FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Can I please have
Can I please have
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
So I'm poorly and this is my second day sofa bound.
Can I please have tea, sympathy, silly jokes and antidotes to make me smile pretty please.
Hugs and Knitter kisses  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have really find memories of coming down with an awful cold.
My bet friend hauled me off to the pub, despite my protests and got me very d*unk on hot toddies, giving detailed instructions on how to make them to the poor barman.
It was a great night, and I woke up with a bit of a hangover and no cold.
OP, if you have a cold, I'd do the same for you.
Otherwise tea it is.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have the flu and in bed 2 nd day and not long been back from holiday .. hot and cold my heads hurting but fab stops me from feeling sorry as I love the forums and they make me smile .. Tea and cake would be nice .  Hope you feel better soon. xxx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I have really find memories of coming down with an awful cold.
My bet friend hauled me off to the pub, despite my protests and got me very d*unk on hot toddies, giving detailed instructions on how to make them to the poor barman.
It was a great night, and I woke up with a bit of a hangover and no cold.
OP, if you have a cold, I'd do the same for you.
Otherwise tea it is.
"
Crazyhotwife I'm in |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ames6ft5Man
over a year ago
North London / Herts |
Given OP is poorly -
A man walks into the pharmacy and asks the pharmacist, ”Do you have any acetylsalicylic acid?”
“Do you mean aspirin?” says the pharmacist.
“That’s it, I can never remember that word.”
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I stole this from another forumite...
There's this mummy balloon, this daddy balloon and this baby balloon, but the baby balloon always gets scared at night and creeps into his mum & dad's room.
So, the daddy balloon's putting the baby balloon to bed one night and makes him promise not to get up again... but of course the baby gets scared and creeps into his parents' room, and wiggles in between them, but he didn't have much room. So, he lets a bit of air out of his dad... still didn't have enough room. He lets a bit of air out of his mum... still didn't have enough room. So he lets a bit of air out of himself so he's finally comfortable enough to fall asleep.
So, his dad wakes up in the morning, and he's furious at his son's behaviour, and he says to his son... "You've not only let me & your mother down, but you've let yourself down too!" |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I have the flu and in bed 2 nd day and not long been back from holiday .. hot and cold my heads hurting but fab stops me from feeling sorry as I love the forums and they make me smile .. Tea and cake would be nice . Hope you feel better soon. xxx"
Oh dear you too lovely mwah. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So I'm poorly and this is my second day sofa bound.
Can I please have tea, sympathy, silly jokes and antidotes to make me smile pretty please.
Hugs and Knitter kisses "
Aww get well soon pretty lady xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Given OP is poorly -
A man walks into the pharmacy and asks the pharmacist, ”Do you have any acetylsalicylic acid?”
“Do you mean aspirin?” says the pharmacist.
“That’s it, I can never remember that word.”
"
It's a good job your tall |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ames6ft5Man
over a year ago
North London / Herts |
Knitter walks into the doctors and says "Doctor I'm not well".
"You seem to have a bad cough Knitter", says the Doctor.
"Bad you say? That's a shame I've been practising all night." says Knitter.
I'll get my (white) coat. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I stole this from another forumite...
There's this mummy balloon, this daddy balloon and this baby balloon, but the baby balloon always gets scared at night and creeps into his mum & dad's room.
So, the daddy balloon's putting the baby balloon to bed one night and makes him promise not to get up again... but of course the baby gets scared and creeps into his parents' room, and wiggles in between them, but he didn't have much room. So, he lets a bit of air out of his dad... still didn't have enough room. He lets a bit of air out of his mum... still didn't have enough room. So he lets a bit of air out of himself so he's finally comfortable enough to fall asleep.
So, his dad wakes up in the morning, and he's furious at his son's behaviour, and he says to his son... "You've not only let me & your mother down, but you've let yourself down too!""
Haha haha I love that one |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"How about snuggling (sorry View for the S word) in your duvet on the sofa, set up a tray of snacky bits, a cuppa & pop on a girlie chick flick  "
Sounds like a plan |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I stole this from another forumite...
There's this mummy balloon, this daddy balloon and this baby balloon, but the baby balloon always gets scared at night and creeps into his mum & dad's room.
So, the daddy balloon's putting the baby balloon to bed one night and makes him promise not to get up again... but of course the baby gets scared and creeps into his parents' room, and wiggles in between them, but he didn't have much room. So, he lets a bit of air out of his dad... still didn't have enough room. He lets a bit of air out of his mum... still didn't have enough room. So he lets a bit of air out of himself so he's finally comfortable enough to fall asleep.
So, his dad wakes up in the morning, and he's furious at his son's behaviour, and he says to his son... "You've not only let me & your mother down, but you've let yourself down too!"
Haha haha I love that one "
Shit jokes always make me laugh 
(Credit to Old Toshy!) |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Knitter walks into the doctors and says "Doctor I'm not well".
"You seem to have a bad cough Knitter", says the Doctor.
"Bad you say? That's a shame I've been practising all night." says Knitter.
I'll get my (white) coat."
Yeap tall works well for Id stick with tall |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Why did the orange get stuck up the hill?
I don't know Why did the orange get stuck up the hill?
Because it ran out of juice!
(Is that tumble...)"
I liked it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ames6ft5Man
over a year ago
North London / Herts |
"Knitter walks into the doctors and says "Doctor I'm not well".
"You seem to have a bad cough Knitter", says the Doctor.
"Bad you say? That's a shame I've been practising all night." says Knitter.
I'll get my (white) coat.
Yeap tall works well for Id stick with tall "
Got it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Oh Knitter you're being well looked after so you will be better in no time.
I shall leave a bottle of chardonnay and a box of chocs for when you're feeling up to it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Another try (yes I'm still tall)
What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu?"
Okay giant let have it
What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I can do green tea and curvy cuddles under the duvet. Ooo. I might have some brandy somewhere too! I know ive Def got vodka!!
Get well soon hun. Xx"
Ohhh yes please to curvy cuddles |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Oh Knitter you're being well looked after so you will be better in no time.
I shall leave a bottle of chardonnay and a box of chocs for when you're feeling up to it. "
Thank you MrsMac |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Shall we bring you tea,cake and a blanket.
I can bring a muscled guy to do a chest rub if that would assist. Tatum Channing do?
Sarah "
Suddenly I feel ill too- can you bring him here please?  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment. 
*I have your coat.....
Perfect thank you. Wait... it has straps.... Hang on!!!!"
 okay you can stay for a bit  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I can do green tea and curvy cuddles under the duvet. Ooo. I might have some brandy somewhere too! I know ive Def got vodka!!
Get well soon hun. Xx
Ohhh yes please to curvy cuddles "
Jump on under then, there's plenty of room and it's all snuggly and warm. You ready? Xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *odareyouMan
over a year ago
not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds) |
Guy goes to the Dr s ..
Dr asks " what's seems to be the problem.?"
Guy replies " I can't stop singing the green green grass of home.!!"
Dr says "ahhh you've Tom Jones syndre"
Guy asks "is it rare??"
Dr says "its not unusual."
My last girlfriend broke up with me , she said it was because of my obsession with the monkees..I didn't belive her...and then I saw her face.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Shall we bring you tea,cake and a blanket.
I can bring a muscled guy to do a chest rub if that would assist. Tatum Channing do?
Sarah
Suddenly I feel ill too- can you bring him here please? "
You'll have to come here and play with him |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I can do green tea and curvy cuddles under the duvet. Ooo. I might have some brandy somewhere too! I know ive Def got vodka!!
Get well soon hun. Xx
Ohhh yes please to curvy cuddles
Jump on under then, there's plenty of room and it's all snuggly and warm. You ready? Xx"
Oh ready |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"A man walks into a bar CLUNK it was an iron bar boom boom.!!
Get well soon my gorgeous chum. Tea and sympathy from Wales xx"
Taff that was almost as bad as the tall guy |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I can do green tea and curvy cuddles under the duvet. Ooo. I might have some brandy somewhere too! I know ive Def got vodka!!
Get well soon hun. Xx
Ohhh yes please to curvy cuddles
Jump on under then, there's plenty of room and it's all snuggly and warm. You ready? Xx
Oh ready "
Here goes. You dont mind if I stroke your hair do you. I'm not feeling 100% either. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Guy goes to the Dr s ..
Dr asks " what's seems to be the problem.?"
Guy replies " I can't stop singing the green green grass of home.!!"
Dr says "ahhh you've Tom Jones syndre"
Guy asks "is it rare??"
Dr says "its not unusual."
My last girlfriend broke up with me , she said it was because of my obsession with the monkees..I didn't belive her...and then I saw her face.. "
Haha haha I like |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I can do green tea and curvy cuddles under the duvet. Ooo. I might have some brandy somewhere too! I know ive Def got vodka!!
Get well soon hun. Xx
Ohhh yes please to curvy cuddles
Jump on under then, there's plenty of room and it's all snuggly and warm. You ready? Xx
Oh ready
Here goes. You dont mind if I stroke your hair do you. I'm not feeling 100% either. "
Stroke away |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have really find memories of coming down with an awful cold.
My bet friend hauled me off to the pub, despite my protests and got me very d*unk on hot toddies, giving detailed instructions on how to make them to the poor barman.
It was a great night, and I woke up with a bit of a hangover and no cold.
OP, if you have a cold, I'd do the same for you.
Otherwise tea it is.
Crazyhotwife I'm in"
I'm there. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I can do green tea and curvy cuddles under the duvet. Ooo. I might have some brandy somewhere too! I know ive Def got vodka!!
Get well soon hun. Xx
Ohhh yes please to curvy cuddles
Jump on under then, there's plenty of room and it's all snuggly and warm. You ready? Xx
Oh ready
Here goes. You dont mind if I stroke your hair do you. I'm not feeling 100% either.
Stroke away "
Thank you. Mmmm. Such soft.....
..... Hair. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"So I'm poorly and this is my second day sofa bound.
"
Pffh
That's not poorly, this is the first day since last Wednesday my brain has been back on planet earth, and even now it seems to be floating an inch off the ground (cross-eyed smiley)
So I'm off to curl up into a ball, suck my thumb, and find a BOOBIES thread.
You can't look at boobs and not smile: fact)
Mr ddc |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So I'm poorly and this is my second day sofa bound.
Can I please have tea, sympathy, silly jokes and antidotes to make me smile pretty please.
Hugs and Knitter kisses "
Should you require a foot, or any other part of the body, rub I'm here for you.
Also available for bed baths. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"So I'm poorly and this is my second day sofa bound.
Pffh
That's not poorly, this is the first day since last Wednesday my brain has been back on planet earth, and even now it seems to be floating an inch off the ground (cross-eyed smiley)
So I'm off to curl up into a ball, suck my thumb, and find a BOOBIES thread.
You can't look at boobs and not smile: fact)
Mr ddc"
Feel better enjoy the boobs |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"So I'm poorly and this is my second day sofa bound.
Can I please have tea, sympathy, silly jokes and antidotes to make me smile pretty please.
Hugs and Knitter kisses
Should you require a foot, or any other part of the body, rub I'm here for you.
Also available for bed baths."
Foot rub yummy |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
Mr ddc
Feel better enjoy the boobs "
Ty
(Although, as a relative newcomer to those threads, I was a little taken aback by the number of male appendages appearing. There need to be some better 'trades-description' mods.
It was all: ahhh, they're nice..., mmm, they're nice....followed by 'whoa! What are you doing with THAT )
Still, every day's a school day
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
Mr ddc
Feel better enjoy the boobs
Ty
(Although, as a relative newcomer to those threads, I was a little taken aback by the number of male appendages appearing. There need to be some better 'trades-description' mods.
It was all: ahhh, they're nice..., mmm, they're nice....followed by 'whoa! What are you doing with THAT )
Still, every day's a school day
"
Yes those male appendages have a way of popping up |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Hands you cupa and a choccy biccy
what does a penquin wear at the beach?
Flipper flops
what do you call a Frenchman in sandals?
Phileep flop "
Jokes lol. Tea and biccy mwah mwah |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Or one with a spade?
DOUG!
Oh dear longer go join the tall guy "
I have a long one(fnar)about a mummy whale, a daddy whale, and a baby whale?
Can't remember how the punch line goes though.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Or one with a spade?
DOUG!
Oh dear longer go join the tall guy
I have a long one(fnar)about a mummy whale, a daddy whale, and a baby whale?
Can't remember how the punch line goes though.."
Take a seat hun it will come to you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Polar bear walks into a bar.
say's to the barman a large rum and ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- please, Barman replies yes but why the large pause?
Polar bear replies I was born with them |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Polar bear walks into a bar.
say's to the barman a large rum and ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- please, Barman replies yes but why the large pause?
Polar bear replies I was born with them "
Giggles |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *odareyouMan
over a year ago
not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds) |
Policeman knocks at a door... Lady answers and asks "yes..can I help you ?"
"Mrs Smith ?" Asks the policeman.. "yes" replies the lady.. Policeman shows her a picture and asks "is this your husband?"...
"Yes" replies Mrs Smith "why do you ask ?" .... "It looks as if he's been hit by a bus" replies the policeman...
"I know " she says "he's got a great personality though!!" |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Polar bear walks into a bar.
say's to the barman a large rum and ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- please, Barman replies yes but why the large pause?
Polar bear replies I was born with them "
I've never ordered rum in my life!!!
Get well soon Knitter, you need to be well for what I have in mind for you |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Policeman knocks at a door... Lady answers and asks "yes..can I help you ?"
"Mrs Smith ?" Asks the policeman.. "yes" replies the lady.. Policeman shows her a picture and asks "is this your husband?"...
"Yes" replies Mrs Smith "why do you ask ?" .... "It looks as if he's been hit by a bus" replies the policeman...
"I know " she says "he's got a great personality though!!""
This made me laugh |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Paleontologists have discovered a dinosaur, female with an exceedingly large tounge...a Licksalotofpuss it is believed
Hugs x"
The jokes Meh lover the hugs |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
