FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Just what would be the perfect first message?
Just what would be the perfect first message?
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Lots of moaning goes on around here regarding men sending silly first messages or messages that show they haven't read the profile. Fair point of course but I thought we could try and get a bit constructive about the problem. We hear a lot about what pisses you ladies and couples off. How about you tell us what you like to see.
So ladies and couples, just what is a perfect first message for you? What will catch your eye? What is it that will elevate a message above the others? I understand everyone is looking for different things of course, but what needs to be in a first message to stop you clicking straight on the delete button? Please tell, you never know this may even make some men stop and think before sending crap messages (ok, maybe not). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To be honest I hardly ever send messages, But when I do its usually forum related and I just go from there, You/I can normally tell by their reply, If I get one, If its going to go anywhere |
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"There is no perfect first message. It either hits the spot or it doesn't.
Cut and paste jobs are a no no though"
Very true. The ladies are always quick to say what they hate. Would just like to know more about what they like to see though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think yes all women are different and yet we are women are inherently similar also.......
As humans.....non gender specific.......we seek respect, acknowledgement and here in fab world the attention of another.
So an email that says :-
I just want to say........(about her)
And even if you read no further you need to know I think..........(about her )
Understand you get ....... Messages a day......
Your profile says........
Mine says.......
Shall we chat........
If not .....once more I want to say.......(about her)
That works for me as well as humour and MUST BE FACE PIC EACH TIME HE EMAILS X
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By *olgateMan
over a year ago
on the road to nowhere in particular |
"Well I can imagine all women want different things so I doubt there is an approach that works on every woman unless Brad Pitt is a Fabswinger?"
He was but they thought he was a fake and accused him of being a cheater  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well I can imagine all women want different things so I doubt there is an approach that works on every woman unless Brad Pitt is a Fabswinger?
He was but they thought he was a fake and accused him of being a cheater "
Which was complete bullshit as we met him .... He was just a shit shag so we didn't verify him |
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"To be honest I hardly ever send messages, But when I do its usually forum related and I just go from there, You/I can normally tell by their reply, If I get one, If its going to go anywhere"
This is basically what I do. I find this is the easiest way to get chatting to women. I never had any luck at all before the forums. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like a message that feels like it's been written to me.
If you wouldn't say it to me on the street please don't say it to me here "Fancy a fuck"
Funny, that always gets my attention 
Knitter |
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First message from the man who is now my partner ....'nice tits' ,.. must have been the mood I was in, because normally that would have got a block or a nasty retort from me. I look at the profile when I am in a good mood and get a crap message, then make a decision. In short, a perfect message depends on what mood I am in and what can tell about who has sent it front their profile, no such thing as a message in isolation, always a context |
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"Well I can imagine all women want different things so I doubt there is an approach that works on every woman.."
This.
Also depends on my mood..an intelligent and considerate message may get a reply yet another day I want a message with wit and humour.
Face pic isn't necessary though on the first few messages.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There is no perfect first message. It either hits the spot or it doesn't.
Cut and paste jobs are a no no though"
This sums it up well for me. There's no magic formula, it's a combination of message & person. |
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Dear insert name .. I've read your profile and despite that I still would really like to meet you .. I'm really interested in finding a bbw/ elegantly built ..younger/older / similar aged ..lady /slut who I /she will obey her /my every sexual whim .. We could meet for a coffee or get straight down to a good shagging .. The choice is yours ..regards ..insert name |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
A good first message for me would go a little like this...
'Hi LL, I've read your profile and I think I tick your boxes so have a look at mine and get back to me if you agree.
Face and cock pic attached'
Short and sweet is better for me initially.
I'm joking about the cock pic btw |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just for a women to say hello, how are you. Normally starts with, 'iya wanna see mi fanny' instantly get blocked and deleted. "
Not for me, I lap them up,
Literally
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Like has already been said. There is no perfect first message. BUT... a good starter is addressing both of us as we are a couple, not just sending an email assuming it will be Candy who reads it. A decent face pic attached to the email, dont refer to Candy as 'babe' or 'darling' or any other similar term. Also making it personal, however you chose to do that. Also, writing in proper English. No text speak.
Any messages like that are always likely to get a response, even if it is a polite no thank you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just for a women to say hello, how are you. Normally starts with, 'iya wanna see mi fanny' instantly get blocked and deleted.
Not for me, I lap them up,
Literally
"
Gets monotonous after a while I get at least 5 a day with the shite. |
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"A good first message for me would go a little like this...
'Hi LL, I've read your profile and I think I tick your boxes so have a look at mine and get back to me if you agree.
Face and cock pic attached'
Short and sweet is better for me initially.
I'm joking about the cock pic btw "
hiya ..I'm short and sweet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A face pic of a guy I think is attractive. That's a good start
-Courtney "
Yeah but some peps wanna remain discreet until they have chatted for a while then they send a face pic |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Lots of moaning goes on around here regarding men sending silly first messages or messages that show they haven't read the profile. Fair point of course but I thought we could try and get a bit constructive about the problem. We hear a lot about what pisses you ladies and couples off. How about you tell us what you like to see.
So ladies and couples, just what is a perfect first message for you? What will catch your eye? What is it that will elevate a message above the others? I understand everyone is looking for different things of course, but what needs to be in a first message to stop you clicking straight on the delete button? Please tell, you never know this may even make some men stop and think before sending crap messages (ok, maybe not)."
actually.... in the nicest way, i think posts like this are the problem..... because in a way you would like to give people a hope there is such a thing...
and i think the most common mistake people make, especially single men, is they are not pragmatic enough to have come to terms with the fact they are not going to appeal to everyone....
so why even try.....
spread your net so far and appeal to no one.... or go after the very few that would suit you down to a tee.....
once you discover the latter.... life becomes a much happier angst free place |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A good first message for me would go a little like this...
'Hi LL, I've read your profile and I think I tick your boxes so have a look at mine and get back to me if you agree.
Face and cock pic attached'
Short and sweet is better for me initially.
I'm joking about the cock pic btw "
Schoolgirl error .. inbox about to be blitzed! (You want the cock pics really!  ) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A face pic of a guy I think is attractive. That's a good start
-Courtney
Yeah but some peps wanna remain discreet until they have chatted for a while then they send a face pic"
Fair enough, but a good message for me would have the pic. We include our face pics when we contact people for meets. I'm only saying what I prefer. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A face pic of a guy I think is attractive. That's a good start
-Courtney
Yeah but some peps wanna remain discreet until they have chatted for a while then they send a face pic"
As long as they have a verification trail and don't live down the road am happy to send a face pic |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dear MsB,
I am a highly influential Billionaire, sans children, who is looking for an older lady like yourself for a marriage, no prenups. Unfortunately i am dying so you will have to hurry up and message me back so we can arrange everything quickly.
Yours Whoever. |
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"Dear MsB,
I am a highly influential Billionaire, sans children, who is looking for an older lady like yourself for a marriage, no prenups. Unfortunately i am dying so you will have to hurry up and message me back so we can arrange everything quickly.
Yours Whoever."
Hi  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"All you people that say you don't send a first message, do you jump straight into the second and third messages to speed things up?"
I just put "fancy a fuck?" in my status, saves a lot of messing about |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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""Nice shoes, fancy a fuck"
ALWAYS works
Ladies always appreciate a compliment on their shoes
Exactly. Bulletproof. Copy & Paste it "
I have already sent a few out just waiting for their reply
or block |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dear MsB,
I am a highly influential Billionaire, sans children, who is looking for an older lady like yourself for a marriage, no prenups. Unfortunately i am dying so you will have to hurry up and message me back so we can arrange everything quickly.
Yours Whoever.
Hi "
Lol, i'm sure you are not that guy.
i got 4 messages since i put this up and got excited. one of them is 'which holes do you take cum in sexy x' (cry) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have sent polite, friendly, funny, short, long and a combination and find all women like different and it depends on the individual"
Me too .. Different for each individual. They all fail horribly ..  |
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"Lots of moaning goes on around here regarding men sending silly first messages or messages that show they haven't read the profile. Fair point of course but I thought we could try and get a bit constructive about the problem. We hear a lot about what pisses you ladies and couples off. How about you tell us what you like to see.
So ladies and couples, just what is a perfect first message for you? What will catch your eye? What is it that will elevate a message above the others? I understand everyone is looking for different things of course, but what needs to be in a first message to stop you clicking straight on the delete button? Please tell, you never know this may even make some men stop and think before sending crap messages (ok, maybe not).
actually.... in the nicest way, i think posts like this are the problem..... because in a way you would like to give people a hope there is such a thing...
and i think the most common mistake people make, especially single men, is they are not pragmatic enough to have come to terms with the fact they are not going to appeal to everyone....
so why even try.....
spread your net so far and appeal to no one.... or go after the very few that would suit you down to a tee.....
once you discover the latter.... life becomes a much happier angst free place"
This is very true. I agree. We just keep hearing women and couples moaning about these shitty first messages they get sent. I thought it may be interesting to hear what women and couples like to see in a first message that is all. I thought it may be insightful to some.
I think one of the biggest problems on here are the guys who can't take rejection and don't understand how they might not appeal to everyone. A lot of these guys are probably lost causes and maybe not really suited to this site anyway.
However, there are also some decent guys who really don't understand where they may be going wrong. Especially newbies, who can find the whole experience very frustrating at times. |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
"A good first message for me would go a little like this...
'Hi LL, I've read your profile and I think I tick your boxes so have a look at mine and get back to me if you agree.
Face and cock pic attached'
Short and sweet is better for me initially.
I'm joking about the cock pic btw
Schoolgirl error .. inbox about to be blitzed! (You want the cock pics really! )"
Not one message. That's possibly because no guys on here can tick all of my boxes, I don't think  lol..... |
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"Well I can imagine all women want different things so I doubt there is an approach that works on every woman unless Brad Pitt is a Fabswinger?
He was but they thought he was a fake and accused him of being a cheater
Which was complete bullshit as we met him .... He was just a shit shag so we didn't verify him "
lol |
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"A good first message for me would go a little like this...
'Hi LL, I've read your profile and I think I tick your boxes so have a look at mine and get back to me if you agree.
Face and cock pic attached'
Short and sweet is better for me initially.
I'm joking about the cock pic btw
Schoolgirl error .. inbox about to be blitzed! (You want the cock pics really! )
Not one message. That's possibly because no guys on here can tick all of my boxes, I don't think lol..... "
I do but I'm playing hard to get |
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