FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Chivalry Isn't Dead, You're Just Dating Assholes
Chivalry Isn't Dead, You're Just Dating Assholes
Jump to: Newest in thread
| |||
 | |||
"Tell that to the woman who let a door slam in my face today "  nasty! | |||
"Tell that to the woman who let a door slam in my face today "What does that have to do with your own behaviour? | |||
 | |||
| |||
 | |||
| |||
| |||
 | |||
| |||
"Too long to read; try copying and pasting something a bit more pithy, please "With funny bits | |||
"A nice piece I discovered on the Internet... Although the title couldn’t sum it up better, it first has to be said that chivalry is not something that has died, but evolved. In the past, men felt pressure to be chivalrous - so whether they liked it or not, they did it because, well, everyone else was doing it. I suppose many women define chivalry in different ways, but for me, it means going out of your way to show a woman you want to take care of her, and impress her with your kindness and generosity. This can be done in simple ways, like offering a coat if she’s cold, opening doors, sending flowers, paying the bill. It can be done in more grand ways, like sending romantic gifts to her office, asking to dance out of the blue, surprising her with a heartfelt letter. What happened to chivalry is, the societal pressure was taken off - so men who were not naturally chivalrous (i.e. kind and generous), were now free to act however they please. This does us a huge favor. Women of the past had to practically marry a man before she saw his true colors, because there was so much pressure for him to show decorum. Now there’s no such thing, and so the men who are truly classy will stand out. If you’re in a predicament where you’ve dated man after man, and none of them have showed that they are willing to think for anyone but themselves, then you’ve just been dating the wrong men. In all likelihood, you’re a kind and generous woman who deserves a lot better, despite what you believe. It may be harder to find good men out there now, since men have so much license to be as obnoxious as they want - but all you need is one good man. Just one. You’re probably not going to find him immediately, but there are enough of them out there. You’re going to have to through a lot - this you probably already know. Don’t give up hope, though. Finding a chivalrous man is well worth it. The really terrible thing that people like to assume is that, because we enjoy chivalry, we’re not feminists. I disagree. I think that respecting ourselves enough to want a man who is going to treat us with the highest possible regard is very feminist. It shows we value ourselves and take interest in our own future, as well as the future of whatever family we wish to create. Men say to us, Why should we? Why should we be chivalrous? Those are the wrong men. They don’t get it, they’ll never get it. Ask a chivalrous man why he’s chivalrous and he’ll probably say something like, Because I love women, and I think they deserve all of the kindness a man can offer. Men who ask why they should be chivalrous should ask themselves if they truly love women, or if they are only capable of loving themselves. They’re just not emotionally mature enough to be a valid partner. All too often now, we see women who are willing to take care of a man in so many ways, but men can’t be bothered to lift a finger. Open the door? Why should I? Pay the bill? Why should I? As if we’re the ones asking them out, as if we’re vying for their attention. We’re not. A note to men: If you desire us, treat us that way. Like you desire us - not like you’ve hired us." called being an approval seeking beta male, women like a challenge and alpha males who can be gentlemen but wont bend over backwards for them. | |||
"I think manners are better than chivalry. Chivalry seems to cause an imbalance amongst genders. " I agree with this. It does cause an imbalance and seems to be what men should do for women and vice versa. Just be nice to people, hold the door for anyone because it's a polite thing to do. | |||
"called being an approval seeking beta male, women like a challenge and alpha males who can be gentlemen but wont bend over backwards for them." I'm not sure the alpha/beta model is true in real life. Maybe in pick up artist books though | |||
| |||
"I appreciate courtesy. From both sexes. Chivalry as defined by the OP (and how nice it is of him to offer us women advice) is not equality. It is sexism masquerading as manners. I'll hold a door open for anyone behind me because it is just good manners. It's got fuck all to do with their gender. The men I adore treat me as an equal and have respect for me as a person. They don't treat me with respect just because I am a woman." As the OP, I wasn't offering advice - merely posting something I came across and FYI the article was written by a woman - Jeanine Amella. | |||
"I appreciate courtesy. From both sexes. Chivalry as defined by the OP (and how nice it is of him to offer us women advice) is not equality. It is sexism masquerading as manners. I'll hold a door open for anyone behind me because it is just good manners. It's got fuck all to do with their gender. The men I adore treat me as an equal and have respect for me as a person. They don't treat me with respect just because I am a woman. As the OP, I wasn't offering advice - merely posting something I came across and FYI the article was written by a woman - Jeanine Amella. " I actually figured that out for myself since it was written from a female perspective. FYI I personally didn't agree with her take on it. From my own perspective. | |||
"Too long to read; try copying and pasting something a bit more pithy, please
With funny bits "Yes, we insist on funny bits | |||
| |||
""If you’re in a predicament where you’ve dated man after man, and none of them have showed that they are willing to think for anyone but themselves, then you’ve just been dating the wrong men." Just out of interest, at what point should some start to consider that they might be the problem and not everyone else? " Shhhhh! It's funnier if you odn't mention the elephant in the room. | |||
"I appreciate courtesy. From both sexes. Chivalry as defined by the OP (and how nice it is of him to offer us women advice) is not equality. It is sexism masquerading as manners. I'll hold a door open for anyone behind me because it is just good manners. It's got fuck all to do with their gender. The men I adore treat me as an equal and have respect for me as a person. They don't treat me with respect just because I am a woman." | |||
"I appreciate courtesy. From both sexes. Chivalry as defined by the OP (and how nice it is of him to offer us women advice) is not equality. It is sexism masquerading as manners. I'll hold a door open for anyone behind me because it is just good manners. It's got fuck all to do with their gender. The men I adore treat me as an equal and have respect for me as a person. They don't treat me with respect just because I am a woman. As the OP, I wasn't offering advice - merely posting something I came across and FYI the article was written by a woman - Jeanine Amella. " You "came" across that ? | |||
""If you’re in a predicament where you’ve dated man after man, and none of them have showed that they are willing to think for anyone but themselves, then you’ve just been dating the wrong men." Just out of interest, at what point should some start to consider that they might be the problem and not everyone else? Shhhhh! It's funnier if you odn't mention the elephant in the room. " It just find it amusing when you meet people on their 4th or 5th marriage and they are absolutely convinced they "pick assholes". By that stage it's usually a bit late in life to introduce them to the scientific principles of testing via the independant variable. | |||
"I appreciate courtesy. From both sexes. Chivalry as defined by the OP (and how nice it is of him to offer us women advice) is not equality. It is sexism masquerading as manners. I'll hold a door open for anyone behind me because it is just good manners. It's got fuck all to do with their gender. The men I adore treat me as an equal and have respect for me as a person. They don't treat me with respect just because I am a woman." | |||
| |||
| |||
"It's just a terrible, nonsense clickbait article." I'm more of a ClickHole fan.  | |||
"It's just a terrible, nonsense clickbait article." Nonsense with mysogynistic overtones. Its drivel. | |||
| |||
| |||
"Remeber folks if you put enough "Nice guy" tokens into a woman eventually she pays out just like a fuitmachine. On a related note though no woman has ever offered me a coat when im cold " I have just been told off for this as my lady friend playign with fire pointed out shes offered me her coat a few times lol ^_^ | |||
| |||
"Chivalry was the rules and etiquette of hand to hand combat. Our duelling days are over hence its dead" There wouldn't be half as much road rage if we bought it back. Swings and roundabouts... | |||
"I appreciate courtesy. From both sexes. Chivalry as defined by the OP (and how nice it is of him to offer us women advice) is not equality. It is sexism masquerading as manners. I'll hold a door open for anyone behind me because it is just good manners. It's got fuck all to do with their gender. The men I adore treat me as an equal and have respect for me as a person. They don't treat me with respect just because I am a woman." Wouldn't you prefer to be treated fair rather than on equal basis? I personally believe that the theory of equality is flawed. We are not all born equal, therefore we should not all be treated as equals. | |||
"Chivalry was the rules and etiquette of hand to hand combat. Our duelling days are over hence its dead There wouldn't be half as much road rage if we bought it back. Swings and roundabouts... " Probably not. Just annoys me that people use chivalry to mean how blokes treat women when there was barely one mention of women in the original code | |||
| |||
| |||
""If you’re in a predicament where you’ve dated man after man, and none of them have showed that they are willing to think for anyone but themselves, then you’ve just been dating the wrong men." Just out of interest, at what point should some start to consider that they might be the problem and not everyone else? Shhhhh! It's funnier if you odn't mention the elephant in the room. It just find it amusing when you meet people on their 4th or 5th marriage and they are absolutely convinced they "pick assholes". By that stage it's usually a bit late in life to introduce them to the scientific principles of testing via the independant variable. " Lol!! | |||
 | |||
"I appreciate courtesy. From both sexes. Chivalry as defined by the OP (and how nice it is of him to offer us women advice) is not equality. It is sexism masquerading as manners. I'll hold a door open for anyone behind me because it is just good manners. It's got fuck all to do with their gender. The men I adore treat me as an equal and have respect for me as a person. They don't treat me with respect just because I am a woman." Spot on for me | |||
"I appreciate courtesy. From both sexes. Chivalry as defined by the OP (and how nice it is of him to offer us women advice) is not equality. It is sexism masquerading as manners. I'll hold a door open for anyone behind me because it is just good manners. It's got fuck all to do with their gender. The men I adore treat me as an equal and have respect for me as a person. They don't treat me with respect just because I am a woman. Spot on for me " | |||
"Chivalry, or the chivalric code, is a code of conduct associated with the medieval institution of knighthood which developed between 1170 and 1220. The code of chivalry that developed in medieval Europe had its roots in earlier centuries. It arose in the Holy Roman Empire from the idealisation of the cavalryman—involving military bravery, individual training, and service to others—especially in Francia, among horse soldiers in Charlemagne's cavalry.[1][2] The term chivalry derives from the Old French term chevalerie, which can be translated to "horse soldiery".[Note 1] Gautier states that knighthood emerged from the Moors as well as the Teutonic forests and was nurtured into civilization and chivalry by the Catholic Church.[4] Over time, its meaning in Europe has been refined to emphasise social and moral virtues more generally influenced by Arabic concept of chivalry? and the Code of Chivalry, as it stood by the Late Middle Ages, was a moral system which combined a warrior ethos, knightly piety, and courtly manners, all conspiring to establish a notion of honour and nobility." It's looks less obvious that you copied and pasted from Wikipedia if you delete the footnote references like [4] | |||
" It's looks less obvious that you copied and pasted from Wikipedia if you delete the footnote references like [4]" | |||
