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Trusting your gut
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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People often say that the best way to avoid time wasters/ fakes etc is to trust your gut.
Have you found that you trust your gut more from being on this site? Is your gut feeling getting more 'tuned in' to other people?
Is trusting your gut a good thing or a bad thing? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People often say that the best way to avoid time wasters/ fakes etc is to trust your gut.
Have you found that you trust your gut more from being on this site? Is your gut feeling getting more 'tuned in' to other people?
Is trusting your gut a good thing or a bad thing?"
my gut is great.. unfortunately im not so good at listening to it.. i over think lol |
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Yes its got to be a good thing, trouble is in the past I have chose to ignore it. I have been on here for six years and had met men before on other sites.
Just lately I have become less trustworthy and would rather not bother with someone than feel I have wasted my time or regret meeting them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I never got that saying. I prefer reason and experience. I often think people are referring to learned responses when they say that anyway - experience can help form a "gut opinion." |
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"I never got that saying. I prefer reason and experience. I often think people are referring to learned responses when they say that anyway - experience can help form a "gut opinion.""
I don't find that - I find gut intuition often flies in the face of reason and learning, IMO it is a spirit function. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think I'm quite demanding in my wants and have filters and mental processes set to minimise the crap, however a couple have slipped past my bullshitometer recently  So no I probably don't use my gut instinct as much as I should  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I never got that saying. I prefer reason and experience. I often think people are referring to learned responses when they say that anyway - experience can help form a "gut opinion."
I don't find that - I find gut intuition often flies in the face of reason and learning, IMO it is a spirit function."
i think it's subliminal. a bit of what you've both said really.
you know if someone has lied to you before, you remember the bad stuff easier than the the good stuff (apparently) so you're gut tends to remind you to feel bad about being lied to again. or whatever else made you feel bad you're stomach will remind you.
i'm crap at explaining stuff...arg. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think I'm very switched on and intuitive when it comes to sussing people out. I don't have time to meet socially so i have to rely on my "gut feeling". I've never been wrong about anyone I've met. There's always a chance I've been over cautious over someone I've chosen not to meet but I'll never know about that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I never got that saying. I prefer reason and experience. I often think people are referring to learned responses when they say that anyway - experience can help form a "gut opinion."
I don't find that - I find gut intuition often flies in the face of reason and learning, IMO it is a spirit function.
i think it's subliminal. a bit of what you've both said really.
you know if someone has lied to you before, you remember the bad stuff easier than the the good stuff (apparently) so you're gut tends to remind you to feel bad about being lied to again. or whatever else made you feel bad you're stomach will remind you.
i'm crap at explaining stuff...arg."
I get what you mean and I agree. It's a bit of both. You explained it better than I did.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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as for OP often my stupid empathy overrides my gut and makes excuses for arseholes but i've been working on this a lot lately and listening to myself more.
been fairly lucky up to now that i've mostly been ok but i keep myself distanced from a lot of people emotionally and usually regret investing myself in anyone. hoping this changes along with my attitude. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I never got that saying. I prefer reason and experience. I often think people are referring to learned responses when they say that anyway - experience can help form a "gut opinion."
I don't find that - I find gut intuition often flies in the face of reason and learning, IMO it is a spirit function.
i think it's subliminal. a bit of what you've both said really.
you know if someone has lied to you before, you remember the bad stuff easier than the the good stuff (apparently) so you're gut tends to remind you to feel bad about being lied to again. or whatever else made you feel bad you're stomach will remind you.
i'm crap at explaining stuff...arg.
I get what you mean and I agree. It's a bit of both. You explained it better than I did. "
thanks. i know what i mean in my head but struggle to explain anything or feel like i do. not sure why, maybe i need to brush up on learning more words or something. |
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It's a strange thing, but you could try and take notice of your instincts or 'gut feeling' and the weird thing is, the more you do it, the more strange things you'll start noticing and things like guessing correctly who is on the phone will increase and other things. It's a very ancient and basic thing to have and it can be quite useful. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes its got to be a good thing, trouble is in the past I have chose to ignore it. I have been on here for six years and had met men before on other sites.
Just lately I have become less trustworthy and would rather not bother with someone than feel I have wasted my time or regret meeting them."
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People often say that the best way to avoid time wasters/ fakes etc is to trust your gut.
Have you found that you trust your gut more from being on this site? Is your gut feeling getting more 'tuned in' to other people?
Is trusting your gut a good thing or a bad thing?"
Always always listen to my gut feeling. Never been wrong yet so not planning on ignoring it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People often say that the best way to avoid time wasters/ fakes etc is to trust your gut.
Have you found that you trust your gut more from being on this site? Is your gut feeling getting more 'tuned in' to other people?
Is trusting your gut a good thing or a bad thing?"
I fart a lot so no. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
I saw a series on BBC4 about the brain. One episode looked at gut feelings and mentioned some research. The interweb throws up this synopsis:
That little voice in the back of your mind that says don’t trust them, don’t walk down that alley, don’t go to that party tonight, and think twice before investing stock, isn’t just a passing subconscious. We thrive in a culture that believes rationality and prevailing scientifically proven logic rules over the knee jerk reaction to pull out of the parking lot or investigate a partner’s alibi. There are just certain feelings humans obligatorily follow without concrete reasoning.
A 2011 study published in the journal Psychological Science revealed how the body is able to speak intuitively to the mind by dealing out a card game. Researchers designed a game based on no obvious strategy but forced participants to rely upon their hunches. Each participant was hooked up to a heart monitor and a finger sensor to measure sweat secretion. Most players figured out how to improve and eventually win the game, and researchers realized the winners were those who listened to their heart rate. It would speed up before they made a certain choice, but people mistook the subtle bodily changes for intuition.
“We often talk about intuition coming from the body — following our gut instincts and trusting our hearts,” the study’s coauthor Barnaby D. Dunn, of the Medical Research Council Cognition and Brain Sciences Unit in Cambridge, UK, said in a press release. “What happens in our bodies really does appear to influence what goes in our minds. We should be careful about following these gut instincts, however, as sometimes they help and sometimes they hinder our decision making.”
I think when I follow my gut instinct and it's right I pat myself on the back and claim it as gut instinct. When I don't and it goes wrong I blame it on bad luck. And the other person (if one is involved) being an eejit.  |
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"It's a strange thing, but you could try and take notice of your instincts or 'gut feeling' and the weird thing is, the more you do it, the more strange things you'll start noticing and things like guessing correctly who is on the phone will increase and other things. It's a very ancient and basic thing to have and it can be quite useful. "
Exactly so, like a muscle it gets stronger as you use it more.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I never got that saying. I prefer reason and experience. I often think people are referring to learned responses when they say that anyway - experience can help form a "gut opinion."
I don't find that - I find gut intuition often flies in the face of reason and learning, IMO it is a spirit function.
i think it's subliminal. a bit of what you've both said really.
you know if someone has lied to you before, you remember the bad stuff easier than the the good stuff (apparently) so you're gut tends to remind you to feel bad about being lied to again. or whatever else made you feel bad you're stomach will remind you.
i'm crap at explaining stuff...arg."
This makes sense about remembering the bad stuff.
You're good at explaining and making me think. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I saw a series on BBC4 about the brain. One episode looked at gut feelings and mentioned some research. The interweb throws up this synopsis:
That little voice in the back of your mind that says don’t trust them, don’t walk down that alley, don’t go to that party tonight, and think twice before investing stock, isn’t just a passing subconscious. We thrive in a culture that believes rationality and prevailing scientifically proven logic rules over the knee jerk reaction to pull out of the parking lot or investigate a partner’s alibi. There are just certain feelings humans obligatorily follow without concrete reasoning.
A 2011 study published in the journal Psychological Science revealed how the body is able to speak intuitively to the mind by dealing out a card game. Researchers designed a game based on no obvious strategy but forced participants to rely upon their hunches. Each participant was hooked up to a heart monitor and a finger sensor to measure sweat secretion. Most players figured out how to improve and eventually win the game, and researchers realized the winners were those who listened to their heart rate. It would speed up before they made a certain choice, but people mistook the subtle bodily changes for intuition.
“We often talk about intuition coming from the body — following our gut instincts and trusting our hearts,” the study’s coauthor Barnaby D. Dunn, of the Medical Research Council Cognition and Brain Sciences Unit in Cambridge, UK, said in a press release. “What happens in our bodies really does appear to influence what goes in our minds. We should be careful about following these gut instincts, however, as sometimes they help and sometimes they hinder our decision making.”
I think when I follow my gut instinct and it's right I pat myself on the back and claim it as gut instinct. When I don't and it goes wrong I blame it on bad luck. And the other person (if one is involved) being an eejit. "
That's interesting. Is there a link, or a phrase I can Google to find the article?
Very good point in your final paragraph!! Me too. 
Eejits. |
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I think we can do really well to trust our gut but may also be drawn into repeating our patterns of behaviour that may lead to mistakes, yet again.
Generally it's unwise not to hone your craft and be really in synch with what you're feeling.
But be aware too that you may be missing out on new experiences. So I'd favour just very controlled and limited forays into new territories.
My problem usually starts when I'm really excited and motivated about something. This emotional push can mask what are potentially cautionary signs that I may not notice or recognise. Or I suppress, choosing to ignore them.
Sometimes it's vital to keep check on yourself, reviewing over again if what you're doing is actually right. It can help by not giving a green light to a quick meet. |
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
I trust my gut instinct.
Occssionally, when I decline meet requests/messages etc. I have then been sent abusive messages by the guy concerned. What made me turn them down?
On 2 significant moments in my life, I ignored my gut instinct in favour of rational behaviour. That was when I saw my parents alive for the last time. I wish I had listened to my gut. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I usually follow my gut feeling. If someone or something feels fishy then it's usually fishy.
I have been wrong and walked away from good things and good people but I can't regret it. (As long as I'm right more than I'm wrong) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Is this the feeling you get in your stomach...
When you receive a email at 3am from someone with no pictures. That won't talk on the phone but sends you a address to meet right away  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"OP, there's a Horizon tonight about how we actually make decisions. BBC4 at 10pm.
"
Aargh missed it... taping it on repeat, Monday at 1.30am thank you!! |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"OP, there's a Horizon tonight about how we actually make decisions. BBC4 at 10pm.
Aargh missed it... taping it on repeat, Monday at 1.30am thank you!! "
It's from 2014 and I'm pretty sure I saw it then but I'm recording it too. |
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"People often say that the best way to avoid time wasters/ fakes etc is to trust your gut.
Have you found that you trust your gut more from being on this site? Is your gut feeling getting more 'tuned in' to other people?
Is trusting your gut a good thing or a bad thing?"
It's wise to listen to you're gut sometimes OP as it can and will warn you off making bad decisions or actions.
I like to refer it to as listening to you're lizard brain as it can often warn off danger to one self and how to avoid it or other scenarios where red flags get raised in you're mind..
Overall though like anything else it can sometimes be wrong too as you are only human and are prone to make mistakes here and there....
but bigger picture wise if something feels off/wrong or makes you feel uneasy it's probably best left alone. |
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