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Fab dating
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So I've been chatting to a guy for quite some time and the subject of dating has come up, he has said that whilst the women on fab are great to sleep with he would in no way consider dating one properly even if he met the woman of his dreams... I just wondered if that was an option shared by any others here??? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah. Marc's not gunna stick with me either. Says he wants a "laaaddyyy" and ladies don't ask him for threesomes on valentines day. Ppffttt.
-Courtney "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I've been chatting to a guy for quite some time and the subject of dating has come up, he has said that whilst the women on fab are great to sleep with he would in no way consider dating one properly even if he met the woman of his dreams... I just wondered if that was an option shared by any others here???"
I'd say he is possibly insecure about himself. But definitely sees the women on fab as 'lesser' people. 
In other news, I am dating someone I met off here and am very happy.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This attitude really pisses me off!
I would be interested if it's mostly a male attitude or evenly spread across the sexes?
It smacks of men wanting a virgin type to date/meet mother and a slut in the bedroom!  |
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Quite a lot of guys think like that and quite a lot of women as well. So maybe they should get together and not date each other.
Seriously, I'm not here to "date" but if a guy said that to me he can sling his hook I'm not here to be thought of as second rate.
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By *ilacWoman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
I suppose if he wants a vanilla relationship with someone that's not a swinger, he wouldn't date a swinger from Fab.
I won't date vanilla men and will only date from the swinging or fetish scene so there is no point in me looking elsewhere.
I guess it's what suits individuals. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yeah it's some women too - not just men.
But when they've met and married this epitome of virtue - I wonder how long it'll be before they're bored with their sex life and back on here looking for 'discreet' meets?  |
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"Not at all ... At least if you meet then date from here you have things in common! Share an interest ?
Read what he said again.  "
I did thanks and as I said dating from here could be a good idea therefore he's an idiot .. Maybe you should read what I said |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the complete opposite _iew, dating someone from Fabs would be great! Similar outlook on sex, and all that."
But I would like it to be 1 on 1 for awhile, Spending some time together maybe a few holidays etc while we get to know each other before including other people in the relationship |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've know couples who have met off here as singles and gotten together, one of my best friends met her now husband on fab, definitely not a _iew shared by them or myself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the complete opposite _iew, dating someone from Fabs would be great! Similar outlook on sex, and all that.
But I would like it to be 1 on 1 for awhile, Spending some time together maybe a few holidays etc while we get to know each other before including other people in the relationship "
Yeah agreed! If I met someone I thought might be permanent I'd want to take some time off to get to know each other - then come back with a couple profile if they're happy to continue swinging! Xx |
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I met a lady in real life. We did stuff together and things were progressing beautifully. I told her of my extra curricular activities but did not mention the word "fab" nor "swinging". I even showed her "proof"
Then I saw her profile on here. I came out of the "closet" and then she flipped.
Things have never been the same again. We are still both on here and we are still in touch.
If you ask me a direct question, I'd say not a good idea to date someone from on here. Better to step away and get one from elsewhere who might not be so innocent anyway.
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For me, it would be perfect to meet someone from here and have a r/ship with. I agree take a bit of time of to get to know one another better and come back with a couples profile.
My experience dating women outside of the swingers world soon gets boring.
Saying all of that I am also realistic, its hard enough to get a meet here, so finding a life partner is even less likely |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I met a lady in real life. We did stuff together and things were progressing beautifully. I told her of my extra curricular activities but did not mention the word "fab" nor "swinging". I even showed her "proof"
Then I saw her profile on here. I came out of the "closet" and then she flipped.
Things have never been the same again. We are still both on here and we are still in touch.
If you ask me a direct question, I'd say not a good idea to date someone from on here. Better to step away and get one from elsewhere who might not be so innocent anyway.
"
difference is you met her out of fab and although you told her she never told you - |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Perhaps he didn't phrase it properly.
I wouldn't be able to date someone that I used to fuck casually. The transition just wouldn't work for me.
I am, however, dating someone I met from here. It was decided before meeting that we'd like it to be more than just a fuck. That established difference is what was needed for me to see him differently. |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
I have heard this so many times! Just goes to show their double standards and I drop them as fast as possible.
Men with that attitude just proves the type of person they are to be honest so in a way I am grateful. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah it's some women too - not just men.
But when they've met and married this epitome of virtue - I wonder how long it'll be before they're bored with their sex life and back on here looking for 'discreet' meets? "
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It's the typical Madonna/Whore syndrome men have - fuck the bad girl , date and marry the good girl who keeps her legs closed . No matter what women do,they're damned if they do and damned if they don't. Even in this liberated age of women,most men will still have that deep rooted thing going on in their head . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's the typical Madonna/Whore syndrome men have - fuck the bad girl , date and marry the good girl who keeps her legs closed . No matter what women do,they're damned if they do and damned if they don't. Even in this liberated age of women,most men will still have that deep rooted thing going on in their head . "
I don't feel "damned if I do, damned if I don't" just because some people disapprove of promiscuity. I still have the choice in if I let silly things bother me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Goes back to a statement I made a week or so ago 
Overheard two guys in the sauna at a club talking about their conquests in a swingers club, and also girls they would take to a club. But they would never take their girlfriends to a swingers club |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't care where I met my future boyfriend, if I met him off here though his profile would be gone unless he just wanted to use the forums. He'd have to have all message filters on and I'd have to have access to his account. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I've been chatting to a guy for quite some time and the subject of dating has come up, he has said that whilst the women on fab are great to sleep with he would in no way consider dating one properly even if he met the woman of his dreams... I just wondered if that was an option shared by any others here???
I'd say he is possibly insecure about himself. But definitely sees the women on fab as 'lesser' people.
In other news, I am dating someone I met off here and am very happy. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't care where I met my future boyfriend, if I met him off here though his profile would be gone unless he just wanted to use the forums. He'd have to have all message filters on and I'd have to have access to his account. "
And would you do the same for him ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't care where I met my future boyfriend, if I met him off here though his profile would be gone unless he just wanted to use the forums. He'd have to have all message filters on and I'd have to have access to his account.
And would you do the same for him ?"
Yeah, my message filters are on constantly anyway, I do my own searching but obviously wouldn't search for fucks if I had a boyfriend. If he wanted my log in details to check that would be fine with me. Doubt many guys would want to check though, that's just a me thing cos I'm paranoid as hell. |
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"I wouldn't care where I met my future boyfriend, if I met him off here though his profile would be gone unless he just wanted to use the forums. He'd have to have all message filters on and I'd have to have access to his account. "
We met on here and we both still have our single accounts. Neither have access to the other, because we aren't that bothered as we trust each other. If there is no trust, there is no relationship in my book. We discuss everything and anything, and it was like this as soon as we met because we got on so well and had so many things in common ... I don't think I would feel the same about someone I haven't met on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Goes back to a statement I made a week or so ago
Overheard two guys in the sauna at a club talking about their conquests in a swingers club, and also girls they would take to a club. But they would never take their girlfriends to a swingers club "
Some singles on here basically use it as a cheaper alternative to prostitution. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Goes back to a statement I made a week or so ago
Overheard two guys in the sauna at a club talking about their conquests in a swingers club, and also girls they would take to a club. But they would never take their girlfriends to a swingers club
Some singles on here basically use it as a cheaper alternative to prostitution."
Same as some couples do. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Goes back to a statement I made a week or so ago
Overheard two guys in the sauna at a club talking about their conquests in a swingers club, and also girls they would take to a club. But they would never take their girlfriends to a swingers club
Some singles on here basically use it as a cheaper alternative to prostitution.
Same as some couples do. "
Ummm how exactly would that work? |
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More fool him. I for one am girlfriend material, I would be quite happy to walk away from fab forever if I started a full time relationship and I know many, many people on here feel the same. I take loyalty to an art form lol!   |
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"Goes back to a statement I made a week or so ago
Overheard two guys in the sauna at a club talking about their conquests in a swingers club, and also girls they would take to a club. But they would never take their girlfriends to a swingers club
Some singles on here basically use it as a cheaper alternative to prostitution.
Same as some couples do.
Ummm how exactly would that work? "
Meet a single person from here just for sex, rather than pay for someone is my guess  |
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My personal _iews on dating from Fab is that it is a good idea because so many relationships fail or are crap because of differences in sexual appetite.
At least with Fab you've got that bit covered |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have dated off here as I'm more relaxed around those who share a similar interest. However in a relationship I'm loyal and dedicated.
My ex probably had similar _iews, expected me to trust him but never trusted me. He was ok to chat to couples he classed as friends but would sulk if I did.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Goes back to a statement I made a week or so ago
Overheard two guys in the sauna at a club talking about their conquests in a swingers club, and also girls they would take to a club. But they would never take their girlfriends to a swingers club
Some singles on here basically use it as a cheaper alternative to prostitution.
Same as some couples do.
Ummm how exactly would that work?
Meet a single person from here just for sex, rather than pay for someone is my guess "
When I say a single uses this site as a cheaper alternative to prostitution then I'm saying that they are just desperate for sex and don't respect the person they fuck. I don't see how a couple could really be desperate for sex since they could always fuck each other. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah it's some women too - not just men.
But when they've met and married this epitome of virtue - I wonder how long it'll be before they're bored with their sex life and back on here looking for 'discreet' meets? "
good valid point |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I met my boyfriend through Miss Cheeky's dating thread and I couldn't be happier.
I struggle to respect people who have a problem with a prospective partner's sexual habits/history while indulging in similar activities themselves. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the complete opposite _iew, dating someone from Fabs would be great! Similar outlook on sex, and all that.
But I would like it to be 1 on 1 for awhile, Spending some time together maybe a few holidays etc while we get to know each other before including other people in the relationship "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I met someone from here who was special enough to me, I'd only a relationship if we both left Fab & left the life style too. Possibly hypocritical, but hey ho. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I really don't get that attitude.
I'd have no issue if I liked the person on an emotional and sexual level having an relationship. If anything all the awkward what are you into questions are answered and you both know each others likes and desires.
It's all about trust...everyone has a past and if you trust them and love them who gives a monkeys how you met.
Just tell your family Pof though  |
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By *assie48Woman
over a year ago
Stoke-on-Trent |
I think it can be seen both ways Yes u have shared interests but wot quite often happens wen things get serious could they see their partner enjoying intimate things with a member of the opposite sex or even same sex people standards change wen emotions are involved |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've dated two women from Fab.
The first was an absolute basket case (and no longer a site user).
The second is my current girlfriend and the most amazing person I've ever met.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I met someone from here who was special enough to me, I'd only a relationship if we both left Fab & left the life style too. Possibly hypocritical, but hey ho."
I'd only WANT a relationship, even. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Really don't think I can do relationship any more "
Honestly mate, I was exactly the same. Within ten minutes of meeting Nell though, I knew I was wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't understand why anybody would see that as a problem. I keep an open mind when it comes to relationships. Although I'm not actively seeking it, I won't rule it out, even whilst using fab. From the responses I've read, it is probably the best attitude to have with relationships, as it could happen anywhere. |
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Let's face it. It's complicated!
This lifestyle brings people from all different walks of life with their own interpretations of relationships and sex. Sometimes they don't match and sometimes they do. It's not a case of double standards or being good enough. it's a case of falling for someone and they don't feel as strongly as you or you're not what they want long-term.
I'm not saying relationships are not possible on fabs but remember some people are not looking for that and have no interest.
Also, be honest with yourself. If you're interested in a relationship, pursue it. Don't expect it to fall into place because you're shagging! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I suppose if he wants a vanilla relationship with someone that's not a swinger, he wouldn't date a swinger from Fab.
I won't date vanilla men and will only date from the swinging or fetish scene so there is no point in me looking elsewhere.
I guess it's what suits individuals. "
I agree |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the complete opposite _iew, dating someone from Fabs would be great! Similar outlook on sex, and all that.
But I would like it to be 1 on 1 for awhile, Spending some time together maybe a few holidays etc while we get to know each other before including other people in the relationship "
Totally agree with this xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I've been chatting to a guy for quite some time and the subject of dating has come up, he has said that whilst the women on fab are great to sleep with he would in no way consider dating one properly even if he met the woman of his dreams... I just wondered if that was an option shared by any others here???"
Yeah right. Like either sex has any choice when love comes knocking. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm not looking for a relationship, but, if I was I wouldn't be looking in the vanilla world, I like women who are opinionated, intelligent and value freedom to express themselves sexually, and I find from my previous experience when I was looking for a vanilla relationship, that there are mire women if my "type" in the swinging and bdsm community, than in the vanilla dating world
I love to.have sex, its like a hobby, and meeting a woman with the same _iew would be the ideal, I mean, if its not acceptable to ask a new partner to give up golf, why would it be acceptable to ask them to give up threesomes or safe anonymous sex with strangers?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I've been chatting to a guy for quite some time and the subject of dating has come up, he has said that whilst the women on fab are great to sleep with he would in no way consider dating one properly even if he met the woman of his dreams... I just wondered if that was an option shared by any others here???"
Would you date someone from Fab OP? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Surely using fab to find people for sex is no worse than going to clubs or bars and meeting people there? Is the assumption then that people who use fab are somehow undesireable when compared to those who use 'vanilla' dating sites or just hit the local towns and pick people up in bars? It shows ignorance and a lack of understanding to assume fabbers are somehow moraly inferior. |
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"Really don't think I can do relationship any more
You will know when you have met the right person "
So many times I've thought at last this is my 1 only for everything to turn to shit yet again. It's so easy to see what's right or wrong for anybody else but so hard for yourself and that's why I say I just don't think I can do it anymore |
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"Surely using fab to find people for sex is no worse than going to clubs or bars and meeting people there? Is the assumption then that people who use fab are somehow undesireable when compared to those who use 'vanilla' dating sites or just hit the local towns and pick people up in bars? It shows ignorance and a lack of understanding to assume fabbers are somehow moraly inferior."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Surely using fab to find people for sex is no worse than going to clubs or bars and meeting people there? Is the assumption then that people who use fab are somehow undesireable when compared to those who use 'vanilla' dating sites or just hit the local towns and pick people up in bars? It shows ignorance and a lack of understanding to assume fabbers are somehow moraly inferior."
It shows ignorance and a lack of understanding to assume that is why people won't date someone from Fab. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Really don't think I can do relationship any more
You will know when you have met the right person
So many times I've thought at last this is my 1 only for everything to turn to shit yet again. It's so easy to see what's right or wrong for anybody else but so hard for yourself and that's why I say I just don't think I can do it anymore "
I hear what you're saying but trust me, it happens. |
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By *llebWoman
over a year ago
Poulton Le Fylde |
"Yeah it's some women too - not just men.
But when they've met and married this epitome of virtue - I wonder how long it'll be before they're bored with their sex life and back on here looking for 'discreet' meets? "
And this is exactly the reason I would never form an emotional attachment to anyone on here
How long before the withdrawal symptoms or they have a bit of time to kill so rejoin for a look see! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Surely using fab to find people for sex is no worse than going to clubs or bars and meeting people there? Is the assumption then that people who use fab are somehow undesireable when compared to those who use 'vanilla' dating sites or just hit the local towns and pick people up in bars? It shows ignorance and a lack of understanding to assume fabbers are somehow moraly inferior."
Damn straight!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I've been chatting to a guy for quite some time and the subject of dating has come up, he has said that whilst the women on fab are great to sleep with he would in no way consider dating one properly even if he met the woman of his dreams... I just wondered if that was an option shared by any others here???"
I think the explanation given was a polite round-a-bout way of saying he doesnt fancy you.
I dont share the above sentiments, I would be happy to date (as in BF/GF) someone I met on Fab. |
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"Really don't think I can do relationship any more
You will know when you have met the right person
So many times I've thought at last this is my 1 only for everything to turn to shit yet again. It's so easy to see what's right or wrong for anybody else but so hard for yourself and that's why I say I just don't think I can do it anymore
I hear what you're saying but trust me, it happens."
Don't take this as knocking you I trust you know me better but I sincerely hope your still of the same mind in 12 months time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I've been chatting to a guy for quite some time and the subject of dating has come up, he has said that whilst the women on fab are great to sleep with he would in no way consider dating one properly even if he met the woman of his dreams... I just wondered if that was an option shared by any others here???"
But tricky this 1. If she is a gangbang queen with 100's of veris I would say 'what happens of Fab stays on Fab' if I'm being honest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Really don't think I can do relationship any more
Honestly mate, I was exactly the same. Within ten minutes of meeting Nell though, I knew I was wrong."
A www! How lovely!! Now I want one!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I've been chatting to a guy for quite some time and the subject of dating has come up, he has said that whilst the women on fab are great to sleep with he would in no way consider dating one properly even if he met the woman of his dreams... I just wondered if that was an option shared by any others here???"
sounds like a excuse to me bin him off ! He's prob married or something !
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Isn't the opposite the worst? Take an arranged marriage where you become committed to your partner with no idea what the chemistry will be like and whether you are remotely compatible in bed.
Is it not better to know all this before you commit? |
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By *anklerMan
over a year ago
Suffolk |
I don't see what the problem would be. I'd happily date someone I met from here. Not a problem at all.
People could meet someone from here and just click, same as they could meet someone anywhere and just click. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would definitely date a lady off here but when the subject did come up would need to do a lot of talking about like do we leave it behind or go forward together |
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Dating ? What is that ??? Ha ha
I am brutally honest person and say as it is and put cards on the table .
How to say a vanilla man : " Listen I am cute and nice but I do have another side too. I am and have been a Femdom for years but don't want to date submissive men but vanilla or alphas !"
Or how do I say that even my vanilla side is kinky as I like kinky sex , breastfeeding , biting and being bitten and much more .
So I keep myself for myself and don't date as even guys from fab are frightened of me . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would definitely date a lady off here but when the subject did come up would need to do a lot of talking about like do we leave it behind or go forward together "
Yeah I'm not sure how easy it would be to intergrate two single swingers into one couple, conversations would need to be had for sure, I mean would you swing as a couple only or would one of you start missing the single aspect of it, I suppose it could get complicated. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I suppose if he wants a vanilla relationship with someone that's not a swinger, he wouldn't date a swinger from Fab.
I won't date vanilla men and will only date from the swinging or fetish scene so there is no point in me looking elsewhere.
I guess it's what suits individuals. "
I think I know where you are coming from. I have made a couple of half hearted attempts at dating but it didn't feel right for me. As someone into both the swinging and fetish lifestyle it dawned on me that most vanilla women would be freaked out by the lifestyle even if I tried to stop. I wouldn't try to hide my past because frankly thats just not me.
So for me should I decide to date in the traditional sense. I would look for someone with a similar past that gets me. |
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