FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Playing the 'playing the race card' card
Playing the 'playing the race card' card
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I suggested on another topic that I feel slightly disadvantaged when using Fab because I'm Asian. A few others agreed.
I think it's fair to say that Asians are further down the list whenever racial preferences are mentioned, compared to white or black people.
A few people were VERY quick to say I was playing the victim and playing the race card. I wasn't.
When I say Asian, I'm simply talking about physical appearance. Let's face it, when profiles mention racial preferences they're talking about attraction and not really thinking about culture, traditions or religion!
Other topics in the forum talk about feeling disadvantaged due to being too tall or short... why is it acceptable to discuss height (physical appearance) and why was I made to sound like a victim when discussing being Asian (physical appearance)?
Some people need to think carefully before making bold accusations like playing the race/victim card because maybe people are just stating that something that is likely to be a valid point. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I suggested on another topic that I feel slightly disadvantaged when using Fab because I'm Asian. A few others agreed.
I think it's fair to say that Asians are further down the list whenever racial preferences are mentioned, compared to white or black people.
A few people were VERY quick to say I was playing the victim and playing the race card. I wasn't.
When I say Asian, I'm simply talking about physical appearance. Let's face it, when profiles mention racial preferences they're talking about attraction and not really thinking about culture, traditions or religion!
Other topics in the forum talk about feeling disadvantaged due to being too tall or short... why is it acceptable to discuss height (physical appearance) and why was I made to sound like a victim when discussing being Asian (physical appearance)?
Some people need to think carefully before making bold accusations like playing the race/victim card because maybe people are just stating that something that is likely to be a valid point."
Who's list are you referring to???
We don't meet black, Asians, extremely over weight, hairy or people with false teeth or no pulse. X
Everyones list is different. We don't find anything sexy or attractive bout these sort of people x but will happily sit, chat and have a social with them x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I suggested on another topic that I feel slightly disadvantaged when using Fab because I'm Asian. A few others agreed.
I think it's fair to say that Asians are further down the list whenever racial preferences are mentioned, compared to white or black people.
A few people were VERY quick to say I was playing the victim and playing the race card. I wasn't.
When I say Asian, I'm simply talking about physical appearance. Let's face it, when profiles mention racial preferences they're talking about attraction and not really thinking about culture, traditions or religion!
Other topics in the forum talk about feeling disadvantaged due to being too tall or short... why is it acceptable to discuss height (physical appearance) and why was I made to sound like a victim when discussing being Asian (physical appearance)?
Some people need to think carefully before making bold accusations like playing the race/victim card because maybe people are just stating that something that is likely to be a valid point."
Well said  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I suggested on another topic that I feel slightly disadvantaged when using Fab because I'm Asian. A few others agreed.
I think it's fair to say that Asians are further down the list whenever racial preferences are mentioned, compared to white or black people.
A few people were VERY quick to say I was playing the victim and playing the race card. I wasn't.
When I say Asian, I'm simply talking about physical appearance. Let's face it, when profiles mention racial preferences they're talking about attraction and not really thinking about culture, traditions or religion!
Other topics in the forum talk about feeling disadvantaged due to being too tall or short... why is it acceptable to discuss height (physical appearance) and why was I made to sound like a victim when discussing being Asian (physical appearance)?
Some people need to think carefully before making bold accusations like playing the race/victim card because maybe people are just stating that something that is likely to be a valid point.
Who's list are you referring to???
We don't meet black, Asians, extremely over weight, hairy or people with false teeth or no pulse. X
Everyones list is different. We don't find anything sexy or attractive bout these sort of people x but will happily sit, chat and have a social with them x"
Whether people meet Asians wasn't his point. |
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"I suggested on another topic that I feel slightly disadvantaged when using Fab because I'm Asian. A few others agreed.
I think it's fair to say that Asians are further down the list whenever racial preferences are mentioned, compared to white or black people.
A few people were VERY quick to say I was playing the victim and playing the race card. I wasn't.
When I say Asian, I'm simply talking about physical appearance. Let's face it, when profiles mention racial preferences they're talking about attraction and not really thinking about culture, traditions or religion!
Other topics in the forum talk about feeling disadvantaged due to being too tall or short... why is it acceptable to discuss height (physical appearance) and why was I made to sound like a victim when discussing being Asian (physical appearance)?
Some people need to think carefully before making bold accusations like playing the race/victim card because maybe people are just stating that something that is likely to be a valid point."
You were pulled up on one thread for being a hypocrite, having on your profile (which you've now changed)a preference for white women because they were naughtier whilst bemoaning the preferences of others.
You'll also find threads started by married men, blacks, Asians, short, tattooed etc who tend to blame others for their lack of success do (tend) to play the victim.
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By *olgateMan
over a year ago
on the road to nowhere in particular |
"I thought this thread was going to be about Charlotte Rampling trying to trump the black race card with a white one!
Don't let a small vocal minority get to you OP.
Good luck
Mr ddc"
Charlotte Rampling wasn't quoted accurately
This site reflects society, there are racists on here. But there is a large amount of indignant types that see some kind of prejudice everywhere.
Pointing something out an observation does not necessarily make it a racist or prejudicial post |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I suggested on another topic that I feel slightly disadvantaged when using Fab because I'm Asian. A few others agreed.
I think it's fair to say that Asians are further down the list whenever racial preferences are mentioned, compared to white or black people.
A few people were VERY quick to say I was playing the victim and playing the race card. I wasn't.
When I say Asian, I'm simply talking about physical appearance. Let's face it, when profiles mention racial preferences they're talking about attraction and not really thinking about culture, traditions or religion!
Other topics in the forum talk about feeling disadvantaged due to being too tall or short... why is it acceptable to discuss height (physical appearance) and why was I made to sound like a victim when discussing being Asian (physical appearance)?
Some people need to think carefully before making bold accusations like playing the race/victim card because maybe people are just stating that something that is likely to be a valid point."
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"... a preference for white women because they were naughtier whilst bemoaning the preferences of others."
I said I didn't have a problem at all with others' preferences. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"I suggested on another topic that I feel slightly disadvantaged when using Fab because I'm Asian. A few others agreed.
I think it's fair to say that Asians are further down the list whenever racial preferences are mentioned, compared to white or black people.
A few people were VERY quick to say I was playing the victim and playing the race card. I wasn't.
When I say Asian, I'm simply talking about physical appearance. Let's face it, when profiles mention racial preferences they're talking about attraction and not really thinking about culture, traditions or religion!
Other topics in the forum talk about feeling disadvantaged due to being too tall or short... why is it acceptable to discuss height (physical appearance) and why was I made to sound like a victim when discussing being Asian (physical appearance)?
Some people need to think carefully before making bold accusations like playing the race/victim card because maybe people are just stating that something that is likely to be a valid point."
the problem is that "some" people will always find a way to complain about the things that exclude them.....
so be that tall, short, young, old, black, white, asian, straight, bi and so on.....
swinging isn't a service.... there is no such thing as equal ops.....
after all, even you as the OP must have certain preferences that you look for over others....... 
I think people are quick the make the complaint because it then leaves them blameless.... after all, thing outside their control... right?????
it might be a reason...... guessing it is not the only reason...... and if stars aligned and everything worked in your favour I doubt whether you would have made the some complaint/observation/whinge......
as i said.... swingers are not here to provide some sort of service for all and sundry..... and i think that once that piece of realism/pragmatism gets thru.... its one less thing people will get upset about..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I genuinely don't get racism.
How does somebody get upset about a 50,000 year evolutionary trait occurring from habitat  .
I don't get people who describe themselves as Asian? .
I mean that's about as descriptive as saying I'm male..
There's huge facial differences between Turkish and Korean let alone Korean and Japanese.
Personally I find Halle berry attractive... But I'm guessing she'll be a racist for knocking back this white guy when I ask her out?.
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The race/hate card is played all the time here.
If you don't like what someone says but have no answer logical repost roll out the 'your a racist/hater' reply, stifle a discussion and reduce the debate to name calling, works every time. If you make an advance towards someone and get a knock-back its not because your not what they are looking for or they don't fancy you, its because your the wrong colour or sexuality and they are racist or haters and hound them till they block you, report you to admin or leave the site. We all know it goes on every day.
And it seems to be happening more and more. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Who's list are you referring to???
Whoever mentions racial preferences in their profile."
Just use as a filter and move on... Focus your energy on people who do want to meet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My Asian friend said that women stop talking to him when he says he's Asian,even though they see pics of his face beforehand. Still not what the OP was on about but people knowing you're Asian will put them off. |
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"My Asian friend said that women stop talking to him when he says he's Asian,even though they see pics of his face beforehand. Still not what the OP was on about but people knowing you're Asian will put them off. "
If asked what I am my answer is British, I have never though of myself as a colour or race. Maybe the problem is that your friend and many others do not see themselves as British but identify themselves as a colour and race. |
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"I'm short and old, things I cannot alter, however I don't claim discrimination when I don't fit in with others preferences.
 "
I always imagine you as tall, isn't that funny. I also never think of you as old |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I suggested on another topic that I feel slightly disadvantaged when using Fab because I'm Asian. A few others agreed.
I think it's fair to say that Asians are further down the list whenever racial preferences are mentioned, compared to white or black people.
A few people were VERY quick to say I was playing the victim and playing the race card. I wasn't.
When I say Asian, I'm simply talking about physical appearance. Let's face it, when profiles mention racial preferences they're talking about attraction and not really thinking about culture, traditions or religion!
Other topics in the forum talk about feeling disadvantaged due to being too tall or short... why is it acceptable to discuss height (physical appearance) and why was I made to sound like a victim when discussing being Asian (physical appearance)?
Some people need to think carefully before making bold accusations like playing the race/victim card because maybe people are just stating that something that is likely to be a valid point."
Were you made to sound like a victim? Are you playing the race card? Culture, traditions and certainly religion are very important to many people. Are they of no significance to you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This just reads as "I'm allowed to say what I want but YOU need to think carefully before you say what you want". "
Agree.. like the latest forum "do you love black men" thats just appeared, does not offend me in any shape or form and let the preferences of those guys and girls shine.. but dare i start a forum asking "who loves white men", i would be burnt at the stake in no time.
I think if we just remove the sticks from our arses and stop blaming failed contact on race, looks, age, gender etc etc and accepted we arent to everyones taste itd be a lot more pleasant x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My Asian friend said that women stop talking to him when he says he's Asian,even though they see pics of his face beforehand. Still not what the OP was on about but people knowing you're Asian will put them off.
If asked what I am my answer is British, I have never though of myself as a colour or race. Maybe the problem is that your friend and many others do not see themselves as British but identify themselves as a colour and race."
Yes he does,it's other people who ask his ethnicity who see him as Asian. He's that British that he cooked us pork sausages that we ate in bed. If someone asks your ethnicity you wouldn't say British would you? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't get people who describe themselves as Asian?"
I don't like the term 'Asian' myself but it is commonly used to describe someone who isn't white, black, or Latin.
It's much better to describe oneself by country but of course it would be ridiculous for people to write their preferences by nationality! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My Asian friend said that women stop talking to him when he says he's Asian,even though they see pics of his face beforehand. Still not what the OP was on about but people knowing you're Asian will put them off.
If asked what I am my answer is British, I have never though of myself as a colour or race. Maybe the problem is that your friend and many others do not see themselves as British but identify themselves as a colour and race.
Yes he does,it's other people who ask his ethnicity who see him as Asian. He's that British that he cooked us pork sausages that we ate in bed. If someone asks your ethnicity you wouldn't say British would you? "
desribing ir asian is more like saying ur european |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are people on this site who I think with the way they describe what they want on their profiles are racist. Others who may ultimately be looking for or not looking for the same thing, but express it in a rational way, most likely are not.
There are (in my opinion) some very ugly prejudices masquerading as preferences on this site, the problem is that when you point this out everyone takes the hump and thinks they're being called a racist, so it never really gets anywhere. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My Asian friend said that women stop talking to him when he says he's Asian,even though they see pics of his face beforehand. Still not what the OP was on about but people knowing you're Asian will put them off.
If asked what I am my answer is British, I have never though of myself as a colour or race. Maybe the problem is that your friend and many others do not see themselves as British but identify themselves as a colour and race.
Yes he does,it's other people who ask his ethnicity who see him as Asian. He's that British that he cooked us pork sausages that we ate in bed. If someone asks your ethnicity you wouldn't say British would you? "
Yes. I am British. And? |
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By *oinMan
over a year ago
wolverhampton |
"I suggested on another topic that I feel slightly disadvantaged when using Fab because I'm Asian. A few others agreed.
I think it's fair to say that Asians are further down the list whenever racial preferences are mentioned, compared to white or black people.
A few people were VERY quick to say I was playing the victim and playing the race card. I wasn't.
When I say Asian, I'm simply talking about physical appearance. Let's face it, when profiles mention racial preferences they're talking about attraction and not really thinking about culture, traditions or religion!
Other topics in the forum talk about feeling disadvantaged due to being too tall or short... why is it acceptable to discuss height (physical appearance) and why was I made to sound like a victim when discussing being Asian (physical appearance)?
Some people need to think carefully before making bold accusations like playing the race/victim card because maybe people are just stating that something that is likely to be a valid point.
Who's list are you referring to???
We don't meet black, Asians, extremely over weight, hairy or people with false teeth or no pulse. X
Everyones list is different. We don't find anything sexy or attractive bout these sort of people x but will happily sit, chat and have a social with them x"
THESE SORT OF PEOPLE 
WOW |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My Asian friend said that women stop talking to him when he says he's Asian,even though they see pics of his face beforehand. Still not what the OP was on about but people knowing you're Asian will put them off.
If asked what I am my answer is British, I have never though of myself as a colour or race. Maybe the problem is that your friend and many others do not see themselves as British but identify themselves as a colour and race.
Yes he does,it's other people who ask his ethnicity who see him as Asian. He's that British that he cooked us pork sausages that we ate in bed. If someone asks your ethnicity you wouldn't say British would you?
Yes. I am British. And?"
And nothing. He's British Asian. It's the Asian part that puts women off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't get people who describe themselves as Asian?
I don't like the term 'Asian' myself but it is commonly used to describe someone who isn't white, black, or Latin.
It's much better to describe oneself by country but of course it would be ridiculous for people to write their preferences by nationality!"
.
You see I think what your describing is cultural differences that's generalised by skin colour?.
I don't like Asians... Could transpire to I don't like Muslims.
I don't like black people means they don't like gangster wrap, they don't actually like Eminem either..
People get very funny about cultural differences, because in reality this tends to divide more than somebody's skin colour, although I no doubt there are plain stupid people, who just go all fuzzy when faced with anything out of the norm, I don't think that's the large minority but like I said the large minority are separated by culture must easier!.
Sometimes this is born out of real differences and other times just through laziness of not wanting to mix |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My Asian friend said that women stop talking to him when he says he's Asian,even though they see pics of his face beforehand. Still not what the OP was on about but people knowing you're Asian will put them off.
If asked what I am my answer is British, I have never though of myself as a colour or race. Maybe the problem is that your friend and many others do not see themselves as British but identify themselves as a colour and race.
Yes he does,it's other people who ask his ethnicity who see him as Asian. He's that British that he cooked us pork sausages that we ate in bed. If someone asks your ethnicity you wouldn't say British would you?
Yes. I am British. And?
And nothing. He's British Asian. It's the Asian part that puts women off. "
I guess he is British, too, though having not met him I don't know. I couldn't give a toss about the colour of his skin. Attitude and personality are more important to me. |
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I am a white woman who has fucked/dated Asian men - I love men of colour, I would not do it again. The reason, they tended to be racist and disrespectful towards white women wanting to do to us what they would never do to Asian women. Black and white guys only for me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My Asian friend said that women stop talking to him when he says he's Asian,even though they see pics of his face beforehand. Still not what the OP was on about but people knowing you're Asian will put them off.
If asked what I am my answer is British, I have never though of myself as a colour or race. Maybe the problem is that your friend and many others do not see themselves as British but identify themselves as a colour and race.
Yes he does,it's other people who ask his ethnicity who see him as Asian. He's that British that he cooked us pork sausages that we ate in bed. If someone asks your ethnicity you wouldn't say British would you?
Yes. I am British. And?
And nothing. He's British Asian. It's the Asian part that puts women off.
I guess he is British, too, though having not met him I don't know. I couldn't give a toss about the colour of his skin. Attitude and personality are more important to me."
They didn't give a toss about his skin colour when they thought he wasn't Asian. It's obvious from his photos he isn't white  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am a white woman who has fucked/dated Asian men - I love men of colour, I would not do it again. The reason, they tended to be racist and disrespectful towards white women wanting to do to us what they would never do to Asian women. Black and white guys only for me."
It's a shame you experienced that - were they from a particular region of Asia? If so, I wouldn't dismiss an entire continent of men based on that...
It's like me saying: 'a French (random choice) lady was racist to me therefore I'll avoid all Europeans.' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am a white woman who has fucked/dated Asian men - I love men of colour, I would not do it again. The reason, they tended to be racist and disrespectful towards white women wanting to do to us what they would never do to Asian women. Black and white guys only for me.
It's a shame you experienced that - were they from a particular region of Asia? If so, I wouldn't dismiss an entire continent of men based on that...
It's like me saying: 'a French (random choice) lady was racist to me therefore I'll avoid all Europeans.'"
out of curiosity which part of asia are u from ? |
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"My Asian friend said that women stop talking to him when he says he's Asian,even though they see pics of his face beforehand. Still not what the OP was on about but people knowing you're Asian will put them off.
If asked what I am my answer is British, I have never though of myself as a colour or race. Maybe the problem is that your friend and many others do not see themselves as British but identify themselves as a colour and race.
Yes he does,it's other people who ask his ethnicity who see him as Asian. He's that British that he cooked us pork sausages that we ate in bed. If someone asks your ethnicity you wouldn't say British would you? "
To be absolutely honest if someone asked me that I would tell them that I did not want to know them and to fuck off! In fact whenever I fill out forms that ask me to describe my sexuality, religion and ethnic origins I blank the whole thing out and add a proforma letter I have that I enclose with the form asking why they are asking for information that could be used to persecute me or anyone else that answers their questions. It (my letter) goes on to point out that the NAZIs used information collected in this manner to identify Jews, Jehovah's Witnesses and others that they then sent to the death camps. Most of the time my letter gets ignored, however every now and then I get a reply that effectively tells me not to bother my little head because something like that cant happen in Briton today. |
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