FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > 'This site will DESTROY your marriage!'
'This site will DESTROY your marriage!'
Jump to: Newest in thread
| |||
" I was always taught that marriage constitutes a willing agreement, based upon love between a man and a woman, who have made the decision to spend their lives together, to honour and support one another, to maintain a bond of love and trust so they can build a better life together, possibly even raise a family " There's nothing in there about only having sex with each other though.... maybe it's possible to have it all? | |||
 | |||
"I remember my wife vowing to 'love, honour and OBEY' but she swears blind it wasn't in the vow. "I think that became an optional part of vows a while back? I might be wrong though  | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"I remember my wife vowing to 'love, honour and OBEY' but she swears blind it wasn't in the vow.
I think that became an optional part of vows a while back? I might be wrong though "I refused to say obey in my vows I promised to love and cherish which I did he on the other hand didn't. | |||
| |||
"Personally we are not made to have sex with one person for the rest of our lives. We set up home with our "mate".... Raise a family etc But the sexual desire for others doesn't go away. And it's merely just that "sex". If people talked more openly to one another about their needs/desires/fantasy, then maybe affairs would be a thing of the past? " ^^^^^ this  | |||
"I remember my wife vowing to 'love, honour and OBEY' but she swears blind it wasn't in the vow.
I think that became an optional part of vows a while back? I might be wrong though "i cant remember my vows now but i know obey wasnt in it | |||
 | |||
| |||
"This isn't an affair site?? Websites don't destroy marriages, people destroy marriages. You haven't got a sexy brain have you OP? It's just a clever name. "Reread his post. He's talking about affair sites, not this one. How's your brain doing today? | |||
| |||
"Personally we are not made to have sex with one person for the rest of our lives. We set up home with our "mate".... Raise a family etc But the sexual desire for others doesn't go away. And it's merely just that "sex". If people talked more openly to one another about their needs/desires/fantasy, then maybe affairs would be a thing of the past? " couldnt bloody agree more, i dont get how someone can love someone enough to want to marry them without being able to discuss sex side of the relationship openly | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"This isn't an affair site?? Websites don't destroy marriages, people destroy marriages. You haven't got a sexy brain have you OP? It's just a clever name. "I just want to clarify before this thread continues that I was not referring to this site, the title refers to a statement I read on an affair sites advert - I hoped my use of inverted commas would have established that, apparently not. And in order to give myself a 'clever' username, wouldn't I have required a certain degree of cleverness to conceive it? | |||
"Also op i think you have a rose spectacle idealistic view of marriage that aint going to happen" I doubt you know a great deal about my views on anything, and likely wouldn't understand even if I attempted to explain them. | |||
| |||
| |||
"Also op i think you have a rose spectacle idealistic view of marriage that aint going to happen I doubt you know a great deal about my views on anything, and likely wouldn't understand even if I attempted to explain them." i base it on what you say in the forums. Unless you say one thing and mean another | |||
"I remember my wife vowing to 'love, honour and OBEY' but she swears blind it wasn't in the vow.
I think that became an optional part of vows a while back? I might be wrong though "I didn't bloody well agree to obey. | |||
"Also op i think you have a rose spectacle idealistic view of marriage that aint going to happen I doubt you know a great deal about my views on anything, and likely wouldn't understand even if I attempted to explain them.i base it on what you say in the forums. Unless you say one thing and mean another" | |||
"I find it easy to stay monogamous in a relationship. Did all my shagging new people in my younger years and it has no appeal to me now. But it has made me more choosey who I wish to settle into a relationship with though. Sex isn't the top of my list what I want out of someone or life anymore. " I'm the same - sex is important to me, but monogomy is a doddle, actually easier for me. | |||
"Also op i think you have a rose spectacle idealistic view of marriage that aint going to happen I doubt you know a great deal about my views on anything, and likely wouldn't understand even if I attempted to explain them.i base it on what you say in the forums. Unless you say one thing and mean another" From the amount of people who misunderstand the vast majority of what I say in the forums, yourself included (the fact that people think the title refers to this particular site being an example), I suggest that your interpretation of my various musings carries little weight. | |||
"I remember my wife vowing to 'love, honour and OBEY' but she swears blind it wasn't in the vow.
I think that became an optional part of vows a while back? I might be wrong though
I didn't bloody well agree to obey. "Just do as yer told woman! | |||
| |||
| |||
"Also op i think you have a rose spectacle idealistic view of marriage that aint going to happen I doubt you know a great deal about my views on anything, and likely wouldn't understand even if I attempted to explain them.i base it on what you say in the forums. Unless you say one thing and mean another From the amount of people who misunderstand the vast majority of what I say in the forums, yourself included (the fact that people think the title refers to this particular site being an example), I suggest that your interpretation of my various musings carries little weight." did i interpret the thread wrong? I just think your going to have a big shock one day when you discover your perfect eutopia isnt so perfect after all | |||
"Also op i think you have a rose spectacle idealistic view of marriage that aint going to happen I doubt you know a great deal about my views on anything, and likely wouldn't understand even if I attempted to explain them.i base it on what you say in the forums. Unless you say one thing and mean another From the amount of people who misunderstand the vast majority of what I say in the forums, yourself included (the fact that people think the title refers to this particular site being an example), I suggest that your interpretation of my various musings carries little weight.did i interpret the thread wrong? I just think your going to have a big shock one day when you discover your perfect eutopia isnt so perfect after all" Again, I refer you to your limited understanding of my views, something your belief that I have a 'Utopia' further highlights. | |||
"Fab won't ruin your marriage. But Cheating on your wife will. Don't be a cunt and you'll be fine " | |||
"Also op i think you have a rose spectacle idealistic view of marriage that aint going to happen I doubt you know a great deal about my views on anything, and likely wouldn't understand even if I attempted to explain them.i base it on what you say in the forums. Unless you say one thing and mean another From the amount of people who misunderstand the vast majority of what I say in the forums, yourself included (the fact that people think the title refers to this particular site being an example), I suggest that your interpretation of my various musings carries little weight.did i interpret the thread wrong? I just think your going to have a big shock one day when you discover your perfect eutopia isnt so perfect after all Again, I refer you to your limited understanding of my views, something your belief that I have a 'Utopia' further highlights." maybe your just not able to put your self across in an understanding way if so many misunderstand you. | |||
"I guess if there was no demand then such sites wouldn't exist? I don't think sites destroy marriages - the parties within it do or one does, if it ends. And people change, life changes. At 20 you might have thought it would be a forever thing but it didn't turn out that way. I've never had an affair - even many years ago when I was unhappily married. But - I can understand how affairs happen. In my 20's I judged people badly for them - age has altered my views. Until you walk a mile in someone else's shoes / you don't really know why they are doing what they do. I'm lucky that I've never been cheated on within a relationship, as far as I've known. If I'd ever been cheated on my view on affairs may be different. Sarah " Thankyou Sarah, probably the most intelligent response I've read so far. I understand what you're saying, you can only really go with what you know in the present, and try your best to make the future work for you. I like the Barry Gibb line 'no matter how the dice may fall, someone else always calls the number'  | |||
"Also op i think you have a rose spectacle idealistic view of marriage that aint going to happen I doubt you know a great deal about my views on anything, and likely wouldn't understand even if I attempted to explain them.i base it on what you say in the forums. Unless you say one thing and mean another From the amount of people who misunderstand the vast majority of what I say in the forums, yourself included (the fact that people think the title refers to this particular site being an example), I suggest that your interpretation of my various musings carries little weight.did i interpret the thread wrong? I just think your going to have a big shock one day when you discover your perfect eutopia isnt so perfect after all Again, I refer you to your limited understanding of my views, something your belief that I have a 'Utopia' further highlights.maybe your just not able to put your self across in an understanding way if so many misunderstand you." Either that or one mans crayons are anothers calligraphy pen. | |||
"I remember my wife vowing to 'love, honour and OBEY' but she swears blind it wasn't in the vow.
I think that became an optional part of vows a while back? I might be wrong though
I didn't bloody well agree to obey.
Just do as yer told woman!"Would you like a sandwich???  | |||
"Also op i think you have a rose spectacle idealistic view of marriage that aint going to happen I doubt you know a great deal about my views on anything, and likely wouldn't understand even if I attempted to explain them.i base it on what you say in the forums. Unless you say one thing and mean another From the amount of people who misunderstand the vast majority of what I say in the forums, yourself included (the fact that people think the title refers to this particular site being an example), I suggest that your interpretation of my various musings carries little weight.did i interpret the thread wrong? I just think your going to have a big shock one day when you discover your perfect eutopia isnt so perfect after all Again, I refer you to your limited understanding of my views, something your belief that I have a 'Utopia' further highlights.maybe your just not able to put your self across in an understanding way if so many misunderstand you. Either that or one mans crayons are anothers calligraphy pen." I like that one. I'm going to nick it | |||
"Also op i think you have a rose spectacle idealistic view of marriage that aint going to happen I doubt you know a great deal about my views on anything, and likely wouldn't understand even if I attempted to explain them.i base it on what you say in the forums. Unless you say one thing and mean another From the amount of people who misunderstand the vast majority of what I say in the forums, yourself included (the fact that people think the title refers to this particular site being an example), I suggest that your interpretation of my various musings carries little weight.did i interpret the thread wrong? I just think your going to have a big shock one day when you discover your perfect eutopia isnt so perfect after all Again, I refer you to your limited understanding of my views, something your belief that I have a 'Utopia' further highlights.maybe your just not able to put your self across in an understanding way if so many misunderstand you. Either that or one mans crayons are anothers calligraphy pen." someone once told me true intelligence is being able to communicate with the masses and theres plenty of intelligent people on here that can do just that | |||
| |||
"........ Does anyone else find these affair sites utterly wretched, horrible little things?..........." Not at all. Theyre swinging sites for singles by any other non sanitised name. There are wretched horrible little people everywhere who would walk over anyone including kids or partners to get their sexual kicks but I doubt the psuedo swing sites have anymore shit houses than honest swinging sites. Sara | |||
"Also op i think you have a rose spectacle idealistic view of marriage that aint going to happen I doubt you know a great deal about my views on anything, and likely wouldn't understand even if I attempted to explain them.i base it on what you say in the forums. Unless you say one thing and mean another From the amount of people who misunderstand the vast majority of what I say in the forums, yourself included (the fact that people think the title refers to this particular site being an example), I suggest that your interpretation of my various musings carries little weight.did i interpret the thread wrong? I just think your going to have a big shock one day when you discover your perfect eutopia isnt so perfect after all Again, I refer you to your limited understanding of my views, something your belief that I have a 'Utopia' further highlights.maybe your just not able to put your self across in an understanding way if so many misunderstand you. Either that or one mans crayons are anothers calligraphy pen. I like that one. I'm going to nick it "If you like that one, describing my thoughts on suits and hats whilst in a tailors: 'What's a Bakewell Tart without the cherry?' | |||
| |||
"This site is a swinging site. Not specifically targeted at people wishing to cheat (there are such sites I am aware off). So this site will not ruin your marriage (should you have one). How you use this site may." Damned right. It is Fabswingers.c not cheatingbastards.com!!  It is down to individuals how they conduct themselves. | |||
| |||
"This site is a swinging site. Not specifically targeted at people wishing to cheat (there are such sites I am aware off). So this site will not ruin your marriage (should you have one). How you use this site may.Damned right. It is Fabswingers.c not cheatingbastards.com!! It is down to individuals how they conduct themselves. "Yeah but those other sites are damn expensive  | |||
"I remember my wife vowing to 'love, honour and OBEY' but she swears blind it wasn't in the vow.
I think that became an optional part of vows a while back? I might be wrong though
I didn't bloody well agree to obey.
Just do as yer told woman!
Would you like a sandwich??? "There's a choice of arsenic or strychnine.  | |||
| |||
"I understand your point OP, but I must ask have you ever been married? Your description of marriage in the op is somewhat 'perfect' and is wonderful as an ideal but in my experience and those of approximately half of everyone who does take the plunge, it doesn't work out like that. I agree that that the marketing is unsavoury and lacks taste but then at the same time many people are unsavoury and lack taste." This is why I've never married and it's not something that I personally find necessary. | |||
"I understand your point OP, but I must ask have you ever been married? Your description of marriage in the op is somewhat 'perfect' and is wonderful as an ideal but in my experience and those of approximately half of everyone who does take the plunge, it doesn't work out like that. I agree that that the marketing is unsavoury and lacks taste but then at the same time many people are unsavoury and lack taste." No I've never been married, I've never eaten a Kobe burger either but they do look nice. If you read my statement about marriage again, you'll see I don't make any direct claims about it's perfection, only the ideal, and my disappointment in peoples so frequent inability (though I appreciate we're all fallible, I know this all too well myself) to work toward that ideal. I agree with your thoughts on bad taste too, rather like the fact that death is inevitable but that's no excuse to play football with human heads. | |||
"Firstly yes, I enjoy watching porn, hence my encounters with such adverts. Does anyone else find these affair sites utterly wretched, horrible little things? I mean, perhaps I'm being a little naïve here, but I was always taught that marriage constitutes a willing agreement, based upon love between a man and a woman, who have made the decision to spend their lives together, to honour and support one another, to maintain a bond of love and trust so they can build a better life together, possibly even raise a family, I was taught that marriage is a wonderful and beautiful thing, and even to my (sometimes excessively) analytical mind, it still is. So why is it then, that not only do these sites exist, they actually portray marriage as some kind of bad, cloying little thing that you'll feel so much better for being rid of, you know, so you can feel sexy and ALIVE again, like lancing a nasty boil. Didn't you enter into yours willingly, or your own volition? Didn't you look into your partners eyes, didn't you see love in there, didn't you feel it too when you said 'I do', and made that commitment to them?" OP, I'm really not too sure what you are on about. Firstly Fab Swingers is not an 'affair' site, it's a swinging site. There are various definitions of swinging, but they tend to be along the lines of consenting couples looking for sexual experiences in addition to their marriage, usually by a partner swap, or by inviting an single person to join. An affair is when someone goes behind their partners back, and which is not the focus of this website. With regards to your description of what marriage should be ie loving, honouring, supporting, maintaining a bond, building a life together, raising a family. Well, in what way do you feel consenting swinging couples don't achieve those values? I think you've misunderstood this site if you feel the general ethos is to portray marriage as 'bad' and that 'you'll feel so much better for being rid of it'. In all our time on the swing scene, mixing with a variety of happily married couples I have never got the impression that Fab is portraying marriage negatively. Finally, with regards to your last paragraph. Yes we did look into each other's eyes, yes we did see the love in there, and feel it when we said 'I do', and ,add that commitment. But what has that got to do with our mutual decision to explore our sexuality by involving other people? If you personally think that swinging is unethical or immoral, you are very much entitled to your opinion - an opinion which is probably shared by the majority of non-swingers. But if that's the case, why on earth are you on this site? We're pretty happy with our marriage. With have a full life, or which swinging is one of the things we enjoy. | |||
| |||
"I understand your point OP, but I must ask have you ever been married? Your description of marriage in the op is somewhat 'perfect' and is wonderful as an ideal but in my experience and those of approximately half of everyone who does take the plunge, it doesn't work out like that. I agree that that the marketing is unsavoury and lacks taste but then at the same time many people are unsavoury and lack taste. No I've never been married, I've never eaten a Kobe burger either but they do look nice. If you read my statement about marriage again, you'll see I don't make any direct claims about it's perfection, only the ideal, and my disappointment in peoples so frequent inability (though I appreciate we're all fallible, I know this all too well myself) to work toward that ideal. I agree with your thoughts on bad taste too, rather like the fact that death is inevitable but that's no excuse to play football with human heads." Yes, I get your point but with all due respect I don't think you can't understand a marriage dynamic until you've lived it. Until you've eaten the Kobe burger it's all just an idea you have about its taste texture and how satisfying it is. It seems an awful lot like you're 'not making any direct claims' about a great deal of your op... Normally I have a great deal of respect for your posts and comments but I think on this point you're making a great deal of noise about something you know nothing about. It's like you commenting on Italy's foreign policy, irrelevant and pointless | |||
| |||
| |||
"We have been part of the swinging lifestyle for 10 years now and after much consideration we decided that our marriage was strong, built on complete openness, trust, respect and empathy for each other; we had and continue to have a fantastic sex life and loving relationship and see this lifestyle as an extension to our relationship that we dip into as and when we choose. Over the 10 years our relationship has gone from strength to strength and swinging has been a part of that. We would never recommend anyone to start this lifestyle unless they have a strong relationship, with both partners being comfortable with the decision. Really don't understand the affairs comment as swinging is about openness and therefore affairs shouldn't really be part of the lifestyle, although I appreciate that people will always abuse a situation if it suits their agenda. Therefore for me this or other swinging sites cannot be held responsible for the personal decisions of individuals who chose to use it inappropriately. There are affairs and sex sites available for such liaisons. Anyway a little waffle but hope the point came across. Have fun out there xxx" Sounds like you guys have a wonderful marriage | |||
"We have been part of the swinging lifestyle for 10 years now and after much consideration we decided that our marriage was strong, built on complete openness, trust, respect and empathy for each other; we had and continue to have a fantastic sex life and loving relationship and see this lifestyle as an extension to our relationship that we dip into as and when we choose. Over the 10 years our relationship has gone from strength to strength and swinging has been a part of that. We would never recommend anyone to start this lifestyle unless they have a strong relationship, with both partners being comfortable with the decision. Really don't understand the affairs comment as swinging is about openness and therefore affairs shouldn't really be part of the lifestyle, although I appreciate that people will always abuse a situation if it suits their agenda. Therefore for me this or other swinging sites cannot be held responsible for the personal decisions of individuals who chose to use it inappropriately. There are affairs and sex sites available for such liaisons. Anyway a little waffle but hope the point came across. Have fun out there xxx Sounds like you guys have a wonderful marriage "We like it lol...thank you for the comment xxx | |||
| |||
"Normally I have a great deal of respect for your posts and comments but I think on this point you're making a great deal of noise about something you know nothing about. It's like you commenting on Italy's foreign policy, irrelevant and pointless" I figured this would be your go to, hence my pre-emptive statement about the burger. Yes they're two different things, but in order for me to even see the promise of the burger, there must first be some part of it that resonates with me, after all, were I vegan, the thought of eating one would probably make me feel sick. I respect your views and thought's too, but sorry, this whole 'you've never experienced it therefore you know nothing about it' standpoint smacks of a cop out to me, and one I hear used in debate all to often as people attempt to retreat behind their perceived esotericism - returning to the burger, you don't have to have actually tasted it yourself to realise something about it. Besides, how do you know I lack knowledge of Italys foreign policy...have you ever discussed the subject with me? You're making a more groundless assumption there than you're accusing me of... "p.s. I think you should have a daily column as you're observations are always thought provoking in a refreshing way "Thankyou Scarlet, to be honest, I don't actually mind if people disagree with me so long as they do so respectfully, and don't attempt to insult my intelligence x | |||
"Op some marketing maybe tasteless encouragement to cheat. But i doubt anyone who wasny going to cheat anyway would do so based on a couple of adverts. As for marriage being a happily ever after...no chance marriage is different for everyone. But id bet money for most its a commiment thats takes work, compromise and communication. Just like any relationship the vows dont entitle the rest of the world to judge all of a sudden. So they have vowed those things before the eyes of god. Marriages and people change. A lack of affection and sex and expecting the other half to put up with it to me is breaking the love and cherish vow. No to have and to hold there...So why is that ok to break? I say im married here cause its an easier definition of how i consider my relationship. But when i signed up for this relationship i did not agree kissing would stop or sex would be annually. I would be made to feel unattractive and rejected constantly etc. Im not justifying cheating as i have permission but i still consider myself a cheat. I do however see it as one of many possible consequences for lack of a physical side to my relationship. And thr blame for that sits equally at my partners door as mine..." I think this is extremely well said. A lot of people forget that marriage is a two way process and are quick to hurl blame at the so called 'cheating' partner, when that partner may have been denied sex and affection, through no fault of their own. What is someone supposed to do in a sexless marriage - be celebate? | |||
"Op some marketing maybe tasteless encouragement to cheat. But i doubt anyone who wasny going to cheat anyway would do so based on a couple of adverts. As for marriage being a happily ever after...no chance marriage is different for everyone. But id bet money for most its a commiment thats takes work, compromise and communication. Just like any relationship the vows dont entitle the rest of the world to judge all of a sudden. So they have vowed those things before the eyes of god. Marriages and people change. A lack of affection and sex and expecting the other half to put up with it to me is breaking the love and cherish vow. No to have and to hold there...So why is that ok to break? I say im married here cause its an easier definition of how i consider my relationship. But when i signed up for this relationship i did not agree kissing would stop or sex would be annually. I would be made to feel unattractive and rejected constantly etc. Im not justifying cheating as i have permission but i still consider myself a cheat. I do however see it as one of many possible consequences for lack of a physical side to my relationship. And thr blame for that sits equally at my partners door as mine..." Thank you for this post…really, truly…it made me cry. I've suffered for years after ending a marriage like this | |||
"Op some marketing maybe tasteless encouragement to cheat. But i doubt anyone who wasny going to cheat anyway would do so based on a couple of adverts. As for marriage being a happily ever after...no chance marriage is different for everyone. But id bet money for most its a commiment thats takes work, compromise and communication. Just like any relationship the vows dont entitle the rest of the world to judge all of a sudden. So they have vowed those things before the eyes of god. Marriages and people change. A lack of affection and sex and expecting the other half to put up with it to me is breaking the love and cherish vow. No to have and to hold there...So why is that ok to break? I say im married here cause its an easier definition of how i consider my relationship. But when i signed up for this relationship i did not agree kissing would stop or sex would be annually. I would be made to feel unattractive and rejected constantly etc. Im not justifying cheating as i have permission but i still consider myself a cheat. I do however see it as one of many possible consequences for lack of a physical side to my relationship. And thr blame for that sits equally at my partners door as mine... Thank you for this post…really, truly…it made me cry. I've suffered for years after ending a marriage like this "Your welcome the presumption that cheats are all just greedy drives me mad. Xx | |||
| |||
"Normally I have a great deal of respect for your posts and comments but I think on this point you're making a great deal of noise about something you know nothing about. It's like you commenting on Italy's foreign policy, irrelevant and pointless I figured this would be your go to, hence my pre-emptive statement about the burger. Yes they're two different things, but in order for me to even see the promise of the burger, there must first be some part of it that resonates with me, after all, were I vegan, the thought of eating one would probably make me feel sick. I respect your views and thought's too, but sorry, this whole 'you've never experienced it therefore you know nothing about it' standpoint smacks of a cop out to me, and one I hear used in debate all to often as people attempt to retreat behind their perceived esotericism - returning to the burger, you don't have to have actually tasted it yourself to realise something about it. Besides, how do you know I lack knowledge of Italys foreign policy...have you ever discussed the subject with me? You're making a more groundless assumption there than you're accusing me of... p.s. I think you should have a daily column as you're observations are always thought provoking in a refreshing way
Thankyou Scarlet, to be honest, I don't actually mind if people disagree with me so long as they do so respectfully, and don't attempt to insult my intelligence x"I'm not retreating behind anything, I'm simply saying if you've not experienced it you simply don't know. No amount of thought or introspection will inform you of how a marriage going bad feels. I'm not trying to insult your intelligence so please don't insult mine, I was using the Italy reference as an example as I'm sure you know. I'm out of this discussion as you seem intent on insulting people's intelligence rather than discussing your topic | |||
| |||
"Op some marketing maybe tasteless encouragement to cheat. But i doubt anyone who wasny going to cheat anyway would do so based on a couple of adverts. As for marriage being a happily ever after...no chance marriage is different for everyone. But id bet money for most its a commiment thats takes work, compromise and communication. Just like any relationship the vows dont entitle the rest of the world to judge all of a sudden. So they have vowed those things before the eyes of god. Marriages and people change. A lack of affection and sex and expecting the other half to put up with it to me is breaking the love and cherish vow. No to have and to hold there...So why is that ok to break? I say im married here cause its an easier definition of how i consider my relationship. But when i signed up for this relationship i did not agree kissing would stop or sex would be annually. I would be made to feel unattractive and rejected constantly etc. Im not justifying cheating as i have permission but i still consider myself a cheat. I do however see it as one of many possible consequences for lack of a physical side to my relationship. And thr blame for that sits equally at my partners door as mine... Thank you for this post…really, truly…it made me cry. I've suffered for years after ending a marriage like this
Your welcome the presumption that cheats are all just greedy drives me mad. Xx"Me too. It's viewed by some in black & white, there's a whole massive grey area inbetween that's often overlooked. | |||
| |||
"I remember my wife vowing to 'love, honour and OBEY' but she swears blind it wasn't in the vow.
I think that became an optional part of vows a while back? I might be wrong though
I didn't bloody well agree to obey.
Just do as yer told woman!
Would you like a sandwich???
There's a choice of arsenic or strychnine. "Sammich and a beer, and both of you bring it naked, I'm not gonna ask where you've put the bottle opener... | |||
| |||
| |||
"Everybody deserves a sex life" Even me ? | |||
 | |||
| |||
| |||
"Can people even read the OP? It is clear he is referring to adverts for the adultery websites, not this site. I despair. "Welcome to my world - tea? x | |||
"Can people even read the OP? It is clear he is referring to adverts for the adultery websites, not this site. I despair.
Welcome to my world - tea? x"Any time. x | |||
 | |||
"If your not getting sex in the marriage you will get it outside of the marriage, men and women have been doing this for years, "Depends on the person. Some need extra or different sex even if the sex in the marriage is good and frequent. | |||
"Fab won't ruin your marriage. But Cheating on your wife will. Don't be a cunt and you'll be fine " totally agree | |||
"We all have different reasons for being on here or any other site, but who are we to say if it's right or wrong until you've walked in that person's shoes." Agree | |||
"If your not getting sex in the marriage you will get it outside of the marriage, men and women have been doing this for years,
Depends on the person.
Some need extra or different sex even if the sex in the marriage is good and frequent. "And there are some who love their partners above themselves. | |||
"Firstly yes, I enjoy watching porn, hence my encounters with such adverts. Does anyone else find these affair sites utterly wretched, horrible little things? I mean, perhaps I'm being a little naïve here, but I was always taught that marriage constitutes a willing agreement, based upon love between a man and a woman, who have made the decision to spend their lives together, to honour and support one another, to maintain a bond of love and trust so they can build a better life together, possibly even raise a family, I was taught that marriage is a wonderful and beautiful thing, and even to my (sometimes excessively) analytical mind, it still is. So why is it then, that not only do these sites exist, they actually portray marriage as some kind of bad, cloying little thing that you'll feel so much better for being rid of, you know, so you can feel sexy and ALIVE again, like lancing a nasty boil. Didn't you enter into yours willingly, or your own volition? Didn't you look into your partners eyes, didn't you see love in there, didn't you feel it too when you said 'I do', and made that commitment to them?" No maybe about it. It is a very 'naive' view about 'marriage'. Not too far removed from my beliefs as a child. Life teaches. | |||
"I can't agree with the statement that everyone deserves a sex life. Sex isn't on any list of needs. Love maybe... No one died from not having sex and apart from anything else if you are for e.g overworked, over busy , over stressed, under threat..... the feelings for sex are over ridden by simple survival. Sex is often over ridden by hungers.... There are greater needs. No one feels horny running from dinosaurs. " There are indeed greater needs than sex, and sex is not usually a desire when basic survival is at stake. But when life is comfortable and everybody is happy and healthy, the moral question is possible or reasonable to be celebate? Many can, but others do feel they 'need' sex, for want of a better word. Personally I don't think I could be celebate, however hard I tried, but I'm very lucky that I don't have to. | |||
"I can't agree with the statement that everyone deserves a sex life. Sex isn't on any list of needs. Love maybe... No one died from not having sex and apart from anything else if you are for e.g overworked, over busy , over stressed, under threat..... the feelings for sex are over ridden by simple survival. Sex is often over ridden by hungers.... There are greater needs. No one feels horny running from dinosaurs. There are indeed greater needs than sex, and sex is not usually a desire when basic survival is at stake. But when life is comfortable and everybody is happy and healthy, the moral question is possible or reasonable to be celebate? Many can, but others do feel they 'need' sex, for want of a better word. Personally I don't think I could be celebate, however hard I tried, but I'm very lucky that I don't have to." Agreed. It's always a lazy warm day that gets me thinking ..... | |||
"Firstly yes, I enjoy watching porn, hence my encounters with such adverts. Does anyone else find these affair sites utterly wretched, horrible little things? I mean, perhaps I'm being a little naïve here, but I was always taught that marriage constitutes a willing agreement, based upon love between a man and a woman, who have made the decision to spend their lives together, to honour and support one another, to maintain a bond of love and trust so they can build a better life together, possibly even raise a family, I was taught that marriage is a wonderful and beautiful thing, and even to my (sometimes excessively) analytical mind, it still is. So why is it then, that not only do these sites exist, they actually portray marriage as some kind of bad, cloying little thing that you'll feel so much better for being rid of, you know, so you can feel sexy and ALIVE again, like lancing a nasty boil. Didn't you enter into yours willingly, or your own volition? Didn't you look into your partners eyes, didn't you see love in there, didn't you feel it too when you said 'I do', and made that commitment to them?" What a naïve and narrow minded view point. My wife and I love each other, she is my soul mate, my friend, my lover, my world. She feels the same. We both enjoy sex and treat each swinging session as pure physical enjoyment. Nothing else. We dont start getting luvy duvy with anyone, just enjoy the fun, release, orgasmic pleasure of sex. That's all. Where is the problem? | |||
| |||
| |||
"I can't agree with the statement that everyone deserves a sex life. Sex isn't on any list of needs. Love maybe... No one died from not having sex and apart from anything else if you are for e.g overworked, over busy , over stressed, under threat..... the feelings for sex are over ridden by simple survival. Sex is often over ridden by hungers.... There are greater needs. No one feels horny running from dinosaurs. " Not wanting to be argumentative but sex is psychologically believed to be important and appears on the professionally accepted model of Maslows hierarchy list of needs as a basic human need. Anyway this is stepping away a little from the post but just thought it was important to share. Have fun out there X | |||
"I can't agree with the statement that everyone deserves a sex life. Sex isn't on any list of needs. Love maybe... No one died from not having sex and apart from anything else if you are for e.g overworked, over busy , over stressed, under threat..... the feelings for sex are over ridden by simple survival. Sex is often over ridden by hungers.... There are greater needs. No one feels horny running from dinosaurs. Not wanting to be argumentative but sex is psychologically believed to be important and appears on the professionally accepted model of Maslows hierarchy list of needs as a basic human need. Anyway this is stepping away a little from the post but just thought it was important to share. Have fun out there X " Which value set is Maslow's Hierarchy based on? The Buddhists don't believe we even have any physical needs, even | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"Firstly yes, I enjoy watching porn, hence my encounters with such adverts. Does anyone else find these affair sites utterly wretched, horrible little things? I mean, perhaps I'm being a little naïve here, but I was always taught that marriage constitutes a willing agreement, based upon love between a man and a woman, who have made the decision to spend their lives together, to honour and support one another, to maintain a bond of love and trust so they can build a better life together, possibly even raise a family, I was taught that marriage is a wonderful and beautiful thing, and even to my (sometimes excessively) analytical mind, it still is. So why is it then, that not only do these sites exist, they actually portray marriage as some kind of bad, cloying little thing that you'll feel so much better for being rid of, you know, so you can feel sexy and ALIVE again, like lancing a nasty boil. Didn't you enter into yours willingly, or your own volition? Didn't you look into your partners eyes, didn't you see love in there, didn't you feel it too when you said 'I do', and made that commitment to them?" I thought this was a swingers site not an affair site. Me and my partner use this site together as a couple. We made the decision together. We would never dream about playing with out each other. To us this site is sex toy. I trust him with all my heart and soul and I know he trusts me the same. We have every intention of spending rest of our lifes together. If at any point either of us didn't want to use this site any more then we would both stop using it totally and wouldn't look back. X | |||
"I can't agree with the statement that everyone deserves a sex life. Sex isn't on any list of needs. Love maybe... No one died from not having sex and apart from anything else if you are for e.g overworked, over busy , over stressed, under threat..... the feelings for sex are over ridden by simple survival. Sex is often over ridden by hungers.... There are greater needs. No one feels horny running from dinosaurs. Not wanting to be argumentative but sex is psychologically believed to be important and appears on the professionally accepted model of Maslows hierarchy list of needs as a basic human need. Anyway this is stepping away a little from the post but just thought it was important to share. Have fun out there X Which value set is Maslow's Hierarchy based on? The Buddhists don't believe we even have any physical needs, even "Have to be honest that I work closely with several religious groups including Buddhists and sex amoung other things is seen as a basic requirement but it's important not to indulge beyond base requirement, being celibate and moving away from physical needs is generally practiced it the monastics orders (like most religions). I think this is a good point and would make a great thread, but is best moved away from this one as its moving away from the OP. Nice to have lots of views out there though. Have fun xxx | |||
"Don't be a cunt and you'll be fine" | |||
"Don't be a cunt and you'll be fine "Pulls up a chair, reaches for popcorn ... | |||
"Firstly yes, I enjoy watching porn, hence my encounters with such adverts. Does anyone else find these affair sites utterly wretched, horrible little things? I mean, perhaps I'm being a little naïve here, but I was always taught that marriage constitutes a willing agreement, based upon love between a man and a woman, who have made the decision to spend their lives together, to honour and support one another, to maintain a bond of love and trust so they can build a better life together, possibly even raise a family, I was taught that marriage is a wonderful and beautiful thing, and even to my (sometimes excessively) analytical mind, it still is. So why is it then, that not only do these sites exist, they actually portray marriage as some kind of bad, cloying little thing that you'll feel so much better for being rid of, you know, so you can feel sexy and ALIVE again, like lancing a nasty boil. Didn't you enter into yours willingly, or your own volition? Didn't you look into your partners eyes, didn't you see love in there, didn't you feel it too when you said 'I do', and made that commitment to them? I thought this was a swingers site not an affair site. Me and my partner use this site together as a couple. We made the decision together. We would never dream about playing with out each other. To us this site is sex toy. I trust him with all my heart and soul and I know he trusts me the same. We have every intention of spending rest of our lifes together. If at any point either of us didn't want to use this site any more then we would both stop using it totally and wouldn't look back. X" | |||
"Personally we are not made to have sex with one person for the rest of our lives. We set up home with our "mate".... Raise a family etc But the sexual desire for others doesn't go away. And it's merely just that "sex". If people talked more openly to one another about their needs/desires/fantasy, then maybe affairs would be a thing of the past? " Fully agree, monogamy doesn't work that's why so many people cheat. Sex and love are two different things. | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
