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Bar is open.....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hendricks and tonic with cucumber please
I will give you my personal cucumber from the veg rack"
Ooh err, they are my very favourite type of cucumber, thankyou kind sir!  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Is this the AA meeting? So far I've had.... 2 bottles of Peroni and 3 dark fruit Bulmers.. waiting for bgt to start!"
Sorry sir but youre in the wrong building |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"Can you recommend something refreshing.
Yes ...press the symbol on your pc which looks like a circle with an arrow head .....that's refreshing !"
Bugger I'm on my phone. I'll have lemonade with I slice of sarcasm |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Can you recommend something refreshing.
Yes ...press the symbol on your pc which looks like a circle with an arrow head .....that's refreshing !
Bugger I'm on my phone. I'll have lemonade with I slice of sarcasm "  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Vodka and diet .. no ice please x
Yes but can I have your number? x
And why would you like my number?
To recite poetry to you . "
Poetry??? Hmmm . This I would like to hear . Hehehe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is this the AA meeting? So far I've had.... 2 bottles of Peroni and 3 dark fruit Bulmers.. waiting for bgt to start!. Did you sort your blinds out, clearly you were not murdered "
Thanks for asking but don't speak to me about bastard blinds. First I trek to b and q, they don't have them. Ok so I travel to dunelm who have them.... I didn't realise how long they were in the packaging. .. I'm in a tiny convertible, driving on a dual carriageway with blackpool tower sticking out the car, I gets home all chuffed with myself.... THE BLINDS ARE 6 INCH TOO SHORT... Blackpool Tower gets back in the car and goes back to dunelm for a refund to my card and I have had to pay 210.00 for made to measure bustard blinds only available in 4 bastard weeks. |
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"Is this the AA meeting? So far I've had.... 2 bottles of Peroni and 3 dark fruit Bulmers.. waiting for bgt to start!. Did you sort your blinds out, clearly you were not murdered
Thanks for asking but don't speak to me about bastard blinds. First I trek to b and q, they don't have them. Ok so I travel to dunelm who have them.... I didn't realise how long they were in the packaging. .. I'm in a tiny convertible, driving on a dual carriageway with blackpool tower sticking out the car, I gets home all chuffed with myself.... THE BLINDS ARE 6 INCH TOO SHORT... Blackpool Tower gets back in the car and goes back to dunelm for a refund to my card and I have had to pay 210.00 for made to measure bustard blinds only available in 4 bastard weeks." . I'm sorry but that's quite funny, at least you lived to tell the tale  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is this the AA meeting? So far I've had.... 2 bottles of Peroni and 3 dark fruit Bulmers.. waiting for bgt to start!. Did you sort your blinds out, clearly you were not murdered
Thanks for asking but don't speak to me about bastard blinds. First I trek to b and q, they don't have them. Ok so I travel to dunelm who have them.... I didn't realise how long they were in the packaging. .. I'm in a tiny convertible, driving on a dual carriageway with blackpool tower sticking out the car, I gets home all chuffed with myself.... THE BLINDS ARE 6 INCH TOO SHORT... Blackpool Tower gets back in the car and goes back to dunelm for a refund to my card and I have had to pay 210.00 for made to measure bustard blinds only available in 4 bastard weeks.. I'm sorry but that's quite funny, at least you lived to tell the tale "
Only just. I'm never cleaning ever again. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Nice fruity red for me if I may be so bold.
Of course you sexy thing"
Actually have a bottle pending for me and a girly pants rose nonsense in the fridge for the wing chick. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A mint chocolate martini please !!
Lip smackingly good !!
I cant keep up ...ive got cheese on toast on the go ...help "
4 slices, buttered, whole meal, extra mature please.
Don't forget the black pepper. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"A mint chocolate martini please !!
Lip smackingly good !!
I cant keep up ...ive got cheese on toast on the go ...help
4 slices, buttered, whole meal, extra mature please.
Don't forget the black pepper."
Just how I like it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Another please Barkeep - it's brisk at "cough" mph..."
My Speedo doesn't register coughs....must be fast
I'll have a cider please... I have a thirst tonight... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Another please Barkeep - it's brisk at "cough" mph...
My Speedo doesn't register coughs....must be fast
I'll have a cider please... I have a thirst tonight..."
Between you and me...
I didn't break one speed limit... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Another please Barkeep - it's brisk at "cough" mph...
My Speedo doesn't register coughs....must be fast
I'll have a cider please... I have a thirst tonight..."
Cider it is Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Another please Barkeep - it's brisk at "cough" mph...
My Speedo doesn't register coughs....must be fast
I'll have a cider please... I have a thirst tonight...
Between you and me...
I didn't break one speed limit..."
It was at least five!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Another please Barkeep - it's brisk at "cough" mph...
My Speedo doesn't register coughs....must be fast
I'll have a cider please... I have a thirst tonight...
Between you and me...
I didn't break one speed limit...
It was at least five! "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Another please Barkeep - it's brisk at "cough" mph...
My Speedo doesn't register coughs....must be fast
I'll have a cider please... I have a thirst tonight...
Between you and me...
I didn't break one speed limit...
It was at least five! "
Might need to take your socks off....  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Diet and vodka and a tube of salt n vinegar pringles pls..... let's see if I have another to myself I burn my tongue again "
Certainly my darling....x |
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