'Colour me happy and count me in!' I forget where I heard this first, and no it wasn't Steel Magnolias, before anyone volunteers it, I was saying it well before that!

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By *alandNitaCouple over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"What's yours "

We know a song about that......

Cal

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Many a mickle makes a muckle

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By *iamondjoeMan over a year ago

Glastonbury

Hell's bells and buckets of blood!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well it's enough to make you want to throw ya bollocks at the clock

Don't piss up my leg and tell me it's raining

Why don't you go and take your head for a shit

I'm so happy I could shit a rainbow

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy

Ok pal, no problem, don't go and get stabbed will ya

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By *iamondjoeMan over a year ago

Glastonbury

As my granny used to say:

"It's colder than a witch's tit!"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"As my granny used to say:

"It's colder than a witch's tit!""

Mine used to say - She's all fur coat no knickers.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"As my granny used to say:

"It's colder than a witch's tit!"

Mine used to say - She's all fur coat no knickers. "

Mine used to say "back in the cupboard until you've d*unk your cod liver oil"

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By *iamondjoeMan over a year ago

Glastonbury

"As my granny used to say:

"It's colder than a witch's tit!"

Mine used to say - She's all fur coat no knickers.

Mine used to say "back in the cupboard until you've d*unk your cod liver oil" "

And she used to say:

"Black a Newgate knocker."

Whatever that means?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not in this lifetime.

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By *illwill69uMan over a year ago

moston

I have two:

'Small things amuse small minds, (the first part everyone knows and quotes) while smaller minds look on' (the second part that seems to upset those who quote the first part).

The second is:

'Though the mills of God grind slowly; Yet they grind exceeding small;

Though with patience He stands waiting, With exactness grinds He all.'

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Don't over egg the pudding!

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By *ensual temptressWoman over a year ago

Southampton

Arguing with an idiot is like playing chess with a pigeon . No matter how well you play, the pigeon is just going to shit on the board and still strut about like they won .

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By *iamondjoeMan over a year ago

Glastonbury

NO!

*rolls eyes*

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You can't polish a turd but you can sprinkle it with glitter!

You really make my shit itch!

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By *iamondjoeMan over a year ago

Glastonbury

"You can't polish a turd but you can sprinkle it with glitter!"

Can I get you bullshit with extra sprinkles, sir?

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By *B9 QueenWoman over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

I hate 'at the end of the day '. I use it all the time .

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By *B9 QueenWoman over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

"To err is human.. My epitaph.

To err is human. To errrrrr is a typo .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Whatever doesn't kill me...

Had better start running...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Whatever doesn't kill me...

Had better start running..."

Lmfao

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You can't polish a turd but you can sprinkle it with glitter!

Can I get you bullshit with extra sprinkles, sir?

Loolool

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By *iamondjoeMan over a year ago

Glastonbury

"To err is human.. My epitaph.

I always fancied:

"Died on the deck of a burning battleship saving his children."

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By *iamondjoeMan over a year ago

Glastonbury

I do over-use this in conversation

"You have *no* idea!"

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By *anejohnkent6263Couple over a year ago

canterbury

cant polish a turd....but you can roll it in glitter

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By *risky_MareWoman over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Well it's enough to make you want to throw ya bollocks at the clock

Hahaha, I love that one!!

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By *risky_MareWoman over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

Sod this for a game of soldiers!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fuck a Duck

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can always tell when your talking bullshit, your lips move!!

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By *iamondjoeMan over a year ago

Glastonbury

Rules are for the guidance of the wise and the blind obeyance of fools

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My own personal favourite is 'for the love of Johnny depp' when I'm at work and I can't swear at the mother fuckers who dither at the counter either with money or ordering, I don't say it when they are there obviously I'm not that much of a cah!!!

G x

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By *iamondjoeMan over a year ago

Glastonbury

"Meet me and find out"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sod this for a game of soldiers!

I say this and now I come to think - what the hell does it mean?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

At work when the boss says. "We will do that but it's not gonna happen overnight ",,which roughly translates too. You have no fucking chance tosh