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Younger or older lover?

By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

I was chatting to a male friend of mine over a drink today. A gorgeous guy with an amazing body so he gets a LOT of attention from women. He isn't a swinger but he is a personal friend of mine.

He is 42 and whilst he gets lots of women in their early 20s offering him sex, he always turns them down. His friends think he is mad but he says he doesn't want someone who is young but he wants a real woman of his own age range who knows what she wants!

He isn't looking for a lot older either. Just around his age range so late 30s to late 40s.

It got me thinking. I dislike it when young guys approach me looking for the cougar experience. I don't personally find it flattering and they hold no interest for me. I also like guys around my own age range or thereabouts.

So I wonder what guys think. Do women make better lovers as they get older and if so, why? My friend added that a woman his own age knows what to do with him!

I wonder what is the difference in the experience of sex with a woman in her 20s compared with her 40s or older? What specifically makes it 'better'???

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think it has nothing to do with age.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I personally prefer men my age as i feel more comfortable.

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By *otgirl32Woman over a year ago

Ashton Under Lyne

Personally I love much younger and much older men. Both are great lovers but in different ways and I enjoy them.

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"I think it has nothing to do with age."

OK. . So what do you think makes for a better female lover? Maybe 'better' isn't the right word. Not sure. But say..... more fulfilling experience?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i got better sexually the older i got but i've found older guys tend not to have the energy or hardness i need for sex so have stuck with younger guys on here. tbh i was in my 20s when i got good at bj and confident in bed.

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good.

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Personally I love much younger and much older men. Both are great lovers but in different ways and I enjoy them."

So how are they different then? You say great but different

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"i got better sexually the older i got but i've found older guys tend not to have the energy or hardness i need for sex so have stuck with younger guys on here. tbh i was in my 20s when i got good at bj and confident in bed.

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good."

I don't think I was a great liver at all in my 20s. I think it took me years to grow into my own skin so to speak. ..

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

*lover (not liver!!!

)

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By *ethnmelvCouple over a year ago

Cardiff

"I think it has nothing to do with age."

totally agree with you!

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"I personally prefer men my age as i feel more comfortable. "

So for you it sounds like it isn't so much about their 'performance ' but more about you feeling more comfortable with your own age group?

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"I think it has nothing to do with age.

totally agree with you!"

Fine. But if it isn't about age for you, then what makes it more fulfilling?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good.

I don't think I was a great liver at all in my 20s. I think it took me years to grow into my own skin so to speak. .."

i was lucky that when i was 19 i found someone who was not confident in bed so i always had to take the lead and be active, go on top, all that kind of stuff because he didn't know what to do (and neither did i but he never complained about me trying things out) got to the point where i had to ask for what i wanted because he didn't have a clue really.

i think because of him i ended up with my dominant streak.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think every person is different, there is the experience thing aswell. What is to say a lady in her 40's has had more sexual experiences than a lady in her 20's. It all comes down to chemistry for me. if you both are into each other then the experience would be great x

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By *orthseatiger69Man over a year ago

Ayrshire /North lanarshire

I don't think age has anything to do with how good a lover will be or not. I prefer woman around my own age or slightly older as we are likely to have more in common. It's not all about sex during a meet .

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By *ethnmelvCouple over a year ago

Cardiff

"I think it has nothing to do with age.

totally agree with you!

Fine. But if it isn't about age for you, then what makes it more fulfilling?"

personal confidence

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/06/16 01:20:22]

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By *ackett1962Man over a year ago

harrow

I personally wouldn't go with someone in their 20s or early 30s. I find women are a lot more interesting as they get older. They are more confident in the bedroom and aren't afraid to say what they want. But that's only in my experience. I generally

Stay within a 10 year age gap either way.

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good.

I don't think I was a great liver at all in my 20s. I think it took me years to grow into my own skin so to speak. ..

i think because of him i ended up with my dominant streak. "

Thats interesting. ..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I prefer older women +45 in age as they are more on my wavelength, plus their life experience makes the shag hotter and guidance

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"I think every person is different, there is the experience thing aswell. What is to say a lady in her 40's has had more sexual experiences than a lady in her 20's. It all comes down to chemistry for me. if you both are into each other then the experience would be great x"

This is a good point. However I wonder if life experience and not just sexual experience plays a part in a person's overall confidence to ask for what they need and express their likes and dislikes with confidence competed to when they were younger. This is certainly true for me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Love making is akin to wine.

Matured in the right conditions, leads to a very fulfilling experience. However a quality young wine will have a fresher bite with a bit more zing.

Just depends on whatever floats your boat.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I think it has nothing to do with age."

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good.

I don't think I was a great liver at all in my 20s. I think it took me years to grow into my own skin so to speak. ..

i think because of him i ended up with my dominant streak.

Thats interesting. .."

ill go on then...i like talking, sorry.

i thionk there's 2 ways to boost your confidence, at any age.

one is trying new things in an environment where you can feel comfortable doing that and nobody shames you for it.

the other is if others encourage you as well.

i got lucky and had both of these, got the encourager in my 20s later on.

had the douchebag who tred to destroy my confidence in between those 2 but it didn't work.

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"I don't think age has anything to do with how good a lover will be or not. I prefer woman around my own age or slightly older as we are likely to have more in common. It's not all about sex during a meet ."

Well do remember I wasn't talking to a man who is a member of the swinging community. So he isn't necessarily meeting lots of women for NSA sex. But he commented about the sexual experience of being with ladies his own age range compared to younger. Maybe I was surprised (pleasantly so) as i had envisioned my friend being attracted to younger women as he can attract any woman he likes really... very good looking guy! But it was nice to know it wasn't all about her being youthful looking .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think life experience can play a big part in someones sexual life. because it could be that one time when they were put off for some reason and stayed in the shell for many years... to some people sex may not be what it seems to others.

May i say you have started a very good thread x

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good.

I don't think I was a great liver at all in my 20s. I think it took me years to grow into my own skin so to speak. ..

i think because of him i ended up with my dominant streak.

Thats interesting. ..

ill go on then...i like talking, sorry.

i thionk there's 2 ways to boost your confidence, at any age.

one is trying new things in an environment where you can feel comfortable doing that and nobody shames you for it.

the other is if others encourage you as well.

i got lucky and had both of these, got the encourager in my 20s later on.

had the douchebag who tred to destroy my confidence in between those 2 but it didn't work."

I am glad you had good experiences at that age because for so many, that isnt the case and we spend years repairing our self esteem because there is no doubt that confidence is sexy!

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"I think life experience can play a big part in someones sexual life. because it could be that one time when they were put off for some reason and stayed in the shell for many years... to some people sex may not be what it seems to others.

May i say you have started a very good thread x"

Thankyou.... it is an interesting topic when I think about it more and reflect on my own experiences.

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Love making is akin to wine.

Matured in the right conditions, leads to a very fulfilling experience. However a quality young wine will have a fresher bite with a bit more zing.

Just depends on whatever floats your boat."

LOL! !!! Well I think I need to re read that to fully absorb it lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good.

I don't think I was a great liver at all in my 20s. I think it took me years to grow into my own skin so to speak. ..

i think because of him i ended up with my dominant streak.

Thats interesting. ..

ill go on then...i like talking, sorry.

i thionk there's 2 ways to boost your confidence, at any age.

one is trying new things in an environment where you can feel comfortable doing that and nobody shames you for it.

the other is if others encourage you as well.

i got lucky and had both of these, got the encourager in my 20s later on.

had the douchebag who tred to destroy my confidence in between those 2 but it didn't work.

I am glad you had good experiences at that age because for so many, that isnt the case and we spend years repairing our self esteem because there is no doubt that confidence is sexy!"

thanks, so am i.

not just for sexiness really, although that's what this topic is about, but more for my own mental health as well. he helped me in so many ways and knows it.

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good.

I don't think I was a great liver at all in my 20s. I think it took me years to grow into my own skin so to speak. ..

i think because of him i ended up with my dominant streak.

Thats interesting. ..

ill go on then...i like talking, sorry.

i thionk there's 2 ways to boost your confidence, at any age.

one is trying new things in an environment where you can feel comfortable doing that and nobody shames you for it.

the other is if others encourage you as well.

i got lucky and had both of these, got the encourager in my 20s later on.

had the douchebag who tred to destroy my confidence in between those 2 but it didn't work.

I am glad you had good experiences at that age because for so many, that isnt the case and we spend years repairing our self esteem because there is no doubt that confidence is sexy!

thanks, so am i.

not just for sexiness really, although that's what this topic is about, but more for my own mental health as well. he helped me in so many ways and knows it.

Well sex is about expression. Identity. Intimacy. Individualism. Allowing ourselves to free up and let go. So in a healthy sexual relationship /situation where there is trust and connection then i agree ..it absolutely helps your mental health. It is bonding. However with the wrong person or if you are mentally /emotionally in the wrong place, it can do a lot of damage

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good."
i meet young men who i enjoy.howeva i do somemtimes meet a guy (68) and he is fit wow.

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good.i meet young men who i enjoy.howeva i do somemtimes meet a guy (68) and he is fit wow."

Is there a difference in the sexual experience you get with younger vs older guys then..or is it similar for you?

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

I guess the question is subjective as of course, ;it depends on your own definition of great sex fundamentally! But I just reflect on myself as a sexual partner at the ripe old age of 47 compared with 27 or younger.... I imagine I thought I was amazing in my 20s lol... but looking back, I really wasn't at all. It took time.... experience. ... learning to relax and let go....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good.

I don't think I was a great liver at all in my 20s. I think it took me years to grow into my own skin so to speak. ..

i think because of him i ended up with my dominant streak.

Thats interesting. ..

ill go on then...i like talking, sorry.

i thionk there's 2 ways to boost your confidence, at any age.

one is trying new things in an environment where you can feel comfortable doing that and nobody shames you for it.

the other is if others encourage you as well.

i got lucky and had both of these, got the encourager in my 20s later on.

had the douchebag who tred to destroy my confidence in between those 2 but it didn't work.

I am glad you had good experiences at that age because for so many, that isnt the case and we spend years repairing our self esteem because there is no doubt that confidence is sexy!

thanks, so am i.

not just for sexiness really, although that's what this topic is about, but more for my own mental health as well. he helped me in so many ways and knows it.

yes intimacy and bonding. that's what he helped me with there.

you make sex sound so deep and i never thought about it that way before. it didn't seem deep at the time but i suppose it was when you look at it like that.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good.i meet young men who i enjoy.howeva i do somemtimes meet a guy (68) and he is fit wow."

i've met a 63 yr old off here and tbh he was good in bed but not energetic or anything.

68 good for him.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I think it has nothing to do with age."

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

am branching into seeing older guys now and see how that goes. hopefully it'll be good.

I don't think I was a great liver at all in my 20s. I think it took me years to grow into my own skin so to speak. ..

i think because of him i ended up with my dominant streak.

Thats interesting. ..

ill go on then...i like talking, sorry.

i thionk there's 2 ways to boost your confidence, at any age.

one is trying new things in an environment where you can feel comfortable doing that and nobody shames you for it.

the other is if others encourage you as well.

i got lucky and had both of these, got the encourager in my 20s later on.

had the douchebag who tred to destroy my confidence in between those 2 but it didn't work.

I am glad you had good experiences at that age because for so many, that isnt the case and we spend years repairing our self esteem because there is no doubt that confidence is sexy!

thanks, so am i.

not just for sexiness really, although that's what this topic is about, but more for my own mental health as well. he helped me in so many ways and knows it.

yes intimacy and bonding. that's what he helped me with there.

you make sex sound so deep and i never thought about it that way before. it didn't seem deep at the time but i suppose it was when you look at it like that."

There is a belief system that when we have sex with someone, we exchange energy with that person. So be careful who you give your energy to and whose energy you recieve. Could be positive or negative. .. and we all know when it is one or the other. Sex is never really just sex however brief and transient.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I always have preferred ladies who are of an older age. I think experience of life counts for alot both personally and sexually. On the sexual side it takes time to discover who you are and what you like and I like people who know what they like.

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

Right. Really must sleep! Catch up with this conversation tomorrow. Been interesting. Thanks to all who participated. Night x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've had great sex with both younger and older. It's more to do with compatibility, maturity and confidence that will lead to stimulation, increased intimacy and sensation in the bedroom, or so I've found.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I suppose it depends on what u r searching for i personly find and older women more desirable mature bbw is my catergary lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Right. Really must sleep! Catch up with this conversation tomorrow. Been interesting. Thanks to all who participated. Night x"

thanks.

gave me something to think about anyway with the sharing of energies. i'm after sex that boosts me and glad i waited for that.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

68 hope u gonna help out with the 69 u must know thats whats going down lol

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By *lactontogMan over a year ago

Clacton on Sea

I prefer mature women because like me they have aged a bit and not body perfect like a young person would be.

As for sexual performance mature women do have the edge for me as I don't play with enough younger women to give a comparison lol.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

For myself young women are just too immature where an older women doesn't play games and you know where you stand.
"I was chatting to a male friend of mine over a drink today. A gorgeous guy with an amazing body so he gets a LOT of attention from women. He isn't a swinger but he is a personal friend of mine.

He isn't looking for a lot older either. Just around his age range so late 30s to late 40s.

So I wonder what guys think. Do women make better lovers as they get older and if so, why? My friend added that a woman his own age knows what to do with him!

I wonder what is the difference in the experience of sex with a woman in her 20s compared with her 40s or older? What specifically makes it 'better'??? "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm 27 but it's unlikely I'd go with a guy younger than me! Esp if they look really young. It just makes me uncomfortable!

I also don't think the cougar thing is particularly flattering tbh!

I always go for guys older than me, mid 30s and up really

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've always preferred older guys, my last three male partners were my 22 to his 29, 24 to 32 and 25 to 30/31. I think I get a feeling of safety with someone who's older than I do with my age or younger. Older men get protective - not in a bad way - of me whereas younger men don't, and on a particularly bad day especially, I welcome that affection.

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By *ficouldMan over a year ago

a quandary, could you change my mind?

Older lover for moi.

It is not just about the horizontal mambo, it's about the connection too.

I feel far more comfortable with people about my own age and older, although they must have a young mindset aswell.

I don't look at things as the cougar experience, milf, gilf, etc. It's about mutual enjoyment of things we would like to try with zero embarrassment if it is not to our likings.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

Ive met guys or should i say know guys that wont go with younger women and it doesnt have anything to do with them being better lovers

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By *uzy444Woman over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

dont do the cougar thing plus i have kids in their 20's..so i avoid the twenties..plus being honest ive had adventurous partners all the way through my life..its only now im finding some men who can stretch my experiences and its awesome..so not about age, ive had older and younger..its about their experiences and what they like to do/ try...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I cant stand the stereotype that younger women dont know what they want.

Anyone whos met me can attest that i know my mind and if anything im usually the one taking the lead.

At the same time though im a hypocrite cause id usually rather meet an older man.

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

I prefer mature women because like me they have aged a bit and not body perfect like a young person would be.

As for sexual performance mature women do have the edge for me as I don't play with enough younger women to give a comparison lol."

Speak for yourself ! Lol! A lot of YOUNG women and men are far from body perfect these days! I have known many men older enough to be their dad with FAR better bodies!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The difference between older and young is when we were young we just thought we were good in bed

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"I've always preferred older guys, my last three male partners were my 22 to his 29, 24 to 32 and 25 to 30/31. I think I get a feeling of safety with someone who's older than I do with my age or younger. Older men get protective - not in a bad way - of me whereas younger men don't, and on a particularly bad day especially, I welcome that affection."

I was EXACTLY the same when I was your age and younger! Always went for guys about 10 years older for similar reasons plus they had more maturity and something to say!

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By *ubbykitten OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"I'm 27 but it's unlikely I'd go with a guy younger than me! Esp if they look really young. It just makes me uncomfortable!

I also don't think the cougar thing is particularly flattering tbh!

I always go for guys older than me, mid 30s and up really

I don't like the cougar label either. Makes me feel like a novelty act!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

From my personal experience ive had great times with women older and younger but i find older women are more confident in their bodies which leads to a better experience. Having said that its not always the case and obviously totally depends on the individual.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm 27 but it's unlikely I'd go with a guy younger than me! Esp if they look really young. It just makes me uncomfortable!

I also don't think the cougar thing is particularly flattering tbh!

I always go for guys older than me, mid 30s and up really

I don't like the cougar label either. Makes me feel like a novelty act!"

Yep! It's grim!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Older women is definetly the way too go. Women my age are like puppies, they get over excited, very short attention span, hard too train and make mistakes. You don't have to worry about any of the above with a woman of experience and age

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Older women is definetly the way too go. Women my age are like puppies, they get over excited, very short attention span, hard too train and make mistakes. You don't have to worry about any of the above with a woman of experience and age "

Wow. If someone suggested I needed training, I'd be off like a shot! -.-

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have a short atten......shit what was I saying

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Older every time

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Does that not apply to men also?

If so what can a guy of your age after an older woman I don't want a guy making mistakes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have to say from personal experience, older women are by far the best sexually.

When I was in my early 20's I had one of the greatest nights of my life with a lady who was 42, my god that woman was insatiable!!

An older woman has far less inhibitions than their younger counter parts, they know exactly what they want and they know what they like. Of course they are more practiced (in general terms), but younger woman are more self concious and when it comes to sex generally they are just lay there and do it.... But this is of course my opinion and I'm sure it may stir up differences of opinion but that's my thoughts.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Does that not apply to men also?

If so what can a guy of your age after an older woman I don't want a guy making mistakes

It certainly does apply too men, but they're a lot easier to train and to get into good habbits

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By *imjohnCouple over a year ago

Clacton on sea, Essex

I prefer mature women because like me they have aged a bit and not body perfect like a young person would be.

As for sexual performance mature women do have the edge for me as I don't play with enough younger women to give a comparison lol.

Speak for yourself ! Lol! A lot of YOUNG women and men are far from body perfect these days! I have known many men older enough to be their dad with FAR better bodies!!!! "

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By *erfectman122Man over a year ago

from somewhere nice

I have had both sides younger and older I do prefer a bit older it's down to personality with me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Its about sexual chemistry and not age.

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By *ensualtouch15Man over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

I like 27 to 35

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By *iss AdventureWoman over a year ago

Wonderland

I prefer the same age or older cause a connection for me is as much about mental maturity as age and I've seldom met anyone under what I would class as my age range (under about 30) that I considered to be a man. But that said I've encountered some immature older guys too.

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