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A perception of you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

The voices thread made me think of an exercise in work I once did. Participants anonymously wrote opinions of a peer,then you got to read them.

I was mortified to read that I was intimidating and confident and appeared aloof

What do people make of you that you think is wrong?

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By *uxom redCouple  over a year ago

Shrewsbury

That I am confident. I'm really quite shy but I will talk to anyone about anything. Red

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

An opinionated, patronising twat. Who thinks he's funny and knows everything.

But kind hearted and honest.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire

Guess it depends how well they know me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"An opinionated, patronising twat. Who thinks he's funny and knows everything.

But kind hearted and honest. "

funny how the most brash and confident are deep down the opposite.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS  over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"

What do people make of you that you think is wrong?"

Voodoo dolls.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

What do people make of you that you think is wrong?

Voodoo dolls. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If people have an opinion of me then that's cool. I can't say they are wrong. That's their opinion. I must have done something for them to think that way.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"An opinionated, patronising twat. Who thinks he's funny and knows everything.

But kind hearted and honest. funny how the most brash and confident are deep down the opposite."

I am the least confident person you could ever meet,but I will stand my ground if I feel someone is being rude or trying to bully me.

As a footnote to mine can I add socially awkward.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Not a scooby doo

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

That I'm cold. I don't really do hugs, crying at weddings etc., gushing OTT displays of affection or friendship. But I'm not aloof or cold, I'm just more introverted and reserved than most people seem to be. I still feel things deeply.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"An opinionated, patronising twat. Who thinks he's funny and knows everything. "

I have been described as this too.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

in general people are often surprised that when they get to know me I'm not as sweet & innocent as they 1st thought

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"An opinionated, patronising twat. Who thinks he's funny and knows everything.

I have been described as this too. "

In all honesty isn't this 99% of forum posters?

Just sayin, no offence meant

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester

That I'm a flert.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"That I'm cold. I don't really do hugs, crying at weddings etc., gushing OTT displays of affection or friendship. But I'm not aloof or cold, I'm just more introverted and reserved than most people seem to be. I still feel things deeply."

First opinions of others can be both wrong and hurtful. Betaris box? Introverts are very complex people who probably spend more time reflecting and being sensitive to others than many realise.

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I don't know. I've asked!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"That I'm cold. I don't really do hugs, crying at weddings etc., gushing OTT displays of affection or friendship. But I'm not aloof or cold, I'm just more introverted and reserved than most people seem to be. I still feel things deeply."

I'm exactly like this!

Except that I am cold. I think people keep thinking they will see a warmer side to me, but there isn't one.

-Courtney

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"in general people are often surprised that when they get to know me I'm not as sweet & innocent as they 1st thought

"

When you free

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"in general people are often surprised that when they get to know me I'm not as sweet & innocent as they 1st thought

"

look out you're about to get lots of wannabes mailing you now.

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"

What do people make of you that you think is wrong?

Voodoo dolls. "

Rather too witty for before Subday church.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think I display a more confident version of me on here. I'm not shy, but I'm not life and soul either. I still have 'fat girl' in my head and I think that effects the version of myself I show.

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"I don't know. I've asked! "

What about this?

Easy going good natured, sexually liberated to sensitive at times, intelligent and witty.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"An opinionated, patronising twat. Who thinks he's funny and knows everything.

I have been described as this too.

In all honesty isn't this 99% of forum posters?

Just sayin, no offence meant "

No offence taken.

Mine may be because I usually have a quick retort to their comments.

"Smart-Arse; for one to be a smart-arse, first one has to be smart. Otherwise, you're just an arse." Is a personal favourite.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think I display a more confident version of me on here. I'm not shy, but I'm not life and soul either. I still have 'fat girl' in my head and I think that effects the version of myself I show."

I understand that thought process

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think people think we are sex crazed perverts , who will shag anything .

In reality , we are as selective as the next person and although we enjoy swinging , it's not the be all and end all .

Many a night out we can't wait to get home and get ravage each other , sex with others is merely a prelude to the best bit

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"I don't know. I've asked!

What about this?

Easy going good natured, sexually liberated to sensitive at times, intelligent and witty."

Update: and a twat who doesn't listen.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was told may years ago that people felt I was unapproachable and intimidating in a work environment I thought I was being assertive it took a long time to change people's perception of me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"That I'm cold. I don't really do hugs, crying at weddings etc., gushing OTT displays of affection or friendship. But I'm not aloof or cold, I'm just more introverted and reserved than most people seem to be. I still feel things deeply."

This.. Exactly for me too

And that I'm too honest for my own good

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"I think people think we are sex crazed perverts , who will shag anything .

In reality , we are as selective as the next person and although we enjoy swinging , it's not the be all and end all .

Many a night out we can't wait to get home and get ravage each other , sex with others is merely a prelude to the best bit "

I'll be honest before we chatted I completely had the wrong idea of you in fact scared the shot out of me but now I'd love to meet you both

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Peoples perceptions always surprise me. Calm and confident is the usual one. I'm just as panicky and nervous as anyone else.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire

I'm to modest to put mine

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

That im always happy amd confident. Sometimes im moody as fuck...about every 28 days as it happens

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"An opinionated, patronising twat. Who thinks he's funny and knows everything.

I have been described as this too.

In all honesty isn't this 99% of forum posters?

Just sayin, no offence meant "

I'm in the 1% bracket then

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Either that I'm too nice or kind..

I like to think I am nice and kind but not a walkover

Or that I look mischievous ... Can't argue with that one

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm not sure.

I'm a lot shyer than I maybe come across and I'm not a very confident person.

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"I'm to modest to put mine "

Surely not?

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By *ola.Woman  over a year ago

Just where I need to be.


"That I'm cold. I don't really do hugs, crying at weddings etc., gushing OTT displays of affection or friendship. But I'm not aloof or cold, I'm just more introverted and reserved than most people seem to be. I still feel things deeply."

To a degree this is me. Until I get to know someone. I do think people think I am aloof but I can't do the false flattery.I am introverted and I think it comes across as being cold.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

That I'm a middle aged vanilla bore!

I messaged a guy on pof who said thanks but no thanks. Fair enough

A couple of months later he messaged me here I sent him a face pic and laughed saying he had turned me down

He later explained I look very straight laced in reality. He's since learnt I'm the polar opposite hahaha

I quite like the fact i can look and act so differently

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"That im always happy amd confident. Sometimes im moody as fuck...about every 28 days as it happens "

Owwww God that rings bells

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By *iewMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

I am aloof and cold & the older I get, the more I become this way.

I have little time for faux hugs, kisses and other things that truly make me

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By *ee VianteWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

If I start trying to answer this I'll still be writing at dinner time.

I'm a shy, retiring, delicate little flower really.

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"That I'm cold. I don't really do hugs, crying at weddings etc., gushing OTT displays of affection or friendship. But I'm not aloof or cold, I'm just more introverted and reserved than most people seem to be. I still feel things deeply.

To a degree this is me. Until I get to know someone. I do think people think I am aloof but I can't do the false flattery.I am introverted and I think it comes across as being cold."

You've never come across like that to me. If you did I'd have never contacted you and that's still the best mail I've ever sent. Roll on the white night bullshit

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think people think we are sex crazed perverts , who will shag anything .

In reality , we are as selective as the next person and although we enjoy swinging , it's not the be all and end all .

Many a night out we can't wait to get home and get ravage each other , sex with others is merely a prelude to the best bit

I'll be honest before we chatted I completely had the wrong idea of you in fact scared the shot out of me but now I'd love to meet you both "

Exactly my point , and everyone we meet and chat to says the same thing .

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I am aloof and cold & the older I get, the more I become this way.

I have little time for faux hugs, kisses and other things that truly make me "

This is others perception? You seem to be a live and let live sort in here.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Never done the exercise but would love to know what people think about me in truth... I can be impatient and quite rude but if you're a friend I'd move heaven and earth to help.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire

If I had to chose one word that's used most commonly to describe me its earthy

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By *yldstyleWoman  over a year ago

A world of my own

I think I give out the confident strong independent woman vibe.

However a lot of the time I feel the complete opposite. I'm just not one to let everyone know

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By *iewMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn


"I am aloof and cold & the older I get, the more I become this way.

I have little time for faux hugs, kisses and other things that truly make me

This is others perception? You seem to be a live and let live sort in here."

yes, I used/use aloof to distance myself from people.

in my teens, I was badly bullied for being 'gay' and I used this method to get me through things... If I was subjected to people shouting names at me, I would focus on something ahead and blank them out....

and I still do this to a certain degree.

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"I think people think we are sex crazed perverts , who will shag anything .

In reality , we are as selective as the next person and although we enjoy swinging , it's not the be all and end all .

Many a night out we can't wait to get home and get ravage each other , sex with others is merely a prelude to the best bit

I'll be honest before we chatted I completely had the wrong idea of you in fact scared the shot out of me but now I'd love to meet you both

Exactly my point , and everyone we meet and chat to says the same thing .

"

Shows what bollex words on a screen can be doesn't it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Similar that I'm aloof and snobby when in actual fact I'm shy and timid.....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"An opinionated, patronising twat. Who thinks he's funny and knows everything.

I have been described as this too.

In all honesty isn't this 99% of forum posters?

Just sayin, no offence meant "

Definitely applies to me

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By *iamondjoeMan  over a year ago

Glastonbury

Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A colleague at work once asked everyone to use one word to describe me.

There were the usual insults like tart, slut (very common language used between us at my work ) but the two words used the most were "unique" and "complicated"

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me "

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

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By *manda63Woman  over a year ago

Southampton

My boss probably thinks I'm stupid

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions? "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

What do people make of you that you think is wrong?

Voodoo dolls. "

Pmsl post of the week

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By *iamondjoeMan  over a year ago

Glastonbury


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions? "

You have to know a little bit more about me to understand my response, more than I care to go in to here and now.

But I've had a life-time of being different, singled-out and even mocked so I've taught myself not to give a flying fuck what others think.

I'm only responsible to the people I love.

And they know me well enough already.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire

If I had no friends, and everyone percieved me in the same negative way and I wasn't happy with it is look at changing myself

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"That I'm cold. I don't really do hugs, crying at weddings etc., gushing OTT displays of affection or friendship. But I'm not aloof or cold, I'm just more introverted and reserved than most people seem to be. I still feel things deeply.

To a degree this is me. Until I get to know someone. I do think people think I am aloof but I can't do the false flattery.I am introverted and I think it comes across as being cold."

Yes the people I care about know I care about them, even if I don't make it obvious. But I've been told I give off indifference before, so I do try harder to be outwardly 'nice' when I meet new people now, as I'd hate to make someone else feel uncomfortable.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I've had a lot of people say i initially come off as arrogant but am better when you get to know me.

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions? "

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance "

I want to shove your K and W keys into your nostrils!!!

Know damn it

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

You have to know a little bit more about me to understand my response, more than I care to go in to here and now.

But I've had a life-time of being different, singled-out and even mocked so I've taught myself not to give a flying fuck what others think.

I'm only responsible to the people I love.

And they know me well enough already."

It's wasn't a judgement my friend and I hope you didn't perceive it to be so. We're all unique....be a first hand version of yourself not a second hand version of someone else as they say.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance "

I care, because I've had people tell me they didn't know if I liked them or felt uncomfortable because they thought I didn't want to be there, when that wasn't at all the case. I don't want to make other people feel uncomfortable so have tried to slightly modify my behaviour in recognition of that.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I am aloof and cold & the older I get, the more I become this way.

I have little time for faux hugs, kisses and other things that truly make me

This is others perception? You seem to be a live and let live sort in here.

yes, I used/use aloof to distance myself from people.

in my teens, I was badly bullied for being 'gay' and I used this method to get me through things... If I was subjected to people shouting names at me, I would focus on something ahead and blank them out....

and I still do this to a certain degree."

Do you sometimes find that you're shutting out everything, not just the negativity from people?

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By *adystephanieTV/TS  over a year ago

glos

Most think I do a lot of knitting, like playing with fluffy kittens and butter wouldn't melt...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think people generally don't ever see the sensitive side of me. I have an "i don't care" exterior. I'm no good at small talk as i never seem to be able to say the right thing so people assume I'm being rude when i distance myself or don't contribute to group discussions. Truth is i don't want to sound like a twat.

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance

I want to shove your K and W keys into your nostrils!!!

Know damn it "

I don't care

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" The voices thread made me think of an exercise in work I once did. Participants anonymously wrote opinions of a peer,then you got to read them.

I was mortified to read that I was intimidating and confident and appeared aloof

"

I've had this done before and it's horrible. Just because everyone has an opinion, it doesn't mean all opinions are equally valid!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'd hate to think what my colleagues think of me.

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By *iewMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn


"I am aloof and cold & the older I get, the more I become this way.

I have little time for faux hugs, kisses and other things that truly make me

This is others perception? You seem to be a live and let live sort in here.

yes, I used/use aloof to distance myself from people.

in my teens, I was badly bullied for being 'gay' and I used this method to get me through things... If I was subjected to people shouting names at me, I would focus on something ahead and blank them out....

and I still do this to a certain degree.

Do you sometimes find that you're shutting out everything, not just the negativity from people?"

I think a little if I am honest.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


" The voices thread made me think of an exercise in work I once did. Participants anonymously wrote opinions of a peer,then you got to read them.

I was mortified to read that I was intimidating and confident and appeared aloof

I've had this done before and it's horrible. Just because everyone has an opinion, it doesn't mean all opinions are equally valid! "

very true...but is interesting nonetheless and prompts important reflection if there's a recurring theme?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance "

Is it a case of people not bothering to get to know the real you or you not allowing them to do so? What you say above makes me feel you'd come across as a little aloof & closed.

Not a judgment just an observation x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I am aloof and cold & the older I get, the more I become this way.

I have little time for faux hugs, kisses and other things that truly make me

This is others perception? You seem to be a live and let live sort in here.

yes, I used/use aloof to distance myself from people.

in my teens, I was badly bullied for being 'gay' and I used this method to get me through things... If I was subjected to people shouting names at me, I would focus on something ahead and blank them out....

and I still do this to a certain degree.

Do you sometimes find that you're shutting out everything, not just the negativity from people?

I think a little if I am honest.

"

I'm not a professional but live in the world not in your head. Those that matter come from surprisingly unexpected places and friendships.

I think you're one of the good guys from reading your posts.

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"If I had to chose one word that's used most commonly to describe me its earthy"

Hahahaha! Farm yard earthy

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance

I want to shove your K and W keys into your nostrils!!!

Know damn it

I don't care "

That was a joke but seriously me not being able to spell is part of me and all my life I've had to work 10 times harder than everyone else because of it. I've been called every name you can think of because of it and it's been a huge part of the making of me and I hope it shows just how proud I am of what I've become and who I am. By the way I didn't take any offence at your post

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

caring and sensitive yet confident and fun loving

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire


"If I had to chose one word that's used most commonly to describe me its earthy

Hahahaha! Farm yard earthy "

happy as a pig in shit maybe.

Don't know its the one most frequent word.

Someone said it was cause I looked like a witch

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance

Is it a case of people not bothering to get to know the real you or you not allowing them to do so? What you say above makes me feel you'd come across as a little aloof & closed.

Not a judgment just an observation x"

No I expect people to get me wrong to start with and am only to willing to show the real me. What I mentioned was people who judge me and can't be bothered finding out if it's true

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We have peer assessments at work. They ask us to give feedback, both positive and negative.

I like it. I'm not perfect- no-one is. It's interesting to see what other people's opinions are of me, and then decide if I should act on them. I find it odd when people at work get all distressed about it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm really not bothered what people on here think of me, they don't know me.

I do know what people in my life think of me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance

Is it a case of people not bothering to get to know the real you or you not allowing them to do so? What you say above makes me feel you'd come across as a little aloof & closed.

Not a judgment just an observation x

No I expect people to get me wrong to start with and am only to willing to show the real me. What I mentioned was people who judge me and can't be bothered finding out if it's true "

Ah I see.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" The voices thread made me think of an exercise in work I once did. Participants anonymously wrote opinions of a peer,then you got to read them.

I was mortified to read that I was intimidating and confident and appeared aloof

I've had this done before and it's horrible. Just because everyone has an opinion, it doesn't mean all opinions are equally valid! very true...but is interesting nonetheless and prompts important reflection if there's a recurring theme? "

I think it warrants reflection yes. But I also think that work colleagues tend to confuse the job and the person.

It's easy to seem like a nice person when your job is handing out blankets to the homeless. But you would want a lawyer who had deep empathy with the other sides opinion would you!?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance

Is it a case of people not bothering to get to know the real you or you not allowing them to do so? What you say above makes me feel you'd come across as a little aloof & closed.

Not a judgment just an observation x

No I expect people to get me wrong to start with and am only to willing to show the real me. What I mentioned was people who judge me and can't be bothered finding out if it's true "

There's a very good book called the dynamic decision maker that provides a framework to explain why first impressions and ongoing interactions are usually so different. It's way better than that myers-briggs shite.

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By *iewMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn


"I am aloof and cold & the older I get, the more I become this way.

I have little time for faux hugs, kisses and other things that truly make me

This is others perception? You seem to be a live and let live sort in here.

yes, I used/use aloof to distance myself from people.

in my teens, I was badly bullied for being 'gay' and I used this method to get me through things... If I was subjected to people shouting names at me, I would focus on something ahead and blank them out....

and I still do this to a certain degree.

Do you sometimes find that you're shutting out everything, not just the negativity from people?

I think a little if I am honest.

I'm not a professional but live in the world not in your head. Those that matter come from surprisingly unexpected places and friendships.

I think you're one of the good guys from reading your posts. "

thank you very much.

I will be end up the strange man who lives alone in the cottage at the top of the glen , I am currently looking for a small cottage near to Glencoe. , it's beautiful here and I would be blissfully happy

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance

Is it a case of people not bothering to get to know the real you or you not allowing them to do so? What you say above makes me feel you'd come across as a little aloof & closed.

Not a judgment just an observation x

No I expect people to get me wrong to start with and am only to willing to show the real me. What I mentioned was people who judge me and can't be bothered finding out if it's true

There's a very good book called the dynamic decision maker that provides a framework to explain why first impressions and ongoing interactions are usually so different. It's way better than that myers-briggs shite."

The who what when ??? Never read a book in my life it give me a huge headache concentrating so hard

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I am aloof and cold & the older I get, the more I become this way.

I have little time for faux hugs, kisses and other things that truly make me

This is others perception? You seem to be a live and let live sort in here.

yes, I used/use aloof to distance myself from people.

in my teens, I was badly bullied for being 'gay' and I used this method to get me through things... If I was subjected to people shouting names at me, I would focus on something ahead and blank them out....

and I still do this to a certain degree.

Do you sometimes find that you're shutting out everything, not just the negativity from people?

I think a little if I am honest.

I'm not a professional but live in the world not in your head. Those that matter come from surprisingly unexpected places and friendships.

I think you're one of the good guys from reading your posts.

thank you very much.

I will be end up the strange man who lives alone in the cottage at the top of the glen , I am currently looking for a small cottage near to Glencoe. , it's beautiful here and I would be blissfully happy"

That sounds idyllic

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance

Is it a case of people not bothering to get to know the real you or you not allowing them to do so? What you say above makes me feel you'd come across as a little aloof & closed.

Not a judgment just an observation x

No I expect people to get me wrong to start with and am only to willing to show the real me. What I mentioned was people who judge me and can't be bothered finding out if it's true

There's a very good book called the dynamic decision maker that provides a framework to explain why first impressions and ongoing interactions are usually so different. It's way better than that myers-briggs shite.

The who what when ??? Never read a book in my life it give me a huge headache concentrating so hard "

You've never been given a personality test at work?

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By *ee VianteWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"I am aloof and cold & the older I get, the more I become this way.

I have little time for faux hugs, kisses and other things that truly make me

This is others perception? You seem to be a live and let live sort in here.

yes, I used/use aloof to distance myself from people.

in my teens, I was badly bullied for being 'gay' and I used this method to get me through things... If I was subjected to people shouting names at me, I would focus on something ahead and blank them out....

and I still do this to a certain degree.

Do you sometimes find that you're shutting out everything, not just the negativity from people?

I think a little if I am honest.

I'm not a professional but live in the world not in your head. Those that matter come from surprisingly unexpected places and friendships.

I think you're one of the good guys from reading your posts.

thank you very much.

I will be end up the strange man who lives alone in the cottage at the top of the glen , I am currently looking for a small cottage near to Glencoe. , it's beautiful here and I would be blissfully happy"

I reckon you've got to be a secret serial killer psychopath. Nobody can be as calm and balanced all the time. It's a façade. It has to be!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm told on a daily basis that everyone I work with hates me. Perception not needed, i know I'm a cunt

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm told on a daily basis that everyone I work with hates me. Perception not needed, i know I'm a cunt "

But is being a cunt a good or a bad thing in the context of your job? It's not good for the company is everyone there is a touchy feely tree hugger.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm told on a daily basis that everyone I work with hates me. Perception not needed, i know I'm a cunt

But is being a cunt a good or a bad thing in the context of your job? It's not good for the company is everyone there is a touchy feely tree hugger. "

It's neither here nor there to the job.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm told on a daily basis that everyone I work with hates me. Perception not needed, i know I'm a cunt

But is being a cunt a good or a bad thing in the context of your job? It's not good for the company is everyone there is a touchy feely tree hugger.

It's neither here nor there to the job."

I like to think that being a cunt is beneficial to my job but that could be a defence mechanism. I don't really care if it is or not. Which is probably what a cunt would say...

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By *iamondjoeMan  over a year ago

Glastonbury

As Oscar Wilde said:

"Be yourself. Everyone else is taken."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

That I'm nice and friendly

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As Oscar Wilde said:

"Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.""

It's my own fault. If i talked about football, soap opera, modifying cars, going to the gym, and the latest iphone then i wouldn't be considered "werid".

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/01/16 12:59:45]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We've done this at work a few times, people always think I am more confident than I actually am, funny, caring and feisty come up a lot!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As Oscar Wilde said:

"Be yourself. Everyone else is taken."

It's my own fault. If i talked about football, soap opera, modifying cars, going to the gym, and the latest iphone then i wouldn't be considered "werid"."

It's hard being friends with nerds who go silent at the mention of women and boobies. How can men bond if we can't talk about tits?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As Oscar Wilde said:

"Be yourself. Everyone else is taken."

It's my own fault. If i talked about football, soap opera, modifying cars, going to the gym, and the latest iphone then i wouldn't be considered "werid"."

You'd fit in well at my work then. I'm sure it's part of the job description that you have to be weird to work there

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"Am I bovver'd?

Think what you like of me

Yes I agree to some extent,but I think it's important to reflect on others opinions at times. Are we not a little self obsessed if we care little and ponder why they have such opinions?

No I agree with Joe I don't give a shit what people think of me. I am who I am and if you can't be bothered to get to no the real me then I can't be bothered changing your _iew of me. The people who no me reap the rewards of knowing me the rest I've no time for as they're of no importance

Is it a case of people not bothering to get to know the real you or you not allowing them to do so? What you say above makes me feel you'd come across as a little aloof & closed.

Not a judgment just an observation x

No I expect people to get me wrong to start with and am only to willing to show the real me. What I mentioned was people who judge me and can't be bothered finding out if it's true

There's a very good book called the dynamic decision maker that provides a framework to explain why first impressions and ongoing interactions are usually so different. It's way better than that myers-briggs shite.

The who what when ??? Never read a book in my life it give me a huge headache concentrating so hard

You've never been given a personality test at work? "

No. Most of my bosses steer well clear of me but as I've been there 18 years I no my job and there's better than most of them. It's quite amusing really

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By *iamondjoeMan  over a year ago

Glastonbury


"As Oscar Wilde said:

"Be yourself. Everyone else is taken."

It's my own fault. If i talked about football, soap opera, modifying cars, going to the gym, and the latest iphone then i wouldn't be considered "werid"."

Let us retire to the drawing room, drink brandy, smoke cigars and talk of the empire.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

On here there is only one person who knows me , the real me.Tbh I am the same mindset though as D J and Mr FB..im not really bothered what people here think of me. I am who I am and not about to change for anyone. If people want to get to know me and find oot for themselves then they are welcome to many have been surprised

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As Oscar Wilde said:

"Be yourself. Everyone else is taken."

It's my own fault. If i talked about football, soap opera, modifying cars, going to the gym, and the latest iphone then i wouldn't be considered "werid".

Let us retire to the drawing room, drink brandy, smoke cigars and talk of the empire. "

This sounds ideal.

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"On here there is only one person who knows me , the real me.Tbh I am the same mindset though as D J and Mr FB..im not really bothered what people here think of me. I am who I am and not about to change for anyone. If people want to get to know me and find oot for themselves then they are welcome to many have been surprised "

Ohhhh we have your card marked alright

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"As Oscar Wilde said:

"Be yourself. Everyone else is taken."

It's my own fault. If i talked about football, soap opera, modifying cars, going to the gym, and the latest iphone then i wouldn't be considered "werid".

Let us retire to the drawing room, drink brandy, smoke cigars and talk of the empire. "

One would withdraw to the withdrawing room....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

That I know what I'm doing most of the time but I'm just winging it usually and people usually think I'm this confident woman, when in truth I'm really not and I worry about everything

G x

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By *iewMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

whatever the perception, just strive to be the best you can be. Be at peace.

from that peace, comes happiness.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"On here there is only one person who knows me , the real me.Tbh I am the same mindset though as D J and Mr FB..im not really bothered what people here think of me. I am who I am and not about to change for anyone. If people want to get to know me and find oot for themselves then they are welcome to many have been surprised

Ohhhh we have your card marked alright "

Told you....you don't know the half

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By *olgateMan  over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Many people have the wrong perception of me, some of its my fault, some of it is theirs. In the great scheme of life does it matter that much? Not really.

C...

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By *oward1978Man  over a year ago

Rotherham

I think people think I'm a little unusual. I evidently come across as a little unusual. And to be fair they're probably right. I'm not your usual kind of guy.

I'm usually very quiet. I don't talk unless I feel I've got something to say. What a lot of people seem to find interesting I find mindnumbingly tedious. This makes me seem very switched off to things. This probably makes people think I'm a bit aloof or a bit dumb or maybe that I don't really care. The problem is I probably care too much. Inside my brain's normally working overtime. I'm actually the most loving guy you'll ever meet but the signals I give off appear to be the exact opposite of what I actually am inside. My inability to express myself makes for a very lonely existence.

It's no coincidence that I've had more people show an interest in me on here in the last six months than I've had in my previous 37 years on this planet. It's because I have the space and the time to express myself on here without the interruptions. I can articulate on here. Face to face I must be giving off this weird vibe. So all in all I think people just think I'm that "odd guy" who sits alone in the corner because that's what he likes to do, we'll leave him to it, when in fact I'm not like that at all.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I know how I come across ie. Moody at times

But anyone who knows me properly knows that's not the case all the time

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No idea.

Probably fairly flippant.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" The voices thread made me think of an exercise in work I once did. Participants anonymously wrote opinions of a peer,then you got to read them.

I was mortified to read that I was intimidating and confident and appeared aloof

What do people make of you that you think is wrong?"

Guys especially think because I'm only small they will break me if when tell him I'm a though little 1. X

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"That I'm cold. I don't really do hugs, crying at weddings etc., gushing OTT displays of affection or friendship. But I'm not aloof or cold, I'm just more introverted and reserved than most people seem to be. I still feel things deeply.

I'm exactly like this!

Except that I am cold. I think people keep thinking they will see a warmer side to me, but there isn't one.

-Courtney "

You're not cold! You're very friendly and funny. I found you. Very easy to talk to.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I get the impression that people find me a little weird. Not in a bad 'keep away from the crazy lady' sort of weird, but a little unusual.

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By *oward1978Man  over a year ago

Rotherham


"I get the impression that people find me a little weird. Not in a bad 'keep away from the crazy lady' sort of weird, but a little unusual."

That sounds like me. I've always been the odd one. Glad I'm not the only one who thinks like that.

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By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

People's perception of me would depend very much on the context. Professionally I am seen as a perfectionist and very demanding. At a dance I am seen as the life and soul - my dj friend says I am 'worth 10 ordinary people!' when I come to his dances lol!

But because I am very logical and can communicate precisely and dispassionately online, people probably don't realise how warm and affectionate I am in person.

I've had some fabulous compliments from one or two folk on here who have perceived some deep aspect of my character though, and that is very gratifying, I treasure those words.

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By *ENDAROOSCouple  over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

That I'm distant / cold and dont always look approachable.

I don't mean to give off these vibes, I'm just naturally reserved / shy in large groups or with new people until I feel comfortable.

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By *aucy tiggerWoman  over a year ago

Back where I belong


"That I am confident. I'm really quite shy but I will talk to anyone about anything. Red "

I'm the same, cool and confident on the outside and a quivering wreck on the inside - I've just become an expert in covering it up with bullshit lol xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"That I am confident. I'm really quite shy but I will talk to anyone about anything. Red

I'm the same, cool and confident on the outside and a quivering wreck on the inside - I've just become an expert in covering it up with bullshit lol xx"

Same with me, I cover mine up with bullshit and humour

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Those that think I'm a twat have probably got it about right and those that don't are easily duped

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