FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you 'feel' your gender?
Do you 'feel' your gender?
Jump to: Newest in thread
| |||
| |||
"I'm a bisexual woman in a mans body." But how do you know that? Are you identifying your sexual preferences or your gender? Can the two be separated? | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"This is a question that can't have a definitive answer. Feelings and the understanding of feelings is very individual. In turn, 2nd party understanding of another persons feelings is subjective. So my take is just be....." Oh I agree with you, if we all just let ourselves be ourselves... What I'm trying to understand are people like sexybrain who although male in appearance, say they feel like a woman. What does it feel like to be a man or woman? | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"Feel like a man (heh heh).....seriously, feel like a man, and act like a masculine man and am one. I an bisexual though but I never used to be so that was a bit weird to come to terms with. " Likewise, but at this point of my life, it doesn't make sense to run from it anymore. If some homophobe wants to challenge my sexuality to my face, I'll be perfectly happy to prove myself a 'man' in that respect, and he runs the risk of having his arse kicked by a semi-poof   | |||
"Feel like a man (heh heh).....seriously, feel like a man, and act like a masculine man and am one. I an bisexual though but I never used to be so that was a bit weird to come to terms with. " I know why the phrase 'suck it and see' was created.  | |||
| |||
The feminists will hate me but in my view it is more masculine to initiate and feminine to respond - and I prefer to respond.
In dancing we call that lead and follow, and I am a brilliant follower.   | |||
"Nattering with friends recently, we discussed how we feel like our gender. I'm female but how do I know what I feel like is female? On a scale of human female, I don't do the nails/hair/makeup thing and I take comfort and function over looks any day and I take pride in my health and impact on the bit of planet I'm on. What do you think?" I think that a lot of the ways that people would think as feeling female or feeling male are more to do with stereotypes and assumptions about gender.We are all individuals,none of us is created with these ways of thinkin,feeling and acting,,these likes and dislikes.They are all developed in us as we grow and are nurtured. An easy and obvious example is 'pink for girls,,,blue for boys'.That stereotype has changed over the years,others can change too. Feelings of being your sex are more to do with primary sexual characteristics,the ability to bear children,having breasts,a smooth complexion.However,an absence of these may make a person be perceived as less feminine but she will still be female. A persons gender characteristics are a result of their upbringing,their surroundings ,their personal development,,,a persons sex characteristics can change,just not so easily. Feeling female (or feeling male) is whatever you want it to be,whatever it is to you may be different to what it is to me or another person. Sorry for going on a bit,,I do tend to do that (typical woman,,,some might say  ). | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"I think that people who form an identity around factors they were born with are a bit sad really" You adapt to survive in your environment, that's the fundamental principle of evolution. | |||
| |||
"Interesting. I feel like a woman. I don't associate being a woman with things like doing my makeup and hair and those societal constructs. I don't really wear much makeup, I enjoy sports more than the spa, and I'm more loud and obnoxious than most women I know. But I still feel womanly. I think for me those are seperate things. It's hard for me to articulate because I haven't thought it out completely, but I know that I've never felt manly. I identify inwardly as a woman and it feels right." I only feel womanly when I'm with a man who is treating me like a woman. | |||
| |||
| |||
"I think that people who form an identity around factors they were born with are a bit sad really You adapt to survive in your environment, that's the fundamental principle of evolution." Could you elaborate on the link between personal identity and survival? | |||
wish i new the answer x | |||
| |||
" wish i new the answer x"Maybe the question is wrong then? In other cultures gender is seen as a spectrum and so it wouldn't be all that strange to see hybrid of masculine and feminine characteristics. It wouldn't even warrant a question. It's a very western concept that we must shoe horn everyone into just two categories, and not a good one. | |||
| |||
"I feel 100% like a man and have never had any doubt about this whatsoever. That said, my girlfriend is also a man (technically). However she feels and has always felt entirely feminine in every way. As a child she played with dolls and wanted to wear dresses. I never truly appreciated this until I was training at home with a jump rope. I skip like a guy (on the balls of my feet with little other movement) and she skips like a 7 yr old girl (as if running along a playground jumping tiny hurdles) From that moment I never doubted that she simply should have been born a girl. " love this x | |||
| |||
 to feel my gender but no one wants to play.  xxx | |||
"I would to feel my gender but no one wants to play. xxx" | |||
"I feel 100% like a man and have never had any doubt about this whatsoever. That said, my girlfriend is also a man (technically). However she feels and has always felt entirely feminine in every way. As a child she played with dolls and wanted to wear dresses. I never truly appreciated this until I was training at home with a jump rope. I skip like a guy (on the balls of my feet with little other movement) and she skips like a 7 yr old girl (as if running along a playground jumping tiny hurdles) From that moment I never doubted that she simply should have been born a girl. " Do you think it would be more helpful to have more of a spectrum view of gender? | |||
| |||
| |||
"Interesting. I feel like a woman. I don't associate being a woman with things like doing my makeup and hair and those societal constructs. I don't really wear much makeup, I enjoy sports more than the spa, and I'm more loud and obnoxious than most women I know. But I still feel womanly. I think for me those are seperate things. It's hard for me to articulate because I haven't thought it out completely, but I know that I've never felt manly. I identify inwardly as a woman and it feels right. I only feel womanly when I'm with a man who is treating me like a woman. " That's interesting. So when you're not with a man who is treating you like a woman, what do you feel like? Or do you just not feel manly/womanly in most situations? | |||
" Do you think it would be more helpful to have more of a spectrum view of gender?" Yes, without a doubt. We have a wide range of friends and if their view of gender were interpreted on a percentage scale I recon we know someone at 10% increments on the scale from one end to the other. | |||
"Nattering with friends recently, we discussed how we feel like our gender. I'm female but how do I know what I feel like is female? On a scale of human female, I don't do the nails/hair/makeup thing and I take comfort and function over looks any day and I take pride in my health and impact on the bit of planet I'm on. What do you think?" Every month my breasts turn into pinchy, painful MELONS. I cry at nothing, laugh at everything, I walk into furniture. Oh and the pain in my womb makes me want to roar, plus a desire to eat my own weight in chocolate. I feel unfortunately, extremely female then. | |||
| |||
"Nattering with friends recently, we discussed how we feel like our gender. I'm female but how do I know what I feel like is female? On a scale of human female, I don't do the nails/hair/makeup thing and I take comfort and function over looks any day and I take pride in my health and impact on the bit of planet I'm on. What do you think?" Mrs M Ok so I am a woman and I consider myself a woman but not a girly girl or a tomboy and then on a really deeper level we only really consider ourselves on whatever gender we have been programmed as such to be over many many years surely we all are who we are Live and let live | |||
| |||
"I feel 100% like a man and have never had any doubt about this whatsoever. That said, my girlfriend is also a man (technically). However she feels and has always felt entirely feminine in every way. As a child she played with dolls and wanted to wear dresses. I never truly appreciated this until I was training at home with a jump rope. I skip like a guy (on the balls of my feet with little other movement) and she skips like a 7 yr old girl (as if running along a playground jumping tiny hurdles) From that moment I never doubted that she simply should have been born a girl. " I skip like you do. | |||
"I think there is a difference between not feeling girly and not feeling your gender I remember a young lady a few years ago who I used to go into via work who tried to cut her own breasts off because she hated her body so much, she said she didn't identify with the body she was in and wanted to change it, she was only 17 To me that's not feeling the gender you was born " I can absolutely empathise with this,as a young person feeling such despair at the sight of the body you see in the mirror that you are tempted to mutilate yourself.....but,,a surgeon can do a much neater job and the feelings of liberation when your body finally is congruent with your soul really do make life worth living. Just saying that for the benefit of anyone reading who does feel compelled to harm themselves,,,,there is a much better way and it really is worth the pain and heartache. | |||
| |||
"Nattering with friends recently, we discussed how we feel like our gender. I'm female but how do I know what I feel like is female? On a scale of human female, I don't do the nails/hair/makeup thing and I take comfort and function over looks any day and I take pride in my health and impact on the bit of planet I'm on. What do you think? I think that a lot of the ways that people would think as feeling female or feeling male are more to do with stereotypes and assumptions about gender.We are all individuals,none of us is created with these ways of thinkin,feeling and acting,,these likes and dislikes.They are all developed in us as we grow and are nurtured. An easy and obvious example is 'pink for girls,,,blue for boys'.That stereotype has changed over the years,others can change too. Feelings of being your sex are more to do with primary sexual characteristics,the ability to bear children,having breasts,a smooth complexion.However,an absence of these may make a person be perceived as less feminine but she will still be female. A persons gender characteristics are a result of their upbringing,their surroundings ,their personal development,,,a persons sex characteristics can change,just not so easily. Feeling female (or feeling male) is whatever you want it to be,whatever it is to you may be different to what it is to me or another person. Sorry for going on a bit,,I do tend to do that (typical woman,,,some might say )."It's interesting. x | |||
" wish i new the answer x
Maybe the question is wrong then?
In other cultures gender is seen as a spectrum and so it wouldn't be all that strange to see hybrid of masculine and feminine characteristics. It wouldn't even warrant a question.
It's a very western concept that we must shoe horn everyone into just two categories, and not a good one."That makes sense, I've never thought of it that way. | |||
| |||
"I think that people who form an identity around factors they were born with are a bit sad really You adapt to survive in your environment, that's the fundamental principle of evolution. Could you elaborate on the link between personal identity and survival? " Sometimes you have to repress your inner self in order to be better accepted by those around you, I'm sure homosexuals in Americas backward bible belt can attest to this. | |||
" Do you think it would be more helpful to have more of a spectrum view of gender? Yes, without a doubt. We have a wide range of friends and if their view of gender were interpreted on a percentage scale I recon we know someone at 10% increments on the scale from one end to the other. " Reading 1984 got me thinking about this kind of thing. We use language that in many ways confines our thinking and I believe a lot of it leads to prejudice. When you tell kids that there are only two categories of gender and that one of those categories wears a dress and the other doesn't - then of course they think it's strange if they see a guy in a dress. If you told them gender was a spectrum, for agreements sake it was an eight point scale then what was a 'guy in a dress' is just a 'point near the middle' where the distinctions aren't so strong. No further explanation would be necessary. Ironically people don't seem to mind talking about sexuality in these terms - "I'm bi but I prefer women" (~70% straight) but I think too many people can't get past thinking of gender as your genitals. | |||
"I feel 100% like a man and have never had any doubt about this whatsoever. That said, my girlfriend is also a man (technically). However she feels and has always felt entirely feminine in every way. As a child she played with dolls and wanted to wear dresses. I never truly appreciated this until I was training at home with a jump rope. I skip like a guy (on the balls of my feet with little other movement) and she skips like a 7 yr old girl (as if running along a playground jumping tiny hurdles) From that moment I never doubted that she simply should have been born a girl. I skip like you do." Which one of us were you talking to. | |||
| |||
| |||
"I LOVE having a vagina - WAY more than I ever thought was possible (and not just in a sexual arousal way). " I quite fancy having tits but wouldn't swap johnson for fanny in exchange for all the cheese in cheddar! | |||
| |||
| |||
"Nattering with friends recently, we discussed how we feel like our gender. I'm female but how do I know what I feel like is female? On a scale of human female, I don't do the nails/hair/makeup thing and I take comfort and function over looks any day and I take pride in my health and impact on the bit of planet I'm on. What do you think?" . I think all those things are just societal"female" things.... We spend way too much time worrying about nonsense like gender, to me it's a sign of a society with not enough real stuff to do or worry about, maybe that's good, maybe I'm just getting older | |||
"Nattering with friends recently, we discussed how we feel like our gender. I'm female but how do I know what I feel like is female? On a scale of human female, I don't do the nails/hair/makeup thing and I take comfort and function over looks any day and I take pride in my health and impact on the bit of planet I'm on. What do you think?. I think all those things are just societal"female" things.... We spend way too much time worrying about nonsense like gender, to me it's a sign of a society with not enough real stuff to do or worry about, maybe that's good, maybe I'm just getting older " I remember reading a book by an Austrian Jewish immigrant to America whose family fled Austria just before WW2. They lived in a fairly shit block of flats and the boy was semi-traumatised when he read an article in the local newspaper about how such flats were 'destroying the character' of the neighbourhood. He was upset and asked his dad if the article was true? His dad smiled and said "the biggest problem people here have is what statement their home makes about the identity of their neighbourhood. What a fantastic country" | |||
| |||
"I like sewing, shoe shopping, hell I like shopping in general, I cook, I clean, and I look after my son, I bake, I've even taken to meeting the girls (other single parents) for coffee, but I still feel that I do all these things like a man, because I am a man,no matter how new age and feminist I am, I'm still a male, I scratch my balls and leave the toilet seat up, I use the foulest of language while watching football, and I'm happy that way "I like sewing; I'm on my third machine. Two ex's took my others. I luuuurve shoe and clothes shopping. I cook. I clean. I have custody of my daughters. First one at 16 months (she's now 24yrs) the second aged 4 ( she's 20). I mothered rather than fathered. Everyone saw that. My baking is a bit shit but I can do lemon drizzle cake. I used to do coffee after dropping the kids at school if I had time. I hate my balls. I never stand to pee. I can't abide sport. I love chick flicks and love songs. I cry at anything sad or cute or emotional. I'm happy that way. | |||
"I feel 100% like a man but I appear to be not like any man I've ever known. I feel different and women especially, don't react to me like they do with other men. I tend to not have a great affinity with men either. I'm somehow different to the rest in a way I've never been able to quite put my finger on. I guess as long as I can keep on being me I'll be fine." It's because you're nice | |||
I feel that I am a woman though I don't tend to do many stereotypical 'girlie' things.
I like logic and building and I can reverse park. But I still feel like a very feminine being | |||
| |||
