FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I'm only here for the beer?
I'm only here for the beer?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I know there have been other threads about chosen age ranges for having sex on the forums. For some there has to be a cut off point at either end of the scale, for varying reasons and if thats someones choice, then so be it.
I said no thanks to a guy who was way outside of my age range to have sex with (my main aim for being a member of this site).
He asked if we could become 'friends' and just meet up for a drink. I said no thank you to that as well, because I have friends I fulfill that need with. He has just written again saying that I should just forget all of my boundaries and meet - adding that after all, he would be the one paying (for the drink I assume). So the only reason he saw for my reluctance to meet up was his perception that I wasn't one to stand my own round. How bloody crass of him.
How many of you have friends that would be so rude as to dangle an 'I'm paying' carrot to persuade you to meet up? They would sharp become an ex-friend if they only believed I meet up for a free drink from them. Of course we treat friends when we know they're skint and they do the same if we are - but thats what friends do. Any other situation its 'Going Dutch' every single time.
I'm not naive - I know blokes will try it on to get you to step out of your comfort zone in the hope that once you met them in the flesh you will change your mind and leap into bed with them.
Also there are some very nice men (within my preferred age range) that I have met platonically for lunch or had over to mine for a meal and we had a great sex-free time on equal footing where no friendship has developed - we just enjoyed the moment.
I am comfortable socially with men around my own age one on one, even though I get on well with men of all ages in different social situations. But I have no desire to sit in a pub/restaurant like the odd couple with a guy who could be mistaken for my son That's my choice. I do not doubt anyones sexual prowess or experience at any young age - after all I have been there and know what I was capable of but I just find thinking of the very young in a sexual situation slightly taboo for my own personal comfort. I like older men and thats my taste.
This particular young mans persuasion technique made me feel a little bit of a whore - and a VERY cheap one at that. I don't even drink alcohol.
If that wasn't an example of the impetuous nature of youth or immaturity then I'm not sure what to put his ill-thought behaviour down to.
During your time on the site, has anyone made you feel cheap or that they're somehow 'doing you a favour' by offering to meet up in this manner or one similar? |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
so me you and that drink is off then... 
seriously though, if someone says no then that should be it and people should be able to accept that...
if he knew that he was outside your age range to begin with then it sounds as if he was trying to chance his arm and then use that as an excuse..
but to be honest it sounds like he is trying to make you feel guilty,
not worth it chick... concentrate of those who interest you... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i think my time on this site would be over if anyone made me feel cheap !!! i just dismiss the guys down on their knees , i know who i want to meet , no one can persuade me otherwise . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We're friends Fabio - I will pay xxxx
You know I wouldn't give these types a second thought but you're right about the guilt trip - I feel this whenever I say no thanks which is ok because I wouldn't like to be a thoughtless automaton in anything I participate in xx That doesn't stop me from sticking to my guns though. How are you for w/c 11th April  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Never have that problem, as I state in my profile that I am financially independent.
I am not so desparate as to let peeps sponge me off though.  "
Thats an interesting reply Pearl because for a split second I thought he's sounding desperate now and there are plenty of women who would take advantage of his 'im in the chair' offer. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never have that problem, as I state in my profile that I am financially independent.
I am not so desparate as to let peeps sponge me off though. "
Lend us a quid then xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never have that problem, as I state in my profile that I am financially independent.
I am not so desparate as to let peeps sponge me off though.
Lend us a quid then xx "
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For service rendered? How about 1p?!
MWAH! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Impetuosity of youth? Chancing his arm? Pushing his luck?
Don't take it badly Jecherche. I understand where you are coming from but turn it on it's head. A younger man willing to pay the earth [well at least the price of a Babycham] just to be in your company.
As for me. I dream of being made to feel cheap  Mine's a Guiness and a bag of scratchings   |
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"Impetuosity of youth? Chancing his arm? Pushing his luck?
Don't take it badly Jecherche. I understand where you are coming from but turn it on it's head. A younger man willing to pay the earth [well at least the price of a Babycham] just to be in your company.
As for me. I dream of being made to feel cheap Mine's a Guiness and a bag of scratchings "
half or a pint? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Impetuosity of youth? Chancing his arm? Pushing his luck?
Don't take it badly Jecherche. I understand where you are coming from but turn it on it's head. A younger man willing to pay the earth [well at least the price of a Babycham] just to be in your company.
As for me. I dream of being made to feel cheap Mine's a Guiness and a bag of scratchings
half or a pint?"
Swift half. I really am cheap  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never been interested in anyone who proclaim to be solvent/good looking/great in bed, as there is only room for one egomaniac in my world! 
Brilliant, I'm nicking that lol!!! "
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I admire my own brilliance from time to time! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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we had a young guy message us saying he would be "willing to meet us" if we either paid his train fare or got a hotel within walking distance of his house! he felt that as he was well endowed we should leap at this offer! i replied grow up and get over yourself! x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we had a young guy message us saying he would be "willing to meet us" if we either paid his train fare or got a hotel within walking distance of his house! he felt that as he was well endowed we should leap at this offer! i replied grow up and get over yourself! x"
He would have to have been endowed with a detachable solid gold cock. Cheeky young shaver. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Now you see I've never been in this kind of situation as any one outside my age limit is automatically deleted. I don't enter into conversation with anyone I have no intention of meeting.
If you start to answer they're going to assume they have a chance, as it could be seen as a mixed message. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"we had a young guy message us saying he would be "willing to meet us" if we either paid his train fare or got a hotel within walking distance of his house! he felt that as he was well endowed we should leap at this offer! i replied grow up and get over yourself! x"
oh lord!!!
Ive written this in another thread but one guy offered to meet me if I would buy him a new pair of trainers as his old ones would show him up on a meet I think that will haunt me for the rest of my days! |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
I would always pay my way - so it would not be a reason to meet somebody. Neither would the statement that they are staying in a particular hotel on a particular night. I meet somebody (of a suitable age!!) if and when I want to meet them and personally I would choose somebody within my age range give or take 10 years either side. Not set in concrete but I would not like to be seen as a "cougar" |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Now you see I've never been in this kind of situation as any one outside my age limit is automatically deleted. I don't enter into conversation with anyone I have no intention of meeting.
If you start to answer they're going to assume they have a chance, as it could be seen as a mixed message."
Have to agree in most circumstances.. but when I receive a polite non one liner I have to write and say thanks but no thanks. If he considers that a mixed message then nothing much I can do about it - but I dont play ping pong just block if they choose to reply. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we had a young guy message us saying he would be "willing to meet us" if we either paid his train fare or got a hotel within walking distance of his house! he felt that as he was well endowed we should leap at this offer! i replied grow up and get over yourself! x
oh lord!!!
Ive written this in another thread but one guy offered to meet me if I would buy him a new pair of trainers as his old ones would show him up on a meet I think that will haunt me for the rest of my days!"
Was it Rab. C. Nesbitt or wee Burney |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Now you see I've never been in this kind of situation as any one outside my age limit is automatically deleted. I don't enter into conversation with anyone I have no intention of meeting.
If you start to answer they're going to assume they have a chance, as it could be seen as a mixed message.
Have to agree in most circumstances.. but when I receive a polite non one liner I have to write and say thanks but no thanks. If he considers that a mixed message then nothing much I can do about it - but I dont play ping pong just block if they choose to reply."
Bugger. That's on my list of preferences. Ladies who like table tennis |
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