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By *irtyGirl OP Woman
over a year ago
Edinburgh |
I was out with mates for dinner the other night and one of them is trying for a baby. They're having problems and the subject got onto IVF and sperm/egg donation. I feel for them cause she really wants to have kids but her hubby isn't keen on the adoption route.
I'm too old to donate eggs now but I'm fairly sure it's a pretty horrendous process. Donating sperm to me seems like a fairly straightforward (wank in a cup) process. 
I'm curious... has anyone ever donated sperm/eggs?
Would you consider using a sperm donor service if you needed to or would you ask someone you knew to donate?
Wondering if I'm opening a can of worms with this but what are your thoughts on surrogacy? Would you? Have you? Could you?
*kills cat before someone else does* |
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I've done the wank in a cup routine but that was when my ex wife and I were having difficulties conceiving. It turned out that there was nothing wrong with either of us we just took a very long time to get there. Five years , with one miscarraige along the way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
Someone close to me has donated eggs,she did this to get some of her own IVF treatment cheaper as well as helping someone else in the same situation that was having difficulty conceiving
She donated on 3 occassions until they told her she was then too old,it was'nt a pleasant experience for her |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
ooooh... serious one...
I know that sperm donations have gone down the the past few years after a rulling that once the child turns 18, they can legally ask for the name of the donor.. where in the past they couldn't
but i don't think I would want it to be someone "too close" friends wise either.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have offered my body as a surrogate for a close member of my family after 4 failed IVF attempts. I did this because she gets pregnant with no problem, but 4 times her body has rejected the baby at around 12-16 weeks. My heart broke for her. I have 2 healthy children and no desire to have any more and I have to say that pregnancy is something I'm good at! They are taking a break but its very much still an open offer.
I was adopted, as was my sibling, so this is all very much close to my heart.
I've looked into egg donation but it can't be done in my home town so it meant a lot of visits to another city and with my children and job and being a single mum I couldn't do that. If they made it more accessible I'd deffo donate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I nailed both my wives a couple of months after marrying them (both children were planned pregnancies). It seems I only have to rub up against a woman trying to get pregnant and the job's as good as done lol.
My brother is the same, he has two kids also and one of those was conceived on a prison conjugal rights visit!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can't have kids and I could never afford IVF so I've got used to the fact we can't have them. If someone offered to help now I'd say no, there's always fostering another thing we have considered. All swings and roundabouts.
But we have the dogs and are happy :0) |
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"I just did a bit of research on sperm donation... I found an article that says it costs £2000 a go! 
Bet the donor doesn't get a big chunk of that!! "
about £250 it seems
http://www.yorkshireeveningpost.co.uk/news/Sperm-bank-to-be-set.6695075.jp |
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We've been trying for a baby for 18 months and are now going down the IVF route and we may have to consider the donor route.
We wouldn't be happy with either an egg OR a sperm donor, but we may be happier with both IYSWIM. I could perhaps deal a bit better with an egg donor than *Him* could a sperm donor, as even tho the child would be his and not mine, i'd (hopefully) be able to carry it so it would feel more like mine (does that make sense?)
A couple of people have offered to donate eggs for us since mine appear to be knackered. Of those people, I think only one understands the true implications of what she's offering (she spoke to her doctor about it) but because she's my best friend, I don't know how easy it would be when we're together for me to look at my child and not think "she's your mother, not me" and probably vice versa for my friend.
There's a reason they make you have counselling before these types of decisions - it totally screws with your head during what is a particularly difficult time anyway.
I hate the fact they allow children to know who their donor was - it's made donations of both egg and sperm drop dramatically. In some clinics (including ours) there's up to a 2 year wait for egg donors at the moment (unless you have a 'known donor' which bumps you to the top)
I don't blame people for not donating, but I wish more would. It could be life changing for people like us who can't explain the desperation we have for a baby of our own.
*Her* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I know what your going through and in the end we just couldn't go through anymore heartache.
So that's why we stopped.
I hope it all works out for you and if you need to chat feel free to PM me xxxxx |
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"I just did a bit of research on sperm donation... I found an article that says it costs £2000 a go!
Bet the donor doesn't get a big chunk of that!! "
Wow - that's steep. Our clinic charges the following:
Use of donor sperm £500
Donor eggs per recipient £2,000
Supply and demand. Most infertiles wopuld pay whatever the going rate is if it means they could have a child and sell their house to get it. The problem is, the clinics know this. There's money to be made from peoples misery.
*Her*
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