Engulfed by flames,wich in turn burnt my wallet so i had no money for bus fare.And all this happened while i was holding my mobile phone so i couldnt ring you.Wich inturn sent me spiraling into depression.While in my depressive state i tried to comit suicide, wich i fucked up .This is how im typeing this message.

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By *ig badMan over a year ago

Up North :-)

"You nicked my idea lol its copyrighted you know........ok dont know where my house keys are and locked in house"

They were done years back

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By *ig badMan over a year ago

Up North :-)

Her her her her herrrrrrrrrrr peas

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I changed my mind.... you are too ugly.

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By *icksfocusMan over a year ago

Pontefract

Humped a bunny boiler and am now locked in a cellar with just water and viagra to survive on

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i just couldnt afford the condoms due to the current financial climate

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Jesus wants me for a moon beam.

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By *icksfocusMan over a year ago

Pontefract

"i just couldnt afford the condoms due to the current financial climate

"
Brilliant

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

keanu reeves just phoned and asked me for a date

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

klu klux klan have pinched all my sheets

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

[Removed by poster at 07/02/11 22:49:40]

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By *icksfocusMan over a year ago

Pontefract

Never meant to meet you in first place as i am a fake (no that would never be said as it is so true far too many times)

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Lord Lucan has just been discovered in my attic and the police want to question me.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Licking

Lost my Tongue so I couldn't rim you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

last time i did this sort of thing i got a very nasty rash down below

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Liquidation …. my arse went into liquidation and I have no more clean pants

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

last xmas i gave you my ass,but the very next day,you turned me away

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

mum made me go back to my room

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

nobody makes me feel the way you do.....sick

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

My dog ate the car keys and my mobile phone

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By *ensualfire88Man over a year ago

Edinburgh

I took a moment and actually LOOKED at your pics.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

never leave the house without my full body rubber suit on and i cant find any talc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Oral Clinkers

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple over a year ago

hexham

Pissed my pants laughing at your profile pics

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Pissed my pants laughing at your profile pics"

Quick Shits

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple over a year ago

hexham

ravaged by doggers on the way and now totally sore

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"ravaged by doggers on the way and now totally sore"

Shat myself...? Or...syphilisi? Shaving rash?

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By *ertnbeckyCouple over a year ago

oldham

traumatic experience reading your profile

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"traumatic experience reading your profile

"
under the influence of smirnoff ice

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

vacuum won't release my cock

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By *ezebelWoman over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

"vacuum won't release my cock

wanked earlier, can we make it tomorrow night instead?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

x-ray's have caused me to go limp

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By *utumnWoman over a year ago

leeds

Xpected the missus to be going to bingo but she stayed in

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By *icksfocusMan over a year ago

Pontefract

[Removed by poster at 08/02/11 00:37:57]

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By *ezebelWoman over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

"Xpected the missus to be going to bingo but she stayed in"

Yeti ate all my condoms

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By *icksfocusMan over a year ago

Pontefract

you can not be serious thought you were afake kike me whats the odds on finding a serious swinger?

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By *mumaWoman over a year ago

Livingston

zzzzzzzzzzzz, sorry fell asleep

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"traumatic experience reading your profile

under the influence of smirnoff ice "
Lol done that 1

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

C - cant be arsed

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