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Smoking in front of kids
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If they smoke out side then bit hard etc.. but if they have been smoking in the house with them I would say something and possibly not let them go again x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't let my child go again. It's just blatant ignorance and complete disregard for any child's health. I smoke, and do so outside - but I'd never smoke in a house with a child or in an enclosed area by any child. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It would depend on many factors, I would know something of the parents before they went the first time.
In terms of toxins an occasional visit to a smokers household is less than an afternoon in a traffic jam.
Balance that against the benefit of your child having a social life.
Hard choices to make general statements on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I would definitely say. To allow a child to inhale your filthy exhaled smoke is fucking ridiculous and they are selfish cunts."
Mr _iew stop messing around and get to the point! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Although i am not a smoker and not a fan of the smell.. surely as adults they are entitled to smoke in their own homes and its my child that is a guest in their enviroment??
Im not going to dictate to another adult how they should lead their lives.
I might not think its acceptable, and would probably restrict how often my child visited their home. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My ex n his new girlfriend smoke in the house n my daughter's complained to me for they live with them so I had a word n now they smoke outside. Plus the girls keep their bedroom door shut n the window open. Seems to be working atm. Xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Im a smoker and also have a young son. I always go outside i wouldnt dream of smoking in the house!
Im not sure what i would do in this situation as confronting the parents could end up going badly. I think i would limit the amount of time my child is round that house. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Although i am not a smoker and not a fan of the smell.. surely as adults they are entitled to smoke in their own homes and its my child that is a guest in their enviroment??
Im not going to dictate to another adult how they should lead their lives.
I might not think its acceptable, and would probably restrict how often my child visited their home. "
Hit the nail on the head  |
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"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it"
I would not have let my child go with smokers! You can't tell people what they can't do in their own home but you can control where you send your child.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it
I would not have let my child go with smokers! You can't tell people what they can't do in their own home but you can control where you send your child.
"
Is the right answer! thank you, let sanity reign! |
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"Although i am not a smoker and not a fan of the smell.. surely as adults they are entitled to smoke in their own homes and its my child that is a guest in their enviroment??
Im not going to dictate to another adult how they should lead their lives.
I might not think its acceptable, and would probably restrict how often my child visited their home. "
Exactly this! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Although i am not a smoker and not a fan of the smell.. surely as adults they are entitled to smoke in their own homes and its my child that is a guest in their enviroment??
Im not going to dictate to another adult how they should lead their lives.
I might not think its acceptable, and would probably restrict how often my child visited their home. "
So where are you going to draw the line then?
Some people seem to think that their house is some sacred place where the normal rules of society don't apply.
I might walk around our house naked, but I definitely wouldn't if somebody else's kids were in the house. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To answer the question, I'd not let my child go again. I wouldn't go out of my way to say something as it's not my place to dictate to others what they do in their homes, but if my child was invited to the smoker's house again I'd be honest about why it wouldn't be possible. |
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"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it"
I would do 1 and 2, my 3rd would be 'you fucking illiterate imbalanced morons have some respect for the younger ones and smoke out side'
So sorry for my language if it has offered anyone |
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"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it
I would not have let my child go with smokers! You can't tell people what they can't do in their own home but you can control where you send your child.
Is the right answer! thank you, let sanity reign! "
Sometimes I wonder if I'm in a parallel universe I'm forever stating the bleeding obvious! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Although i am not a smoker and not a fan of the smell.. surely as adults they are entitled to smoke in their own homes and its my child that is a guest in their enviroment??
Im not going to dictate to another adult how they should lead their lives.
I might not think its acceptable, and would probably restrict how often my child visited their home.
So where are you going to draw the line then?
Some people seem to think that their house is some sacred place where the normal rules of society don't apply.
I might walk around our house naked, but I definitely wouldn't if somebody else's kids were in the house. "
But thats YOUR choice to put clothes back on when someone visits.. naturally id like to consider other adults respectful to other people, but im not going to presume they would.
Chances are i would know the adults other wise id not let my child go to a 'strangers' home.. its up to me to take responsibility for where my child goes.
in the scenario given id be aware the parents of my childs friends are smokers and there is a possibility they do smoke in their own home. |
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"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it
I would do 1 and 2, my 3rd would be 'you fucking illiterate imbalanced morons have some respect for the younger ones and smoke out side'
So sorry for my language if it has offered anyone "
why would they be illiterate? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People just take a breath and be cool. There is no need for some of the comments posted as they are in poor taste and the poster should retract and apologise. |
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"Although i am not a smoker and not a fan of the smell.. surely as adults they are entitled to smoke in their own homes and its my child that is a guest in their enviroment??
Im not going to dictate to another adult how they should lead their lives.
I might not think its acceptable, and would probably restrict how often my child visited their home.
So where are you going to draw the line then?
Some people seem to think that their house is some sacred place where the normal rules of society don't apply.
I might walk around our house naked, but I definitely wouldn't if somebody else's kids were in the house.
But thats YOUR choice to put clothes back on when someone visits.. naturally id like to consider other adults respectful to other people, but im not going to presume they would.
Chances are i would know the adults other wise id not let my child go to a 'strangers' home.. its up to me to take responsibility for where my child goes.
in the scenario given id be aware the parents of my childs friends are smokers and there is a possibility they do smoke in their own home. "
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aaaaannnnyhooooooo
back to the topic at hand.....would you say something to the parents of a child who have smoked in front of your kids?
If i had kids, i probably wouldnt but i would perhaps engineer the 'play dates' so that they were at mine or in the open etc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Back to the threads subject
My ex and his girlfriend have just started with thier doctor to stop smoking so I'm wishing them well. They are a good couple. Xxx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Back to the threads subject
My ex and his girlfriend have just started with thier doctor to stop smoking so I'm wishing them well. They are a good couple. Xxx"
Is that champix?
I used them
Amazing
Took me 8 days to stop
Never touch one since
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Although i am not a smoker and not a fan of the smell.. surely as adults they are entitled to smoke in their own homes and its my child that is a guest in their enviroment??
Im not going to dictate to another adult how they should lead their lives.
I might not think its acceptable, and would probably restrict how often my child visited their home.
So where are you going to draw the line then?
Some people seem to think that their house is some sacred place where the normal rules of society don't apply.
I might walk around our house naked, but I definitely wouldn't if somebody else's kids were in the house.
But thats YOUR choice to put clothes back on when someone visits.. naturally id like to consider other adults respectful to other people, but im not going to presume they would.
Chances are i would know the adults other wise id not let my child go to a 'strangers' home.. its up to me to take responsibility for where my child goes.
in the scenario given id be aware the parents of my childs friends are smokers and there is a possibility they do smoke in their own home. "
I don't really understand what you mean by 'your choice'. I'd do it because it's the socially desirable thing to do. That means I sacrifice a degree of my own autonomy in the interests of social cohesion. |
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"It would depend on many factors, I would know something of the parents before they went the first time.
In terms of toxins an occasional visit to a smokers household is less than an afternoon in a traffic jam.
Balance that against the benefit of your child having a social life.
Hard choices to make general statements on."
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ive never let my kids go to anyones house before ive been there and met them first and if they smoke in their house (its their house right or wrong its their decision) i wouldnt let my kids go round and would have their kids to mine instead
Its not up to others to maintain our standard of care it is up to us to make sure our children get that standard of care wherever they are just because they are out of sight doesnt mean they stop being my responsibility |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Back to the threads subject
My ex and his girlfriend have just started with thier doctor to stop smoking so I'm wishing them well. They are a good couple. Xxx
Is that champix?
I used them
Amazing
Took me 8 days to stop
Never touch one since
"
Not sure tbh hopefull they well manage it. Xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a parent ultimately i believe my childrens welbeing lies with me and my ex (their mother).
It is important to know where your kids are and the environment they are in.
We all do things that are not suitable in front of kids but i know that if a friend sends their kids over the responsibility also lies with me to make sure they are safe and looked after |
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"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it"
Smoking inside or out?
I'd say ignore it anyway, an occasional visit to a smokers house is no worse than regularly pushing your child along the path by a main road in its pushchair at exhaust level. If you're concerned that it will influence them in favour of smoking you can point out the dangers but both my parents were avid anti-smokers and both my brother and I took it up as soon as we could. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't need to say anything, knowing my son, he would have already given them a lecture on smoking and all the health risks and left! No joke. He cant stand the smell and gets his own dad to smoke outside his home. |
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"I wouldn't need to say anything, knowing my son, he would have already given them a lecture on smoking and all the health risks and left! No joke. He cant stand the smell and gets his own dad to smoke outside his home. "
Would he go to someone else's house and do that? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't need to say anything, knowing my son, he would have already given them a lecture on smoking and all the health risks and left! No joke. He cant stand the smell and gets his own dad to smoke outside his home.
Would he go to someone else's house and do that?"
I probably would have done something like that as a kid to be fair   |
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"I wouldn't need to say anything, knowing my son, he would have already given them a lecture on smoking and all the health risks and left! No joke. He cant stand the smell and gets his own dad to smoke outside his home.
Would he go to someone else's house and do that?
I probably would have done something like that as a kid to be fair "
Really? Blimey I wouldn't have been that confident as a kid. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I was a kid I had friends whose parents said all kinds of stuff when we had their kids over on play dates - they can't eat this, they can't be around that, etc. Both of my parents smoked and some parents niely asked that they not smoke around their kids. Fair enough and my parents always respected that. I would just nicely talk to the parents. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"my kids would have spoken out they detest it
They would go into someone's house and tell them off?!! Yeah?!! "
thats not what i said - i said spoken out- maybe something like they didnt like it - |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it"
Is this something that happened to your kids... or one of those 'moral dilemmas' to which there are no easy, or right or wrong answers? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't need to say anything, knowing my son, he would have already given them a lecture on smoking and all the health risks and left! No joke. He cant stand the smell and gets his own dad to smoke outside his home.
Would he go to someone else's house and do that?
I probably would have done something like that as a kid to be fair
Really? Blimey I wouldn't have been that confident as a kid."
It wasn't really about confidence. Just a certain aspect of my personality that I'm now more in control of. Think Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory lol |
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"I wouldn't need to say anything, knowing my son, he would have already given them a lecture on smoking and all the health risks and left! No joke. He cant stand the smell and gets his own dad to smoke outside his home.
Would he go to someone else's house and do that?
I probably would have done something like that as a kid to be fair
Really? Blimey I wouldn't have been that confident as a kid.
It wasn't really about confidence. Just a certain aspect of my personality that I'm now more in control of. Think Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory lol "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To answer the question, I'd be having a word with the parents. We don't have kids but we grew up in tight knit communities where everybody knew each other, so that's my perspective. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"my kids would have spoken out they detest it
They would go into someone's house and tell them off?!! Yeah?!! "
My grandson would,he doesn't hold his tongue and speaks very bluntly. You should hear him when people stand by the doors on the bus and block the exit. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it
Is this something that happened to your kids... or one of those 'moral dilemmas' to which there are no easy, or right or wrong answers? "
Just a topic for debate
Didn't realise it would cause a scene |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it"
.I think the first thing I'd ask is how old are the children were talking about?
Then...
I would say do you let your kids eat bacon?.
I ask that because the last scientific evidence showed eating a packet of bacon is about as deadly as smoking 20 a day let alone passive smoking...
Do you let your kids out in the midday sun without sunscreen correctly applied, do you let them climb trees, do you let them cycle on main roads....
Life is quite tricky with protection of children, although I'd want to protect them the best I could I also feel they need to experience life and make choices for themselves... However it would depend on how old the kids are were talking about |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it
Is this something that happened to your kids... or one of those 'moral dilemmas' to which there are no easy, or right or wrong answers?
Just a topic for debate
Didn't realise it would cause a scene "
lol that's the understatement of the year |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't need to say anything, knowing my son, he would have already given them a lecture on smoking and all the health risks and left! No joke. He cant stand the smell and gets his own dad to smoke outside his home.
Would he go to someone else's house and do that?
I probably would have done something like that as a kid to be fair
Really? Blimey I wouldn't have been that confident as a kid.
It wasn't really about confidence. Just a certain aspect of my personality that I'm now more in control of. Think Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory lol "
My son doesn't have social skills due to his additional needs, and is very much like Sheldon!!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it
Is this something that happened to your kids... or one of those 'moral dilemmas' to which there are no easy, or right or wrong answers?
Just a topic for debate
Didn't realise it would cause a scene
lol that's the understatement of the year "
Quite incredible  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"my kids would have spoken out they detest it
They would go into someone's house and tell them off?!! Yeah?!!
My grandson would,he doesn't hold his tongue and speaks very bluntly. You should hear him when people stand by the doors on the bus and block the exit. "
Lol my son is the same, he has no filters as he is autistic and tells it like it is... in fact he came to me earlier and said in a very loud whisper 'mum, that man from next door is smoking in the garden and it stinks!' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"my kids would have spoken out they detest it
They would go into someone's house and tell them off?!! Yeah?!!
My grandson would,he doesn't hold his tongue and speaks very bluntly. You should hear him when people stand by the doors on the bus and block the exit.
Lol my son is the same, he has no filters as he is autistic and tells it like it is... in fact he came to me earlier and said in a very loud whisper 'mum, that man from next door is smoking in the garden and it stinks!' "
My sons the exact same, he used to lecture the man in the corner shop for killing everyone by selling them lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I myself would tell them not to tell me what I can and cannot do in my home I pay the bills on little piece ot England and it's a free world if I want a fag I will have a fag where I choose in my own home |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"my kids would have spoken out they detest it
They would go into someone's house and tell them off?!! Yeah?!!
My grandson would,he doesn't hold his tongue and speaks very bluntly. You should hear him when people stand by the doors on the bus and block the exit.
Lol my son is the same, he has no filters as he is autistic and tells it like it is... in fact he came to me earlier and said in a very loud whisper 'mum, that man from next door is smoking in the garden and it stinks!'
My sons the exact same, he used to lecture the man in the corner shop for killing everyone by selling them lol. "
 |
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"Ive never let my kids go to anyones house before ive been there and met them first and if they smoke in their house (its their house right or wrong its their decision) i wouldnt let my kids go round and would have their kids to mine instead
Its not up to others to maintain our standard of care it is up to us to make sure our children get that standard of care wherever they are just because they are out of sight doesnt mean they stop being my responsibility "
Exactly!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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How old is the hypothetical child? If they're 14/15 I'd say they'd be crapping it if you said you were confronting their friend's parents as chances are they've had a crafty one
|
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"my kids would have spoken out they detest it
They would go into someone's house and tell them off?!! Yeah?!!
My grandson would,he doesn't hold his tongue and speaks very bluntly. You should hear him when people stand by the doors on the bus and block the exit. "
My daughters fiancee decked my partner because of something he said in my house. That was extreme, but I can't imagine saying or doing anything in someone's home.
My dad faced awful racial abuse in the 60s and when I asked him why he didn't respond he said you don't insult someone in their own home.
Never forgot that. |
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"Bitd my Ma stuck me on the bus even if it was full of heavy smokers dragging on B&H's..
The cinema ..pubs...you name it people puffed away....  "
That was the olden days when people sat up in bed in the maternity ward and sparked up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We always make sure the children go outside when we have a ciggie. "
Your house your rules but with all the lingering smoke you might as well spark up with them in there test run in smokers homes show that while the smoke may disipate an not be visible the harmfull chemicals remain in the air for hours after |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We always make sure the children go outside when we have a ciggie.
Your house your rules but with all the lingering smoke you might as well spark up with them in there test run in smokers homes show that while the smoke may disipate an not be visible the harmfull chemicals remain in the air for hours after "
Just so you know im not a smoke nazi or anything i use a vape was a smoker for 16yrs i dont hate the habbit i actually miss it lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We always make sure the children go outside when we have a ciggie.
Your house your rules but with all the lingering smoke you might as well spark up with them in there test run in smokers homes show that while the smoke may disipate an not be visible the harmfull chemicals remain in the air for hours after "
(Whispering) they were kidding
I think |
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"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it
Smoking inside or out?
I'd say ignore it anyway, an occasional visit to a smokers house is no worse than regularly pushing your child along the path by a main road in its pushchair at exhaust level. If you're concerned that it will influence them in favour of smoking you can point out the dangers but both my parents were avid anti-smokers and both my brother and I took it up as soon as we could."
That's interesting,my parent's smoked well my dad was more of a social smoker and rarely does now but us four kid's grew up hating it and non of us smoke |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I smoke outside, as I don't work during school hols I look after a few of my daughters friends even have the odd sleep over helping out my friends and would never dream of smoking inside while the other children were here x |
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"Question
If your child was invited round to stay with their friends and they came home smelling of cigarettes due to the parents smoking in front of them
Would you
1. Say something to the parents
2. Not let them go again
3. Ignore it
Smoking inside or out?
I'd say ignore it anyway, an occasional visit to a smokers house is no worse than regularly pushing your child along the path by a main road in its pushchair at exhaust level. If you're concerned that it will influence them in favour of smoking you can point out the dangers but both my parents were avid anti-smokers and both my brother and I took it up as soon as we could.
That's interesting,my parent's smoked well my dad was more of a social smoker and rarely does now but us four kid's grew up hating it and non of us smoke"
Funny isn't it, but it shows that kids are influenced differently by the same thing (unscienetifically of course). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"my kids would have spoken out they detest it
They would go into someone's house and tell them off?!! Yeah?!!
My grandson would,he doesn't hold his tongue and speaks very bluntly. You should hear him when people stand by the doors on the bus and block the exit.
Lol my son is the same, he has no filters as he is autistic and tells it like it is... in fact he came to me earlier and said in a very loud whisper 'mum, that man from next door is smoking in the garden and it stinks!' "
Yes I'm on the autistic spectrum as well, so know where your son is coming from. I've developed something of a filter over time, but it hasn't been easy lol. |
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Smoking is nothing compared to the dangerous pollution that is around us - it pales into insignificance to it.
I'd know the family where I'm entrusting my kids and would communicate with the parents. They'd almost certainly visit again. |
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