FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > something i don't get.
something i don't get.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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guys who are chatty every day for weeks on end then fuck off for weeks on end (probably coz they're busy chatting to someone else for weeks on end), then they come back to you, this is normal?
i don't like the inconsistency so ignore them. plus can chat to more than one person at a time so don't get why people do this? |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
I'm not keen on the ones who bug you for a meet, you then have a meet, and you never hear from them again, but I guess it's just a symptom of the site. I am happy not to regularly chat on here, but I do agree its the ones who seem very enthusiastic at first who then seem to lose interest. |
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Hey!
Maybe the other one promised to meet a date earlier than yours lol. I don't think it's that hard to keep up with 2 or 3 people. On the other hand, he might have felt more connection with the other one at that point. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm not keen on the ones who bug you for a meet, you then have a meet, and you never hear from them again, but I guess it's just a symptom of the site. I am happy not to regularly chat on here, but I do agree its the ones who seem very enthusiastic at first who then seem to lose interest."
i had one guy similar to that, talked every day then we met up eventually, then he'd just message me once a day (usually some compliment) and nothing else, even if i replied. i ignore him now as well. can't be doing with head games tbh.
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"I'm not keen on the ones who bug you for a meet, you then have a meet, and you never hear from them again, but I guess it's just a symptom of the site. I am happy not to regularly chat on here, but I do agree its the ones who seem very enthusiastic at first who then seem to lose interest."
Most guys practice NSA on here. If you enjoyed the meet them feel free to message him again. It's a 2-way traffic on here. I personally do keep in touch with my meets especially those I had more connection with although it doesn't really mean lets fuck again. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hey!
Maybe the other one promised to meet a date earlier than yours lol. I don't think it's that hard to keep up with 2 or 3 people. On the other hand, he might have felt more connection with the other one at that point."
I think its called ' not putting all your eggs in one basket '  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men are like dogs they will go to whoever pats them on the head and throws them a bit of meat now and again 
those with no self respect "
It's a swingers sight don't start a whole new debate about self respect  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hey!
Maybe the other one promised to meet a date earlier than yours lol. I don't think it's that hard to keep up with 2 or 3 people. On the other hand, he might have felt more connection with the other one at that point."
the one who messaged me today went quiet around the time we'd arranged to meet, a few guys have done that actually.
oh well, i know NSA isn't for me. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"I'm not keen on the ones who bug you for a meet, you then have a meet, and you never hear from them again, but I guess it's just a symptom of the site. I am happy not to regularly chat on here, but I do agree its the ones who seem very enthusiastic at first who then seem to lose interest.
Most guys practice NSA on here. If you enjoyed the meet them feel free to message him again. It's a 2-way traffic on here. I personally do keep in touch with my meets especially those I had more connection with although it doesn't really mean lets fuck again."
Its not the fact I want more. I am also here for NSA and am unlikely to want to see them again too (especially if they live a way away), but I usually send a 'thanks for the evening' message and a verification, and get tumbles back.
Of course, if the meet was shit, I am quite happy to never hear from them again.  I never said I wasn't a hypocrite. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hey!
Maybe the other one promised to meet a date earlier than yours lol. I don't think it's that hard to keep up with 2 or 3 people. On the other hand, he might have felt more connection with the other one at that point."
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"I don't chat for weeks to anyone. If I'm interested ill meet. If not why keep them hanging on."
Real talk!
Why chat to someone for 3 months when you might only meet them once. To me it doesn't add up as I could have spent those minutes sleeping, watching take me out (the gossip) lol or seeking those willing to meet next weekend. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like to chat with people but sometimes I feel like I'm being too eager. In that instance I tend to try not to message, firstly in the hope that they will message me, secondly so that I dont come over as pushy or needy |
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"Hey!
Maybe the other one promised to meet a date earlier than yours lol. I don't think it's that hard to keep up with 2 or 3 people. On the other hand, he might have felt more connection with the other one at that point.
I think its called ' not putting all your eggs in one basket ' "
High 5!
You understand my point perfectly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Isn't that just normal? I do this. I might chat to a guy for a while and then eventually you move on/have less to say etc then i might send them a message a few weeks or so later and we chat a bit again and so on... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men are like dogs they will go to whoever pats them on the head and throws them a bit of meat now and again "
I think that needs the word "Some" at the start of it. Huge generalisation
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"Hey!
Maybe the other one promised to meet a date earlier than yours lol. I don't think it's that hard to keep up with 2 or 3 people. On the other hand, he might have felt more connection with the other one at that point.
the one who messaged me today went quiet around the time we'd arranged to meet, a few guys have done that actually.
Can't be catching feelings or feeling sad about someone you haven't even met. Think positive and see it as their loss. Don't you think I've experienced the same before?? I don't rant because I slowly block their ass and never look back.
oh well, i know NSA isn't for me. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't chat for weeks to anyone. If I'm interested ill meet. If not why keep them hanging on.
Real talk!
Why chat to someone for 3 months when you might only meet them once. To me it doesn't add up as I could have spent those minutes sleeping, watching take me out (the gossip) lol or seeking those willing to meet next weekend."
exactly so much time wasted for one meet lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Isn't that just normal? I do this. I might chat to a guy for a while and then eventually you move on/have less to say etc then i might send them a message a few weeks or so later and we chat a bit again and so on..."
Yes, that seems normal. Some I chat with everyday about anything, some ill keep in contact with occasionally until an opportunity to meet presents itself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men are like dogs they will go to whoever pats them on the head and throws them a bit of meat now and again
I think that needs the word "Some" at the start of it. Huge generalisation
"
And here was me thinking that it was women who played more mind games than blokes  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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At least when you chat to them on and off for a while you get a feeling for there personality which to us is important. Does anybody really meet after just one message ? |
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It's a buyer's market, so I just ignore them, if I even notice.
I don't do tons of messaging, before taking it off-site, as there's a limit to what people want to chat about, that's not wank fodder, for some fantasist stringing you along. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men are like dogs they will go to whoever pats them on the head and throws them a bit of meat now and again
I think that needs the word "Some" at the start of it. Huge generalisation
And here was me thinking that it was women who played more mind games than blokes "
Or maybe "most" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men are like dogs they will go to whoever pats them on the head and throws them a bit of meat now and again
 "
Light hearted humour some just don't get it |
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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago
Filthy Fuckeryville |
I think I'm guilty of that too...
. Talk to a few people loads and if it doesn't turn into a meet (for whatever reason) then I move on to others. Sometimes I go back if I happen across them online or particularly fancied them or something they wanted?
Why waste time chatting forever?
Saying that there are also a few on here who I'll possibly only ever chat to!
Been talking to one who I met socially in a club in 2012 - said we'd play another time, he only lives ten miles away and it's STILL not happened!! Will it ever?! Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I was chatting to someone for weeks and a meet didn't look likely then I'm pretty certain I'd focus on someone where a meet was more likely. That doesn't mean I wouldn't go back to the original person at some point. It's about keeping options open.
If someone I hadn't met and hadn't arranged to meet got the arse because I wasn't pandering to their ego by messaging them I'd probably block them. Needy isn't attractive |
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"I'm not keen on the ones who bug you for a meet, you then have a meet, and you never hear from them again, but I guess it's just a symptom of the site. I am happy not to regularly chat on here, but I do agree its the ones who seem very enthusiastic at first who then seem to lose interest.
Most guys practice NSA on here. If you enjoyed the meet them feel free to message him again. It's a 2-way traffic on here. I personally do keep in touch with my meets especially those I had more connection with although it doesn't really mean lets fuck again.
Its not the fact I want more. I am also here for NSA and am unlikely to want to see them again too (especially if they live a way away), but I usually send a 'thanks for the evening' message and a verification, and get tumbles back.
Of course, if the meet was shit, I am quite happy to never hear from them again. I never said I wasn't a hypocrite."
I personally dislike those who don't even say a thank you after a meet or think it's useless to show simple courtesy by writing a verification. Even if the meet was shit, at least find something that was okay/nice about it and say it.
Example: She had a nice sofa or her bedroom was really clean and warm if that was the case.
I thought you meant saying hello again after verifications are done. My bad  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends on the context, if you hadn't replied to their last message or the conversation pitted out then sometimes its understandable for them to go away and come back with a new perspective.
Sometimes theres just nothing to say to someone! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think I'm guilty of that too...
. Talk to a few people loads and if it doesn't turn into a meet (for whatever reason) then I move on to others. Sometimes I go back if I happen across them online or particularly fancied them or something they wanted?
Why waste time chatting forever?
Saying that there are also a few on here who I'll possibly only ever chat to!
Been talking to one who I met socially in a club in 2012 - said we'd play another time, he only lives ten miles away and it's STILL not happened!! Will it ever?! Lol"
i think it's me that's changed tbh. i used to work like this and it didn't bother me, but now it does for some reason. i feel like i'm being messed about now but before i was ok with it. well apart from the guy who messages me every day and never replied, dunno what that shit was about but i'm sure he was being a dick. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Isn't that just normal? I do this. I might chat to a guy for a while and then eventually you move on/have less to say etc then i might send them a message a few weeks or so later and we chat a bit again and so on..."
Spot on! Its not bloody Facebook lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't chat for weeks to anyone. If I'm interested ill meet. If not why keep them hanging on.
Real talk!
Why chat to someone for 3 months when you might only meet them once. To me it doesn't add up as I could have spent those minutes sleeping, watching take me out (the gossip) lol or seeking those willing to meet next weekend."
I had a year of intermittent chatting with someone before we met. Sometimes life stops you from meeting but the attraction is strong |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Isn't that just normal? I do this. I might chat to a guy for a while and then eventually you move on/have less to say etc then i might send them a message a few weeks or so later and we chat a bit again and so on...
Spot on! Its not bloody Facebook lol"
I chat a hell of a lot more on here than Facebook |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I like to chat with people but sometimes I feel like I'm being too eager. In that instance I tend to try not to message, firstly in the hope that they will message me, secondly so that I dont come over as pushy or needy"
This is my approach.
I appreciate that women are probably chatting to a few other guys as well as myself, as well as dealing with all the one line messages, so I adopt a 'ping pong' approach and respond to the messages I get back but don't bombard with too many new ones! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Isn't that just normal? I do this. I might chat to a guy for a while and then eventually you move on/have less to say etc then i might send them a message a few weeks or so later and we chat a bit again and so on...
Spot on! Its not bloody Facebook lol
I chat a hell of a lot more on here than Facebook "
I make exceptions for you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I like to chat with people but sometimes I feel like I'm being too eager. In that instance I tend to try not to message, firstly in the hope that they will message me, secondly so that I dont come over as pushy or needy
This is my approach.
I appreciate that women are probably chatting to a few other guys as well as myself, as well as dealing with all the one line messages, so I adopt a 'ping pong' approach and respond to the messages I get back but don't bombard with too many new ones!"
I think this is the right approach, got told by a lady last night she doesn't like blokes that are to needy (won't be texting her as often) although she wasn't referring to me. |
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