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The perfect profile...

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By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

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By *ickawitchCouple over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Can I have yours when you have finished with him please? He sounds perfect

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By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Can I have yours when you have finished with him please? He sounds perfect

He will be free 3 weekends a month, keep him warm for me!

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By *ickawitchCouple over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Can I have yours when you have finished with him please? He sounds perfect

He will be free 3 weekends a month, keep him warm for me!

Ohhhhhh I will definitely do that

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Cougar

Age: 53

Height 5.7

Build Slim

Hair: Blonde hair to shoulders

Dress: Red slutty tight dress

Boobs: DD's

Have a meet every fri or sat evening and watch tv and be naughty and when it is summer have a barbeque in her garden

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

Add 3 inches and I'm there. Oh yes and 17 years

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By *obbytupperMan over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley

Will stick his dipstick in your clutch and check your exhaust?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Slightly scatty

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By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Add 3 inches and I'm there. Oh yes and 17 years

Ah bladey, you know I luv ya! Xx

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

"Add 3 inches and I'm there. Oh yes and 17 years

Ah bladey, you know I luv ya! Xx "

Not enough obviously

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By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Slightly scatty

Wondering how long it'll take someone on here who knows me to disagree with 'slightly'

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

"Add 3 inches and I'm there. Oh yes and 17 years

Ah bladey, you know I luv ya! Xx "

By fuck your looking good though

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By *ickawitchCouple over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

"Add 3 inches and I'm there. Oh yes and 17 years

I would have you if you would let me

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By *ce WingerMan over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

I would like to meet a slightly balding bisexual guy, with an averaged sized cock who knows how to tickle my fancy. Must be able to cook and make me laugh. I like kisses and cuddles as well as raw passionate rampant sex, so if you can provide those as well that would be a bonus.

A man can wish I suppose

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By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Age: 35

Height: 6ft to 6ft 2

Build: swimmers

Sleeve tattoos

Pierced ears

Has to have the brain of Professor Cox and the sense of humour of Dara O'Brian. Has to like an aging manic pixie dreamgirl who is a raging radical liberal. Must be tolerant of strange music and snoring.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

40; 6'5; athletic; no/few tattoos; lives near me; knows his theres from his theirs and has a sense of humour.

All the rest is negotiable

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By *ed LipstickWoman over a year ago

Fucksville

Bloke over 6ft

Athletic with tattoos

Ideally wears a uniform such as copper, fireman or squaddie

Loves giving and receiving oral

A repeater

Preferably a bit dom

Honest, genuine and as fussy as me!

I've only met a couple!

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

"40; 6'5; athletic; no/few tattoos; lives near me; knows his theres from his theirs and has a sense of humour.

All the rest is negotiable

Bollex and anther miss

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By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Will stick his dipstick in your clutch and check your exhaust?

Ooh I do hope so!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Age: 40s - 50s Young looking

Height: 6.3

Build: solid

Hair: salt and pepper / bald

Dress: dark suit, white shirt, cufflinks

Endowment: plenty

Two weekends away a month for play, clubs and new experiences...

Mwah x

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By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Slightly scatty

Are you a Mechanic? Could you pretend to be?

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

"Add 3 inches and I'm there. Oh yes and 17 years

I would have you if you would let me

Arrr but your not single so well you no

but I'm flattered thank you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Would like a guy that I could meet every weekend for sex, film watching and eating. As long as he's handome and tall with a big dick thats enough.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"40; 6'5; athletic; no/few tattoos; lives near me; knows his theres from his theirs and has a sense of humour.

All the rest is negotiable

There's a man in my inbox matches that description exactly (apart from the living near you bit), if geography isn't that much of an issue - PM me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Slightly scatty

Are you a Mechanic? Could you pretend to be?

I'm a fork lift truck mechanic, will that do?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

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By *olgateMan over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

A pulse

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Age: 28

Height: 6 ft 2

Build: Toned but not overly muscular

Hair & eyes: Not fussy

Meeting about twice a month. Sometimes cheeky weekends away but at least an overnight stay at ones house. Relaxed evenings with wine and good convo, sex and play that lasts for hours, and of course a lovely lie in.

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By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Slightly scatty

Are you a Mechanic? Could you pretend to be?

I'm a fork lift truck mechanic, will that do?

Do you have overalls and workbooks?

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

"A pulse

Fuck yesssss I'm in

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

"A pulse

Fuck yesssss I'm in

Shit no I'm not runs off quick

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Slightly scatty

Are you a Mechanic? Could you pretend to be?

I'm a fork lift truck mechanic, will that do?

Do you have overalls and workbooks?

No workbooks Definitely have the overalls and work boots as well

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Slightly scatty

Are you a Mechanic? Could you pretend to be?

I'm a fork lift truck mechanic, will that do?

Do you have overalls and workbooks?

No workbooks Definitely have the overalls and work boots as well

Fucking new phone!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A woman, early 20s to late 40s,no preference for body type. Possibly black, possibly with red hair, possibly with green eyes but equally possibly none of the above.

She will hopefully enjoy lighthearted chatting, silly films, cuddles, snuggles, kissing and passionate sex on a reasonably regular basis.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Slightly scatty

Are you a Mechanic? Could you pretend to be?

I'm a fork lift truck mechanic, will that do?

Do you have overalls and workbooks?

No workbooks Definitely have the overalls and work boots as well

Fucking new phone!

Don't blame the phone we all know your getting hot and bothered thinking about the overalls

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By *bb666Woman over a year ago

derby

Age: 40s - 50s Young looking

Height: 6.3

Build: solid

Hair: salt and pepper / bald

Dress: dark suit, white shirt, cufflinks

Endowment: plenty

Two weekends away a month for play, clubs and new experiences...

Mwah x

This for me too!!

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By *uzzybeWoman over a year ago

Darlington

28-49

5'7 +

Some tatts

athletic to stocky build

Enjoys random nights out and movie nights in with munchies, the duvet and marvel lounge pants

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

OK here go's

35 plus

5ft 10+

Manchester ish

Single

Biker lover or at least pillon with own leathers but I have spares

Good sense of humour (you'll need it)

Sycos need not apply

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/01/16 21:26:13]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A guy in his mid 20s with nice hair I can run my fingers through

Height - 5'10 ideally but anything over 5'8

Average length, decent girth but I don't care really as long as it's not a micro penis

Nicely toned as opposed to muscly

Great sense of humour, into nasty sex as much as the kissing and cuddling side

Brings wine

Not fussed what he does work wise as long as he's not a bum!

Can give me a seeing to once or twice a week and is open-minded in the bedroom....as I met someone recently who freaked out when I playfully wiped some oh his own cum on him. Went running to the bathroom in disgust...loser!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"28-49

5'7 +

Some tatts

athletic to stocky build

Enjoys random nights out and movie nights in with munchies, the duvet and marvel lounge pants"

That's me that is

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well more stocky than athletic

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

apart from the long hair that sounds just like my wife

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Female, 30s to 50s but slight leeway, nice smile, good sense of humour, grounded and down to earth, likes cuddles and kisses, nice friendly welcoming eyes .... oh and someone not averse to wobbly middle aged fugly men

Please.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

So just 4 years and some tattoos to go :p

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By *odareyouMan over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

Lady..... Curves in all the right places..

Age 33-58

Leeds or surrounding area.

Out of the bedroom...Loves life , finds the simple things in life a pleasure ..

fun and friendly, ideally looking for something on a regular basis. With a fun friendly chatty bloke.

Happy to experiment with the right guy always dresses to please....stockings and lingerie ..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Are couples allowed to put up a request?

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By *uxom redCouple over a year ago

Shrewsbury

[Removed by poster at 05/01/16 21:49:11]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Are couples allowed to put up a request? "

I don't see why not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ok a nice couple age is not important, more importantly that we all get along and can laugh.

Not loud, brash or pushy.

He would be a Hugh jackman double or actual Hugh jackman, She-ra would be very happy.

Mr, a slightly emo version of felicity kendal would be great.

Lol

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By *exycouplemmmmCouple over a year ago

Surrey

Height: 6.2

Build: rugby type with a bit of a hairy chest

Looks: Blue eyes, salt and pepper hair

Likes: giving and receiving lots of oral, repeater with a tendency to 'pussy worship' and loves to make me cum with tongue and fingers and using toys Loves me in saucy undies, heels and stockings. Great at sexting and describing what he wants to do before we meet

Great at throwing me around the bedroom and fucking hard (when I need it)

Available: weekly for looooong slow sessions and a little cuddle/sleep in between

Don't want much eh!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Male

Age 38

Black

Lots of tattoo's

Green twinkly eyes

Nice white teeth

Big smile

Funny

A gentleman in public... but a dirty devil in private

Female

Age 38

White

Green eyes

Dark hair

Lots of tattoo's

Curvy

Funny

Smelling sweet

Angel in public, devil in private

But if you can make a great cup of coffee I'm any ones

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By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

So just 4 years and some tattoos to go :p"

26 isn't too young. The greasy overalls are non negotiable

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"OK here go's

35 plus

5ft 10+

Manchester ish

Single

Biker lover or at least pillon with own leathers but I have spares

Good sense of humour (you'll need it)

Sycos need not apply "

Sycophants or psychopaths?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/01/16 22:15:11]

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By *razedcatMan over a year ago

London / Herts

Age: 24

Height: 5'2

Build: Petite

Ethnicity: European, Hispanic or Middle Eastern

Eyes: Big and brown

Hair: Long, brown and wavy

Well educated, bookish, softly spoken. Very intelligent and open minded, but a little shy.

Likes: Long, passionate sessions with lots of deep kissing, lots of mutual oral.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

40+

5'10"+

Dark hair (blue eyes a bonus).

Brain and brawn

Sarcy soh

A dominant gentleman.

Availability negotiable as long as sex is wild

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ultimate wish list..? Hmm

Male

24-44

Defined arms (not necessarily hugely muscly)

I like tattoos but it's not a deal breaker

Funny

Smiling eyes

Darkish hair

6ft+

Can string a sentence together

Great kisser

Apply within...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Ultimate wish list..? Hmm

Male

24-44

Defined arms (not necessarily hugely muscly)

I like tattoos but it's not a deal breaker

Funny

Smiling eyes

Darkish hair

6ft+

Can string a sentence together

Great kisser

Apply within..."

Dam I am not tall enough

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

"OK here go's

35 plus

5ft 10+

Manchester ish

Single

Biker lover or at least pillon with own leathers but I have spares

Good sense of humour (you'll need it)

Sycos need not apply

Sycophants or psychopaths?

The later..... smart arse

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

"Ultimate wish list..? Hmm

Male

24-44

Defined arms (not necessarily hugely muscly)

I like tattoos but it's not a deal breaker

Funny

Smiling eyes

Darkish hair

6ft+

Can string a sentence together

Great kisser

Apply within..."

Ohhhh so close

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

For pooch he says he is looking for

Age 8 ( 54 in dog years)

Height two and a half feet

Build , Labrador / retriever

Wet nose , love of walks , chasing sticks , quantum physics,

Taff

Female , sense of humour, loves the grey outdoors , interesting , intelligent . Good kisser . And large collection of lingerie lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"OK here go's

35 plus

5ft 10+

Manchester ish

Single

Biker lover or at least pillon with own leathers but I have spares

Good sense of humour (you'll need it)

Sycos need not apply

Sycophants or psychopaths?

The later..... smart arse

I like my bum too

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Ultimate wish list..? Hmm

Male TICK

24-44 TICK (just!)

Defined arms (not necessarily hugely muscly) BUGGER

I like tattoos but it's not a deal breaker BUGGER

Funny BUGGER

Smiling eyes BUGGER

Darkish hair PARTLY TICK - GREYING

6ft+ TICK

Can string a sentence together. SOMETIMES

Great kisser BUGGER

Apply within..."

Overall ... Ah, bugger ...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Ultimate wish list..? Hmm

Male TICK

24-44 TICK (just!)

Defined arms (not necessarily hugely muscly) BUGGER

I like tattoos but it's not a deal breaker BUGGER

Funny BUGGER

Smiling eyes BUGGER

Darkish hair PARTLY TICK - GREYING

6ft+ TICK

Can string a sentence together. SOMETIMES

Great kisser BUGGER

Apply within...

Overall ... Ah, bugger ...

We might have to negotiate this level of buggery...once in a while is ok MrBerks but let's not go mad!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have any guys come in and said 'I thought this thread was about me!' yet?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can I just have George Clooney please

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well I thought I was fairly picky until i saw this thread. Only height and age really matter to me, but not to the extent that I would say ideal. Older, but not old enough to be my dad and same height or taller. But clearly there's a lot more to it than all the descriptions, but unsure until met.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Age-35

Height-6ft

Build-muscular

Tattoos-lots!

Hair-dark

Eyes-brown

Can accomodate.

Uniformed guy with a great sense of humour and a filthy mind.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well I thought I was fairly picky until i saw this thread. Only height and age really matter to me, but not to the extent that I would say ideal. Older, but not old enough to be my dad and same height or taller. But clearly there's a lot more to it than all the descriptions, but unsure until met. "

That's just the 'ideal'.. I'm not really that picky haha x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Would be nice to find...

Age: 40's

Height: 6ft+

Build: in proportion

Location: within an hour of me

Sense of humour: a must

FWB ideally, available say at least once a month, would be happy to attend clubs / party nights with me as well.

Apply: now!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Lady..... Curves in all the right places..

Age 33-58

Leeds or surrounding area.

Out of the bedroom...Loves life , finds the simple things in life a pleasure ..

fun and friendly, ideally looking for something on a regular basis. With a fun friendly chatty bloke.

Happy to experiment with the right guy always dresses to please....stockings and lingerie ..

er... hello

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Would be nice to find...

Age: 40's

Height: 6ft+

Build: in proportion

Location: within an hour of me

Sense of humour: a must

FWB ideally, available say at least once a month, would be happy to attend clubs / party nights with me as well.

Apply: now!!

Great advert for Chomps as well

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Not ticked

Ticked

Not ticked

Ticked

ish

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Ultimate wish list..? Hmm

Male

24-44

Defined arms (not necessarily hugely muscly)

I like tattoos but it's not a deal breaker

Funny

Smiling eyes

Darkish hair

6ft+

Can string a sentence together

Great kisser

Apply within..."

Male - Yes

27 (nearly 28)

Defined arms - tiny bit

No tattoos

Funny - Some people find me funny

Smiling eyes - I think so

Darkish hair - more auburn

6ft+ - just 6ft

Can string a sentence together - yes.

Great kisser - last time I tried I was

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

"Would be nice to find...

Age: 40's

Height: 6ft+

Build: in proportion

Location: within an hour of me

Sense of humour: a must

FWB ideally, available say at least once a month, would be happy to attend clubs / party nights with me as well.

Apply: now!!

Sharp intake of breath an hour a strate run with no police and I recon it's just possible

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sex;...........female

Height;........over 3', under 7'

Build;.........from slim to large

Hair;..........some(not a deal breaker)

Pulse;.........preferable

....hope I'm not being too fussy..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Women

Age: 20-30

Height: 5ft 4in - 5ft 8in

Build: Average or Slim/Athletic

Maybe have some tattoos

Maybe have some piercings

Lives near me

Has a great sense of humour, can laugh at herself. Doesn't take things too seriously and looks after herself, has respect for herself and can teach me a thing or two :P

Free for a friends with benefits relationship and can meet every now and again at each other's or in a hotel.

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By *ady LickWoman over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Perfect man:

Age - between 38 and 49

Height - over 5'11

Build - big and strong

Looks - Handsomely rugged

Location - within 30 min drives

About - appreciates a lady in lingerie and heels. Has a good sense of humour. Likes to push boundaries as well as post sex cuddles. Adores oral sex both ways. Wants a woman to dominant him from time to time. Happy to attend clubs. Provides cake.

And the she woke......

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Age : Any

Sex : Any

Chats shit easily : Yes

Listens to me chat shit easily : Yes

Likes cakes and scones : A must

Combines all the above : Bingo

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can I just have George Clooney please

Care for a Nespresso??

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Perfect man:

Age - between 38 and 49

Height - over 5'11

Build - big and strong

Looks - Handsomely rugged

Location - within 30 min drives

And the she woke......

Aww almost there apart from the distance grr I so need to invent jet powered rocket pants

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Woman

Age 21 and 45

Body type slim to curvy

Hair colour red or blonde

Outgoing fun to be around is open minded likes horror movies has a sense of humour .

Height between 5 and 5 ft 9 as im only 5 6 haha

Has great stamina in the bedroom likes indoor and outdoor sex adventorous and open minded

And just someone who doesnt judge a book by its cover xx

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *heOwlMan over a year ago

Altrincham

"Perfect man:

Age - between 38 and 49

Height - over 5'11

Build - big and strong

Looks - Handsomely rugged

Location - within 30 min drives

And the she woke......

Like the About bit - glutin free cake ok

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ady LickWoman over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

"Perfect man:

Age - between 38 and 49

Height - over 5'11

Build - big and strong

Looks - Handsomely rugged

Location - within 30 min drives

And the she woke......

Like the About bit - glutin free cake ok

I can't believe no one has mentioned cake.

I forgot to mention availability of non existent man....

"Will be available whenever I'm needed"

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Age - 27-35

Height - 5'0"-5'7"

Build - petite to curvy

Looks - pretty face, rock chick/goth

About- kinky, good sense of humour, likes rock n roll, being silly and filthy fucking.

Pretty much already found someone like this. Lives in silly brum though. Stupid geography.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *heOwlMan over a year ago

Altrincham

"Perfect man:

Age - between 38 and 49

Height - over 5'11

Build - big and strong

Looks - Handsomely rugged

Location - within 30 min drives

And the she woke......

Like the About bit - glutin free cake ok

I can't believe no one has mentioned cake.

I forgot to mention availability of non existent man....

"Will be available whenever I'm needed""

Ah yes, Build, Looks and Location would put me firmly in the non existant box - oops.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *nne BoleynWoman over a year ago

Gateshead

Male, 42, minimum 6ft

Newcastle ish

A Dom history geek who likes kisses and cuddles and has a sense of adventure.

To meet 2 or 3 times a month with occasional weekend away and random zip wires.

Ex forces

Must like cats, green tea and owns a whip!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Age 21 and 45

Body type slim to curvy

Hair colour red or blonde

Outgoing fun to be around is open minded likes horror movies has a sense of humour .

Height between 5 and 5 ft 9 as im only 5 6 haha

Has great stamina in the bedroom likes indoor and outdoor sex adventorous and open minded

And just someone who doesnt judge a book by its cover xx

Hello

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Age 21 and 45

Body type slim to curvy

Hair colour red or blonde

Outgoing fun to be around is open minded likes horror movies has a sense of humour .

Height between 5 and 5 ft 9 as im only 5 6 haha

Has great stamina in the bedroom likes indoor and outdoor sex adventorous and open minded

And just someone who doesnt judge a book by its cover xx

Hello

Why hello bella you are my ideal woman indeed loving the profile xx

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

That's just the 'ideal'.. I'm not really that picky haha x"

I'm not that fussy either - I was going for "perfect"

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't natch anyone's preferences YET

Soooooo

Female

23-38

Slim-curvy not bbw

Natural boobs

Nice eyes

Decent smile

Not much to ask for

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't match anyone's preferences YET

Soooooo

Female

23-38

Slim-curvy not bbw

Natural boobs

Nice eyes

Decent smile

Not much to ask for

Match*

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Man in his 30's to 40's

Over 6'0 tall

Footballer's physique

Dark haired, either clean shaven or short trimmed beard

Couple of tattoos

Is single, lives in Reading

Can accommodate

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Female

Over 35

Resting heart rate less than 66 bpm

Body has been exposed to sunlight within last year.

Own teeth.

Curves resting above belly button.

Can pronounce at least 12 words with more than 5 letters.

And most importantly. ...smiles!!!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Age 21 and 45

Body type slim to curvy

Hair colour red or blonde

Outgoing fun to be around is open minded likes horror movies has a sense of humour .

Height between 5 and 5 ft 9 as im only 5 6 haha

Has great stamina in the bedroom likes indoor and outdoor sex adventorous and open minded

And just someone who doesnt judge a book by its cover xx

Hello

Hello you ive sent you a little message xx

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Man in his 30's to 40's

Over 6'0 tall

Footballer's physique

Dark haired, either clean shaven or short trimmed beard

Couple of tattoos

Is single, lives in Reading

Can accommodate

I have the physique of Alan Brazil - does that count?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Male

23-45

Toned but not overly musclular

Taller than me about 5"10+

Funny

Loads of pictures to perve at

Intelligent

Big bright eyes

Pretty face

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Male

23-45

Toned but not overly musclular

Taller than me about 5"10+

Funny

Loads of pictures to perve at

Intelligent

Big bright eyes

Pretty face

I tick.most of them.boxes haha x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/01/16 07:35:58]

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Male

23-45

Toned but not overly musclular

Taller than me about 5"10+

Funny

Loads of pictures to perve at

Intelligent

Big bright eyes

Pretty face

I tick.most of them.boxes haha x

*all of them boxes

Thanks mAybe we can message and get to know.one another then and arrange something x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

apart from the long hair that sounds just like my wife

The long hairs negotiable

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

apart from the long hair that sounds just like my wife

The long hairs negotiable

Whats yours vara x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I clearly don't fit in on here.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

"I clearly don't fit in on here. "

That's 2 of us then

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

apart from the long hair that sounds just like my wife

The long hairs negotiable

Whats yours vara x"
The above. Men wise the below:

35-45 negotiable

height 5ft+

Really gsoh

has own hair

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

apart from the long hair that sounds just like my wife

The long hairs negotiable

Whats yours vara x The above. Men wise the below:

35-45 negotiable

height 5ft+

Really gsoh

has own hair

I am out of age range but tick rest of boxes haha x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *accaMan over a year ago

leicester

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

apart from the long hair that sounds just like my wife

The long hairs negotiable

Whats yours vara x The above. Men wise the below:

35-45 negotiable

height 5ft+

Really gsoh

has own hair

That's me then lol

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

That's just the 'ideal'.. I'm not really that picky haha x

I'm not that fussy either - I was going for "perfect"

Perfect would also be on speed dial and come with food

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *rightonsteveMan over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Crikey! I don't meet anyone's criteria.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Crikey! I don't meet anyone's criteria. "

Me neither! To be fair everyone's describing their *perfect* meet but, bloody hell, there needs to be a heck of a lot of relaxing of criteria for me to even start to come into the frame!

Where are all the tubby middle aged fugly lovers!?!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"I don't natch anyone's preferences YET

Soooooo

Female

23-38

Slim-curvy not bbw

Natural boobs

Nice eyes

Decent smile

Not much to ask for

Oh I was so close!!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Male

Aged 25-40

Build - cuddly but not fat but doesn't mind me being fat lulz

Long hair, preferably dark brown or black

Big brown eyes

5ft 10 and above

7 inch dick with a good girth

Tattoos, but only decent tattoos.

Piercings but not dick piercings

Good sense of humour, intelligent, witty, geeky, into metal music and likes going to gigs and festivals. Also laid back too would be good.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Male

Aged 25-40

Build - cuddly but not fat but doesn't mind me being fat lulz

Long hair, preferably dark brown or black

Big brown eyes

5ft 10 and above

7 inch dick with a good girth

Tattoos, but only decent tattoos.

Piercings but not dick piercings

Good sense of humour, intelligent, witty, geeky, into metal music and likes going to gigs and festivals. Also laid back too would be good."

Well.hello x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Crikey! I don't meet anyone's criteria.

Me neither! To be fair everyone's describing their *perfect* meet but, bloody hell, there needs to be a heck of a lot of relaxing of criteria for me to even start to come into the frame!

Where are all the tubby middle aged fugly lovers!?!

Well seeing as I've met someone 6 years under and another 12 years over my perfect age and none of them were mechanics. It's just what my perfect guy would look like.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Crikey! I don't meet anyone's criteria.

Me neither! To be fair everyone's describing their *perfect* meet but, bloody hell, there needs to be a heck of a lot of relaxing of criteria for me to even start to come into the frame!

Where are all the tubby middle aged fugly lovers!?!

*cough*

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Male

Aged 25-40

Build - cuddly but not fat but doesn't mind me being fat lulz

Long hair, preferably dark brown or black

Big brown eyes

5ft 10 and above

7 inch dick with a good girth

Tattoos, but only decent tattoos.

Piercings but not dick piercings

Good sense of humour, intelligent, witty, geeky, into metal music and likes going to gigs and festivals. Also laid back too would be good."
Can i borrow him once a month?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't natch anyone's preferences YET

Soooooo

Female

23-38

Slim-curvy not bbw

Natural boobs

Nice eyes

Decent smile

Not much to ask for

Oh I was so close!! "

How close?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

"Crikey! I don't meet anyone's criteria.

Me neither! To be fair everyone's describing their *perfect* meet but, bloody hell, there needs to be a heck of a lot of relaxing of criteria for me to even start to come into the frame!

Where are all the tubby middle aged fugly lovers!?!

Well seeing as I've met someone 6 years under and another 12 years over my perfect age and none of them were mechanics. It's just what my perfect guy would look like. "

You might as well go the extra 5 then and hey you'll at least get your car serviced

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"I don't natch anyone's preferences YET

Soooooo

Female

23-38

Slim-curvy not bbw

Natural boobs

Nice eyes

Decent smile

Not much to ask for

Oh I was so close!!

How close?

Just one thats not right x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Crikey! I don't meet anyone's criteria.

Me neither! To be fair everyone's describing their *perfect* meet but, bloody hell, there needs to be a heck of a lot of relaxing of criteria for me to even start to come into the frame!

Where are all the tubby middle aged fugly lovers!?!

*perfect* as opposed to maybe the reality, well for me anyway

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Female, pretty, smiley, relaxed, intelligent, an inventive mind, a healthy bit of kink, has that *something* about them which I can't even describe to myself which gets me excited just by the thought of them.

And of course, someone who fancies me! It would be a bugger to find all of that for them to slowly back out of the door then sprint away screaming after they saw me

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Ooh, I'm almost 35!! No tattoos though

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Male

Aged 25-40

Build - cuddly but not fat but doesn't mind me being fat lulz

Long hair, preferably dark brown or black

Big brown eyes

5ft 10 and above

7 inch dick with a good girth

Tattoos, but only decent tattoos.

Piercings but not dick piercings

Good sense of humour, intelligent, witty, geeky, into metal music and likes going to gigs and festivals. Also laid back too would be good.

Well.hello x"

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Male

Aged 25-40

Build - cuddly but not fat but doesn't mind me being fat lulz

Long hair, preferably dark brown or black

Big brown eyes

5ft 10 and above

7 inch dick with a good girth

Tattoos, but only decent tattoos.

Piercings but not dick piercings

Good sense of humour, intelligent, witty, geeky, into metal music and likes going to gigs and festivals. Also laid back too would be good. Can i borrow him once a month?

Of course, I got to find him first

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't natch anyone's preferences YET

Soooooo

Female

23-38

Slim-curvy not bbw

Natural boobs

Nice eyes

Decent smile

Not much to ask for

Oh I was so close!!

How close?

Just one thats not right x"

One off isn't bad

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Ooh, I'm almost 35!! No tattoos though

Tattoos are negotiable

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Male

Aged 25-40

Build - cuddly but not fat but doesn't mind me being fat lulz

Long hair, preferably dark brown or black

Big brown eyes

5ft 10 and above

7 inch dick with a good girth

Tattoos, but only decent tattoos.

Piercings but not dick piercings

Good sense of humour, intelligent, witty, geeky, into metal music and likes going to gigs and festivals. Also laid back too would be good. Can i borrow him once a month?

Of course, I got to find him first

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Male

Aged 25-40

Build - cuddly but not fat but doesn't mind me being fat lulz

Long hair, preferably dark brown or black

Big brown eyes

5ft 10 and above

7 inch dick with a good girth

Tattoos, but only decent tattoos.

Piercings but not dick piercings

Good sense of humour, intelligent, witty, geeky, into metal music and likes going to gigs and festivals. Also laid back too would be good."

I meet most of those, I don't have any tattoos or piercings, and my hair is long but more of an auburn /ginger colour and my eyes are blue. I like metal as well as loads of other music, I like going to gigs and festivals, I don't mind curves and I'm reasonably intelligent with a definite geeky streak.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

You two would look good together

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ingle Beds LassWoman over a year ago

Bedfordshire

Mmmmmmmm

Male 45-50

Over 6ft

17st +

Active but not too active

Mischievous

Happy go lucky

Must like Kestrels (or similar as other establishments of this nature are also available)

Spontaneous!!!

Ummmmmm that should do I think

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

Can I be your miss reality

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

You two would look good together

I think so

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

Can I be your miss reality

Fancy a fuck?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

Can I be your miss reality

If you gorgeous ladies would like someone to snuggle with

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

Can I be your miss reality

If you gorgeous ladies would like someone to snuggle with

worth a try

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My ultimate man would be:

Age: 30-45

Height: taller the better, but at least 6ft

Build: not fussed too much as long as they are strong enough to to be rough with me!

Length/girth doesn't matter too much as long as they know what to do with it

About: GSOH, kinky, good at sexting, would like to be regular FB, preferably localish, sexually dominant, not a nutter, likes bbw (size 18)

Not asking for much ha ha!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ola.Woman over a year ago

Just where I need to be.

Man

6ft +

38-48 fab age

Athletic with a bit of softness

Sense of humour

Great kisser

Must like women who dress up and tease.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

Can I be your miss reality

Fancy a fuck?

Ooh grab your coat lovely

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

Can I be your miss reality

If you gorgeous ladies would like someone to snuggle with

Not until I've had my wicked way with her

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

Can I be your miss reality

Fancy a fuck?

Ooh grab your coat lovely

Done!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *accaMan over a year ago

leicester

"Man

6ft +

38-48 fab age

Athletic with a bit of softness

Sense of humour

Great kisser

Must like women who dress up and tease.

Missing the 6ft.. But an amazing teasing kisser apparently

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

Can I be your miss reality

Fancy a fuck?

Ooh grab your coat lovely

Done!

Yes im a betting man, so My money's on this for the first fuck of the thread

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Male

Aged 25-40

Build - cuddly but not fat but doesn't mind me being fat lulz

Long hair, preferably dark brown or black

Big brown eyes

5ft 10 and above

7 inch dick with a good girth

Tattoos, but only decent tattoos.

Piercings but not dick piercings

Good sense of humour, intelligent, witty, geeky, into metal music and likes going to gigs and festivals. Also laid back too would be good.

Well.hello x

Maybe i could be the guy your looking for x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For pooch he says he is looking for

Age 8 ( 54 in dog years)

Height two and a half feet

Build , Labrador / retriever

Wet nose , love of walks , chasing sticks , quantum physics,

Taff

Female , sense of humour, loves the grey outdoors , interesting , intelligent . Good kisser . And large collection of lingerie lol

Tick to both

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

Shame I'm not 35 with long hair

Now now miss reality is sometimes better than fabtasy

Can I be your miss reality

If you gorgeous ladies would like someone to snuggle with

Not until I've had my wicked way with her

You have your wicked way with each other and I'll provide some extra body heat when things have cooled down a little

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Mmmmmmmm

Male 45-50

Over 6ft

17st +

Active but not too active

Mischievous

Happy go lucky

Must like Kestrels (or similar as other establishments of this nature are also available)

Spontaneous!!!

Ummmmmm that should do I think

Where do I post my husband?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Crikey! I don't meet anyone's criteria.

Me neither! To be fair everyone's describing their *perfect* meet but, bloody hell, there needs to be a heck of a lot of relaxing of criteria for me to even start to come into the frame!

Where are all the tubby middle aged fugly lovers!?!

I haven't checked to see if I fit anyone's criteria. I just meant that everyone seems to have an idea of what their ideal person would be, and it's a list of things.

My only criteria is that they have to be respectful. Hence I don't fit in.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A Lady in public.....

Curves in all the right places...but looks after her body (active)

Age...not important

Sexy smile a deep eyes to get lost in.

Mind...Very important - educated with a sarcastic with and filthy sexy twist.

Location...I'd problem move if I found here lol.

In bedroon... imaginative, creative, strong mind to know how to control edging....into tantric....insatiable.

Out of the bedroom...Positive bouncy attitude , loves simple things in life....

Sapiophile and Sapiosexual

Must love kissing and be very tactile, love cuddles, spooning and endless for play.

Long dark hair and dark skinned would be a bonus.

I'm waiting

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"A Lady in public.....

Curves in all the right places...but looks after her body (active)

Age...not important

Sexy smile a deep eyes to get lost in.

Mind...Very important - educated with a sarcastic with and filthy sexy twist.

Location...I'd problem move if I found here lol.

In bedroon... imaginative, creative, strong mind to know how to control edging....into tantric....insatiable.

Out of the bedroom...Positive bouncy attitude , loves simple things in life....

Sapiophile and Sapiosexual

Must love kissing and be very tactile, love cuddles, spooning and endless for play.

Long dark hair and dark skinned would be a bonus.

I'm waiting

Pfft, what's all this long hair nonsense!

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By *eforfuncplCouple over a year ago

Morecambe

Thought ours was perfik lmao

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By *unky monkeyMan over a year ago

in the night garden

Sex: Female

Age: Timeless

Colour: Blue

Breasts: Three

Hat: Fez

Angle of hat: Jaunty

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By *ingle Beds LassWoman over a year ago

Bedfordshire

"Mmmmmmmm

Male 45-50

Over 6ft

17st +

Active but not too active

Mischievous

Happy go lucky

Must like Kestrels (or similar as other establishments of this nature are also available)

Spontaneous!!!

Ummmmmm that should do I think

Where do I post my husband?

Jct 25 on M25 just let me know when you've rolled him out the car, I'll go get him

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By *issHottieBottie OP Woman over a year ago

Kent

"Crikey! I don't meet anyone's criteria.

Me neither! To be fair everyone's describing their *perfect* meet but, bloody hell, there needs to be a heck of a lot of relaxing of criteria for me to even start to come into the frame!

Where are all the tubby middle aged fugly lovers!?!

I haven't checked to see if I fit anyone's criteria. I just meant that everyone seems to have an idea of what their ideal person would be, and it's a list of things.

My only criteria is that they have to be respectful. Hence I don't fit in. "

Oh goodness If I did my perfect personality match that would be w whole different thread, respectful and funny and lots of other things too x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"A Lady in public.....

Curves in all the right places...but looks after her body (active)

Age...not important

Sexy smile a deep eyes to get lost in.

Mind...Very important - educated with a sarcastic with and filthy sexy twist.

Location...I'd problem move if I found here lol.

In bedroon... imaginative, creative, strong mind to know how to control edging....into tantric....insatiable.

Out of the bedroom...Positive bouncy attitude , loves simple things in life....

Sapiophile and Sapiosexual

Must love kissing and be very tactile, love cuddles, spooning and endless for play.

Long dark hair and dark skinned would be a bonus.

I'm waiting

This is me

... Except I smoke

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ideal female date?

45 - 55, or older, or younger

Blonde, or brunette, or redhead

Medium tits, or small, or big, or huge

Medium legs, or long, or short

Medium build, or slim, or athletic, or curvy

Non smoker, or non smoker

Biker, or biker

Think that sums it up

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"A Lady in public.....

Curves in all the right places...but looks after her body (active)

Age...not important

Sexy smile a deep eyes to get lost in.

Mind...Very important - educated with a sarcastic with and filthy sexy twist.

Location...I'd problem move if I found here lol.

In bedroon... imaginative, creative, strong mind to know how to control edging....into tantric....insatiable.

Out of the bedroom...Positive bouncy attitude , loves simple things in life....

Sapiophile and Sapiosexual

Must love kissing and be very tactile, love cuddles, spooning and endless for play.

Long dark hair and dark skinned would be a bonus.

I'm waiting

This is me

... Except I smoke

Hang on missed a bit... Intelligence doesn't really turn me on as such

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can I just have George Clooney please

Care for a Nespresso??

Now you're talking

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Mmmmmmmm

Male 45-50

Over 6ft

17st +

Active but not too active

Mischievous

Happy go lucky

Must like Kestrels (or similar as other establishments of this nature are also available)

Spontaneous!!!

Ummmmmm that should do I think

Where do I post my husband?

Jct 25 on M25 just let me know when you've rolled him out the car, I'll go get him

Done

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"A Lady in public.....

Curves in all the right places...but looks after her body (active)

Age...not important

Sexy smile a deep eyes to get lost in.

Mind...Very important - educated with a sarcastic with and filthy sexy twist.

Location...I'd problem move if I found here lol.

In bedroon... imaginative, creative, strong mind to know how to control edging....into tantric....insatiable.

Out of the bedroom...Positive bouncy attitude , loves simple things in life....

Sapiophile and Sapiosexual

Must love kissing and be very tactile, love cuddles, spooning and endless for play.

Long dark hair and dark skinned would be a bonus.

I'm waiting

Pfft, what's all this long hair nonsense!

Nice to run your hands through....or tie up

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"A Lady in public.....

Curves in all the right places...but looks after her body (active)

Age...not important

Sexy smile a deep eyes to get lost in.

Mind...Very important - educated with a sarcastic with and filthy sexy twist.

Location...I'd problem move if I found here lol.

In bedroon... imaginative, creative, strong mind to know how to control edging....into tantric....insatiable.

Out of the bedroom...Positive bouncy attitude , loves simple things in life....

Sapiophile and Sapiosexual

Must love kissing and be very tactile, love cuddles, spooning and endless for play.

Long dark hair and dark skinned would be a bonus.

I'm waiting

This is me

... Except I smoke

I did forget that important bit...

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Write the profile of your perfect meet.

Age: 30

Height: 5ft 10

Build: athletic

Lots of tattoos

Few piercings

Mechanic with own workshop and plentiful supply of greasy overalls looking for once a month weekend long meet fri-sun with slightly scatty tattooed short arse!

Can I have yours when you have finished with him please? He sounds perfect

He will be free 3 weekends a month, keep him warm for me!

Ohhhhhh I will definitely do that

I will be posting my oily overalls in pics very soon!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Posting your perfect fab....becomes counterproductive lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sex: Female

Age: Timeless

Colour: Blue

Breasts: Three

Hat: Fez

Angle of hat: Jaunty

I'm surprised your friend Mark, who is a Ninja, doesn't know anyone like that

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By *unky monkeyMan over a year ago

in the night garden

"Sex: Female

Age: Timeless

Colour: Blue

Breasts: Three

Hat: Fez

Angle of hat: Jaunty

I'm surprised your friend Mark, who is a Ninja, doesn't know anyone like that

My friend Mark (who is a ninja) has three he keeps in the hole in his cellar but he wont share.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/01/16 10:44:04]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sex: Female

Age: Timeless

Colour: Blue

Breasts: Three

Hat: Fez

Angle of hat: Jaunty

I'm surprised your friend Mark, who is a Ninja, doesn't know anyone like that

My friend Mark (who is a ninja) has three he keeps in the hole in his cellar but he wont share.

And you call him a friend?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can I just have George Clooney please

Care for a Nespresso??

Now you're talking

How do you take it?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's been eye opening to see how many people im not compatible with

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

1 female

2 pulse

3 likes a laugh

Perfect

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It's been eye opening to see how many people im not compatible with

big hugs Mr xxx

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By *ingle Beds LassWoman over a year ago

Bedfordshire

"Mmmmmmmm

Male 45-50

Over 6ft

17st +

Active but not too active

Mischievous

Happy go lucky

Must like Kestrels (or similar as other establishments of this nature are also available)

Spontaneous!!!

Ummmmmm that should do I think

Where do I post my husband?

Jct 25 on M25 just let me know when you've rolled him out the car, I'll go get him

Done

Have I been?!?!?!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Haha this makes me chuckle.

Is there such a thing as a perfect meet?

Having the aesthetics is only half of it in my humble opinion

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It's been eye opening to see how many people im not compatible with

But in reality, if there's no connection it wouldn't matter if they fit all my physical wants. It's the mental connection that's more important at the end of the day

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Posting your perfect fab....becomes counterproductive lol "

Very few who use forums message me anyway

Plus if you tell a car dealer you want an Aston Martin.. He will still try and sell you something else

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Woman

Lots of curves

Sense of humour

average height

long hair

tattoos

Likes giggles and short midly funny blondes

apart from the long hair that sounds just like my wife

The long hairs negotiable

she also plays on her own with fems

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