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Billy no mates here
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Why are people on your friends list? Surely these are people you know/have met/at least have chatted to?"
When I said my friends list is collecting dust, I meant its empty |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why are people on your friends list? Surely these are people you know/have met/at least have chatted to?
When I said my friends list is collecting dust, I meant its empty"
So what have you been doing for 9 months.....? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Why are people on your friends list? Surely these are people you know/have met/at least have chatted to?
When I said my friends list is collecting dust, I meant its empty
So what have you been doing for 9 months.....?"
Trying to get my foot into the door and join the party but just ignored like I'm invisible |
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"Why are people on your friends list? Surely these are people you know/have met/at least have chatted to?
When I said my friends list is collecting dust, I meant its empty
So what have you been doing for 9 months.....?
Trying to get my foot into the door and join the party but just ignored like I'm invisible"
Not sure exactly what you want but there are plenty of clubs and socials all around ... do you want a personal invite? Actually, there are even those around ... it's not that difficult. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why are people on your friends list? Surely these are people you know/have met/at least have chatted to?
When I said my friends list is collecting dust, I meant its empty
So what have you been doing for 9 months.....?
Trying to get my foot into the door and join the party but just ignored like I'm invisible"
I did read on another thread about some club in Eccles ... You should try putting your foot in that door  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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As much I would love to meet new people which I do very badly but in case you don't know, I have what is known as Asperger's Syndrome which makes it completely difficult to socialize due to my neurological condition.
Don't even think of saying that I'm using this as an excuse as I'm not. You do not understand what its like to live with this. If I didn't have Asperger's, I would be out there without a problem but I have so socializing is out the window.
Don't judge me |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Why are people on your friends list? Surely these are people you know/have met/at least have chatted to?
When I said my friends list is collecting dust, I meant its empty
So what have you been doing for 9 months.....?
Trying to get my foot into the door and join the party but just ignored like I'm invisible
Not sure exactly what you want but there are plenty of clubs and socials all around ... do you want a personal invite? Actually, there are even those around ... it's not that difficult."
When I said that, it was a metaphor for saying I've tried saying hello to people on here but getting a reply back. That's why I said I was invisible. |
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By *anSusieCouple
over a year ago
Midlothian |
There really is NO excuse at all for any man/woman/couple to have ZERO contact after 9 months. It tells me said person/s are putting in no effort at all.
VERY simple answer, which has been posted countless time is.........get yourself to a social in your area!! problem solved in a single very easy step, it's how we started out so no reason why it shouldn't work for you to (Dan) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As much I would love to meet new people which I do very badly but in case you don't know, I have what is known as Asperger's Syndrome which makes it completely difficult to socialize due to my neurological condition.
Don't even think of saying that I'm using this as an excuse as I'm not. You do not understand what its like to live with this. If I didn't have Asperger's, I would be out there without a problem but I have so socializing is out the window.
Don't judge me"
No one is judging you, you put this post up and the responses are appropriate to that post. There are several people on here with various difficulties and thise with experience and who meet people with such. So actually people do understand, and I get it makes it more difficult. However the advice still stands that people do offer one to one coffee socials etc, if you don't like group situations (and many dont) look for these to meet people, even for a coffee and chat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Why are people on your friends list? Surely these are people you know/have met/at least have chatted to?
When I said my friends list is collecting dust, I meant its empty
So what have you been doing for 9 months.....?
Trying to get my foot into the door and join the party but just ignored like I'm invisible"
Did someone say something?
Do what others have suggested socials/clubs your a little fish in a sea of sharks |
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No one is judging you.. but passing comments.
Its easy to use disabilities or personal traits that puts one into a minority as a weapon.
I am in a minority and equally less appealing to women due to race.. but I accept that and have no issue with it. Becoming argumentative about it wont change or help things. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"As much I would love to meet new people which I do very badly but in case you don't know, I have what is known as Asperger's Syndrome which makes it completely difficult to socialize due to my neurological condition.
Don't even think of saying that I'm using this as an excuse as I'm not. You do not understand what its like to live with this. If I didn't have Asperger's, I would be out there without a problem but I have so socializing is out the window.
Don't judge me"
Ok, you can't get out and socialise, so how do you expect to meet people? What are you wanting from this thread? How did you think you were going to meet people if you can't get out and socialise? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I understand exactly what it is like to live with Aspies....still got friends. I'm just the odd one that most people have to explain about to their other friends before I meet them lol. I found it easier when I first started out going to clubs with someone I knew beforehand and had been speaking to on here first and who knew how to recognise when it was getting too much and I tend to go during the day time or early on in the evening when the clubs are quietest. Far less intimidating then  you've achieved the first step; diagnosis. Now you have to develop your coping and behavioral strategies. You'll get there but it will be hard. Get the first visit and play over and done with and there will be no stopping you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"As much I would love to meet new people which I do very badly but in case you don't know, I have what is known as Asperger's Syndrome which makes it completely difficult to socialize due to my neurological condition.
Don't even think of saying that I'm using this as an excuse as I'm not. You do not understand what its like to live with this. If I didn't have Asperger's, I would be out there without a problem but I have so socializing is out the window.
Don't judge me"
I understand what it's like to live with as my son has it.. But you must realise that people will judge you and more so if you post threads saying you have no mates..
There is nothing to stop you getting yourself along to an organised social and then all you need to do is explain your condition ... People will understand |
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Op i dont have aspergers but i have bipolar, now for different reasons to you i couldnt actually go anywhere on my own up to a couple of years ago. I made some great friends on here and because of them i used to get to socials you would not believe the lengths we had to go to but noone on the outside would ever guess. My mental health has improved so much but i still have to put things in place.
If i lived near you op id take you out and help you to get to meet people.
If you look on the forums we seem to have started a new coffee meet craze. Where people are happy to meet up with newbies or unverified people.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there."
Aspergers affects people differently.. My son will talk at anyone, regardless of whether they want to be spoken to or not!! It makes me smile as his friends just walk away if they don't want listen so he goes off looking for another 'victim' to talk at  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there.
Aspergers affects people differently.. My son will talk at anyone, regardless of whether they want to be spoken to or not!! It makes me smile as his friends just walk away if they don't want listen so he goes off looking for another 'victim' to talk at "
My nephew can be like this, especially if it's to do with computers and games, he can talk for hours and hours about that |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"There's no need to appologise for any condition that may affect your life. I suffer with psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis, but I never let it get me down "
Most of the time, I'm alright and get on with life and not let my condition get me down but there are moments which I'm sure doesn't happen often where I would feel down in the dumps with myself which does take a bit of a while for me to get out of it |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there.
Aspergers affects people differently.. My son will talk at anyone, regardless of whether they want to be spoken to or not!! It makes me smile as his friends just walk away if they don't want listen so he goes off looking for another 'victim' to talk at
My nephew can be like this, especially if it's to do with computers and games, he can talk for hours and hours about that "
I'm sort of the same when it comes TV programmes, movies and games. I would even recite lines from a programme or movie I like as well |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there.
Aspergers affects people differently.. My son will talk at anyone, regardless of whether they want to be spoken to or not!! It makes me smile as his friends just walk away if they don't want listen so he goes off looking for another 'victim' to talk at
My nephew can be like this, especially if it's to do with computers and games, he can talk for hours and hours about that
I'm sort of the same when it comes TV programmes, movies and games. I would even recite lines from a programme or movie I like as well"
That's a great trait, I forget most things to do with movies and programmes until someone mentions them and then I remember |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there."
I understand a little re the social awkwardness but can't really offer you any practical advice.
You seem to be interacting with people on here now so I hope that helps you.
x |
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"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there.
Aspergers affects people differently.. My son will talk at anyone, regardless of whether they want to be spoken to or not!! It makes me smile as his friends just walk away if they don't want listen so he goes off looking for another 'victim' to talk at
My nephew can be like this, especially if it's to do with computers and games, he can talk for hours and hours about that
I'm sort of the same when it comes TV programmes, movies and games. I would even recite lines from a programme or movie I like as well"
have you thought about going to some sort of convention to help with your socializing, sounds like you would be right at home at sone geek movie convention |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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He says he struggled with socialising due to aspergers and social anxiety, and people's advice is to just socialise? How is that any different from telling a depressed person to just be happy? |
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"He says he struggled with socialising due to aspergers and social anxiety, and people's advice is to just socialise? How is that any different from telling a depressed person to just be happy?"
there helping him with ways to socialize whats the alternative tell him to stay at home and not go out
|
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"He says he struggled with socialising due to aspergers and social anxiety, and people's advice is to just socialise? How is that any different from telling a depressed person to just be happy?"
so whats your advice for him then?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He says he struggled with socialising due to aspergers and social anxiety, and people's advice is to just socialise? How is that any different from telling a depressed person to just be happy?"
However, the OP only explained that half way though the post so the advice at the beginning was.correct, after that, those with experience are trying to help with ways to enable a comfortable and enjoyable way to meet people |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He says he struggled with socialising due to aspergers and social anxiety, and people's advice is to just socialise? How is that any different from telling a depressed person to just be happy?there helping him with ways to socialize whats the alternative tell him to stay at home and not go out"
I wasn't talking about you, just some of the earlier comments were kinda insensitive
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"He says he struggled with socialising due to aspergers and social anxiety, and people's advice is to just socialise? How is that any different from telling a depressed person to just be happy?there helping him with ways to socialize whats the alternative tell him to stay at home and not go out I wasn't talking about you, just some of the earlier comments were kinda insensitive "
so what would you advice him to do
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there.
Aspergers affects people differently.. My son will talk at anyone, regardless of whether they want to be spoken to or not!! It makes me smile as his friends just walk away if they don't want listen so he goes off looking for another 'victim' to talk at
My nephew can be like this, especially if it's to do with computers and games, he can talk for hours and hours about that
I'm sort of the same when it comes TV programmes, movies and games. I would even recite lines from a programme or movie I like as well
That's a great trait, I forget most things to do with movies and programmes until someone mentions them and then I remember"
I don't know why I remember lines from programmes or films. I must have a good memory.
I had a look on google to see if this is connected to Asperger's and found that it is something called Echolalia or Scripting. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"As much I would love to meet new people which I do very badly but in case you don't know, I have what is known as Asperger's Syndrome which makes it completely difficult to socialize due to my neurological condition.
Don't even think of saying that I'm using this as an excuse as I'm not. You do not understand what its like to live with this. If I didn't have Asperger's, I would be out there without a problem but I have so socializing is out the window.
Don't judge me"
Son has this, attached to odd and adhd. Feel your pain friend. But keep pushing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there.
Aspergers affects people differently.. My son will talk at anyone, regardless of whether they want to be spoken to or not!! It makes me smile as his friends just walk away if they don't want listen so he goes off looking for another 'victim' to talk at
My nephew can be like this, especially if it's to do with computers and games, he can talk for hours and hours about that
I'm sort of the same when it comes TV programmes, movies and games. I would even recite lines from a programme or movie I like as well
That's a great trait, I forget most things to do with movies and programmes until someone mentions them and then I remember
I don't know why I remember lines from programmes or films. I must have a good memory.
I had a look on google to see if this is connected to Asperger's and found that it is something called Echolalia or Scripting."
I shall have to Google those, thanks for that info, that's really helpful |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"He says he struggled with socialising due to aspergers and social anxiety, and people's advice is to just socialise? How is that any different from telling a depressed person to just be happy?there helping him with ways to socialize whats the alternative tell him to stay at home and not go out I wasn't talking about you, just some of the earlier comments were kinda insensitive so what would you advice him to do"
I'm in a similar kinda situation, I'd never go to a club or anything like that cos of my social anxiety. The few meets I've had I've talked to them loads before online, and they've understood my situation
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there.
Aspergers affects people differently.. My son will talk at anyone, regardless of whether they want to be spoken to or not!! It makes me smile as his friends just walk away if they don't want listen so he goes off looking for another 'victim' to talk at
My nephew can be like this, especially if it's to do with computers and games, he can talk for hours and hours about that
I'm sort of the same when it comes TV programmes, movies and games. I would even recite lines from a programme or movie I like as well
That's a great trait, I forget most things to do with movies and programmes until someone mentions them and then I remember
I don't know why I remember lines from programmes or films. I must have a good memory.
I had a look on google to see if this is connected to Asperger's and found that it is something called Echolalia or Scripting.
I shall have to Google those, thanks for that info, that's really helpful "
You're welcome. I was amazed myself when I looked it up and I never knew about it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there.
Aspergers affects people differently.. My son will talk at anyone, regardless of whether they want to be spoken to or not!! It makes me smile as his friends just walk away if they don't want listen so he goes off looking for another 'victim' to talk at
My nephew can be like this, especially if it's to do with computers and games, he can talk for hours and hours about that
I'm sort of the same when it comes TV programmes, movies and games. I would even recite lines from a programme or movie I like as well
That's a great trait, I forget most things to do with movies and programmes until someone mentions them and then I remember
I don't know why I remember lines from programmes or films. I must have a good memory.
I had a look on google to see if this is connected to Asperger's and found that it is something called Echolalia or Scripting.
I shall have to Google those, thanks for that info, that's really helpful
You're welcome. I was amazed myself when I looked it up and I never knew about it."
 tomorrow I will do so. And please do come back to these forums after tonight, you'll be welcomed in sure be good to see another face around here |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"He says he struggled with socialising due to aspergers and social anxiety, and people's advice is to just socialise? How is that any different from telling a depressed person to just be happy?there helping him with ways to socialize whats the alternative tell him to stay at home and not go out I wasn't talking about you, just some of the earlier comments were kinda insensitive so what would you advice him to do I'm in a similar kinda situation, I'd never go to a club or anything like that cos of my social anxiety. The few meets I've had I've talked to them loads before online, and they've understood my situation "
I get what you mean. The only meets I had were a couple of ago and I talked to them online. Sadly they're not on here anymore. Ever since then, I've had no luck in making new friends. I left sometime last year and then came back. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there.
Aspergers affects people differently.. My son will talk at anyone, regardless of whether they want to be spoken to or not!! It makes me smile as his friends just walk away if they don't want listen so he goes off looking for another 'victim' to talk at
My nephew can be like this, especially if it's to do with computers and games, he can talk for hours and hours about that
I'm sort of the same when it comes TV programmes, movies and games. I would even recite lines from a programme or movie I like as well
That's a great trait, I forget most things to do with movies and programmes until someone mentions them and then I remember
I don't know why I remember lines from programmes or films. I must have a good memory.
I had a look on google to see if this is connected to Asperger's and found that it is something called Echolalia or Scripting.
I shall have to Google those, thanks for that info, that's really helpful
You're welcome. I was amazed myself when I looked it up and I never knew about it.
tomorrow I will do so. And please do come back to these forums after tonight, you'll be welcomed in sure be good to see another face around here "
Aww thank you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would like to say thanks to those who understand my condition and I do appreciate the advice everyone is giving me.
As long as I can remember, I always felt like if I was to just say hello to a random person, I would feel like I'm invading their space so I usually ended up staying away. I think this has led to some form of social anxiety which I have been trying to snap out of but with me having Asperger's, its extremely difficult.
I do apologize if I was a bit offhanded as when I get in a state of stress when it comes to socializing and wanting to meet new people, I get a bit upset and end up blaming my condition and it starts spiralling downward from there.
Aspergers affects people differently.. My son will talk at anyone, regardless of whether they want to be spoken to or not!! It makes me smile as his friends just walk away if they don't want listen so he goes off looking for another 'victim' to talk at
My nephew can be like this, especially if it's to do with computers and games, he can talk for hours and hours about that
I'm sort of the same when it comes TV programmes, movies and games. I would even recite lines from a programme or movie I like as well
That's a great trait, I forget most things to do with movies and programmes until someone mentions them and then I remember
I don't know why I remember lines from programmes or films. I must have a good memory.
I had a look on google to see if this is connected to Asperger's and found that it is something called Echolalia or Scripting.
I shall have to Google those, thanks for that info, that's really helpful
You're welcome. I was amazed myself when I looked it up and I never knew about it.
tomorrow I will do so. And please do come back to these forums after tonight, you'll be welcomed in sure be good to see another face around here
Aww thank you "
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