FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Advice needed please
Advice needed please
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Hi all, I've been married for 8 years now. Our sex life was good to start off with. The last two years it's pretty much non existent.
I am 35 she is 29 we have two children.
Whenever I go near her to make love she finds an excuse as to why not to have sex!
This has been going on for a while now, the last time we had sex was 2-3 months ago now!
What I was wondering and any advice appreciated was am I doing something wrong. I can't seem to see what I have done wrong if any
She is socialising alot more with her friends which is good.
Even when you both leave for work or go out we used to give each other a peck on the lips but not anymore.
Before anyone says try talking to her, I have but it just leads to arguments which I'd rather not have.
Ladies if I'm missing something please do let me into it.
Guys if you've been there before how have you dealt with it.
Sorry for the long message and also advice on a swingers site.
Avi |
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I would ask outright, do you want to save this marriage. If you guys can't talk without arguing, then go for counselling. If its worth saving, you both need to fight for it. If not, best for everyone to move on. How is the rest of your relationship, apart from sex? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi all, I've been married for 8 years now. Our sex life was good to start off with. The last two years it's pretty much non existent.
I am 35 she is 29 we have two children.
Whenever I go near her to make love she finds an excuse as to why not to have sex!
This has been going on for a while now, the last time we had sex was 2-3 months ago now!
What I was wondering and any advice appreciated was am I doing something wrong. I can't seem to see what I have done wrong if any
She is socialising alot more with her friends which is good.
Even when you both leave for work or go out we used to give each other a peck on the lips but not anymore.
Before anyone says try talking to her, I have but it just leads to arguments which I'd rather not have.
Ladies if I'm missing something please do let me into it.
Guys if you've been there before how have you dealt with it.
Sorry for the long message and also advice on a swingers site.
Avi"
You know what folk are going to say, don't you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Maybe they're picking up signs about your commitment and feelings to them? You have after all veris from people on here? You're suggesting it's you're partner but without doubt you are half of the relationship. Give maximum effort to your side of the marriage then look at it again. At least you can say you tried if it fails. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
It's hectic to say the least, once the kids are in bed we have a little me time. In terms we watch the TV together, she waits for me to eat and vice versa, generally good conversation.
What I am thinking is am I expecting to much.
She let's me play with her boobs and bum with my hands but won't let my little man go next to her or let me touch her vagina, nipples and that's where the excuses come in.
That's where I think am I missing anything. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought "
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun. |
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"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun."
I was trying to be diplomatic but well now it's out there yep I'm with you  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun."
I've spoken to her about spicing up our sex life like exploring different avenues! I've given her hints, she doesn't seem interested.
If she is having fun elsewhere then I am honestly happy for her. I would be understanding rather then be like I can have the fun and you can't.
I see what you're saying about cheating and maybe I am being selfish! I've only met two people on her and the last meet was a long time ago. I don't need to explain the reasons why I did it (no it wasn't tit for tat). |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun."
Another thing I'm not blaming her far from it, I'm wondering I have done wrong. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun.
Another thing I'm not blaming her far from it, I'm wondering I have done wrong."
Why now, after 4+ years?
You've been cheating that long. Your sex life by your admission in the OP has only been non-existent for 2 years. What do you think you might have done wrong? Any clue at all why she might not want you touching her?
And again, do you not think you should have considered this all a bit sooner? |
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By *jj46Man
over a year ago
rhyl |
"Hi all, I've been married for 8 years now. Our sex life was good to start off with. The last two years it's pretty much non existent.
I am 35 she is 29 we have two children.
Whenever I go near her to make love she finds an excuse as to why not to have sex!
This has been going on for a while now, the last time we had sex was 2-3 months ago now!
What I was wondering and any advice appreciated was am I doing something wrong. I can't seem to see what I have done wrong if any
She is socialising alot more with her friends which is good.
Even when you both leave for work or go out we used to give each other a peck on the lips but not anymore.
Before anyone says try talking to her, I have but it just leads to arguments which I'd rather not have.
Ladies if I'm missing something please do let me into it.
Guys if you've been there before how have you dealt with it.
Sorry for the long message and also advice on a swingers site.
Avi
You know what folk are going to say, don't you?"
been down the same road but me I sensed someone else had been there it's a case of all cards on the table and talk it out or go separate ways which I chose to do .but then again I'm no jeremy kyle  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
OP if you want to improve things with your wife then the only person who can tell you how to do that is infact your wife.
Talk to her it will accomplish alot more than getting "advice" in the forums.
Whilst your post isn't about cheating on your wife once identified that will be what some (not all) will focus on.
I wish you the best of luck OP and sincerely hope you are able to work things through with your wife.
Knitter |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun.
Another thing I'm not blaming her far from it, I'm wondering I have done wrong.
Why now, after 4+ years?
You've been cheating that long. Your sex life by your admission in the OP has only been non-existent for 2 years. What do you think you might have done wrong? Any clue at all why she might not want you touching her?
And again, do you not think you should have considered this all a bit sooner?"
She's okay with me playing but not intercourse.
I can't say or remember what I might have done.
Maybe I should have considered it before, but we can't turn back time for what we have done. Thanks for the input guys and girls |
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You can only communicate more effectively with her, in order to find out.
Talk - especially when you're not eager to initiate sex, so that she's not under pressure. Express your feelings and discuss, so that she may open up. It's part of good relationship maintenance to do this anyway, at all times. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi all, I've been married for 8 years now. Our sex life was good to start off with. The last two years it's pretty much non existent.
I am 35 she is 29 we have two children.
Whenever I go near her to make love she finds an excuse as to why not to have sex!
This has been going on for a while now, the last time we had sex was 2-3 months ago now!
What I was wondering and any advice appreciated was am I doing something wrong. I can't seem to see what I have done wrong if any
She is socialising alot more with her friends which is good.
Even when you both leave for work or go out we used to give each other a peck on the lips but not anymore.
Before anyone says try talking to her, I have but it just leads to arguments which I'd rather not have.
Ladies if I'm missing something please do let me into it.
Guys if you've been there before how have you dealt with it.
Sorry for the long message and also advice on a swingers site.
Avi"
Counselling is your best bet, if all attempts at discussion lead to argument, then the presence of an impartial third party can work wonders. But it does somewhat defy belief that you can be cheating on a partner and yet wonder if you might be doing something wrong..... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Hi all, I've been married for 8 years now. Our sex life was good to start off with. The last two years it's pretty much non existent.
I am 35 she is 29 we have two children.
Whenever I go near her to make love she finds an excuse as to why not to have sex!
This has been going on for a while now, the last time we had sex was 2-3 months ago now!
What I was wondering and any advice appreciated was am I doing something wrong. I can't seem to see what I have done wrong if any
She is socialising alot more with her friends which is good.
Even when you both leave for work or go out we used to give each other a peck on the lips but not anymore.
Before anyone says try talking to her, I have but it just leads to arguments which I'd rather not have.
Ladies if I'm missing something please do let me into it.
Guys if you've been there before how have you dealt with it.
Sorry for the long message and also advice on a swingers site.
Avi
You know what folk are going to say, don't you? been down the same road but me I sensed someone else had been there it's a case of all cards on the table and talk it out or go separate ways which I chose to do .but then again I'm no jeremy kyle "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"OP if you want to improve things with your wife then the only person who can tell you how to do that is infact your wife.
Talk to her it will accomplish alot more than getting "advice" in the forums.
Whilst your post isn't about cheating on your wife once identified that will be what some (not all) will focus on.
I wish you the best of luck OP and sincerely hope you are able to work things through with your wife.
Knitter "
Thanks doll |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun.
Another thing I'm not blaming her far from it, I'm wondering I have done wrong.
Why now, after 4+ years?
You've been cheating that long. Your sex life by your admission in the OP has only been non-existent for 2 years. What do you think you might have done wrong? Any clue at all why she might not want you touching her?
And again, do you not think you should have considered this all a bit sooner?
She's okay with me playing but not intercourse.
I can't say or remember what I might have done.
Maybe I should have considered it before, but we can't turn back time for what we have done. Thanks for the input guys and girls"
My point is, as I mentioned before, she may know or suspect you were cheating. That could be what changed things.
Cheating 4+ years. No sex life for 2 years. See my point? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun.
Another thing I'm not blaming her far from it, I'm wondering I have done wrong.
Why now, after 4+ years?
You've been cheating that long. Your sex life by your admission in the OP has only been non-existent for 2 years. What do you think you might have done wrong? Any clue at all why she might not want you touching her?
And again, do you not think you should have considered this all a bit sooner?
She's okay with me playing but not intercourse.
I can't say or remember what I might have done.
Maybe I should have considered it before, but we can't turn back time for what we have done. Thanks for the input guys and girls"
It's rarely a single thing you may have said or done, it's a build-up of resentment over the years. And a lack of communication or a refusal to see things from the other side can make it very easy to deny any wrong-doing. Clearly it's unreasonable on her part to say you can't have intercourse with others yet flatly refuse to have sex with you. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Hi all, I've been married for 8 years now. Our sex life was good to start off with. The last two years it's pretty much non existent.
I am 35 she is 29 we have two children.
Whenever I go near her to make love she finds an excuse as to why not to have sex!
This has been going on for a while now, the last time we had sex was 2-3 months ago now!
What I was wondering and any advice appreciated was am I doing something wrong. I can't seem to see what I have done wrong if any
She is socialising alot more with her friends which is good.
Even when you both leave for work or go out we used to give each other a peck on the lips but not anymore.
Before anyone says try talking to her, I have but it just leads to arguments which I'd rather not have.
Ladies if I'm missing something please do let me into it.
Guys if you've been there before how have you dealt with it.
Sorry for the long message and also advice on a swingers site.
Avi
Counselling is your best bet, if all attempts at discussion lead to argument, then the presence of an impartial third party can work wonders. But it does somewhat defy belief that you can be cheating on a partner and yet wonder if you might be doing something wrong....."
I hear you but it's complicated, thanks though |
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I'm not interested in why you are here. Just don't use lack of sex as an excuse.
I was married to my husband not his cock and if there were lean times I didn't supplement elsewhere.
No one here can help you.
No one here knows you.
No one here knows your wife.
No one here know ANYTHING.
If you can't even talk without arguing it's time to call it a day.
Start separation and divorce proceedings now.
Be nice about it though. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun.
Another thing I'm not blaming her far from it, I'm wondering I have done wrong.
Why now, after 4+ years?
You've been cheating that long. Your sex life by your admission in the OP has only been non-existent for 2 years. What do you think you might have done wrong? Any clue at all why she might not want you touching her?
And again, do you not think you should have considered this all a bit sooner?
She's okay with me playing but not intercourse.
I can't say or remember what I might have done.
Maybe I should have considered it before, but we can't turn back time for what we have done. Thanks for the input guys and girls
My point is, as I mentioned before, she may know or suspect you were cheating. That could be what changed things.
Cheating 4+ years. No sex life for 2 years. See my point?"
No not sure sorry. |
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"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun.
Another thing I'm not blaming her far from it, I'm wondering I have done wrong.
Why now, after 4+ years?
You've been cheating that long. Your sex life by your admission in the OP has only been non-existent for 2 years. What do you think you might have done wrong? Any clue at all why she might not want you touching her?
And again, do you not think you should have considered this all a bit sooner?
She's okay with me playing but not intercourse.
I can't say or remember what I might have done.
Maybe I should have considered it before, but we can't turn back time for what we have done. Thanks for the input guys and girls"
Is she afraid of pregnancy, does penetration hurt her, has she guessed you have had sex elsewhere and is afraid of picking up a sti?
Who knows, only her! Talk, talk to your wife take the disrespectful comments about your sex life off your profile stop discussing her most intimate moments with strangers and as I just said elsewhere log off from fab and start talking...REALLY talking to your wife. You will never find out where you've gone wrong from people who don't know either of you.
Good luck. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun.
Another thing I'm not blaming her far from it, I'm wondering I have done wrong.
Why now, after 4+ years?
You've been cheating that long. Your sex life by your admission in the OP has only been non-existent for 2 years. What do you think you might have done wrong? Any clue at all why she might not want you touching her?
And again, do you not think you should have considered this all a bit sooner?
She's okay with me playing but not intercourse.
I can't say or remember what I might have done.
Maybe I should have considered it before, but we can't turn back time for what we have done. Thanks for the input guys and girls
My point is, as I mentioned before, she may know or suspect you were cheating. That could be what changed things.
Cheating 4+ years. No sex life for 2 years. See my point?
No not sure sorry."
Head/desk
This has to be a wind-up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The arrival of children often tips a relationship into chaos. She's tired and has small kids dragging from her, may struggle to see herself as sexually attractive because of hormonal issues or body changes, the man can fail to understand why the girl who was gagging for it before is now "too tired". Both partners become resentful and entrenched in their positions... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm not interested in why you are here. Just don't use lack of sex as an excuse.
I was married to my husband not his cock and if there were lean times I didn't supplement elsewhere.
No one here can help you.
No one here knows you.
No one here knows your wife.
No one here know ANYTHING.
If you can't even talk without arguing it's time to call it a day.
Start separation and divorce proceedings now.
Be nice about it though."
Couldn't agree more. Sorry but I'm not a one to judge but you've given me no choice here op. Maybe she's bored with it all. Perhaps it's become a habit. I say both of you need to talk to each other and not us. And go your separate ways. Gold luck |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun.
Another thing I'm not blaming her far from it, I'm wondering I have done wrong.
Why now, after 4+ years?
You've been cheating that long. Your sex life by your admission in the OP has only been non-existent for 2 years. What do you think you might have done wrong? Any clue at all why she might not want you touching her?
And again, do you not think you should have considered this all a bit sooner?
She's okay with me playing but not intercourse.
I can't say or remember what I might have done.
Maybe I should have considered it before, but we can't turn back time for what we have done. Thanks for the input guys and girls
Is she afraid of pregnancy, does penetration hurt her, has she guessed you have had sex elsewhere and is afraid of picking up a sti?
Who knows, only her! Talk, talk to your wife take the disrespectful comments about your sex life off your profile stop discussing her most intimate moments with strangers and as I just said elsewhere log off from fab and start talking...REALLY talking to your wife. You will never find out where you've gone wrong from people who don't know either of you.
Good luck."
You know what? thank you |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Your profile text does indicate a fundamental lack of respect for her, btw...."
It's interesting though.
Then he'd been married 5 years and the sex was "boring". So he'd begun cheating.
Then sex became non-existent after 6 years of marriage, after he'd been cheating for a while.
Now, after 8 years of marriage, he doesn't know what he did wrong.
Interestingly, though it's been mentioned several times, he's not addressed the possibility she knows he's been cheating.
Of course, maybe she just got bored with him going straight for her nipples/lady parts when he wanted a shag. Perhaps he's just not very good.
I still think it has to be a wind-up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
OP. Are you for real ? Do you know what its like to find your partner has cheated on you ? I do , my ex wife did the dirty on me. It is the most gut wrenching , sickly ,e empty feeling. Get off here , forget about swinging and sort your mess out. Oh and get down the clinic and get checked out. If you do manage too sort out you're marriage the last thing you want to do is give the poor girl a sti. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Wonder if he's talking to his wife or setting up a new couples profile
Hopefully he's sorting his life before it disappears infront of him "
 Somehow I doubt it. |
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"Wonder if he's talking to his wife or setting up a new couples profile
Hopefully he's sorting his life before it disappears infront of him
Somehow I doubt it."
Well he has to take any consequences that arise then doesn't he and there will be,eventually...  |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Wonder if he's talking to his wife or setting up a new couples profile
Hopefully he's sorting his life before it disappears infront of him "
I hope so but I think he may have left this one 3 or 4 years too long.
The time he needed to be sorting it was when he started looking for sex elsewhere because his sex life had become "boring".
I feel sorry for his wife, his profile showed a poor attitude towards her. |
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"Wonder if he's talking to his wife or setting up a new couples profile
Hopefully he's sorting his life before it disappears infront of him
Somehow I doubt it.
Well he has to take any consequences that arise then doesn't he and there will be,eventually... "
How true |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again."
Ain't that the truth ! |
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"Wonder if he's talking to his wife or setting up a new couples profile
Hopefully he's sorting his life before it disappears infront of him
I hope so but I think he may have left this one 3 or 4 years too long.
The time he needed to be sorting it was when he started looking for sex elsewhere because his sex life had become "boring".
I feel sorry for his wife, his profile showed a poor attitude towards her."
It's sad all round when people cheat,rightly or wrongly there's a problem somewhere along the line |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
Ain't that the truth !"
Have to look on the bright side don't you!  |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again."
But is that a reason to stay single? I've been cheated on and shit on from a great height but I don't think it's put me off meeting someone...I would like to settle down and have kids so a little piece of my heart is still open.
In regards to the OP we don't know why he was on here for 4 years I hope that he can put his demons to bed and figure something out with his wife.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
Ain't that the truth !
Have to look on the bright side don't you! "
Always !  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi all, I've been married for 8 years now. Our sex life was good to start off with. The last two years it's pretty much non existent.
I am 35 she is 29 we have two children.
Whenever I go near her to make love she finds an excuse as to why not to have sex!
This has been going on for a while now, the last time we had sex was 2-3 months ago now!
What I was wondering and any advice appreciated was am I doing something wrong. I can't seem to see what I have done wrong if any
She is socialising alot more with her friends which is good.
Even when you both leave for work or go out we used to give each other a peck on the lips but not anymore.
Before anyone says try talking to her, I have but it just leads to arguments which I'd rather not have.
Ladies if I'm missing something please do let me into it.
Guys if you've been there before how have you dealt with it.
Sorry for the long message and also advice on a swingers site.
Avi"
Wait til you've been married as long as I have you forget what sex even is lol
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
But is that a reason to stay single? I've been cheated on and shit on from a great height but I don't think it's put me off meeting someone...I would like to settle down and have kids so a little piece of my heart is still open.
In regards to the OP we don't know why he was on here for 4 years I hope that he can put his demons to bed and figure something out with his wife.."
No not at all cheeky,I'm just looking at a positive for being single. I'd love to share my life with someone |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
But is that a reason to stay single? I've been cheated on and shit on from a great height but I don't think it's put me off meeting someone...I would like to settle down and have kids so a little piece of my heart is still open.
In regards to the OP we don't know why he was on here for 4 years I hope that he can put his demons to bed and figure something out with his wife..
No not at all cheeky,I'm just looking at a positive for being single. I'd love to share my life with someone"
Ahh ok sorry misread what you meant, I understand about being single as I'm writing this in just a vest top and knickers |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again."
Again very true.
We really must stop agreeing with each other people will start talking..... I hope |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
But is that a reason to stay single? I've been cheated on and shit on from a great height but I don't think it's put me off meeting someone...I would like to settle down and have kids so a little piece of my heart is still open.
In regards to the OP we don't know why he was on here for 4 years I hope that he can put his demons to bed and figure something out with his wife..
No not at all cheeky,I'm just looking at a positive for being single. I'd love to share my life with someone
Ahh ok sorry misread what you meant, I understand about being single as I'm writing this in just a vest top and knickers "
I'm still in bed in pj's and trust me it's a good job no-one is here it's not a pretty sight . Think I'm just trying to stay positive I know where an affair ends up it destroys families,my ex's had finished by the time he was forced to tell me,but the consequences are still around to a certain degree eight years later. It just saddens me when I see people all around having affairs. Anyway moving on...That's enough of that waffle |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
Again very true.
We really must stop agreeing with each other people will start talking..... I hope "
Maybe we're just a pair of miserable so and so's |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
But is that a reason to stay single? I've been cheated on and shit on from a great height but I don't think it's put me off meeting someone...I would like to settle down and have kids so a little piece of my heart is still open.
In regards to the OP we don't know why he was on here for 4 years I hope that he can put his demons to bed and figure something out with his wife..
No not at all cheeky,I'm just looking at a positive for being single. I'd love to share my life with someone
Ahh ok sorry misread what you meant, I understand about being single as I'm writing this in just a vest top and knickers
I'm still in bed in pj's and trust me it's a good job no-one is here it's not a pretty sight . Think I'm just trying to stay positive I know where an affair ends up it destroys families,my ex's had finished by the time he was forced to tell me,but the consequences are still around to a certain degree eight years later. It just saddens me when I see people all around having affairs. Anyway moving on...That's enough of that waffle "
Ohhhh you mentioned waffles....... Breakfast in bed ? Lol |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
Again very true.
We really must stop agreeing with each other people will start talking..... I hope
Maybe we're just a pair of miserable so and so's "
I wouldn't say that old |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
But is that a reason to stay single? I've been cheated on and shit on from a great height but I don't think it's put me off meeting someone...I would like to settle down and have kids so a little piece of my heart is still open.
In regards to the OP we don't know why he was on here for 4 years I hope that he can put his demons to bed and figure something out with his wife..
No not at all cheeky,I'm just looking at a positive for being single. I'd love to share my life with someone
Ahh ok sorry misread what you meant, I understand about being single as I'm writing this in just a vest top and knickers
I'm still in bed in pj's and trust me it's a good job no-one is here it's not a pretty sight . Think I'm just trying to stay positive I know where an affair ends up it destroys families,my ex's had finished by the time he was forced to tell me,but the consequences are still around to a certain degree eight years later. It just saddens me when I see people all around having affairs. Anyway moving on...That's enough of that waffle
Ohhhh you mentioned waffles....... Breakfast in bed ? Lol "
I might still be in bed,but I had my breakfast hours ago,love waffles though |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
Again very true.
We really must stop agreeing with each other people will start talking..... I hope
Maybe we're just a pair of miserable so and so's
I wouldn't say that old "
I never said old,just miserable  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
But is that a reason to stay single? I've been cheated on and shit on from a great height but I don't think it's put me off meeting someone...I would like to settle down and have kids so a little piece of my heart is still open.
In regards to the OP we don't know why he was on here for 4 years I hope that he can put his demons to bed and figure something out with his wife..
No not at all cheeky,I'm just looking at a positive for being single. I'd love to share my life with someone
Ahh ok sorry misread what you meant, I understand about being single as I'm writing this in just a vest top and knickers
I'm still in bed in pj's and trust me it's a good job no-one is here it's not a pretty sight . Think I'm just trying to stay positive I know where an affair ends up it destroys families,my ex's had finished by the time he was forced to tell me,but the consequences are still around to a certain degree eight years later. It just saddens me when I see people all around having affairs. Anyway moving on...That's enough of that waffle
Ohhhh you mentioned waffles....... Breakfast in bed ? Lol
I might still be in bed,but I had my breakfast hours ago,love waffles though "
Ice cream and honey on mmmmmm |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
Again very true.
We really must stop agreeing with each other people will start talking..... I hope
Maybe we're just a pair of miserable so and so's
I wouldn't say that old
I never said old,just miserable "
Oh shit so you didn't doh |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
But is that a reason to stay single? I've been cheated on and shit on from a great height but I don't think it's put me off meeting someone...I would like to settle down and have kids so a little piece of my heart is still open.
In regards to the OP we don't know why he was on here for 4 years I hope that he can put his demons to bed and figure something out with his wife..
No not at all cheeky,I'm just looking at a positive for being single. I'd love to share my life with someone
Ahh ok sorry misread what you meant, I understand about being single as I'm writing this in just a vest top and knickers
I'm still in bed in pj's and trust me it's a good job no-one is here it's not a pretty sight . Think I'm just trying to stay positive I know where an affair ends up it destroys families,my ex's had finished by the time he was forced to tell me,but the consequences are still around to a certain degree eight years later. It just saddens me when I see people all around having affairs. Anyway moving on...That's enough of that waffle
Ohhhh you mentioned waffles....... Breakfast in bed ? Lol
I might still be in bed,but I had my breakfast hours ago,love waffles though
Ice cream and honey on mmmmmm"
and sprinkles,don't forget the sprinkles and little marshmallows! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
But is that a reason to stay single? I've been cheated on and shit on from a great height but I don't think it's put me off meeting someone...I would like to settle down and have kids so a little piece of my heart is still open.
In regards to the OP we don't know why he was on here for 4 years I hope that he can put his demons to bed and figure something out with his wife..
No not at all cheeky,I'm just looking at a positive for being single. I'd love to share my life with someone
Ahh ok sorry misread what you meant, I understand about being single as I'm writing this in just a vest top and knickers
I'm still in bed in pj's and trust me it's a good job no-one is here it's not a pretty sight . Think I'm just trying to stay positive I know where an affair ends up it destroys families,my ex's had finished by the time he was forced to tell me,but the consequences are still around to a certain degree eight years later. It just saddens me when I see people all around having affairs. Anyway moving on...That's enough of that waffle
Ohhhh you mentioned waffles....... Breakfast in bed ? Lol
I might still be in bed,but I had my breakfast hours ago,love waffles though
Ice cream and honey on mmmmmm
and sprinkles,don't forget the sprinkles and little marshmallows!"
Ok....... Seeing as it's you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Been a mother and working is hard keeping on top of everything can be overwhelming not taking the time to spend time on herself to feel in mood. I would get my hair done. Do my make up get a new outfit then have date night no stress just spend time together. Sometimes you don't think of yourself and it can get you down. Hope this helps I sometimes get like that good luck ?? X |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
Again very true.
We really must stop agreeing with each other people will start talking..... I hope
Maybe we're just a pair of miserable so and so's
I wouldn't say that old
I never said old,just miserable
Oh shit so you didn't doh "
You're getting old,you're seeing things that aren't there |
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"Hi all, I've been married for 8 years now. Our sex life was good to start off with. The last two years it's pretty much non existent.
I am 35 she is 29 we have two children.
Whenever I go near her to make love she finds an excuse as to why not to have sex!
This has been going on for a while now, the last time we had sex was 2-3 months ago now!
What I was wondering and any advice appreciated was am I doing something wrong. I can't seem to see what I have done wrong if any
She is socialising alot more with her friends which is good.
Even when you both leave for work or go out we used to give each other a peck on the lips but not anymore.
Before anyone says try talking to her, I have but it just leads to arguments which I'd rather not have.
Ladies if I'm missing something please do let me into it.
Guys if you've been there before how have you dealt with it.
Sorry for the long message and also advice on a swingers site.
Avi
Wait til you've been married as long as I have you forget what sex even is lol
"
I hear you..23 years and counting.. |
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"Oh unlos.....wife found him on here maybe 
Having read the thread I can't say I'm totally shocked the OP choose to leave  "
It's always like that you get a cheating male and he is the scum of the earth, you get a cheating wife and the husband gets the blame |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Oh unlos.....wife found him on here maybe
Having read the thread I can't say I'm totally shocked the OP choose to leave "
..
I don't think he left because he was 'bullied' off... I think he took on board the advice given.. The advice he asked for... And chose to act on it...
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Not being nasty mate but your on here and well are you sure she's not making her own plans to. Just a thought
If he's been cheating for 4+ years and blaming her, as he's doing here, I rather hope she is off doing her own thing and having fun.
I've spoken to her about spicing up our sex life like exploring different avenues! I've given her hints, she doesn't seem interested.
If she is having fun elsewhere then I am honestly happy for her. I would be understanding rather then be like I can have the fun and you can't.
I see what you're saying about cheating and maybe I am being selfish! I've only met two people on her and the last meet was a long time ago. I don't need to explain the reasons why I did it (no it wasn't tit for tat). "
seriously you'd be happy now that's a red flag |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
But is that a reason to stay single? I've been cheated on and shit on from a great height but I don't think it's put me off meeting someone...I would like to settle down and have kids so a little piece of my heart is still open.
In regards to the OP we don't know why he was on here for 4 years I hope that he can put his demons to bed and figure something out with his wife..
No not at all cheeky,I'm just looking at a positive for being single. I'd love to share my life with someone"
 |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Oh unlos.....wife found him on here maybe
Having read the thread I can't say I'm totally shocked the OP choose to leave
..
I don't think he left because he was 'bullied' off... I think he took on board the advice given.. The advice he asked for... And chose to act on it...
"
Yes he certainly did ask for advice....... |
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"There are alway's pluses in everything aren't there. I don't really like being single,but at least I won't have the devastation of someone cheating on me again.
But is that a reason to stay single? I've been cheated on and shit on from a great height but I don't think it's put me off meeting someone...I would like to settle down and have kids so a little piece of my heart is still open.
In regards to the OP we don't know why he was on here for 4 years I hope that he can put his demons to bed and figure something out with his wife..
No not at all cheeky,I'm just looking at a positive for being single. I'd love to share my life with someone
"
Ay go on get your coat you've pulled |
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