire them for being different and not doing what everyone else does because its the thing to do or they are afraid to be alone. I sometimes wish i could be like them, independant. Both my brother and sister arent in a relationship only my other brother is and he has changed so much, it seems a shame that people feel they have to change when they live with someone.
I have changed a lot in some ways myself because it was the only way that our marriage could have worked.
Having kids changes you too you cant be the same person ever again.
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"I've been single for a good few year's now,probably one of the reasons is because I've been messing about on here too much rather than dating to find someone. "
Yes, I have to keep slapping myself and reminding myself that what I actually want is 24/7/365 again! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I find the thought of spending my life alone horrible, and hate the though that my branch of the tree, ends with me.
If I wasn't going to continue my bloodline, then why was I even born? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I find the thought of spending my life alone horrible, and hate the though that my branch of the tree, ends with me.
If I wasn't going to continue my bloodline, then why was I even born?"
cheerful  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I find the thought of spending my life alone horrible, and hate the though that my branch of the tree, ends with me.
If I wasn't going to continue my bloodline, then why was I even born?"
It's not a waste of life if you don't have children
If you want children then fair enough I can understand your wanting to be with somebody but don't feel there's no point being here if you don't reproduce |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
probably..never say never and all that, but cant see it myself, too many things i want to do before i die and i don't want to feel i have to ask anyone's permission to do them. probably could never be monogamous again either. happy and content with what i have for now.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think being single forever makes us odd balls, it makes us.... Well us.
The done thing years ago was to find a person of opposite sex (cough  ) settle down and promise forever...... And ever.....and ever.
It's more acceptable now adays to not have to do that.
I think all us "odd balls" are just evolution, like when people were classed as highly intelligent but socially backwards. They were frowned upon, even though it's been happening since the beginning of time, now it's acceptable.
Each to there own, freedom to live how we chose I believe is a HUGE improvement on life.
Signed - woman looking up cats x |
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"Personally I find the thought of spending my life alone horrible, and hate the though that my branch of the tree, ends with me.
If I wasn't going to continue my bloodline, then why was I even born?"
Why because you might be lonely?
There is more to life than having kids.
You probably have been made to feel that is what youre supposed to do.
Think of all the good things about not having kids, you have your freedom, more money, less responsibility.
You could have a wife who nagged you, didnt have time for you but you had to stay with her for the sake of the kids etc etc. People get bored with each other. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I find the thought of spending my life alone horrible, and hate the though that my branch of the tree, ends with me.
If I wasn't going to continue my bloodline, then why was I even born?
cheerful "
Just offering a little perspective. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This.
There's such pressure in people to find someone ...OP if you never did find someone, if you spent your life 'alone', would that be such a terrible thing?"
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I have been married/part of a couple a total of 13 years and I am now 61. I have been single for 20 years since I left my husband. I have had a few boyfriends but never lived with anyone recently. I have wasted the last 6 years with a guy who pretended we had a relationship but we were just fuck buddies. He is a good fuck but not capable of anything more. I'd like to have a partner but I am not going to compromise my freedom for anything ordinary - I want some one really special ...... it might not happen but I am pretty special and compromise is diminishing. Its good to be valued .... especially by yourself x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think unless you find the PERFECT person to share your life, being single will always be the happier and most peaceful option. Until you have to get into that big lonely bed of course. There's perks to both but having spent an hour, at 3am, arguing about why neither of us could sleep (a mixture of snoring and playing loud music), I'm slightly more swayed to wanting the single life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I find the thought of spending my life alone horrible, and hate the though that my branch of the tree, ends with me.
If I wasn't going to continue my bloodline, then why was I even born?"
What if you found a woman who was absolutely perfect in every way, made you happy each and every day, fell in love, bought a house, married and planned a family - then found out that for what ever reason either you or her couldn't have children?
That you were happy but couldn't conceive.
What would you do then? Would you question why you were born? Is carrying the bloodline that important that it would screw everything?
Far, far much more to life than procreation x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I find the thought of spending my life alone horrible, and hate the though that my branch of the tree, ends with me.
If I wasn't going to continue my bloodline, then why was I even born?
cheerful
Just offering a little perspective."
well its a strange perspective IMO...
there is still time yet for you to sow your seed..
look at Mick Jagger and all those old fogeys fathering kids ..
some people just aren't cut out to spend their lives with anyone, let alone someone who may not be suitable anyway so why not join a sperm bank ...just in case |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I love being single, I enjoy doing whatever the fuck I want "
Same for me
I've only had one relationship and it was that bad I've nevet ever risk putting myself in that situation again
Took me a long time to get out of it and get my life back, theres no way I'd go through that again
I love having my own life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I love being single, I enjoy doing whatever the fuck I want
Same for me
I've only had one relationship and it was that bad I've nevet ever risk putting myself in that situation again
Took me a long time to get out of it and get my life back, theres no way I'd go through that again
I love having my own life "
I'm really sorry to hear that. I've had two relationships in my life and both were with absolutely fantastic people, we just weren't meant to be together.
Now I think id rather be on my own than with the wrong person, and I _iew single life as something I'd need to sacrifice for a relationship, rather than a relationship being a goal |
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Been single for a few years now and the loneliness is horrible. Empty bed. Nobody to kiss/cuddle. Definitely happier when in a relationship but it's hard to meet because I don't go to pubs/clubs as it's not my thing. Which is funny because I would go pubbing/clubbing if I were in a couple but not into the singles scene. Would love to find a girlfriend/cuckold/female fwb if I'm lucky. |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
"I love being single, I enjoy doing whatever the fuck I want
Same for me
I've only had one relationship and it was that bad I've nevet ever risk putting myself in that situation again
Took me a long time to get out of it and get my life back, theres no way I'd go through that again
I love having my own life
I'm really sorry to hear that. I've had two relationships in my life and both were with absolutely fantastic people, we just weren't meant to be together.
Now I think id rather be on my own than with the wrong person, and I _iew single life as something I'd need to sacrifice for a relationship, rather than a relationship being a goal "
this..well put xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I find the thought of spending my life alone horrible, and hate the though that my branch of the tree, ends with me.
If I wasn't going to continue my bloodline, then why was I even born?
What if you found a woman who was absolutely perfect in every way, made you happy each and every day, fell in love, bought a house, married and planned a family - then found out that for what ever reason either you or her couldn't have children?
That you were happy but couldn't conceive.
What would you do then? Would you question why you were born? Is carrying the bloodline that important that it would screw everything?
Far, far much more to life than procreation x"
If I was fortunate enough to find myself with someone where we can both enjoy that kind of bliss together, then I feel my perspective and purpose may change.
Feeling loved and wanted in the world, I'd look to share that by adopting - if life was good enough to me, to give me someone who could end my feelings of loneliness and isolation, then I was see it as my place to pass on than boon, there are many kids out there who'd love a good, loving mum and dad, and if me and my partner could raise a few as our own kids, to become healthy, happy human beings, who are there in my final moments to hold my hand and say 'I love you dad', then I reckon we'd both spent our lives well. |
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I love being single but now my ex is getting married soon (we all get on well, she wanted to borrow one of my drag dresses for the ceremony) reminds me how much I miss being in a relationship.
We had planned a life together, just didn't work out that way.
I appreciate I'm a very acquired taste and not likely to change my lifestyle for anyone, so if I have to remain single, so be it
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I sometimes want a relationship, but then I look at the guy a few weeks younger than me at work, he sits next to me, and he's engaged due to be married within two years and I can't think of a bigger headache than sorting all that out.
I've met some great people, but at the moment, and hopefully for a good few years, I'll be happy like that. No desire to settle down or take anyone else's crap on board. I'm a young, free, liberated, educated and sexy woman, why would I want a man to confuse that? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I find the thought of spending my life alone horrible, and hate the though that my branch of the tree, ends with me.
If I wasn't going to continue my bloodline, then why was I even born?
What if you found a woman who was absolutely perfect in every way, made you happy each and every day, fell in love, bought a house, married and planned a family - then found out that for what ever reason either you or her couldn't have children?
That you were happy but couldn't conceive.
What would you do then? Would you question why you were born? Is carrying the bloodline that important that it would screw everything?
Far, far much more to life than procreation x
If I was fortunate enough to find myself with someone where we can both enjoy that kind of bliss together, then I feel my perspective and purpose may change.
Feeling loved and wanted in the world, I'd look to share that by adopting - if life was good enough to me, to give me someone who could end my feelings of loneliness and isolation, then I was see it as my place to pass on than boon, there are many kids out there who'd love a good, loving mum and dad, and if me and my partner could raise a few as our own kids, to become healthy, happy human beings, who are there in my final moments to hold my hand and say 'I love you dad', then I reckon we'd both spent our lives well."
This made me smile x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i wouldnt even know how to do the whole bf/gf thing now. its something ive avoided most of my adult life
think i was 14 when i had my last relationship. we`d talk through friends mostly, spend hours just sat next to eachother doing nothing, and meet up on evenings to kiss behind the big tree in the local park
shit was so much simpler back then |
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"This.
There's such pressure in people to find someone ...OP if you never did find someone, if you spent your life 'alone', would that be such a terrible thing?"
For me it would be a pretty sad thing,I want someone to care about me and visa versa,I want someone to be in my corner when I need support,I want someone to share all the good thing's in life with and the bad thing's. I want someone's warm body next to me in bed or chilling on the settee watching rubbish on the tv,someone for early evening walks in the sun and holding hands and to make plans with. I need affection from a man who I can call my own,I'm learning to live without those thing's,but I don't want to. |
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"This.
There's such pressure in people to find someone ...OP if you never did find someone, if you spent your life 'alone', would that be such a terrible thing?
For me it would be a pretty sad thing,I want someone to care about me and visa versa,I want someone to be in my corner when I need support,I want someone to share all the good thing's in life with and the bad thing's. I want someone's warm body next to me in bed or chilling on the settee watching rubbish on the tv,someone for early evening walks in the sun and holding hands and to make plans with. I need affection from a man who I can call my own,I'm learning to live without those thing's,but I don't want to."
Very honest response.
After my divorce couldn't see myself with anyone else. Spent thirteen happy years on my own. Met my other half on here, total shock, realised I liked being a couple but also like doing things on my own.
Some of the responses on here I'll take with a pinch of salt because come 14 February they'll be singing a different tune. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've learnt you have to love yourself first before expecting others to. Plus I'd sooner be single than in a shit relationship because I didn't want to be alone. I've walked out rather than remain unhappy. I made the right choice. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I find the thought of spending my life alone horrible, and hate the though that my branch of the tree, ends with me.
If I wasn't going to continue my bloodline, then why was I even born?
What if you found a woman who was absolutely perfect in every way, made you happy each and every day, fell in love, bought a house, married and planned a family - then found out that for what ever reason either you or her couldn't have children?
That you were happy but couldn't conceive.
What would you do then? Would you question why you were born? Is carrying the bloodline that important that it would screw everything?
Far, far much more to life than procreation x
If I was fortunate enough to find myself with someone where we can both enjoy that kind of bliss together, then I feel my perspective and purpose may change.
Feeling loved and wanted in the world, I'd look to share that by adopting - if life was good enough to me, to give me someone who could end my feelings of loneliness and isolation, then I was see it as my place to pass on than boon, there are many kids out there who'd love a good, loving mum and dad, and if me and my partner could raise a few as our own kids, to become healthy, happy human beings, who are there in my final moments to hold my hand and say 'I love you dad', then I reckon we'd both spent our lives well.
This made me smile x"
Thankyou, I meant it from the heart x |
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I know what you mean OP. I've wondered many times if I'm just a bit too much of an oddball myself. You should never have to ask yourself, "what's wrong with me?". And I've done that too many times. I don't think I'm a bad guy. Women seem to like me even. But it's never been as anything other than friends. The longer that goes on, the more you start to doubt your own worth. You do start wonder what the problem is.
I can totally understand why people who've been there and done it and are now single, now appreciate their time alone. I get that. But I've personally well and truly had my fill of the single life.
Knowing you have this massive amount of love to give and not being able give it is the ultimate frustration. There's NO outlet for that. There's no hobby you can take up to fill the void or take your mind off it.
I find the loneliness is the worst part. It encroaches on everything you do, cuts you down to the bone. You wake up alone. You go to bed alone. No one to share the good times. No one to share the bad times. No one to share the small things. It leaves an empty unfulfilled feeling inside. It just always feels like there's something missing. That something being a woman to love and of course have her love me back.
I simply refuse to accept that this is how it's always going to be though. I honestly believe there is someone out there for each and everyone of us. All I can do in the meantime is work on being the best person I can be. I've waited this long to find love, I guess I can wait a little longer if I have to. And you just never know what tomorrow will bring... |
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By *ucyfur77Woman
over a year ago
Pleasuretown |
"I know what you mean OP. I've wondered many times if I'm just a bit too much of an oddball myself. You should never have to ask yourself, "what's wrong with me?". And I've done that too many times. I don't think I'm a bad guy. Women seem to like me even. But it's never been as anything other than friends. The longer that goes on, the more you start to doubt your own worth. You do start wonder what the problem is.
I can totally understand why people who've been there and done it and are now single, now appreciate their time alone. I get that. But I've personally well and truly had my fill of the single life.
Knowing you have this massive amount of love to give and not being able give it is the ultimate frustration. There's NO outlet for that. There's no hobby you can take up to fill the void or take your mind off it.
I find the loneliness is the worst part. It encroaches on everything you do, cuts you down to the bone. You wake up alone. You go to bed alone. No one to share the good times. No one to share the bad times. No one to share the small things. It leaves an empty unfulfilled feeling inside. It just always feels like there's something missing. That something being a woman to love and of course have her love me back.
I simply refuse to accept that this is how it's always going to be though. I honestly believe there is someone out there for each and everyone of us. All I can do in the meantime is work on being the best person I can be. I've waited this long to find love, I guess I can wait a little longer if I have to. And you just never know what tomorrow will bring..."
*sending you a virtual hug*
I genuinely don't know dating etiquette these days as I've never been on on *shrugs*  |
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By *ucyfur77Woman
over a year ago
Pleasuretown |
"I know what you mean OP. I've wondered many times if I'm just a bit too much of an oddball myself. You should never have to ask yourself, "what's wrong with me?". And I've done that too many times. I don't think I'm a bad guy. Women seem to like me even. But it's never been as anything other than friends. The longer that goes on, the more you start to doubt your own worth. You do start wonder what the problem is.
I can totally understand why people who've been there and done it and are now single, now appreciate their time alone. I get that. But I've personally well and truly had my fill of the single life.
Knowing you have this massive amount of love to give and not being able give it is the ultimate frustration. There's NO outlet for that. There's no hobby you can take up to fill the void or take your mind off it.
I find the loneliness is the worst part. It encroaches on everything you do, cuts you down to the bone. You wake up alone. You go to bed alone. No one to share the good times. No one to share the bad times. No one to share the small things. It leaves an empty unfulfilled feeling inside. It just always feels like there's something missing. That something being a woman to love and of course have her love me back.
I simply refuse to accept that this is how it's always going to be though. I honestly believe there is someone out there for each and everyone of us. All I can do in the meantime is work on being the best person I can be. I've waited this long to find love, I guess I can wait a little longer if I have to. And you just never know what tomorrow will bring..."
*sending you a virtual hug*
I genuinely don't know dating etiquette these days as I've never been on one *shrugs* |
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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago
Livingston |
I would love to meet someone and settle down, couldn't live with them though, value my private space and "me time" too much.
I miss the "companionship" - someone asking how your day has been, cuddling up to watch a film, getting a cuppa made for me....
Doubt it will happen, but you can but hope x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having been single for a long time, I would only change that for a man who ticks all my boxes.
Yes I would love to find Mr Right. But I won't change what I have for just anyone.
Do I worry about whether I will ever find the one? Sometimes yes. But not for long x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This.
There's such pressure in people to find someone ...OP if you never did find someone, if you spent your life 'alone', would that be such a terrible thing?
For me it would be a pretty sad thing,I want someone to care about me and visa versa,I want someone to be in my corner when I need support,I want someone to share all the good thing's in life with and the bad thing's. I want someone's warm body next to me in bed or chilling on the settee watching rubbish on the tv,someone for early evening walks in the sun and holding hands and to make plans with. I need affection from a man who I can call my own,I'm learning to live without those thing's,but I don't want to.
Very honest response.
After my divorce couldn't see myself with anyone else. Spent thirteen happy years on my own. Met my other half on here, total shock, realised I liked being a couple but also like doing things on my own.
Some of the responses on here I'll take with a pinch of salt because come 14 February they'll be singing a different tune."
I suppose it depends on what type of relationships your used to
Personally I won't feel different come 14th February because I never had anything bought me anyway
I don't miss having somebody to share the good times with and the bad times, I don't miss kisses and cuddles, snuggling up on the sofa watching TV because I never had that anyway
Even when I was married I was alone, I had to sort my own problems out, he had no interest in anything I did or any problems I had
That's not a sob story and please no  its just how my marriage was
It's just people say don't you miss having somebody in your life and the answer is no, I've never had anybody in my life, I may have been married to him but he was never there for me if that makes sense, even when valentine's day came it was just another day
But I suppose if you have had all that and lost it I can understand why you would want it again and also why some may find it hard to accept not everybody does want to be with somebody |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"This.
There's such pressure in people to find someone ...OP if you never did find someone, if you spent your life 'alone', would that be such a terrible thing?
For me it would be a pretty sad thing,I want someone to care about me and visa versa,I want someone to be in my corner when I need support,I want someone to share all the good thing's in life with and the bad thing's. I want someone's warm body next to me in bed or chilling on the settee watching rubbish on the tv,someone for early evening walks in the sun and holding hands and to make plans with. I need affection from a man who I can call my own,I'm learning to live without those thing's,but I don't want to.
Very honest response.
After my divorce couldn't see myself with anyone else. Spent thirteen happy years on my own. Met my other half on here, total shock, realised I liked being a couple but also like doing things on my own.
Some of the responses on here I'll take with a pinch of salt because come 14 February they'll be singing a different tune."
Not me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have always been miss independent. Had relationships but never lived with any of them. Happily single, unhappily single, learned to be happy alone and then became a single parent.
I now find myself in a relationship but I still have my independence, it's not a conventional relationship though and we don't co-habit.
Learn to be happy with what you do have, that's the key.
Then you have the cake, and the icing. Anything else is just cherries! |
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"I know what you mean OP. I've wondered many times if I'm just a bit too much of an oddball myself. You should never have to ask yourself, "what's wrong with me?". And I've done that too many times. I don't think I'm a bad guy. Women seem to like me even. But it's never been as anything other than friends. The longer that goes on, the more you start to doubt your own worth. You do start wonder what the problem is.
I can totally understand why people who've been there and done it and are now single, now appreciate their time alone. I get that. But I've personally well and truly had my fill of the single life.
Knowing you have this massive amount of love to give and not being able give it is the ultimate frustration. There's NO outlet for that. There's no hobby you can take up to fill the void or take your mind off it.
I find the loneliness is the worst part. It encroaches on everything you do, cuts you down to the bone. You wake up alone. You go to bed alone. No one to share the good times. No one to share the bad times. No one to share the small things. It leaves an empty unfulfilled feeling inside. It just always feels like there's something missing. That something being a woman to love and of course have her love me back.
I simply refuse to accept that this is how it's always going to be though. I honestly believe there is someone out there for each and everyone of us. All I can do in the meantime is work on being the best person I can be. I've waited this long to find love, I guess I can wait a little longer if I have to. And you just never know what tomorrow will bring..."
Good for you Howi. It is possible to find something intense and really close on a site like this, even someone to share everything with. But an astrological insight into my own nature hit home one day when it said '.....her lover's physical presence is required.'
I love the intimacy and constancy of co-habitation, my ex and I were in business together too, and that suited me fine. For some people that truly is normal - I've always said put me on a croft with a good man and a good horse and I'll be happy as larry!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i don't think anyone can handle me. i'm fine in small doses and a novelty, but otherwise that is it for them.
i've only had one relationship where the guy truly loved me and didn't use me, coz i actually am nice and giving and supportive and i always get the freaks want me wo should sort their fucking lives out before even considering a relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you think some of us are just absolute odd balls
I do t picture the future with anyone, I genuinely think I'm gonna be single forever as that's how I envision it! I don't want anyone - surely this is normal?
People do end up spending their whole lives alone... Don't they?! I'm think me, 5 cats and yesterday's breakfast on my top.
What a grim vision lol but some people are just meant to be alone, aren't they?! BOLLOCKS to this it'll happen when you least expect it... It's been bloody years now lol "
I keep telling myself this too.....you never know what's around the corner though.
I live in hope! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No not for me I do want a relationship not just yet though I do think about loving someone making them feel special to me each and every single day of there lives but the time being I want to live life experience things have fun make the most out of life while I'm young there will come a time not just yet though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Glad I'm not the only one who enjoys being single but also wonders if they'll be that way forever....
After coming out of a less than ideal LTR I'm really enjoying dancing to the beat of my own drum for once but still occasionally feel the pressure from society and start wondering.... |
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"I have been single all my life too and I like it. I am just too busy with bodybuilding, meal prepping and going to the gym "
I'm 55. I've been single for 30 years and it's great!
I doubt I'll ever have a conventional relationship, the common denominator in all this is me so I'll carry on the same until something changes. |
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"This.
There's such pressure in people to find someone ...OP if you never did find someone, if you spent your life 'alone', would that be such a terrible thing?
For me it would be a pretty sad thing,I want someone to care about me and visa versa,I want someone to be in my corner when I need support,I want someone to share all the good thing's in life with and the bad thing's. I want someone's warm body next to me in bed or chilling on the settee watching rubbish on the tv,someone for early evening walks in the sun and holding hands and to make plans with. I need affection from a man who I can call my own,I'm learning to live without those thing's,but I don't want to.
Very honest response.
After my divorce couldn't see myself with anyone else. Spent thirteen happy years on my own. Met my other half on here, total shock, realised I liked being a couple but also like doing things on my own.
Some of the responses on here I'll take with a pinch of salt because come 14 February they'll be singing a different tune."
February 14th is just one day in the year though., doesnt mean anything much, Your man could be nice and buy you flowers and a card but doesnt mean he isnt screwing other women without you knowing it. My partner doesnt bother about valentines day but he is generous the rest of the year though, especialy aniverserys, birthday and xmas.
Anyway do you really need a man so he can give you something on valentines day when you can buy yourself anything you like with your own money? |
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I'm too used to my own company. I've done the husband and kids thing so don't feel the need to do it again. Company occassionally is nice though and I may feel differently once the last child has left. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm single, and quite happy to be that way after being in a shitty, stifling relationship/marriage for years.
It would take someone very special for me to change my status. |
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"This.
There's such pressure in people to find someone ...OP if you never did find someone, if you spent your life 'alone', would that be such a terrible thing?
For me it would be a pretty sad thing,I want someone to care about me and visa versa,I want someone to be in my corner when I need support,I want someone to share all the good thing's in life with and the bad thing's. I want someone's warm body next to me in bed or chilling on the settee watching rubbish on the tv,someone for early evening walks in the sun and holding hands and to make plans with. I need affection from a man who I can call my own,I'm learning to live without those thing's,but I don't want to.
Very honest response.
After my divorce couldn't see myself with anyone else. Spent thirteen happy years on my own. Met my other half on here, total shock, realised I liked being a couple but also like doing things on my own.
Some of the responses on here I'll take with a pinch of salt because come 14 February they'll be singing a different tune."
I'm glad you said some!
The folk who find such commercial days hard to deal with need to really look into themselves. |
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I didnt mean your man could be screwing other women Miss-Tress i meant any man who is nice on valentines day. Just because someone is nice on valentines day doesnt mean they are nice for the rest of the year. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Although I do have Number One Chap in my life, I am still technically what the conventional world would describe as single. Yes I have to admit at the grand old age of 41, this is not entirely how I envisaged my life.
However.
I have some wonderful, amazing (equally disfunctional) friends who are like a weird little family of support, laughs, hugs, inappropriate humour and healthy piss taking.
It's a shame that I never had the opportunity to do the conventional settling down, family building thing. And my life is far from perfect, but I've seen worse and I'm chuffed to have the crazy little screwed up life that I do have.
I guess I'm just not the type that inspires commitment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Although I do have Number One Chap in my life, I am still technically what the conventional world would describe as single. Yes I have to admit at the grand old age of 41, this is not entirely how I envisaged my life.
However.
I have some wonderful, amazing (equally disfunctional) friends who are like a weird little family of support, laughs, hugs, inappropriate humour and healthy piss taking.
It's a shame that I never had the opportunity to do the conventional settling down, family building thing. And my life is far from perfect, but I've seen worse and I'm chuffed to have the crazy little screwed up life that I do have.
I guess I'm just not the type that inspires commitment. "
Do you see children in your future? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Although I do have Number One Chap in my life, I am still technically what the conventional world would describe as single. Yes I have to admit at the grand old age of 41, this is not entirely how I envisaged my life.
However.
I have some wonderful, amazing (equally disfunctional) friends who are like a weird little family of support, laughs, hugs, inappropriate humour and healthy piss taking.
It's a shame that I never had the opportunity to do the conventional settling down, family building thing. And my life is far from perfect, but I've seen worse and I'm chuffed to have the crazy little screwed up life that I do have.
I guess I'm just not the type that inspires commitment.
Do you see children in your future?"
Christ no, at 41, that ship has very much sailed! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm single and loving it!
I think it very much depends on your personality. If you're the type of person who is naturally social then being single can be hard.
I'm an introvert and a lot of alone time keeps me sane. I did the marriage thing and dont miss it. Living on my own is absolute heaven.
I can't imagine giving it up for anyone, no matter how awesome they might be.
The only thing I miss about a relationship is regular sex. But that's why I'm on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Although I do have Number One Chap in my life, I am still technically what the conventional world would describe as single. Yes I have to admit at the grand old age of 41, this is not entirely how I envisaged my life.
However.
I have some wonderful, amazing (equally disfunctional) friends who are like a weird little family of support, laughs, hugs, inappropriate humour and healthy piss taking.
It's a shame that I never had the opportunity to do the conventional settling down, family building thing. And my life is far from perfect, but I've seen worse and I'm chuffed to have the crazy little screwed up life that I do have.
I guess I'm just not the type that inspires commitment.
Do you see children in your future?
Christ no, at 41, that ship has very much sailed! "
*waves* hello |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Although I do have Number One Chap in my life, I am still technically what the conventional world would describe as single. Yes I have to admit at the grand old age of 41, this is not entirely how I envisaged my life.
However.
I have some wonderful, amazing (equally disfunctional) friends who are like a weird little family of support, laughs, hugs, inappropriate humour and healthy piss taking.
It's a shame that I never had the opportunity to do the conventional settling down, family building thing. And my life is far from perfect, but I've seen worse and I'm chuffed to have the crazy little screwed up life that I do have.
I guess I'm just not the type that inspires commitment.
Do you see children in your future?
Christ no, at 41, that ship has very much sailed! "
Have you given up on it? Or do you simply not feel it's the right choice for you? |
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"I'm single and loving it!
I think it very much depends on your personality. If you're the type of person who is naturally social then being single can be hard."
Yes it is nature not nurture for some. I am usually the life and soul of the party but I don't feel a need for social groups - I describe myself as a 'bonder', the desire for a close, intimate bond is what drives me. I have that bond with my animals often too, we can almost read each others thoughts we are so in tune, some horses are real strong bonders. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have that bond with my animals often too, we can almost read each others thoughts we are so in tune, some horses are real strong bonders. "
Horse have that kind of energy, as do dogs. I saw a horse watching me over a fence a few weeks ago, so I went over and gave it's ears a scratch, you can definitely feel SOMETHING coming from them when you get closer. |
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"I know what you mean OP. I've wondered many times if I'm just a bit too much of an oddball myself. You should never have to ask yourself, "what's wrong with me?". And I've done that too many times. I don't think I'm a bad guy. Women seem to like me even. But it's never been as anything other than friends. The longer that goes on, the more you start to doubt your own worth. You do start wonder what the problem is.
I can totally understand why people who've been there and done it and are now single, now appreciate their time alone. I get that. But I've personally well and truly had my fill of the single life.
Knowing you have this massive amount of love to give and not being able give it is the ultimate frustration. There's NO outlet for that. There's no hobby you can take up to fill the void or take your mind off it.
I find the loneliness is the worst part. It encroaches on everything you do, cuts you down to the bone. You wake up alone. You go to bed alone. No one to share the good times. No one to share the bad times. No one to share the small things. It leaves an empty unfulfilled feeling inside. It just always feels like there's something missing. That something being a woman to love and of course have her love me back.
I simply refuse to accept that this is how it's always going to be though. I honestly believe there is someone out there for each and everyone of us. All I can do in the meantime is work on being the best person I can be. I've waited this long to find love, I guess I can wait a little longer if I have to. And you just never know what tomorrow will bring..."
I feel quite sad reading that. (((Hug)))
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"This.
There's such pressure in people to find someone ...OP if you never did find someone, if you spent your life 'alone', would that be such a terrible thing?
For me it would be a pretty sad thing,I want someone to care about me and visa versa,I want someone to be in my corner when I need support,I want someone to share all the good thing's in life with and the bad thing's. I want someone's warm body next to me in bed or chilling on the settee watching rubbish on the tv,someone for early evening walks in the sun and holding hands and to make plans with. I need affection from a man who I can call my own,I'm learning to live without those thing's,but I don't want to.
Very honest response.
After my divorce couldn't see myself with anyone else. Spent thirteen happy years on my own. Met my other half on here, total shock, realised I liked being a couple but also like doing things on my own.
Some of the responses on here I'll take with a pinch of salt because come 14 February they'll be singing a different tune.
Not me "
No...you're always consistent. But in fairness I did say "some". |
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"I have that bond with my animals often too, we can almost read each others thoughts we are so in tune, some horses are real strong bonders.
Horse have that kind of energy, as do dogs. I saw a horse watching me over a fence a few weeks ago, so I went over and gave it's ears a scratch, you can definitely feel SOMETHING coming from them when you get closer."
Yes, they have huge spirits, and some connect really strongly - it's that deep connection I love so much. My special horse could fix me with his eyes from hundreds of yards away. |
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"This.
There's such pressure in people to find someone ...OP if you never did find someone, if you spent your life 'alone', would that be such a terrible thing?
For me it would be a pretty sad thing,I want someone to care about me and visa versa,I want someone to be in my corner when I need support,I want someone to share all the good thing's in life with and the bad thing's. I want someone's warm body next to me in bed or chilling on the settee watching rubbish on the tv,someone for early evening walks in the sun and holding hands and to make plans with. I need affection from a man who I can call my own,I'm learning to live without those thing's,but I don't want to.
Very honest response.
After my divorce couldn't see myself with anyone else. Spent thirteen happy years on my own. Met my other half on here, total shock, realised I liked being a couple but also like doing things on my own.
Some of the responses on here I'll take with a pinch of salt because come 14 February they'll be singing a different tune.
February 14th is just one day in the year though., doesnt mean anything much, Your man could be nice and buy you flowers and a card but doesnt mean he isnt screwing other women without you knowing it. My partner doesnt bother about valentines day but he is generous the rest of the year though, especialy aniverserys, birthday and xmas.
Anyway do you really need a man so he can give you something on valentines day when you can buy yourself anything you like with your own money?"
You miss my point.
There are people on this thread extolling the joys of being single, yet come Valentines day they post wishing for a partner.
It's the same types that post on bbw threads about loving "real" women and not "toast racks" one minute and petit women threads stating they like women they can throw around the bed not mount piles of blubber.
Just my observations. |
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"This.
There's such pressure in people to find someone ...OP if you never did find someone, if you spent your life 'alone', would that be such a terrible thing?
For me it would be a pretty sad thing,I want someone to care about me and visa versa,I want someone to be in my corner when I need support,I want someone to share all the good thing's in life with and the bad thing's. I want someone's warm body next to me in bed or chilling on the settee watching rubbish on the tv,someone for early evening walks in the sun and holding hands and to make plans with. I need affection from a man who I can call my own,I'm learning to live without those thing's,but I don't want to.
Very honest response.
After my divorce couldn't see myself with anyone else. Spent thirteen happy years on my own. Met my other half on here, total shock, realised I liked being a couple but also like doing things on my own.
Some of the responses on here I'll take with a pinch of salt because come 14 February they'll be singing a different tune.
I'm glad you said some!
The folk who find such commercial days hard to deal with need to really look into themselves. "
I've been here long enough to have seen it with *some* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have that bond with my animals often too, we can almost read each others thoughts we are so in tune, some horses are real strong bonders.
Horse have that kind of energy, as do dogs. I saw a horse watching me over a fence a few weeks ago, so I went over and gave it's ears a scratch, you can definitely feel SOMETHING coming from them when you get closer.
Yes, they have huge spirits, and some connect really strongly - it's that deep connection I love so much. My special horse could fix me with his eyes from hundreds of yards away. "
I've 2 dogs, 1 iv inherited in his twilight yrs, nearly 16, he's adorable, but the connection with my rescue staffy is something special. He brings me peace. |
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"I know what you mean OP. I've wondered many times if I'm just a bit too much of an oddball myself. You should never have to ask yourself, "what's wrong with me?". And I've done that too many times. I don't think I'm a bad guy. Women seem to like me even. But it's never been as anything other than friends. The longer that goes on, the more you start to doubt your own worth. You do start wonder what the problem is.
I can totally understand why people who've been there and done it and are now single, now appreciate their time alone. I get that. But I've personally well and truly had my fill of the single life.
Knowing you have this massive amount of love to give and not being able give it is the ultimate frustration. There's NO outlet for that. There's no hobby you can take up to fill the void or take your mind off it.
I find the loneliness is the worst part. It encroaches on everything you do, cuts you down to the bone. You wake up alone. You go to bed alone. No one to share the good times. No one to share the bad times. No one to share the small things. It leaves an empty unfulfilled feeling inside. It just always feels like there's something missing. That something being a woman to love and of course have her love me back.
I simply refuse to accept that this is how it's always going to be though. I honestly believe there is someone out there for each and everyone of us. All I can do in the meantime is work on being the best person I can be. I've waited this long to find love, I guess I can wait a little longer if I have to. And you just never know what tomorrow will bring..."
This is very well written. THere are many goods bits to being single, The worst bits are that when somebody great happens to you - I have no one to tell! Likewise, when something bad happens, I have no one to tell - that has made me stop and think |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What ??? And have to watch x factor ? Or some shite on the telly ? Im single , no ties , the only place i have to be is work on a monday morning . Apart from that , my time is " my time" ...... Selfish maybe , but after 15 years in a relationship and 3 years of being single , i know which i prefer ... Met some great people on here , lucky enough to ba able to call a few "good friends " Whichever you choose to be , be happy doing it and bloody enjoy it. |
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"What ??? And have to watch x factor ? Or some shite on the telly ? Im single , no ties , the only place i have to be is work on a monday morning . Apart from that , my time is " my time" ...... Selfish maybe , but after 15 years in a relationship and 3 years of being single , i know which i prefer ... Met some great people on here , lucky enough to ba able to call a few "good friends " Whichever you choose to be , be happy doing it and bloody enjoy it. "
Its good to be selfish though no matter what people like to say otherwise. |
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"I have that bond with my animals often too, we can almost read each others thoughts we are so in tune, some horses are real strong bonders.
Horse have that kind of energy, as do dogs. I saw a horse watching me over a fence a few weeks ago, so I went over and gave it's ears a scratch, you can definitely feel SOMETHING coming from them when you get closer.
Yes, they have huge spirits, and some connect really strongly - it's that deep connection I love so much. My special horse could fix me with his eyes from hundreds of yards away. I've 2 dogs, 1 iv inherited in his twilight yrs, nearly 16, he's adorable, but the connection with my rescue staffy is something special. He brings me peace. "
Mine was a troubled soul, so there was never peace, but there was unbridled joy every single day. His dam was very special too, when I lost her, I suddenly realised she was a matriarchal vibe in my life, gave me a deeply caring, protective love - the kind of horse that really kept you safe. Her son was a total narcissist though lol, he was all 'Me, me, me - take, take, take' and could have easily killed me through his recklessness. |
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