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Vanilla Swinging
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Maybe it is just me but there seems to be a lot of swinging that aside from the swinging is actually just vanilla sex with someone else.
I'd rather not swing and be a kinky fucker with toys, restraints, fetish wear, equipment and imagination than have multiple vanilla fucks.
Are u a vanilla swinger  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe it is just me but there seems to be a lot of swinging that aside from the swinging is actually just vanilla sex with someone else.
I'd rather not swing and be a kinky fucker with toys, restraints, fetish wear, equipment and imagination than have multiple vanilla fucks.
Are u a vanilla swinger "
Vanilla as in no fetish and no kinks? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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whats wrong with 'vanilla' if its that persons preference?.. if it works for them then who is anyone else to judge.
by a lot of peoples standards i could be seen as Vanilla but im happy enough. |
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Aside the obvious deviation form the norm that some see us as, we are petty much vanilla.
I love seeing the variety and complexity of the sexuality of others but we fullfil ourselves entirely with resorting to "gimmicks".
(Don't take the use of the word gimmick the wrong way, it's not intended as a slight) |
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Swinging doesn't have to be kinky, swinging is just sex. The kink comes from the BDSM crossover.
Just because you swing doesn't mean you like bondage, Taking it up the are while dressed like a teddy bear with pegs inyourrinning nipples |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe it is just me but there seems to be a lot of swinging that aside from the swinging is actually just vanilla sex with someone else.
I'd rather not swing and be a kinky fucker with toys, restraints, fetish wear, equipment and imagination than have multiple vanilla fucks.
Are u a vanilla swinger "
That might be Your definition but it isn't mine x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"whats wrong with 'vanilla' if its that persons preference?.. if it works for them then who is anyone else to judge.
by a lot of peoples standards i could be seen as Vanilla but im happy enough."
This  . It's two different worlds that sometimes mix. Whatever works for "you" is right. |
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Wee a soft swap couple that do everything with a couple from kissing all the way too oral be mff fmm mmff just the intercourse stays with own partners she's just more bi then male play but doesn't mind just our way had no problems with it the amount of meets we've had over the years |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe it is just me but there seems to be a lot of swinging that aside from the swinging is actually just vanilla sex with someone else.
I'd rather not swing and be a kinky fucker with toys, restraints, fetish wear, equipment and imagination than have multiple vanilla fucks.
Are u a vanilla swinger "
I wouldnt say i am vanilla but also not experienced in things too BDSM, although not adverse to learn x |
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"Not at all. U see it as a gimmick and others see it as a way of experiencing beyond the normal mental and physical stimuli of sex."
You did read the bit where I pointed out that my use of the word gimmick was not
Intended to be offensive, right?
I just couldn't think is another way to phrase it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Swinging doesn't have to be kinky, swinging is just sex. The kink comes from the BDSM crossover.
Just because you swing doesn't mean you like bondage, Taking it up the arse while dressed like a teddy bear with pegs in your nipples"
Couldn't have said it better myself. I'm coming to the conclusion that quite a lot of people think swingers and people who have sex with multiple partners are deviants,sluts,Doms,freaks etc. Some people just want sex without the kink. |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"Swinging doesn't have to be kinky, swinging is just sex. The kink comes from the BDSM crossover.
Just because you swing doesn't mean you like bondage, Taking it up the are while dressed like a teddy bear with pegs inyourrinning nipples"
I prefer to be dressed as a turkey, personally.   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Morning , I'm on Fet also & love BDSM, but like a bit of Vanilla too.
It all depends what I feel at the time & what I need.
You can have a great mix of both |
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I gues it depends what you class as vanilla as well.
If the acts are standard straight, bi or gay sex I would call it vanilla.
Tonight we will have vanilla sex. That's me, Erika, 4 or 5 Filipino ladyboys, several lesbian and bi women and a couple of cute straight young twinks who won't know what hit them.
Just another boring Friday night with no kinky stuff in sight. |
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"Swinging doesn't have to be kinky, swinging is just sex. The kink comes from the BDSM crossover.
Just because you swing doesn't mean you like bondage, Taking it up the arse while dressed like a teddy bear with pegs in your nipples
Couldn't have said it better myself. I'm coming to the conclusion that quite a lot of people think swingers and people who have sex with multiple partners are deviants,sluts,Doms,freaks etc. Some people just want sex without the kink. "
Thanks for fixing my typos |
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By *albec26Man
over a year ago
Great Yarmouth |
"Swinging doesn't have to be kinky, swinging is just sex. The kink comes from the BDSM crossover.
Just because you swing doesn't mean you like bondage, Taking it up the are while dressed like a teddy bear with pegs inyourrinning nipples
I prefer to be dressed as a turkey, personally. "
Maybe we should get together as Kat has the brussel sprout costume and I like to dress as a Yorkshire pudding |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Not at all. U see it as a gimmick and others see it as a way of experiencing beyond the normal mental and physical stimuli of sex.
You did read the bit where I pointed out that my use of the word gimmick was not
Intended to be offensive, right?
I just couldn't think is another way to phrase it. "
I did. That's why I said not at all. As in no offense taken. To each their own |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I gues it depends what you class as vanilla as well.
If the acts are standard straight, bi or gay sex I would call it vanilla.
Tonight we will have vanilla sex. That's me, Erika, 4 or 5 Filipino ladyboys, several lesbian and bi women and a couple of cute straight young twinks who won't know what hit them.
Just another boring Friday night with no kinky stuff in sight. "
Lol your so vanilla but bloody lovely xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Swinging is just swinging - multiple partners/partner swapping.
Fetish and BSDM are exactly that.
I don't have a problem with people who do both.
But it really bugs me when people expect me or want to push me past being vanilla just because I'm on this site. The first ever meet I had here, the guy turned up and the first thing he said was "Hi". The second thing he said was "So how kinky are you?".
It really put me off to be honest because I felt I couldn't possibly live up to his expectations.
I might have to start calling myself vanilla hotwife. And putting vanilla all over my profile. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I love kink I love rope work but I have to be in a complete different mind set and kink is spur of the moment in the moment type thing but not an everyday occurance. "
See I'm like u but I'd say that kink was more carefully planned and not at all spur of the moment because u have to know ur partners limits and they have to know urs. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh it's not a criticism. To each their own and I am on fet. It was just an observation."
To be honest your opening post sounded critical and judgemental. You were clearly using the term vanilla in a negative context |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
I suppose it depends on your definition of vanilla.
We have never introduced BDSM in any swinging meets we have had and I wouldn't have described them as vanilla as my definition of group sex isn't vanilla.
Either way, whatever someone is getting up to on this site or any site doesn't matter to me what they call it as long as they are having as much fun as we have had in the past |
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Surely its about meeting like minded and compatable people. As long as where all meeting people that are looking for the same as us. Doesnt bloody matter what you do whether its lying having a cuddle or those most bizzare sex act if thats what the people involved want.
Something for everyone here |
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I have a brilliant sex life with the lovely lady I've got but i have a weakness for naughty women, we (me & Kim) were both serial shaggers when we met which is why we swing now to quench this thirst.
We do try to keep things vanilla sometimes...well we try our hardest lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe it is just me but there seems to be a lot of swinging that aside from the swinging is actually just vanilla sex with someone else.
I'd rather not swing and be a kinky fucker with toys, restraints, fetish wear, equipment and imagination than have multiple vanilla fucks.
Are u a vanilla swinger "
Being into swing and BDSM, I thought I'd shove my two pennies worth in.
For me, I've noticed a lot of single people on the swing scene are seeking no strings attached, physical experience where each party can come and go as they please with no responsibility or relationship, for couples, they have their relationship and enjoy the freedom that swinging brings but a lot seem to keep the kink to themselves and "play vanilla".
The BDSM scene is full of various kinks, fetishes and roles to discover but many require a partner/partners to explore with. Switches, Dom/sub, Master/slave, rigger/rope slut/ Trainer/pet. These things require a bond, a level of trust and respect, and a commitment to the dynamic. Especially if you are venturing into the mental aspects of play. Bruises heal on the body, but to give yourself on a deeper mental level requires building the trust up. For example, I couldn't submit to someone who was in and out of my life like a yo-yo because as a sub, I would require consistency.
Maybe people on a swing site don't always want to give that much of themselves without building that bridge first.
I've met many people who thought I was " vanilla", but truthfully it just takes me a little bit of time to unpack the kink lol x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I think u have hit the nail on the head. Random one nighters are never going to get the same trust level as a proper bdsm relationship.
Obviously there are some swinging bdsmers on here but mainly that I have seen it is subs looks to be used at their doms request. |
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"Maybe it is just me but there seems to be a lot of swinging that aside from the swinging is actually just vanilla sex with someone else.
I'd rather not swing and be a kinky fucker with toys, restraints, fetish wear, equipment and imagination than have multiple vanilla fucks.
Are u a vanilla swinger
Being into swing and BDSM, I thought I'd shove my two pennies worth in.
For me, I've noticed a lot of single people on the swing scene are seeking no strings attached, physical experience where each party can come and go as they please with no responsibility or relationship, for couples, they have their relationship and enjoy the freedom that swinging brings but a lot seem to keep the kink to themselves and "play vanilla".
The BDSM scene is full of various kinks, fetishes and roles to discover but many require a partner/partners to explore with. Switches, Dom/sub, Master/slave, rigger/rope slut/ Trainer/pet. These things require a bond, a level of trust and respect, and a commitment to the dynamic. Especially if you are venturing into the mental aspects of play. Bruises heal on the body, but to give yourself on a deeper mental level requires building the trust up. For example, I couldn't submit to someone who was in and out of my life like a yo-yo because as a sub, I would require consistency.
Maybe people on a swing site don't always want to give that much of themselves without building that bridge first.
I've met many people who thought I was " vanilla", but truthfully it just takes me a little bit of time to unpack the kink lol x"
and that is why they are on a swingers site and not a bdsm site. Surely you go where your needs are |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We aren't into bdsm , so we would be vanilla swingers I guess .....since i found out id done half the things on your bucket list i think your the most vanilla couple i know  "
We are getting through the bucket list .... 
Vanilla with a sprinkle of kink perhaps |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe it is just me but there seems to be a lot of swinging that aside from the swinging is actually just vanilla sex with someone else.
I'd rather not swing and be a kinky fucker with toys, restraints, fetish wear, equipment and imagination than have multiple vanilla fucks.
Are u a vanilla swinger
Being into swing and BDSM, I thought I'd shove my two pennies worth in.
For me, I've noticed a lot of single people on the swing scene are seeking no strings attached, physical experience where each party can come and go as they please with no responsibility or relationship, for couples, they have their relationship and enjoy the freedom that swinging brings but a lot seem to keep the kink to themselves and "play vanilla".
The BDSM scene is full of various kinks, fetishes and roles to discover but many require a partner/partners to explore with. Switches, Dom/sub, Master/slave, rigger/rope slut/ Trainer/pet. These things require a bond, a level of trust and respect, and a commitment to the dynamic. Especially if you are venturing into the mental aspects of play. Bruises heal on the body, but to give yourself on a deeper mental level requires building the trust up. For example, I couldn't submit to someone who was in and out of my life like a yo-yo because as a sub, I would require consistency.
Maybe people on a swing site don't always want to give that much of themselves without building that bridge first.
I've met many people who thought I was " vanilla", but truthfully it just takes me a little bit of time to unpack the kink lol xand that is why they are on a swingers site and not a bdsm site. Surely you go where your needs are"
Exactly, the two are completely different. On another site, I've been on there about 3 years and only met a handful of people but done some very "intimate" things, whereas on here I meet lots of people, have a bit of fun and only really with regular people does the kink develop if we both have an interest in it. I'm mostly here for the fun and like to keep it simple lol x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We enjoy playing with toys etc. But we also enjoy just meeting other couples for sex, but it's hardly vanilla to have 4 people in a room having sex and the women also enjoying eachother, to me vanilla is one man, one woman, missionary, kinky doesn't have to involve toys or props either, it can be erotic massage, it can be teasing, it can be enforced silence, mental stimulus over physically using ties and toys etc. It's all up to you. But swinging with just sex isn't vanilla at all lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why do labels need to be attached? To label something as vanilla is meant to be classed as ordinary... I'm not sure anyone who has met on here is 'vanilla' just by being on this site. I'm not interested in bring tied to a table as I'm whipped and fucked... But I'm far from vanilla... I just love sex... And lots of it please |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Swinging isn't vanilla. Even if it's just 2 singles meeting. "
So 2 singles meet on a dating site and that's vanilla. But they meet on here and that's not vanilla. How so? Cos of the name of the site? |
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"Maybe it is just me but there seems to be a lot of swinging that aside from the swinging is actually just vanilla sex with someone else.
I'd rather not swing and be a kinky fucker with toys, restraints, fetish wear, equipment and imagination than have multiple vanilla fucks.
Are u a vanilla swinger "
I suspect you're confusing swinging with "two single people" meeting up for sex.
I'm not sure you can really describe partner swapping & sharing that defines swinging as particularly vanilla.
Cal |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Swinging isn't vanilla. Even if it's just 2 singles meeting.
So 2 singles meet on a dating site and that's vanilla. But they meet on here and that's not vanilla. How so? Cos of the name of the site?"
Swingers can meet on dating sites too. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
I'm not sure you can really describe partner swapping & sharing that defines swinging as particularly vanilla.
Cal"
But two singles who are only meeting each other arent swapping are they? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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pretty much been vanilla swinging, its not been disappointing but i want something more than that. nobody makes the effort hardly to get to know you before wanting other things so i go without, not too bothered coz i love sex anyway but i've stopped meeting for sex while i work out a way to get exactly what i want.
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"Maybe it is just me but there seems to be a lot of swinging that aside from the swinging is actually just vanilla sex with someone else.
I'd rather not swing and be a kinky fucker with toys, restraints, fetish wear, equipment and imagination than have multiple vanilla fucks.
Are u a vanilla swinger "
This is why we don't go to most clubs, we see it as too vanilla, straight oriented. Our sex, between us, can be vanilla, but is also lots of other things. Not into BDSM, but watersports, although we don't do this all the time .... |
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"I love threesomes too much to be vanilla "
I think threesomes can still be vanilla, if its just boring sex. I had threesomes when I was younger which were too vanilla for me because the men wouldn't play with each other. that left me gobsmacked at the age of twenty ..,, |
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