FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I'm just not that into you
I'm just not that into you
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
So..you know how it goes - You've been chatting to a potential meet. It's all going well but they say something that puts you off the scent completely.
Block and delete is too harsh. What do you say? Thanks for the chat but I'm just not that into you? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So..you know how it goes - You've been chatting to a potential meet. It's all going well but they say something that puts you off the scent completely.
Block and delete is too harsh. What do you say? Thanks for the chat but I'm just not that into you? "
thats a hard1
i just said was nice chatting but that last message was off putting
best to be upfront in my opinion |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Depends i have not replied to messages as often that sort of thing. With one person i felt that was my only option as they seemed very fragile.
Others ive told. I take it really slow before i talk dates etc so it hasnt happened too much xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Bahaha.
You bloody wish I got bored. "
Just be honest MrsM, tell them what's put you off. It might be something they didn't realise they'd done or could fix.
Good luck...x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Thanks for the input thusfar guys and gals. I'm going to have to put my big girl pants on!"
Good luck hun xx
Life was so much simpler in school when you could get your mate to do it  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Bahaha.
You bloody wish I got bored.
Just be honest MrsM, tell them what's put you off. It might be something they didn't realise they'd done or could fix.
Good luck...x"
Yeah. I know. A sensible approach. They didn't really do/say anything terrible more that my interest hasn't really peaked. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Thanks for the input thusfar guys and gals. I'm going to have to put my big girl pants on!
Good luck hun xx
Life was so much simpler in school when you could get your mate to do it "
I think this thread is the modern day equivalent. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"So..you know how it goes - You've been chatting to a potential meet. It's all going well but they say something that puts you off the scent completely.
Block and delete is too harsh. What do you say? Thanks for the chat but I'm just not that into you? "
I never find its that much to think about...
Things "die on the vine" all the time...
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I had that recently.
Had arranged a social meet with someone but then they started asking me to wear certain things at this social meet.
I cannot stand being asked to wear certain things so I told him I wasn't going to meet him anymore. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Thanks for the input thusfar guys and gals. I'm going to have to put my big girl pants on!
Good luck hun xx
Life was so much simpler in school when you could get your mate to do it
I think this thread is the modern day equivalent."
I know I will be pulling hair and amoking fags in the loo next. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It's the way it's generally done here...We just accept it as that's how women generally respond. I'll get a couple replies a week. Only ever had 2 contact me first in 4 months. It's also a reason why so many men no longer put much effort into the first message most are ignored and deleted sometimes without even being read. There are a few who don't but they are rare. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Bahaha.
You bloody wish I got bored.
Just be honest MrsM, tell them what's put you off. It might be something they didn't realise they'd done or could fix.
Good luck...x
Yeah. I know. A sensible approach. They didn't really do/say anything terrible more that my interest hasn't really peaked. "
Does the guy read the forums? Might this thread be just as harsh if not more than a block and delete? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"So..you know how it goes - You've been chatting to a potential meet. It's all going well but they say something that puts you off the scent completely.
Block and delete is too harsh. What do you say? Thanks for the chat but I'm just not that into you? "
funny enough i know exactly what you mean unfortunately, just say sorry i can't get over that comment don't think we're gonna be right for each other then block |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Take an ad out in a national newspaper- full page, front cover.
Skywrite it.
Put up my status about it.
And, truthfully- just say- I don't think we are suited x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Bahaha.
You bloody wish I got bored.
Just be honest MrsM, tell them what's put you off. It might be something they didn't realise they'd done or could fix.
Good luck...x
Yeah. I know. A sensible approach. They didn't really do/say anything terrible more that my interest hasn't really peaked.
Does the guy read the forums? Might this thread be just as harsh if not more than a block and delete?"
I have no idea. I've not said anything bad about anyone - that's not my style. I get your point though. My post is perhaps insensitive. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I had that recently.
Had arranged a social meet with someone but then they started asking me to wear certain things at this social meet.
I cannot stand being asked to wear certain things so I told him I wasn't going to meet him anymore."
But I only wanted to shag you in yer Norwich shirt  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Take an ad out in a national newspaper- full page, front cover.
Skywrite it.
Put up my status about it.
And, truthfully- just say- I don't think we are suited x"
Hehe great advice. I wonder if he reads a red top or a broadsheet. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We just say thanks but I don't think we are looking for the same things. It's the truth and has worked fine for us...
-Courtney "
This! 
Being honest has no comeback because there's nothing else to say. Provided you're kind about it then we should all be able to deal with rejection. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I just tell them, in a polite way of course. Depends what it was of course, if someone was brash then I respond in kind. It hasn't happened very much and I hadn't actually arranged dates. It tends to be when they try and impress me with things they think I want to hear, such as I'm a long stayer, I can go all night', not with me you won't I tend to reply. Doesn't overly put me off.
I did have a guy say that if I wanted he had a friend who he thought I'd like also. That unfortunately is like a red rag to me and my response is always 'i am not a free for all'. I always block for that one. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Bahaha.
You bloody wish I got bored.
Just be honest MrsM, tell them what's put you off. It might be something they didn't realise they'd done or could fix.
Good luck...x
Yeah. I know. A sensible approach. They didn't really do/say anything terrible more that my interest hasn't really peaked.
Does the guy read the forums? Might this thread be just as harsh if not more than a block and delete?
I have no idea. I've not said anything bad about anyone - that's not my style. I get your point though. My post is perhaps insensitive. "
Well I'm pretty tough and I know for sure I'd rather be blocked and have a message deleted than see people laughing about ways to tell me you didn't want to meet me. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I block people who I have no interest in or if they annoy me with messages or updates .Most of the time I put all filters on and choose who I chat too. "
Think I'm gonna get blocked then  Shall I go out on a blinder then?
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I had that last week despite saying it was a social meet, he made me uncomfortable, just too intense and seeming to expect that it was more than a social meet I asked him to cool it off he didn't and when I said we would delay rhe social je messaged a past meet to ask about me it ended up being a block and he was very very rude to my past meet,
Lucky escape |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I had that recently.
Had arranged a social meet with someone but then they started asking me to wear certain things at this social meet.
I cannot stand being asked to wear certain things so I told him I wasn't going to meet him anymore.
But I only wanted to shag you in yer Norwich shirt "
If anyone asks me to wear certain things, I say fine, as long as you wear a Norwich top for me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
Well I'm pretty tough and I know for sure I'd rather be blocked and have a message deleted than see people laughing about ways to tell me you didn't want to meet me."
I get your point. I'm a vile insensitive bitch for asking an opinion on a public forum etc. Do feel free to bang on about it a bit more. Seriously though the advice has helped. Big girl pants on! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I had that recently.
Had arranged a social meet with someone but then they started asking me to wear certain things at this social meet.
I cannot stand being asked to wear certain things so I told him I wasn't going to meet him anymore.
But I only wanted to shag you in yer Norwich shirt
If anyone asks me to wear certain things, I say fine, as long as you wear a Norwich top for me "
Deal, as long as you wear a Rams top. I did once shag a lass while she was wearing her F****t shirt though |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
Well I'm pretty tough and I know for sure I'd rather be blocked and have a message deleted than see people laughing about ways to tell me you didn't want to meet me.
I get your point. I'm a vile insensitive bitch for asking an opinion on a public forum etc. Do feel free to bang on about it a bit more. Seriously though the advice has helped. Big girl pants on!"
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I had that recently.
Had arranged a social meet with someone but then they started asking me to wear certain things at this social meet.
I cannot stand being asked to wear certain things so I told him I wasn't going to meet him anymore.
But I only wanted to shag you in yer Norwich shirt
If anyone asks me to wear certain things, I say fine, as long as you wear a Norwich top for me
Deal, as long as you wear a Rams top. I did once shag a lass while she was wearing her F****t shirt though "
Pervert...... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We just say thanks but I don't think we are looking for the same things. It's the truth and has worked fine for us...
-Courtney
This!
Being honest has no comeback because there's nothing else to say. Provided you're kind about it then we should all be able to deal with rejection. "
Just tell him. Us chaps are used to rejection.
Sobs.
Blows nose in hanky......
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'm naughty really and just tend to go quiet and hope they get the idea. I should just be honest and straight to the point really but the aggro you get off some people for being honest with them is silly. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Well I'm pretty tough and I know for sure I'd rather be blocked and have a message deleted than see people laughing about ways to tell me you didn't want to meet me.
I get your point. I'm a vile insensitive bitch for asking an opinion on a public forum etc. Do feel free to bang on about it a bit more. Seriously though the advice has helped. Big girl pants on!"
Guilty conscience? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Recently someone was open, honest and said now isn't the right time for them. It's so much easier when someone actually bothers to tell you why/if it won't happen. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Well I'm pretty tough and I know for sure I'd rather be blocked and have a message deleted than see people laughing about ways to tell me you didn't want to meet me.
I get your point. I'm a vile insensitive bitch for asking an opinion on a public forum etc. Do feel free to bang on about it a bit more. Seriously though the advice has helped. Big girl pants on!
"
I did have a chuckle at your response.
OP, if the person is waiting for you to comeback and arrange a time & place then I think you should just say that you've changed your mind. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So..you know how it goes - You've been chatting to a potential meet. It's all going well but they say something that puts you off the scent completely.
Block and delete is too harsh. What do you say? Thanks for the chat but I'm just not that into you? "
Say by the way "any chance of me putting my big strapon on and feeding you slugs and snails at the same time"?
Works everytime for me  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
Well I'm pretty tough and I know for sure I'd rather be blocked and have a message deleted than see people laughing about ways to tell me you didn't want to meet me.
I get your point. I'm a vile insensitive bitch for asking an opinion on a public forum etc. Do feel free to bang on about it a bit more. Seriously though the advice has helped. Big girl pants on!
I did have a chuckle at your response.
OP, if the person is waiting for you to comeback and arrange a time & place then I think you should just say that you've changed your mind. "
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"we usually find these things die a natural death - drift away into nothingness"
To be fair I think nearly everything does this, unless you just need sex, then you have specifics...
99 out of 100 will never come close to those specifics. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It doesn't matter how close someone got to being suitable, if they aren't for you - treat them the same as the other decent people that you're not meeting. (Hung, drawn, quartered or a polite 'no thanks', or just block). |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Thanks all. Your responses have helped.
I hitched up my pants and went with Courtney's well worded advice in the end. I couldn't ask for a better resolution. I get that I went the wrong way about it and I respect all the comments that pointed that out. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think rejection is part and parcel of Fab Life......
Try to be kind
And
Honest
Mwah x "
Rejection is good for you!
Every time in my life I have been turned down for something I want, something better has come round the corner...
Each and every "no" gets you closer to a "yes". |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So..you know how it goes - You've been chatting to a potential meet. It's all going well but they say something that puts you off the scent completely.
Block and delete is too harsh. What do you say? Thanks for the chat but I'm just not that into you? "
Oh yes you are |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Thanks all. Your responses have helped.
I hitched up my pants and went with Courtney's well worded advice in the end. I couldn't ask for a better resolution. I get that I went the wrong way about it and I respect all the comments that pointed that out. "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think rejection is part and parcel of Fab Life......
Try to be kind
And
Honest
Mwah x
Rejection is good for you!
Every time in my life I have been turned down for something I want, something better has come round the corner...
Each and every "no" gets you closer to a "yes"."
Great attitude. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It happens all the time.....some I've chatted to loads then we kinda hit a block....sometimes it's Temporary and other times not. I guess it would depend on what it was that put you off. If its that they suddenly reveal something that's a deal breaker i think I'd tell them....otherwise who knows what comes and goes |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I haven't really gone off someone with something they have said, But I'm going to have a read at some of the posts and see if I can spot any that have been used on me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It happens all the time.....some I've chatted to loads then we kinda hit a block....sometimes it's Temporary and other times not. I guess it would depend on what it was that put you off. If its that they suddenly reveal something that's a deal breaker i think I'd tell them....otherwise who knows what comes and goes"
Yeah I get this, you don't know what's going on in people's lives.
There's nothing wrong with parking and revisiting it.
Text is a terrible medium, unless you're a professional writer, it's difficult to add weight to what you say...
Worse and I get this on Tinder a lot, I find myself answering the same questions over and over, which sometimes makes me blunt or curt, when I'm busy it can appear arrogant...
but it's just the medium. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It happens all the time.....some I've chatted to loads then we kinda hit a block....sometimes it's Temporary and other times not. I guess it would depend on what it was that put you off. If its that they suddenly reveal something that's a deal breaker i think I'd tell them....otherwise who knows what comes and goes
Yeah I get this, you don't know what's going on in people's lives.
There's nothing wrong with parking and revisiting it.
Text is a terrible medium, unless you're a professional writer, it's difficult to add weight to what you say...
Worse and I get this on Tinder a lot, I find myself answering the same questions over and over, which sometimes makes me blunt or curt, when I'm busy it can appear arrogant...
but it's just the medium."
.....noted |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It happens all the time.....some I've chatted to loads then we kinda hit a block....sometimes it's Temporary and other times not. I guess it would depend on what it was that put you off. If its that they suddenly reveal something that's a deal breaker i think I'd tell them....otherwise who knows what comes and goes
Yeah I get this, you don't know what's going on in people's lives.
There's nothing wrong with parking and revisiting it.
Text is a terrible medium, unless you're a professional writer, it's difficult to add weight to what you say...
Worse and I get this on Tinder a lot, I find myself answering the same questions over and over, which sometimes makes me blunt or curt, when I'm busy it can appear arrogant...
but it's just the medium.
.....noted "
You cheeky..... I might look for another job!!  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It happens all the time.....some I've chatted to loads then we kinda hit a block....sometimes it's Temporary and other times not. I guess it would depend on what it was that put you off. If its that they suddenly reveal something that's a deal breaker i think I'd tell them....otherwise who knows what comes and goes
Yeah I get this, you don't know what's going on in people's lives.
There's nothing wrong with parking and revisiting it.
Text is a terrible medium, unless you're a professional writer, it's difficult to add weight to what you say...
Worse and I get this on Tinder a lot, I find myself answering the same questions over and over, which sometimes makes me blunt or curt, when I'm busy it can appear arrogant...
but it's just the medium.
.....noted
You cheeky..... I might look for another job!! "
I haven't offered you the last one yet |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"So..you know how it goes - You've been chatting to a potential meet. It's all going well but they say something that puts you off the scent completely.
Block and delete is too harsh. What do you say? Thanks for the chat but I'm just not that into you? "
I usually say, not for me and block xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Recently someone was open, honest and said now isn't the right time for them. It's so much easier when someone actually bothers to tell you why/if it won't happen. "
Yes that's a good answer, neither offends them as in cannot take it personally as so many do, and it gives time too. In many cases you can later change your mind...bridges not burnt. Good approach. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
