"I'd now do a joke about quantum physics but while they're funny, they're also not funny at the same time.
Ah c'mon Joe, ya can't string us all along like that. "
Well, actually, theoretically, he can  |
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"[Removed by poster at 09/05/16 23:15:39]"
A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting.
The biologist shoots at a deer and misses 5ft to the left, the chemist takes a shot and misses 5ft to the right, and the statistician yells, ‘We got ‘im!’
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By *al2001Man
over a year ago
kildare |
"[Removed by poster at 09/05/16 23:15:39]
A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting.
The biologist shoots at a deer and misses 5ft to the left, the chemist takes a shot and misses 5ft to the right, and the statistician yells, ‘We got ‘im!’
"
Probably |
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"So a classics professor goes to a tailor to get his trousers mended.
The tailor asks, ‘Euripedes?’
The professor replies, ‘Yes. Eumenides?
(I'll get my coat...)"
This made me laugh (for the first time since the royal wedding) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Heisenberg and Schrodinger are speeding down the motorway when a policeman pulls them over. The policeman walks up to the window and asks Heisenberg,
“do you know how fast you were going?”
Heisenberg replies, “No, but I knew where I was.”
Thinking this answer a little strange; the policeman decides to investigate the boot. Shocked by what he finds he shouts, “You have a dead cat in here!”
Schrodinger answers, “well I do now!”
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"Heisenberg and Schrodinger are speeding down the motorway when a policeman pulls them over. The policeman walks up to the window and asks Heisenberg,
“do you know how fast you were going?”
Heisenberg replies, “No, but I knew where I was.”
Thinking this answer a little strange; the policeman decides to investigate the boot. Shocked by what he finds he shouts, “You have a dead cat in here!”
Schrodinger answers, “well I do now!”
"
LOL |
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Mmmmkay...
Werner Heisenberg, Kurt Gödel, and Noam Chomsky walk into a bar.
Heisenberg turns to the other two and says, ‘Clearly this is a joke, but how can we figure out if it's funny or not?’
Gödel replies, ‘We can't know that because we're inside the joke.’
Chomsky says, ‘Of course it's funny. You're just telling it wrong.’ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mmmmkay...
Werner Heisenberg, Kurt Gödel, and Noam Chomsky walk into a bar.
Heisenberg turns to the other two and says, ‘Clearly this is a joke, but how can we figure out if it's funny or not?’
Gödel replies, ‘We can't know that because we're inside the joke.’
Chomsky says, ‘Of course it's funny. You're just telling it wrong.’"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Einstein, Newton and Pascal are playing hide and seek. Its Einstein’s turn to count so he covers his eyes and starts counting to ten. Pascal runs off and hides. Newton draws a one metre by one metre square on the ground in front of Einstein then stands in the middle of it. Einstein reaches ten and opens his eyes. He sees Newton and shouts “Newton! I have found you, you’re it”
Newton smiles and says, “you didn’t find me, you found a Newton over a square metre; you found Pascal”
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Why are 6 atoms afraid of 7....because 789....acccctually they don't eat each other they merge because some atoms come together in a process known as fusion, unless you're a dwarf star which occurs after a supernova and you eat everything including light and space causing a wormhole.....oops got carried away.
A wet fart through a mankini |
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made me lol
- thank you!