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Auntie Cheekychops
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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago
The land of grey peas and bacon |
"I have Tiger Balm but no one to rub it in?
Awww rub it on the flange and think of England 
Or A+E!!!!  "
Good call there will be some juicy doctors...oh there is a thought shagging a doctor in his scrubs  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Three white hens and four black hens lay as many eggs in five days as two white hens and four black hens lay in six days. Which colour hen lays the greatest number of eggs?  |
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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago
The land of grey peas and bacon |
"How can I get a six pack like wot shag tonight has without eating meat and not living in a gym? And do ladies prefer a flatter stomach or something with a bit of bounce and bouyancy? "
I like a bit of bounce |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I start tonight then I won't stop. 
I'm off to get a cider. 
-Courtney
Liquid apples. 
One of her 5 a day
Are we still talking apples? "
I think I might have more than one. Of apples and the other |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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And why is it the rule, “There are exceptions to every rule” is the only rule without exception, making itself the exception to the rule.
And now my head hurts |
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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago
The land of grey peas and bacon |
"Three white hens and four black hens lay as many eggs in five days as two white hens and four black hens lay in six days. Which colour hen lays the greatest number of eggs?
Goodness knows and you know what I do for a living so double "
I'm going with black |
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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago
The land of grey peas and bacon |
"And why is it the rule, “There are exceptions to every rule” is the only rule without exception, making itself the exception to the rule.
And now my head hurts"
Go and stand in the corner and think about your actions |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh bless ya hun. I don't think they're strong enough for mine.
Have vodka and think fuck it that's my motto "
I'm out of vodka, can I share yours please?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Three white hens and four black hens lay as many eggs in five days as two white hens and four black hens lay in six days. Which colour hen lays the greatest number of eggs?
Goodness knows and you know what I do for a living so double
I'm going with black "
Well I'd go black so a 50-50 chance between us |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh bless ya hun. I don't think they're strong enough for mine.
Have vodka and think fuck it that's my motto
I'm out of vodka, can I share yours please? "
I guess you're talking to cheeky. |
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By *arksMan
over a year ago
in the centre |
"Bungle off Rainbow used to wear pyjamas for bed but walk round naked during the day , its always bothered me why he did this
Because of zippy the dirty bugger "
Always had george down as the " behinid closed doors sexual dynamo " |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh bless ya hun. I don't think they're strong enough for mine.
Have vodka and think fuck it that's my motto
I'm out of vodka, can I share yours please?
I guess you're talking to cheeky. "
Curvygirl, would love to share vodka with you also if you have some  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Oh bless ya hun. I don't think they're strong enough for mine.
Have vodka and think fuck it that's my motto
I'm out of vodka, can I share yours please?
I guess you're talking to cheeky.
Curvygirl, would love to share vodka with you also if you have some "
I've a whole unopened bottle here!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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And to those people who say money can't buy you happiness. Well it can buy you a jet ski and have you ever seen a sad person on a jet ski? No didn't think so, it's impossible to be sad on a jet ski |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Three white hens and four black hens lay as many eggs in five days as two white hens and four black hens lay in six days. Which colour hen lays the greatest number of eggs?
Goodness knows and you know what I do for a living so double "
Are you a farmer? Tell me you are, that'd be cool! |
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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago
The land of grey peas and bacon |
"Oh bless ya hun. I don't think they're strong enough for mine.
Have vodka and think fuck it that's my motto
I'm out of vodka, can I share yours please?
I guess you're talking to cheeky.
Curvygirl, would love to share vodka with you also if you have some
I've a whole unopened bottle here!! "
It's calling you both |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Oh bless ya hun. I don't think they're strong enough for mine.
Have vodka and think fuck it that's my motto
I'm out of vodka, can I share yours please?
I guess you're talking to cheeky.
Curvygirl, would love to share vodka with you also if you have some
I've a whole unopened bottle here!! "
I'm happy to share with anyone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Oh bless ya hun. I don't think they're strong enough for mine.
Have vodka and think fuck it that's my motto
I'm out of vodka, can I share yours please?
I guess you're talking to cheeky.
Curvygirl, would love to share vodka with you also if you have some
I've a whole unopened bottle here!!
It's calling you both "
Vodka party |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Three white hens and four black hens lay as many eggs in five days as two white hens and four black hens lay in six days. Which colour hen lays the greatest number of eggs?
Goodness knows and you know what I do for a living so double
I'm going with black "
Ah, you had a 50/50 chance but ... Wrong!
5(3W + 4B) = 6(2W + 4B)
15W + 20B = 12W + 24B
3W = 4B
W = 1.33B
White hens lay more |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I need an adventure, but I need an adventure that will accommodate being a single dad, and the lack if physical fitness and suspected arthritis in my right foot, and repeatedly dislocation of my right shoulder and my serial procrastination lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In looking for a woman to tie me up and tease me while i watch my wife and her well hung lover make love again and again! Occasionally bringing me to ruined orgasm. My poor sperm cascading fruitlessly onto the cold floor, while his establishes itself within her....
Trouble is i can't find the man that comes with the woman!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dear Auntie Cheekychops,
I haven't been getting enough sleep for awhile now, Not getting to sleep until after 11-12pm and getting up at 630am, The bags under my eyes are starting to show, Apart from more sleep what advise would you give me for getting rid of them
Yours, Mr diddlyumptious |
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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago
The land of grey peas and bacon |
"Dear Auntie Cheekychops,
I haven't been getting enough sleep for awhile now, Not getting to sleep until after 11-12pm and getting up at 630am, The bags under my eyes are starting to show, Apart from more sleep what advise would you give me for getting rid of them
Yours, Mr diddlyumptious"
Cold cucumber and some under the eye cream |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Dear Auntie Cheekychops,
I haven't been getting enough sleep for awhile now, Not getting to sleep until after 11-12pm and getting up at 630am, The bags under my eyes are starting to show, Apart from more sleep what advise would you give me for getting rid of them
Yours, Mr diddlyumptious
Cold cucumber and some under the eye cream "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Three white hens and four black hens lay as many eggs in five days as two white hens and four black hens lay in six days. Which colour hen lays the greatest number of eggs?
Goodness knows and you know what I do for a living so double
I'm going with black
Ah, you had a 50/50 chance but ... Wrong!
5(3W + 4B) = 6(2W + 4B)
15W + 20B = 12W + 24B
3W = 4B
W = 1.33B
White hens lay more "
I'm a little turned on by that calculation.. how did that happen.... |
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By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago
CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. Staffs. BARMOUTH. The Lakes (Monthly) |
"Three white hens and four black hens lay as many eggs in five days as two white hens and four black hens lay in six days. Which colour hen lays the greatest number of eggs? "
The white hens xxxx right Yeh ....Please say yes else I will look a right nuptials xxxx |
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By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago
CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. Staffs. BARMOUTH. The Lakes (Monthly) |
"Three white hens and four black hens lay as many eggs in five days as two white hens and four black hens lay in six days. Which colour hen lays the greatest number of eggs?
The white hens xxxx right Yeh ....Please say yes else I will look a right nuptials xxxx"
Nuptials ?????? WTF ..... meant Numpty |
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"Three white hens and four black hens lay as many eggs in five days as two white hens and four black hens lay in six days. Which colour hen lays the greatest number of eggs?
Goodness knows and you know what I do for a living so double
I'm going with black
Ah, you had a 50/50 chance but ... Wrong!
5(3W + 4B) = 6(2W + 4B)
15W + 20B = 12W + 24B
3W = 4B
W = 1.33B
White hens lay more
I'm a little turned on by that calculation.. how did that happen.... "
I too love a good equation |
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By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago
CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. Staffs. BARMOUTH. The Lakes (Monthly) |
Shit the answer was above lol ..... anyway I worked it out by subtracting 2 white hens from the 3 white hens = 1
Subtract 4 black hens from 4 black hens = 0
So 1 whiten hen left to lay eggs xxxxx
Yayyyyyy get me xxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Dear Auntie Cheekychops
This is slightly embarrassing so I hope what I tell you is for your eyes only and kept private and confidential,
The thing is I haven't been having any luck with the ladies recently and have resorted to wanking a lot
And to make it more exciting I have been putting lipstick on my thumb and finger, Do you think I need help
Yours Mr ????? |
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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago
The land of grey peas and bacon |
"Dear Auntie Cheekychops
This is slightly embarrassing so I hope what I tell you is for your eyes only and kept private and confidential,
The thing is I haven't been having any luck with the ladies recently and have resorted to wanking a lot
And to make it more exciting I have been putting lipstick on my thumb and finger, Do you think I need help
Yours Mr ?????"
As long as it's a red lippy you should be ok |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Dear Miss cheekychops..
In looking for a woman to tie me up and tease me while i watch my wife and her well hung lover make love again and again! Occasionally bringing me to ruined orgasm. My poor sperm cascading fruitlessly onto the cold floor, while his establishes itself within her....
Trouble is i can't find the man that comes with the woman! |
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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago
The land of grey peas and bacon |
"Dear Miss cheekychops..
In looking for a woman to tie me up and tease me while i watch my wife and her well hung lover make love again and again! Occasionally bringing me to ruined orgasm. My poor sperm cascading fruitlessly onto the cold floor, while his establishes itself within her....
Trouble is i can't find the man that comes with the woman! "
Buy a extendable dick |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
Dear Auntie Cheeky,
I have just caught the skin in one of my armpits in my epilator. I now have a small cut, which is hurting like the blazes and a fuck off big bruise.
And I know putting deodorant on tomorrow is going to kill.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Dear Auntie Cheeky,
I have just caught the skin in one of my armpits in my epilator. I now have a small cut, which is hurting like the blazes and a fuck off big bruise.
And I know putting deodorant on tomorrow is going to kill.
"
Think you need to go to the foul language and farming thread to relieve some expletives. |
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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago
The land of grey peas and bacon |
"Dear Auntie Cheeky,
I have just caught the skin in one of my armpits in my epilator. I now have a small cut, which is hurting like the blazes and a fuck off big bruise.
And I know putting deodorant on tomorrow is going to kill.
"
Spray it with some perfume |
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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago
The land of grey peas and bacon |
"Dear Auntie Cheeky,
I have just caught the skin in one of my armpits in my epilator. I now have a small cut, which is hurting like the blazes and a fuck off big bruise.
And I know putting deodorant on tomorrow is going to kill.
Think you need to go to the foul language and farming thread to relieve some expletives. "
Farming thread |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Dear Auntie Cheeky,
I have just caught the skin in one of my armpits in my epilator. I now have a small cut, which is hurting like the blazes and a fuck off big bruise.
And I know putting deodorant on tomorrow is going to kill.
Think you need to go to the foul language and farming thread to relieve some expletives.
Farming thread "
** farting!! . Ffs. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Dear Auntie Cheeky,
I have just caught the skin in one of my armpits in my epilator. I now have a small cut, which is hurting like the blazes and a fuck off big bruise.
And I know putting deodorant on tomorrow is going to kill.
Spray it with some perfume "
Pass! |
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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago
The land of grey peas and bacon |
"Dear Auntie Cheeky,
I have just caught the skin in one of my armpits in my epilator. I now have a small cut, which is hurting like the blazes and a fuck off big bruise.
And I know putting deodorant on tomorrow is going to kill.
Think you need to go to the foul language and farming thread to relieve some expletives.
Farming thread
** farting!! . Ffs. "
I don't think fabs like animal farm |
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By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago
CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. Staffs. BARMOUTH. The Lakes (Monthly) |
"Dear Auntie Cheeky,
I have just caught the skin in one of my armpits in my epilator. I now have a small cut, which is hurting like the blazes and a fuck off big bruise.
And I know putting deodorant on tomorrow is going to kill.
Think you need to go to the foul language and farming thread to relieve some expletives.
Farming thread
** farting!! . Ffs.
I don't think fabs like animal farm "
I forsee a busy day at work tomorrow. ... do you wanna do my shift for me pleaseeee xxxxx |
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