FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Couples with children; how do they do it?
Couples with children; how do they do it?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
As a single bloke my life seems full of work, chores, doing stuff for family and friends and admin involving fighting some bureaucratic fuckwit that wants more money out of me,but at least it is all down to me, and I can squeeze in meets and the odd club visit.
How do couples with kids hold it down? I mean kids are not like plants that you water and leave alone, they need nurturing, feeding, schools, home environment. Then fitting in meets and club visits over Xmas (or any time) it must take the tactical and logistical skills of a military commander, especially if one of you is self employed. How do you do it? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
You split up with your ex and he has them so you can have nights off, yay.
Worked for me, only coz one of my exes actually bothers with his kids though. It could backfire if you had kids with a douche. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Im childless and its simple once or twice a month you tell the babysitter its 'your time' and your off out for the night doing *insert normal couple activity here* then you go clubs, have a hell of a lot of sex then come back and in the morning your little ones and family will be none the wiser  x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Don't know! I'm single with 3 children! Just thought I'd gate crash the thread really!  "
So it will cost me three cinema tickets and three bags of chips to get them out of the way. Just make sure you bolt the front door  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
With great difficulty is the answer! As well as working/running a business, 3 kids at home, running a house, Going to the gym, season ticket for the football, finding us time let alone us + others can be really hard work. But when it works out it's all worth while |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I didn't, simple, didn't even date until my youngest was eleven. Now they are teens it is much better, but quality time with kids is far more important ..... single mum with three kids, working twelve hour days. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think we've got to the stage where is easier to have sex with each other while fantasizing about the things we could get up to if we could get out of the house! It's certainly very difficult trying to explain to single guys how difficult it is.
Then you get "I really want to meet you" (my wife obviously) "ok there's a hotel up the road book a room there and I can be there between 2100 and 2330". "Oh can't you meet half way?" "yes, i can be with you between 2200 and 2230.." that becomes a very expensive hotel room for some poor guy to pay for! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
You're assuming that everyone who has children does give them that safe nurturing home environment. I see plenty on the local updates who don't seem to give a shit, so it must be easy for them: "kids in bed cum round n get nosh of my wife". |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It's so difficult that at the moment it's just easier not to. Weekend and school holidays are largely family time. I Work during the day so that only leaves mid week evenings when hubby can babysit to meet. It isn't helped by the lack of suitable local guys that can accommodate. This is largely why i haven't met since the summer. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Im childless and its simple once or twice a month you tell the babysitter its 'your time' and your off out for the night doing *insert normal couple activity here* then you go clubs, have a hell of a lot of sex then come back and in the morning your little ones and family will be none the wiser x"
I love how someone who is childless has the answer. Now why didn't i think of that?! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
When our kids were little we used to go to endless 'engagements parties, weddings' that were all stop over events.. sometimes we just stayed at home,locked the door and turned all the phones off. . Grandma didn't mind at all,bless her |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Also if the kids are at school, you get between 9-3 free during the daytime providing you are both off work ??"
Normal people tend to work. How else do we pay for the kids that we have?  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think we've got to the stage where is easier to have sex with each other while fantasizing about the things we could get up to if we could get out of the house! It's certainly very difficult trying to explain to single guys how difficult it is.
Then you get "I really want to meet you" (my wife obviously) "ok there's a hotel up the road book a room there and I can be there between 2100 and 2330". "Oh can't you meet half way?" "yes, i can be with you between 2200 and 2230.." that becomes a very expensive hotel room for some poor guy to pay for!"
Before I met Mr, when I used to meet men alone, this was what it would be for me ... take it or leave it, and often a few hours late Sunday afternoon at a hotel close to home. Much better now the kids are older .... no time during the day due to work and even Friday evenings are difficult as I tend to be exhausted after work anyway, and not home until eightish. A Friday evening outing to a club has to be planned well in advance with extra hours worked during the week in order to be ahead of the game ... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
"Don't know! I'm single with 3 children! Just thought I'd gate crash the thread really! "
I'm the same. It's not easy doing everything yourself.
That's why we have babysitters! Although older kids are harder at times as they rarely leave the house! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It's difficult trying to get your saucy clothes on with the questioning kids still up!"
That made me chuckle as Mr likes to go out with no trousers on, even though he is wearing a long coat, I can see it. one thing to get stopped by the police when you are driving, another for the kids to spot it .... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's difficult trying to get your saucy clothes on with the questioning kids still up!
That made me chuckle as Mr likes to go out with no trousers on, even though he is wearing a long coat, I can see it. one thing to get stopped by the police when you are driving, another for the kids to spot it ...."
Lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Don't know! I'm single with 3 children! Just thought I'd gate crash the thread really!
I'm the same. It's not easy doing everything yourself.
That's why we have babysitters! Although older kids are harder at times as they rarely leave the house! "
We never accommodate now, as we can't guarantee they're gonna be out when they say they're gonna be .. as teenage /adults their plans are always changing. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *anade4Man
over a year ago
Winterton |
I must admit i have seen a few couples advertise for numerous males to come round and play with their wives in group situations..but after a certain time because of kids in bed. Is it just me who doesnt think its right inviting numerous strangers round when kids are in the house |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
" ...fitting in meets and club visits over Xmas (or any time) it must take the tactical and logistical skills of a military commander, especially if one of you is self employed. How do you do it?"
Admittedly school hols are tricky, but actually, since I am self-employed, having people round in the daytime is easy while the kids are at school. Getting a babysitter (though ours now don't need one) so you can go to a club is no different from going to a vanilla nightclub. Finally, next year we're going to consider nights away round the country in Travelodges while Granny comes for a holiday - or at least we were until I read that other thread.
Mr ddc |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's difficult trying to get your saucy clothes on with the questioning kids still up!"
This  My 16yr old would ask loads of questions if I went out in a skirt and heels because that's not how I normally dress. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We haven't managed it yet.
Probably could if we put more of an effort in but by the time we can get both kids out to their Grandparents and we finally get time to ourselves, we just want to chill out, catch up on enjoying just EACHOTHER and SLEEP!
- Amy. x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I must admit i have seen a few couples advertise for numerous males to come round and play with their wives in group situations..but after a certain time because of kids in bed. Is it just me who doesnt think its right inviting numerous strangers round when kids are in the house "
It's not something we would do but everyone is different. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I must admit i have seen a few couples advertise for numerous males to come round and play with their wives in group situations..but after a certain time because of kids in bed. Is it just me who doesnt think its right inviting numerous strangers round when kids are in the house "
Some people just don't give a shit about their kids and care more about fucking strangers. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's difficult trying to get your saucy clothes on with the questioning kids still up!"
Take then on a bag and change at the venue. My children do not question Mummy going out with a bag, dressed in her normal street clothes. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's difficult trying to get your saucy clothes on with the questioning kids still up!
Take then on a bag and change at the venue. My children do not question Mummy going out with a bag, dressed in her normal street clothes."
That kinda ruins the moment when you turn up at the hotel room and say...shut your eyes and hang on a minutel while i get changed into what i wanted to wear just so you can take it off me again |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
As you know Ozzz, i have a child....she lives with me, but stays at her fathers at weekends. I therefore plan any meets or club visits around my free time x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"As you know Ozzz, i have a child....she lives with me, but stays at her fathers at weekends. I therefore plan any meets or club visits around my free time x"
Yes it's much easier for single parents who have arrangements with the other parent. People do always assume it's harder for single parents than it is for couples but personally i think it can be potentially easier for a lot. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"As you know Ozzz, i have a child....she lives with me, but stays at her fathers at weekends. I therefore plan any meets or club visits around my free time x
Yes it's much easier for single parents who have arrangements with the other parent. People do always assume it's harder for single parents than it is for couples but personally i think it can be potentially easier for a lot."
Assuming the other parent or relatives are around to babysit. Mine weren't, although my kids did go to my mum a lot before and after school because of my job .... and the spare time I had, when they were at primary school and even to a large extent today, I prefer to spend on family time .... that's why meeting someone on here was ideal for both if us and all of our children ... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
We accom as our eldest stays at his girlfriends every weekend and our youngest has sleepovers at a friends down the road. But we do ideally look for others who can accom. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"As you know Ozzz, i have a child....she lives with me, but stays at her fathers at weekends. I therefore plan any meets or club visits around my free time x
Yes it's much easier for single parents who have arrangements with the other parent. People do always assume it's harder for single parents than it is for couples but personally i think it can be potentially easier for a lot.
Assuming the other parent or relatives are around to babysit. Mine weren't, although my kids did go to my mum a lot before and after school because of my job .... and the spare time I had, when they were at primary school and even to a large extent today, I prefer to spend on family time .... that's why meeting someone on here was ideal for both if us and all of our children ..."
Yes i was making that assumptiom and did say "it's easier for those who have that arrangement with the other parent". I appreciate not all single parents do. We also have to rely on distant family hence why we gave up meeting as a couple. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Thanks for the contributions very interesting. my apologies for leaving out single parents no disrespect meant to them and clearly they get my respect too. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I must admit i have seen a few couples advertise for numerous males to come round and play with their wives in group situations..but after a certain time because of kids in bed. Is it just me who doesnt think its right inviting numerous strangers round when kids are in the house "
m
I can't imagine a time when I would ever entertain the idea but others do & what they get upto isn't my problem. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"As you know Ozzz, i have a child....she lives with me, but stays at her fathers at weekends. I therefore plan any meets or club visits around my free time x
Yes it's much easier for single parents who have arrangements with the other parent. People do always assume it's harder for single parents than it is for couples but personally i think it can be potentially easier for a lot.
Assuming the other parent or relatives are around to babysit. Mine weren't, although my kids did go to my mum a lot before and after school because of my job .... and the spare time I had, when they were at primary school and even to a large extent today, I prefer to spend on family time .... that's why meeting someone on here was ideal for both if us and all of our children ...
Yes i was making that assumptiom and did say "it's easier for those who have that arrangement with the other parent". I appreciate not all single parents do. We also have to rely on distant family hence why we gave up meeting as a couple."
When married we'd get grandparents to babysit regularly so we could socialise with friends. Now I'm single I get 1 free night a week (alternate Fri/Sat) when boys go to their dad & I arrange all my social life round that. In nearly 4 years I can count on 1 hand how many times I've asked grandparents to babysit |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Also if the kids are at school, you get between 9-3 free during the daytime providing you are both off work ??
Normal people tend to work. How else do we pay for the kids that we have? "
I class myself as normal, I do work shifts as to quite a few people. Not everyone has 9-5 jobs |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
With my first wife it was always with friends. They were always round the house and so no suspicions were raised and we would have sex when we knew the kids were asleep. Which wasn't often, most evenings were spent chatting and having the crack |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Also if the kids are at school, you get between 9-3 free during the daytime providing you are both off work ??
Normal people tend to work. How else do we pay for the kids that we have?
I class myself as normal, I do work shifts as to quite a few people. Not everyone has 9-5 jobs "
Ok perhaps normal wasn't the best word. Majority may have been better. But i still think that it's highly unlikely you're going to get 2 couples that coordinated that they are all off work during school hours. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Im childless and its simple once or twice a month you tell the babysitter its 'your time' and your off out for the night doing *insert normal couple activity here* then you go clubs, have a hell of a lot of sex then come back and in the morning your little ones and family will be none the wiser x"
if your childless why do you need a baby sitter ?? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We haven't managed it yet.
Probably could if we put more of an effort in but by the time we can get both kids out to their Grandparents and we finally get time to ourselves, we just want to chill out, catch up on enjoying just EACHOTHER and SLEEP!
- Amy. x"
that is us all over. Or when you do get the time it is nice to be just the two of you.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Roughly once a month the children go off to the grandparents. That's our free time..."
Same for us.. Sadly the last 2 times we have been let down by couples. This month we are not taking any chances and doing a club and hotel  x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's difficult trying to get your saucy clothes on with the questioning kids still up!
Take then on a bag and change at the venue. My children do not question Mummy going out with a bag, dressed in her normal street clothes.
That kinda ruins the moment when you turn up at the hotel room and say...shut your eyes and hang on a minutel while i get changed into what i wanted to wear just so you can take it off me again"
Why not have a drink and a chat, excuse yourself and go get changed in the bathroom? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Roughly once a month the children go off to the grandparents. That's our free time...
Same for us.. Sadly the last 2 times we have been let down by couples. This month we are not taking any chances and doing a club and hotel x "
We only play at clubs partly for that reason... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
dont breathe to much of a sigh of relief even after they leave home - my girlie just moved back in with me - going to see more of her now than i ever did i think |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's difficult trying to get your saucy clothes on with the questioning kids still up!
Take then on a bag and change at the venue. My children do not question Mummy going out with a bag, dressed in her normal street clothes.
That kinda ruins the moment when you turn up at the hotel room and say...shut your eyes and hang on a minutel while i get changed into what i wanted to wear just so you can take it off me again
Why not have a drink and a chat, excuse yourself and go get changed in the bathroom?"
You make the inside of a Travelodge sound almost idyllic lol
"come warm yourself by the fire, drink this fine champagne (which won't affect your drive home in 2 hours time), we will sit and talk of world events and such. Then, when you are feeling calm, go to the tiny bathroom with your sexy lingerie, evening gown, make-up and hair straighteners. Please be careful you do not fall into the tiny bath when you are hopping around with one stocking on.." |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Also if the kids are at school, you get between 9-3 free during the daytime providing you are both off work ??
Normal people tend to work. How else do we pay for the kids that we have?
I class myself as normal, I do work shifts as to quite a few people. Not everyone has 9-5 jobs
Ok perhaps normal wasn't the best word. Majority may have been better. But i still think that it's highly unlikely you're going to get 2 couples that coordinated that they are all off work during school hours. "
You are right, it is difficult, but also possible. I suppose it depends on what your looking for as well, if a couple just wants to meet a single male or female the chances are are but better. Stunning pictures btw |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
You are right, it is difficult, but also possible. I suppose it depends on what your looking for as well, if a couple just wants to meet a single male or female the chances are are but better. Stunning pictures btw "
Why do you suppose it's any easier to meet with a single? Because they are less likely to be in the same situation? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
You are right, it is difficult, but also possible. I suppose it depends on what your looking for as well, if a couple just wants to meet a single male or female the chances are are but better. Stunning pictures btw
Why do you suppose it's any easier to meet with a single? Because they are less likely to be in the same situation?"
Only potentially 3 people schedules to work round, not 4 if if was 2 couples meeting. Everyone's situations different so that is an added factor, less people = less variables. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I must admit i have seen a few couples advertise for numerous males to come round and play with their wives in group situations..but after a certain time because of kids in bed. Is it just me who doesnt think its right inviting numerous strangers round when kids are in the house "
When i was meeting when my son was younger i had loads of guys mesaage asking to meet and when i said sorry i have my child the amount of guys who said thats ok we can be quiet or just pop out to my car for a quickie they will never know was unbelievable, really made me so mad i would never bring a stranger in while my child was here or even leave the house for fun |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
