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Waiting for something better to come along
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ok, I've already posted it on the rant thread but it just got me thinking, how many hesitate to confirm a meet in the hopes that a better offer will come alone, I suspect guys do this the most, going from past experience from our couples profile and what the Mrs has told me. They seem to be all up for it the the day or day before then just ignore your message but then mail you when it's too late.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've no idea.....
But I once received an offer to meet from a guys who bluntly informed me he was only asking because his first choice wasn't available...  |
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No. Never.
Rude.
Make a plan and stick to it. I'd never do that to anyone regardless of whether it be meeting friends or a sex thing.
Women who dump their mates in favour of a bloke lose all of my respect in an instant. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had guys do this to me before, especially if you've just arranged a social then a guaranteed fuck comes along.
For me I either want to meet someone or I don't, and if plans are made I'll stick to them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. Never.
Rude.
Make a plan and stick to it. I'd never do that to anyone regardless of whether it be meeting friends or a sex thing.
Women who dump their mates in favour of a bloke lose all of my respect in an instant. "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like to think I'm pretty immune to this sort of behaviour by the way that i have to arrange my meets. It can take months and in a couple of cases years for me to arrange meets with some so i like to think that anyone that has stayed in touch in all that time must really want to meet me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The only thing that comes first before my meets is my teens . If I have made plans I will always try and keep to them . You treat people how u want to be treated xxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We don't do it. I like the buildup to a meet and I am a firm believer in sticking to plans already made. If I said I will meet you, for sex or a social, it was because I wanted to and I will follow through. I don't even look after we plan something and we've had offers for days when we've had planned meets and we never cancel for the new offer.
On the other hand, single guys have done this to us. One memorable example explained how his grandfather was ill in the hospital. Judging by his verification the next day, he found a very beautiful single woman to kiss away the pain 
-Courtney |
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"Ok, I've already posted it on the rant thread but it just got me thinking, how many hesitate to confirm a meet in the hopes that a better offer will come alone, I suspect guys do this the most, going from past experience from our couples profile and what the Mrs has told me. They seem to be all up for it the the day or day before then just ignore your message but then mail you when it's too late. "
I wouldn't dream of doing that and have always turned up to meets as I would do to any appointment or arranged meeting in any walk of life. It's good manners on Fab and good manners in life in general. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. Never.
Rude.
Make a plan and stick to it. I'd never do that to anyone regardless of whether it be meeting friends or a sex thing.
Women who dump their mates in favour of a bloke lose all of my respect in an instant. "
+1 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't do it. I like the buildup to a meet and I am a firm believer in sticking to plans already made. If I said I will meet you, for sex or a social, it was because I wanted to and I will follow through. I don't even look after we plan something and we've had offers for days when we've had planned meets and we never cancel for the new offer.
On the other hand, single guys have done this to us. One memorable example explained how his grandfather was ill in the hospital. Judging by his verification the next day, he found a very beautiful single woman to kiss away the pain so right plonker he was then ?
-Courtney "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. Never.
Rude.
Make a plan and stick to it. I'd never do that to anyone regardless of whether it be meeting friends or a sex thing.
Women who dump their mates in favour of a bloke lose all of my respect in an instant. "
This from my point of view too!
However - I know a lot of guys on here who do as the op suggested! Not necessarily for something better - but I think many guys are constantly on the hunt for a new challenge or a 'shiny new fuck' as I call it - particularly on this site!
A couple of times guys I have seen before have been very keen to meet up again - only to develop 'flu' the day before or on the day! Then the new veri goes up!
I don't rant or block - I just hope for their sake that the shiny new fuck was a REALLY good one - because I obviously don't see them again and they've lost my friendship too!!  xx
Ps - I know there ARE nice guys on here too - or I wouldn't still be here!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. Never.
Rude.
Make a plan and stick to it. I'd never do that to anyone regardless of whether it be meeting friends or a sex thing.
Women who dump their mates in favour of a bloke lose all of my respect in an instant. "
This! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Unless someone has said.. Yes I am definitely going to meet you on such a such day/time..
Then I don't see a problem
I have never arranged a meet unless I can guarantee I can make it. Other than emergencies at home I wouldnt cancel.. And never have.
I have had people say they can not make it after arranging a meet.. But I don't get in a huff.. It happens.. Not the end of the world. I've also had people nit confirming.. I just leave them to it and don't stress...or keep messaging to try force an answer.
To assume someone is not confirming because 'they are waiting for something better to come along'.. Says more about you than the other person... There could be many reasons.. And if that's what you think.. Then what is to say they won't drop you when someone' better ' comes along anyway.
Until a meet is confirmed.. It is not a meet.. So stop stressing..
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
To assume someone is not confirming because 'they are waiting for something better to come along'.. Says more about you than the other person... There could be many reasons.. And if that's what you think.. Then what is to say they won't drop you when someone' better ' comes along anyway.
Until a meet is confirmed.. It is not a meet.. So stop stressing..
"
It was confirmed I was checking they remember my address, but just had a message, indirectly telling me that te person I was waiting on has actually just confirmed with them, still not had a reply but deleted it all now and moving on, ah well, onwards and upwards as they say. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a meet arranged for last Friday which was 'iffy'. I was offered another meet but thought it was only right to decline.
The original meet didn't happen so arguably I lost out however I don't like to cancel already organised plans |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. Never.
Rude.
Make a plan and stick to it. I'd never do that to anyone regardless of whether it be meeting friends or a sex thing.
Women who dump their mates in favour of a bloke lose all of my respect in an instant. "
Grown ups actually do that?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had 3 people ask to meet on the same day. I hadn't confirmed with any and ended up saying I wasn't available to all of them. Once confirmed I wouldn't cancel for someone else. I've been ditched,by a regular buddy,for someone else. We had had a "Are you free Sunday? Yes I am" conversation,on the Saturday. Sunday afternoon I was lolling about,thinking I should get in the bath and start getting ready. I texted him asking if we were still meeting and he said he wouldn't be able to make it. Monday came and the verification went up. I didn't blame him,she was sexy and too tempting to turn down for me . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. Never.
Rude.
Make a plan and stick to it. I'd never do that to anyone regardless of whether it be meeting friends or a sex thing.
Women who dump their mates in favour of a bloke lose all of my respect in an instant.
Grown ups actually do that? "
Should we drag our mates with us when we visit our boyfriends? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
To assume someone is not confirming because 'they are waiting for something better to come along'.. Says more about you than the other person... There could be many reasons.. And if that's what you think.. Then what is to say they won't drop you when someone' better ' comes along anyway.
Until a meet is confirmed.. It is not a meet.. So stop stressing..
It was confirmed I was checking they remember my address, but just had a message, indirectly telling me that te person I was waiting on has actually just confirmed with them, still not had a reply but deleted it all now and moving on, ah well, onwards and upwards as they say. "
Oh.. Well that's not what your original post says.. It's says they where hesitating to confirm..... But yes onwards |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Unless someone has said.. Yes I am definitely going to meet you on such a such day/time..
Then I don't see a problem
I have never arranged a meet unless I can guarantee I can make it. Other than emergencies at home I wouldnt cancel.. And never have.
I have had people say they can not make it after arranging a meet.. But I don't get in a huff.. It happens.. Not the end of the world. I've also had people nit confirming.. I just leave them to it and don't stress...or keep messaging to try force an answer.
To assume someone is not confirming because 'they are waiting for something better to come along'.. Says more about you than the other person... There could be many reasons.. And if that's what you think.. Then what is to say they won't drop you when someone' better ' comes along anyway.
Until a meet is confirmed.. It is not a meet.. So stop stressing..
"
Says what about me? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unless someone has said.. Yes I am definitely going to meet you on such a such day/time..
Then I don't see a problem
I have never arranged a meet unless I can guarantee I can make it. Other than emergencies at home I wouldnt cancel.. And never have.
I have had people say they can not make it after arranging a meet.. But I don't get in a huff.. It happens.. Not the end of the world. I've also had people nit confirming.. I just leave them to it and don't stress...or keep messaging to try force an answer.
To assume someone is not confirming because 'they are waiting for something better to come along'.. Says more about you than the other person... There could be many reasons.. And if that's what you think.. Then what is to say they won't drop you when someone' better ' comes along anyway.
Until a meet is confirmed.. It is not a meet.. So stop stressing..
Says what about me?"
It was not directed at you.. Or anyone for that matter... You asked a general question.. I answered with my opinion like every body else has
You didn't ask us our opinion on your situation.. And I don't know it.. .
You said if people are hesitating to confirm ..that to me is not a confirmed meet.. So I stand by my answer to that.
And the person stressing over an unconfirmed meet, thinking the other person is waiting for something better to come along, is presumptuous and likely to do it themselves in my opinion.
To clarify...you did not say anything about your own situation in original post.. So I don't know why you think I was directing my answer specifically at you.. It Was in relation to a post you made |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
For me If I have been told that someone can't make a meet, so then I say fine but I will be advertising for a new meet
If I can't make a meet the chances are that I can't make a meet at all, but would email to say that I can't make 100 mile journey |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Unless someone has said.. Yes I am definitely going to meet you on such a such day/time..
Then I don't see a problem
I have never arranged a meet unless I can guarantee I can make it. Other than emergencies at home I wouldnt cancel.. And never have.
I have had people say they can not make it after arranging a meet.. But I don't get in a huff.. It happens.. Not the end of the world. I've also had people nit confirming.. I just leave them to it and don't stress...or keep messaging to try force an answer.
To assume someone is not confirming because 'they are waiting for something better to come along'.. Says more about you than the other person... There could be many reasons.. And if that's what you think.. Then what is to say they won't drop you when someone' better ' comes along anyway.
Until a meet is confirmed.. It is not a meet.. So stop stressing..
Says what about me?
It was not directed at you.. Or anyone for that matter... You asked a general question.. I answered with my opinion like every body else has
You didn't ask us our opinion on your situation.. And I don't know it.. .
You said if people are hesitating to confirm ..that to me is not a confirmed meet.. So I stand by my answer to that.
And the person stressing over an unconfirmed meet, thinking the other person is waiting for something better to come along, is presumptuous and likely to do it themselves in my opinion.
To clarify...you did not say anything about your own situation in original post.. So I don't know why you think I was directing my answer specifically at you.. It Was in relation to a post you made "
Ah ok |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had guys do this to me before, especially if you've just arranged a social then a guaranteed fuck comes along.
For me I either want to meet someone or I don't, and if plans are made I'll stick to them. "
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Happens to us now and again mainly because we make it clear the first meet is social only so if an opportunity for more comes along they just fail to confirm. It's a risk we're prepared to take and confirms we weren't right for them. |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
I've never done that. If I arrange to meet I'll be there unless I have to take care of one of my kids.
It's happened to me though. I was waiting for confirmation for the following day. Didn't hear anything so I text him to find out he'd met a woman from 'the real world' and wanted to give it a go. I thought that was quite sweet and I was pleased for him. I told him so, however, I also told him that even though this is fab he should have grown a set of balls by now and should have let me know!!!!
I then got a message a couple of weeks later saying it hadn't worked out and would I meet him after all. Cheeky fucker eh???!!!! |
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"I've never done that. If I arrange to meet I'll be there unless I have to take care of one of my kids.
It's happened to me though. I was waiting for confirmation for the following day. Didn't hear anything so I text him to find out he'd met a woman from 'the real world' and wanted to give it a go. I thought that was quite sweet and I was pleased for him. I told him so, however, I also told him that even though this is fab he should have grown a set of balls by now and should have let me know!!!!
I then got a message a couple of weeks later saying it hadn't worked out and would I meet him after all. Cheeky fucker eh???!!!! "
Did you meet him? |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
"I've never done that. If I arrange to meet I'll be there unless I have to take care of one of my kids.
It's happened to me though. I was waiting for confirmation for the following day. Didn't hear anything so I text him to find out he'd met a woman from 'the real world' and wanted to give it a go. I thought that was quite sweet and I was pleased for him. I told him so, however, I also told him that even though this is fab he should have grown a set of balls by now and should have let me know!!!!
I then got a message a couple of weeks later saying it hadn't worked out and would I meet him after all. Cheeky fucker eh???!!!!
Did you meet him?"
Christ no. No need to be anyone's plan b when you're on Fab  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've never done that. If I arrange to meet I'll be there unless I have to take care of one of my kids.
It's happened to me though. I was waiting for confirmation for the following day. Didn't hear anything so I text him to find out he'd met a woman from 'the real world' and wanted to give it a go. I thought that was quite sweet and I was pleased for him. I told him so, however, I also told him that even though this is fab he should have grown a set of balls by now and should have let me know!!!!
I then got a message a couple of weeks later saying it hadn't worked out and would I meet him after all. Cheeky fucker eh???!!!! "
Similar here. Pestered for a meet but never confirmed one then saw his status about the most wonderful women he'd met. Stopped messaging me then all of a sudden starts messaging again. So I asked him about her and he said she turned out to be a nut job so thought he try me again!!! He got his answer!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We've been kept waiting for confirmation and then days after being told they would reply, find out they were busy with work and couldn't message us despite being online regularly. This was a couple but we have also had lots of ignored confirmations from other groups so it's universal.
As for waiting for better meets, we find there are no better or worse meets. They are all unique and carry their own memories. I think this is where some may go wrong, they have expectations and we go into them open mindedly and not in comparison with others. If we keep this in mind, we never feel the need to hang on for others in the hope they might be better, cos they're all good! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We've been kept waiting for confirmation and then days after being told they would reply, find out they were busy with work and couldn't message us despite being online regularly. This was a couple but we have also had lots of ignored confirmations from other groups so it's universal.
As for waiting for better meets, we find there are no better or worse meets. They are all unique and carry their own memories. I think this is where some may go wrong, they have expectations and we go into them open mindedly and not in comparison with others. If we keep this in mind, we never feel the need to hang on for others in the hope they might be better, cos they're all good!"
Sorry to hear this. People can be so unreliable. I hope your next meet gose well |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't hesitate to confirm a meet in case something better comes along, if I've made plans with someone then I stick to it.
What I do have to do sometimes is work out the logistics / timings of when I can meet them, which has lead to a few people asking if they're being sidelined for another, which they're not. |
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