FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Such Hate and Judgement
Such Hate and Judgement
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Over the years i have come to realise that there is so much hate also so many people judging people over their likes and how they look.
Judgement on looks and interests -
many people have talked about this giving positives and negatives, and many of us have different opinions about it.
to me people shouldnt judge someone on their looks, age, what they wear what they are into and if they have a good profile or not.
in my eyes you cant understand and you cant get read a person by their profile.
a profile is to put what you want and want your looking for + a bit about yourself and i use a bit loosely as if we all wrote a profile and everything we loved or wanted to do then it would be to long and we would lose interest.
we humans love convos and we loved getting to know people.
However there is a lot of us that would judge someone on their profile and think that if they are looking for something or want something it should be on there.
have a think to yourself maybe that person doesnt feel comfty about it so they prefer letting it out once they gotten to know someone. Not all of us are comfty with our bodies our mines and what we like because we are always afraid of being judged of being told thats disgusting or your a freak.
so we hid ourself to the right person comes along.
so to me i put as much as i can on a profile and as much as i am comfty with then i open up over time.
i feel that people are to quick to judge and that perfection is a must and sadly in this world not one single human not one of else is perfection.
we all have things wrong with us even if we dont know of it yet.
enough talked about topic is age.
no in my eyes age shouldnt matter if you like/love the person and your happy with each other however what seems to happen a lot is 2 people will get talking and find they match but then one of them will say i am sorry though your to old/young for me.
this annoys me as us as a human race seem to pick and choose some of us will write on our profile looking for people 25-35 for example and one person who is in that age range comes along and is told that he is to young /old however they are the same age range the person how on their profile.
others like i said above like what the person is into but will also mention age.
its like when you sit and think about it more people would be happy with their lives and there would be more relationships/ friendships and fun in this world if we wasnt so harsh to judge.
another talked about topic is looks.
the favourite saying is your not my type.
now i understand the laws of attraction and other things however i believe in a fair world and a fair trial .
what do i mean by this? well like i mention above about judging someone you dont know who could be that person your loving for in personality but you just been to quick to judge on how they look.
i dont get in this world why people cant take the time to get to know people for who they are, before the internet and before us humans starting being so picky
the human race was never like this we learned to work with each other. accept each other and fell in love with their personality.
where is that today when people take one look at your profile and make judgement on who you are what you look like and what you like.
us humans should be ok with who we are and what we like and look like but we dont we pick fault at ourself for being to geeky to fat to ugly to stupid because thats how other people see us .
i would like to know your opinions in a nice way
the last thing i want is for everyone to have a go at each other.
i hope in the future us humans can learn to accept each other and learn from one another as well.
i am sorry for my poor grammer and spelling as i am part dyslexia/ dispaxia yet another trait that people look down on people so harshly (: |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
So what you are saying is everyone you want to get to know should get to know you in case you turn out to be what they want?
You shouldn't have to write a profile and your height, build, looks etc shouldn't matter because they don't know you until you've chatted or maybe met? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So what you are saying is everyone you want to get to know should get to know you in case you turn out to be what they want?
You shouldn't have to write a profile and your height, build, looks etc shouldn't matter because they don't know you until you've chatted or maybe met?"
what i am saying is that a profile is not everything people should take the time to get to know someone before judging them, in a way this is why forums are good to find people with slimar interests, but some of us are not comfy chatting in forums so we prefer one to one chats, and that people should be honest about how they feel , if someone says your not your type think to yourself not you lol as its just a example but think based his/her looks and see what this person has to offer if they are then boring etc then you say the blunt harsh truth sorry its not working at ... etc i feel people have a right to know why they are being judged |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So basically your not getting any meets. I reckon everyone should be attracted to chubby middle aged average women"
who said i wasnt getting meets?
i am just stateing how i feel and thats why i said we shouldnt start on each other i am curious to see what people feel about this as it talked about a lot on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So basically your not getting any meets. I reckon everyone should be attracted to chubby middle aged average women"
I LOVE middle aged chubby women ..I prefer the worg "curvy" though
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So basically your not getting any meets. I reckon everyone should be attracted to chubby middle aged average women
I LOVE middle aged chubby women ..I prefer the worg "curvy" though
"
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"i feel people have a right to know why they are being judged"
People don't generally have the time to get into a lengthy conversation with every single person who contacts them.
The nature of this site is always going to be a little bit superficial, it's just something that comes with internet dating.
If you want the chance to get to know people, it's best to go to social events. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So what you are saying is everyone you want to get to know should get to know you in case you turn out to be what they want?
You shouldn't have to write a profile and your height, build, looks etc shouldn't matter because they don't know you until you've chatted or maybe met?
what i am saying is that a profile is not everything people should take the time to get to know someone before judging them, in a way this is why forums are good to find people with slimar interests, but some of us are not comfy chatting in forums so we prefer one to one chats, and that people should be honest about how they feel , if someone says your not your type think to yourself not you lol as its just a example but think based his/her looks and see what this person has to offer if they are then boring etc then you say the blunt harsh truth sorry its not working at ... etc i feel people have a right to know why they are being judged"
So what you are saying is I should met everyone who wants to meet me, just to see if they are right for me? Fuck that!! Where do I sign up to be judgemental on what someone puts on their profile and how they converse with me. That label suits me just fine thanks. |
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By *4veMan
over a year ago
Nuneaton |
Isn't a site like this just the wrong place for what you want then?
It's a faceless Internet site where people lost what they are and what they want just like a shopping list and other people see if they match from an entirely sexual point of _iew.
If you want to meet people face to face and have a chance for your personality to shine through without being judged by your appearance or likes then go to the pub and start talking to strangers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Like it or not the ratios of men to on here mean that, particularly for us fellas, our profile is our 'shop window' and people do make judgement calls on it. It's the initial hook that hopefully starts a conversation and people can open up from there.
When there's a lot of guys competing on here you can't blame anyone for choosing the profiles that appeal to them both visually / aesthetically and intellectually - of course people are going to gravitate to those with similar interests rather than those that are into different things than them.
In real life it would be great if we could all get on and everyone loved each other but life isn't like that so concentrate on those that appeal to you and pass by those that don't |
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I think you need to chill...
Of course people have preferences.
I presume you wouldn't have sex with anyone.
Judging by the posts on the forums ... you maybe should be grateful that you at least get replies. Many simply ignore or block.
Sadly this thread may not help...
I won't offer profile advice ad you haven't asked for it.
Nita |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
There was an interesting snippet on Radio 2 today when I was driving home, about online dating. One of the points was to date the 'maybes', that is, people who match your top criteria but they're not a 100% fit.
The problem is, we're not online dating. We're considering people to do something very intimate with, and if there is something on the profile that puts me off, I'm not going to go through days or weeks of messaging just for the same result. I want a profile to wow me, and that means writing it well, clearly, and having some tantalising pics. If I don't see something I want in their shop window, why would I enter the shop? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Basically you're another young lad that doesn't see why ALL older women shouldn't meet you and that some of us dare to have a preference "
i didnt say about older women in that whole thing?
i am suggesting that people are to quick to judge on age fair enough judge once you got to know them if they really arent for you and a lot of people inc myself dont contact people who are looking for my age range however that said like i mention some people put looking for 25-35 men/women this happeneds with both males and females and they tell you your to young or to old yet for eg. the person would be lets say 32 so the right age range and yet still shot down, without no reason? |
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"So basically your not getting any meets. I reckon everyone should be attracted to chubby middle aged average women
who said i wasnt getting meets?
i am just stateing how i feel and thats why i said we shouldnt start on each other i am curious to see what people feel about this as it talked about a lot on here" well if you where getting meets why would you put such a thread up. So everyone that
mails us we should converse with just incase we miss out on a shag for life. Then if we dont like them give them a run down of why.
Well im here for a good time and tbere is plenty of people i am attracted to without having to give people a chance that im not attracted to |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Ah, OP, so you will fuck anything?
Attraction matters to most."
yet again replying to people did i say anyhing?
this isnt even about me its just what i have noticed over time this happens to many people |
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I judge whether or not I want to get to know someone more or not by their profile, their message and their forum contributions if any. I I decide I'd like to know them more, then I read the next few messages and then judge on that whether I want to get to know them more.
What else can I judge on, seeing as I don't know them and I'm not wasting my time having a meet with everyone. It would be a full time job, expensive and likely very boring a lot of the time.
Your attitude is extremely unrealistic and very judgemental yourself. I haven't even got as far as looking at the profile, yet in my head is a picture of what it will be like. |
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I decide by who is closest followed by who I find most sexually appealing. This might be due to there sexual wants or it might be a physical attraction. It changes for me. There are some I dint bother contacting as you know the chances of a response are slim to none. |
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
"Ah, OP, so you will fuck anything?
Attraction matters to most.
yet again replying to people did i say anyhing?
this isnt even about me its just what i have noticed over time this happens to many people"
Sometimes when digging a generalisation it good to put the shovel down. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"How do you decide on which people your going to message? Or do you message every single person on the site? "
yes you look on someones profile and you make that decision to contact them no i dont message everyone , and before someone says yet you just did the judgeing there i am saying if i like the profile i will then get to know that person more, and i will not make a judgment until i have as least talked to them for a bit, some of us decide that someone is not worth getting to know , and like i said in my post if we really outlined what we was after it would be to long thats what messages are about (: |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't have time to get to know all the faceless people with no profile text. I already spend time getting to know people who have pics and text and don't meet everyone I talk to. It's not a first come first served site. |
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Now I've read it and there's not a chance in hell I would give you "a chance" as it would be a complete waste of my time, and yours.
No hate or negative judgement necessary, just total incompatibility.
I think you're on the wrong site. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you decide on which people your going to message? Or do you message every single person on the site?
yes you look on someones profile and you make that decision to contact them no i dont message everyone , and before someone says yet you just did the judgeing there i am saying if i like the profile i will then get to know that person more, and i will not make a judgment until i have as least talked to them for a bit, some of us decide that someone is not worth getting to know , and like i said in my post if we really outlined what we was after it would be to long thats what messages are about (:"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ah, OP, so you will fuck anything?
Attraction matters to most.
yet again replying to people did i say anyhing?
this isnt even about me its just what i have noticed over time this happens to many people"
You explained your position and said you wanted to know people's opinions. I gave mine. Now you indicate otherwise. I am confused. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Ah, OP, so you will fuck anything?
Attraction matters to most.
yet again replying to people did i say anyhing?
this isnt even about me its just what i have noticed over time this happens to many people
You explained your position and said you wanted to know people's opinions. I gave mine. Now you indicate otherwise. I am confused."
no you asked a question and i replied about fucking just anyone
i didnt start and i wont be either (: |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"How do you decide on which people your going to message? Or do you message every single person on the site?
yes you look on someones profile and you make that decision to contact them no i dont message everyone , and before someone says yet you just did the judgeing there i am saying if i like the profile i will then get to know that person more, and i will not make a judgment until i have as least talked to them for a bit, some of us decide that someone is not worth getting to know , and like i said in my post if we really outlined what we was after it would be to long thats what messages are about (:"
You use the site your way, I'll use it my way. Then we're both happy. |
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By *lla_maiWoman
over a year ago
staffordshire |
"How do you decide on which people your going to message? Or do you message every single person on the site?
yes you look on someones profile and you make that decision to contact them no i dont message everyone , and before someone says yet you just did the judgeing there i am saying if i like the profile i will then get to know that person more, and i will not make a judgment until i have as least talked to them for a bit, some of us decide that someone is not worth getting to know , and like i said in my post if we really outlined what we was after it would be to long thats what messages are about (:"
But you make the judgement that certain peoples profiles are not worth contacting! So you decide who to message through making judgements, is that not contradicting what you said previously that people shouldnt judge? If you decide to message based on their profile then people are likely to do the same based on yours. Its their choice whether to respond or not. If they read and think they dont sound like someone I would click with, why then spend time messaging just to say no. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"How do you decide on which people your going to message? Or do you message every single person on the site?
yes you look on someones profile and you make that decision to contact them no i dont message everyone , and before someone says yet you just did the judgeing there i am saying if i like the profile i will then get to know that person more, and i will not make a judgment until i have as least talked to them for a bit, some of us decide that someone is not worth getting to know , and like i said in my post if we really outlined what we was after it would be to long thats what messages are about (:
But you make the judgement that certain peoples profiles are not worth contacting! So you decide who to message through making judgements, is that not contradicting what you said previously that people shouldnt judge? If you decide to message based on their profile then people are likely to do the same based on yours. Its their choice whether to respond or not. If they read and think they dont sound like someone I would click with, why then spend time messaging just to say no. "
like with the comments i judge based on location first hence why i dont contact everyone i also dont message people who havent put anything on their profile. yes i said dont judge by profile however if that person cant even put a few words then i am wanting to talk to someone i can start a convo on and then we didnt get on etc then i would move on, however what i see and hear from people is that they are judged because they are to ugly or not the right age that i cant stand if someone messages asking about age and they repsond for eg. the reason i am judgeing on your age is because of this and you understand each other that is a fine but a lot of people dont explain why they judge someone.
i just feel even since starting this thread people arent understanding and are judgeing me for putting this up? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ah, OP, so you will fuck anything?
Attraction matters to most.
yet again replying to people did i say anyhing?
this isnt even about me its just what i have noticed over time this happens to many people
You explained your position and said you wanted to know people's opinions. I gave mine. Now you indicate otherwise. I am confused.
no you asked a question and i replied about fucking just anyone
i didnt start and i wont be either (:"
What is that about?
Of course people judge others. If I did not make a judgement on someone, I might end up in bed with Ian Brady.
Making a judgement is not about hate. It is about deciding whether you might like someone.
We all make judgements daily. It is part of human interaction. |
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By *lla_maiWoman
over a year ago
staffordshire |
In your own words
"However there is a lot of us that would judge someone on their profile and think that if they are looking for something or want something it should be on there.
have a think to yourself maybe that person doesnt feel comfty about it so they prefer letting it out once they gotten to know someone."
So maybe people just arent "comfy" with writing about themselves on their profile, yet are still judged
Its all about peoples "preferences"
Sorry had to be said |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP. This site is primarily a No Strings Attached sex site. No Strings, which means nobody has an obligation to you and you have no obligations to them. They owe you nothing, and you owe them nothing. People judge. It's up to you whether that judgement is acceptable the same as you are at liberty to judge them.
There's not really much more to it.
If the site isn't working for you, it's up to you to alter your expectations, or move on to a site that does work. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So what you are saying is everyone you want to get to know should get to know you in case you turn out to be what they want?
You shouldn't have to write a profile and your height, build, looks etc shouldn't matter because they don't know you until you've chatted or maybe met?
what i am saying is that a profile is not everything people should take the time to get to know someone before judging them, in a way this is why forums are good to find people with slimar interests, but some of us are not comfy chatting in forums so we prefer one to one chats, and that people should be honest about how they feel , if someone says your not your type think to yourself not you lol as its just a example but think based his/her looks and see what this person has to offer if they are then boring etc then you say the blunt harsh truth sorry its not working at ... etc i feel people have a right to know why they are being judged"
But i dont need to get to know somone if i dont find then attravtive |
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"So what you are saying is everyone you want to get to know should get to know you in case you turn out to be what they want?
You shouldn't have to write a profile and your height, build, looks etc shouldn't matter because they don't know you until you've chatted or maybe met?"
*Bows to your perseverance* couldn't read all of the op, my head began to hurt. Thanks for the precise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i don't actually have a type of guy but some i will find more attractive by looks than others. that's a given.
i kind of get what you're saying, all of it that there's more to people than first appearances basically, and this is true.
but this site is based on sexual attraction, that is the basis of all interaction on here. it's not a dating site, nor friendship one, in the way that other interactions are.
not saying you can't use this site for that (i am looking for a relationship myself) but realistically i accept that people here are mainly looking for sex, sexual encounters, and friendships based on sexual compatibility. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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and this isn't hate though. it is how all interaction works basically. people will either be interested in interacting with you or not, dependent on the impression you make on them.
it can be fairly shallow but that is the swinging/casual dating environment in general. |
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People make judgements on all sorts, and people get judged on all sorts. It's the entitlement angle I am not particularly keen on within that judgement criteria, or the 'I'm right, you're wrong' perspective. Thick skins all round but choose wisely |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not a single pic on the ops profile , wish I'd checked before reading his post .
Having said that , I should have known from the nature of the post that there wouldn't be one .
Before we even reply to anyone on here we look at this pics ..... No attraction , no reply |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"So what you are saying is everyone you want to get to know should get to know you in case you turn out to be what they want?
You shouldn't have to write a profile and your height, build, looks etc shouldn't matter because they don't know you until you've chatted or maybe met?
what i am saying is that a profile is not everything people should take the time to get to know someone before judging them, in a way this is why forums are good to find people with slimar interests, but some of us are not comfy chatting in forums so we prefer one to one chats, and that people should be honest about how they feel , if someone says your not your type think to yourself not you lol as its just a example but think based his/her looks and see what this person has to offer if they are then boring etc then you say the blunt harsh truth sorry its not working at ... etc i feel people have a right to know why they are being judged"
How much time do you think most of us have to get to know people on here?
We chose who we think we are most likely to click with based on profiles and photos. That's what they are for. It's up to site members to create a profile that represents them and without one they are unlikely to get interest from compatible people.
I don't have time to play 20 questions with everyone in my local area, not even with everyone in my local area interested in me. I'm certainly not trying because you think it's unfair.
The people on this site looking for meets are primarily looking for NSA meets, not a relationship. We decide based on the information on profiles because we don't usually need to know people in depth.
If your profile/photos/messages do not appeal to people and attract their interest, you will get few, if any, meets.
It's unfortunate that isn't how you want the site to work but what you want isn't practical or possible. You can fit in with how the site works or not, it's up to you. You won't change how the majority of people do things to suit you.
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"So basically your not getting any meets. I reckon everyone should be attracted to chubby middle aged average women"
I demand everyone I like meets me for sex before deciding if they're interested or not. I could be their best ever shag and it's only fair I get the chance to prove it without being judged first. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"How do you decide on which people your going to message? Or do you message every single person on the site?
yes you look on someones profile and you make that decision to contact them no i dont message everyone , and before someone says yet you just did the judgeing there i am saying if i like the profile i will then get to know that person more, and i will not make a judgment until i have as least talked to them for a bit, some of us decide that someone is not worth getting to know , and like i said in my post if we really outlined what we was after it would be to long thats what messages are about (:
But you make the judgement that certain peoples profiles are not worth contacting! So you decide who to message through making judgements, is that not contradicting what you said previously that people shouldnt judge? If you decide to message based on their profile then people are likely to do the same based on yours. Its their choice whether to respond or not. If they read and think they dont sound like someone I would click with, why then spend time messaging just to say no.
like with the comments i judge based on location first hence why i dont contact everyone i also dont message people who havent put anything on their profile. yes i said dont judge by profile however if that person cant even put a few words then i am wanting to talk to someone i can start a convo on and then we didnt get on etc then i would move on, however what i see and hear from people is that they are judged because they are to ugly or not the right age that i cant stand if someone messages asking about age and they repsond for eg. the reason i am judgeing on your age is because of this and you understand each other that is a fine but a lot of people dont explain why they judge someone.
i just feel even since starting this thread people arent understanding and are judgeing me for putting this up?"
Do you have any idea what happens, usually, when a man (or maybe a woman, I don't know), is given a reason for being told no?
It's one of two things.
1. They take it as an excuse to try to persuade you it could still work. They won't accept the no. Not giving a reason prevents this.
2. They become abusive, feeling criticised.
Giving reasons, depending on the reason, is usually not a good idea.
Besides, I don't owe anyone an explanation. I'd rather say no thanks than tell them they are physically unattractive to me. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"the human race was never like this we learned to work with each other. accept each other and fell in love with their personality."
You do realise this site is not intended for people looking for love?
Sure, a few people find love here and some are looking but that isn't what the site is mainly meant for.
"where is that today when people take one look at your profile and make judgement on who you are what you look like and what you like."
Further on you admitted you decide whom to contact based on their profile. Even if you get to know them after that, you are still doing exactly what you are criticising by judging initially on the profile.
You're not getting to know people whose profiles do not appeal to you, which is exactly what you are telling us we should do!
Just admit you think everyone you want to meet should give you a chance but you can have no obligation to give a chance to people who want to meet you.
Yeah, that'll happen! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you're not going to judge someone by what they write on their profile there is no point having anything on the profile. It's there to attract like minded people. |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
i looked at your age on your profile..i didnt read it, you are 26 only a couple of years older than my kids...so i wouldnt meet you. end of.
however, if you came and talked on threads in the forums, or i met you in a club i would say hi and not ignore you. im inclusive, but i have my preferences and reasons not to meet others.
i do get to know my lovers, however people use this site differently and thats ok too. Do your thing. stay yourself, but if its not fun, dont do it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Basically you're another young lad that doesn't see why ALL older women shouldn't meet you and that some of us dare to have a preference
i didnt say about older women in that whole thing?
i am suggesting that people are to quick to judge on age fair enough judge once you got to know them if they really arent for you and a lot of people inc myself dont contact people who are looking for my age range however that said like i mention some people put looking for 25-35 men/women this happeneds with both males and females and they tell you your to young or to old yet for eg. the person would be lets say 32 so the right age range and yet still shot down, without no reason?"
No you didn't but you do mention age and the problem is that your age group are constantly moaning about their age, older women whom they love and how do they meet them.
As to your comment:-
'lets say 32 so the right age range and yet still shot down, without no reason'
How do you know they've no reason? Did you ask them? Its about attraction, perhaps they weren't attracted to them, no big deal it happens but you seem to be suggesting that they should meet them as they are in the right age range |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"and the best advice is to live your own life and enjoy it (:"
OP maybe you should just accept that we all follow your best advice.....and good advice it is |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Basically you're another young lad that doesn't see why ALL older women shouldn't meet you and that some of us dare to have a preference
i didnt say about older women in that whole thing?
i am suggesting that people are to quick to judge on age fair enough judge once you got to know them if they really arent for you and a lot of people inc myself dont contact people who are looking for my age range however that said like i mention some people put looking for 25-35 men/women this happeneds with both males and females and they tell you your to young or to old yet for eg. the person would be lets say 32 so the right age range and yet still shot down, without no reason?
No you didn't but you do mention age and the problem is that your age group are constantly moaning about their age, older women whom they love and how do they meet them.
As to your comment:-
'lets say 32 so the right age range and yet still shot down, without no reason'
How do you know they've no reason? Did you ask them? Its about attraction, perhaps they weren't attracted to them, no big deal it happens but you seem to be suggesting that they should meet them as they are in the right age range"
Perhaps they're in the right age range on their profile but act like a teenager... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Basically you're another young lad that doesn't see why ALL older women shouldn't meet you and that some of us dare to have a preference
i didnt say about older women in that whole thing?
i am suggesting that people are to quick to judge on age fair enough judge once you got to know them if they really arent for you and a lot of people inc myself dont contact people who are looking for my age range however that said like i mention some people put looking for 25-35 men/women this happeneds with both males and females and they tell you your to young or to old yet for eg. the person would be lets say 32 so the right age range and yet still shot down, without no reason?
No you didn't but you do mention age and the problem is that your age group are constantly moaning about their age, older women whom they love and how do they meet them.
As to your comment:-
'lets say 32 so the right age range and yet still shot down, without no reason'
How do you know they've no reason? Did you ask them? Its about attraction, perhaps they weren't attracted to them, no big deal it happens but you seem to be suggesting that they should meet them as they are in the right age range
Perhaps they're in the right age range on their profile but act like a teenager... " |
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"Over the years i have come to realise that there is so much hate also so many people judging people over their likes and how they look.
Judgement on looks and interests -
many people have talked about this giving positives and negatives, and many of us have different opinions about it.
to me people shouldnt judge someone on their looks, age, what they wear what they are into and if they have a good profile or not.
in my eyes you cant understand and you cant get read a person by their profile.
a profile is to put what you want and want your looking for + a bit about yourself and i use a bit loosely as if we all wrote a profile and everything we loved or wanted to do then it would be to long and we would lose interest.
we humans love convos and we loved getting to know people.
However there is a lot of us that would judge someone on their profile and think that if they are looking for something or want something it should be on there.
have a think to yourself maybe that person doesnt feel comfty about it so they prefer letting it out once they gotten to know someone. Not all of us are comfty with our bodies our mines and what we like because we are always afraid of being judged of being told thats disgusting or your a freak.
so we hid ourself to the right person comes along.
so to me i put as much as i can on a profile and as much as i am comfty with then i open up over time.
i feel that people are to quick to judge and that perfection is a must and sadly in this world not one single human not one of else is perfection.
we all have things wrong with us even if we dont know of it yet.
enough talked about topic is age.
no in my eyes age shouldnt matter if you like/love the person and your happy with each other however what seems to happen a lot is 2 people will get talking and find they match but then one of them will say i am sorry though your to old/young for me.
this annoys me as us as a human race seem to pick and choose some of us will write on our profile looking for people 25-35 for example and one person who is in that age range comes along and is told that he is to young /old however they are the same age range the person how on their profile.
others like i said above like what the person is into but will also mention age.
its like when you sit and think about it more people would be happy with their lives and there would be more relationships/ friendships and fun in this world if we wasnt so harsh to judge.
another talked about topic is looks.
the favourite saying is your not my type.
now i understand the laws of attraction and other things however i believe in a fair world and a fair trial .
what do i mean by this? well like i mention above about judging someone you dont know who could be that person your loving for in personality but you just been to quick to judge on how they look.
i dont get in this world why people cant take the time to get to know people for who they are, before the internet and before us humans starting being so picky
the human race was never like this we learned to work with each other. accept each other and fell in love with their personality.
where is that today when people take one look at your profile and make judgement on who you are what you look like and what you like.
us humans should be ok with who we are and what we like and look like but we dont we pick fault at ourself for being to geeky to fat to ugly to stupid because thats how other people see us .
i would like to know your opinions in a nice way
the last thing i want is for everyone to have a go at each other.
i hope in the future us humans can learn to accept each other and learn from one another as well.
i am sorry for my poor grammer and spelling as i am part dyslexia/ dispaxia yet another trait that people look down on people so harshly (:" A well written informative profile avoids wasting everyones time . You profile is a key marketing tool and your one chance to be entered into the race .
If you were selling a car , you would not state car for sale , you would need a much more detailed description .
If my profile was only two lines and no pictures , I am certain everyone would simply ignore me . |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"If you're not going to judge someone by what they write on their profile there is no point having anything on the profile. It's there to attract like minded people."
Swipe left or right on no text and no pictures just a user name? It might work. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Basically you're another young lad that doesn't see why ALL older women shouldn't meet you and that some of us dare to have a preference
i didnt say about older women in that whole thing?
i am suggesting that people are to quick to judge on age fair enough judge once you got to know them if they really arent for you and a lot of people inc myself dont contact people who are looking for my age range however that said like i mention some people put looking for 25-35 men/women this happeneds with both males and females and they tell you your to young or to old yet for eg. the person would be lets say 32 so the right age range and yet still shot down, without no reason?"
with the greatest of respect, your ideas are a load of baloney..
why shouldn't people judge what is best for them...I thought that was the whole point of writing a profile?
if I don't like what's written on a profile, or if I don't think I match what someone is looking for, why waste their and my time? at the end of the days it's all down to preference and if you don't fit someones preference then is a done deal and no amount of begging, oh sorry I meant reasoning, will change it..
best to bow out gracefully with your dignity intact
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